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South Park - Season 12 Episode 4
"Canada On Strike"
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Students, quiet please, 'mkay.
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As you may or may not know, today
is Canada Appreciation Day.
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Oh god, I'm bored already.
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Okay. So we've been asked
to show you a video...
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from the World Canadian Bureau.
Start the tape, please.
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Hello, I am Steven Aboutman.
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President of the World Canadian Bureau.
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Do you ever stop to think how
important Canada is to the world?
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Right now, I would like all students of
Canadian descent in this school to stand up.
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Just look at all these fine
Canadians in your school.
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See how diverse they are.
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When you think of Canada, what's
the one thing that comes to mind?
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Gayness.
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That's right! Spirit!
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What is it that makes
Canada so important?
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Nothing!
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My fellow Canadians!
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For too long we have been
pushed around and ridiculed!
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Yesterday was supposed to be a day
of appreciation and understanding.
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Instead, Canada Appreciation Day
was mocked worldwide!
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Nobody takes us
Canadians seriously!
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It's like, the world doesn't
respect Canada at all, ey.
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That's right!
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And I think it's time for Canada
to show the world...
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just how bad things
would be without it!
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Together we can
send a message!
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It's time for
Canada... to strike!
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Did you say strike?
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Yes! Every Canadian join me!
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Join together!
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Canada on strike!
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Canada on strike.
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Canada, Canada.
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Canada, Canada.
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Canada on strike.
Canada says: "No more!"
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No more neglect,
we want respect.
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That's what we're striking for.
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All you bureaucrats and
corporate cats...
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can all just take a hike!
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It's Canada on strike.
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Canada on strike.
From Bagboua to St. John's
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We raise our middle fingers
for you all to sit upon.
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And with our fingers up your ass,
you won't be very cite.
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It's Canada on strike.
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And we will not bow or botch.
Our resolve is strong.
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We even took three hours
to rehearse this striking song.
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Canada on strike.
No matter where you are.
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If you are Canadian, then
you've got to do your part.
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March out of the halls.
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That's right. Suck my
Canadian balls.
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It's Canada on strike.
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It's Canada on strike.
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Uh-when you say Canada is on strike.
What exactly do you mean?
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What d'you think it means!?
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We're striking, buddy.
No more, that's it!
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Until we get what we want.
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Who exactly are you
to authorize this strike?
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I am Steven Aboutmen.
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Leader of the WGA.
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The WGA?
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Yes! The World Canadian Bureau.
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What exactly does Canada want?
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We want more money.
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Yeah. More money!
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More money from where?
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Just more money.
You know.
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Canada doesn't get
enough money.
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Other countries
have lots of money.
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We want-we want
some of that money.
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Ho-How about the internet?
Internet makes lots of money.
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So give us some of that money!
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Yeah! Give us
internet money.
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Mr. Aboutmen, you seem to...
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not understand how global
economics works. I think...
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Don't give me that fat cat
fancy lipwiggling.
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Are you gonna give
Canada more money, or not?
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I'm afraid we can't.
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Then you leave
Canada no choice.
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The strike shall continue!
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"Honk if you support Canada"
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Hey-hey, honey watch this.
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Oh, we're supporting unions.
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That's right. We're a
very progressive couple.
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Yes!
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Oh, that's fun!
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Well, we've done our good
deed for the week.
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I think now I can make love to
your anus without making God angry.
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Oh, really? Goodie!
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Guys. I'm really worried
about my brother.
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We don't care.
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You should care. This strike
effects everybody, fatass.
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Ssht, i-it's on.
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Yippee!
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It's the Terrance and Phillip show.
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Today's episode: 'I Fart Huckabees'.
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Ooh, this one again?
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God, they've replayed this
one like eighty times now.
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Say, Philip, I just bought
this new hybrid car.
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Oh? Does it run on electricity?
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No, it uses natural gas.
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I just fart at your face.
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Huh, it somehow loses it's
punch after multiple viewings.
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Goddamned, when are they gonna
air new Terrance and Phillip-shows?
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There aren't goin' to be
no shows. Don't you get it?
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Terrance and Phillip are Canadian.
We have to get Canada to end this strike.
