Bye, Carla.
Thomas Porter, get off of that.
Ah, good morning. Jason, thank you for calling the auto club.
Good morning, Dr Tate. How are you?
- Dr Johnson. - Carla's ready to go.
She's just saying goodbye to all her friends. Very popular girl.
Very popular. Louise?
Carla? Carla, your father's here.
Pumpkin!
Ohh, Carla, come on.
You know, we talked about this. Now, you're ready to go home.
Right? You're ready to go home now.
She'll be fine. She'll be okay. You're ready. You can do it.
We're all so glad you're comin'home, pumpkin.
Heather flew in from New York, and Caroline came from school.
And Mom... Boy, she's just so excited.
She just keeps saying, "You get my Carla back here fast. "
Try these. I'm sorry the headset hurt your ears, but they don't come in sizes.
- How much longer before we land? - We're ahead of schedule.
We should be landing in about 15 minutes.
- Thank you. - Teeth okay?
Yes, they're okay.
Honey, I'd like the girls to come with me to the Palace of Fine Arts this weekend...
because there's this special exhibition...
Uh-uh, Carla. Oh, Carla, dear.
Can you please try to eat it with your fork, and that would be very... Carla.
With your fork. No, no, dear.
I said with the fork, not with the knife, dear.
All right. No, no. No more cake. No. No.
- Excuse me. - Carla?
No, no, what is the matter? Oh, my gosh. Oh, Car...
- Carla, you're... Radley. Radley. - No! No! It's my cake!
Please, come on. You're supposed to handle... Please, Radley. Radley.
- Leave me alone! - Carla. Carla.
- What the hell do they know? - They are experts, and she has all the symptoms.
- She has an I. Q bordering on 2nd grade. - I know about...
- I know a few things about experts. - She has... She has significant social adjustment problems.
- And now her school... - I'm sorry. Where's my drink? - What's the matter? What?
Oh, your drink. It's right there.
And now this school, her regular school won't even take her back.
- What about that, Radley? - Ah, I need another drink.
Forget the drink, Radley!
Now listen to me. We need to talk about Carla. Do you understand?
- She is beautiful! - We have got to! - Have you looked at her?
- She is gorgeous. - She nearly burned the house down with the other two girls in it.
- Radley, we can't do this. - That... That was an accident.
- You know that was an accident. - It was not. We can't keep saying things like that.
We can't keep saying, "Carla is a slow learner. Carla will blossom. "
Because those are lies. Now, Radley, we have to do something.
We have to make a decision. This is a special school in Santa Barbara.
- All right, back up just... The school... - It is for the mentally challenged.
- Right there. - Yes, what? - Now, they don't allow adults and the parents to go visit them. They...
They have limited... limited visitation, and let me tell you something, Radley.
- If it doesn't work out, she doesn't have to be there. - I don't...
- I don't want her to be retarded. - Of course you don't.
Of course you don't. I understand completely.
We have to send her there, Radley. We don't have a choice. All right?
- Sign it. - How are you two doing here? Can I get you anything?
Can I get you anything?
Uh, no, I've got water, and, uh... Ah.
We ordered a vegetarian worm. No?
- I'll see if I can find one in coach. - I would appreciate that.
I'd like to be the first to welcome you to San Francisco International Airport.
It's currently 54 degrees in the Bay Area...
and a beautiful, clear day.
Thank you for choosing to fly with us.
She's here! She's home. Mrs Tate!
Come on.
All right. Okay. Heather! Hang up!
She's home!
That call was important...
and you yelling in the background is not exactly good for business.
- I'm sorry. - Here we are.
Ladies and gentlemen, the homecoming queen, Carla Tate.
We're all waiting for you. Come on, honey.
Bring Tickles. Come on.
Oh. Ohh, hello, Carla.
- Welcome home. G... Hello. Hello. - Here. I'll take this.
Uh, would you like some help with that, sir?
- Hi, Carla! Welcome home. - Oh, Carla, it's so good to have you home.
- Thanks. Say hello to Carla. - We missed you, Carla.
- Who's that? - Uh... Oh, well, um...
This is Jeff Reed.
And, actually, Carla, I have kind of a surprise for you because...
we're engaged to be married.
Ooh, yea!
Well, let me take your coat, dear. All right?
- No! - Oh. You sure? You don't want...
All right, fine. Just...
Dr Johnson said that it would be nice...
if I got everybody presents.
- Oh! - And I thought so too.
Well, thank you, Carla.
- It's, uh... It's necklaces. - Oh!
- And they're beautiful. - Carla!
- Say cheese! - Winnie!
- Welcome home! - I missed you! - It's so good to see you!
Sweetheart!
We were thinking that maybe we would just like to elope, you know?
- That's very funny, but not hysterical. All right? - Okay!
We're gonna have a big wedding ceremony at the church.
- And the wedding... - I know. We're gonna have the wedding reception at the club.
- You remember the club, don't you, Carla dear? - Yeah!
You know what. You could just put this in your lap. That's good. That's very nice that way.
You look very grown up. So I hear you and Jeff settled on a honeymoon spot.
Did you two do it yet?
- No. Caroline. - She's gonna spit it out. I can see it.
Sex is something that we talk about in private, I think. Am I right?
No, but my teacher at the school says...
that two people do it when they're in love.
Well, I'm sorry, but I'm sure she meant that you do it after, you know, you're married or something.
Definitely.
And then you don't talk about it ever again in your whole life.
- Winnie. - A special dessert for Carla.
- Oh, boy. - Please.
- That's nice. - So a doctorate, Jeff? That is so refreshing.
So what is your doctorate dissertation gonna be on?
Um, multi-tiered financing of petrol chemical surveys...
in an uncertain political terrain.
Translation: Finding the big bucks in tiny little countries whose names you can't pronounce.
Wow!
I mean, it's so good to hear someone's actually using their college education.
Come on. You know, I'm not teaching second grade because I happen to like children.
You know, I think that they're the hope of the world.
Of course they're the hope of the world, but, really, isn't it just as noble...
to be a college professor and earn four times the money?
- Mother! - You know what. Daddy, will you make a toast right now?
I'd gladly make a toast, yeah. To the Tate family and its good...
- I want to go to school also. - That's great.
Well, dear, you just completed school. And, in fact, I think they gave you a certificate of completion, didn't they?
I am gonna be a veterinarian's assistant.
- Wow! - And, but to do that, I need a high school diploma.
I think the best thing for right now would be just to have a nice, big, long vacation...
and we'll explore your options later.
- Okay. To the Ta... - I would like to explore my options now, Mother.
Carla, we're all just a little bit too tired for such an important conversation.
So, Radley...
To the Tate family, all of us together again.
Follow me. Hurry.
- Just follow me. - Stop it.
Stop following me.
I can't, stupid.
- Stop it! - I told you, I can't, stupid.
Stop laughing at me!
Oh, my goodness! Are you all right?
- Carla! - Yeah.
All right. Now, I want you to close your eyes. Close your eyes.
Okay, Carla. All right.
- No, stop, stop. Stop. - Yeah.
You can stop. Good girl. Open your eyes. Surprise. Do you...
What do you think? You think... Do you like it?
- You gave my room to somebody else? - No!
I redecorated it for you, dear. I just changed it a little.
- But where is my tea party table that was right here? - Who did this?
Well, Carla, those are little-girl things, and you're a young woman now.
Remember, downstairs you were talking about taking on more responsibility.
- Well, this is... - I want my things.
Carla, I really think that you should live with these things for a while...
and you'll see, I'm sure that you will grow to like them very much.
And, anyway, Dr Johnson said that, uh, that these are your favourite colours.
Uh, you like red, don't you? Where...
Carla, wh... Why are your eyes closed?
I'm remembering my old room.
Ohh! Heather?
Heather!
Bye.
I'm really sorry we didn't visit you more frequently...
but I got a job in New York, and Caroline went to college.
- So... - Yeah, but that's okay 'cause sometimes...
we thought that the visits sometimes upset the parents...
more than it made the kids happy.
Well, we're sorry, Carla.
But I liked all your letters that you wrote, Heather.
They were better than Caroline's...
'cause she mostly drew pictures.
- What? - Honey, I think you just...
She's overwhelmed by all of this.
Now, why don't you just relax? You did great, okay?
Just don't be so hard on yourself.
Radley, I'm gonna make it up to that girl.
I really am.
Winnie!
Your mother said another 15 minutes.
Did you tell her that I don't like tennis still?
She said that all well-bred girls play tennis...
chess or bridge.
Oh.
Is it 15 minutes yet?
- We'll look at that. We'll look at that right... - Hello, Mrs Tate.
- How are you? - Oh, Victoria, you look so lovely. - Thank you.
I'd like you to meet my daughter. This is Carla.
- Hello, Carla. - Hello.
Didn't your other daughter, Heather, get married?
- No, no. Actually, it's, uh, Caroline is engaged. - Oh!
But anyway, I want to see a couple of sweater sets.
- And, Carla, come on. - That's a very nice shirt, Mom.
Very beautiful feet. Nice toes.
And the sock really accentuates your feet.
You know that the, uh, the Chinese say...
that the toes are the windows to the soul?
- They do? - I've been to Hong Kong several times, and I've never heard that.
Why don't you just, uh, enlighten us with your knowledge of shoes?
- Do you have this in a size eight? - She's a little uptight, isn't she?
- What? - It's tight. This shoe's a little tight.
It'll... Here. How 'bout these? These red ones here.
- Yes, this is a fun shoe, Mom. - I don't think so. Thank you very much.
What about these with the heels? Remember the leather?
- This is hip. Hip. - Those are not what we want. Thank you so much.
Mothers are always right.
And today the dogs are here to be seen...
in the hopes that they'll be adopted by the nice people of Sutter Hills.
- And I'm a friend of your mother's. - And so, thank you from me...
You know that your mother was the one who made this animal rescue shelter a possibility.
- No. I didn't... - Yes, and she did a lot of other things in Sutter Hills.
- You're too kind. - The youth orchestra, the theatre, the library.
