1 00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:39,400 Chanukah, Chanukah, sivivon, sov, sov 2 00:00:39,807 --> 00:00:40,653 I gotta go tinkle. 3 00:00:40,800 --> 00:00:41,868 No Ike! Shh! 4 00:00:42,347 --> 00:00:43,930 Sov, sov, sov! Sov, sov, sov! Ma nayim vi-tov. 5 00:00:44,884 --> 00:00:47,377 We thank God for our blessings this Chanukah. 6 00:00:47,378 --> 00:00:52,602 Our little family is so loving, and perfect, and nothing will ever tear us apart. 7 00:00:54,377 --> 00:00:55,732 I'll get it. 8 00:00:57,840 --> 00:00:59,113 Gerald Broflovski? 9 00:00:59,114 --> 00:00:59,926 Yes? 10 00:00:59,961 --> 00:01:03,737 My name is Harry Gints and this is my wife Elise. We're from Canada. 11 00:01:04,264 --> 00:01:06,292 Yes, I can tell. 12 00:01:06,327 --> 00:01:11,679 My wife and I had a child a few years back, and, we weren't ready to have a child, so we put him up for adoption. 13 00:01:11,680 --> 00:01:13,253 We were told that you might be the- 14 00:01:13,254 --> 00:01:17,819 Peter! Oh God, Harry! It's our son! Peter, it's Mommy. 15 00:01:18,499 --> 00:01:20,116 Gerald, what the hell is going on? 16 00:01:20,151 --> 00:01:21,504 I I'm not sure. 17 00:01:22,445 --> 00:01:25,915 It was a tough time for us. It was a tough time for all of Canada. 18 00:01:25,916 --> 00:01:28,677 The whole country was devastated by the cola wars. 19 00:01:28,678 --> 00:01:30,904 It just seemed we couldn't take care of a baby. 20 00:01:31,082 --> 00:01:33,762 So we put him up for adoption. But as the years passed, I, 21 00:01:33,763 --> 00:01:37,501 I just felt an emptiness in my heart. Oh it's so good to see him. 22 00:01:37,693 --> 00:01:41,724 Well we wish you all the best, Mr. and Mrs. Gints, but to be honest, 23 00:01:41,725 --> 00:01:45,593 I think it would be best for Ike if you didn't come around again. 24 00:01:45,730 --> 00:01:49,197 I don't think you understand. We didn't come to visit Peter, 25 00:01:49,198 --> 00:01:50,198 ...we came to take him back. 26 00:01:51,197 --> 00:01:51,947 What? 27 00:01:51,982 --> 00:01:54,018 We want to take Peter home, to Canada. 28 00:01:54,304 --> 00:01:55,501 Are you crazy?! 29 00:01:55,536 --> 00:01:58,847 Look, you gave Ike up. You can't just change your mind. 30 00:01:58,882 --> 00:02:01,445 Changing your mind is a Canadian custom that we hold quite dear. 31 00:02:01,446 --> 00:02:07,188 And besides, the new Canadian Prime Minister has issued a decree that all adopted Canadians must be returned home. 32 00:02:07,396 --> 00:02:09,570 The new Canadian Prime Minister? 33 00:02:09,605 --> 00:02:11,270 Look, Ike is our son now! 34 00:02:11,305 --> 00:02:15,159 He doesn't belong here. He belongs in Canada with his own kind. 35 00:02:15,194 --> 00:02:16,828 I think you'd better leave. 36 00:02:16,863 --> 00:02:18,669 Please, don't make things any harder for Peter. 37 00:02:18,704 --> 00:02:24,814 Harder for Peter?! Now you two just blow in here and say you're gonna haul him back to Canada, and we're being hard on Peter?! 38 00:02:24,849 --> 00:02:27,130 We're prepared to go to court! We had hoped it wouldn't come to that! 39 00:02:27,165 --> 00:02:28,995 Well you bet your ass it'll come to that! 40 00:02:31,480 --> 00:02:33,363 I'm sorry to say that my hands are tied. 41 00:02:33,364 --> 00:02:37,195 The new Prime Minister of Canada has authority this court cannot override. 42 00:02:37,196 --> 00:02:41,434 By Canadian law I must award custody of the child to his birth parents. 43 00:02:41,455 --> 00:02:42,381 Yes! 44 00:02:42,416 --> 00:02:43,271 Yes! 45 00:02:43,306 --> 00:02:44,016 No! 46 00:02:44,051 --> 00:02:45,919 Ike's not my little brother anymore? 47 00:02:46,248 --> 00:02:47,733 Gerald, do something! 48 00:02:47,768 --> 00:02:48,955 There's nothing I can do. 49 00:02:52,568 --> 00:02:56,636 Good-bye, Ike. You... be a good bye, huh? 50 00:02:56,637 --> 00:02:59,298 You... remember all the things we taught you. 51 00:03:01,781 --> 00:03:04,983 Ike, you'll always be my little brother, okay? 52 00:03:05,018 --> 00:03:06,396 Come on, Peter, we should get going. 