1 00:00:10,478 --> 00:00:14,113 [quirky music] 2 00:00:14,115 --> 00:00:15,147 - ♪ i'm goin' down to south park ♪ 3 00:00:15,149 --> 00:00:17,116 ♪ gonna have myself a time ♪ 4 00:00:17,118 --> 00:00:18,650 - ♪ friendly faces everywhere ♪ 5 00:00:18,652 --> 00:00:20,786 ♪ humble folks without temptation ♪ 6 00:00:20,788 --> 00:00:22,271 - ♪ i'm goin' down to south park ♪ 7 00:00:22,272 --> 00:00:23,755 ♪ gonna leave my woes behind ♪ 8 00:00:23,758 --> 00:00:25,691 - ♪ ample parking day or night ♪ 9 00:00:25,693 --> 00:00:27,493 ♪ people spouting howdy neighbor ♪ 10 00:00:27,495 --> 00:00:28,527 - ♪ headin' on up to south park ♪ 11 00:00:28,529 --> 00:00:30,562 ♪ gonna see if i can't unwind ♪ 12 00:00:30,564 --> 00:00:33,799 - ♪ [muffled] ♪ 13 00:00:33,801 --> 00:00:36,735 - ♪ come on down to south park and meet some friends of mine ♪ 14 00:00:39,673 --> 00:00:42,674 [upbeat music] 15 00:00:42,676 --> 00:00:50,482 ♪ ♪ 16 00:00:52,753 --> 00:00:55,320 - Boner balls. 17 00:00:55,322 --> 00:00:57,756 Boner balls. Boner--boner forest. 18 00:00:57,758 --> 00:01:01,693 Dense boner forest. 19 00:01:01,695 --> 00:01:03,562 - Pungent crotch sweat. 20 00:01:03,564 --> 00:01:06,298 Pungent-- milk--milky crotch ooze. 21 00:01:07,568 --> 00:01:09,501 - Barking vaginal belch. 22 00:01:09,503 --> 00:01:11,336 - Protruding vaginal boner. 23 00:01:11,338 --> 00:01:14,339 - [muffled] - oh, i like that. 24 00:01:18,012 --> 00:01:19,678 - Rotten booby turds! 25 00:01:19,680 --> 00:01:21,213 - Nah. 26 00:01:21,215 --> 00:01:23,348 - Bloody butt cough. - Uh-huh. 27 00:01:25,386 --> 00:01:27,086 Angry clit spasm. 28 00:01:27,088 --> 00:01:28,353 [typing clacks] 29 00:01:28,355 --> 00:01:30,222 [beep] - nope, sorry. 30 00:01:30,224 --> 00:01:32,024 - Whooping fart balls. 31 00:01:32,026 --> 00:01:33,692 [typing clacks] 32 00:01:33,694 --> 00:01:35,127 [beep] - n-nope. 33 00:01:35,129 --> 00:01:36,628 - Lubricated titty burgers. 34 00:01:38,265 --> 00:01:39,665 [beep] - that's taken too. 35 00:01:39,667 --> 00:01:42,668 - Indifferent rectal semen splooge. 36 00:01:42,670 --> 00:01:44,503 [beep] - sorry. 37 00:01:44,505 --> 00:01:46,438 - Indifferent rectal semen splooge is taken? 38 00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:48,574 Come on! - How are we supposed to name 39 00:01:48,576 --> 00:01:51,343 Our startup company if every name is already taken? 40 00:01:51,345 --> 00:01:52,711 - I told you, you just have to be 41 00:01:52,713 --> 00:01:54,713 Really original with your company name, 42 00:01:54,715 --> 00:01:57,716 There's a lot of startup companies these days. 43 00:01:57,718 --> 00:02:02,054 - Furry balls plopped menacingly on the table, incorporated. 44 00:02:02,056 --> 00:02:03,622 [beep] - that's available! 45 00:02:03,624 --> 00:02:06,024 Congratulations. 46 00:02:14,001 --> 00:02:16,768 - It...Doesn't quite roll of the tongue. 47 00:02:16,770 --> 00:02:18,737 - Dude, we're not gonna get any attention with that name. 48 00:02:18,739 --> 00:02:20,639 - Man this sucks! 49 00:02:20,641 --> 00:02:23,342 - Uh, stan, aren't you supposed to be in school? 50 00:02:23,344 --> 00:02:24,710 - No, dad, we don't need school anymore, 51 00:02:24,712 --> 00:02:26,378 We're forming a startup company. 52 00:02:26,380 --> 00:02:29,481 - A startup company? A company that does what? 53 00:02:29,483 --> 00:02:31,183 - No, we don't want to do anything. 54 00:02:31,185 --> 00:02:33,018 - Yeah, that's why we want to have a startup company. 55 00:02:33,020 --> 00:02:34,553 - Yeah, we're sick of school, but all the good, 56 00:02:34,555 --> 00:02:36,722 Attention-getting startup company names are taken! 57 00:02:36,724 --> 00:02:39,658 - Well, boys, there's more to starting a company 58 00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:42,394 Than having a catchy name. 59 00:02:42,396 --> 00:02:45,197 - No, there isn't. 60 00:02:47,334 --> 00:02:49,468 - You guys! You guys, it's awesome! 61 00:02:49,470 --> 00:02:52,271 Holy shit, you guys! 62 00:02:54,141 --> 00:02:56,775 You guys, i've got it! - What? 63 00:02:56,777 --> 00:02:58,610 - It's the greatest startup company name ever. 64 00:02:58,612 --> 00:03:00,345 - What? Tell us! 65 00:03:00,347 --> 00:03:03,749 - Washington redskins. 66 00:03:05,085 --> 00:03:06,218 - Washington redskins? 67 00:03:06,220 --> 00:03:07,553 - It's so sweet. 68 00:03:07,555 --> 00:03:09,421 - I'm pretty sure that's taken, cartman. 