1
00:02:13,039 --> 00:02:16,439
Ok children it's Friday and you know
what that means for PE class.

2
00:02:16,440 --> 00:02:19,193
We're gonna play dodgeball!

3
00:02:20,520 --> 00:02:22,049
- We don't wanna play dodgeball.
It hurts.

4
00:02:22,050 --> 00:02:26,750
So let's have half of the children on this
side, and half the children on that side.

5
00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:29,440
Excuse me a moment gentlemen, I don't
believe I know how to play dodgeball.

6
00:02:29,560 --> 00:02:33,189
- What? Don't you have dodgeball in France?
- Well no. And actually I'm not from France.

7
00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:34,520
Look Pip the rules are simple.

8
00:02:34,521 --> 00:02:37,621
The kid from that team is gonna try to beam
the kid on our team with a big red ball.

9
00:02:37,760 --> 00:02:41,036
- Oh dear.  - If the ball hits you, you're
out. But if you catch the ball, he's out.

10
00:02:41,160 --> 00:02:44,516
- And the last team to still have anybody
standing wins. - Oh what jolly good fun!

11
00:02:44,640 --> 00:02:47,393
No it isn't it hurts! I can't believe
they let us play this in school.

12
00:02:48,160 --> 00:02:49,639
Play ball!

13
00:02:51,920 --> 00:02:55,754
- Damn it, we lost one already.
- You're out Clyde.

14
00:02:55,880 --> 00:02:58,519
Jordan, Swatson, pull forward!
We need backup!

15
00:03:00,240 --> 00:03:02,595
We're loosing men fast out here!

16
00:03:02,720 --> 00:03:05,996
Concentrate on your game.
Be the ball.

17
00:03:07,560 --> 00:03:11,678
- I caught it! I caught it! - Great catch
Kyle. Now your team's on offense.

18
00:03:11,800 --> 00:03:13,916
- Here Pip, you throw it.
- Uh, oh no I couldn't.

19
00:03:14,040 --> 00:03:15,380
- Come on limey. Don't be a wuss!

20
00:03:15,381 --> 00:03:17,919
Are you just gonna be a French pansy
your whole life? - I'm not French...

21
00:03:17,920 --> 00:03:19,356
Throw the ball you stupid frog.

22
00:03:19,400 --> 00:03:22,819
God damn maybe if you didn't eat all
those crossaints be able to get...

23
00:03:22,960 --> 00:03:26,794
Ok, that was pretty good Pip, but you're
supposed to hit the kids on the other team.

24
00:03:26,920 --> 00:03:28,797
Ow my nose!
You broke my nose!

25
00:03:28,920 --> 00:03:32,117
- Damn Pip, I didn't know you had it
in you. - Oh, I'm dreadfully sorry!

26
00:03:32,240 --> 00:03:38,190
That nose is bleeding pretty bad Kyle. I think
you might have to go to the nurse's office.

27
00:03:39,160 --> 00:03:43,551
- No! No it'll be ok. - Sorry son,
you'll have to let the nurse look at it.

28
00:03:43,680 --> 00:03:45,159
Come on!

29
00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:48,512
Dude. He's going to
the nurse's office.

30
00:03:48,640 --> 00:03:51,374
- I heard the school nurse
is heidiously deformed.

31
00:03:51,375 --> 00:03:53,875
I heard she has tentacles and
eats children for lunch.

32
00:03:53,920 --> 00:03:59,119
Stan? Has anybody actually seen the
nurse, and come back to tell about it?

33
00:03:59,240 --> 00:04:01,754
No Cartman.
Nobody ever has.

34
00:04:15,320 --> 00:04:20,474
Are you Kyle Broslofski? - Ye.. Yes. - I'm
the school nurse, did you hurt your nose?

35
00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:23,478
Young man, why do you have your
eyes closed? I'm not gonna hurt you.

36
00:04:23,600 --> 00:04:26,114
- I know.
- So open them.

37
00:04:30,760 --> 00:04:33,797
- Now, what seems to be the problem?
- Oh, I just hit my nose playing dodgeball.

