1 00:00:14,356 --> 00:00:17,192 ♪ I'm goin' down to South Park, gonna have myself a time ♪ 2 00:00:17,317 --> 00:00:18,985 ♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪ 3 00:00:19,110 --> 00:00:21,071 ♪ Humble folks without temptation ♪ 4 00:00:21,196 --> 00:00:24,366 ♪ Goin' down to South Park, gonna leave my woes behind ♪ 5 00:00:24,491 --> 00:00:26,034 ♪ Ample parking day or night ♪ 6 00:00:26,159 --> 00:00:27,827 ♪ People spouting, "Howdy, neighbor!" ♪ 7 00:00:27,953 --> 00:00:31,081 ♪ Heading on up to South Park, gonna see if I can't unwind ♪ 8 00:00:31,206 --> 00:00:34,167 ♪ Mrph rmhmhm rm! Mrph rmhmhm rm! ♪ 9 00:00:34,292 --> 00:00:37,796 ♪ Come on down to South Park and meet some friends of mine ♪ 10 00:00:46,680 --> 00:00:47,889 Mr. President, 11 00:00:48,014 --> 00:00:51,059 the Russians are scrambling bombers to attack Denmark. 12 00:00:51,184 --> 00:00:54,646 NATO wants to know how we intend to stop them. 13 00:00:54,771 --> 00:00:55,855 Mr. President? 14 00:00:55,981 --> 00:00:58,984 Mr. President, you can't just sit there with your stank face. 15 00:00:59,109 --> 00:01:01,361 I-I-I can't? 16 00:01:01,486 --> 00:01:03,279 The Troll Trace website is set to go online 17 00:01:03,405 --> 00:01:04,739 in less than 15 minutes! 18 00:01:04,864 --> 00:01:06,783 The world is in complete chaos! 19 00:01:06,908 --> 00:01:10,286 Sir! Someone is leading a coordinated cyber strike 20 00:01:10,412 --> 00:01:11,955 on the Troll Trace website. 21 00:01:12,080 --> 00:01:14,124 A cyber attack? Well, that's good. 22 00:01:14,249 --> 00:01:15,625 Where's it coming from? 23 00:01:15,750 --> 00:01:17,252 Could be Russian. We don't know. 24 00:01:17,377 --> 00:01:21,047 Whoever this troll is, he's pretty fucking hardcore, sir. 25 00:01:27,470 --> 00:01:29,764 Okay, okay. Token. Token, are you there? 26 00:01:29,889 --> 00:01:31,349 I'm here. What's this about, Kyle? 27 00:01:31,474 --> 00:01:33,018 I can't tell you, dude. I just need your help. 28 00:01:33,143 --> 00:01:34,394 Please, my life depends on it. 29 00:01:34,519 --> 00:01:35,645 Okay, okay, sure. 30 00:01:35,770 --> 00:01:38,148 All right, I need you to tell me the worst thing I can say 31 00:01:38,273 --> 00:01:39,691 on a United Negro College Fund website 32 00:01:39,816 --> 00:01:40,942 to piss off black people. 33 00:01:41,067 --> 00:01:41,651 What? 34 00:01:41,776 --> 00:01:43,653 Token, please! There's no time to explain! 35 00:01:43,778 --> 00:01:47,657 Beyoncé ain't nothing but a Taylor Swift rip-off. 36 00:01:47,782 --> 00:01:49,284 That helps. Thank you! 37 00:01:49,409 --> 00:01:51,828 Tweek, Craig, I need you to get on the GLAAD website and respond 38 00:01:51,953 --> 00:01:53,997 to all the horrible shit I just said about gay people. 39 00:01:54,122 --> 00:01:55,915 Why'd you say horrible shit about gay people? 40 00:01:56,041 --> 00:01:57,667 It's not important. Just get on it and respond. 41 00:01:57,792 --> 00:01:58,668 Hang on. 42 00:01:58,793 --> 00:01:59,794 Stan, finally! 43 00:01:59,919 --> 00:02:01,796 Dude, I need everybody online, now! 44 00:02:01,921 --> 00:02:03,339 - For what? - There's no time to explain. 45 00:02:03,465 --> 00:02:04,549 You've got to go out and get everybody. 46 00:02:04,674 --> 00:02:06,176 Tell them to get on their computers. Go! 47 00:02:06,301 --> 00:02:07,010 Okay! 48 00:02:07,135 --> 00:02:08,595 Jimmy, what's the worst possible thing 49 00:02:08,720 --> 00:02:10,764 you can say on a website for handicapped Syrian refugees? 50 00:02:10,889 --> 00:02:15,185 W-W-Waddle back to Syria, desert-tard? 51 00:02:16,561 --> 00:02:20,231 You boys better not be on that computer! 52 00:02:20,356 --> 00:02:22,400 I'll make you pay for this! 53 00:02:22,525 --> 00:02:25,070 You locked your mother in the pantry?! 54 00:02:25,195 --> 00:02:27,864 I'll lock you in your rooms forever! 55 00:02:27,989 --> 00:02:29,282 ♪ Never gonna give, never gonna give ♪ 56 00:02:29,407 --> 00:02:31,868 ♪ Give you up ♪ 57 00:02:31,993 --> 00:02:33,745 ♪ Never gonna give, never gonna give ♪ 58 00:02:33,870 --> 00:02:35,663 ♪ Give you up ♪ 59 00:02:35,789 --> 00:02:38,041 ♪ We've known each other ♪ 60 00:02:38,166 --> 00:02:40,210 ♪ For so long ♪ 61 00:02:40,335 --> 00:02:41,878 Skank? 