53 00:03:07,040 --> 00:03:07,746 No! 54 00:03:08,621 --> 00:03:10,528 Peter, you must come with Mommy and Daddy. 55 00:03:10,563 --> 00:03:12,151 No no no no no! 56 00:03:13,009 --> 00:03:14,289 I have some chocolate. 57 00:03:14,686 --> 00:03:15,951 Chocolate! 58 00:03:17,785 --> 00:03:19,530 We're going to take good care of him. 59 00:03:19,565 --> 00:03:20,684 You'd better! 60 00:03:32,264 --> 00:03:35,165 Dad, can't we talk to this new Canadian Prime Minister? 61 00:03:35,166 --> 00:03:36,892 if he knew the situation, he might e- 62 00:03:36,893 --> 00:03:42,406 Oh! Kyle, appealing to the Prime Minister of Canada would take... time and money we don't have. 63 00:03:47,298 --> 00:03:51,252 Dude, look at that. Sprinkle Time Make Your Own Marshmallow Factory. 64 00:03:51,744 --> 00:03:52,253 I'm definitely asking for that for Christmas. 65 00:03:53,935 --> 00:03:57,576 Dude, I'm gonna tell my parents to get me that John Elway doll with the karate-chop action. 66 00:03:58,873 --> 00:04:00,544 Guys. Guys, I need your help. 67 00:04:00,579 --> 00:04:01,402 Sure dude. 68 00:04:01,437 --> 00:04:04,844 It's been a week since Ike's been gone, and every day my parents seem worse. 69 00:04:04,845 --> 00:04:09,164 I have to try to go to Canada and speak with the new Canadian Prime Minister, but I can't do it alone. 70 00:04:09,324 --> 00:04:11,405 We can't go to Canada, dumbass! It's Christmas! 71 00:04:11,440 --> 00:04:14,018 Yeah, dude. What if we miss out on some great Christmas adventure? 72 00:04:14,053 --> 00:04:17,508 Please, you guys, you don't understand. My family is devastated. 73 00:04:17,509 --> 00:04:20,624 My mom just walks around the house like a zombie, and my dad can't stop crying. 74 00:04:20,701 --> 00:04:22,858 Well, I didn't wanna say anything, Kyle, 75 00:04:22,859 --> 00:04:23,859 ...but I think this is what your family gets for being Jewish at Christmastime. 76 00:04:26,506 --> 00:04:27,258 Dude, Cartman. 77 00:04:27,293 --> 00:04:30,358 I'm just saying, maybe Jesus is having a little revenge, that's all. 78 00:04:30,393 --> 00:04:34,056 I found the number for a really cheap airline to Canada. If we go as soon as possible, then- 79 00:04:34,091 --> 00:04:35,992 Dude, we just can't up and go to Canada. 80 00:04:35,993 --> 00:04:37,783 Look, they're about to light the Christmas tree. 81 00:04:37,784 --> 00:04:39,665 Maybe you can get your brother back some other way. 82 00:04:43,800 --> 00:04:46,989 Kyle, I just want you to know, if it were any other time of the year, 83 00:04:46,990 --> 00:04:48,524 ...I still wouldn't help you. 84 00:04:51,907 --> 00:04:57,433 Three! Two! One! Yaaaaay! 85 00:04:57,468 --> 00:05:01,315 As we celebrate this glorious time, we can't forget those families who are suffering. 86 00:05:01,316 --> 00:05:06,067 As many of you know, the Broflovski family has recently had their child torn away from them. 87 00:05:06,068 --> 00:05:09,166 As a community, we must do all we can to ease their pain. 88 00:05:09,167 --> 00:05:11,784 Are there any suggestions how we might help? 89 00:05:13,431 --> 00:05:15,931 How about, we get rid of all the Mexicans? 90 00:05:18,281 --> 00:05:21,275 Mr. Garrison, every Christmas you suggest we get rid of all the Mexicans, 91 00:05:21,276 --> 00:05:23,327 ...and every Christmas we tell you "NO!" 92 00:05:23,510 --> 00:05:24,301 Rats! 93 00:05:24,861 --> 00:05:28,688 The Broflovskis need money to appeal that case to the new Canadian Prime Minister. 94 00:05:28,689 --> 00:05:33,960 What if this Christmas, instead of buyin' presents, we all use that money to give to the Broflovskis? 95 00:05:34,087 --> 00:05:38,290 HA! Yeah, right! Like our parents aren't gonna buy us presents for Christmas! 96 00:05:38,325 --> 00:05:40,217 That's a great idea, Chef. 97 00:05:40,252 --> 00:05:40,904 What? 98 00:05:40,939 --> 00:05:42,798 Yeah. Who needs more stuff, anyway? 