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It's not a big deal. We can
just watch American comedy.
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You think that's bad?
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Remember the time I sang
La Cuca Rancha...
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for Paul McCartney?
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No! Nooo!
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We are not resorting to that.
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We want more!
We want more!
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One, two, three, four.
Canada deserves more... money.
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One, two, three, four.
Canada deserves more... money.
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Look, buddy. Me and Phillip
need to go home for a bit.
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Go home? You can't
leave the picket line.
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But this is taking too long.
And Phillip is diabetic.
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Look, guys. We have to stay strong.
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If you don't stand with
your fellow Canadians...
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then you are rats!
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Don't call me a rat, buddy.
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I'm not your buddy, friend.
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He's not your friend, guy.
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I'm not your guy, buddy.
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He's not your buddy, friend.
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I'm not your friend, guy.
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Don't you two understand anything?
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You think striking is a joke?
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You think it's something to ridicule?
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Yeah, you think this is funny?
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Don't you see that we have to stand
together or else we have nothing?
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Steven, Steven! A call came
in from the United States.
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They want to talk to you
about ending the strike.
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What did I tell you? I told you we'd
get to them sooner or later.
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All right. Ssh, ssh.
Quiet everyone.
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Let me handle this.
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Yes? This is Steven Aboutmen,
head of the WGA.
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Uh, hi. We want you
to end the strike.
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Oh, you do, huh?
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They've had enough.
They want us to end the strike!
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All right. Quiet, quiet. Ssh, ssh.
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Quiet, quiet. Let me deal with this.
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All right, we're prepared
to end the strike.
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If you are agreeing that
we should have more money.
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We totally think you
should have more money.
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We got 'em!
We did it!
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All right. How much
you gonna give us?
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Huh? Well, we don't really
have that much money.
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Oh. Negotiating
hard ball, are we?
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What about all that
internet money?
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The internet?
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You listen to me, friend!
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You'd better figure out a way
to get us our fair amount of money.
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And until you come back
with a solid, fair number...
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I'm finished talking to you,
you slimey corporate dickhead!
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Don't worry. Don't worry.
This is how negotiating works.
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This is good. We've
got 'em by the balls.
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What'd they say?
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They said we have to give them
money that we make on the internet.
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How are we supposed to
make money on the internet?
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Well. How do other people
make money on the internet?
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We have to put something
up on the internet...
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that everyone would
find fascinating.
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Wait. I've got it.
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I said what, what
in the butt.
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I said what, what
in the butt.
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I said what, what
in the butt.
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I said what, what
in the butt.
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You want to do
it in my butt?
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In my butt?
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00:09:03,734 --> 00:09:04,958
You want to do
it in my butt?
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In my butt?
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You want to do
it in my butt.
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In my butt.
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Let's do it
in the butt. Okay.
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It's okay. If you
have a little fint.
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Don't you worry.
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I won't bite.
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Not that hard.
If you want it.
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I'll give you power.
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Just be gentle.
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I'm gonna get
like a flower.
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Give it to me.
In the butt.
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Give it to me.
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Oh my!
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What, what, in the butt.
I said what, what. In the butt.
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I said what, what.
In the butt.
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You want to do it
in my butt?
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In my butt?
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00:09:39,806 --> 00:09:40,891
You want to do
it in my butt?
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00:09:40,892 --> 00:09:41,707
In my butt?
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00:09:41,875 --> 00:09:42,880
You want to do
it in my butt?
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In my butt?
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Let's do it
in the butt. Okay.
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There's more
people viewing it!
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This is going great!
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Don't worry, Ike!
The strike will be over soon!
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And in other world news:
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00:10:06,298 --> 00:10:11,015
The leader of Japan today, is calling
for an increase in military spending.
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00:10:11,295 --> 00:10:13,136
How come they haven't
mentioned anything about us?
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When are they gonna
get to the strike?
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00:10:14,824 --> 00:10:16,527
Don't worry.
The strike is big news.
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00:10:16,730 --> 00:10:18,507
I'm sure it will be
one of the top stories.
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00:10:18,508 --> 00:10:19,652
In other news tonight:
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00:10:19,653 --> 00:10:23,839
It's the internet video that has
already seen over ten million views.
