1 00:00:04,038 --> 00:00:06,440 [ Man ] One, two! One, two, three! 2 00:00:32,765 --> 00:00:35,603 Oh, put down the binoculars, Fry. 3 00:00:35,703 --> 00:00:39,307 The wall of that strip club isn't going to collapse twice in one day. 4 00:00:39,406 --> 00:00:41,808 I know, and I've grown to accept that. 5 00:00:41,908 --> 00:00:45,079 Now I'm more interested in that new pizza parlor across the street. 6 00:00:45,179 --> 00:00:48,249 Kind of makes me pine for my days as a pizza delivery boy. 7 00:00:48,348 --> 00:00:51,085 "Here's your pizza," I'd say. "I didn't order any," they'd say. 8 00:00:51,185 --> 00:00:53,387 And then I'd be off to my next adventure. 9 00:00:53,487 --> 00:00:56,457 That story stunk. Hand me the binoculars. 10 00:01:03,631 --> 00:01:05,733 I think the owner is from Signas Five. 11 00:01:05,832 --> 00:01:11,105 Signoids? On our block? Fi and foo! They should go back where they came from! 12 00:01:11,204 --> 00:01:13,073 Professor, please! 13 00:01:13,174 --> 00:01:17,478 Society's never gonna make any progress until we all learn to pretend to like each other. 14 00:01:17,578 --> 00:01:22,250 Now let's go over there and make these hideous strangers feel welcome. No! 15 00:01:22,349 --> 00:01:24,852 You sure about these-a chairs? 16 00:01:24,951 --> 00:01:28,021 Guidebook says human legs bend down at knee. 17 00:01:28,121 --> 00:01:33,360 It's okay, Mama. Anyone-a complains, I bend legs up for free. 18 00:01:33,460 --> 00:01:36,129 Ooh, customers! 19 00:01:36,229 --> 00:01:38,498 [ Bell Ringing ] 20 00:01:38,598 --> 00:01:42,135 Welcome to Earth pizza store. Here. Sit. 21 00:01:42,235 --> 00:01:45,673 I bend-a knees for you. Ooh, that's comfy. 22 00:01:47,807 --> 00:01:49,777 Uuh! 23 00:01:49,877 --> 00:01:53,546 Okay. Now, what-a kinda pizza goes in you? 24 00:01:53,646 --> 00:01:55,549 Silt? Asbestos? 25 00:01:55,649 --> 00:01:57,784 We got guano, very fresh. 26 00:01:57,884 --> 00:02:00,688 Ah, mm, do you have any food? 27 00:02:00,787 --> 00:02:05,459 Here. Try a deep-a dish pizza. Contains-a four kinda things. 28 00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:14,701 [ Both Gagging ] 29 00:02:14,801 --> 00:02:18,506 - I don't mean to offend, but this tastes like vomit. - Thank you. 30 00:02:18,605 --> 00:02:22,409 No, actually, I did mean to offend a little. This is awful. 31 00:02:22,509 --> 00:02:25,513 [ Arguing In Alien Language ] 32 00:02:28,681 --> 00:02:30,683 [ Both Sobbing ] 33 00:02:32,353 --> 00:02:35,223 Hey, hey. What's wrong? Was it something Leela said? 34 00:02:35,323 --> 00:02:38,725 We come-a to Earth to start new life, 35 00:02:38,825 --> 00:02:41,093 raise fat, spoiled Earth kids, 36 00:02:41,194 --> 00:02:46,033 hang many underwear from Earth clothesline, live Earthican dream. 37 00:02:46,133 --> 00:02:49,537 [ Sobbing Wildly ] 38 00:02:49,637 --> 00:02:53,039 Aw, don't cry, foreign people. I used to work in a pizzeria, 39 00:02:53,139 --> 00:02:55,575 and as soon as I stop hallucinating and blasting puke, 40 00:02:55,675 --> 00:02:58,278 I'm gonna teach you to sell pizza, Earth-style. 41 00:02:58,378 --> 00:03:01,348 Oh, thank you, magic biped! 