- Wow. - And today your mother's gonna get some recognition, which she deserves.
My job to introduce the head of our Sutter Hills City Council...
- Drew Edison. - Excuse me. - Oh, sure. Of course.
Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen.
There are so many people to thank for this wonderful shelter.
- Hello, puppy. - And they used every... - Carla, please.
- Fund-raising device known to man... - Hello, puppy.
From a, a bake sale in my mother... Pucky Ryan's... garden.
Carla, please don't do that. Please. You're disrupting.
- ... country club. - Woof!
- Woof! Woof! - Carla.
Elizabeth. Elizabeth, your daughter is barking.
- Carla! - Woof!
- Elizabeth, now they're all barking. - I know.
- Carla, dear. Carla. Carla! - Oh, I'll quiet them, Mom. They like me.
- Carla, Carla! - Hello, puppies. I'll teach you how to behave, little puppies.
Stay! No, go, go, go.
- No! - Come back in the cage. Come on.
Behave! Mom!
It was so embarrassing, Radley.
I feel like... I feel like I try all these things, and nothing works.
I've been doing my best to have fun with her, but I don't know what fun for her is.
And she won't even tell me.
Honestly, I just want to quit.
Mrs Tate! Mrs Tate! Carla's run away!
When the police picked her up, she gave them another name...
and listed this as her home address, so they threw her back here.
- Here's the police report. - Did she really say that I'm smothering her?
In so many words. Yeah. Do you want to read the police report?
I just want you to know that I don't understand any of this, not for one second.
I give her love, I protect her, I teach her, and suddenly that's smothering.
Those are her words, not mine, Mrs Tate.
Did she tell you that I took her to the pet shelter so she could possibly get a job?
Yes, and we agreed it ended badly. Could you... Could you not?
- That's a hand-carved Indian relic. - I'm sorry.
I also enrolled her in a calligraphy class, an origami class.
- And I, I even got her into that... - She doesn't want to do those things.
They... They don't interest her. They don't work for her.
- Maybe Carla doesn't know what works for her. - And you do.
I think so. I'm her mother.
That's why she tried to hitchhike over 200 miles to get back here?
- Would she do that again? - I believe she will, yes.
If things continue at home the way they've been going, yes, absolutely yes.
And we were lucky this time. She came back here.
A lot of kids run away, we never hear from them again.
This is a girl who is determined to push the edge of the envelope.
And I, for one, I like the fact that she never quits.
Specifically, she wants to attend this, uh, uh, Bay Area Polytech.
A public vocational school? Is that what you're talking about?
They do welding there. She can't possibly keep up with that.
- And she's going to be humiliated by those people there. - You don't know they're going to humiliate her.
- Of course they're going to humiliate her! - Please...
They... They did it when she was young. L...
She's got to have the opportunity to meet challenges.
I mean, do you want the... do you want the kid to remain a child the rest of her life...
or do you want to let her grow into an adult and take the same risks that you and I take?
I want her to take risks. It's the kind of ri... Are you a parent?
Uh, no, not yet, no, no, but I have worked with children...
including yours, for ten years.
Y... You think she should go to school and be on her own?
Independence can give Carla something...
that you and I will never be able to give her.
- Dignity. - What?
- Dignity. - Dignity.
- To the left. - Thanks a lot. - Okay, honey, here we are now.
- Uh, you sure you don't want me to walk you in? - No, Dad, I'm not... I'm fine.
Come on, man. You got to remember to lock your bike up, man.
Your mama's gettin' tired of buyin' you bikes.
Citizenship test?
The courses are English, History and Political Science.
Mmm. Hey, new girl. You lookin' to score, huh?
Hey, send me some vibes, wolf eyes.
Yo, mama. Welcome to the party.
Hey, don't run, baby doll. Don't run.
Where are you goin'?
- Oh, yeah, baby. Oop! She's got the pepper spray! - She definitely has the pepper spray!
- She's packing now. - Go on through, wolf eyes.
Go on through.
- I have everything you need to get started, I do hope. - Next.
- Hi, my name is Carla Tate. - Nice to meet you.
- Uh, you're taking Computer 101. - Yeah.
- That's okay, isn't it? - The only requirement at Polytechnic is that you pay.
That's fine enough. Here's your receipt. You're registered.
Thank you very much.
Next. Hello! Let's keep the line moving, please.
- But he's next. - So?
- He doesn't know it. Look at him. - You're kidding me?
- He's asleep. - That class is closed? It'll take an extra semester.
You're next in line.
Oh. Uh...
Ow! Watch what you're doing! What is the matter with you?
- Uh, he's a retard. - Oh, and that's supposed to be my problem?
- He nearly broke my toe. - Hey, special boy, why don't you get back on the short bus?
Hey, don't talk like that. Be nice.
Hi, little puppy! Hello, puppy.
No, no, don't touch. He's not for petting. He's for drug sniffing.
- He's on a break. - Okay. Sorry.
Well, hello, ladies. How are you doin'?
Oh, Mr Taylor, hi!
I just have to tell you this is the best computer class I have ever taken.
- Well, looks like you're doing just fine. - And it is such thanks to you.
Before I came to this class, I just didn't even know the difference...
between, like, a ROM or a RAM or a bit or a byte.
So, um, I don't know if you're interested or not...
but, um, do you give private lessons?
Uh, well, no, not really.
- I'm gonna stay right here. - Okay.
- So how 'bout you, Carla? - What?
How are you doing?
Well, I-I know the difference between a bit and a byte.
Okay. Well, you keep up the good work.
- Thanks. - I'll be back if you need me.
- He's kind of cute, huh? - Uh, yeah.
And how are you doing over here, Mr Garbis?
Hi.
Do you give private lessons?
- Hi, pumpkin. - Oh.
I brought some of that nice brewed tea you like.
Yeah. You just put it right by the bed, Dad.
I'll do that. And I'll leave you all alone so you can do your homework.
- Okay? - Okay.
- Good night.
Good night, pumpkin.
Come on, Danny. Here we go. Hold on one second. Let me put it down.
- You're really strong, Rachel. - Yeah, Danny, thanks.
Watch it.
L- I'll see you later, Rachel!
- Hi! - Hi.
Hi. My name's Daniel McMahon.
I know. I asked someone what your name was.
My name is Carla Tate.
Hello, Carla Tate.
Thank you for helping me the other day with re... with registration.
It was really confusing.
Yeah, I know.
You're welcome. Okay, bye.
Yeah, thank...
Where are you going right now, Carla Tate?
I have to go phone my father to come pick me up...
because I got out of school early today.
- Well, okay. - Do you... You wanna... You wanna get a soda and something to eat first?
L... 'Cause I know the greatest place, and I can drive.
Well!
Is this a date?
No, it's just getting sodas and something to eat.
Good. 'Cause I don't want to date yet.
Look at the buses. Watch 'em.
Why? What are they gonna do?
They pull in, and then they pull out, and they turn...
and they back up.
I went... I went to a regular school.
I went for a long, long, long time. Hi!
L- I finally quit when I grew a moustache...
'cause I looked older than the teachers.
Stop it. I don't like when people laugh at me.
No, I wasn't laughing at you. I was just making a joke.
- Oh. - T-This is the Falcon Bar.
And this is where all the bus people come.
- "Free tids and bits"? - You can eat till you burst.
Sometimes I-I mess up on my allowance...
and then... and then I- I just come here.
Um, a-a-and I can eat all I want.
You see that girl over there?
Don't ever play pool with her 'cause she'll beat you.
They call her the Black Widow.
She has really long hair.
L- I-I like short hair.
It's easy. You just... You just get on, and you give them a ticket.
But what if you take the wrong bus?
Uh, th-the driver just throws you off.
See, okay, I been on... I been on most of these buses...
and I been... I been thrown off most of them too.
You must like taking bus rides, Daniel.
Uh, no. Well, no, 'cause I... 'cause I...
I- I gotta take the buses to see, uh...
to see marching bands at the college football games.
Th... um, this one takes me to UCLA, Stanford...
and th-this one takes you...
- Hi, Francis. - Danny.
This one takes me to Western Pacific State.
Well, you must really like marching bands then.
Yeah. Yeah, I love marching bands.
L- I even got a job working with one.
Here. You can sit here right there...
'cause this is where I usually sit when I'm waiting for buses.
Okay.
And I-I usually sit there, but it's usually empty.
If it... If it was empty, I could... I could sit next to you.
Thank you, sir.
Bus 45, express service to Sacramento...
Wow. Daniel, you have a job?
- Yes. - Wow!
How much does it pay?
- Nothing. - Nothing?
Well, uh, I get... I get... I get to keep... keep lots of marshmallows.
Your job pays you in marshmallows?
Well, during... Okay.
Well, during the games, the students throw marshmallows onto the field...
and they... and they try to get them into the tubas.
You know, they think it's fun and stuff.
And then... And then on Mondays, um, uh, I get... I get to clean out the tubas.
I love marshmallows. I like the way they taste.
What are you... What are you writing down?
Oh, I'm just writing things down about different jobs...
because someday I'm gonna have a job, too...
and I need to be responsible...
so that my parents get off my back.
4:30 bus to Las Vegas is now departing.
I have to go back because my father is coming.
He'll come and pick me up. Oh.
I shouldn't have come with you, Daniel...
but you have a really nice smile.
L... I-I-I also got a job that pays money.
- Really? - I bake cookies at Emil's Bakery.
I got a cookie maker's hat and everything.
- It's very high. - Commuter service to Sausalito, Marin City...
Alone? You live all by yourself alone, Danny?
- Yeah, all by myself in my own apartment. - I could never do that.
- Yes, you could. - I could?
Yeah, sure. It's great.
You can come and go whenever you want...
and you can stay up as late as you want, and you can watch TV.
- Really? - You can walk around in the apartment...
in your underwear, if you want.
But could I have a pet too?
Oh, definitely. Definitely.
I have to call my father now.
I don't have to call my father.
They put gum in my hat again.
Happy birthday to you
- Happy birthday, dear Carla - So high...