38
00:04:33,920 --> 00:04:36,036
Oh, well I'll get you an ice-pack.

39
00:04:39,840 --> 00:04:45,793
Oh, I see you've noticed my disorder. I have a
still born fetus growth attached to my head.

40
00:04:47,960 --> 00:04:51,430
And when she moved up and
down, the little fetus jiggled.

41
00:04:51,560 --> 00:04:55,189
- Did it talk? The little fetus, did it talk?
- No! No it looked dead!

42
00:04:56,200 --> 00:05:00,113
- Was it wearing clothes? - Dude! Where's
she gonna get fetus clothes?

43
00:05:02,640 --> 00:05:05,074
- And then she walked over...
- Kyle! That is enough!

44
00:05:05,200 --> 00:05:09,432
I've been reading up on your poor nurse's
condition, and it is nothing to be made fun of.

45
00:05:09,560 --> 00:05:13,300
- It's called conjoined twin myslexia.
- Who the hell cares what it's called!

46
00:05:13,301 --> 00:05:14,401
As long as she doesn't touch me!

47
00:05:14,440 --> 00:05:19,150
Now that's just the kind of unawairness that
we need to fight against. Sit down boys.

48
00:05:19,880 --> 00:05:23,793
You see boys, sometimes when babies
are born, they're born as twins.

49
00:05:23,920 --> 00:05:28,869
But sometimes the twins get hooked together
and they're born as Siamese twins.

50
00:05:29,720 --> 00:05:34,874
Sometimes, after the Siamese twins are joined
together, one of the twins dies before birth.

51
00:05:35,000 --> 00:05:38,072
The living baby is born, with
the dead baby still attached.

52
00:05:38,200 --> 00:05:41,397
Sometimes, the dead twin
is inside the living person,

53
00:05:41,520 --> 00:05:45,229
so even you could have a dead twin
inside you and not even know it!

54
00:05:47,320 --> 00:05:49,927
So now that you're edjucated
about her disease,

55
00:05:49,928 --> 00:05:52,228
you won't need to make
fun of her, right boobie?

56
00:05:52,380 --> 00:05:53,500
Uhh... yeah.

57
00:05:59,240 --> 00:06:02,232
Can you imagine that
poor, poor woman.

58
00:06:02,360 --> 00:06:05,158
Feeling like an outcast,
being ridiculed every day.

59
00:06:08,360 --> 00:06:11,955
- Hello Sheila? It's Sharon. Stan's mother?
- Oh yes, hello Sharon.

60
00:06:12,080 --> 00:06:15,072
Sheila, I was just wondering if
you might know why my son

61
00:06:15,200 --> 00:06:18,795
is trying to split his head open with
an icepick? - No! I have to get it out!

62
00:06:18,880 --> 00:06:23,237
Well Sharon, I was just trying to edjucate
them about conjoined twin myslexia.

63
00:06:23,360 --> 00:06:26,033
So this is your fault!

64
00:06:26,160 --> 00:06:28,444
Would you do me a favor? Next time you
wanna scare the hell out of my child,

65
00:06:28,445 --> 00:06:32,045
just go outside and sit in the road till
a truck runs you over instead.

66
00:06:32,160 --> 00:06:37,188
That does it! I must edjucate the
entire town about this awful disease.

67
00:06:39,560 --> 00:06:41,856
Dude, I don't get it. Why are we
playing dodgeball again?

68
00:06:41,857 --> 00:06:43,757
Yeah. I thought we only
played on Fridays.

69
00:06:43,800 --> 00:06:48,590
Children! Great news! We've been asked
to play in the state finals for dodgeball!

70
00:06:49,760 --> 00:06:52,957
- Do we have to? - Can't we just play with
that big parachute again or something?

71
00:06:53,080 --> 00:06:54,694
You don't understand children.

72
00:06:54,695 --> 00:06:58,395
If we can win state, we can play
in the nationals in Washington DC.

73
00:06:58,400 --> 00:07:00,619
- Hey! They have a zoo there!
- That's right.

74
00:07:00,620 --> 00:07:03,820
Now come on, we have
a lot of practicing to do.

