1
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{\an8}《飛出個未來》

2
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{\an8}(超過一萬條五星負評!)

3
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(老媽牌老式機器人潤滑油)

4
00:00:17,392 --> 00:00:18,476
(吃吧!單身狗糧,口味升級!)

5
00:00:18,477 --> 00:00:19,560
(女孩,女孩,外星人)

6
00:00:19,561 --> 00:00:20,896
(集體催眠時間)

7
00:00:22,981 --> 00:00:24,816
(單身狗糧,免加肉汁!)

8
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(行星快遞)

9
00:00:27,319 --> 00:00:28,487
(老媽牌友善機器人公司)

10
00:00:42,376 --> 00:00:43,960
{\an8}今天天氣真好

11
00:00:43,961 --> 00:00:47,255
{\an8}該起床行光合作用了

12
00:00:47,256 --> 00:00:48,966
{\an8}聞聞水的味道清醒吧

13
00:00:51,093 --> 00:00:53,010
{\an8}妳的蠢爸爸又來了

14
00:00:53,011 --> 00:00:55,263
{\an8}又對著那棵咖啡樹碎碎念了

15
00:00:55,264 --> 00:00:57,974
{\an8}這不只是一棵樹,女人,它是我爸

16
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{\an8}它從他的墳墓裡長出來
吸走他屍體的人格

17
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{\an8}來吧,爸,讓他們看看你會說話

18
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{\an8}是啊,我聽到他的聲音了

19
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{\an8}他說:「別像個瘋子一樣
去跟家人一起吃早餐吧」

20
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{\an8}你為什麼不在她們面前開口?

21
00:01:17,160 --> 00:01:18,704
{\an8}我喜歡讓你坐立難安

22
00:01:21,623 --> 00:01:24,542
{\an8}但我快撐不住了

23
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我的葉子掉了,我的豆子下垂

24
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該把我丟進堆肥裡了

25
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但你不想看你的孫子長大嗎?

26
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{\an8}我要怎麼看,你這笨蛋?

27
00:01:37,472 --> 00:01:38,848
{\an8}我沒有眼球

28
00:01:38,849 --> 00:01:41,142
{\an8}那這些白點是什麼?

29
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{\an8}我不知道,我覺得看起來像沒熟的豆子

30
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{\an8}我還以為你看不見

31
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你的葉子上也有斑點

32
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可能是某種植物病害

33
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沒關係,兒子

34
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順其自然吧

35
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絕對有關係,你需要幫助

36
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你忘了你的肉排蛋三明治

37
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(行星快遞)

38
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赫米斯人呢?

39
00:02:07,961 --> 00:02:10,881
{\an8}沒有提早十分鐘到感覺不像他

40
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今天是「帶植物來上班」日嗎?

41
00:02:14,635 --> 00:02:17,553
不是,這是我爸,他生病了

42
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什麼?

43
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{\an8}對,你可憐的爸爸

44
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- 好吧
- 那是他爸沒錯

45
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我們在敷衍他

46
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我看到你在眨眼

47
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{\an8}康拉德先生!

48
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{\an8}我剛好認識一位精通園藝的好心女士

49
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她是植物醫生嗎?

50
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{\an8}她拿到植物學學位後就是了

51
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{\an8}她叫瑪麗安

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瑪麗什麼?

53
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{\an8}瑪麗安,你的前女友?

54
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{\an8}全宇宙唯一覺得你身上味道
有吸引力的女人?

55
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{\an8}就是她,我甚至有證據

56
00:02:49,503 --> 00:02:52,672
天啊!你的皮夾怎麼放得下那麼多照片?

57
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{\an8}很簡單,裡面又沒有錢會佔空間

58
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{\an8}所以你跟她還...

59
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{\an8}是,但也不是

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{\an8}她過去幾年都在火星大學讀書
所以我們暫時分開

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{\an8}了解,她甩了他

62
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情況很複雜

63
00:03:10,649 --> 00:03:12,900
但我們還是關心彼此

64
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是啊,是關係複雜

65
00:03:15,529 --> 00:03:17,321
我爸在掉葉子,各位

66
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我會打電話問她能不能幫忙

67
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(佐艾伯格家)

68
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瑪麗安,我是約翰

69
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等一下,我關一下前蓋

70
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(地污大道巴士總站)

71
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(假釋犯首選客運)

72
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我好久沒見到她了

73
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花會太誇張嗎?