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00:10:24,099 --> 00:10:27,475
A young confused looking boy,
dancing and singing a song called...
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00:10:27,476 --> 00:10:29,887
'What, what, in my asshole'.
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00:10:30,340 --> 00:10:31,582
Tom, in just one week...
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00:10:31,583 --> 00:10:34,404
the video has become the most
watched thing in all of America.
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00:10:34,718 --> 00:10:38,730
The boy in the video, referred to
by most as 'that little gay kid'...
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00:10:38,999 --> 00:10:42,594
has already been asked to appear
on Jimmy Kimmel and The Today Show.
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00:10:43,912 --> 00:10:45,701
Goddamned, that's not news!
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00:10:45,963 --> 00:10:47,065
What about us?
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00:10:47,527 --> 00:10:48,711
Look, uh, Steven.
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Terrance and I
were talking and...
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00:10:50,705 --> 00:10:54,334
Well it's- it's started to look like maybe
we're not gonna win this thing, y'know.
219
00:10:54,962 --> 00:10:57,373
We'll win! We'll just
have to stay resilient!
220
00:10:57,587 --> 00:11:00,436
Well, yeah. But everyone
is dying of starvation.
221
00:11:00,674 --> 00:11:02,010
Yeah. Let's give it up, guy.
222
00:11:02,123 --> 00:11:05,199
Don't call me your guy.
I'm not your guy, friend!
223
00:11:05,500 --> 00:11:07,116
Well, I'm not your friend, buddy!
224
00:11:07,117 --> 00:11:09,078
I'm not your buddy, guy!
225
00:11:09,334 --> 00:11:11,490
Wait, here it is.
Turn it up! We're on!
226
00:11:12,300 --> 00:11:13,165
And finally tonight.
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00:11:13,166 --> 00:11:15,584
A new development
in the Canada strike.
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00:11:16,008 --> 00:11:18,148
For those of you who
don't remember or don't care...
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00:11:18,149 --> 00:11:20,183
Canada has been
striking for more money.
230
00:11:20,441 --> 00:11:21,417
Yeah! All right!
231
00:11:25,914 --> 00:11:27,466
In a shocking turn of events...
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00:11:27,467 --> 00:11:30,242
it now appears that thousands
of people from Denmark...
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00:11:30,243 --> 00:11:33,712
are fledding into the United States
with hopes of taking the place...
234
00:11:33,747 --> 00:11:35,019
of the striking Canadians.
235
00:11:36,181 --> 00:11:36,886
What?
236
00:11:37,170 --> 00:11:39,809
D'you really think you Danish
can replace the Canadians?
237
00:11:40,322 --> 00:11:43,014
Well, where we come from
it's pretty cold too, ya.
238
00:11:43,346 --> 00:11:46,529
We like hockey and nobody really
pays any attention to us.
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00:11:46,530 --> 00:11:48,122
Nobody knows
where Denmark is.
240
00:11:48,210 --> 00:11:51,725
Right. So when you think about it,
we're the Canadians of Europe.
241
00:11:52,759 --> 00:11:54,661
Scums. How could you?
242
00:12:01,105 --> 00:12:03,545
Uh, hi. We made a really
succesful thing on the internet.
243
00:12:03,546 --> 00:12:04,799
And we'd like to collect our money.
244
00:12:05,340 --> 00:12:07,446
Take a number and wait
with everyone else.
245
00:12:08,189 --> 00:12:09,555
Ma'am, perhaps
you don't recognize...
246
00:12:09,556 --> 00:12:11,890
the internet-sensation
little gay kid from YouToob.
247
00:12:12,053 --> 00:12:14,656
Take a number and wait
with everyone else!
248
00:12:23,284 --> 00:12:25,809
Chocolate rain.
249
00:12:26,956 --> 00:12:27,857
Hey, I know you.
250
00:12:28,025 --> 00:12:29,658
You're the 'What-what my asshole'-kid.
251
00:12:30,002 --> 00:12:31,211
What-what in the butt, sir.
252
00:12:31,523 --> 00:12:33,493
This Tron-guy. I saw
him on YouToob.
253
00:12:33,817 --> 00:12:36,367
Yeah, sure. All the biggest
internet stars are here.