69 00:03:09,423 --> 00:03:11,690 - It's not, dude. Some dumb court thingie happened 70 00:03:11,692 --> 00:03:14,359 And the trademark got pulled! We can use it, and the logo! 71 00:03:14,361 --> 00:03:18,096 - Washington redskins. I like it. 72 00:03:18,098 --> 00:03:19,498 - [muffled] me too! - What? 73 00:03:19,500 --> 00:03:21,300 - Dude, there's already brand name awareness, 74 00:03:21,302 --> 00:03:23,001 And it's instantly recognizable. 75 00:03:23,003 --> 00:03:25,137 - Wait, guys, this-- this doesn't seem legal. 76 00:03:25,139 --> 00:03:27,723 - Kyle, you're not hearing me. 77 00:03:27,724 --> 00:03:30,308 The trademark has been pulled. We can do whatever we want. 78 00:03:41,255 --> 00:03:44,523 - You all right, dude? - Yeah, i just-- 79 00:03:44,525 --> 00:03:45,724 Well, i just thought our company name would be 80 00:03:45,726 --> 00:03:47,759 More, like, original. 81 00:03:47,761 --> 00:03:49,194 - It's a strong name, dude. 82 00:03:49,196 --> 00:03:50,462 It's, like, aggressive and masculine, 83 00:03:50,464 --> 00:03:52,564 Like boner forest, but boner forest was taken. 84 00:03:52,566 --> 00:03:55,033 - Yeah, but maybe we need a name that's more affirming. 85 00:03:55,035 --> 00:03:57,069 Like, shows what we stand for. 86 00:03:57,071 --> 00:03:59,705 - We don't stand for anything. Remember our company plan, guys. 87 00:03:59,707 --> 00:04:03,242 Start up, cash in, sell out, bro down. 88 00:04:03,244 --> 00:04:04,309 - I'm just not sure this is the name 89 00:04:04,311 --> 00:04:05,744 People are gonna give money to. 90 00:04:05,746 --> 00:04:07,713 - We already got a dollar! - What? 91 00:04:07,715 --> 00:04:09,514 - $1 pledged! - Whoo-hoo! 92 00:04:09,516 --> 00:04:11,316 - I told you, guys! 93 00:04:11,318 --> 00:04:13,318 "washington redskins" totally gets peoples' attention! 94 00:04:13,320 --> 00:04:15,420 - Another $2! - No way! 95 00:04:15,422 --> 00:04:18,657 - Sitting on our asses, here we come! 96 00:04:18,659 --> 00:04:21,126 - Another new startup company 97 00:04:21,128 --> 00:04:23,695 Is gaining a lot of attention on the internet. 98 00:04:23,697 --> 00:04:26,598 They're a company that does absolutely nothing 99 00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:29,434 And they're called the "washington redskins" 100 00:04:29,436 --> 00:04:31,670 The redskins started as what appeared to be 101 00:04:31,672 --> 00:04:33,705 Some kind of adolescent prank, 102 00:04:33,707 --> 00:04:35,607 But almost overnight, it has become 103 00:04:35,609 --> 00:04:38,577 One of the most heavily funded projects on kickstarter. 104 00:04:38,579 --> 00:04:40,178 Why did you give $5 105 00:04:40,180 --> 00:04:42,714 To the washington redskins kickstarter? 106 00:04:42,716 --> 00:04:44,750 - I don't know, i just-- 107 00:04:44,752 --> 00:04:46,752 They don't do anything, that's pretty sweet. 108 00:04:46,754 --> 00:04:49,021 I don't know. I thought it was funny. 109 00:04:49,023 --> 00:04:51,356 - By pledging just $1 or $2, you are helping us 110 00:04:51,358 --> 00:04:53,592 In our fervent quest to not have to do stuff. 111 00:04:53,594 --> 00:04:56,028 If you pledge $10 or more, you will receive 112 00:04:56,030 --> 00:04:58,130 This luxurious company micro badge. 113 00:04:58,132 --> 00:05:00,032 - It's called crowd funding, 114 00:05:00,034 --> 00:05:02,067 Using the internet to raise money 115 00:05:02,069 --> 00:05:04,403 Without having to pay back your investors, 116 00:05:04,405 --> 00:05:08,974 A tactic that some believe is unfair and impersonal. 117 00:05:10,244 --> 00:05:12,744 [phone ringing] 118 00:05:12,746 --> 00:05:16,048 - Washington redskins, go fuck yourself. 119 00:05:16,050 --> 00:05:17,616 Sure, we'd be happy to take your money. 120 00:05:17,618 --> 00:05:19,651 Yup, just go to our kickstarter page. 121 00:05:19,653 --> 00:05:22,521 Okay, nice, idiot. Uh-huh, fuck you, bye-bye. 122 00:05:22,523 --> 00:05:24,990 - You are eric cartman? - Yes, i know. 123 00:05:24,992 --> 00:05:26,525 - My name is dan snyder. 124 00:05:26,527 --> 00:05:29,261 I'm the president and owner of the washington redskins. 125 00:05:29,263 --> 00:05:30,595 - Oh, cool. Please, take a seat. 126 00:05:30,597 --> 00:05:33,165 - Thank you, but i will stand. - Nice, i like that. 127 00:05:33,167 --> 00:05:36,368 - Young man, we ask that you please stop using the name 128 00:05:36,370 --> 00:05:39,338 "washington redskins" for your organization. 129 00:05:39,340 --> 00:05:41,173 - Stop? But why? 130 00:05:41,175 --> 00:05:42,774 - Because we are the washington redskins 131 00:05:42,776 --> 00:05:45,310 And we are a football team. 132 00:05:45,312 --> 00:05:47,479 You have no right to use our name to get attention. 