42 00:03:01,449 --> 00:03:03,350 Mm-mm-mm! 43 00:03:03,450 --> 00:03:05,552 You save us-a, sir. 44 00:03:05,652 --> 00:03:09,356 If we cannot-a make-a Earth-a pizza, our dream-a will die, 45 00:03:09,456 --> 00:03:13,092 just like rats we crush to make the wine. 46 00:03:19,366 --> 00:03:22,635 For starters, only use quality ingredients. 47 00:03:22,735 --> 00:03:24,805 Case in point, no more live bees. 48 00:03:24,905 --> 00:03:27,139 [ Buzzing ] 49 00:03:27,240 --> 00:03:31,312 Oregano works equally well. And when you put pizzas in the oven, don't get in with them. 50 00:03:31,412 --> 00:03:33,546 Hey! Occupato. 51 00:03:33,646 --> 00:03:38,151 Most important of all is the big-screen TV. 52 00:03:38,252 --> 00:03:42,956 Human families need a TV while they're eating, so they don't have to talk to each other. 53 00:03:43,055 --> 00:03:46,158 Ah, the Earthican pastime, blernsball. 54 00:03:46,259 --> 00:03:48,429 [ Crowd Cheering ] 55 00:03:48,528 --> 00:03:50,598 [ Male Announcer ] Mulligan drives the ball. 56 00:03:50,698 --> 00:03:53,501 It's going, going and caught by the shortstop. 57 00:03:53,600 --> 00:03:57,305 Mets lose again. Man, I haven't seen play this bad... 58 00:03:57,405 --> 00:03:59,573 since the days of Bob Uecker. 59 00:03:59,673 --> 00:04:02,509 This is Bob Uecker saying thanks for watching. 60 00:04:02,610 --> 00:04:05,312 Mets-a? Short-a-stop-a? 61 00:04:05,413 --> 00:04:09,282 Pinching the hitter? I don't understand this blerns-a-ball. 62 00:04:09,383 --> 00:04:12,019 Well, if you're gonna be Earthicans, we'll have to teach you. 63 00:04:12,118 --> 00:04:15,254 How 'bout your pizzeria plays a game against Planet Express? 64 00:04:15,355 --> 00:04:18,158 - Oh, but you'll need nine players. - No problem. 65 00:04:18,257 --> 00:04:20,160 [ Shouting In Alien Language ] 66 00:04:20,259 --> 00:04:22,495 [ Scattered Grunts ] 67 00:04:24,831 --> 00:04:27,100 Play the ball! 68 00:04:32,271 --> 00:04:34,274 [ Dog Barking ] 69 00:04:36,175 --> 00:04:38,478 [ Scolding In Alien Language ] 70 00:04:43,350 --> 00:04:46,653 Go, team! Beat those no-good Signoids! 71 00:04:46,754 --> 00:04:50,457 Show them they stink in a game they've never played before! 72 00:04:54,362 --> 00:04:57,865 Ahh, this is-a why I love Earth-a-- 73 00:04:57,965 --> 00:05:00,468 beautiful, star-brightened day, 74 00:05:00,567 --> 00:05:03,235 friendly blernsball game with chum pals. 75 00:05:03,336 --> 00:05:05,406 So pleasant for everybody. 76 00:05:05,505 --> 00:05:07,807 - [ Grunts ] - Ohh! 77 00:05:07,908 --> 00:05:10,177 Hit by a pitch. Take your base. 78 00:05:10,276 --> 00:05:12,346 [ Gasps ] Sorry about that! 79 00:05:12,446 --> 00:05:15,182 I guess I needed a few more warm-up pitches. 80 00:05:15,281 --> 00:05:17,216 [ Moaning ] 81 00:05:18,985 --> 00:05:21,654 - No batter, no batter! - [ Grunts ] 82 00:05:21,754 --> 00:05:24,992 - No batter anymore. - Take your base. 83 00:05:25,091 --> 00:05:29,497 I didn't mean to hit you. I have some trouble with depth perception. 84 00:05:29,596 --> 00:05:32,098 Yeah, me too now. 85 00:05:32,199 --> 00:05:35,502 Hey, batter, batter, batter, batter! Hey, batter, batter, batter! 