99 00:05:42,799 --> 00:05:43,799 This Christmas we can do somethin' that really matters! 100 00:05:45,720 --> 00:05:47,051 Dad, don't get carried away. 101 00:05:47,086 --> 00:05:50,833 Then it's settled: This year we'll give all our Christmas money to the Broflovskis, 102 00:05:50,834 --> 00:05:53,821 ...in hopes that they may someday have their child returned to them. 103 00:05:55,906 --> 00:05:57,497 No! No, this can't be happening! 104 00:06:04,594 --> 00:06:07,607 You fucking asshole!! This is all your fault!! 105 00:06:07,649 --> 00:06:08,348 What? 106 00:06:08,383 --> 00:06:12,560 Everyone's gonna be charitable and give money to your family instead of buying Christmas presents!! 107 00:06:12,561 --> 00:06:13,561 You fucking Jews ruined Christmas again!! 108 00:06:16,087 --> 00:06:16,909 Whoa whoa, Cartman. 109 00:06:16,944 --> 00:06:21,242 It wasn't enough for you people to kill Jesus, now you have to kill Christmas too, huh?! 110 00:06:21,277 --> 00:06:22,245 Cartman, calm down! 111 00:06:22,280 --> 00:06:23,229 Is that true? 112 00:06:23,264 --> 00:06:24,936 It's true, dude. Christmas is ruined. 113 00:06:25,763 --> 00:06:26,781 This is it, Kyle. 114 00:06:26,782 --> 00:06:29,308 You and me. We're throwin' down. Right now. 115 00:06:29,343 --> 00:06:31,602 I'm sorry you guys, but there is something we can do. 116 00:06:31,603 --> 00:06:34,211 We can go to Canada and see the Prime Minister like I said. 117 00:06:34,212 --> 00:06:38,292 If we can change his mind before Christmas, then your parents won't have to give my family money. 118 00:06:38,369 --> 00:06:40,895 You really think if we go to Canada we might still get Christmas presents? 119 00:06:40,930 --> 00:06:43,647 It's worth a shot. Come on, you guys, we can do this. 120 00:06:44,144 --> 00:06:47,346 Oh all right, but we'd better not miss out on great Christmas adventures. 121 00:06:47,381 --> 00:06:48,923 We'll get back in time for a Christmas adventure. 122 00:06:49,317 --> 00:06:53,569 Fine. But if it doesn't work, you and me are gonna have it out, Kyle. Once and for all. 123 00:06:58,285 --> 00:07:03,892 No business... Christmastime come anda nobody wanna eata Chinese food. 124 00:07:05,598 --> 00:07:08,008 Looks like I might as well close. 125 00:07:09,716 --> 00:07:12,528 Oh boy! Some business! Finally! 126 00:07:12,529 --> 00:07:16,166 Herro? Shitty Wok, take ur orda prease! 127 00:07:16,201 --> 00:07:19,141 Uh, I must have the wrong number. We were trying to reach City Airlines. 128 00:07:19,176 --> 00:07:21,148 Oh, oh yes, just a moment prease. 129 00:07:23,081 --> 00:07:26,066 Herro, Shitty Airrines. Can I help you take ur orda prease? 130 00:07:26,221 --> 00:07:28,879 Uh, we need to go to Canada. As soon as possible. 131 00:07:28,914 --> 00:07:31,760 Oooh, Canada. Okay, that's uh pretty far. 132 00:07:31,761 --> 00:07:35,207 Gonna cost ya a rot of money... hmlet's she. How many people? 133 00:07:35,372 --> 00:07:36,169 Four. 134 00:07:36,204 --> 00:07:42,613 Okay. Four people, Canada, cost a rot of money, that uh gonna be about ah six thousand five hundred daura. 135 00:07:43,336 --> 00:07:44,722 How about fifty daura? 136 00:07:45,756 --> 00:07:50,565 Fifty daura?! You flighn to Canada cost at reast three thousand daura! 137 00:07:51,158 --> 00:07:52,335 Fifty-five daura. 138 00:07:52,856 --> 00:07:55,816 Hey! Stop wasting my time wa fifty-five daura! 139 00:07:55,817 --> 00:07:59,335 No way I take my plane to Canada for less than a thousand daura! 140 00:07:59,720 --> 00:08:01,959 Okay. Sixty daura. 141 00:08:01,994 --> 00:08:03,567 Sixty-two daura. 142 00:08:03,602 --> 00:08:04,503 Okay. 143 00:08:04,538 --> 00:08:08,849 Okay. Meet me Park County Airfield, yellow Cessna, tail number 432G. 144 00:08:08,850 --> 00:08:09,882 Got it. 145 00:08:09,917 --> 00:08:13,196 Hehehehe, never try to barter with a Chinese man. 146 00:08:15,834 --> 00:08:18,532 We have exactly fifty-two hours before Christmas. 