Happy birthday to you
- Oh, that was so good. - And many more - I have to make a wish.
Yes, all right. All right. Make a...
- Happy 22nd, Carla. - Yeah!
Thank you for coming back for my birthday.
Are you kidding? We wouldn't miss this for the world.
Yeah, Winnie tells me that, uh, Carla bought groceries for the family this week...
and she did some of the cooking too, right, Winnie?
And she helped me do all my laundry that I brought from school.
- Yeah. And I recycled all the garbage, Mother. - I know.
Well, I mean, someday you'll be able to take care of this house without me. That's for sure.
Not this house.
Maybe one day I'll be able to take care of my own apartment...
like some of the kids at school do.
- Oh, Carla, you don't know what you're saying. - Yes, I do.
No, we can't discuss this right now, all right? Open these presents.
- Here. There. - But...
Thank you, Radley. Here you go, dear. There.
- "Carla. " It's from... - Excuse me now.
- I have to go feed my fish. - Oh.
- Mother, why did you do that? - Aw, Mom. - What did I do?
I mean, maybe she's ready for her own apartment.
You know, a lot of the new books out right now...
you know, they... they advocate disabled people living on their own.
- What are we movin' the presents for? - Why don't we just take a vote? - Yeah, voting's nice.
- Oh, a family meeting. - Yes! A family meeting.
We haven't had a family meeting in ages. I would love to try it.
I think we should just forget this, because I just want to say something.
This is not a political referendum. This is a child's life.
And this is my child's life. Carla's not ready for an apartment.
And really, she may never be ready for an apartment. My God!
What if there were a fire? What if there was a burglar?
- Well, that can happen to anyone, honey. - "What if?" - No, but not with Carla.
She can't handle the unexpected, Radley. You know that.
Mother, I think that she has tried very hard to show that she's a responsible person.
- Heather! - She's capable.
You don't live here any more, so you don't vote!
Mom, why don't you think of it this way, as a...
Oh, look, Caroline, you and Jeffrey can raise your children any way you want to raise them, but this is my child!
- All right. All right. Ease up. - You know something? I don't know what you're trying to do.
I don't know what you're trying to prove by refuting every single thing I say.
- I'm not refuting everything you say! - I didn't want to put her in that place!
But I had to. I had no other choice.
She needed professional help.
Now it is Carla's turn, and I am going to protect her!
And nobody's going to tell me how to do it, not even you, Radley. No!
Girls, inside, please.
- I guess we'll be forever 10 and 12. - Marcia and Jan.
- Don't you understand what I'm trying to say? - Elizabeth, shut the hell up.
- It means a lot to me... - Do not...
Do not speak to me that way in front of the children.
And we are both responsible for putting Carla in that place.
You went along with it because you were too drunk to face it.
I made that decision by myself!
I wasn't drinking when I picked her up, and I haven't had a drink...
since that family meeting 8 years, 4 months and 11 days ago!
That is not the... That is not the same...
It is the same family. Damn it! Our family, Elizabeth!
- Excuse me. - Oh.
Dinner will be served soon.
I'll skip dinner.
- Permission to come aboard? - Permission granted.
I don't know what's the matter with me. I just... I...
Anyway, I never meant to insinuate anything against you.
Maybe we should just trust Carla.
But it's not just trusting Carla. I really don't think so.
I think it's everybody. It's everything out there. It's the...
Well, she can live near us. That way we can keep an eye on her.
She just got back. Does she have to leave so soon?
Not like you planned, huh?
No. Mm-mmm. Mm-mmm.
Is anybody coming to dinner, or are we voting on what's being served?
What?
What is...
- Well... - Hot roll or baguette?
I think I will have a hot roll... Oh, come on, please.
This is just absurd.
This is not a casual decision, and Carla is not like other girls.
But I don't want to be the one who always says no to her. I really don't.
So I'm gonna try and see it your way. I'm gonna try and see...
- Oh! - I am so happy, Mama!
- This is so great! - Carla? This is...
- You could come and help me pick an apartment out... - Not quite so hard to Mom. Okay.
- And everything. - All right, maybe we will. Maybe I could do that.
I could call up Gibson Realty. We could have them, you know, get a couple of videos.
- Dear, that is my... Oh, dear. - Mom, this is the best...
- birthday present I've ever had. - Please don't do that.
I'm thrilled. Is everybody happy?
Bye!
- Bye, Daniel! Bye! - Bye!
- Bye, Daniel! - Bye!
Bye, Carla!
Bye. L-I'll see you tomorrow. Goodbye.
So who's the fella? Is he kind of a sweetheart?
No, that's my friend Daniel.
Um, but I like to call him Danny.
Danny. Well, Danny's kind of cute.
Stop teasing, Dad!
Carla, this way. Uh, your father mentioned that you met a young man.
Yeah, that's Daniel.
But I told Dad that he was just a "friend" friend, not a boyfriend.
Darling, don't sit there! It's just wet.
No, it isn't, Mom. It's dry.
It's dry, Mom.
Well, Carla, you're going to be getting this apartment...
and I'm sure you're gonna want to have visitors come over...
and I'm sure that some of these visitors are going to be...
well, they're going to be young men.
Mom, is this a sex talk?
No.
Well, yes. Is that okay?
- Okay. - All right. Okay.
Well, then I know that recently you mentioned, um...
doing it...
and I just wanted to know if you really know what that means.
Yeah, that's what Thomas Porter calls it.
And Mrs Matthews, the health teacher and the cafeteria monitor...
she called it coitus.
- And she also told us about penis... - Okay, we've got it.
- And vulva. - Shh. Carla. Just a little less loud, okay?
- And then she was telling us all about semen... - Carla, honey.
And how there's 50 billion sperms in one shot, and that...
No, no, no. We do have the... We have the...
- Yeah, yeah. All right. That's very good. No, no. - I know all about it.
You know all about it. I understand that. You know all about reproduction. That's excellent. Good.
Yeah, and she also told me...
that people like us...
they... boys can try to take advantage...
and that they'll try to coitus us.
So if that should ever happen, to say, "No!
- Oh. Okay. - Stop right there!"
Good. And that's excellent advice. What else did she say to you?
"Don't put gum under the cafeteria table!
How many times do I have to tell you?"
She's teaching you a lot of variety there.
Anyway, dear, with this apartment, I just don't think that you should have, um...
any boyfriends over for a while, all right?
- Is that okay with you? - But, Mom...
what if I want to go visit...
at someone else's apartment?
Well, in that case, you remember "No, stop. "
And you don't forget your pepper spray.
- Whose apartment might you be visiting, Carla? - Nobody's.
I was just saying what if. I'm gonna go feed the birds.
Okay. Oh, geez.
No, Carla, wait! Get away from the water.
Hello, duckies.
- Come here, duckies. - Carla!
- I want to live - Like animals
- Careless and free - Like animals
- I want to live - Uh, excuse me, sir.
Does this bus go to La Pine Street?
Nah, this is the eastbound. You want the westbound over there.
But I took four buses already.
- I don't know what to tell you, but that bus will take you there. - Okay.
Thank you very much.
It's so confusing There's so many rules to follow
But I don't feel it
'Cause I just run away in my mind
Ohh-ohh
- I want to live - Like animals
- Careless and free - Like animals
I want to live
I want to run through thejungle The wind in my hair
And the sand at my feet
Daniel!
- Hey! - Hi.
You found it!
And... And these are my CDs.
Would you have any blues? My friend and I at my school, we love the blues.
I like, like Muddy Waters and Billie Holiday.
- She's dead, you know. - Yeah.
Yeah. I like that one song where she sings...
I'm gonna love you
Like nobody's loved you
Come rain or come shine
No, but I-I have marching bands.
L- I-I have marching bands from all over the world.
From Scotland and from Russia.
But do you have the one song that goes...
- I'm gonna love you - No blues!
- I'll... Okay, I'll... I'll play you my favourite one now, okay? - Like nobody's
Loved you
Come...
W- Watch. Watch this. Watch this.
You're gonna wake... You're gonna wake Mrs Waters' baby.
I've told you time and time again, don't play the music so loud.
- Okay, okay. S- Sometimes I forget, Ernie. - Yeah.
- Who are you? - This is... This is Ernie. He's a painter.
- And he... he's a, a musician. - Well...
I'm an art, painting, music and volume control manager.
- Yeah. - I'm sorry. I didn't know you were entertaining a lady.
No, Ernie, this is... this is Carla. She's... She's my friend.
My name is Carla Tate.
Thanks for calling me a lady.
Mrs Tate, I want you to bear in mind that all the apartments that I'm gonna be showing you in the video are...
Winnie, where's Carla? She should be here. She should see this.
Oh, she phoned to say she's going to be a little late.
- She's studying with friends. - Really?
Now, remember, this is tape number two.
- Now, Mrs Tate, it's a little small. Kitchen. - No, this is out of the question.
No, I don't like it.
- I agree. - No, next, okay?
- Oh, Ernie... - Yeah?
- Uh, did my dad send a cheque... - Oh, yeah, yeah. - For, for my allowance?
- Hold on. Here. That's right. I forgot. - Okay.
- I got two leaky sinks here. Here. - Okay.
Paid your bills. Here's your allowance.
Don't spend it all on the first date, all right?
- Yeah, my... my dad sells Mercedes. Yeah. - Right. Okay.
- All right? All right. - Okay. Bye!
- Bye. - Okay! - Bye now!
Ernie has killed people.
What?
He was in Vietnam.
He doesn't like to talk about it, but he talks to me about it.
And he lives down in the basement all alone.
- What I really like is the kitchen. - Yeah, isn't that beautiful?
- It's sweet. - You know, and a lot of the owners don't like to rent to people like Carla.
- And knowing that... - I'm sorry. Would you wait one second?
- Well, I mean, not don't like to... - I'm sorry, but there are no people like Carla, okay?
- She happens to be a very unique young woman. - Okay.
Okay. Of course she is, but they just wanna know...
if the unique young woman is gonna leave the gas on...
or if she's gonna leave the door unlocked.