74
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不會,她會喜歡的

75
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你說得對,我太刻意了

76
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好吃

77
00:03:45,934 --> 00:03:49,728
約翰,好漂亮的花梗,謝謝

78
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很高興見到妳

79
00:03:51,731 --> 00:03:54,401
不,不行,我要抱一下

80
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(色管家)

81
00:04:01,783 --> 00:04:03,410
看吧?我就說很好玩吧

82
00:04:04,369 --> 00:04:06,370
各位,記得瑪麗安嗎?

83
00:04:06,371 --> 00:04:08,706
瑪麗安,記得大家嗎?

84
00:04:08,707 --> 00:04:11,542
當然,見到你們真好

85
00:04:11,543 --> 00:04:13,545
- 好耶!
- 很高興見到妳!

86
00:04:14,421 --> 00:04:15,504
就是她!

87
00:04:15,505 --> 00:04:18,090
這需要來一場「什麼都不做」的熱舞派對

88
00:04:18,091 --> 00:04:19,758
好耶!來吧,好耶!

89
00:04:19,759 --> 00:04:21,636
跳舞吧!扭扭屁股!

90
00:04:22,888 --> 00:04:23,888
我討厭這裡

91
00:04:23,889 --> 00:04:26,223
妳舟車勞頓一定累壞了

92
00:04:26,224 --> 00:04:29,935
要我幫妳拿點自來水還是一包芥末醬嗎?

93
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水就好了

94
00:04:32,314 --> 00:04:34,356
好,我們有問題要問

95
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儘管問吧

96
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承認吧,求學是妳甩掉老蟹的藉口吧?

97
00:04:40,280 --> 00:04:41,739
什麼?才不是!

98
00:04:41,740 --> 00:04:46,869
我一直夢想攻讀植物學
但我只是個可憐的賣花女

99
00:04:46,870 --> 00:04:48,454
我永遠也負擔不起

100
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直到約翰讓我的夢想成真

101
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他幫我付學費好多年了

102
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真的嗎?

103
00:04:56,588 --> 00:04:58,422
他突然變得有點性感

104
00:04:58,423 --> 00:05:01,717
等等,佐艾伯格怎麼付得起錢?

105
00:05:01,718 --> 00:05:03,010
他身無分文

106
00:05:03,011 --> 00:05:05,722
對,因為他一直幫我付學費

107
00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:08,265
他沒告訴你們?

108
00:05:08,266 --> 00:05:09,976
他就是這樣

109
00:05:13,063 --> 00:05:14,063
怎麼了?

110
00:05:14,064 --> 00:05:16,565
你們怎麼不用輕蔑的眼神看著我?

111
00:05:16,566 --> 00:05:19,693
我用木星重力助推,搭了九千萬哩的巴士

112
00:05:19,694 --> 00:05:22,071
可不是為了來閒聊的

113
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- 我的病人呢?
- 在這裡

114
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摩卡枯萎病,真可惜

115
00:05:29,871 --> 00:05:31,664
這株植物很快就會死了

116
00:05:31,665 --> 00:05:34,000
不過花盆很漂亮,把花盆留下來

117
00:05:38,004 --> 00:05:40,256
我想赫米斯需要獨處一下

118
00:05:40,257 --> 00:05:42,092
來吧,放尊重點

119
00:05:42,926 --> 00:05:44,677
好耶!跟上節奏,各位

120
00:05:44,678 --> 00:05:49,599
大秀班德舞步,跟上節奏,各位,好耶!

121
00:05:54,396 --> 00:05:56,272
抱歉,赫米斯

122
00:05:56,273 --> 00:05:59,942
我不知道這株植物是你的...是你父親?

123
00:05:59,943 --> 00:06:01,944
或許我們可以想想辦法

124
00:06:01,945 --> 00:06:04,405
什麼辦法?我會不計一切代價

125
00:06:04,406 --> 00:06:08,701
我們得把它移到我導師管理的特殊棲息地

126
00:06:08,702 --> 00:06:11,203
- 很遠嗎?
- 不會太遠

127
00:06:11,204 --> 00:06:13,415
我們甚至不用離開宇宙

128
00:06:32,142 --> 00:06:34,268
謝謝你同意幫助我們,教授

129
00:06:34,269 --> 00:06:36,687
教授?那是我的名字

130
00:06:36,688 --> 00:06:40,524
植物生物學教授,好嗎?
我是植物生物學家

131
00:06:40,525 --> 00:06:43,694
你以前不是別的生物學家嗎?