147 00:08:18,533 --> 00:08:22,953 That means we have to be back in twenty-eight hours to still give our patents twenty-four hours to buy us presents. 148 00:08:22,954 --> 00:08:25,227 Synchronize watches on my mark. Mark! 149 00:08:26,241 --> 00:08:28,300 Herro, welcome Shitty Airrine. 150 00:08:29,190 --> 00:08:31,866 Oh no, no no nono, I am NOT flying in that thing! 151 00:08:31,901 --> 00:08:32,494 (Me neither!) 152 00:08:32,495 --> 00:08:33,553 Why not? 153 00:08:33,588 --> 00:08:34,551 ('Cause, dude, I'll fuckin' die!) 154 00:08:34,586 --> 00:08:36,557 You're not gonna die, Kenny. Don't be stupid. 155 00:08:36,947 --> 00:08:39,604 You guys go get Ike. Kenny and I will stay here and watch the fort. 156 00:08:39,897 --> 00:08:42,173 No, you're both coming. Do you care about Christmas or not? 157 00:08:42,208 --> 00:08:45,163 Of course I care about Christmas- Doh, Christ on a stick! 158 00:08:47,925 --> 00:08:50,088 Aw dude, it smells like Kung Pao chicken in here! 159 00:08:50,123 --> 00:08:53,690 Okay, welcome aboard Shitty Airrines. This is your captain speaking. 160 00:08:53,691 --> 00:08:57,358 Rooking about a two hour fright. I'll be turning on the seatbelt sign now. 161 00:08:57,359 --> 00:09:00,240 If your seats have seatbelts, this is the time you will fasten them. 162 00:09:00,241 --> 00:09:03,493 Please sit back, relax, and enjoy your Shitty fright. 163 00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:13,048 All right! We're going to Canada! 164 00:09:13,083 --> 00:09:14,544 Sweet. 165 00:09:29,701 --> 00:09:31,491 Hey, turn off the right. ...Wha- oh! 166 00:09:33,969 --> 00:09:34,833 What's going on?? 167 00:09:35,521 --> 00:09:38,327 Herro from the cockpit, this is your captain speaking. 168 00:09:38,328 --> 00:09:40,804 As you can see, it appears that we are goin' down. 169 00:09:40,805 --> 00:09:45,510 Now would be a good time to refrect on your rife, and pray to whatever deity you bereive in. 170 00:09:45,511 --> 00:09:49,048 Thank you for flying Shitty Airlines. We know you have a choice in airlines, 171 00:09:49,049 --> 00:09:50,705 ...and it looks like you made the wrong one. 172 00:09:51,597 --> 00:09:53,442 Hey, where the hell are you going?? 173 00:09:54,913 --> 00:09:55,836 Do something, Kyle! 174 00:09:55,871 --> 00:09:56,781 I'm trying! 175 00:09:57,299 --> 00:09:58,571 Look out! 176 00:10:11,100 --> 00:10:14,103 You guys, I don't think we're in America anymore. 177 00:10:18,102 --> 00:10:21,152 Eh-xcuse me? Uh, is this an invasion? 178 00:10:21,838 --> 00:10:22,751 No. 179 00:10:22,786 --> 00:10:26,461 Oh thank heavens! It's okay. Everyone, it's not an invasion! 180 00:10:31,400 --> 00:10:33,390 Hey! We're in Canada! 181 00:10:33,391 --> 00:10:37,020 Well of course you are! And Canada Friends welcomes you! 182 00:10:38,447 --> 00:10:41,307 Welcome, friend, to Canada! Canada Friends loves you! 183 00:10:41,342 --> 00:10:44,491 We're just like any other country without the big tattoo! 184 00:10:44,526 --> 00:10:47,882 We greet thee with pleasure, but one question, if we may? 185 00:10:47,917 --> 00:10:50,873 What brings you folks to Canada? Why are you here today? 186 00:10:52,849 --> 00:10:55,671 Uh. My adopted brother got taken back here to Canada? 187 00:10:55,965 --> 00:10:59,591 So, we want to talk to the new Canadian Prime Minister about getting him back? 188 00:10:59,711 --> 00:11:02,930 His brother is our quest. The question is, is what? 189 00:11:02,931 --> 00:11:06,301 You must talk to the new Prime Minister if you think his brother's home's back there. 190 00:11:06,305 --> 00:11:07,853 Oh Jesus Christ. 191 00:11:08,242 --> 00:11:09,958 Hey! What the hell is going on?! 192 00:11:09,993 --> 00:11:11,533 It's Scott! 193 00:11:15,001 --> 00:11:17,098 Who damaged our beloved Canadian land?! 194 00:11:17,133 --> 00:11:18,003 Who's that? 195 00:11:18,038 --> 00:11:19,288 That's Scott! He's a dick! 196 00:11:20,686 --> 00:11:23,258 A-ha! Americans! I should've known! 197 00:11:23,259 --> 00:11:25,804 You think you're the police of the world! You think you own Canada! 