254
00:12:36,590 --> 00:12:38,357
You remember
off course Numa Numa.
255
00:12:46,319 --> 00:12:47,699
And the "Star Wars Kid".
256
00:12:51,280 --> 00:12:53,994
And the internet-sensation
"Cute Sneezing Panda".
257
00:12:56,651 --> 00:12:58,569
And there's "Dramatic Look Gopher".
258
00:13:03,274 --> 00:13:05,002
Wow, I've seen all you
guys on the internet.
259
00:13:05,297 --> 00:13:09,166
So, how many people have
seen your internet video?
260
00:13:09,529 --> 00:13:11,095
Uh, a few hundred thousand.
261
00:13:11,559 --> 00:13:13,896
Hah, mere peanuts.
262
00:13:14,007 --> 00:13:16,858
"Chocolate Rain" has
done gang busters.
263
00:13:17,010 --> 00:13:19,686
Theoretically, I'm a millionaire.
264
00:13:19,890 --> 00:13:22,394
Dude, screw you. Your
internet thing is so last year.
265
00:13:22,767 --> 00:13:25,250
Leave "Chocolate Rain"-guy alone!
266
00:13:25,599 --> 00:13:27,589
Leave him alone!
267
00:13:27,758 --> 00:13:29,065
I'm serious!
268
00:13:31,779 --> 00:13:32,525
Excuse me.
269
00:13:34,829 --> 00:13:35,450
Hello?
270
00:13:36,662 --> 00:13:38,700
You greedy, corporate fatcat.
271
00:13:38,701 --> 00:13:40,239
You said you would
get us money.
272
00:13:41,086 --> 00:13:42,169
We're working on it.
273
00:13:42,473 --> 00:13:44,913
You're stalling.
Because you think I'll give up.
274
00:13:45,117 --> 00:13:48,286
You know that most Canadians are
talking about giving up the strike already.
275
00:13:49,532 --> 00:13:51,110
You've got me over
the barrel and you know it.
276
00:13:51,510 --> 00:13:53,334
Sir, we're doing
everything we can.
277
00:13:53,486 --> 00:13:54,651
You want me to
say it again?
278
00:13:55,034 --> 00:13:56,122
You've got me
over a barrel.
279
00:13:56,414 --> 00:13:57,105
Now you happy?
280
00:13:57,485 --> 00:13:59,946
You've got me butt over a barrel
with my tender ass just waiting...
281
00:13:59,947 --> 00:14:02,018
to be pulverized by you
threshing manhood.
282
00:14:04,152 --> 00:14:07,227
Do you realize how stupid I'm
going to look if I call off the strike...
283
00:14:07,228 --> 00:14:08,326
after starting all this?
284
00:14:08,781 --> 00:14:10,302
I won't do it!
You hear me, guy!?
285
00:14:10,669 --> 00:14:14,176
You're wrong! No matter what happens
I will never call off this strike.
286
00:14:14,817 --> 00:14:17,216
Even if it means
we all die.
287
00:14:17,734 --> 00:14:19,211
We don't want you to die.
288
00:14:19,606 --> 00:14:20,824
Then you'd better hurry.
289
00:14:21,373 --> 00:14:22,660
We don't have much longer.
290
00:14:23,294 --> 00:14:24,804
The blood will be on your hands.
291
00:14:30,893 --> 00:14:32,133
We have to speed this up.
292
00:14:32,233 --> 00:14:34,437
Can we collect our internet
money in front of you, please?
293
00:14:34,588 --> 00:14:36,102
I don't think so.
294
00:14:36,282 --> 00:14:39,972
Nothing takes priority
over Chocolate Rain.
295
00:14:40,113 --> 00:14:42,079
Oh, here he goes
with the ego again.
296
00:14:42,080 --> 00:14:44,329
Who crowned you
the top internet-star?
297
00:14:44,689 --> 00:14:45,685
I did.
298
00:14:45,927 --> 00:14:49,061
When I became bigger
than all you bitches.
299
00:14:49,675 --> 00:14:53,146
Oh, please. "Laughing Baby" had
four times as many views as you.