132
00:06:43,695 --> 00:06:45,321
先是鯨魚,然後是熊

133
00:06:45,322 --> 00:06:48,741
後來我發現我討厭動物
所以我成了植物生物學家

134
00:06:48,742 --> 00:06:50,285
但你們知道嗎?

135
00:06:51,119 --> 00:06:55,205
我朋友赫米斯
想把一個心愛的樣本種在這裡

136
00:06:55,206 --> 00:06:57,041
一棵小咖啡樹

137
00:06:57,042 --> 00:07:00,169
咖啡樹,我喜歡咖啡樹

138
00:07:00,170 --> 00:07:02,255
- 真的嗎?
- 妳說呢?

139
00:07:04,049 --> 00:07:05,716
上面長滿了摩卡枯萎病

140
00:07:05,717 --> 00:07:07,384
只有這樣才能保持植株完整

141
00:07:07,385 --> 00:07:08,469
你就直說吧

142
00:07:08,470 --> 00:07:11,013
他有任何存活的機會嗎?

143
00:07:11,014 --> 00:07:14,351
很抱歉這麼說,但是...有的

144
00:07:17,896 --> 00:07:21,398
這些溫室太壯觀了

145
00:07:21,399 --> 00:07:22,650
你說是就是吧

146
00:07:22,651 --> 00:07:25,277
這些溫室是為了
保存全宇宙的植物而打造的

147
00:07:25,278 --> 00:07:26,862
為什麼?我不知道

148
00:07:26,863 --> 00:07:29,239
對咖啡樹來說似乎有點乾

149
00:07:29,240 --> 00:07:32,660
這個溫室裡種的是宇宙西南部的植物

150
00:07:32,661 --> 00:07:33,994
大多是多肉植物

151
00:07:33,995 --> 00:07:36,121
我簡稱它們「多弱植物」

152
00:07:36,122 --> 00:07:38,625
- 那不是簡稱
- 那樣比較正確

153
00:07:40,460 --> 00:07:42,087
對,你最好滾開!

154
00:07:45,090 --> 00:07:46,924
這是雲霧林區

155
00:07:46,925 --> 00:07:50,886
我討厭這個,因為加濕器
要設定在蓋恩斯維爾的濕度

156
00:07:50,887 --> 00:07:52,472
我覺得還好啊

157
00:07:53,056 --> 00:07:55,015
這是熱帶區

158
00:07:55,016 --> 00:07:58,269
擠滿了我的宿敵,生機

159
00:07:58,937 --> 00:08:00,604
這是我想的那個嗎?

160
00:08:00,605 --> 00:08:03,607
妳覺得這是鳳梨12的巨屍花嗎?

161
00:08:03,608 --> 00:08:04,900
沒錯

162
00:08:04,901 --> 00:08:07,986
我在書上看過,但從沒親眼見過

163
00:08:07,987 --> 00:08:10,656
這是最精緻的植物

164
00:08:10,657 --> 00:08:12,157
那也沒什麼了不起

165
00:08:12,158 --> 00:08:14,576
我長過比它好看的腫瘤

166
00:08:14,577 --> 00:08:17,538
但他們說這種花美得驚人

167
00:08:17,539 --> 00:08:22,000
我願意付出一切代價親眼看看
尤其是聞它盛開時的香氣

168
00:08:22,001 --> 00:08:24,545
我很樂意告訴妳壞消息

169
00:08:24,546 --> 00:08:26,880
但這種花每一百年才開一次花

170
00:08:26,881 --> 00:08:30,718
而且這種花跟腐爛的鯨魚一樣臭
我很清楚

171
00:08:30,719 --> 00:08:35,180
我當鯨魚生物學家時
我照顧的鯨魚都死了

172
00:08:35,181 --> 00:08:37,266
我想我會喜歡它的氣味

173
00:08:37,267 --> 00:08:40,687
但話說回來,我的品味跟多數人不同

174
00:08:44,566 --> 00:08:46,026
非常不同

175
00:08:47,610 --> 00:08:50,529
一定有地方可以塞棵咖啡樹

176
00:08:50,530 --> 00:08:52,281
我告訴你可以塞在哪裡

177
00:08:52,282 --> 00:08:55,785
就是這裡,這個半陰的火山灰土種植床

178
00:08:58,747 --> 00:09:03,209
每天噴兩次這個疫病噴霧劑
不要忽略他的豆豆

179
00:09:04,461 --> 00:09:07,047
喂!給他一點隱私

180
00:09:08,465 --> 00:09:10,674
現在我們只要等著看有沒有用

181
00:09:10,675 --> 00:09:12,176
可能要花一週左右

182
00:09:12,177 --> 00:09:14,012
我們可以待在一起一整週?