62 00:02:42,003 --> 00:02:42,879 Dildo? 63 00:02:43,004 --> 00:02:44,547 Skankhunt, can you hear me? 64 00:02:44,672 --> 00:02:46,716 Yes! Yes, where are you? 65 00:02:46,841 --> 00:02:48,551 The troll locked us in the control room 66 00:02:48,676 --> 00:02:50,220 with his Danish workers. 67 00:02:50,345 --> 00:02:52,305 How long before the website goes online? 68 00:02:52,430 --> 00:02:54,140 Less than 10 minutes. 69 00:02:54,265 --> 00:02:55,391 Oh, God! 70 00:02:55,517 --> 00:02:57,727 Skankhunt, the Troll Trace servers 71 00:02:57,852 --> 00:03:00,730 monitor and catalog outrage and hate on the Internet. 72 00:03:00,855 --> 00:03:03,191 There's a troll out there trying to overload them 73 00:03:03,316 --> 00:03:05,235 by generating tons of hate. 74 00:03:05,360 --> 00:03:09,155 Skank, whoever's doing it is doing it from your account. 75 00:03:09,280 --> 00:03:10,365 My account? 76 00:03:10,490 --> 00:03:12,992 Yeah, he's pissing off a lot of people. 77 00:03:13,118 --> 00:03:15,745 That's my boy! 78 00:03:17,539 --> 00:03:19,499 The core energy is completely stable 79 00:03:19,624 --> 00:03:21,751 and very easy to produce. 80 00:03:21,876 --> 00:03:24,379 It's the most massive energy source of its size 81 00:03:24,504 --> 00:03:25,713 we've ever seen. 82 00:03:25,839 --> 00:03:27,006 We've done it, Elon. 83 00:03:27,132 --> 00:03:30,426 With this type of energy, we can easily get mankind to Mars. 84 00:03:30,552 --> 00:03:31,970 This is amazing! 85 00:03:32,095 --> 00:03:33,847 And it's all thanks to you, little girl. 86 00:03:33,972 --> 00:03:35,598 How did you get to be so smart? 87 00:03:35,723 --> 00:03:39,018 I just have a boyfriend who really supports me. 88 00:03:39,144 --> 00:03:43,022 Well, come on. I want to know everything about you. 89 00:03:43,148 --> 00:03:45,942 Conniving snakes in the grass. 90 00:03:46,067 --> 00:03:47,944 - All of them. - Yep. 91 00:03:48,069 --> 00:03:49,779 We have to tell someone the truth, Butters. 92 00:03:49,904 --> 00:03:51,906 Are you sure about what's going to happen on Mars? 93 00:03:52,031 --> 00:03:53,950 It's all been leading up to this. 94 00:03:54,075 --> 00:03:55,618 We've just been too blind to see it before. 95 00:03:55,743 --> 00:03:58,037 Hey, you guys need anything? Water? Soda? 96 00:03:58,163 --> 00:04:00,415 Maybe just a moment alone to talk. 97 00:04:00,540 --> 00:04:01,875 S-Sure. About what? 98 00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:04,460 The end of our species. 99 00:04:04,586 --> 00:04:06,129 All right, who else we got now? 100 00:04:06,254 --> 00:04:07,672 Kevin, are you there? Kenny? 101 00:04:07,797 --> 00:04:10,300 Yeah, I-I typed in everything you told me to. 102 00:04:10,425 --> 00:04:12,135 Mrph rmhmhm rm! Mrph rmphm? 103 00:04:12,260 --> 00:04:14,637 Kyle! I'm gonna help, too! 104 00:04:14,762 --> 00:04:16,556 No, Ike! So far the only thing you've done 105 00:04:16,681 --> 00:04:17,682 has been from Dad's account. 106 00:04:17,807 --> 00:04:19,184 I need you to stay clean. 107 00:04:19,309 --> 00:04:20,852 No trolling, okay? 108 00:04:20,977 --> 00:04:22,687 You can just help me with what I should say. 109 00:04:22,812 --> 00:04:24,981 Hello? Can you hear me? 110 00:04:25,106 --> 00:04:26,482 This is Dildo Shwaggins. 111 00:04:26,608 --> 00:04:27,567 Who are you? 112 00:04:27,692 --> 00:04:29,652 I'm a colleague of your father's. 113 00:04:29,777 --> 00:04:32,739 We see what you're trying to do, and we're gonna help. 114 00:04:32,864 --> 00:04:35,617 We trolled with your father. Now we will troll with you. 115 00:04:35,742 --> 00:04:36,993 Uh, okay. 116 00:04:37,118 --> 00:04:40,872 Son, you need to know that your father is very proud of you. 117 00:04:40,997 --> 00:04:43,291 He was the best at Trevor's Axiom. 118 00:04:43,416 --> 00:04:44,959 He believes you can be too. 119 00:04:45,084 --> 00:04:47,587 What the hell is Trevor's Axiom? 120 00:04:47,712 --> 00:04:51,132 Trevor's Axiom is a well-known equation in online trolling. 121 00:04:51,257 --> 00:04:52,759 It's a way in which one person 122 00:04:52,884 --> 00:04:55,094 can create a massive reaction on the Internet. 