86 00:05:35,603 --> 00:05:37,838 Hey, batter, batter! Duck! 87 00:05:37,937 --> 00:05:41,942 - Take your base. - [ Crowd Murmuring ] 88 00:05:42,042 --> 00:05:46,579 Please, lady! I want to live. Can I use bat to protect head? Ow! 89 00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:49,016 - Apparently not. - [ Cheering ] 90 00:05:49,115 --> 00:05:52,019 Heh heh! Check out the one-eyed bean machine! 91 00:05:52,119 --> 00:05:54,053 [ Moaning ] 92 00:05:55,088 --> 00:05:57,757 Hooray! I make-a score point! 93 00:05:57,858 --> 00:06:01,428 Leela, you beaned a run in. You better let me pitch. 94 00:06:01,528 --> 00:06:05,533 But I've got a no-hitter going! [ Sighs ] You're right. 95 00:06:05,632 --> 00:06:08,100 Here. [ Groans ] 96 00:06:08,201 --> 00:06:10,036 [ All ] Yea! 97 00:06:10,137 --> 00:06:13,139 Don't take her out! She's a firecracker! 98 00:06:13,240 --> 00:06:17,577 Excuse me. I'd like to talk to you. Am I under arrest? 99 00:06:17,677 --> 00:06:22,915 Wait. I know you. You're the sleazebag who owns the Ultimate Robot Fighting League. 100 00:06:23,016 --> 00:06:26,720 Not anymore. Now I'm the sleazebag who owns the New New York Mets. 101 00:06:26,819 --> 00:06:29,490 The Mets? Those bums are worse than me. 102 00:06:29,589 --> 00:06:34,762 Close to it. But they don't draw a crowd like you, which is why I wanna sign you to the team. 103 00:06:34,862 --> 00:06:40,399 Oh, you mean I'd be the first woman ever to play major league blernsball? 104 00:06:40,500 --> 00:06:43,235 Well, yeah. But basically, you'd just be a publicity stunt. 105 00:06:43,336 --> 00:06:46,406 I figure a one-eyed lady skullbuster might bring out the freak-show crowd. 106 00:06:46,507 --> 00:06:51,110 Wow! The first woman ever to play major league blernsball! 107 00:06:51,211 --> 00:06:54,781 - Again, yeah. But basically, you'd just be-- - Yippee! 108 00:07:01,454 --> 00:07:06,093 Ta-da! The first woman ever to play major league blernsball! 109 00:07:06,192 --> 00:07:08,995 - How do I look? - Like a sexy Yogi Berra. 110 00:07:09,096 --> 00:07:11,531 Eh, why is your number "7/8"? 111 00:07:11,632 --> 00:07:13,701 All the whole numbers have been retired. 112 00:07:13,800 --> 00:07:17,336 Well, I must say, I'm impressed. You look just like a ballplayer. 113 00:07:17,437 --> 00:07:21,675 - Can I pat you on the butt? - Fry, I'm a professional athlete. So go ahead. 114 00:07:21,774 --> 00:07:25,177 Oh, now I'm too nervous. 115 00:07:25,278 --> 00:07:28,014 [ Crowd Cheering ] 116 00:07:34,487 --> 00:07:36,656 [ Scattered Jeers ] Boo! Come on! 117 00:07:36,757 --> 00:07:41,194 Well, folks, it's only the fifth inning, but the Swedes have turned this one into a laugher, 118 00:07:41,293 --> 00:07:43,362 and that's with two F's. 119 00:07:43,463 --> 00:07:47,634 The crowd is pouring out of the stadium L.A.-style. 120 00:07:47,735 --> 00:07:51,971 Skipper, we're losin' the crowd. Put in our new novelty act, Leela. 121 00:07:52,072 --> 00:07:56,308 - [ Delighted Gasp ] - Nagdaggit! I already put in the circus clown! 122 00:07:56,408 --> 00:08:00,180 Yeah, but he bunted. Clowns are only funny when they swing away. 123 00:08:00,279 --> 00:08:03,684 [ Man On P.A. ] Your attention, please. Now pitching for the Mets, 124 00:08:03,783 --> 00:08:06,319 Turanga Leela, 125 00:08:07,855 --> 00:08:10,389 a one-eyed woman. [ All Exclaiming ] 126 00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:14,060 Hoo-hoo! Come on! Throw like a girl! 127 00:08:14,161 --> 00:08:16,163 [ All Cheering ] 128 00:08:16,262 --> 00:08:18,197 Too much eyeliner! 