This is them asking, not me. Is she reliable?
Well, of course she's reliable. I mean, this is her first apartment, though.
I mean, I can't vouch for the fact that the window might not be left open during a rainstorm...
but what mother can vouch for that?
Look, I understand what their concerns are, but let me tell you something right now, okay?
My daughter happens to be a very amazing person.
She's tough, and she is adamant to be on her own.
She's gonna be just fine.
Now, if there's any sort of a problem, I am only 15 minutes away.
- You think that's gonna be enough for them? - It's enough for me.
All right. Thank you. Let's watch it.
No! She can't marry that guy, Daniel.
I want her to marry Dustin Hoffman.
Yeah. Okay. Okay, wait just a second.
Elaine!
- Elaine! - Whoa-oh!
Yeah!
- Yeah. - Do they live happily ever after, Daniel?
Well, I don't know. I don't know. They didn't make a Graduate 2.
- Oh, wow! - Yeah.
That was a great movie, Daniel. I'm so happy you let me watch it.
I would have never seen it had you not asked me to see it.
Carla, do you... do you wanna be my friend?
- I am your friend. - No, no, no. L-I... No, I don't...
I like that one part where he's trying to get away from his parents.
I don't mean "friend" friend. I mean boy-girlfriend.
Are you getting the pepper spray?
No. I'm thinking.
Okay.
One bedroom, one bathroom, hardwood floors...
- eat-in kitchen, working fireplace. - That is good.
- I knew it. I knew it. - This... I love those Georg...
That's a Georgian window, Mrs Tate. That's a classic. That's a San Francisco classic.
Hi, Daniel.
Hi!
Mr Vitello, s-she's my friend. She's my friend.
- Wh-What are you doing here? - I came to tell you the best news.
Wh-Wh... What's that? What's that?
I got my own apartment, my very own apartment.
Nobody lives there but me, and I move there in two weeks!
Hurray! Hurray! Hurray!
Sorry, Mr Vitello. Sorry.
See, not a marshmallow in the bunch.
Okay, okay, okay, see that guy right there?
That's my friend, and he's... he's a bandmaster.
And see that guy right there with the big baton?
That guy's name is Wally Williams...
and, and, and he's a drum major, and they, they, they call him Walkin' Wally.
- Why? - I don't know.
All right, perfect. Once again from the top.
- Hi, everybody! - Hey, Danny.
- Hi. - Hey, Danny. Uh, how's it goin'?
- Good. - I wasn't expecting to see you till Monday.
Uh... Yeah, just 'cause... just 'cause I wanted... I wanted to bring Carla in...
so that she could see where I work.
- Hi, Carla. - Hey, Carla. - She... She's my girlfriend.
Ohh!
No, I... They're not laughing at you.
You just missed marching band rehearsal, and right now we're working with the Dixieland band.
Ohh.
But you know what? I was just talking to Wally.
And we decided it would be great to hear the band from the audience.
Wow, Carla. A new boyfriend.
- And now a dance? - Yeah. The dance is this Friday.
- Mm, that's exciting. - Well, I was just calling, Heather...
because I wanted to tell you the good news...
and I want to look special, with nice make-up on...
and I don't think I could do it myself.
Just go to the mall. They have lots of make-over places there.
- You know, they'll just do it for you or show you how. - Really?
- Free make-over demonstration over here. - Really?
- We can do wonders for you, I promise. - Good. Thanks.
- Hi, miss. We're having a free make-over demonstration. - No, thank you.
- Free make-overs. - Oh, it's free?
Wow. But over there, it's 35.
- But it's free over there. - Thank you.
And smile. Perfect! Beautiful.
Now, this is the new you.
The old you.
Good.
Not so good.
Okay. Anyone else for a free make-over demonstration?
But when are you gonna do the rest of my face?
This is a demonstration, and this demonstration was absolutely free.
Oh, but how much is it to buy the other half of my face?
About $50.
- But I don't have $50. - Oh.
Well, then I'm afraid I'm gonna have to take the next customer then, so if you could just move aside.
But you didn't say anything about $50 before.
Come on. Everybody knows the whole thing isn't free.
- But that's not fair. - Life isn't fair.
Okay, if you'll just step aside. Thank you so much for coming in.
- That's not fair. - Bye-bye now.
Next.
Well, you walk right in
And you walk right out, hmm
You walk right in there
Walk right out
Well, my baby keeps on walkin'
All she want to do is walk right in, yeah
She walk right out
She walks right in there
She walks right out
- Happy Halloween. - Hi.
There's just too many people out there who'll take advantage of you.
I don't think you should go to the dance.
- Mother! - What?
- I have to go to the dance. - Well...
- You said I could. - I know, I know. Okay, okay.
Can you do a whole new make-up?
No, I won't do that, Carla. Now, you have such a lovely face.
You don't need all that make-up. No.
- Well... - What?
How about if you taught me how to dance?
Wow, Mom!
I feel the earth move under my feet
- But I can't do that with my arms. - Yes, you can.
Look at me. It's very simple.
I feel my heart start to tremblin'
- Whenever you're around - I feel the earth
Thomas Porter, at my school, he used to go like this.
- Oh, no, no, Carla. Stop. No, no, don't. No, Carla. - And then the teacher would come and...
- All right. - Darling, just don't move your hips like that.
Don't do this. Don't do that. Just keep it calm down there. That's right.
Give me your hand.
- Okay. - Whoo! - Wow!
And then the dip thing!
Oh, dear! I'm terrible!
You're funny, Mom!
Oh, my baby. I love you.
- I love you. - You're silly.
You're silly. Oh, dear. Oh, dear, what's the matter with me?
- Wow. - What's the matter with... I might be having a breakdown.
- But, Mom... - Oh, dear.
I have to learn my slow dances too.
No, but slow dances, dear, they're...
they're a bit of a problem because you don't want to get too close, you really don't.
You want to keep time to the music.
Want to do it
- Stand up and I'll show you how you do it. You just sort of... - Yeah.
You made me want you
- And all the time you knew it - All the time you knew it
- Yeah. Well, all the movies I've s-seen, Mom, they all... - I guess you always knew it
- It's slow, like this. - No, no. I don't think so, Carla.
When they start to play a slow song, I think what might be best is...
you and your partner should immediately go and get yourselves a soda.
- That might be nice. - But there were times
Dear
Happy Halloween, Dad!
Look what Winnie made me.
My pumpkin's a duck.
- No, I'm a swan. - Oh, yeah, a swan. Of course. You...
I feel so delicate.
Oh, honey, well, you have always been delicate to me...
and you were always beautiful.
What is it? What... Ohh!
- Oh, look at you! - Careful.
- It's Swan Lake. - Yeah.
Oh, you're beautiful. Now, Carla, let me just take that off.
'Cause I don't think that's gonna fit in the back seat of the car.
And, Radley, you'd better get going, otherwise you're gonna be late.
Oh, wait! Oh, wait just one minute.
- My, uh, boyfriend is coming... - Here...
- and he's gonna go with us. - Boyfriend?
Don't make that face, Mom. He's very nice.
- He has two jobs, Mom. - What kind of jobs does he have, Carla?
- Well, he wor... One w... He works at the bakery. - The bakery.
And then the other one is, he's a music... works in the music department at the university.
- I don't know... - That's nice.
- Oh! That's him! - L... I... - Radley, come here just one moment.
- Do you believe this? - What?
This guy has the nerve to come to our very own home.
- I mean, what does he want with her anyway? - Honey, she's a very attractive girl.
- She's very pretty anyway, and he just... - I'll tell you what he wants. He wants to have his way with her. That's what he wants.
Hi, Daniel.
- Hi. You look really pretty. - Thank you.
This is my idea of a nightmare.
Mom!
- I want you to meet Daniel. - Oh.
And Daniel, this is my mother and my father.
Hello... Ohh!
What is... What?
- Give me your paw, Daniel. - Hello.
- It's very nice to meet you. - Look, do, uh...
- Do you have a head? You know, a head. - Sorry.
I did... I didn't...
Oh, he's the boy at school. Yes, well, I'm gonna find my car keys.
Don't worry, 'cause I've been house-trained.
- That's a joke, Mom. - You're gonna have a wonderful time tonight.
- Okay! - Yeah. - Sure. - Sure, dear.
- So, that's an excellent costume you picked out there. - Goodbye.
- You don't wanna miss that party. - What's that right there? - Oh.
- Trick or treat! - My dad gives these instead of candy.
Oh! Up and down, and not across.
- Thank you! Okay. - Bye, Carla.
- Bye, Mom. - Bye. - Bye. - Be good.
- Oh, dear. - Well...
I am not the person who is singing
I am the silent one inside
I am not the one who laughs at people's jokes
We're not responsible for lost items...
so please make sure you pick up your wings and your antlers.
Also, for those interested...
the first-quarter grades are posted downstairs on the bulletin board.
Who's next?
I want to see if I passed.
- Come on, Daniel. - Um, well, o-okay.
She said it was downstairs.
He who makes the monsters
He who strips my confidence
I passed it.
I passed it, Daniel!
I passed my subject in a regular school...
with real tests and regular teachers.
I did it, Daniel!
I love Polytechnic School!
I love my teachers! I love everybody, Daniel!
But... But, Daniel...
you didn't fail by much, just a smidge.
My... Ohh.
I didn't... I didn't want to fail by a smidge. I wanted...
I- I-I wanted to... I wanted to get out of one class...
just 'cause I passed, not 'cause I was... n- not 'cause I was too old.
It's o... It's o... It's okay, Daniel. Don't... Don't be upset.
No! No, it isn't okay! It isn't...
Everybody... Everybody's right! Everybody's right, Carla!
Every... I am... I'm dumb!
Everybody's right, Carla! Everybody...
Carla... C-Carla, can you... C-Could you go away for a second? Please?
Okay. Okay.
At my special school they taught us...
that first you learn the easy courses.
Then after you learn those, you try the harder courses.
Only they're not so hard any more...
because you learned the easy stuff first.