123 00:04:55,220 --> 00:04:57,096 Look, person "A" trolls person "B." 124 00:04:57,222 --> 00:04:58,598 But it's not about person "B." 125 00:04:58,723 --> 00:05:00,058 The troll is trying to push buttons 126 00:05:00,183 --> 00:05:01,684 to try and get a reaction from hundreds, 127 00:05:01,809 --> 00:05:03,519 eventually creating person "C," 128 00:05:03,645 --> 00:05:05,480 who's overreaction and self-righteousness 129 00:05:05,605 --> 00:05:08,191 will elicit a reaction from persons "D" through "F," 130 00:05:08,316 --> 00:05:11,486 who weren't trolls but can't help rip on person "C." 131 00:05:11,611 --> 00:05:14,697 Their reactions lead to outraged persons "G" through "N," 132 00:05:14,822 --> 00:05:17,242 and it keeps going, generating massive energy. 133 00:05:17,367 --> 00:05:18,701 It's like the fission reaction 134 00:05:18,826 --> 00:05:20,620 that leads to a fusion explosion, 135 00:05:20,745 --> 00:05:23,039 all bringing out the worst in humanity. 136 00:05:23,164 --> 00:05:25,708 Huh. That sort of sounds like how I got elected. 137 00:05:25,833 --> 00:05:27,377 Precisely, Mr. President. 138 00:05:27,502 --> 00:05:30,171 And if this kind of overreaction can be amplified 139 00:05:30,296 --> 00:05:32,006 through the Pentagon's servers... 140 00:05:32,131 --> 00:05:33,258 It could blow out the Internet 141 00:05:33,383 --> 00:05:35,969 before Troll Trace ever does substantial damage. 142 00:05:36,094 --> 00:05:40,306 Gentlemen, get me in contact with that troll. 143 00:05:40,431 --> 00:05:42,350 Listen, there isn't much time. 144 00:05:42,475 --> 00:05:44,060 This whole thing has to be stopped. 145 00:05:44,185 --> 00:05:45,728 We can't go to Mars. 146 00:05:45,853 --> 00:05:48,064 You keep saying that, but not why. 147 00:05:48,189 --> 00:05:51,192 Because Eric knows the future. 148 00:05:51,317 --> 00:05:52,986 What are you talking about? 149 00:05:53,111 --> 00:05:55,405 I've had visions of Mars for the past few months. 150 00:05:55,530 --> 00:05:56,572 I'm a visionary. 151 00:05:56,698 --> 00:05:59,617 That's why I came here, why I brought her. 152 00:05:59,742 --> 00:06:02,537 But the visions weren't complete until recently. 153 00:06:02,662 --> 00:06:05,415 I know what happens on Mars. 154 00:06:08,501 --> 00:06:12,297 At first you'll be super-happy, bouncing around the red sand. 155 00:06:12,422 --> 00:06:15,091 Cool! 156 00:06:15,216 --> 00:06:17,176 Everyone will be really nice. 157 00:06:18,886 --> 00:06:19,887 Hi! 158 00:06:20,013 --> 00:06:22,515 - Hi! - Hi! 159 00:06:23,516 --> 00:06:25,059 You'll think the rover cars 160 00:06:25,184 --> 00:06:26,936 and roller coasters are really cool. 161 00:06:27,061 --> 00:06:28,438 But then you'll realize something... 162 00:06:28,563 --> 00:06:31,190 The other colonists all seem to be women. 163 00:06:32,734 --> 00:06:34,944 Hmm. Let's see. 164 00:06:35,069 --> 00:06:36,446 And then you'll start to wonder, 165 00:06:36,571 --> 00:06:37,822 "Where are all the guys?" 166 00:06:37,947 --> 00:06:39,824 Look underground... Look underground... 167 00:06:39,949 --> 00:06:41,451 Look underground... Look underground... 168 00:06:41,576 --> 00:06:43,328 And soon you'll realize there's areas 169 00:06:43,453 --> 00:06:45,371 you didn't understand the purpose for. 170 00:06:51,252 --> 00:06:53,129 What is this place? 171 00:06:53,254 --> 00:06:56,716 And that's when you'll learn the truth. 172 00:06:56,841 --> 00:06:58,634 Men have been forced underground, 173 00:06:58,760 --> 00:07:00,470 deemed useless by women. 174 00:07:01,471 --> 00:07:03,097 They are mined for the only things 175 00:07:03,222 --> 00:07:07,685 women still need us for... our semen and our jokes. 176 00:07:08,853 --> 00:07:10,772 What? No, no! 177 00:07:10,897 --> 00:07:12,774 You're just as funny as us. You don't need to do this! 178 00:07:12,899 --> 00:07:14,817 Noooo! 179 00:07:14,942 --> 00:07:17,111 No, no! 180 00:07:17,236 --> 00:07:18,738 Write jokes! 181 00:07:18,863 --> 00:07:21,532 No. No. 182 00:07:24,702 --> 00:07:26,371 And you'll be trapped down there forever, 183 00:07:26,496 --> 00:07:30,083 in the cum and joke mines of Mars. 184 00:07:30,208 --> 00:07:32,168 That's... That's ridiculous. 