75
00:07:03,920 --> 00:07:06,620
Aren't we supposed to have won
something in order to go to state finals?

76
00:07:06,621 --> 00:07:07,621
Hey Pip? You wanna be
on my team again?

77
00:07:08,200 --> 00:07:08,965
Oh I'd love to!

78
00:07:08,966 --> 00:07:12,266
Oh, just try not to send anybody to
that monster nurse this time, Frenchie.

79
00:07:12,320 --> 00:07:14,688
Hey! I get quite disturbed
when you call me that.

80
00:07:14,689 --> 00:07:17,229
You shouldn't make fun of foreigners.
And besides I hate French people.

81
00:07:22,480 --> 00:07:26,560
Well Mrs.Broslofski, it certainly is
a thrill seeing you cheery face again.

82
00:07:26,561 --> 00:07:28,061
What seems to be pissing
you off today?

83
00:07:28,120 --> 00:07:31,599
Nothing is pissing me off. I just
want to start a movement.

84
00:07:31,600 --> 00:07:32,900
Ahh, of course you do.

85
00:07:32,960 --> 00:07:35,758
I wanna talk to you all
about your school nurse.

86
00:07:36,480 --> 00:07:41,474
- Nurse Gulemn is absolutely qualified to be...
- No, no, no. I'm not upset about her.

87
00:07:41,600 --> 00:07:44,230
I want to make the public
aware of her.

88
00:07:44,231 --> 00:07:48,331
Her disease should be brought to light so that it
can be understood rather than made fun of.

89
00:07:48,480 --> 00:07:50,356
Ooh, and now what disease it that?

90
00:07:50,357 --> 00:07:55,357
Principal Victoria, Nurse Gollum
has conjoined twin myslexia.

91
00:07:55,440 --> 00:07:58,477
- What's that? - She has a dead
fetus attached to her head.

92
00:07:58,600 --> 00:08:01,910
- Gasp! She does??
- You uh, you never noticed that?

93
00:08:02,080 --> 00:08:05,868
- No, I never did. - Well that's
exactly what I'm talking about.

94
00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:10,312
This poor woman is forced to live in the
shadows because she feels like an outcast.

95
00:08:10,440 --> 00:08:14,319
It is up to us to make her feel
comfortable and welcome in out town.

96
00:08:14,440 --> 00:08:17,637
Did you say a fetus?
Sticking out from her head?

97
00:08:17,760 --> 00:08:21,355
I want to invite your nurse to a dinner
party at my house this evening.

98
00:08:21,480 --> 00:08:24,556
I'd appreciate if both you and
Mr.Mackey would attend.

99
00:08:24,557 --> 00:08:26,557
Do we have to eat Kosher stuff?

100
00:08:26,600 --> 00:08:30,275
I'll talk to nurse Gollum, but I'm sure
she'd be delighted. Say around 8?

101
00:08:30,400 --> 00:08:34,154
- Wonderful! - Now you did say
she has a fetus, on her head?

102
00:08:37,040 --> 00:08:41,033
Ok children, now who's
gonna win the state finals?

103
00:08:42,160 --> 00:08:45,789
- Denver? - Here we go
cows, here we go, uh-uh.

104
00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:47,951
Here we go cows here we go, uh-uh.

105
00:08:52,120 --> 00:08:55,271
- I think we need to get off on this exit.
- Sit down kid!!!

106
00:08:55,400 --> 00:09:00,428
- But it's quicker to get to the Denver school
that way! - Do you want an office referal?

107
00:09:00,560 --> 00:09:03,482
How many times do I have to explain
this to you, I'm not a student.

108
00:09:03,483 --> 00:09:04,783
You can't give me an office referal.

109
00:09:04,840 --> 00:09:08,037
- I said sit down!!!!
- Yes ma'am.

110
00:09:11,980 --> 00:09:13,652
Whoa dude!
This is the school?

111
00:09:15,740 --> 00:09:18,857
Hello there. I'm Bob Thomas,
the coach for the Denver Cougars.

112
00:09:18,980 --> 00:09:20,937
I'm Chef, coach of the South Park cows.