See?
An-Another reason I got mad is 'cause I- I didn't want you to think I was dumb.
I could never think that.
It's amazing how you
Can speak right to my heart
Without sayin'a word
You can light up the dark
Try as I may
I could never explain
What I hear when you don't say a thing
The smile on your face
Lets me know that you need me
There's a truth in your eyes
Sayin'you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand
Says you'll catch me
If ever I fall
You say it best
When you say nothin'at all
Okay, you're disappointed. Disappointed in what?
- Uh, me? You? Us? What? - Well, no, dear, not us.
But, I mean, of course it has been bumpy at times.
But... But I always thought we'd end up like this, you know.
- Somehow sailing along together. - Oh, well, good, good. You're not disappointed in us.
'Cause I love sailing with you. The girls, they never really liked sailing much.
- Yeah. - You disappointed with the girls?
Well, I feel like I'm the mother of a dedicated underachiever, a gay workaholic...
and Carla, who thinks she can conquer this whole terrifying world that we live in.
Honey, they're doing fine.
They're not drug addicts; they're not axe murderers; they're not Democrats.
I don't know. Tell me... I don't know why I am talking like this anyway...
but honestly, Radley, sometimes I think that there must be some mothers out there in the world...
who are better equipped to handle Carla.
Elizabeth, stop it, will ya.
I mean, I know that I fail in some horrible way. Do you know...
Oh, I'll shut up. I promise. Radley, I'm gonna shut my mouth.
Honey, you're just trying to be honest with yourself.
- It's okay. - It's not fair, Radley. It's not fair.
First you're judged as a person, and then you become a parent...
and not only are you judged as a person, but you're also judged by how well your children are doing.
I mean, not who they are, not what they think, but just how well they're doing.
- Elizabeth. - What?
They're doing just fine. We are doing just fine.
- What is this? - Fire.
- And what is the blue? - That's the police.
- And finally, the green. - The hospital.
- That is excellent. - Uh, Elizabeth, how many... - Oh! Thanks.
- Now what... Oh, just... - how many of these extinguishers did you buy?
Not enough, obviously. Hold on just a second.
- L... I know what I'm gonna do. - What are you doing now? - I'm gonna put it in the kitchen.
This is... All right.
Dad, she put one in my bathroom.
Well... Good luck, person in her first apartment.
- Oh, pumpkin. - My first apartment.
Yes.
Now, if you feel lonely or if you need anything, call dear old dad, okay?
- I will. - All right.
- All right... - Well... - say goodbye.
Thank you, Mom.
- Elizabeth. - Don't worry.
- Oh, dear. I got a little bit of lipstick on you. - I'll be okay.
- All right, of course we have to go. Good. Let's go, then. - All right.
Oh, one moment. Oh! Forgot.
This is for you, dear. This is for you to remember every time you leave the house.
- Uh, I showed it to her earlier. - It's a list that I...
- I... It's written down, and I see it. - All right. Good. All right, honey. - Okay. Bye.
- Goodbye. - Okay, bye.
Goodbye... Do you smell gas?
- Drive safe. - Bye. - Bye!
And don't worry!
I'm free to do what I want
Any old time
I said, I'm free to do what I want
Any old time
Hello. This is my apartment.
Would you like to sit down?
I say, love me, hold me
'Cause I'm free
To do what I want
To be what I want
Any old time
'Cause I'm free
To do what I want
Any old time
Listen up, everybody. The Falcon Bar presents body shots at table number 4.
- Body! Body! Body! Body! - My turn!
Body! Body! Body! Body!
- Whoo! - Yeah!
The regular... regular couples don't do that, Daniel.
- They're from college. - Yeah.
- Huh. - Yeah.
Daniel, I want us to be friends...
for a really long time.
Um, well, I-I don't think so.
Why not?
Uh, well, j-just 'cause I... I may have to move to Florida.
- Why? - To live with my mom.
You have to leave?
Well, uh...
'C-Cause my dad won't pay my rent any more...
'cause I... 'cause I failed my classes.
So, um, after the new year's I have to go...
because... 'cause... 'cause I only make 350 dollars a month...
and... and my... and my rent's 500 dollars a month.
Mrs Robinson, you're trying to seduce me.
Aren't you?
Well, no. I hadn't thought of it.
- I feel very flattered. - Mrs Robinson, will you forgive me for what I just said?
- It's all right. - It's not all right. It's the worst thing I ever...
What's the... What's the matter?
Strange things are... are happening to my body.
Me too.
I kinda feel like...
we should be doing something more than kissing.
Me too.
What did they do after they kissed?
They do it, and then he smiles...
and then she... and she smokes a cigarette.
Mmm, but I don't like smoking.
Uh, w-well, me neither. But, uh... I just like to smile.
But... Yeah, I know. Doing it. Sure.
Yeah.
Did you ever?
Oh, I...
Oh, sort of, I did it.
- But you sort of what? - Well, it's just 'cause I was with a bunch... some older guys...
a- a-and they... they all chipped in and they paid this girl...
and she had... she had a reputation...
to... to kiss me, and then, and then, you know...
and do some other stuff, you know.
And then... And then...
And then what?
Well, i... it's just that there was... there was a lot of kissing...
and there was a... there was a lot of, um, hugging...
and there was a... there was a lot of rubbing.
And then... See, 'cause the thing was, I... 'Cause I finished before I was supposed to. See?
'Cause I... You know. You have to be a guy to understand that.
- 'Cause, see... 'Cause guys and girls are different. - Daniel.
- Guys have a thing. - Did you love her?
I sure... Well, I sure thought I did.
Hmm.
But not... not like I love you.
'Cause I... I... I... I love you every minute.
I love you more than band music...
and cookie-making.
That's... That's a stupid thing to say, I know, I...
No.
That's the first time...
anybody's ever said that to me before.
I love you too, Daniel McMahon.
I don't want you to leave.
Me neither.
The reason I'm always saying no to you is because of what you ask for, Carla.
But Daniel never asked for the money.
- He would just come and move in with me. - That's the same as asking for money.
But it's my idea.
- And, see, his rent is $500, and he can't afford it, Mom. - Honey. Carla.
Carla, he cannot move in with you.
- But it's my place. - No, it is not your place.
It is the person who pays for the rent. That is the boss of the apartment.
B- But Dad pays the bills here, and you're the boss.
That's different. Radley, please.
- Dad, tell Mom that it's not very different. - Please.
Honey, your mom is right on this one.
Oh, really.
- Mom is right. - Oh, pumpkin.
I'm telling you, that boy sees her as a rich girl.
Well, she is a rich girl, but I don't think he's after her money.
But seriously, aren't you concerned?
Carla is young, she's full of love.
This is the first love she's ever had. She's feeling that for the first time.
This is just a harmless flirtation, a crush.
That's all it is.
So, we can do...
Or we could try, um, page 39.
I marked that.
And page 84...
is okay.
But I don't want to do page 155...
But... I... If I... If I remember correctly...
t- t-there's a page... it's, uh, 146.
And i-i... it looks pretty good.
How much do you weigh?
Uh, well, let's see. L... I-I... See, 'cause... 'cause I weigh 145...
and four ounces.
- Four ounces? - Yeah.
- Well, that sounds okay. - Yeah. See... Yeah.
So, d-do you want to do it now?
'Cause I... I got the, um...
I got protection...
at the family planning place.
And, uh... See- See, 'cause, uh... I... I even got ones that glow in the dark.
And... And... And see, they... 'cause they made me practise on a banana.
- Do you want me to show you how to do it? - No.
Okay.
So, are you ready?
'Cause, 'cause I'm ready.
Ready?
Are you r-ready?
Come on, 'cause... 'cause we can do it in the... in the bedroom, if you want.
No, I'm not ready.
L... Daniel.
I don't want to do it right now.
I was thinking that we could wait till the next holiday...
because holidays are special...
and Thanksgiving is coming up soon...
Oh, 'cause, uh, I feel special right now, Carla.
But Thanksgiving, there's a turkey and there's more than two desserts.
Yeah.
It's like a magic.
- Oh. - But I don't... I don't wanna do it now.
- Uh... - Well, let's get your bike.
So I just save these for Thanksgiving, right?
- Yeah, Thanksgiving. - Yeah. Okay.
You always tell me
That it's impossible
To be respected
And be a girl
Please be careful with me
I'm sensitive
And I'd like to stay that way
- Very careful. Good girl. That's right. It's hot. - Wow.
- Oh, that looks good. - Looks good.
Put it down over here, 'cause this is nice, cold marble.
Yes!
Good! That's good. All right, now curl your fingers. Don't get your fingers in.
And we thank You that we are all here together again for the first time in many years...
making this a Thanksgiving for each of us to remember.
Amen.
- Potatoes. - Good.
So, Caroline, please tell me how, with your horrible temper...
you think you're going to be able to manage teaching second grade.
- Oh, don't talk like that about your sister. - I don't have a horrible temper.
- I love children. - She's a good teacher. - I just get mad at adults.
- Mm-hmm. And her sister, occasionally. - Thanks, Winnie.
- Yeah! - Oh, just occasionally her sister.
- Have you seen her temper? - But, Carla, do you know what I did?
- Are we almost done? - What's your hurry?
Carla, why are you in such a hurry?
I don't want to get home too late.
Yes, Mom, I took all the right buses.
Will you thank Winnie for making me the food bundle?
Okay, good night, Mom.
Happy Thanksgiving.
John Elway recovers on the 13-yard line!
This is so good.
It's, uh... Uh, this is... Last year...
Uh, last year, um, I ate tids and bits...
and it... and it just... it just doesn't have that Thanksgiving feeling.
Yeah.
Well, Winnie made everything except the sweet potatoes.
I made that and put all the little marshmallows on top.
Oh, 'cause... 'cause that was my favourite part.
- Eh, no, it wasn't. - Yeah, it was.
Well, I'm stuffed.
Well, it's... it's Thanksgiving. Remember the... 'm-m-member what we said we were gonna do on Thanksgiving?