133 00:05:47,481 --> 00:05:49,281 - Uh, the trademark got pulled, 134 00:05:49,283 --> 00:05:50,615 So i'm totally free to use the name, actually. 135 00:05:50,617 --> 00:05:52,317 [phone ringing] 136 00:05:52,319 --> 00:05:54,252 Uh, butters, could you get that? 137 00:05:54,254 --> 00:05:56,488 - Washington redskins, go fuck yourself. 138 00:05:56,490 --> 00:05:58,657 - Look, don't you see that when you call your organization 139 00:05:58,659 --> 00:06:01,560 "the washington redskins," it's offensive to us? 140 00:06:01,562 --> 00:06:03,395 - How is it offensive? 141 00:06:03,397 --> 00:06:05,263 - How is it offensive? Jesus, what-- 142 00:06:05,265 --> 00:06:07,499 - We are a proud team, mr. Cartman. 143 00:06:07,501 --> 00:06:09,534 We have no wish to be associated 144 00:06:09,536 --> 00:06:11,536 With people who actively do nothing. 145 00:06:11,538 --> 00:06:13,071 - Makes us feel like a joke! 146 00:06:13,073 --> 00:06:15,707 - Guys, guys. We have total respect for you. 147 00:06:15,709 --> 00:06:18,043 When we named our company "washington redskins," 148 00:06:18,045 --> 00:06:20,712 It was out of deep appreciation for your team and your people. 149 00:06:23,016 --> 00:06:26,251 - Uh, i know i can't legally make you stop using our name, 150 00:06:26,253 --> 00:06:29,488 But--but won't you just do it out of decency? 151 00:06:29,490 --> 00:06:32,023 - M-m-m-m-no. 152 00:06:32,025 --> 00:06:34,159 Because i don't want to, 153 00:06:34,161 --> 00:06:36,128 A-a-and we can't just change the name of our company 154 00:06:36,130 --> 00:06:37,662 'cause it's, like, super hard. 155 00:06:37,664 --> 00:06:41,767 But, hey, from one redskin to another, go fuck yourself. 156 00:06:43,137 --> 00:06:46,138 [sad music] 157 00:06:46,140 --> 00:06:53,011 ♪ ♪ 158 00:06:54,648 --> 00:06:56,481 - All around the world, people are saying 159 00:06:56,483 --> 00:06:59,751 They are inspired by the washington redskins. 160 00:06:59,753 --> 00:07:02,287 The internet startup company has raised so much money 161 00:07:02,289 --> 00:07:06,224 On kickstarter, that now, more groups are doing the same. 162 00:07:06,226 --> 00:07:08,527 - More news on the washington redskins tonight, 163 00:07:08,529 --> 00:07:10,462 Their defiant "f-you" attitude 164 00:07:10,464 --> 00:07:13,331 Has now caught the attention of the terrorist group isis. 165 00:07:13,333 --> 00:07:16,701 The terrorists said they admire the washington redskins 166 00:07:16,703 --> 00:07:19,070 And want to try and follow their business model. 167 00:07:19,072 --> 00:07:21,072 - Well, let's not forget, marsha, 168 00:07:21,074 --> 00:07:22,407 That there's a people here, okay, 169 00:07:22,409 --> 00:07:24,743 Who are not happy about the use of the name, 170 00:07:24,745 --> 00:07:26,611 The football washington redskins. 171 00:07:26,613 --> 00:07:29,581 - Well, yeah but does anyone really care about them? 172 00:07:29,583 --> 00:07:32,651 ♪ ♪ 173 00:07:33,720 --> 00:07:36,288 - Dude, this is so cool! 174 00:07:36,290 --> 00:07:38,056 We only have six days to go before all the money 175 00:07:38,058 --> 00:07:39,491 Pledged to our company becomes liquid. 176 00:07:39,493 --> 00:07:41,726 - Guys, we need to talk to you. 177 00:07:41,728 --> 00:07:43,195 I really don't think we want to be a company 178 00:07:43,197 --> 00:07:45,263 That isis looks up to. We should maybe 179 00:07:45,265 --> 00:07:47,032 Issue a statement saying that we don't sanction them. 180 00:07:47,034 --> 00:07:48,467 - Oh, no. No, you guys. 181 00:07:48,469 --> 00:07:50,502 We started this company to do nothing. 182 00:07:50,504 --> 00:07:52,471 If we start doing stuff now, it'll put it all at risk. 183 00:07:52,473 --> 00:07:54,239 - People aren't going to support our company 184 00:07:54,241 --> 00:07:56,441 If we dig in our heels and say we don't care about anything. 185 00:07:56,443 --> 00:07:58,310 - Digging in our heels and pissing on public opinion 186 00:07:58,312 --> 00:08:00,045 Is what the washington redskins are all about! 187 00:08:00,047 --> 00:08:01,480 Now, come on, guys! 188 00:08:01,482 --> 00:08:03,081 If you want to be a successful business, 189 00:08:03,083 --> 00:08:05,016 Then you have to be honest about what you are. 190 00:08:05,018 --> 00:08:07,052 Once you take a stand on something, you're pretending 191 00:08:07,054 --> 00:08:08,453 Like your company is about more than money. 