198 00:11:25,805 --> 00:11:28,139 Well, you aren't welcome here! Get out now! 199 00:11:28,302 --> 00:11:30,502 Oh no you don't, Scott! Leave these boys alone! 200 00:11:30,956 --> 00:11:34,261 This isn't over, you American scum! I swear to God: you'll rue this day!! 201 00:11:36,524 --> 00:11:37,607 God, what a dick! 202 00:11:38,204 --> 00:11:40,161 Look, we don't have a lot of time here, okay? 203 00:11:40,162 --> 00:11:41,162 Can you just tell us where the new Prime Minister is? 204 00:11:42,365 --> 00:11:45,596 The new Prime Minister doesn't live in this part of Canada. He's in Ottawa. 205 00:11:47,946 --> 00:11:49,062 So how do we get to Ottawa? 206 00:11:49,097 --> 00:11:51,661 Oh that's easy. You just have to follow the road. 207 00:11:51,696 --> 00:11:52,875 Which road?! 208 00:11:52,910 --> 00:11:55,361 This is Canada. We only have one road. 209 00:11:55,987 --> 00:11:57,442 Follow the only road. 210 00:11:57,477 --> 00:11:59,277 Follow the only road. 211 00:11:59,312 --> 00:12:02,842 To go anywhere in Canada, you just follow the only road. 212 00:12:02,877 --> 00:12:04,771 There's only one road in Canada. 213 00:12:04,772 --> 00:12:06,567 We call it the Road, the only road. 214 00:12:06,602 --> 00:12:09,742 Hip-hip, hooray, let's hear it for our Road. 215 00:12:09,777 --> 00:12:12,042 And it's paved and wide and up to code. 216 00:12:12,913 --> 00:12:14,288 All right dude, let's get the hell out of here! 217 00:12:14,323 --> 00:12:14,984 Word! 218 00:12:15,019 --> 00:12:16,268 You're off to see the Prime Minister, 219 00:12:16,269 --> 00:12:18,178 the Prime Minister of Canada! 220 00:12:18,213 --> 00:12:21,015 Good-bye, friends! Good luck with the new Prime Minister! 221 00:12:21,016 --> 00:12:23,556 And remember to watch out for Scott! He's a dick! 222 00:12:23,633 --> 00:12:25,558 Good-bye, good-bye, see ya, good luck. 223 00:12:28,995 --> 00:12:30,257 Twenty hours until Christmas. 224 00:12:30,258 --> 00:12:32,810 Our parents still have time to buy us presents IF we hurry. 225 00:12:33,558 --> 00:12:35,069 Ahoy there, travelers. 226 00:12:35,417 --> 00:12:36,333 Who are you? 227 00:12:36,368 --> 00:12:39,491 I am Rick, the proud Canadian Mountie. 228 00:12:42,425 --> 00:12:44,158 I thought mounties were supposed to ride horses. 229 00:12:45,154 --> 00:12:46,936 Yes. Yes, we are. 230 00:12:46,937 --> 00:12:49,793 But our funding has been cut and now we're forced to ride... 231 00:12:51,773 --> 00:12:53,927 But if you don't mind, we're in a rush to see the new Prime Minister. 232 00:12:53,962 --> 00:12:55,741 You're going to see the new Prime Minister. 233 00:12:55,742 --> 00:12:57,983 Oh, I would so like to meet him myself. 234 00:12:57,984 --> 00:13:01,640 It's his strange new laws that took our horses away. Perhaps I will go with you. 235 00:13:01,758 --> 00:13:03,467 That's okay, we'd rather just go by ourselves. 236 00:13:03,502 --> 00:13:08,111 Follow me this way! We're going to see the Prime Minister, the Prime Minister of Canada! 237 00:13:08,702 --> 00:13:11,329 Power-hungry Americans! I'll fix you! 238 00:13:15,019 --> 00:13:17,919 Oh Jesus, eighteen hours. We're running out of time! 239 00:13:17,954 --> 00:13:21,432 All right boys, prepare yourselves. We're about to enter... French Canada. 240 00:13:21,467 --> 00:13:22,228 French Canada? 241 00:13:22,263 --> 00:13:25,498 There'z no Canada like French Canada, 242 00:13:25,499 --> 00:13:27,624 ...it'z za bezt Canada in ze land. 243 00:13:27,659 --> 00:13:30,339 Ze ozer Canada is hardly Canada. 244 00:13:30,340 --> 00:13:31,340 If you lived here for a day, you'd understand. 245 00:13:33,882 --> 00:13:36,253 Welcome to French Canada. 246 00:13:36,288 --> 00:13:38,278 We have everyzing your heart could desire. 247 00:13:38,279 --> 00:13:41,553 Trapezes. Trampolines. And lots and lots of cheese. 248 00:13:41,787 --> 00:13:43,189 Would you like a moustache? 