- Yeah. - Yeah?
I wonder who thought up sex in the first place, Daniel.
L- I-I think it was Madonna, actually.
But, Daniel...
I'm kind of scared.
Well, you... you don't have to be scared, Carla.
'Cause you know why?
'Cause I would... 'Cause I would never hurt you.
'Cause you... you're the last person in the world that I'd ever hurt.
Okay.
- Carla? - Just a second.
That's nice underwear.
Yeah.
I got it from my sister's closet.
I've never been naked in front of anyone before.
Just you.
Should we have some music, Daniel?
Uh, i-i-it's okay. I'll get some music.
Okay.
I know why you're smiling.
- Why? - When someone smiles like that, they're in love.
Really?
Oh, Carla, there you are. You know, I've got some new art books for you to look at.
And I want you to select a few paintings that we can discuss later. All right?
- Yeah. - All right.
- Well, I like "The Lace Maker. " - Mm-hmm.
And this one right here.
That's the famous "Girl with the Red Hat. "
- That's such a pretty painting. - She...
But I think we should look at our Sister Wendy, because she's going to be in Florence this week. I'm very excited.
I'm going on a grand tour in search of some of the finest art treasures in the world.
What are... You know something?
- What? - You look different to me, dear.
- What's going on, huh? - Beginning my grand tour in Florence.
Strange.
...and sometimes played at funerals.
Um...
Hello?
Oh, hi, Dad.
Yeah. Um, wait.
Uh, well, I was... I was wondering i- if... if you could change your mind...
a- a-about not giving me the money, just 'cause...
just 'cause I... I met this girl and then...
Um...
Oh, y-yeah.
Well, Dad, just... Wh... Uh...
What about just giving me, uh, enough... enough money just until I... I fi... I find a better job that... that pays...
Oh, yeah. Yeah.
Okay... Yeah, 'cause it... It's just that sometimes I forget.
Yeah.
Um, yeah, I m... I miss you too.
Uh, I'm, uh...
How... How are you, Da...
Okay, bye.
If you're happy and you know it clap your hands
If you're happy...
Oh, I know what you guys are gonna do tonight.
Hey, the Daniel McMahon bike rack.
Hey! Take that bike off my porch!
If you're happy and you know it clap your hands
Ernie! Ernie!
Thank you, San Francisco!
Thank you, Elvis McMahon.
Ernie!
The Spanish mustang!
- Uh, hey, that smells like a good year, pal. Come on. Come on inside. - Well, I...
I love Carla, Ernie. Carla loves me. There's a fact.
Okay, most people at school make fun of me...
and they... and they... and they never... and they never talk to me, Ernie.
They never, ever talk to me.
And she... she... 'Cause she's the... she's the only one that makes me feel like a person.
- Oh, come on, now. - To Carla!
Now... Now... Come on, now! Now, that's... All right. Here.
- Let's go... What's that? What's that? - Got ya.
- Aw, Ernie! - See how I did that?
- I love to drink, Ernie. - Oh, yeah? Come on.
- Yeah. It makes me feel good. - Oh, yeah?
Yeah. Wait, is that... is that why people drink?
Oh, people drink for lots of reasons.
Some to be happy, some to forget, some to be brave.
I think... I think I wanna... I think I wanna be brave, Ernie.
No. Only cowards get brave that way.
Forget drinking. Forget all that stuff.
You gotta find what makes you happy. Danny, what makes you happy?
Uh...
- Come on. What makes you happy? - I wanna... I wanna take a ride in your Mustang.
That's, uh... That'd make me really happy, Ernie.
You never did that, and that... t- t-that would make me very happy.
No, I can't take that car out in winter weather. It'll ruin her paint job.
Some other time. Anything else would make you happy? Come on.
Yeah.
Help me... Help me find a job so that I can be with Carla forever.
I'm sorry your father won't change his mind.
See, he s... he s... he said he'd paid for me long enough...
and that he... he said... he said it's my mother's turn.
I'm very angry right now, Ernie.
Oh, I can understand anger. I know about that.
No! No, no, no, no. Easy now. There. Easy. Come on, now, easy.
Watch my guitar. Now, easy.
You know what I do sometimes when I get angry? You know what I do?
I call up a buddy. I call a pal. Hmm? See?
And, uh, somethin' like this. How are ya? See?
That's it. That...
- That's good. - Yeah.
Yeah? That's it. See? See?
- Yeah. - Patting. Patting is good.
P... Patting. That's it.
Heather!
All right, guys, what do we think about this for the country club, hmm?
- Mm-hmm. That is so chic. - Very.
- Where'd you get that? - At Michelle's, uh, Soho boutique, actually.
Where is Carla? We're gonna be late, aren't we?
You know what? You always do that, Mother. You know who she is.
- She's the one... - Oh, please. - That you refer to as my special friend.
- Ohh. - All right, tension alert.
You know what? Honey, why don't you go start the car, and I'm gonna go find Carla...
- and you... - Mmm.
Wait, Mother, you never even met Michelle.
- Come on! - I cannot believe it. You're still doing the look.
- Oh, wow. Dad, she's still doing the look. - Look...
- You know what? - I just... - Mother, we've had this conversation several times.
- I don't wanna have it any more. - I just hope you outgrow it, that's all.
Yeah, a-and I'd hoped you'd accept it.
Mother, being gay is not a diagnosis.
It's not a disease I'm going to recover from or a phase I'm going to outgrow.
I know what being gay is, okay?
I give to gay causes. I support gay parades. They even gave me a plaque.
Yes. So why support them and not me?
- Because I'm not their mother. - Yes, I know this. You're mine.
So why can't you just say it? I have a gay daughter.
- I have a gay daughter. - It's not like I'm asking you to go on Oprah, mother. Just say it to me.
- Oh, look at this. - I have. - Look at this evolution coming down the stairs.
- Isn't that beautiful? - Ohh.
Caroline and Heather did my make-up. Both sides.
Oh, yeah. Look at that. Well, honey, let's... Uh, the limousine is waiting for you.
- Let's go out there, princess... - Ohh, beauty. - And slip into your...
Carla. Your gentleman caller just arrived. He's on the porch.
- Oh, your Prince Charming. Let's go find Prince Charming. - Ohh... Oh, it's Daniel!
- We're gonna check on the limo. - All right.
- I'll put his bike away. - This earring is driving me crazy.
I can't take it. I'm not... I'm never gonna wear it again.
- Hi. - Wow.
You look really handsome.
Yeah, you look r-really pretty.
Oh. Did you talk to your dad yet?
Oh, n... Well, 'cause I... 'cause I don't... I- I-I don't need my dad any more...
'cause I... 'cause I have an idea for... for us.
I knew you'd come up with something.
- Yeah. - We're coming, Dad!
- Okay! - So deck the halls with boughs of holly
- 'Tis the season to bejolly - To bejolly
Yeah, don we now our gay apparel
- It's Christmas time - Hi.
- You know my mother Pucky. - Of course I know Pucky.
So, how are the plans going for Caroline's wedding?
- We're excited. - What about you, Heather?
- Any young chaps on the horizon for you yet? - Oh!
You know what? No. You know, the literary world is just a lot of reclusive writers...
and, you know, serial killers, so...
- Caroline, where's the wedding going to be? - It's gonna be at St John's Church.
- Oh, right here in Sutter Hills. - Uh, New Zealand.
- Hey. - It's not in New Zealand, Jeff.
It's in Sutter Hills.
Carla...
I- I-I'm kind of afraid of your family.
I feel that way too sometimes, Daniel.
- You do? - Yeah.
But all you have to do is be brave...
and then you could say anything you want...
'cause you feel more comfortable.
E- Excuse me, I'll be... Excuse me, I'll be right back.
- Here you are, sir. - Very nice bottle.
Yes, sir, you picked a very nice bottle. Green.
So that... So that'll make me very brave?
Sir, it's 110 proof. It'll make you very brave.
- Thank you. - Thank you, and merry Christmas.
Yes, it is.
Thank you, Martin.
My publishing company is going to merge next month.
Ah, Dr Longhurst, master of the root canal.
- Elizabeth. Elizabeth Russell. - Mmm.
That's that young dental hygienist who married the Tate boy.
- You know, Ridley? - Radley.
- I should've married him.
His father Orson built this club.
Oh, Carla, did you receive that Dustin Hoffman book that I sent you?
Yeah. I'm going to give it to Daniel for Christmas.
Don't tell Ernie.
- I don't know any Ernie. - Good.
- Merry Christmas. - It still is.
Carla, come here.
- Sit down there. This is a surprise. - Where is... Where is Daniel?
He's missing everything.
Ladies and gentlemen, everybody, may I have your attention, please?
Olive juice.
- Some months ago... - What are you saying?
- Olive juice. - While I was soliciting petition signatures at a sorority house...
- Why? - Because from far away...
- I had this wonderful... - it looks like "I love you. "
That's a very good trick!
And if I said it was love at first sight, that would be disingenuous.
- "Disin... " What? - Untruthful. - Oh.
She had just come back from a softball game and had the worst case of hat hair I've ever seen.
Je... Oh, my God.
It looked terminal.
"Hat hair. "
But Cupid's arrows overcame her dishevelled coif...
and I did fall in love with her, very much in love.
And next month she's going to make me...
the happiest man alive by becoming my wife.
And now I would like to dance to our favourite song...
"Baby, I'm Yours. "
My favourite song is "Michelle, My Belle. "
- What? What did you say? - Nothing.
- Baby, I'm yours - Baby, I'm yours
- And I'll be yours - Yours
Until the stars fall from the sky
Yours until the rivers all run dry
In other words, until I die
- Baby, I'm yours - Hi.
Uh, I just... C-Caroline and Jeff...
w- would you mind j- j-just to sit down for ju...
Olive juice.
Could you sit down as well?
- Just give him a minute. - He might...
- All right, let's just see what he has to say. - Maybe he has a surprise.
My name is Daniel McMahon...
and I... I'm in love with a girl too.
A- A-A-And she... she does not have hat hair.