192 00:08:08,455 --> 00:08:10,055 Then all of a sudden, you're the nfl 193 00:08:10,057 --> 00:08:12,724 And your players get caught molesting little boys! 194 00:08:12,726 --> 00:08:14,192 - That's the catholic church! 195 00:08:14,194 --> 00:08:16,094 - Nfl, catholic church, same thing! 196 00:08:16,096 --> 00:08:17,496 Okay, let's use the catholic church. 197 00:08:17,498 --> 00:08:19,097 You take a moral stand on issues, 198 00:08:19,099 --> 00:08:20,632 You say you're about honor and integrity, 199 00:08:20,634 --> 00:08:22,234 And the next thing you know, your clergymen are 200 00:08:22,236 --> 00:08:24,703 Getting caught beating up their wives in an elevator. 201 00:08:24,705 --> 00:08:27,672 - That's the nfl. - It's the same thing, kyle! 202 00:08:27,674 --> 00:08:30,108 The point is, if we as an organization 203 00:08:30,110 --> 00:08:33,011 Claim to be about high morality, somebody is eventually 204 00:08:33,013 --> 00:08:34,479 Going to get raped or beaten in an elevator 205 00:08:34,481 --> 00:08:36,147 And it's most likely going to be butters. 206 00:08:36,149 --> 00:08:37,682 - [gasps] oh, no! 207 00:08:37,684 --> 00:08:41,653 - All right, i really didn't want to have to do this, but-- 208 00:08:41,655 --> 00:08:44,756 I'm not happy with the direction this company is taking. 209 00:08:44,758 --> 00:08:47,459 - Well, what are you gonna do, go back to school? 210 00:08:47,461 --> 00:08:49,761 I'm not going back there, man. 211 00:08:49,763 --> 00:08:52,597 - Maybe i'll start my own company. 212 00:08:52,599 --> 00:08:54,232 - Well, that's fine. 213 00:08:54,234 --> 00:08:55,667 You can't call yourself "washington redskins"! 214 00:08:55,669 --> 00:08:58,169 - I don't want to! It's a stupid name! 215 00:08:58,171 --> 00:09:01,106 [eerie music] 216 00:09:01,108 --> 00:09:02,707 ♪ ♪ 217 00:09:02,709 --> 00:09:06,645 - Well, i guess everything's out on the table now, huh, kyle? 218 00:09:06,647 --> 00:09:09,214 - Yeah, i guess-- i guess everything is. 219 00:09:09,216 --> 00:09:13,318 - Stan, do you think our name is stupid too? 220 00:09:13,320 --> 00:09:15,120 - I don't know, i-- 221 00:09:15,122 --> 00:09:17,355 But i don't know if my future is with this company either. 222 00:09:17,357 --> 00:09:20,225 - Well, then, i wish you both well in your new venture. 223 00:09:20,227 --> 00:09:22,227 Good-bye. 224 00:09:22,229 --> 00:09:24,496 ♪ ♪ 225 00:09:24,498 --> 00:09:27,165 - Hang on, is this the company where i don't raped? 226 00:09:27,167 --> 00:09:30,135 Yeah, here, right? Okay, i'm staying here. 227 00:09:33,407 --> 00:09:35,240 - Is the league just going to sit by 228 00:09:35,242 --> 00:09:38,209 While my team and my players are compared to isis? 229 00:09:38,211 --> 00:09:40,745 You have to do something, commissioner goodell! 230 00:09:40,747 --> 00:09:43,448 What are you going to do about this? 231 00:09:43,450 --> 00:09:45,216 - I will get it right, 232 00:09:45,218 --> 00:09:48,153 And do whatever is necessary to accomplish that. 233 00:09:50,157 --> 00:09:51,623 - What? 234 00:09:51,625 --> 00:09:53,558 - We will continue to identify 235 00:09:53,560 --> 00:09:58,163 And add expertise to our team. 236 00:09:58,165 --> 00:09:59,664 - That's the most ridiculous, nothing answer 237 00:09:59,666 --> 00:10:00,999 I've ever heard. 238 00:10:01,001 --> 00:10:02,500 What are you gonna do now? 239 00:10:02,502 --> 00:10:06,404 - Everyone will participate in education sessions 240 00:10:06,406 --> 00:10:09,341 Starting in the next month. 241 00:10:09,343 --> 00:10:11,409 - Ugh! This thing is broken! 242 00:10:11,411 --> 00:10:14,546 - We can add, and we will do more-- 243 00:10:14,548 --> 00:10:16,748 Do more--do more-- 244 00:10:16,750 --> 00:10:18,383 - Get all the nfl owners on skype! 245 00:10:18,385 --> 00:10:21,119 This thing is broken again! 246 00:10:21,121 --> 00:10:24,255 And so i call upon the help of all owners, 247 00:10:24,257 --> 00:10:27,192 You cannot let my people be belittled like this. 248 00:10:27,194 --> 00:10:29,527 - Dan, you don't want to be dealing with this stuff, 249 00:10:29,529 --> 00:10:30,795 Let the goodell-bot do it. 250 00:10:30,797 --> 00:10:32,697 - The stupid thing isn't working! 251 00:10:32,699 --> 00:10:34,399 - I will get it right. 252 00:10:34,401 --> 00:10:37,168 - Man, that thing hasn't worked right since we bought it. 253 00:10:37,170 --> 00:10:39,638 - Look, my team is starting to lose hope. 254 00:10:39,640 --> 00:10:41,473 You have to use your influence 255 00:10:41,475 --> 00:10:43,441 To make these people change their name. 256 00:10:43,443 --> 00:10:46,277 - Did you tell them we're about honor and integrity? 