113
00:09:21,000 --> 00:09:23,850
Well I certainly wanna thank you
for bringing your team down.

114
00:09:23,980 --> 00:09:27,177
Apparently nobody else would play us,
because they knew we'd just beat 'em silly.

115
00:09:27,300 --> 00:09:30,569
So I told the school board to find me
some hick school from the mountains,

116
00:09:30,570 --> 00:09:33,649
and here you are. You're from
South Park, yeah? - Yeah.

117
00:09:33,780 --> 00:09:36,055
My god, amazing where
people can live nowadays.

118
00:09:36,300 --> 00:09:39,707
Well we might as well get this overwith,
we gotta start thinking about D.C.

119
00:09:39,708 --> 00:09:41,708
Promise we won't make it too painful.

120
00:09:42,580 --> 00:09:44,059
Play ball!

121
00:09:52,700 --> 00:09:56,932
- So where did you get your degree,
Nurse Gollum? - Colorado State.

122
00:10:02,060 --> 00:10:05,848
Sheila, could you pass me the
dead fetus? I mean gravy!

123
00:10:13,580 --> 00:10:16,538
Damn it! Come on!
Somebody catch the ball.

124
00:10:16,660 --> 00:10:19,936
Alright boys, just 5 more of
the little bastards to go.

125
00:10:22,220 --> 00:10:26,054
- I caught it! I caught it!  - That's not
fair! He's so fat, it stuck in his belly!

126
00:10:26,180 --> 00:10:30,332
- South Park on offense! - Great job
children! Just stay focused now.

127
00:10:30,460 --> 00:10:32,576
- Go for it, Pip.
- Oh bother.

128
00:10:32,700 --> 00:10:34,497
Come on you Frenchie little frog!

129
00:10:36,180 --> 00:10:37,659
Great shot Pip!

130
00:10:39,780 --> 00:10:44,615
So I heard that the South Park cows are
playing for the State Finals in dodgeball tonight.

131
00:10:44,740 --> 00:10:49,256
Yeah, but it doesn't matter. The
Denver team always wins, mmkay.

132
00:10:49,860 --> 00:10:53,694
Oh I don't know. I think our boys just
might have the dead fetus to win. Heart!

133
00:10:53,820 --> 00:10:57,859
- Gerald! Keep your damn mouth shut!
- It's ok Mrs.Broslofski, really.

134
00:10:57,980 --> 00:11:02,098
- Please, forgive us, I'm terribly sorry
Nurse Gollum. - No, I'm quite secure with it.

135
00:11:02,220 --> 00:11:05,690
I have felt so bad ever since I
heard the boys making fun of you.

136
00:11:05,820 --> 00:11:06,770
They're just young boys.

137
00:11:06,771 --> 00:11:10,171
Joking is a way for them to come to
terms with what they don't understand.

138
00:11:10,260 --> 00:11:11,820
Could I get some more pork?

139
00:11:11,821 --> 00:11:14,221
So did you ever think of you
just you know, having it cut off?

140
00:11:14,300 --> 00:11:18,532
Yes, Principal Victoria, the thought had occured
to me, unfortunately it would mean my death.

141
00:11:18,660 --> 00:11:22,335
- Oh! So I suppose that's out. How about
a hat then? - No, really I don't need...

142
00:11:22,460 --> 00:11:26,578
Yes! We could get you a few hats, and you
could wear a different one every day.

143
00:11:26,700 --> 00:11:29,699
I really appreciate what you're trying
to do here, but it's not necessary.

144
00:11:29,700 --> 00:11:30,900
I'm a pretty happy person.

145
00:11:30,980 --> 00:11:36,418
Got it! We could set aside a whole week to
make the public aware of folks just like you!

146
00:11:36,540 --> 00:11:40,897
Oh yes, a conjoined twin myslexia awareness
week. You know that has a nice ring.

147
00:11:41,020 --> 00:11:44,410
- I really don't think... - The school
could put out pamphlets, mmkay.

148
00:11:44,540 --> 00:11:47,338
And we could have seminars
to edjucate, mmkay.