300
00:14:57,463 --> 00:15:00,444
You'd better shut your
fucking mouth, laughing baby.
301
00:15:00,755 --> 00:15:02,505
Did you all forget
about "Afro-ninja"?
302
00:15:02,647 --> 00:15:04,575
My internet thing was
bigger than anybody's.
303
00:15:04,784 --> 00:15:07,456
I made over a hundred
million theoretical dollars.
304
00:15:07,716 --> 00:15:10,562
Well, Sneezing Panda's
theoretically worth billions.
305
00:15:10,991 --> 00:15:13,312
You all wanna motherfucking die?
306
00:15:13,842 --> 00:15:14,313
Noo!
307
00:15:29,235 --> 00:15:31,092
Hey, forget it!
We'll wait our turn.
308
00:15:39,585 --> 00:15:41,955
Leave Tron-guy alone!
309
00:15:42,254 --> 00:15:43,830
Leave him alone!
310
00:15:46,638 --> 00:15:49,545
Get ready for some
chocolate pain, bitch.
311
00:15:53,642 --> 00:15:55,586
Leave the panda alone!
312
00:15:55,729 --> 00:15:58,032
Leave her alone!
I'm serious!
313
00:16:09,378 --> 00:16:11,800
Thought I forgot
about you, gopher?
314
00:16:19,236 --> 00:16:21,487
Uuh, my brains.
315
00:16:28,945 --> 00:16:31,155
Sweet. I think we're
next in line now.
316
00:16:50,510 --> 00:16:53,388
Steven, Steven! They're here.
They've come to negotiate.
317
00:16:53,862 --> 00:16:55,297
What? You mean it?
318
00:16:56,348 --> 00:16:57,455
Okay, we get it.
319
00:16:58,339 --> 00:16:59,372
Who the hell are you?
320
00:16:59,531 --> 00:17:01,469
We're the ones you told
to go get internet money.
321
00:17:01,470 --> 00:17:03,908
Here. We made
ten million theoretical dollars.
322
00:17:03,943 --> 00:17:04,747
It's all for you.
323
00:17:07,405 --> 00:17:09,965
Theoretical dollars? What am
I supposed to do with that?
324
00:17:10,134 --> 00:17:11,669
You little timewasters!
325
00:17:11,990 --> 00:17:13,949
Hey, we worked really hard
to get this theoretical money.
326
00:17:14,073 --> 00:17:16,146
Yeah. Everyone thinks
I'm a homo now.
327
00:17:17,000 --> 00:17:18,129
You are a homo, Butters.
328
00:17:18,343 --> 00:17:19,745
Dude, will you just
end this thing now?
329
00:17:19,951 --> 00:17:21,335
My little brother is gonna die.
330
00:17:21,603 --> 00:17:24,091
Noo! I'm not gonna
look like an idiot!
331
00:17:24,247 --> 00:17:26,147
If I fucked up and led
everyone astray...
332
00:17:26,148 --> 00:17:27,814
the last thing I'm
gonna do is admit it!
333
00:17:30,135 --> 00:17:31,864
Yes, this is the head of the WGA.
334
00:17:32,363 --> 00:17:33,886
The World Canadian Bureau.
335
00:17:35,537 --> 00:17:36,637
Oh, Mr. Aboutmen.
336
00:17:36,795 --> 00:17:38,672
Global Vert. Summit Leaders.
337
00:17:38,852 --> 00:17:40,641
We want to talk to
you about the strike.
338
00:17:41,251 --> 00:17:42,524
You-You do?
339
00:17:43,073 --> 00:17:44,244
You wanna negotiate?
340
00:17:44,699 --> 00:17:47,098
No. Actually, we were
just wondering if...
341
00:17:47,099 --> 00:17:50,865
when you're all dead, we can use New-
foundland for a new global theme park.
342
00:17:58,811 --> 00:18:01,203
Hello? Would you just give
this guy something, please?
343
00:18:01,906 --> 00:18:02,915
Excuse me?
344
00:18:03,045 --> 00:18:04,550
He just doesn't want
to look like an idiot.
345
00:18:04,551 --> 00:18:06,328
So he needs everyone to think
the strike was for something.
346
00:18:06,788 --> 00:18:08,205
Jus-Just give him anything.