185 00:07:32,293 --> 00:07:33,419 Why would women need us to do that? 186 00:07:33,544 --> 00:07:34,921 They're just as funny as men. 187 00:07:35,046 --> 00:07:36,506 If there's even a little part of you 188 00:07:36,631 --> 00:07:38,383 that doesn't really believe that, 189 00:07:38,508 --> 00:07:41,177 then think about what else has to be going on. 190 00:07:47,475 --> 00:07:48,351 What? 191 00:07:48,476 --> 00:07:50,353 What? 192 00:07:50,478 --> 00:07:53,106 You have to help us stop this. 193 00:07:58,528 --> 00:07:59,946 Ah! God damn it! 194 00:08:00,071 --> 00:08:02,323 Skank! You still there? 195 00:08:02,448 --> 00:08:03,658 Yeah, I'm here. 196 00:08:03,783 --> 00:08:04,951 The servers are starting to heat up, 197 00:08:05,076 --> 00:08:06,786 but the Danish say there are breakers 198 00:08:06,911 --> 00:08:08,538 that will never let them overload. 199 00:08:08,663 --> 00:08:11,707 You got to climb up the building and shut off those breakers. 200 00:08:11,833 --> 00:08:14,544 I can't go anywhere. I'm locked in the conference room. 201 00:08:14,669 --> 00:08:18,339 Oh, the key code to the conference room is 9... 202 00:08:18,464 --> 00:08:20,216 Yeah? 203 00:08:20,341 --> 00:08:21,717 That's it. 9. 204 00:08:21,843 --> 00:08:23,636 Oh, for fuck's sake! 205 00:08:25,847 --> 00:08:27,598 Kyle! 206 00:08:27,723 --> 00:08:30,059 You better run if I get out of here! 207 00:08:30,184 --> 00:08:33,271 You better pray that I... Ah! 208 00:08:38,192 --> 00:08:39,569 Aha! 209 00:08:43,030 --> 00:08:45,032 Yaaah! 210 00:08:50,204 --> 00:08:53,583 Skank. Skankhunt, are you there yet? 211 00:08:53,708 --> 00:08:56,502 Yeah, I'm up with all the servers. 212 00:08:56,627 --> 00:08:58,463 The first breaker should be there. 213 00:08:58,588 --> 00:09:00,756 Tell him to look for a large red lever. 214 00:09:00,882 --> 00:09:01,757 Skank. 215 00:09:01,883 --> 00:09:05,178 Do you see a large red lever? 216 00:09:05,303 --> 00:09:06,721 Yeah, I got it! 217 00:09:06,846 --> 00:09:08,306 Flip it off. 218 00:09:09,724 --> 00:09:12,435 That's good. Keep going, Skankhunt. 219 00:09:12,560 --> 00:09:16,689 You are all dumb-ass fuckwads. 220 00:09:16,814 --> 00:09:20,610 Lick my asshole, you Mexican bitch. 221 00:09:20,735 --> 00:09:22,403 - Ike! - Aah! 222 00:09:22,528 --> 00:09:26,032 You dare lock me in the pantry 223 00:09:26,157 --> 00:09:28,743 so you can play on your computer?! 224 00:09:31,913 --> 00:09:32,788 Mommy! 225 00:09:32,914 --> 00:09:35,208 You're gonna pay for what you've done! 226 00:09:35,333 --> 00:09:36,334 Aah! 227 00:09:36,459 --> 00:09:37,960 Aaggh! 228 00:09:39,420 --> 00:09:40,796 - Kyle! - Ike! 229 00:09:40,922 --> 00:09:41,923 Shit! 230 00:09:42,048 --> 00:09:43,549 Mommy got out! 231 00:09:43,674 --> 00:09:45,468 You! 232 00:09:45,593 --> 00:09:48,721 You helped make your brother this way! 233 00:09:48,846 --> 00:09:51,265 Mom, there's been a mistake. Ike isn't the school troll. 234 00:09:51,390 --> 00:09:52,391 We're trying to help the... 235 00:09:52,517 --> 00:09:55,353 Shut up! Not another word from either of you! 236 00:09:55,478 --> 00:09:59,649 You're both grounded from the computer forever! 237 00:09:59,774 --> 00:10:01,776 Mom, please, you got to listen to me. 238 00:10:01,901 --> 00:10:04,028 - Ike is innocent. - Do you think I'm stupid?! 239 00:10:04,153 --> 00:10:06,781 No, Mom, you just don't know everything. 240 00:10:06,906 --> 00:10:09,617 You both march out of here right now! 241 00:10:09,742 --> 00:10:13,538 I'm sorry, Mom. I'm just trying to protect my family. 242 00:10:21,921 --> 00:10:24,549 Look, Elon, I'm just saying before we go any further, 243 00:10:24,674 --> 00:10:26,342 you might want to hear this kid out. 244 00:10:26,467 --> 00:10:29,011 Go on. Tell Elon. 245 00:10:29,136 --> 00:10:32,181 Elon, I know you've dreamt of mankind getting to Mars, 246 00:10:32,306 --> 00:10:35,476 but it's not going to be very kind to man. 247 00:10:35,601 --> 00:10:37,186 They're going to put us underground. 