149
00:11:47,460 --> 00:11:51,658
Oh this is so exciting! I'm gonna get
the mayor on the phone right now!

150
00:11:59,700 --> 00:12:04,091
You got just one more Pip. You get
this kid, and we are state champions.

151
00:12:04,220 --> 00:12:07,769
Yeah, and if you don't you're a big
dumbass European hippie piece of crap.

152
00:12:08,820 --> 00:12:10,458
Get 'em, Frenchie!

153
00:12:12,340 --> 00:12:17,937
- South Park wins! - We did it children!
We did it! We're going to Washington DC!

154
00:12:18,540 --> 00:12:24,456
It hurts! Mommie it hurts!

155
00:12:31,380 --> 00:12:34,770
Oh sorry about wooping
yo ass there, coach.

156
00:12:34,900 --> 00:12:38,734
Oooh baby come on,
just woop give it ass.

157
00:12:38,860 --> 00:12:43,570
Gonna need some creme on yo
ass, it's all swollen and red.

158
00:12:43,700 --> 00:12:47,773
Ladies and gentlemen this is indeed
a great week for South Park.

159
00:12:47,900 --> 00:12:50,573
Mrs. Herman has opened the
east wing of the library,

160
00:12:50,700 --> 00:12:56,491
and our own South Park cows elementary school
dodgeball team is going to the national finals.

161
00:12:56,620 --> 00:12:59,930
Where they will undoubtly be beaten
senseless by the Washington team.

162
00:13:01,380 --> 00:13:06,738
But most importantly this week has brought to
my attention a very serious and dreaded disease.

163
00:13:06,860 --> 00:13:09,296
Conjoined twin myslexia.

164
00:13:09,297 --> 00:13:13,897
And so it is in honor of this that
I declare this exciting week as...

165
00:13:13,900 --> 00:13:17,177
"Conjoined Twin Myslexia Week".

166
00:13:17,300 --> 00:13:24,138
And now let's kick off our week long festivities
with the first anual grand conjoined parade!

167
00:13:24,260 --> 00:13:27,570
Let's hear it for
these brave souls!

168
00:13:36,020 --> 00:13:41,299
What a glorious parade that was. Let's
hear it for the parade coordinators!

169
00:13:43,620 --> 00:13:45,994
You know Mayor, I really should be
accompanying those kids to

170
00:13:46,000 --> 00:13:48,054
Washington incase hey
get hurt. That is my job.

171
00:13:48,460 --> 00:13:51,657
Nonsense. This is your week,
you aren't going anywhere.

172
00:13:51,780 --> 00:13:54,738
- How much further is Washington DC?
- Sit down, kid!!!

173
00:13:54,860 --> 00:13:58,455
- I need to know how far it is, lady.
- I said SIT DOWN!!!!!

174
00:13:58,580 --> 00:14:02,209
- Yeah, whatever you old dried up
fat hog. - What did you say??

175
00:14:02,340 --> 00:14:06,049
- I said, I've always wanted to
visit Prague. - Oh, me too.

176
00:14:07,060 --> 00:14:10,257
- Ok, what've you got?
- Some gefilte fish, some gafaga.

177
00:14:10,380 --> 00:14:13,292
- I got a jelly roll! I got a jelly roll!
- Sweet! Jelly roll's perfect!

178
00:14:13,580 --> 00:14:15,650
Places.

179
00:14:23,340 --> 00:14:26,377
Damn man. This is the
bigtime alright.

180
00:14:26,500 --> 00:14:28,811
- Chef, we're hungry.
- You can eat after the game.

181
00:14:28,812 --> 00:14:31,412
You children win this one and
you're national champions.

182
00:14:31,540 --> 00:14:33,355
Then you can go on
and play the Chinese.

183
00:14:33,356 --> 00:14:35,756
My mom says there's a lot
of black people in China.

184
00:14:35,820 --> 00:14:37,697
- What?
- Are you Chef?

185
00:14:37,820 --> 00:14:41,699
The Washington team has forfitted the game.
Congradulations, you're national champions.