183
00:09:15,305 --> 00:09:17,307
沒關係,沒什麼大不了的

184
00:09:18,641 --> 00:09:21,769
園藝工作讓我筋疲力盡
上床睡覺吧,女士們

185
00:09:21,770 --> 00:09:24,522
- 好,晚安,約翰
- 晚安

186
00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:32,322
太經典了,我得再看一次

187
00:09:34,115 --> 00:09:35,283
晚安

188
00:09:39,370 --> 00:09:40,496
- 經典
- 太經典了!

189
00:09:40,497 --> 00:09:42,289
(女子宿舍,男子宿舍)

190
00:09:42,290 --> 00:09:44,166
(植物學家宿舍,植物禁入!)

191
00:09:44,167 --> 00:09:45,752
(《葉綠體生源說》)

192
00:09:46,294 --> 00:09:48,797
(《福爾摩嘶:巴斯克維爾的牛》)

193
00:09:49,756 --> 00:09:50,924
{\an8}(美顏肉汁)

194
00:09:57,764 --> 00:09:58,765
晚安

195
00:10:00,058 --> 00:10:03,769
佐艾伯格,謝謝你跟瑪麗安聯絡

196
00:10:03,770 --> 00:10:06,480
我終於覺得我父親有救了

197
00:10:06,481 --> 00:10:08,148
不,我才要謝謝你

198
00:10:08,149 --> 00:10:10,651
再次見到瑪麗安真的很棒

199
00:10:10,652 --> 00:10:14,905
雖然這喚起了我藏在內心深處的感受

200
00:10:14,906 --> 00:10:17,074
你得告訴她你的感受

201
00:10:17,075 --> 00:10:19,201
我和莉拉就是這樣,然後成功了!

202
00:10:19,202 --> 00:10:21,371
十年後,我們在一起了

203
00:10:23,206 --> 00:10:27,043
我剛做了一個關於惡臭的惡夢

204
00:10:31,339 --> 00:10:33,423
聞起來像腳屁股

205
00:10:33,424 --> 00:10:35,676
快點!屍花開花了

206
00:10:35,677 --> 00:10:37,302
讓我先穿上褲子

207
00:10:37,303 --> 00:10:39,556
沒時間穿褲子了,快點!

208
00:10:44,018 --> 00:10:45,394
開始了

209
00:10:45,395 --> 00:10:48,397
一百年來首次開花

210
00:10:48,398 --> 00:10:51,275
所以味道會更臭?

211
00:10:51,276 --> 00:10:52,861
天啊,希望如此

212
00:10:55,613 --> 00:10:58,158
加油,屍花,你可以的

213
00:11:17,677 --> 00:11:19,178
太美妙了

214
00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:20,554
老爹喜歡

215
00:11:20,555 --> 00:11:23,016
這個水族臭箱會把氣味封在裡面

216
00:11:27,437 --> 00:11:29,688
好多了,但還是很臭

217
00:11:29,689 --> 00:11:32,941
我們回去吸天竺葵吸到茫吧

218
00:11:32,942 --> 00:11:35,736
- 快點,我們走!
- 讓開,讓開

219
00:11:35,737 --> 00:11:39,364
那個味道好濃烈

220
00:11:39,365 --> 00:11:41,783
要不要湊近聞一聞?

221
00:11:41,784 --> 00:11:43,203
我很樂意

222
00:11:46,456 --> 00:11:48,332
很壯觀吧?

223
00:11:48,333 --> 00:11:51,586
我瘋狂的龍蝦器官都激動得顫抖不已

224
00:11:55,465 --> 00:11:58,425
瑪麗安,現在我們有時間獨處了

225
00:11:58,426 --> 00:12:00,177
也許我們可以聊一下?

226
00:12:00,178 --> 00:12:03,640
是可以,但我寧願親熱

227
00:12:22,200 --> 00:12:25,452
那兩個人昨晚沒回宿舍

228
00:12:25,453 --> 00:12:26,663
太勁爆了!

229
00:12:28,623 --> 00:12:31,750
你們去哪了?