- That's was a joke, Mom. - He's a stand-up comic. It was a good joke. - Mmm. Yes.
Her... Her- Her na... Her name is Carla Tate...
and she love... s-s-she loves me too.
And I have never had that before.
And my... my dad...
is... is, uh... he's gonna send me to Florida.
And I want her to... I w-w-want her to come along with me.
Oh! Wow!
- That is out of the question. - He's just kidding.
- That is out... - Please. - Excuse me. Look what I've done. - He's just kidding, dear.
He's full of surprises, Mom.
And we love each other so much...
that last Thanksgiving...
we did it.
And it was... it was so beautiful.
- That is not what... But he's saying that... - Daddy. - Mark.
- Daddy, please go up there and do something. - B-But, Mom... - O-O-Okay.
- I'd like to sing a song for her. - That's not what he was saying... - It's okay. It's all right. It's all right.
And here's our song.
Seventy-six trombones led the big parade
No, that's not what it is, what...
With 110 cornets close at hand
Stop laughing! Stop laughing at me!
You stop laughing at me!
- Honey. Honey. Honey. - That's not funny, Daniel!
Honey... Baby, please... Baby. Baby, baby. It's okay.
- It's all right. - Stop laughing at me!
Sir. Sir, if you would kindly step this way, sir.
Step this way, sir, please. Uh, everybody dance, please!
Play something.
All right, Jeff, get the girls home. We'll call you later.
- I hate what he did. - Calm down. I know.
- I know, I know, dear. - Charles!
- Now, just get in this car, sit down... - Where the hell is he? - Sit down and relax. Why did...
- I don't know where Charles is. Is she okay? - Where is he?
- I think he's probably in the restroom. - Well... - Gary, did you see our limousine driver?
Carla, Carla, I'll be right back. Just sit right there.
Oh, for God's sake! Where is that man?
- Is she all right? - Yes, she's fine!
Carla. Carla.
Why did you do that, Daniel?
- I'm s... I'm sorry. - Why did you tell everybody our love secrets?
- I'm sorry, Car... - No!
You made everyone laugh at me!
I'm sorry, Carla. I never... I don't... I mean, I don't think everybody laughed at you.
I don't care if you're sorry, Daniel!
God!
You're stupid!
What you did was stupid, and I don't want to ever see you again!
So? I don't even care!
I never... I don't care!
I never... I don... I don't wanna see you either!
- Shut up! Leave me alone! - I think you're stupid too!
- I think that you're really stupid! - Carla!
- I want you to leave me alone! - Carla!
- Mom, make him leave me alone. - Here. - Whoa!
- No, no, no. No, no. - Charles, get her in the car. - You're stupid!
- No, I'm not stupid. - I'm not... I'm not stupid! - Just go in.
- Gary! Make sure he gets home! - I'm not... I'm not stupid!
- Get a cab. Get him home. - I don't love him.
- I know. - You're stupid.
- Go home, Danny. Just get in. - Here. Good.
'Round yon virgin Mother and child
- Let's go, Charles. - We'll be out of here in a minute, Dr Tate.
Holy infant so tender and mild
Sleep in heavenly peace
Sleep in heavenly
- Why did he do it? - Peace
Danny had too much to drink and he didn't know what he was saying, pumpkin.
He didn't mean to embarrass you.
Everything is going to be fine. It's all going to work out in the end.
I don't understand
How the sun keeps shinin'
And I don't understand
Why the seasons change
Oh, he's fine. Yeah, he's a friend of the band.
- And I don't have a clue - Oh, yeah. That's the kid who's leaving.
What makes the rivers flow
Loving you is all I know
I can't tell you why
The stars come out in the evenin'
And I can't tell you where they go
When they're gone
And I don't have a clue
What makes a flower grow
Loving you is all I know
I don't know how the world keeps on spinnin' 'round
I don't know why the sky don't come fallin'down
I just know that I would die
Without your touch, oh
I don't know why the tide needs to reach the shore
I just know that I need you for forevermore
- Knowin'that I get inside our love - All aboard!
I don't understand
How the sun keeps shinin'
I don't understand
Why the seasons change and change and change
And I don't have a clue
What What makes the rivers flow
Loving you is all I know
Is all I know, is all I know Is all I know
Loving you is all I know
All right, let's start the rehearsal.
The groomsmen over here, and we'll have the bridesmaids come up and...
Excuse me, but are they going to continue to act like clowns?
Well, they're just having fun. They're good guys.
- All right, excuse me. - Ohh! Oh, I'm so sorry.
I'm so sorry, but, you know, Cousin Anne...
she was not exactly thrilled with her hotel accommodations.
- Hi. - Okay. - Not that she has any idea what a hotel accommo... Oh.
- I'm sorry, who is... Are you a groomsman? - No. This is my assistant Mark.
Okay. Cousin Anne's very happy. Let's move on.
- All right. - Let's do move on, all right? - Excellent. All right.
- Everybody, we're gonna start with a... - Excuse me. Excuse me.
Would you mind if I had just a few minutes alone with my family, please?
- Fine. - Thank you. - Okay, listen.
- I'd just like to say that the only reason I'm even here... - Oh, Heather. - Huh?
Is because it's Caroline's dream to have all of her sisters at her wedding.
But this might be the very last time I attend a family function without Michelle.
Duly noted. Let's rehearse, okay? Come on. Let's go. Let's rehearse.
- Yeah, and if Daniel is not here... - Dad, I mean it.
- I have no one to dance with, Mom. - You have someone you can dance with, honey, right here. - We'll talk about this, okay? Shh.
You can dance with your cousin Theodore. I'm sure he would love to dance with you.
You know... Hello! Guys! This... It's, like, Danny, Michelle... Would you give me a break here?
It's the middle child's wedding. You know what I'm saying?
- The middle child's wedding. I am the middle child. - Caroline. - Honey. Caroline, honey.
- Honey, we know that. - My wedd... No! - No, no, excuse me. - Calm down.
- I think it's just as important that I have somebody here that I want here. That's all I'm saying. - All you do... Danny and Michelle...
- My wedding comes once in a lifetime. - Listen to me for one minute.
- Come here. Come here. - This is ridiculous. - Listen to me.
- Be quiet! - Please. Everybody, please. - Shh!
This is a Tate family wedding. I'm very proud of that.
And, Caroline, I'm very proud of you.
But we have hundreds of guests and family who are attending...
so I think it would behove us to suppress the minutiae...
long enough to show everybody how proud we are to be Tate family.
- Now, let's rehearse. - Well said. Well said.
But my favourite actor's Dustin Hoffman. Did... Did you... Did you ever see that movie, The Graduate?
Is that the one where, uh, he's in a dress, or is that the one with the camels?
- Deming. This station is Deming. Next stop is El Paso. - And then... And then...
And then s-she goes off to get, get married to somebody else, and see... and see...
Dustin knows that she still loves him.
A- A-And...
And then he gets all confused and, and mixed up...
and then... and then he goes and he tries to rescue her.
All aboard!
- Do, do-do-do, do-do do-do, do-do-do-do, do - O-Okay. Okay, bye! I'll see you later.
Nice talking to you.
Uh... I-I-I was going to Florida...
and I-I-I changed my mind, and I want... I wanna go back to San Francisco.
Do, do-do-do, do-do do-do, do-do-do-do, do
You want to exchange your ticket?
Yes! Yes, I want... Um, okay. Okay.
And here's to you Mrs Robinson
Jesus loves you more than you will know Hey, hey, hey
- Do Flipper! - God, you're a freak. - Hey, hey, hey
- Yea! Yeah! Do more, Heather. - No.
I'm not doing any more. Can we just play, like, another game or something?
Yeah, but I don't wanna play...
Pin the Penis on the Naked Guy again.
- Yeah, I'll second that. - Come on, you guys! This is fun.
I mean, we gotta have fun. This is my last night single.
God bless you, please Mrs Robinson
Heaven holds a place for those who pray
Hey, hey, hey Hey, hey, hey
- You go, Carla. - Okay. Now it's my turn.
I wish I could see Daniel again.
- Oh, Carla, don't be sad. - Oh, Carla, don't get sad.
- Come on. You gotta be happy. This is my sisters happy night thing. - No.
But I wish I could see him again just for a little second...
to tell him that I don't hate him.
Where have you gone Joe DiMaggio
A nation's turns its lonely eyes to you
Whoo-whoo-whoo
What's that you say Mrs Robinson
Joltin'Joe has left and gone away
Hey, hey, hey Hey, hey, hey
Hi. You look like you need a ride. Come on. Dad says it's okay.
- O-Okay. - Hi. I'm Jenny.
- You want a pretzel or a marshmallow? - Yeah, thank you.
I'm really hungry.
Who presents this woman to be married?
- We do. - We do.
- Please be seated. - Okay.
Thanks, Fred! Thanks for the ride!
Excuse me. The soup kitchen is around in the parish hall.
But it won't be open until 5:00.
But I-I, see, I don't... I don't want any soup.
- L-I came to see a girl in the wedding. - I don't think so.
- But can I... Carla... - I said I don't think so.
Okay.
I give you this ring as a symbol of my vow.
And with all that I am and all that I have...
I honour you in the name of God.
The union of husband and wife in heart...
body and mind is...
- Ginger. - What? - Intended...
- by God for their mutual joy. - Did you just throw something at my head? - No.
And for the health and-and comfort...
gi... given one another in...
- prosperity... - Radley, what is going on? - Someone's throwing...
Well, what on Earth is this happening?
And for the gift and heritage of children.
- Is this your idea of a joke? - They are laughing right now...
- Please, this is not funny. - At the wedding.
But to reverently and deliberately in accordance...
with the purposes for which it was instituted by God.
Danny?
Daniel.
- Carla Tate. - Daniel!
- What? - Oh, my God, it's Daniel.
Meet you out front in the lobby.
Mark, the homeless boy is up in the organ balcony.
I'm gonna go back down.
- What are they up to? - Okay.
- Don't make trouble. - Whoa!