257 00:10:46,279 --> 00:10:49,214 - If the goodell-bot is broken, we must stay out of it 258 00:10:49,216 --> 00:10:50,515 More than even usual. 259 00:10:50,517 --> 00:10:51,816 - And so i'm alone? 260 00:10:51,818 --> 00:10:54,519 What if they ridicule the 49ers team next? 261 00:10:54,521 --> 00:10:55,687 Or make fun of jerry jones 262 00:10:55,689 --> 00:10:57,155 Because his eyes are too far apart? 263 00:10:57,157 --> 00:10:59,190 - My eyes aren't too far apart. 264 00:10:59,192 --> 00:11:01,126 - If we get them to change their logo, 265 00:11:01,128 --> 00:11:02,560 Will it make you happy? 266 00:11:02,562 --> 00:11:04,562 - I guess we can live with that. 267 00:11:04,564 --> 00:11:06,331 - Then it is decided. 268 00:11:06,333 --> 00:11:08,600 We will make them change their logo. 269 00:11:08,602 --> 00:11:11,269 Begin mass-behind-the-scenes under-the-table enforcement 270 00:11:11,271 --> 00:11:13,705 Of our wishes, now. - All: Go! 271 00:11:15,208 --> 00:11:17,042 - Thank god. 272 00:11:17,044 --> 00:11:23,515 [cheers and applause] 273 00:11:23,517 --> 00:11:26,151 Fuck you, fuck you. 274 00:11:26,153 --> 00:11:27,786 [cheers and applause] 275 00:11:27,788 --> 00:11:30,655 Fuck you out there. Fuck you. 276 00:11:30,657 --> 00:11:32,590 "fuck you." 277 00:11:32,592 --> 00:11:34,659 Those words mean a great deal to us. 278 00:11:34,661 --> 00:11:37,595 They help us express just how we as a company 279 00:11:37,597 --> 00:11:39,597 See things differently. 280 00:11:39,599 --> 00:11:41,299 There are a lot of startup companies on kickstarter, 281 00:11:41,301 --> 00:11:42,767 But after today, i think you'll agree 282 00:11:42,769 --> 00:11:45,370 That washington redskins is the most exciting. 283 00:11:45,372 --> 00:11:47,372 As you know, the redskins have been 284 00:11:47,374 --> 00:11:49,107 On the forefront of kickstarter as a company 285 00:11:49,109 --> 00:11:51,543 That is always finding new and exciting ways 286 00:11:51,545 --> 00:11:53,144 To tell people to go fuck themselves. 287 00:11:53,146 --> 00:11:55,447 And now, our company is thrilled to show you 288 00:11:55,449 --> 00:11:58,116 All the latest innovations we've come up with. 289 00:11:58,118 --> 00:12:00,318 To begin with, we have moved the couch 290 00:12:00,320 --> 00:12:03,188 From the left side of the office to the right side. 291 00:12:03,190 --> 00:12:05,623 But we didn't stop there. We also added a new rug 292 00:12:05,625 --> 00:12:07,759 That goes better with our office drapes. 293 00:12:07,761 --> 00:12:10,061 And probably most exciting of all, 294 00:12:10,063 --> 00:12:14,065 We have actually updated the company from the inside out. 295 00:12:14,067 --> 00:12:16,401 We received a lot of pressure from certain communities 296 00:12:16,403 --> 00:12:18,136 To change our redskins logo. 297 00:12:18,138 --> 00:12:22,240 As a company we want to be firm, but we also want to be flexible, 298 00:12:22,242 --> 00:12:24,142 And so we thought if we have to change our logo, 299 00:12:24,144 --> 00:12:26,244 It should be more in step with today's times 300 00:12:26,246 --> 00:12:29,013 But still define us as the leading kickstarter company. 301 00:12:29,015 --> 00:12:31,683 What we came up with is the new company logo 302 00:12:31,685 --> 00:12:34,719 That i think you'll all agree is very exciting. 303 00:12:34,721 --> 00:12:39,791 [cheers and applause] 304 00:12:39,793 --> 00:12:42,026 - Now when people hear the name "redskins," 305 00:12:42,028 --> 00:12:44,429 They will immediately think "titties" and "balls." 306 00:12:44,431 --> 00:12:46,431 It's just a bold new way that we can say 307 00:12:46,433 --> 00:12:48,600 "we don't fucking care." go redskins! 308 00:12:48,602 --> 00:12:52,403 [cheers and applause] 309 00:12:52,405 --> 00:12:55,106 - It's so awesome, dude. 310 00:12:55,108 --> 00:12:57,075 Our company already has a hundred backers, 311 00:12:57,077 --> 00:12:59,778 And we still have 14 days to go! 312 00:12:59,780 --> 00:13:01,379 - Yeah. 313 00:13:01,381 --> 00:13:03,448 - You okay, bro? 314 00:13:03,450 --> 00:13:06,351 - I just...Never saw myself owning a company called 315 00:13:06,353 --> 00:13:08,653 "furry balls plopped menacingly on the table." 316 00:13:08,655 --> 00:13:10,755 - Give it time, it'll grow on you. 317 00:13:10,757 --> 00:13:13,158 - Why don't we just call it "untitled startup company." 