186
00:14:41,820 --> 00:14:44,698
What? We did it!
Children we won!

187
00:14:44,820 --> 00:14:48,495
- That was easy. - Ladies and gentlemen
let's hear a round of applause for the new

188
00:14:48,620 --> 00:14:53,057
national champions of dodgeball,
The South Park Cows!

189
00:14:54,820 --> 00:14:57,493
- Hey, why did you guys forfit?
- You mean you don't know?

190
00:14:57,620 --> 00:15:00,499
Last year's national champions
were the Austin Pirates.

191
00:15:00,500 --> 00:15:02,700
They played China for the
world championship.

192
00:15:02,860 --> 00:15:07,251
Only 4 of them came back alive. Chinese
dodgeball players aren't like us.

193
00:15:12,780 --> 00:15:15,374
They do nothing but dodgeball.
Day in and day out.

194
00:15:15,500 --> 00:15:20,369
They use steroids and training equipment
to make them not kids, but animals.

195
00:15:23,220 --> 00:15:27,577
- Well good luck, we've got our futures to
think about. - Ok, children, back in the bus.

196
00:15:30,020 --> 00:15:34,745
And so as we have this honorary dinner,
we take a look back at Nurse Gollum,

197
00:15:34,746 --> 00:15:36,446
and the brave life
she has lived.

198
00:15:36,580 --> 00:15:39,299
- Roll the tape please Mr.Garrison.
- Oh no!

199
00:15:40,580 --> 00:15:44,255
You've got the strength,
you've got the courage.

200
00:15:44,380 --> 00:15:48,259
Even with a dead
fetus on your head.

201
00:15:48,460 --> 00:15:53,534
Carry on!
You fight for tomorrow!

202
00:15:53,660 --> 00:15:58,415
Dead fetus you know,
you never let go.

203
00:15:58,540 --> 00:16:05,013
You're my conjoined twin dead thing
hanging off your head woman.

204
00:16:05,140 --> 00:16:07,370
Oh, that was so touching.

205
00:16:07,500 --> 00:16:12,654
And now friends, it's time to present
lifetime conjoined twin achievement award.

206
00:16:12,780 --> 00:16:17,251
This award goes to outstanding conjoined
twins who have made a mark on society.

207
00:16:17,380 --> 00:16:21,055
- And the winner is...
- Nurse Gollum.

208
00:16:21,180 --> 00:16:23,296
Nurse Gollum!

209
00:16:24,700 --> 00:16:29,137
- Oh boy. - Excuse me Mayor, but I just received
some news that you might all be interested in.

210
00:16:29,260 --> 00:16:32,526
Our South Park cows have just beaten
the Washington dodgeball team,

211
00:16:32,527 --> 00:16:36,927
and are on their way to the
world championship in China.

212
00:16:37,140 --> 00:16:42,339
Now we're almost to China. I want
you all to try and focus on the game.

213
00:16:42,460 --> 00:16:44,272
- But Chef we don't
wanna play the Chinese!

214
00:16:44,273 --> 00:16:47,173
Nonsense! If we win this one,
we're world champions.

215
00:16:47,220 --> 00:16:50,849
- But we could get killed! - And just what
price would you pay for you trying to blow it.

216
00:16:50,980 --> 00:16:56,213
Just imagine and big yellow dodgeball champions
bear hanging in the cafeteria. Imagine it!

217
00:16:56,340 --> 00:16:59,013
- Dude, Chef has lost it.
- You'll be on the news all over the world.

218
00:16:59,140 --> 00:17:04,373
South Park will finally have a sport that
it's good at. Ooh children, it'll be glorious.

219
00:17:04,500 --> 00:17:08,618
So, Captain Ahab has to
get his whale, huh?

220
00:17:08,740 --> 00:17:10,651
- Dude, what does that mean?
- I don't know.

221
00:17:10,780 --> 00:17:14,455
- Hey isn't that kid Kevin Chinese?
- Yeah, you're from China.

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00:17:14,580 --> 00:17:18,493
- No, I'm from America. My parents are Chinese.
- Tell us how the Chinese play dodgeball!