230
00:12:31,751 --> 00:12:33,794
觀察那朵大花

231
00:12:33,795 --> 00:12:35,921
我們的確有觀察

232
00:12:35,922 --> 00:12:39,383
用各種可能的姿勢,還有一些不是

233
00:12:39,384 --> 00:12:42,428
瑪麗安,別在弗萊面前這樣

234
00:12:43,388 --> 00:12:44,596
{\an8}你餓了嗎,爸?

235
00:12:44,597 --> 00:12:47,015
{\an8}我幫你帶了一些美味的魚肥

236
00:12:47,016 --> 00:12:48,267
{\an8}你在哪裡?

237
00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:49,727
{\an8}在下面,兒子

238
00:12:51,437 --> 00:12:53,188
{\an8}- 怎麼了?
- 沒事

239
00:12:53,189 --> 00:12:56,483
我還是快死了,只是在更奇怪的地方

240
00:12:56,484 --> 00:12:59,236
但我還沒準備好說再見

241
00:12:59,237 --> 00:13:00,362
很明顯

242
00:13:00,363 --> 00:13:03,532
你在跟植物說話,但我要根除了

243
00:13:03,533 --> 00:13:05,367
是時候接受事實了

244
00:13:05,368 --> 00:13:06,953
{\an8}(鯖魚果魚肥)

245
00:13:09,414 --> 00:13:11,581
{\an8}我本來很確定它會好轉的

246
00:13:11,582 --> 00:13:12,916
{\an8}它需要的一切都有了

247
00:13:12,917 --> 00:13:14,961
{\an8}除了一個活下去的理由

248
00:13:15,586 --> 00:13:16,837
那個連我也沒有

249
00:13:16,838 --> 00:13:18,588
也許瑪麗安可以幫忙

250
00:13:18,589 --> 00:13:20,258
她在臭臭亭那裡

251
00:13:24,554 --> 00:13:25,887
我有個消息

252
00:13:25,888 --> 00:13:28,598
我也是,而且非常驚人

253
00:13:28,599 --> 00:13:32,561
我相信這株植物想跟我們溝通

254
00:13:32,562 --> 00:13:34,479
妳覺得它在跟妳說話?

255
00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:37,524
妳聽起來就像我瘋狂的死黨赫米斯

256
00:13:37,525 --> 00:13:42,195
我以為我聞過所有味道了
但這些香味太複雜了

257
00:13:42,196 --> 00:13:44,156
就像一種語言

258
00:13:44,157 --> 00:13:45,450
什麼?臭語嗎?

259
00:13:46,492 --> 00:13:48,326
我是認真的,靠近一點

260
00:13:48,327 --> 00:13:51,080
試著用鼻子聽

261
00:13:55,626 --> 00:13:57,962
什麼都沒有,也許我「重聞」

262
00:14:04,343 --> 00:14:07,220
- 你好
- 我聽到一個味道

263
00:14:07,221 --> 00:14:11,016
終於有人可以發臭的感覺真好

264
00:14:11,017 --> 00:14:15,854
通常我只會吸引蒼蠅
所以妳對我來說是很大的進步

265
00:14:15,855 --> 00:14:18,815
謝謝,我簡直不敢相信

266
00:14:18,816 --> 00:14:21,235
妳的興奮是有回報的

267
00:14:22,195 --> 00:14:24,279
這東西的字彙量好驚人

268
00:14:24,280 --> 00:14:26,364
天啊,你有知覺

269
00:14:26,365 --> 00:14:29,618
這段時間,我一直在戳你、幫你抽樣

270
00:14:29,619 --> 00:14:31,203
你能原諒我嗎?

271
00:14:31,204 --> 00:14:34,831
沒什麼好原諒的,因為我感覺不到痛苦

272
00:14:34,832 --> 00:14:37,794
我覺得你們兩個都很討喜

273
00:14:38,920 --> 00:14:42,631
你介意我在你的肉穗花序附近
收集花粉嗎?

274
00:14:42,632 --> 00:14:45,885
妳愛收集多少都可以,我會製造更多

275
00:14:46,844 --> 00:14:48,095
誰想得到呢?

276
00:14:48,096 --> 00:14:50,222
我,一個平凡的軟體動物

277
00:14:50,223 --> 00:14:52,516
和太空植物成為麻吉

278
00:14:52,517 --> 00:14:55,519
一天的工作成果還不錯吧,瑪麗安?