318 00:13:13,160 --> 00:13:15,193 - Because that sounds like we don't have anything. 319 00:13:15,195 --> 00:13:16,594 We've been through this already, stan. 320 00:13:16,596 --> 00:13:18,463 - Yeah, i know that, 321 00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:22,233 But a good company should never have seven words in its title. 322 00:13:22,235 --> 00:13:23,368 - What do you mean? 323 00:13:23,370 --> 00:13:25,069 - I just feel that somewhere out there, 324 00:13:25,071 --> 00:13:28,373 There's a perfect startup company name, 325 00:13:28,375 --> 00:13:31,142 And i need to be free to go find it. 326 00:13:31,144 --> 00:13:33,578 - Oh. 327 00:13:33,580 --> 00:13:35,647 Well, i certainly don't want you to feel 328 00:13:35,649 --> 00:13:37,248 That furry balls plopped menacingly on the table 329 00:13:37,250 --> 00:13:39,250 Is holding you back. 330 00:13:42,522 --> 00:13:44,556 - Good luck with your company, dude. 331 00:13:44,558 --> 00:13:47,358 - Yeah. Good luck with yours. 332 00:13:51,498 --> 00:13:54,499 [people murmuring] 333 00:13:54,501 --> 00:13:56,801 - It's just incredible, harry. 334 00:13:56,803 --> 00:13:59,137 Everyone is using kickstarter for everything! 335 00:13:59,139 --> 00:14:02,307 - And for every project funded, we get 5%. 336 00:14:02,309 --> 00:14:04,542 - It's like, we don't even have to do anything 337 00:14:04,544 --> 00:14:06,277 And we just make money. 338 00:14:06,279 --> 00:14:09,080 - Sitting on our asses, here we come. 339 00:14:09,082 --> 00:14:11,683 [tribal drum music] 340 00:14:11,685 --> 00:14:14,052 ♪ ♪ 341 00:14:14,054 --> 00:14:16,321 - Caw-caw. Caw-caw 342 00:14:16,323 --> 00:14:20,024 ♪ ♪ 343 00:14:20,026 --> 00:14:21,759 Hoo-hoo. Hoo-hoo-hoo. 344 00:14:21,761 --> 00:14:29,767 ♪ ♪ 345 00:14:31,605 --> 00:14:33,404 - Huh? 346 00:14:41,414 --> 00:14:42,413 [bones breaking] 347 00:14:47,687 --> 00:14:50,688 [native american chanting] 348 00:14:50,690 --> 00:14:58,663 ♪ ♪ 349 00:14:58,665 --> 00:15:00,064 - [screams] 350 00:15:00,066 --> 00:15:03,368 [chanting continues] 351 00:15:07,207 --> 00:15:09,607 - Go-o-ood morning, guys! 352 00:15:09,609 --> 00:15:12,210 - Happy deadline day! - We made it, guys. 353 00:15:12,212 --> 00:15:13,578 We can finally stop doing stuff, 354 00:15:13,580 --> 00:15:15,380 And see just how much our company made 355 00:15:15,382 --> 00:15:18,583 In four, three, two, one... That's the deadline! 356 00:15:20,420 --> 00:15:22,587 - Oh, boy, this is like christmas morning! 357 00:15:22,589 --> 00:15:23,988 [beep] 358 00:15:23,990 --> 00:15:26,257 - What the hell? "can't find the server"? 359 00:15:26,259 --> 00:15:28,359 Kickstarter.Com. 360 00:15:28,361 --> 00:15:29,661 [beep] 361 00:15:29,663 --> 00:15:31,462 Kickstarter, where is kickstarter? 362 00:15:31,464 --> 00:15:33,131 Get it up on your phone, butters. 363 00:15:33,133 --> 00:15:34,599 Come on, i want to know how much our company is worth! 364 00:15:34,601 --> 00:15:36,501 - It's not coming up on my phone either, i-- 365 00:15:36,503 --> 00:15:38,086 Holy mother mary! 366 00:15:38,087 --> 00:15:39,670 - [muffled] what? - Somebody raided kickstarter 367 00:15:39,673 --> 00:15:41,239 And they burned the building to the ground! 368 00:15:41,241 --> 00:15:43,708 - What? - Somebody killed kickstarter! 369 00:15:43,710 --> 00:15:46,210 - Who the hell would burn kickstarter to the ground? 370 00:15:46,212 --> 00:15:48,346 [gasps] oh, my god! 371 00:15:48,348 --> 00:15:51,282 That weird, little, jewy guy! 372 00:15:51,284 --> 00:15:53,017 Kyle! 373 00:15:53,019 --> 00:15:54,385 [dramatic music] 374 00:15:59,125 --> 00:16:00,591 - What the hell is wrong? 375 00:16:00,593 --> 00:16:04,028 "can't find the server"? Kickstarter. 376 00:16:04,030 --> 00:16:06,331 - You son of a bitch! - What? 377 00:16:06,333 --> 00:16:09,667 - You broke kickstarter! - No, i just can't get it load. 378 00:16:09,669 --> 00:16:11,402 - Nobody can, it's gone! 379 00:16:11,404 --> 00:16:12,737 You just couldn't take it that our company 380 00:16:12,739 --> 00:16:14,272 Was more successful than yours would ever be! 381 00:16:14,274 --> 00:16:16,240 - My company was on kickstarter too! 382 00:16:16,242 --> 00:16:18,009 Why would i get rid of it? - Well, somebody did! 383 00:16:18,011 --> 00:16:21,179 - It doesn't matter, you guys. 384 00:16:21,181 --> 00:16:24,449 There's something a lot more important here. 385 00:16:24,451 --> 00:16:26,117 Do you guys remember when we first decided 386 00:16:26,119 --> 00:16:28,119 To start a company together? 