223
00:17:18,620 --> 00:17:21,293
- I have no idea dude.
- Come on rice picker!

224
00:17:21,740 --> 00:17:23,983
Hey, hey, hey! Children,
that's not cool.

225
00:17:23,984 --> 00:17:26,884
You don't make fun of somebody
because of their ethnicity.

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00:17:26,980 --> 00:17:29,540
- You don't? - But Chef, you
just ripped on Chinese people.

227
00:17:29,660 --> 00:17:34,051
No, no, no, no ,no, that's different. I made
fun of them because they are from China.

228
00:17:34,180 --> 00:17:38,014
You see it's not ok to make fun of an American
because they're black brown or whatever.

229
00:17:38,140 --> 00:17:42,213
But it is ok to make fun of foreigners
because they're from another country.

230
00:17:52,220 --> 00:17:55,974
Let the world champion
of dodgeball be decided.

231
00:18:01,420 --> 00:18:02,899
Damn dude, China's fucked up.

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00:18:03,020 --> 00:18:06,774
- Take places. - Alright, lets go
cows. Let's show em what we got!

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00:18:06,900 --> 00:18:11,052
Ok, Tom, looks like the Americans
are getting ready to play.

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00:18:11,180 --> 00:18:16,971
I don't supposed they'll have any problem
seeing the ball with their BIG American eyes.

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00:18:18,460 --> 00:18:21,197
Yeah good thing they have
those big eyes so they

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00:18:21,198 --> 00:18:24,998
don't have to rely on that
amazing American intellect

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00:18:28,180 --> 00:18:30,136
Pray bra!

238
00:18:33,220 --> 00:18:34,812
Holy crap.

239
00:18:37,060 --> 00:18:38,539
God damn!

240
00:18:38,660 --> 00:18:44,018
Hey, hey, what do you call a white American
person with a PHD in physics and math?

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00:18:44,140 --> 00:18:47,576
- I don't know, wrat?
- Stupid American!

242
00:18:52,500 --> 00:18:55,060
Oh, another American is down.

243
00:18:55,180 --> 00:18:59,776
 It's number, oh I don't know.
All Americans look alike.

244
00:19:05,100 --> 00:19:08,331
- Oh my god! They killed Kenny.
- You... bastards...

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00:19:08,460 --> 00:19:14,899
Oh my, I haven't seen an American
die like that since Abraham Lincoln!

246
00:19:15,020 --> 00:19:18,410
Dude that is not cool. You're
gonna get us into trouble again.

247
00:19:19,020 --> 00:19:23,093
Ladies and gentlemen on this 4th day
of cojoined twin myslexia week

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00:19:23,220 --> 00:19:27,611
all our prayers are with our little South Park
cows now playing their hearts out in China.

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00:19:28,180 --> 00:19:33,095
Now join me in saluting our cows and help
make Nurse Gollum not feel like an outcast

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00:19:33,220 --> 00:19:36,929
with our first official conjoined
twin myslexia hats!

251
00:19:43,660 --> 00:19:46,697
And there is only one more
South Park player left.

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00:19:46,820 --> 00:19:51,496
Still all Chinese players.
This simply all is very sorry.

253
00:19:52,780 --> 00:19:57,410
- Come on! Throw ball! - Hey you want
to head my impersonation of American?

254
00:19:59,540 --> 00:20:03,135
Hey, I really, really want
that. That hurts good.

255
00:20:05,580 --> 00:20:07,536
Hey hey hey.
Let me try, let me try.

256
00:20:08,660 --> 00:20:11,493
I'll use my credit card.

257
00:20:14,660 --> 00:20:16,776
Do you have any
non dairy creamer?

258
00:20:19,100 --> 00:20:21,250
You all come back now, you hear?

259
00:20:23,780 --> 00:20:25,498
Oh, what have I done?

260
00:20:28,060 --> 00:20:32,815
You know Eric, I just realized something. I've
been obsessed, and an obsession isn't good.

261
00:20:33,620 --> 00:20:36,311
If we had won the world
championship, what then?