248 00:10:37,311 --> 00:10:38,271 For what? 249 00:10:38,396 --> 00:10:41,065 What's the one thing women don't have? 250 00:10:41,190 --> 00:10:42,984 Semen and a sense of humor. 251 00:10:43,109 --> 00:10:44,318 That's two things. 252 00:10:44,443 --> 00:10:45,778 They're pretty related. 253 00:10:45,903 --> 00:10:48,030 Women don't need us for comedy. 254 00:10:48,155 --> 00:10:50,074 They can be just as funny as men. 255 00:10:50,199 --> 00:10:51,409 You should meet my girlfriend. 256 00:10:51,534 --> 00:10:53,703 She's really smart and really funny. 257 00:10:53,828 --> 00:10:55,329 Ohh, Elon. 258 00:10:55,454 --> 00:10:56,956 Oh, Christ, Elon. 259 00:10:57,081 --> 00:10:58,457 I used to think women were funny, too, 260 00:10:58,583 --> 00:10:59,667 but Eric talked me out of it. 261 00:10:59,792 --> 00:11:01,669 It's something they do to our brains. 262 00:11:01,794 --> 00:11:04,213 They attract us like flies to the spider web. 263 00:11:04,338 --> 00:11:05,381 And then they make you think 264 00:11:05,506 --> 00:11:07,383 they're really smart, really funny. 265 00:11:07,508 --> 00:11:09,552 But they're only really smart, Elon. 266 00:11:09,677 --> 00:11:13,139 They can live without us. We can't live without them. 267 00:11:14,348 --> 00:11:15,975 If even 1/16th of you 268 00:11:16,100 --> 00:11:18,894 believes women might not be as funny as men, Elon... 269 00:11:19,020 --> 00:11:20,730 Elon? 270 00:11:22,690 --> 00:11:26,277 Why don't you kill yourself? Trust me. No one will care. 271 00:11:26,402 --> 00:11:27,903 You fat hooker! 272 00:11:27,987 --> 00:11:29,238 You fat hooker. 273 00:11:29,363 --> 00:11:30,323 Ike, when this is all over, 274 00:11:30,448 --> 00:11:31,991 we're gonna need to clean your mouth out. 275 00:11:32,116 --> 00:11:34,201 You clean your fucking mouth out. 276 00:11:34,327 --> 00:11:36,912 Stan! You still haven't found Butters? 277 00:11:37,038 --> 00:11:39,373 Dude, I need his hatred towards women right now. 278 00:11:39,498 --> 00:11:41,709 Dude, he's not around anywhere. He must be out of town. 279 00:11:41,834 --> 00:11:42,710 Shit! 280 00:11:42,835 --> 00:11:43,878 Hold on. 281 00:11:44,003 --> 00:11:45,921 Kyle? 282 00:11:46,047 --> 00:11:48,090 Oh, hey, Mr. President. 283 00:11:48,215 --> 00:11:50,926 Kyle, you're the troll who started all this? 284 00:11:51,052 --> 00:11:52,762 Uh, what do you mean? 285 00:11:52,887 --> 00:11:54,805 Don't worry. Your secret's safe with me. 286 00:11:54,930 --> 00:11:56,932 So long as you keep doing what you're doing. 287 00:11:57,058 --> 00:11:58,893 The American government is behind you. 288 00:11:59,018 --> 00:12:00,102 It is? 289 00:12:00,227 --> 00:12:01,604 Keep up the good work. 290 00:12:01,729 --> 00:12:03,356 We're gonna take that big shitstorm of hate 291 00:12:03,481 --> 00:12:04,899 you're creating and amplify it. 292 00:12:05,024 --> 00:12:06,233 We'll try to create enough energy 293 00:12:06,359 --> 00:12:07,860 to blow up the whole fucking Internet. 294 00:12:07,985 --> 00:12:10,279 You're doing God's work, son. Keep it up. 295 00:12:11,280 --> 00:12:12,406 Thanks? 296 00:12:12,531 --> 00:12:15,117 ♪ En junker red ved juletid ♪ 297 00:12:15,242 --> 00:12:17,745 ♪ Tjing tjang tjing nutillej ♪ 298 00:12:17,870 --> 00:12:20,581 ♪ Omkring ham dalet sneen hvid ♪ 299 00:12:20,706 --> 00:12:23,042 ♪ Tjing tjang tjing nutillej ♪ 300 00:12:23,167 --> 00:12:24,293 Oh, no, you don't. 301 00:12:24,418 --> 00:12:26,295 ♪ Han stred sig frem i regn og blaest ♪ 302 00:12:26,420 --> 00:12:29,215 ♪ Med et der segnede Hans hest ♪ 303 00:12:36,013 --> 00:12:37,807 Laura, have my boys come to see Craig? 304 00:12:37,932 --> 00:12:39,100 They're hiding from me. 305 00:12:42,561 --> 00:12:44,105 What? 306 00:12:44,230 --> 00:12:45,398 What? What? 307 00:12:45,523 --> 00:12:49,235 The son of a bitch. He's such a bastard! 308 00:12:50,236 --> 00:12:52,613 When you marry someone and you think you know them... 309 00:12:52,738 --> 00:12:54,615 I don't know what you're talking about. 310 00:12:54,740 --> 00:12:56,992 Troll Trace. It's up and running. 311 00:12:57,118 --> 00:12:59,453 It can tell you anybody's Internet history. 312 00:12:59,578 --> 00:13:02,540 I couldn't resist. I looked up my husband. 