129 00:08:18,298 --> 00:08:21,401 [ Uecker ] This is history in the making, folks. 130 00:08:21,500 --> 00:08:24,838 Bjornson steps up to the plate and Leela delivers. 131 00:08:24,937 --> 00:08:27,507 - Oh, gee! - [ Bender ] Bull's-eye! 132 00:08:27,608 --> 00:08:30,377 [ Uecker ] Ooh! An inauspicious start... 133 00:08:30,476 --> 00:08:33,113 for the career of the first woman blernsballer. 134 00:08:35,048 --> 00:08:37,951 - Uuh! - D'oh! 135 00:08:38,051 --> 00:08:41,020 An inauspicious continuation for the career of the first woman blernsballer. 136 00:08:41,120 --> 00:08:43,890 - Ooh! - [ All Muttering, Chuckling ] 137 00:08:53,033 --> 00:08:55,302 [ All ] Bean! Bean! Bean! 138 00:08:55,402 --> 00:08:58,905 Bean! Bean! Bean! Bean! Bean! 139 00:08:59,005 --> 00:09:01,908 Bean! Bean! Uuh! 140 00:09:02,009 --> 00:09:04,043 Oh! [ Crowd Cheering ] 141 00:09:04,144 --> 00:09:09,448 Ouch! It's a three-beanball salad. The Mets fans love it, though, and who can blame them? 142 00:09:09,548 --> 00:09:11,551 They haven't had much to cheer about this year. Ooh! 143 00:09:11,652 --> 00:09:13,552 [ Crowd Cheering ] 144 00:09:17,825 --> 00:09:22,929 Kid, that was great. You got us more publicity than a cowboy in a shark tank. 145 00:09:23,029 --> 00:09:25,164 Poor Tex. He was quite a shark. 146 00:09:26,166 --> 00:09:28,635 Whoop! 147 00:09:30,070 --> 00:09:33,673 [ Scattered ] Hey! Hey, come on! Ooh, sorry. I win. 148 00:09:33,774 --> 00:09:37,309 Oop, sorry. 149 00:09:37,409 --> 00:09:42,249 Bender, how did you get in here? As your agent, I have access to you at all times. 150 00:09:42,349 --> 00:09:44,985 - Since when are you my agent? - [ Chiming ] 151 00:09:45,085 --> 00:09:47,988 Quiet! Call comin' in. Yes? 152 00:09:48,087 --> 00:09:50,823 A big endorsement deal for Leela? How much? 153 00:09:50,923 --> 00:09:56,495 Hey! You put a one and two zeroes in front of that, or we pass! Deal! 154 00:09:56,596 --> 00:10:01,301 Bender, that's great! How much did you get me? One hundred dollars. 155 00:10:04,303 --> 00:10:08,508 As a pitcher, I serve up plenty of beanballs, 156 00:10:08,607 --> 00:10:11,879 so I know good beans when I see them. 157 00:10:11,979 --> 00:10:15,783 Bean-Bay Beans. They're the beaniest. 158 00:10:15,883 --> 00:10:17,784 [ Man ] Cut! 159 00:10:17,884 --> 00:10:21,889 [ Crowd ] Bean! Bean! Bean! Bean! 160 00:10:21,989 --> 00:10:25,491 [ Uecker ] In very short order, Leela has become a fan favorite. 161 00:10:25,591 --> 00:10:29,663 - Bean! Bean! Bean! Bean! - Uuh! 162 00:10:29,763 --> 00:10:31,731 [ Crowd Cheering ] 163 00:10:33,165 --> 00:10:35,903 [ Sirens Wailing ] 164 00:10:37,971 --> 00:10:39,706 You're the best, babe. 165 00:10:39,807 --> 00:10:42,009 [ Chiming ] Hang on. Call comin' in. What's that? 166 00:10:42,109 --> 00:10:46,479 Hey, you put a one and two zeroes in front of that, or we pass! Deal! 167 00:10:46,578 --> 00:10:50,317 So what did you get me? A thousand and one pesos. 168 00:10:50,417 --> 00:10:54,421 [ Clapboard Claps ] Yo soy muy malo en lanzar. 169 00:10:54,520 --> 00:10:58,524 Pero yo soy muy bueno en comer frijoles. 