249 00:13:43,757 --> 00:13:46,622 Just stay calm, boys. French Canadians are a little... odd. 250 00:13:46,657 --> 00:13:49,253 Ah, we're just passing through to see the new Prime Minister. 251 00:13:49,288 --> 00:13:52,136 Well first you must answer that phone. 252 00:13:52,137 --> 00:13:53,720 Ring-ring. Ring-ring. 253 00:13:54,736 --> 00:13:56,106 We don't have time for this. 254 00:13:56,141 --> 00:13:59,656 You cannot pass through French Canada unless you take zat phone call! 255 00:13:59,657 --> 00:14:01,356 Ring-ring. Ring-ring. 256 00:14:03,277 --> 00:14:04,320 Hello? 257 00:14:04,355 --> 00:14:08,654 Allo. If you are going to see za new Prime Minister, then I want to go with you. 258 00:14:08,655 --> 00:14:12,421 He has passed a new law forbidding us French Canadians to drink wine. 259 00:14:12,457 --> 00:14:15,317 How can ze French not drink wine?? Travestie! 260 00:14:15,352 --> 00:14:16,895 Okay, you can come with us. 261 00:14:17,419 --> 00:14:19,386 Very good! Let us make haste! 262 00:14:20,522 --> 00:14:22,964 There'z no Canada like French Canada, 263 00:14:22,965 --> 00:14:24,931 ...it'z za bezt Canada in ze land. 264 00:14:25,409 --> 00:14:26,678 And ze ozer Canada. 265 00:14:26,713 --> 00:14:27,739 Is a bullshit Canada 266 00:14:27,774 --> 00:14:29,649 If you lived here for a day, you'd understand. 267 00:14:30,875 --> 00:14:32,639 I think you'd understand. 268 00:14:33,548 --> 00:14:35,134 ...You understand. 269 00:14:41,126 --> 00:14:44,050 Oh my! This certainly is a desolate place! 270 00:14:44,085 --> 00:14:46,161 It reminds me of death and fear. 271 00:14:46,504 --> 00:14:49,311 How much further to Ottawa! Christmas is only twelve hours away. 272 00:14:49,346 --> 00:14:51,059 We must be very close now. 273 00:14:51,094 --> 00:14:52,829 Ey! What are you doing?! 274 00:14:53,949 --> 00:14:55,359 Oh no. It's Scott. 275 00:14:55,394 --> 00:14:57,277 What are you two doing helping these Americans?! 276 00:14:57,278 --> 00:15:00,603 Don't you know America thinks it owns Canada along with the rest of the world?! 277 00:15:00,652 --> 00:15:02,003 You're a dick, Scott! 278 00:15:02,038 --> 00:15:05,309 You're a dick! And by helping Americans, you're just as smelly as they are! 279 00:15:05,310 --> 00:15:06,921 Now I'm going to get you! 280 00:15:06,978 --> 00:15:08,027 Not a-hire, Scott! 281 00:15:08,062 --> 00:15:09,108 Who the hell are you?! 282 00:15:09,143 --> 00:15:10,632 I'm Steve the Newfoudlander. 283 00:15:10,633 --> 00:15:12,340 And you'er on Newfoundland property now! 284 00:15:12,341 --> 00:15:14,143 Get off before I have you arrested! 285 00:15:14,178 --> 00:15:18,507 Ugh! This isn't over! Not by a long shot! I'll fix you. I'll fix all of you!! 286 00:15:19,695 --> 00:15:22,405 Woo, that was a close call. Thank you, kind Newfie! 287 00:15:22,440 --> 00:15:25,501 God-damnit, we need to get to the new Prime Minister! NOW! 288 00:15:25,536 --> 00:15:26,841 Oh yeah, the Prime Minister, eh? 289 00:15:26,842 --> 00:15:28,570 He sure has screwed up things for Newfoundland. 290 00:15:28,571 --> 00:15:31,168 Life just hasn't been the same since he made sodomy illegal. 291 00:15:31,259 --> 00:15:35,079 Well, come with us! Maybe you can ask him to take his sodomy ban away. 292 00:15:35,114 --> 00:15:36,716 Can we just get going, please? 293 00:15:36,751 --> 00:15:38,442 Yeah, sure, except there's just one problem. 294 00:15:38,477 --> 00:15:39,431 What? 295 00:15:39,466 --> 00:15:40,744 You folks are goin' the wrong way. 296 00:15:41,345 --> 00:15:43,729 What?? But I thought there was one road in Canada. 297 00:15:43,764 --> 00:15:45,776 Yeah. And you all went the wrong direction on it. 298 00:15:45,811 --> 00:15:48,516 Ohh, that's right. Ottawa is that way. 299 00:15:48,551 --> 00:15:51,442 Of course. Ottawa left, Newfoundland right! 300 00:15:51,905 --> 00:15:53,025 Oh no! 301 00:15:53,060 --> 00:15:54,582 How could you be so stupid! 302 00:15:55,038 --> 00:15:57,870 There's no way we can go all the way back. We'll never make it now! 303 00:15:57,905 --> 00:16:03,198 It's okay, boys. The power is inside us to get to Ottawa! We can wish ourselves there! 