- No. Is he all right? - Daniel? Are you okay?
I think... He seems to be okay.
I don't wanna be apart ever again, Daniel.
- Yeah, never again. - I love you.
Carla, Carla.
I wa-wa-want to get married.
I want... I want to spend... I want to spend the rest of my life with you.
You know, I thought our worst problem was gonna be parking.
Carla Tate, will you marry me?
Did he say marry her?
- Just call up... - Winnie, not right now!
Yes, I will, Daniel McMahon.
Daniel, stand right here.
- Okay. - And a little bit quiet.
- Just be quiet. - This is good. It's like Where's Waldo?
E- Excuse me, um... Mother, could you say something, please?
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm... I'm so terribly sorry...
for this slight inconvenience, but you know how children will be sometimes.
In any event, I think we should proceed with our very lovely ceremony...
and Carla will retire as a bridesmaid...
and she will come and join us with Daniel, and we will finalize these vows.
- Well done. - Thank you. You have been fabulous!
Love is in the air.
Ladies and gentlemen, as best man of these festivities...
it is my one duty of the evening to make a toast.
To the bride and groom!
Go along. It's all right. Have a good time, all right?
- Elizabeth, it should have been filmed for a TV special. - Hi!
- And that boy jumping off the balcony! - Oh, wasn't that... Well, well, we didn't exactly plan that.
- We're gonna be calling you Granny soon. - Well, I hope so. Oh, what's the matter?
She broke her shoe. I can't take her anywhere.
It's all right.
- Mom? - Yes?
- Is it time to plan another wedding? - Radley!
- Uh, I don't think you need... - I know that you don't like Daniel now...
but in time...
Oh! Everything's perfect, and your daughters are so beautiful.
- I know they are beautiful, Mary. - But don't you have a son?
No, no. Cousin Vivian has a son.
- Oh! Thank you. - Vivian. Yes. That's very... Okay.
- Mom. - What, honey?
- You do like him? - Oh, I like him. It's just I don't know if you're ready...
- Hi, Radley. - Did you think so? - You don't think I'm ready to be married?
Oh, Carla. Will you please listen to me?
Please listen to what I'm saying.
When you think you're in love, your eyes are closed to all logic and reason.
- It's not the time to make a big decision. - No, but my eyes are not closed, Mother!
Dear, Carla, we can have this discussion...
without you getting upset in front of everybody, Carla.
- My eyes are not closed, Mother! - Please, Carla.
- Carla! - Is everything all right?
Just... Oh! Wh... Are you all right?
No, it's fine.
Carla, wait a minute! Wait!
Carla! Wait!
My God, this looks bad. I better go tell the girls.
Carla, stop it! Stop! Carla!
Oh, my God.
Carla, just wait a second. I just want you to understand!
- Carla, listen to me. Listen. - What? What?
It's not that I don't like Danny. It has nothing to do with whether I like Danny or not!
- Yes, it does! - No, it doesn't.
- What's wrong with him, Mother? - Nothing is wrong with him, Carla.
He's fine. He's perfectly fine. I'm just asking for you to wait.
Danny's the first boy you've met, and I think you can do better!
No, but I can't do better because I'm not better.
- You're better. You're better. - Stop touching me!
- You're better! - I'm not a baby!
No, I'm not better.
I'm just me, Mom. Can't you see me?
- I just... - You never look at me!
And no matter how long I wait...
I can't be a painter, and I can't play tennis.
- And I'm not an artist. - Okay, but I...
But I know how to do some things.
- Yes. Yes. - And I can love.
And I love Daniel, and he loves me very much.
I know he does, but, Carla, I just...
don't think that he can take care of you!
He can barely take care of himself.
We can take care of each other!
We don't need you, Mother!
But don't worry. You don't have to come to my wedding.
I'll do my own wedding. I hated everything you did for Caroline's wedding.
Okay.
I hated the dumb hats and these dumb shoes...
and your big, ugly centrepieces.
The only thing I like is this dress.
- This is pretty. - Okay.
I'm gonna keep it.
- Oh, my God! Come back inside, dear, please. - No!
- I'm gonna do my wedding all by myself. - Please, Carla.
And if you don't like Daniel, I don't care. Don't come.
Because Daniel will be there for sure.
- I'm going home, Mother. - Carla, come back!
- No! - Please!
Ohh! Oh, C...
But, Carla... Carla!
Y- Your mom's not gonna help throw our wedding?
- No. - Are you sure?
'Cause she... she throws a really nice wedding.
Yes, I'm very sure.
She's not planning the wedding because we are.
Ow! Oh, you almost got me.
- Please come to our wedding on February 14 at St Francis Church. - Heather?
Guess what. Carla's getting married this weekend.
The bridesmaids are going to be you, Heather and Rachel from school.
Yes, you plan it. I will chip in.
And some other school friends are coming too.
Oh, tell Carla I said thank you so much for including Michelle.
But be on time.
Daniel made a special arrangement with the church...
and we're going to be married...
in between another wedding and a funeral.
- It's almost time. - Uh, yes. Yes, Winnie.
- There's your suit, Dr Tate. - Thank you. Thank you. - It's been pressed.
- See you at the church. - Yes.
Where were you this morning?
Carla asked me to talk to Danny about responsibilities, about bravery.
- I'm going to that wedding, Elizabeth. - Mm-hmm.
I'm gonna go to that wedding.
Carla refuses to let me pay for the wedding, but she does want me...
to walk her down the aisle, and I'm gonna walk her down the aisle.
When you reach a certain age and you're not talking to your children...
I think you're missing a very important part of the journey.
You better get going. You're going to be late.
- Hi! - Watch your step.
- Hi. - Hi, sweetie.
I'm so proud of you. I love you.
That's the mother, the boyfriend...
and the baker, Danny's boss.
That's the housekeeper and the son-in-law.
At last
My love has come along
My lonely days are over
- Life is but a song - I think your boy's gonna be a great baker.
Come on, come on!
- Who gives the... - Will you turn that down?
Who gives their blessing that this woman be wed?
I do.
You are beautiful.
Please be seated.
- Do you, Daniel McMahon, take... - Oh... Uh... See, 'cause... 'cause...
Actually, Carla and I, we're gonna... we're gonna do our own vows.
- Yeah. - Yeah.
- You said you didn't want to do that. - Yeah, but that was before...
w- when we didn't make it up yet.
And we came up with our own vows now, at the last minute.
Okay... Okay, you... We... We say our vows, and then you say your vows.
But we'll still pay you if you don't wanna do your...
Please, just do whatever's in your hearts.
Okay. Carla Tate?
I love you very much...
and I wanna make you happy.
And, uh, I, I take you as my wife...
forever and forever and forever.
And then it... it's my turn.
So...
Daniel... Daniel McMahon...
I love you very much...
and I want to make you happy...
and I take you as my wife...
That's all right. Just try it again.
That doesn't matter. It... It doesn't matter.
I just wanted to say...
that I love you very much...
and I wanted to let everybody know...
and I take you as my husband...
for the rest of my life.
That's all.
Oh, uh, uh... Just wait... One... One moment. We have to do the rings. The rings.
- Danny. - Now, please take this ring.
Okay, w-with this ring, I give you my love...
and... and I... my promise and my, my joy...
that for wherever you are, I will always love you.
I feel exactly the same way.
Oh, wait. Just one more. I'm sorry. One more moment.
And now, by the power vested in me...
Here it comes.
I now pronounce you husband and wife.
Go in peace.
Now you may do it.
Now you can kiss your bride.
Please join me in greeting Mr and Mrs Daniel McMahon.
Yea!
- Thanks, Dad. - Love you.
Hi!
Oh, my Carla.
Oh. Oh.
Oh, Carla.
I want you to meet my husband.
- Hi. - I just would love to welcome you to the family.
Thank you.
Daniel... Oh! That's very, very sweet.
- Thank you, Mom. - Yes.
- It was such a beautiful wedding. - Well, that's very...
That's okay. Don't worry about it. That's absolutely fine.
- Bye, Caroline. - Bye, sweetie. - Bye!
- Oh, congratulations. - Bye!
- Look at her. - It's time to meet Michelle.
- Heather would like you to meet Michelle. - Where?
- Where is she? - Okay, okay, okay.
- Mother? - Michelle.
It's a pleasure to finally meet you, Mrs Tate.
- I've heard so much about you. - Oh, okay. Okay. Okay.
Ow. Honey, I have birdseed in my eye.
Thank you so much.
W- Wait! Everyone... Everybody, just...
J- Just... Wait for a second, okay? Wait.
What are we waiting for, Daniel?
- What's going on? - No, just wait one second, okay?
Wait.
Carla, look.
- Oh, wow! - This is my present for my bride.
- Thank you! - This is my present for my bride!
Look, Danny. Walkin' Wally is walking for us!
At last
My love has come along
- Platoon, halt! - Oh, my God. L-It's Joseph.
- My lonely days - Eyes right!
Congratulations, Carla and Danny!
- And life is like - Yea!
- A song - Ready, front! - Bye, pumpkin!
Bye, Mom!
- Bye! - At last - Don't worry, Mom. Everything's fine.
Olive juice.
For you are mine
At last
You are mine
At last
You are mine
At last
When superstars and cannonballs are running through your head
And television freaks show cops and robbers everywhere
Animals and children tell the truth They never lie
Which one is more human There's a thought, now you decide
Compassion in thejungle Compassion in your head
Would you like to make a run for it Would you like to take my hand
Yeah, yeah
- 'Cause I want to live - Like animals
- Careless and free - Like animals
I want to live I want to run through thejungle
The wind in my hair
Ohh, ohh
- See, I want to live - Like animals
- And I want to live - Like animals
- Ohh, ohh - Like animals
- Oh, I'm feelin' - Like animals
Like animals
You're gonna love me
Like nobody's loved me
Come rain or come shine
Happy together
Unhappy together
And won't it be fine
Days may be cloudy or sunny
We're in or we're out of the money
But I'm with you always
I'm with you rain or shine
Rain or shine