170 00:10:58,625 --> 00:11:03,429 Come los Bean-Bay frijoles, los frijoles de los reyes. 171 00:11:03,529 --> 00:11:07,500 Cut! Okay, now do one with the bean suit on. 172 00:11:07,600 --> 00:11:10,336 [ Murmurings ] 173 00:11:13,039 --> 00:11:15,542 Leela really bringin' in the customers. 174 00:11:15,642 --> 00:11:19,046 This keep up, we need to buy second sauce toilet. 175 00:11:19,145 --> 00:11:23,682 When I grow up, I want to injure men by throwing stuff at them, just like you, Leela. 176 00:11:23,783 --> 00:11:27,553 - Will you sign my magazine? - Aw, sure thing, sweetie. 177 00:11:27,653 --> 00:11:31,892 - Who should I make it out to? - Well, uh, to eBay. 178 00:11:31,991 --> 00:11:36,363 That's a popular name today. Little "e," big "B"? 179 00:11:39,198 --> 00:11:41,134 [ Beeping ] Heh, heh! 180 00:11:41,234 --> 00:11:43,702 Five bucks an autograph, 200 fans. 181 00:11:43,803 --> 00:11:47,106 Add a one and two zeroes in front of that, we got ourselves a wad. 182 00:11:47,206 --> 00:11:49,308 I'm not doing this for the wad. 183 00:11:49,408 --> 00:11:52,479 I'm doing it for all the struggling female athletes who need a role model. 184 00:11:52,578 --> 00:11:55,481 Yeah, a role model for how to stink. [ All Exclaiming ] 185 00:11:55,581 --> 00:11:58,650 - What? Who are you? - Jackie Anderson. 186 00:11:58,751 --> 00:12:03,823 I'm on the blernsball team at NNYU, and I was hoping to get to play in the majors soon. 187 00:12:03,923 --> 00:12:06,092 Oh! Following in my footsteps. 188 00:12:06,192 --> 00:12:09,996 [ Scoffs ] God forbid! Your little freak show is making it impossible... 189 00:12:10,096 --> 00:12:13,066 for real female ballplayers to be taken seriously. 190 00:12:13,166 --> 00:12:16,937 I hope you're proud of yourself. 191 00:12:20,307 --> 00:12:22,475 [ Whimpering ] 192 00:12:22,575 --> 00:12:24,476 [ Sobbing ] 193 00:12:24,576 --> 00:12:29,182 All right. Show's over. No refunds. You heard the robot. Get out. 194 00:12:32,318 --> 00:12:37,456 I'm a fool. The fans haven't been cheering for me. They've been cheering at me. 195 00:12:37,557 --> 00:12:42,830 Don't be upset, Leela. You, um-- You look really cute in your uniform. 196 00:12:42,929 --> 00:12:48,168 That's what makes it so sad! I thought I was doing something heroic! 197 00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:51,303 You are! What about that little girl you visited in the hospital? 198 00:12:51,403 --> 00:12:53,539 You know the one I mean-- the one who died? 199 00:12:53,639 --> 00:12:57,277 You're right. I can't let people down anymore. 200 00:12:57,376 --> 00:13:02,982 As God is my witness, I vow to earn the respect of girls and women everywhere. 201 00:13:03,082 --> 00:13:07,320 I will become the best blernsball player of all time! 202 00:13:07,419 --> 00:13:10,289 [ Clears Throat ] That's statistically impossible. 203 00:13:10,389 --> 00:13:13,360 In 77 innings, you haven't gotten a single out. 204 00:13:13,460 --> 00:13:17,496 At this rate, you're sure to go down as the worst blernsball player of all time! 205 00:13:17,596 --> 00:13:20,332 Oh. Then I have a new vow. 206 00:13:20,432 --> 00:13:26,338 I solemnly swear I will become not the worst blernsball player of all time! 207 00:13:28,008 --> 00:13:29,976 [ Groans ] 208 00:13:45,825 --> 00:13:49,361 Hey, look. The players who broke the various color barriers. 