262
00:20:36,312 --> 00:20:40,312
It would only be a bigger let down
next year if we didn't win.

263
00:20:40,700 --> 00:20:45,091
Our lives would have to revolve around
dodgeball. Our lives were fine before.

264
00:20:45,980 --> 00:20:50,258
Oh I'm sorry children, I let it all go to
my head. Can you ever forgive me?

265
00:20:51,580 --> 00:20:54,055
Come on. Forget this stupid
game. Let's go home.

266
00:20:55,300 --> 00:20:59,532
- Come on, throw ball! - Hey if you want
to make him throw the ball, say this.

267
00:21:00,620 --> 00:21:05,011
Hey you American dumbass,
you French piece of crap, throw ball.

268
00:21:05,140 --> 00:21:09,975
What's the matter Frenchie,
you got crepes in your ears?

269
00:21:23,620 --> 00:21:26,657
And the winner is
South Park cows.

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00:21:27,780 --> 00:21:30,897
Everyone, everyone look! I won
the game! We're world champions!

271
00:21:31,020 --> 00:21:35,491
Mr.Chef, Mr.Chef, South Park is the world
champion in dodgeball. Oh glorious day!

272
00:21:35,620 --> 00:21:38,180
- Shut up, Pip. - Yeah, shut
up Pip. Can we go home now?

273
00:21:38,300 --> 00:21:42,737
- Did you all see? I can't believe I threw such a
ball with my own arm. It was... - SHUT UP PIP!

274
00:21:43,860 --> 00:21:47,489
As our myslexia awareness
week draws to a close,

275
00:21:47,620 --> 00:21:52,489
I would like to personally thank all of
you for your enthusiastic cooperation.

276
00:21:52,620 --> 00:21:58,968
Now let's head it one more time for our
world champions South Park Cows!

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00:21:59,100 --> 00:22:04,094
- What the hell is everyone wearing on their heads?
- And now, let's hear from the woman of the week,

278
00:22:04,220 --> 00:22:07,849
the incredible, courageous, Nurse Gollum!

279
00:22:08,500 --> 00:22:10,456
- Dude it's the freak nurse!
- Holy crap!

280
00:22:10,580 --> 00:22:14,459
Damn it Kyle. We've been working
all week against that kind of behavior.

281
00:22:14,580 --> 00:22:17,697
- Well sorry dude, we weren't here.
- Thank you mayor.

282
00:22:17,820 --> 00:22:20,732
I ah, well I don't know what to say.
This has been quite a week.

283
00:22:20,860 --> 00:22:24,899
- She's really touched.
- What I really wanna say is,

284
00:22:25,020 --> 00:22:29,138
well this may sound off coming from woman
with a fetus sticking out of her head,

285
00:22:29,260 --> 00:22:32,650
but you're all a bunch of freaks!

286
00:22:34,620 --> 00:22:37,339
Uh, freaks with
big hearts! And now..

287
00:22:37,460 --> 00:22:41,612
Don't you realize that the last thing
I ever wanted was to be singled out?

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00:22:41,720 --> 00:22:45,554
I just wanted to do my job, and
live my life like any normal person,

289
00:22:45,680 --> 00:22:49,958
but instead you've made everybody
focus on my handycap all week long.

290
00:22:50,080 --> 00:22:55,313
Look I don't wanna be treated different. I don't
wanna be treated special or treated gingerly,

291
00:22:55,440 --> 00:22:59,638
I just wanna be ridiculed, shouted at and made
fun of like all the rest of you do to each other.

292
00:23:00,240 --> 00:23:03,073
And take those stupid
things off your heads!

293
00:23:05,640 --> 00:23:09,679
- Oh my what an ungrateful bitch.
- Yeh, the nerve of some people.

294
00:23:09,800 --> 00:23:11,871
- Hey you know that nurse
is actually pretty cool.

295
00:23:11,872 --> 00:23:14,372
Yeah, maybe that dead
fetus makes her smarter.

296
00:23:14,440 --> 00:23:16,351
I love you, guys.

297
00:23:18,600 --> 00:23:20,079
Ah, screw you guys.