279
00:14:55,520 --> 00:14:58,606
你的佛焰苞好絲滑

280
00:14:59,107 --> 00:15:02,068
聞起來好香

281
00:15:04,278 --> 00:15:07,197
我很高興,請好好享受

282
00:15:07,198 --> 00:15:10,283
撫摸它,用你的臉磨蹭它

283
00:15:10,284 --> 00:15:11,702
像這樣?

284
00:15:12,662 --> 00:15:14,704
對,很好

285
00:15:14,705 --> 00:15:17,250
那樣非常好

286
00:15:24,590 --> 00:15:27,425
餵肉食植物時別靠太近

287
00:15:27,426 --> 00:15:28,970
我以前有一個助理

288
00:15:30,221 --> 00:15:31,388
{\an8}(捕呆草)

289
00:15:31,389 --> 00:15:33,140
{\an8}我們要餵它們嗎?

290
00:15:33,141 --> 00:15:36,268
瑪麗安是唯一愛過我的女孩

291
00:15:36,269 --> 00:15:39,771
但她現在愛上了那個油嘴滑舌的屍花

292
00:15:39,772 --> 00:15:41,857
哭哭!它只是一株植物

293
00:15:41,858 --> 00:15:43,900
我們有些人要面對真正的問題

294
00:15:43,901 --> 00:15:45,944
佐艾伯格,你這笨蛋!

295
00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:47,988
你的女人是植物學書呆子

296
00:15:47,989 --> 00:15:49,823
當書呆子開始鑽研所學時

297
00:15:49,824 --> 00:15:53,243
他們的興奮很容易被誤認為性奮

298
00:15:53,244 --> 00:15:56,997
記得那次我在天文館埋頭苦幹嗎?

299
00:15:56,998 --> 00:15:58,082
歷歷在目

300
00:15:58,916 --> 00:16:01,085
也許我誤解了

301
00:16:05,173 --> 00:16:08,008
我知道妳對這種植物很有興趣,瑪麗安

302
00:16:08,009 --> 00:16:09,092
我懂

303
00:16:09,093 --> 00:16:12,721
它很高,可以把二氧化碳變成澱粉

304
00:16:12,722 --> 00:16:16,224
但妳我之間的感情
是我這輩子最珍貴的東西

305
00:16:16,225 --> 00:16:19,769
所以如果妳的感覺變了,請告訴我

306
00:16:19,770 --> 00:16:20,854
我承受得住

307
00:16:20,855 --> 00:16:22,355
你說得對

308
00:16:22,356 --> 00:16:25,610
其實我愛上小屍了

309
00:16:28,446 --> 00:16:30,655
但我也愛你

310
00:16:30,656 --> 00:16:31,740
什麼?

311
00:16:31,741 --> 00:16:33,074
我需要你們兩個

312
00:16:33,075 --> 00:16:35,118
我知道這很突然

313
00:16:35,119 --> 00:16:37,662
但如果你心裡還有位子

314
00:16:37,663 --> 00:16:41,666
我想我們三個可以共度美好的生活

315
00:16:41,667 --> 00:16:42,919
三個?

316
00:16:43,711 --> 00:16:47,088
瑪麗安跟我說了很多關於你的事

317
00:16:47,089 --> 00:16:48,758
我覺得你...

318
00:16:49,967 --> 00:16:52,427
非常迷人

319
00:16:52,428 --> 00:16:56,014
- 我知道這有點不太尋常...
- 有點?

320
00:16:56,015 --> 00:16:58,768
但誰能決定愛應該是什麼樣子?

321
00:17:00,144 --> 00:17:03,356
我想愛永遠不嫌多

322
00:17:08,402 --> 00:17:13,282
沒錯,聞聞我火辣的激情言語吧

323
00:17:22,250 --> 00:17:23,250
怎麼樣?