209 00:13:49,461 --> 00:13:53,066 When will man learn that all races... 210 00:13:53,165 --> 00:13:55,701 are equally inferior to robots? 211 00:13:55,802 --> 00:13:59,772 Ah, here we are-- the worst player in history. 212 00:13:59,873 --> 00:14:03,842 If I can be just a little better than him, I can slink away with my head held high. 213 00:14:03,943 --> 00:14:08,048 It says he once struck out when his tongue got stuck to an unusually cold bat. 214 00:14:08,148 --> 00:14:10,450 And here he is trying to make a catch with an oven mitt. 215 00:14:10,549 --> 00:14:12,851 It's even a crummy hologram. 216 00:14:12,952 --> 00:14:16,623 I'm not a hologram, though I am crummy. Hank Aaron XXIV. 217 00:14:16,722 --> 00:14:21,628 Hank Aaron XXIV? How could you play so blowfully? The original Hank Aaron was great. 218 00:14:21,727 --> 00:14:25,731 No, I was better than great. I was the home run king. 219 00:14:25,831 --> 00:14:29,635 - Neat! - So, Hank-- the bad Hank-- 220 00:14:29,735 --> 00:14:33,240 just how blowful were you? Well, I had a low batting average. 221 00:14:33,340 --> 00:14:38,445 Low? It was zero, you fungo. You went your whole career without getting a hit. 222 00:14:38,544 --> 00:14:41,948 Leela can beat that. She's pitched her whole career without getting an out. 223 00:14:42,048 --> 00:14:44,616 [ Chuckles ] You stink, lady! 224 00:14:44,716 --> 00:14:47,820 Hey, junior. She belongs in the exhibit instead of you. 225 00:14:47,921 --> 00:14:51,290 Forget it. This job's too cushy to give up. 226 00:14:51,390 --> 00:14:55,794 [ Slurping ] Ah, Wade Boggs. Goes down smooth. 227 00:14:55,894 --> 00:14:59,631 Look, I don't wanna be in this exhibit. That's why I need your help-- 228 00:14:59,731 --> 00:15:02,802 so I can be one tiny iota less pathetic than you. 229 00:15:02,902 --> 00:15:07,073 Oh, I can't help you play better than Tiny Iota. That guy was great. 230 00:15:07,173 --> 00:15:09,442 But I'll teach you everything I know. 231 00:15:11,477 --> 00:15:13,812 Okay, let's see what you can do. 232 00:15:13,913 --> 00:15:17,484 One thing she can do is lodge a ball in the dead center of your brain. 233 00:15:17,583 --> 00:15:20,320 You better get a batting helmet. 234 00:15:22,254 --> 00:15:25,325 All right. Low and away. 235 00:15:25,424 --> 00:15:27,860 - Uuh! - Ooh! Ouch! 236 00:15:30,998 --> 00:15:32,966 [ Moaning ] 237 00:15:33,066 --> 00:15:37,504 Okay, try it again. But this time, keep your eye off the ball. 238 00:15:37,604 --> 00:15:39,471 You mean, keep your eye on the ball. 239 00:15:39,572 --> 00:15:41,975 Hey, lady, which one of us is in the Hall of Fame? 240 00:15:42,075 --> 00:15:45,878 - Psst! You're holding the bat upside down. - Just pitch the ball. 241 00:15:45,979 --> 00:15:48,880 Okay. Eye off the ball. 242 00:15:48,981 --> 00:15:51,683 Uuh! 243 00:15:51,783 --> 00:15:55,322 Stee-rike! Hooray! Yeah, you did it, Leela. 244 00:15:55,422 --> 00:15:57,690 [ Laughs ] I didn't hit the batter! 245 00:15:57,789 --> 00:16:00,692 For once I was pitching and not just belly itching. 246 00:16:00,793 --> 00:16:05,065 Oh, you got that too? I think there's a rash goin' around. 