304 00:16:03,233 --> 00:16:05,154 Ah yes, let's wish ourselves there. 305 00:16:12,620 --> 00:16:13,709 Is it working? 306 00:16:13,744 --> 00:16:17,855 Oh, God-damnit! Well I warned you Kyle! I told you if I missed Christmas we were gonna throw down! 307 00:16:17,856 --> 00:16:20,682 Well it's on! We're gonna have it our RIGHT NOW! 308 00:16:21,427 --> 00:16:23,561 Of course, we could always take my boat, eh? 309 00:16:24,347 --> 00:16:27,288 Oh yes! On the river we could travel to Ottawa in no time! 310 00:16:27,775 --> 00:16:28,720 Well come on! 311 00:16:30,526 --> 00:16:32,536 Okay, next stop, the new Prime Minister. 312 00:16:33,828 --> 00:16:35,620 Do you think we can still make it in time? 313 00:16:35,655 --> 00:16:37,766 We'd better, Kyle. Or you're dead. 314 00:16:43,983 --> 00:16:45,479 Here we are at the Parliament buildin'. 315 00:16:45,514 --> 00:16:47,149 Ze Prime Minister is inside. 316 00:16:47,362 --> 00:16:49,188 Well come on, let's hurry! It's almost Christmas! 317 00:16:53,684 --> 00:16:54,795 Yes? 318 00:16:55,243 --> 00:16:56,835 We need to see the new Prime Minister. 319 00:16:56,870 --> 00:17:00,434 Ha! Impossible! The new Prime Minister isn't seeing anybody! 320 00:17:01,466 --> 00:17:03,178 Oh well, zo much for zat. 321 00:17:03,213 --> 00:17:05,872 Yeah, we gave it our best, but our best wasn't good enough, eh? 322 00:17:05,907 --> 00:17:07,828 No. No!! 323 00:17:09,480 --> 00:17:10,327 Yes? 324 00:17:10,362 --> 00:17:14,165 Please, sir. I traveled a long way to get here. He's the only person who can help me. 325 00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:17,753 The Prime Minister isn't here. He's in China on official business. 326 00:17:17,754 --> 00:17:20,124 So you might as well go home. Good-bye! 327 00:17:20,159 --> 00:17:25,075 Then that's it. I'm... I'm never going to get my brother back. 328 00:17:25,786 --> 00:17:29,428 And... I'm not going to get any Christmas presents. 329 00:17:29,913 --> 00:17:31,939 And... I'm not gonna have a Christmas adventure. 330 00:17:31,974 --> 00:17:33,352 (And I'm not gonna have a ...) 331 00:17:39,184 --> 00:17:41,472 Oh please! Please stop crying. 332 00:17:42,269 --> 00:17:43,108 I'm gonna kill you, Kyle. 333 00:17:43,947 --> 00:17:47,465 All right all right, I was lying. The Prime Minister IS here. 334 00:17:47,500 --> 00:17:48,251 Really? 335 00:17:48,286 --> 00:17:49,261 Yes yes. Come in. 336 00:17:56,661 --> 00:18:01,048 I am the Prime Minister of Canada. What do you guys want? 337 00:18:03,006 --> 00:18:08,009 Sir, you recently passed a new law allowing parents who have given their children up for adoption to change their minds. 338 00:18:08,010 --> 00:18:09,379 My little brother was- 339 00:18:09,415 --> 00:18:10,284 Not so fast! 340 00:18:11,423 --> 00:18:11,974 Ike! 341 00:18:12,009 --> 00:18:12,690 Kyle! 342 00:18:13,488 --> 00:18:15,699 Prime Minister, these are the child's Canadian parents! 343 00:18:15,700 --> 00:18:17,870 Their Canadian blood pumps through his veins! 344 00:18:17,871 --> 00:18:21,099 Would you send him back to America with those world-hungry scum?! 345 00:18:21,155 --> 00:18:22,446 Please, sir. 346 00:18:22,447 --> 00:18:24,772 I came because I don't think Ike belongs here. 347 00:18:24,773 --> 00:18:30,098 Family isn't about whose blood you have in you, family is about the people who cared about you and took care of you. 348 00:18:30,099 --> 00:18:32,794 We're not the same blood, but I love my little brother. 349 00:18:32,795 --> 00:18:38,267 We've taken care of him because he needed us to, and that makes us more family than anything. 350 00:18:40,541 --> 00:18:42,629 That is a great speech, guy. 351 00:18:42,630 --> 00:18:47,971 But the answer is no! All of my new laws will stay in effect forever! 352 00:18:48,580 --> 00:18:50,333 Haha, you lose, Americans! 353 00:18:50,368 --> 00:18:53,379 Then, I suppose us mounties will never get our horses. 