324
00:17:23,251 --> 00:17:25,252
我不確定他能不能撐過今晚

325
00:17:25,253 --> 00:17:27,796
但我早上會回來燒掉遺骸

326
00:17:27,797 --> 00:17:29,549
帶棉花糖來,會很好玩的

327
00:17:32,718 --> 00:17:37,014
真希望我們有更多時間相處
但我很感激我們有過的一切

328
00:17:37,807 --> 00:17:38,890
聽著

329
00:17:38,891 --> 00:17:42,686
我可能從沒當過模範父親

330
00:17:42,687 --> 00:17:44,980
但我看得出良善

331
00:17:44,981 --> 00:17:48,942
現在我正看著一個好人

332
00:17:48,943 --> 00:17:51,445
- 我以為你看不到
- 別吹毛求疵,兒子

333
00:17:52,071 --> 00:17:53,863
我以你為榮

334
00:17:53,864 --> 00:17:55,575
我愛你,爸

335
00:17:56,576 --> 00:17:58,327
我不值得被愛

336
00:17:59,620 --> 00:18:00,996
幫我一個忙

337
00:18:00,997 --> 00:18:04,040
幫我把雜亂的豆子挑出來烤

338
00:18:04,041 --> 00:18:08,087
等我走了,幫我煮最後一壺

339
00:18:08,879 --> 00:18:09,880
我會的

340
00:18:12,842 --> 00:18:15,595
別把豆子煮焦了,要尊重豆子

341
00:18:25,980 --> 00:18:26,980
你們好

342
00:18:26,981 --> 00:18:29,107
我想你們應該都有點震驚

343
00:18:29,108 --> 00:18:31,192
豈止是震驚

344
00:18:31,193 --> 00:18:33,445
雖然不關你們的事

345
00:18:33,446 --> 00:18:36,990
但我們正處於一段充滿愛與承諾的
三人插花關係

346
00:18:36,991 --> 00:18:40,827
這是最噁心的變態行為

347
00:18:40,828 --> 00:18:42,621
而且不是我的變態風格

348
00:18:42,622 --> 00:18:44,039
我覺得很棒

349
00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:47,751
沒有人受傷,他們很開心
這才是最重要的

350
00:18:47,752 --> 00:18:50,838
- 我的厭惡才重要
- 只有一點點

351
00:18:54,133 --> 00:18:56,385
我同情你,老公!

352
00:19:04,393 --> 00:19:07,270
我親愛的怪人

353
00:19:07,271 --> 00:19:10,315
很抱歉我們嘲笑你的植物爸爸

354
00:19:10,316 --> 00:19:12,735
我們看得出來你的傷痛是真的

355
00:19:14,654 --> 00:19:15,904
請節哀順變

356
00:19:15,905 --> 00:19:19,157
我聽說他是個好爸爸,也是很棒的灌木

357
00:19:19,158 --> 00:19:20,950
謝謝妳試著幫他

358
00:19:20,951 --> 00:19:23,328
也謝謝你們的善意

359
00:19:23,329 --> 00:19:27,290
希望各位日出時能跟我一起向他道別

360
00:19:27,291 --> 00:19:31,211
他即將前往空中那座大植物園

361
00:19:31,212 --> 00:19:33,838
這裡不是空中大植物園嗎?

362
00:19:33,839 --> 00:19:34,965
閉嘴

363
00:19:36,550 --> 00:19:40,304
人生苦短,我們應該盡情享受

364
00:19:42,139 --> 00:19:43,431
- 驚喜!
- 驚喜!

365
00:19:43,432 --> 00:19:46,267
浪漫的野餐,有何不可呢?

366
00:19:46,268 --> 00:19:48,813
希望你有心情吃堆肥

367
00:19:52,733 --> 00:19:55,194
你聞起來很生氣,親愛的,怎麼了?

368
00:19:55,945 --> 00:19:57,654
這太難了

369
00:19:57,655 --> 00:20:00,907
我在尋找適合說出這句話的氣味

370
00:20:00,908 --> 00:20:02,534
不...不

371
00:20:02,535 --> 00:20:04,703
你們都是美麗的生物

372
00:20:04,704 --> 00:20:07,747
我深愛你們對我如此著迷

373
00:20:07,748 --> 00:20:10,542
但我愛上別人了

374
00:20:10,543 --> 00:20:12,877
你這個爛植物!

375
00:20:12,878 --> 00:20:15,798
跟誰?還是跟什麼?

376
00:20:16,340 --> 00:20:17,341
咖啡

377
00:20:20,803 --> 00:20:23,555
我不知道你們的大花在這裡

378
00:20:23,556 --> 00:20:25,473
聽著,你們一定不會相信

379
00:20:25,474 --> 00:20:28,393
但我爸的枯萎病消失了

380
00:20:28,394 --> 00:20:32,273
他長出了新的咖啡豆,真是奇蹟!