247 00:16:05,164 --> 00:16:07,167 ** [ Organ ] 248 00:16:09,302 --> 00:16:12,304 [ Low Groaning ] 249 00:16:12,404 --> 00:16:15,508 Welcome to Fenway Park, home of the Boston Poindexters, 250 00:16:15,607 --> 00:16:20,513 where the Mets close out a season that will rank among mankind's most awful crimes. 251 00:16:20,613 --> 00:16:22,715 [ Slurping ] 252 00:16:22,815 --> 00:16:24,917 Hey! You opened a franchise! 253 00:16:25,018 --> 00:16:28,988 Yes. Our biggest seller is Leela's bean pizza-- 254 00:16:29,088 --> 00:16:32,658 six kinds of beans, plus several things that look like beans. 255 00:16:32,759 --> 00:16:34,561 Beans, huh? 256 00:16:34,661 --> 00:16:38,730 Mmm, this is great! How do you make the crust so fizzy? 257 00:16:38,831 --> 00:16:42,034 Ah, ah, ah! Ancient Signoid secret. 258 00:16:42,134 --> 00:16:46,673 My husband. Some hotshot! Here's his ancient Signoid secret. 259 00:16:46,773 --> 00:16:51,077 Live hornets. We smoosh them right into dough. 260 00:16:51,177 --> 00:16:54,581 - Look, I don't care if there's horse manure in it. - That's-a good. 261 00:16:54,681 --> 00:16:58,585 I wanna buy this franchise. How does a hundred thousand dollars sound? 262 00:16:58,684 --> 00:17:02,621 Forget it-a! We come to Earth to make-a pizza, not-a money. 263 00:17:02,721 --> 00:17:06,459 No, Blek! Other way around. Oh, right. Offer accepted. 264 00:17:06,558 --> 00:17:09,695 [ Cheering, Laughing ] 265 00:17:09,796 --> 00:17:14,067 Well, fans, Boston's turning the last game of the season into a real squeaker, 266 00:17:14,166 --> 00:17:16,303 and that's with three E's. 267 00:17:16,403 --> 00:17:20,307 Two men on, and they're down to their last out. 268 00:17:20,406 --> 00:17:24,911 Come on, Skipper. It's my last chance to prove I'm not the worst player ever. 269 00:17:25,010 --> 00:17:28,780 Please put me in. No! We're actually winning this game. 270 00:17:28,881 --> 00:17:31,384 You only go in as a joke when we're eight runs behind, 271 00:17:31,483 --> 00:17:34,554 or when our other pitchers sneak out early to beat the traffic! 272 00:17:34,653 --> 00:17:38,325 Come on! Let's see some fundamentals out there! 273 00:17:38,424 --> 00:17:41,594 [ Horn Honking ] And not clown fundamentals! 274 00:17:43,329 --> 00:17:45,332 [ Crowd Cheering ] 275 00:17:47,467 --> 00:17:49,935 [ Grumbling ] 276 00:17:51,804 --> 00:17:56,643 Now the bases are loaded! Isn't there a man on this team who can get one more out? 277 00:17:56,742 --> 00:18:00,413 - I can! - I repeat: Isn't there a man on this-- 278 00:18:00,512 --> 00:18:02,582 I've been training with Hank Aaron. 279 00:18:02,682 --> 00:18:04,951 You've been training with the Hank Aaron? 280 00:18:05,050 --> 00:18:08,154 - I've been training with a Hank Aaron. - All right then. 281 00:18:08,255 --> 00:18:13,460 Get in there and pitch like you've never pitched like you before! 282 00:18:13,559 --> 00:18:17,329 [ Man On P.A. ] Now pitching for the Mets, Turanga Leela! 283 00:18:17,430 --> 00:18:19,699 - [ Crowd Cheering Wildly ] - Bean! Bean! 284 00:18:19,798 --> 00:18:22,134 - Bean! Bean! - Yea, Leela! 285 00:18:22,234 --> 00:18:24,103 [ Overlapping Chatter ] 286 00:18:24,203 --> 00:18:26,705 Go, Leela! Put it right down the pike! 287 00:18:26,806 --> 00:18:30,277 Strike him out, Leela! Do it for the hundreds of women everywhere! 