354 00:18:53,414 --> 00:18:55,133 And we won't get our wine. 355 00:18:55,168 --> 00:18:57,204 And we can't perform sodomy, eh? 356 00:18:57,239 --> 00:18:59,294 But why are you making such strange laws?? 357 00:18:59,329 --> 00:19:00,827 I SAID GO! 358 00:19:03,807 --> 00:19:05,982 Oh my God, they've killed Kenny! 359 00:19:06,017 --> 00:19:08,115 You... bastards! 360 00:19:08,116 --> 00:19:10,130 Wha, what the hell is wrong with you?? 361 00:19:10,131 --> 00:19:12,877 What kind of Prime Minister bases his decisions on hatred? 362 00:19:12,878 --> 00:19:15,909 And, and takes away mounties' horses? And French people's wine? 363 00:19:15,910 --> 00:19:18,309 What the hell kind of Prime Minister are you, anyway?! 364 00:19:18,344 --> 00:19:20,931 I am the Prime Minister of Canada. 365 00:19:20,932 --> 00:19:23,036 I can do whatever I- 366 00:19:24,974 --> 00:19:28,817 Uh oh. Uh, don't mind that guy hiding in the spider hole, he's just my friend. 367 00:19:28,849 --> 00:19:29,632 What the hell?? 368 00:19:29,954 --> 00:19:31,743 Hey, that looks like Saddam Hussein! 369 00:19:31,778 --> 00:19:35,522 Saddam Hussein?? Naw, relax, baby. I'm not him. 370 00:19:35,943 --> 00:19:39,309 Zat explains everything! Za new Prime Minister was Saddam Hussein, 371 00:19:39,310 --> 00:19:42,470 ...once again trying to take over our beloved Canada like he did before. 372 00:19:42,583 --> 00:19:43,616 Saddam Hussein? 373 00:19:43,651 --> 00:19:44,913 He was fooling us? 374 00:19:44,948 --> 00:19:45,835 Get him! 375 00:19:45,870 --> 00:19:50,341 Ahh, don't shoot. I want to negotiate. Hey, relax! Gah! 376 00:19:51,076 --> 00:19:55,105 Wait a minute. This means all the Prime Minister's new laws are null and void. 377 00:19:55,106 --> 00:19:56,625 We can have our horses back! 378 00:19:56,904 --> 00:19:58,253 And we can drink our wine. 379 00:19:58,288 --> 00:20:00,113 And I can sodomize me boys again 380 00:20:00,570 --> 00:20:04,583 Young man, you... must really care for Peter to have come all this way. 381 00:20:04,618 --> 00:20:06,944 Perhaps we were wrong to try and take Peter back. 382 00:20:06,945 --> 00:20:09,811 He doesn't belong here. He belongs with his family. 383 00:20:09,897 --> 00:20:12,858 Peter, would you like to go back to your home in Colorado? 384 00:20:21,000 --> 00:20:21,960 What is that? 385 00:20:21,995 --> 00:20:24,969 It's Christmas. We officially missed it. 386 00:20:24,970 --> 00:20:28,263 It's Christmas Day and ... I'm in Canada. 387 00:20:28,402 --> 00:20:30,365 Wull yeah, but ah-I got my brother back. 388 00:20:30,400 --> 00:20:33,592 Yeah! You got your brother back, but I didn't get any presents! 389 00:20:33,593 --> 00:20:35,089 And what did I tell you, Kyle?! 390 00:20:35,090 --> 00:20:38,859 I told you that if we didn't make it back in time for Christmas I was gonna whup your ass, didn't I?! 391 00:20:38,860 --> 00:20:39,843 Dude, come on. 392 00:20:39,878 --> 00:20:41,020 Well now you're gonna get it, motherfucker! 393 00:20:41,021 --> 00:20:43,843 That's right! You and me! Right now! We're havin' it out! 394 00:20:43,844 --> 00:20:46,679 Let's go! Come on! Come on!! 395 00:20:56,893 --> 00:21:01,385 Mooooooom! Moooooooom! 396 00:21:01,578 --> 00:21:04,959 Ey, come on, boys! You can spend Christmas with us, Canada style! 397 00:21:09,074 --> 00:21:10,730 Ding dong, they caught Saddam! 398 00:21:10,731 --> 00:21:11,731 Merry Christmas to the world! 399 00:21:12,380 --> 00:21:15,330 Ding dong, the Americans caught Saddam! 400 00:21:15,964 --> 00:21:19,018 Now Canada is free for you and you and me 401 00:21:19,620 --> 00:21:21,982 It's the best Christmas presents we ever got 402 00:21:22,016 --> 00:21:23,720 Canadian Christmas, it's the best! 403 00:21:23,721 --> 00:21:25,347 We drink and dance and show our breasts! 404 00:21:25,382 --> 00:21:28,729 Let's celebrate! Saddam Hussein's been caught! 405 00:21:29,690 --> 00:21:32,702 Oh well. Maybe we'll get to have a Christmas adventure next year.