387 00:16:28,121 --> 00:16:30,054 We all had a common goal, 388 00:16:30,056 --> 00:16:31,456 And we weren't gonna let anything stop us 389 00:16:31,458 --> 00:16:33,524 From getting to the bro down. 390 00:16:33,526 --> 00:16:35,293 But somewhere between starting up and selling out, 391 00:16:35,295 --> 00:16:38,196 We--we lost our way. 392 00:16:38,198 --> 00:16:41,432 We can't do this on our own. We need each other. 393 00:16:41,434 --> 00:16:44,002 - He's right. We should do a merger. 394 00:16:44,004 --> 00:16:45,570 - A merger? 395 00:16:45,572 --> 00:16:48,106 It's too late for that, you guys, kickstarter is gone! 396 00:16:48,108 --> 00:16:51,109 We don't have a company! We don't have anything! 397 00:16:51,111 --> 00:16:53,277 - Yes, we do. 398 00:16:53,279 --> 00:16:56,080 We have a sweet name. 399 00:16:59,386 --> 00:17:01,352 - I was wrong, cartman. 400 00:17:01,354 --> 00:17:03,521 "washington redskins" is the perfect name. 401 00:17:03,523 --> 00:17:06,457 I think maybe i was just jealous that i didn't come up with it. 402 00:17:06,459 --> 00:17:08,626 - [sighs] 403 00:17:08,628 --> 00:17:10,461 It is really sweet. 404 00:17:10,463 --> 00:17:13,031 - And we always said that all we needed was a sweet name 405 00:17:13,033 --> 00:17:15,066 And the rest would figure itself out. 406 00:17:15,068 --> 00:17:18,136 - Yeah, we can do it, fellas! It'll be like old times! 407 00:17:18,138 --> 00:17:21,139 - What do you say, cartman? 408 00:17:22,175 --> 00:17:25,476 [cheers and applause] 409 00:17:25,478 --> 00:17:28,546 - Fuck you! 410 00:17:28,548 --> 00:17:30,681 Fuck you, everyone! 411 00:17:30,683 --> 00:17:33,251 Yes, fuck you all, thanks! 412 00:17:33,253 --> 00:17:35,653 How do you stay relevant in a volatile marketplace? 413 00:17:35,655 --> 00:17:38,456 As you know, our goal at washington redskins 414 00:17:38,458 --> 00:17:40,992 Is to not to anything, and make money not doing it. 415 00:17:40,994 --> 00:17:42,393 - When kickstarter went down, 416 00:17:42,395 --> 00:17:44,429 Many saw their startup projects die, 417 00:17:44,431 --> 00:17:47,665 But here at washington redskins, we saw opportunity. 418 00:17:47,667 --> 00:17:49,333 People still need a way to raise money 419 00:17:49,335 --> 00:17:50,735 For their stupid startup projects, 420 00:17:50,737 --> 00:17:54,272 And with the redskins, you can now go fund yourself. 421 00:17:54,274 --> 00:17:56,074 And the idea is simple. 422 00:17:56,076 --> 00:17:59,077 You, the people, go out and raise all your own money, 423 00:17:59,079 --> 00:18:01,112 And give the washington redskins 5%. 424 00:18:01,114 --> 00:18:02,447 - You will literally be giving us money 425 00:18:02,449 --> 00:18:04,449 For doing absolutely nothing. 426 00:18:04,451 --> 00:18:06,717 It is the biggest fuck you we have ever come up with. 427 00:18:06,719 --> 00:18:08,419 But we didn't stop there, 428 00:18:08,421 --> 00:18:10,421 Because a new company direction also means of course, 429 00:18:10,423 --> 00:18:12,657 A new and improved logo. 430 00:18:12,659 --> 00:18:17,161 [cheers and applause] 431 00:18:17,163 --> 00:18:19,664 Both: Go redskins! 432 00:18:19,666 --> 00:18:22,100 - A beautiful night in arlington, texas, 433 00:18:22,102 --> 00:18:25,403 As the dallas cowboys get set to take on the washington redskins. 434 00:18:25,405 --> 00:18:27,105 That is, of course, washington redskins 435 00:18:27,107 --> 00:18:29,340 The football team, not washington redskins 436 00:18:29,342 --> 00:18:31,309 The audacious crowd funding company. 437 00:18:31,311 --> 00:18:34,011 - Yeah, and if you ask me, the redskins are a scam. 438 00:18:34,013 --> 00:18:35,379 - You're talking about the crowd funding company 439 00:18:35,381 --> 00:18:36,647 Redskins. - That's right, 440 00:18:36,649 --> 00:18:39,150 And now you've got terrorist groups like isis 441 00:18:39,152 --> 00:18:41,152 Using the redskins to raise their money. 442 00:18:41,154 --> 00:18:43,121 I don't like what the redskins are doing. 443 00:18:43,123 --> 00:18:45,423 - Those redskins. - Yeah, whatever. 444 00:18:45,425 --> 00:18:48,259 [somber native american music] 445 00:18:48,261 --> 00:18:50,678 - It's over. 446 00:18:50,679 --> 00:18:53,096 Our name has been reduced to a stereotype and a joke. 447 00:18:53,099 --> 00:18:56,434 - Yeah, let's just go home. - No. 448 00:18:56,436 --> 00:18:58,169 No, we cannot give up! 449 00:18:58,171 --> 00:19:00,138 We have been through too much together! 