288 00:18:30,376 --> 00:18:34,614 [ Crowd ] Bean! Bean! Bean! Bean! [ Man On P.A. ] Your attention. 289 00:18:34,713 --> 00:18:39,117 Now pinch-hitting for the Poindexters, Jackie Anderson! 290 00:18:39,219 --> 00:18:42,189 - [ All Exclaiming ] - Will ya look at that? 291 00:18:42,288 --> 00:18:45,991 College blernsball's finest female hitter making her big league debut... 292 00:18:46,092 --> 00:18:48,827 against pro ball's worst female anything. 293 00:18:48,927 --> 00:18:53,700 I've never seen anything this bizarre, and I've seen Mr. Belvedere naked. Whoo! 294 00:18:53,799 --> 00:18:56,702 Keep cool. She's just like any other player. 295 00:18:56,802 --> 00:18:59,239 She puts on her sports bra one arm at a time. 296 00:19:01,039 --> 00:19:03,476 Uuh! 297 00:19:03,576 --> 00:19:06,479 - Stee-rike one! - [ All Gasp ] 298 00:19:06,578 --> 00:19:09,415 [ Gasps ] Strike one! A personal best. 299 00:19:09,516 --> 00:19:11,417 Uuh! 300 00:19:11,518 --> 00:19:16,154 - Stee-rike two! - [ Crowd Gasps ] 301 00:19:16,256 --> 00:19:19,659 [ Uecker ] Remember, fans, this exciting moment is brought to you... 302 00:19:19,759 --> 00:19:22,862 by Month-old Franks, the hot dogs with experience. 303 00:19:22,961 --> 00:19:25,832 Mmm-mm! 304 00:19:37,876 --> 00:19:40,212 Mmm-uuh! 305 00:19:44,884 --> 00:19:47,019 Uuh-aah! 306 00:19:53,460 --> 00:19:55,862 - [ Fry Gasps ] - [ All Gasp ] 307 00:19:55,961 --> 00:19:58,631 [ Chuckles ] 308 00:19:58,730 --> 00:20:02,234 [ Bell Dings ] 309 00:20:02,335 --> 00:20:05,136 - [ Fireworks Exploding ] - [ Squeaking ] 310 00:20:09,476 --> 00:20:14,046 A grand slam blern! The Mets lose! Their season is over, 311 00:20:14,145 --> 00:20:18,317 and no question, Leela, the first woman ever to reach the majors, 312 00:20:18,417 --> 00:20:22,788 will go down as the single worst player in the history of blernsball. 313 00:20:22,888 --> 00:20:26,992 She's taught the world that being a bum knows no gender. 314 00:20:27,093 --> 00:20:30,630 [ Crowd Cheering ] And yet, tonight we have witnessed the beginning... 315 00:20:30,730 --> 00:20:34,066 of a great career for the first woman to play the sport well, 316 00:20:34,165 --> 00:20:36,134 Jackie Anderson. 317 00:20:38,805 --> 00:20:40,772 [ Sniffling ] 318 00:20:40,873 --> 00:20:44,576 Leela? Jackie. I guess you were right. 319 00:20:44,676 --> 00:20:47,279 I'm a lousy role model. I'm sorry. 320 00:20:47,380 --> 00:20:51,483 No, don't be. It turns out you were an inspiration after all. 321 00:20:51,584 --> 00:20:54,119 - I was? - Uh-huh. 322 00:20:54,220 --> 00:20:58,490 You were so awful that women everywhere set out to prove they don't stink as bad as you. 323 00:20:58,590 --> 00:21:02,961 You know, like a pig or somethin'. Oh, that's so kind of you. 324 00:21:03,061 --> 00:21:07,032 - I guess I made a difference after all. - You absolutely did, Leela. 325 00:21:07,133 --> 00:21:11,202 Now please, please retire immediately. 326 00:21:13,506 --> 00:21:15,642 Hey, kid. Catch. 327 00:21:15,741 --> 00:21:17,977 Wha-- Ohh! 328 00:21:23,549 --> 00:21:25,484 [ Sighs ] 329 00:21:25,585 --> 00:21:29,188 Well, at least you're still the worst football player of all time. 330 00:21:29,288 --> 00:21:32,491 Yeah, yeah.