313 00:13:02,665 --> 00:13:06,168 The websites he's visited are just disgusting! 314 00:13:06,293 --> 00:13:08,003 May I use this a moment? 315 00:13:08,129 --> 00:13:10,506 Sure. Type in any name. 316 00:13:10,631 --> 00:13:13,467 It'll show you everything they've ever done online. 317 00:13:13,592 --> 00:13:17,680 Be careful. You might not like what you see. 318 00:13:32,903 --> 00:13:34,363 What the hell am I gonna do, Butters? 319 00:13:34,488 --> 00:13:36,699 I can't live without Heidi. I know I'll be miserable. 320 00:13:36,824 --> 00:13:39,410 But I also can't live on the cum and joke mines of Mars. 321 00:13:39,535 --> 00:13:41,454 Gee, I don't know what to tell you, buddy. 322 00:13:41,579 --> 00:13:42,955 If I stay on Earth where the Internet is, 323 00:13:43,080 --> 00:13:44,832 Heidi finds out I know women aren't actually funny. 324 00:13:44,957 --> 00:13:47,001 And if I go to Mars, I get milked like a goat. 325 00:13:48,210 --> 00:13:49,336 What?! 326 00:13:49,462 --> 00:13:51,046 Butters, where the fuck are you?! 327 00:13:51,172 --> 00:13:53,048 Well, I'm at SpaceX. Where are you? 328 00:13:53,174 --> 00:13:54,717 SpaceX? Why? 329 00:13:54,842 --> 00:13:56,802 Well, we sort of created this ginormic energy source, 330 00:13:56,927 --> 00:13:58,846 but now we're trying to figure out what to do with it. 331 00:14:00,181 --> 00:14:02,892 Like how ginormic of an energy source? 332 00:14:03,017 --> 00:14:05,186 Like enough to get humanity to Mars. 333 00:14:05,311 --> 00:14:06,395 Is that Kyle? 334 00:14:06,520 --> 00:14:07,521 Kyle, do you mind? 335 00:14:07,646 --> 00:14:09,482 I'm having really big girl problems right now. 336 00:14:09,607 --> 00:14:12,651 Cartman, I think we might be able to help each other. 337 00:14:12,777 --> 00:14:14,779 Skank, there's no time! 338 00:14:14,904 --> 00:14:16,489 Have you found the last breaker? 339 00:14:16,614 --> 00:14:17,740 I think so. 340 00:14:17,865 --> 00:14:19,909 I-I'm up on some kind of bridgeway. 341 00:14:20,034 --> 00:14:21,702 The last breaker should be there. 342 00:14:21,827 --> 00:14:23,078 Headed to it now. 343 00:14:25,790 --> 00:14:28,250 I'm 10 steps ahead of you. 344 00:14:28,375 --> 00:14:30,961 What's the matter, Skankhunt? 345 00:14:31,086 --> 00:14:33,923 You just can't stand to be outdone, huh? 346 00:14:36,383 --> 00:14:39,094 Get out of my way. What you're doing is wrong! 347 00:14:39,220 --> 00:14:42,097 What I'm doing is wrong? 348 00:14:42,223 --> 00:14:44,767 How is getting millions of people to kill themselves 349 00:14:44,892 --> 00:14:46,769 different from getting one person to? 350 00:14:46,894 --> 00:14:49,688 It's completely heartless and malicious. 351 00:14:49,814 --> 00:14:52,483 You can honestly stand there, as a troll, 352 00:14:52,608 --> 00:14:55,402 and tell me what I'm doing isn't hilarious? 353 00:14:55,528 --> 00:14:57,112 No. It's not. 354 00:14:57,238 --> 00:14:58,197 Hacking the world to show 355 00:14:58,322 --> 00:14:59,782 that most people act differently online 356 00:14:59,907 --> 00:15:01,742 isn't even technically satirical. 357 00:15:01,867 --> 00:15:03,244 How is it not satirical? 358 00:15:07,164 --> 00:15:08,541 There's nothing here. 359 00:15:09,667 --> 00:15:12,044 Maybe Kyle was telling the truth. 360 00:15:12,169 --> 00:15:13,128 Oh, Laura! 361 00:15:13,254 --> 00:15:15,464 I think my boys were being honest with me. 362 00:15:15,589 --> 00:15:16,549 About what? 363 00:15:16,674 --> 00:15:19,468 I accused Ike of... of... I can't really say. 364 00:15:19,593 --> 00:15:21,428 But this thing says he's clean. 365 00:15:21,554 --> 00:15:24,765 I got to find my boys, Laura. Thank you so much. 366 00:15:24,890 --> 00:15:27,810 It's not our kids we have to worry about. 367 00:15:27,935 --> 00:15:31,021 My husband was on three married-but-dating websites. 368 00:15:31,146 --> 00:15:34,275 He looked at porn 4,000 times in one month! 369 00:15:34,400 --> 00:15:36,902 Aren't you curious what your husband does? Huh? 370 00:15:37,027 --> 00:15:39,530 Sure he doesn't have any girlfriends? 371 00:15:42,741 --> 00:15:46,161 No, I-I have to respect Gerald's privacy. 