450 00:19:00,140 --> 00:19:02,340 We have fought eagle and bear! 451 00:19:02,342 --> 00:19:04,709 The eagles only beat us by three points! 452 00:19:04,711 --> 00:19:07,645 - Yeah, but i just feel stupid wearing this now. 453 00:19:07,647 --> 00:19:10,982 - Yeah. - Come on, guys. 454 00:19:10,984 --> 00:19:13,484 - Where will we go? What will we do? 455 00:19:13,486 --> 00:19:17,522 - Don't let them break you! Don't let them win! 456 00:19:17,524 --> 00:19:20,525 [native american drumming] 457 00:19:20,527 --> 00:19:23,027 ♪ ♪ 458 00:19:23,029 --> 00:19:25,129 - And the cowboys are still set to kick off, 459 00:19:25,131 --> 00:19:27,265 But there doesn't seem to be anyone to kick off to. 460 00:19:27,267 --> 00:19:29,734 - Yeah, and jerry jones must be happy. 461 00:19:29,736 --> 00:19:32,570 This means a forfeit, another win for the cowboys. 462 00:19:32,572 --> 00:19:34,405 - Wait a minute, it appears a lone redskin 463 00:19:34,407 --> 00:19:35,606 Is making his way out of the locker room. 464 00:19:35,608 --> 00:19:42,613 ♪ ♪ 465 00:19:42,615 --> 00:19:45,416 [mellow native american music] 466 00:19:45,418 --> 00:19:47,218 ♪ ♪ 467 00:19:47,220 --> 00:19:48,553 - [blows whistle] 468 00:19:48,555 --> 00:19:50,321 - The cowboys kick it off. 469 00:19:50,323 --> 00:19:53,257 ♪ ♪ 470 00:19:53,259 --> 00:19:55,259 - [grunting] 471 00:19:55,261 --> 00:20:01,265 [cheers and applause] 472 00:20:01,267 --> 00:20:02,567 ♪ ♪ 473 00:20:02,569 --> 00:20:05,770 Hut! Hut hut hut! 474 00:20:05,772 --> 00:20:08,272 [all grunting] 475 00:20:08,274 --> 00:20:11,209 ♪ ♪ 476 00:20:11,211 --> 00:20:14,245 Hut hut hut. Hut hut hut hut! 477 00:20:14,247 --> 00:20:16,113 [all grunting] 478 00:20:16,115 --> 00:20:20,284 [whimpering and coughing] 479 00:20:20,286 --> 00:20:24,455 Hut. Hut hut hut. Hut hut! 480 00:20:24,457 --> 00:20:26,224 [all grunting] 481 00:20:26,226 --> 00:20:27,792 All: Oh! 482 00:20:27,794 --> 00:20:30,628 - Just stay down, for the love of god! 483 00:20:30,630 --> 00:20:34,165 - [feebly] hut hut. Hut! 484 00:20:34,167 --> 00:20:36,167 [all grunting] 485 00:20:36,169 --> 00:20:38,636 - Stop! Make it stop! - Just stay down! 486 00:20:38,638 --> 00:20:40,204 - Please, just make him stay down! 487 00:20:40,206 --> 00:20:42,373 - Go redskins! - Go redskins! 488 00:20:46,746 --> 00:20:48,779 - Boy, this is the life, huh, guys? 489 00:20:48,781 --> 00:20:50,448 - We finally did it! 490 00:20:50,450 --> 00:20:54,185 - I might just sit here until my ass fuses into the couch. 491 00:20:55,755 --> 00:20:57,755 - What the hell is that? 492 00:20:58,758 --> 00:21:03,227 [crowd booing] 493 00:21:03,229 --> 00:21:04,328 - Whoa, whoa! What? 494 00:21:04,330 --> 00:21:06,130 - Change your name! 495 00:21:06,132 --> 00:21:08,332 - It doesn't belong in today's society! 496 00:21:08,334 --> 00:21:10,101 - Change our name? 497 00:21:10,103 --> 00:21:12,587 - But you all thought our name was sweet. 498 00:21:12,588 --> 00:21:15,072 - There's nothing sweet about a people who were decimated, 499 00:21:15,074 --> 00:21:18,209 A once proud nation that finally lost hope 500 00:21:18,211 --> 00:21:20,444 And left their leader to be massacred by cowboys 501 00:21:20,446 --> 00:21:22,213 In a defiant last stand. 502 00:21:22,215 --> 00:21:23,748 - When was this? 503 00:21:23,750 --> 00:21:25,650 - Last night. 504 00:21:25,652 --> 00:21:28,119 - Until you change your name, we are asking 505 00:21:28,121 --> 00:21:30,521 All your subscribers to boycott you! 506 00:21:30,523 --> 00:21:32,223 - That's right. 507 00:21:32,225 --> 00:21:35,493 Isis will no longer use your insensitive company 508 00:21:35,495 --> 00:21:36,761 For its fund-raising. 509 00:21:36,763 --> 00:21:38,195 - Yeah! - All right! 510 00:21:38,197 --> 00:21:39,430 - Good for you, isis! 511 00:21:39,432 --> 00:21:41,299 - What the hell do we do? 512 00:21:41,301 --> 00:21:43,100 - [sighs] 513 00:21:43,102 --> 00:21:46,637 I guess we gotta go back to school. 514 00:21:46,639 --> 00:21:49,740 [crowd yelling] 515 00:21:53,680 --> 00:21:55,346 [cheers and applause] 516 00:21:55,348 --> 00:21:57,381 - Now when people hear the name "redskins," 517 00:21:57,383 --> 00:21:59,784 They will immediately think "titties" and "balls." 518 00:21:59,786 --> 00:22:01,719 It's just a bold new way that we can say 519 00:22:01,721 --> 00:22:04,288 "we don't fucking care." go redskins! 520 00:22:04,290 --> 00:22:06,624 [cheers and applause]