381
00:20:32,898 --> 00:20:35,651
這讓我好開心

382
00:20:37,319 --> 00:20:40,739
愛能戰勝一切,兒子,包括疾病

383
00:20:40,740 --> 00:20:43,283
謝謝你從未放棄我

384
00:20:43,284 --> 00:20:45,952
我不能把你丟在這裡等死

385
00:20:45,953 --> 00:20:50,124
對,但你可以把我留在這裡活下去

386
00:20:56,088 --> 00:20:57,256
(綠牛)

387
00:21:00,259 --> 00:21:03,553
感謝大家來參加這場荒謬的婚禮

388
00:21:03,554 --> 00:21:06,932
反正在這個鳥不生蛋的太空垃圾場
也沒有別的事可做

389
00:21:09,226 --> 00:21:11,520
喬治華盛頓卡弗曾說過

390
00:21:12,188 --> 00:21:16,816
「只要你夠愛它,任何事物都會吐露祕密

391
00:21:16,817 --> 00:21:18,401
我不只發現

392
00:21:18,402 --> 00:21:21,654
當我跟小花或小花生說話時

393
00:21:21,655 --> 00:21:23,198
它們也會說出自己的祕密

394
00:21:23,199 --> 00:21:26,701
我還發現當我靜靜地與人溝通時

395
00:21:26,702 --> 00:21:31,499
只要你夠愛它們
它們也會吐露自己的祕密」

396
00:21:33,042 --> 00:21:34,710
天啊,那傢伙是吹牛大王

397
00:21:36,462 --> 00:21:39,339
我竟然在婚禮上為植物哭泣

398
00:21:39,340 --> 00:21:40,799
為什麼?

399
00:21:40,800 --> 00:21:42,092
因為妳很棒

400
00:21:45,137 --> 00:21:47,931
這不是眼淚,這是過敏反應

401
00:21:47,932 --> 00:21:49,474
討厭的花粉

402
00:21:49,475 --> 00:21:53,770
總之,在朋友和葉子環繞下

403
00:21:53,771 --> 00:21:57,733
我現在宣布你們成為植物和植物

404
00:22:06,492 --> 00:22:11,413
各位,現在我要為大家
倒上我爸自己種的咖啡,舉杯慶祝

405
00:22:15,417 --> 00:22:16,417
你們好

406
00:22:16,418 --> 00:22:18,169
沒關係,我的朋友

407
00:22:18,170 --> 00:22:19,921
我真的很為你高興

408
00:22:19,922 --> 00:22:21,297
說得真好

409
00:22:21,298 --> 00:22:24,717
祝你們百年好合

410
00:22:24,718 --> 00:22:28,930
妳的祝福是我收到最棒的結婚禮物

411
00:22:28,931 --> 00:22:31,308
也是最便宜的

412
00:22:32,643 --> 00:22:34,102
我不喝咖啡

413
00:22:34,103 --> 00:22:36,521
咖啡因會讓我腿顫抖

414
00:22:36,522 --> 00:22:38,315
要及時行樂

415
00:22:41,777 --> 00:22:44,070
妳看起來好悲傷又疏離

416
00:22:44,071 --> 00:22:46,739
我們不再是「我們」了嗎?

417
00:22:46,740 --> 00:22:49,617
我無法想像你為什麼希望我們在一起

418
00:22:49,618 --> 00:22:51,786
我把事情搞得一團糟

419
00:22:51,787 --> 00:22:54,247
瑪麗安,世事難料

420
00:22:54,248 --> 00:22:57,750
有時人們相遇,有時墜入愛河

421
00:22:57,751 --> 00:22:59,878
有時他們為了上大學而分開

422
00:22:59,879 --> 00:23:02,297
然後嘗試他們都想要的植物關係

423
00:23:02,298 --> 00:23:03,756
結果卻不盡理想

424
00:23:03,757 --> 00:23:06,885
但如果妳誠實又善良,繼續嘗試

425
00:23:06,886 --> 00:23:09,304
有一天,妳會擁有這個

426
00:23:09,305 --> 00:23:11,849
而妳既誠實又善良

427
00:23:12,641 --> 00:23:14,476
妳想繼續嘗試嗎?

428
00:23:16,478 --> 00:23:17,479
我想

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00:23:24,278 --> 00:23:27,488
敬各種形式的愛情

430
00:23:27,489 --> 00:23:28,866
- 敬愛情
- 敬愛情

431
00:23:30,618 --> 00:23:32,368
爪哇甜岩漿,好燙

432
00:23:32,369 --> 00:23:33,787
(櫛瓜奶)

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00:24:39,937 --> 00:24:41,939
字幕翻譯:蔡宛茵