372 00:15:46,287 --> 00:15:48,497 Sure, yeah. Respect. 373 00:15:48,622 --> 00:15:49,832 Nice of you to give him that. 374 00:15:49,957 --> 00:15:50,833 Come on. 375 00:15:50,958 --> 00:15:52,877 You really think you can resist the urge 376 00:15:53,002 --> 00:15:56,714 to type in his name just for a quick little look? 377 00:16:00,384 --> 00:16:02,303 Aaaaah! 378 00:16:02,428 --> 00:16:04,013 There's nothing more we can do. 379 00:16:04,138 --> 00:16:05,514 Nearly everyone is online, 380 00:16:05,639 --> 00:16:07,516 and we've diverted all the power we can. 381 00:16:07,641 --> 00:16:09,685 Mr. President, Troll Trace has been online 382 00:16:09,810 --> 00:16:10,936 for almost 15 minutes now. 383 00:16:11,061 --> 00:16:12,021 It's too late. 384 00:16:12,146 --> 00:16:13,689 We need to get you down to the bunker. 385 00:16:13,814 --> 00:16:16,025 Oh, I've got a bunker? Well, that's good. 386 00:16:16,150 --> 00:16:19,737 Mr. President, we have an urgent call from Kyle. 387 00:16:19,862 --> 00:16:21,864 Sorry, Kyle. Looks like it's not gonna work. 388 00:16:21,989 --> 00:16:24,241 Mr. Garrison, I might have just found a lot more energy. 389 00:16:24,366 --> 00:16:26,660 Is there any way the Pentagon can connect to SpaceX? 390 00:16:26,785 --> 00:16:29,038 SpaceX? What the fuck is that? 391 00:16:29,163 --> 00:16:31,040 You know, the company trying to find new forms of energy, 392 00:16:31,165 --> 00:16:32,666 create jobs, and get mankind to Mars. 393 00:16:32,791 --> 00:16:34,960 Okay, that's dumb, but go on. 394 00:16:36,837 --> 00:16:37,838 Okay, okay, look. 395 00:16:37,963 --> 00:16:40,382 What you're doing is just trying to prove that everyone 396 00:16:40,507 --> 00:16:43,052 is either a bad person or a snoop, right? 397 00:16:43,177 --> 00:16:44,553 So, how is that funny? 398 00:16:44,678 --> 00:16:46,180 That's not what I'm doing. 399 00:16:46,305 --> 00:16:47,973 I'm showing everyone that all this stuff 400 00:16:48,098 --> 00:16:50,267 they freak out over doesn't even matter. 401 00:16:50,392 --> 00:16:52,728 No, but see, that's just nihilism. 402 00:16:52,853 --> 00:16:54,063 Oh, come on! 403 00:16:54,188 --> 00:16:55,064 That is! 404 00:16:55,189 --> 00:16:56,273 So... So, wait. 405 00:16:56,398 --> 00:16:58,859 If you do some big, outrageous, offensive thing 406 00:16:58,984 --> 00:17:00,945 with a positive attitude, you're a satirist, 407 00:17:01,070 --> 00:17:03,280 but if you're cynical about it, then you're a nihilist? 408 00:17:03,405 --> 00:17:04,698 That's fucking ridiculous. 409 00:17:06,992 --> 00:17:10,245 You're trying to get people to go to war and kill each other. 410 00:17:10,371 --> 00:17:14,333 So maybe this is like the new postfunny era of satire. 411 00:17:18,504 --> 00:17:20,923 Attention, all SpaceX employees. 412 00:17:21,048 --> 00:17:23,926 Please evacuate the building immediately. 413 00:17:24,051 --> 00:17:26,929 We've just received a bomb threat from NASA. 414 00:17:27,054 --> 00:17:28,931 This is not a drill. 415 00:17:29,056 --> 00:17:31,141 The NASA terrorists are super-jelly of us. 416 00:17:31,266 --> 00:17:34,061 Please quietly and calmly find the nearest exit 417 00:17:34,186 --> 00:17:36,188 and get the fuck out as fast as you can. 418 00:17:36,313 --> 00:17:37,481 Ah! 419 00:17:37,606 --> 00:17:38,899 Oh, hey, babe. W-What's up? 420 00:17:39,024 --> 00:17:40,109 There's a bomb threat? 421 00:17:40,234 --> 00:17:41,276 Oh, yeah, I was just, um... 422 00:17:41,402 --> 00:17:42,778 They told me on the stifernisy thing. 423 00:17:42,903 --> 00:17:43,779 It was spinning. 424 00:17:43,904 --> 00:17:45,030 Come on. We better get out. 425 00:17:45,155 --> 00:17:47,282 Babe, is everything okay? 426 00:17:47,408 --> 00:17:48,993 You seem distant lately. 427 00:17:49,118 --> 00:17:51,996 Distant? Really? Oh, my God. I'm... I'm sorry. 428 00:17:52,121 --> 00:17:53,789 Did I do something wrong? 429 00:17:53,914 --> 00:17:56,458 No. No, Heidi. Why would you think that? 430 00:17:56,583 --> 00:17:59,461 You don't really talk to me the same way you used to. 431 00:17:59,586 --> 00:18:01,463 Oh, God. I'm sounding needy, huh? 432 00:18:01,588 --> 00:18:03,716 Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Yeah, go on. 433 00:18:03,841 --> 00:18:07,511 Eric, I just... I hope you're always honest with me, 434 00:18:07,636 --> 00:18:09,722 even if you think it might hurt my feelings. 435 00:18:09,847 --> 00:18:11,473 Uh-huh. Yeah, cool. 436 00:18:11,598 --> 00:18:14,268 Heidi, I'll always do what's best for both of us. 437 00:18:14,393 --> 00:18:16,311 Now, come on. We got to get outside. 438 00:18:24,862 --> 00:18:26,822 I shouldn't do this. 439 00:18:26,947 --> 00:18:29,700 I can't argue with you anymore. 440 00:18:29,825 --> 00:18:31,326 I want to stand here and tell you 441 00:18:31,452 --> 00:18:34,163 that you and I are different, but it's not true. 442 00:18:34,288 --> 00:18:37,374 All we've been doing is making excuses 443 00:18:37,499 --> 00:18:39,126 for being horrible people. 444 00:18:39,251 --> 00:18:44,548 I don't know if you tried to teach me a lesson, but you have. 445 00:18:44,673 --> 00:18:47,092 I have to stand here and look at you, 446 00:18:47,217 --> 00:18:50,929 and all I see is a big, fat reflection of myself. 447 00:18:51,055 --> 00:18:53,849 With only one minor difference. 448 00:18:53,974 --> 00:18:55,601 Oof! 449 00:18:55,726 --> 00:18:58,687 Noooo! 450 00:18:58,812 --> 00:19:01,231 Ha! Fuck you! 451 00:19:01,356 --> 00:19:04,735 What I do is fucking funny, bitch! 452 00:19:08,781 --> 00:19:10,699 That's it! Your dad's got it! 453 00:19:10,824 --> 00:19:12,367 Give it everything you've got! 454 00:19:12,493 --> 00:19:13,869 Mr. President, do it! 455 00:19:13,994 --> 00:19:16,371 Reroute the Internet through SpaceX! 456 00:19:16,497 --> 00:19:17,831 Rerouting now! 457 00:19:48,862 --> 00:19:51,198 What the hell just happened? 458 00:20:04,878 --> 00:20:06,755 Well, looks like you're gonna have to 459 00:20:06,880 --> 00:20:09,842 kind of start over, huh, Elon? 460 00:20:09,967 --> 00:20:12,719 Maybe you should just go back to your little cars, huh? 461 00:20:12,845 --> 00:20:13,762 Wow, babe. 462 00:20:13,887 --> 00:20:15,055 Looks like all our dreams 463 00:20:15,180 --> 00:20:16,932 are kind of on hold for a while, huh? 464 00:20:17,057 --> 00:20:19,017 Yeah, well, some people's dreams 465 00:20:19,143 --> 00:20:20,769 are other people's nightmares. 466 00:20:20,894 --> 00:20:22,813 Well, what do you mean? 467 00:20:22,938 --> 00:20:24,439 It was a joke. 468 00:20:31,697 --> 00:20:34,032 And so life goes on. 469 00:20:34,158 --> 00:20:38,453 The end of civilization didn't happen. 470 00:20:38,579 --> 00:20:42,541 A massive electric pulse completely erased the Internet. 471 00:20:42,666 --> 00:20:45,169 We've been given a second chance. 472 00:20:46,378 --> 00:20:47,379 A mulligan. 473 00:20:48,922 --> 00:20:52,593 Anything we might be ashamed of, gone forever. 474 00:20:56,346 --> 00:20:57,639 Maybe now boys and girls 475 00:20:57,764 --> 00:20:59,850 can learn to respect each other again... 476 00:21:02,144 --> 00:21:04,855 ...realize how careful our online lives have to be. 477 00:21:08,609 --> 00:21:11,737 Because we've all seen what happens when the Twitters, 478 00:21:11,862 --> 00:21:15,449 Facebooks, and trolls decide our reality. 479 00:21:15,574 --> 00:21:17,743 Now that we've been given this second chance, 480 00:21:17,868 --> 00:21:20,829 it's up to all of us to see what we do with it. 481 00:21:20,954 --> 00:21:24,291 And the first new e-mail since the Internet was erased 482 00:21:24,416 --> 00:21:27,377 successfully went out at 6:00 a.m. today. 483 00:21:27,502 --> 00:21:29,504 The honor went to a Mr. Dave Beckett 484 00:21:29,630 --> 00:21:31,423 of Boca Raton, Florida. 485 00:21:31,548 --> 00:21:34,343 Mr. Beckett, you had the honor of being the first person 486 00:21:34,468 --> 00:21:36,094 to socialize on the new Internet. 487 00:21:36,220 --> 00:21:37,763 Can you tell us what you did? 488 00:21:37,888 --> 00:21:40,557 Well, I sent an e-mail with a photo 489 00:21:40,682 --> 00:21:43,852 to my old friend Thomas Winger up in Connecticut. 490 00:21:43,977 --> 00:21:46,939 And what did you say to Mr. Winger? 491 00:21:48,899 --> 00:21:50,984 I showed him my dick, called him a fag.