347
00:18:09,085 --> 00:18:13,881
Well. We could give Canada
some small consolation price.
348
00:18:14,669 --> 00:18:16,988
If they give you something
small, will you end the strike?
349
00:18:18,725 --> 00:18:21,681
Will they act like they're
giving Canada a lot...
350
00:18:21,682 --> 00:18:23,354
so everyone thinks
I did a good job?
351
00:18:23,592 --> 00:18:25,099
Can you act like
you're giving him a lot?
352
00:18:26,288 --> 00:18:27,312
Sure, why not?
353
00:18:31,297 --> 00:18:32,647
We have won!
354
00:18:36,634 --> 00:18:38,025
So how much did we get?
355
00:18:38,508 --> 00:18:39,026
Well we-uh...
356
00:18:39,726 --> 00:18:41,682
We didn't get everything
that we wanted, but...
357
00:18:42,320 --> 00:18:43,848
We negotiated hard and....
358
00:18:43,849 --> 00:18:46,941
We got these coupons
to Bennigans.
359
00:18:47,482 --> 00:18:50,807
And three bubble gums
for every Canadian!
360
00:18:57,046 --> 00:19:01,437
These coupons entitle every Canadian
to a free meal at Bennigans.
361
00:19:01,779 --> 00:19:04,532
With the potence of a meal
at equal or greater value off course.
362
00:19:05,545 --> 00:19:06,451
We did it!
363
00:19:11,993 --> 00:19:16,714
My friends. This is the greatest
victory in Canadian history.
364
00:19:32,317 --> 00:19:33,056
Ike.
365
00:19:33,546 --> 00:19:34,453
Ike!
366
00:19:35,634 --> 00:19:36,485
It's over.
367
00:19:36,559 --> 00:19:37,506
It's over?
368
00:19:37,507 --> 00:19:38,566
Yeah. Here you go.
369
00:19:46,211 --> 00:19:48,008
Boy, I'm sure glad
that's over with.
370
00:19:48,371 --> 00:19:49,384
Me too!
371
00:19:49,385 --> 00:19:51,549
Yeah, but you know?
I learned something today.
372
00:19:52,116 --> 00:19:53,823
We thought we could
make money on the internet.
373
00:19:53,901 --> 00:19:57,324
But, while the internet is new
and exciting for creative people.
374
00:19:57,404 --> 00:19:59,881
It hasn't matured as a distribution
mechanism to the extent...
375
00:19:59,882 --> 00:20:02,128
what you trade real and immediate
opportunities for income...
376
00:20:02,129 --> 00:20:03,841
for the promise of
future online revenue.
377
00:20:03,842 --> 00:20:06,001
It will be a few years
before digital distribution...
378
00:20:06,002 --> 00:20:07,375
of media on the internet
can be monetized...
379
00:20:07,385 --> 00:20:09,280
to an extent that necessitates
contract producers...
380
00:20:09,281 --> 00:20:11,737
to forego their fair value
and more traditional media.
381
00:20:13,426 --> 00:20:14,329
Yeah.
382
00:20:25,619 --> 00:20:26,711
Yeah! We did it!
383
00:20:26,790 --> 00:20:27,851
Celebrate, everyone!
384
00:20:34,208 --> 00:20:36,525
Hold on a minute!
Wait just a second!
385
00:20:37,401 --> 00:20:38,772
We just did some calculating.
386
00:20:39,099 --> 00:20:43,252
By not working during the strike,
Canadians lost 10.4 million dollars.
387
00:20:43,370 --> 00:20:48,398
And our Bennigans coupons and
bubblegum is worth roughly... 3.008 dollars.
388
00:20:48,963 --> 00:20:50,936
Don't look at that.
Come on, friends. Let's dance!
389
00:20:52,266 --> 00:20:53,555
You had no idea what
you were doing....
390
00:20:53,556 --> 00:20:55,069
and now you're trying to
make it look like you won...
391
00:20:55,070 --> 00:20:56,627
so that we won't send you adrift.
392
00:20:56,742 --> 00:20:58,184
Damn it, friends. Don't you see?
393
00:20:58,489 --> 00:21:00,953
We won for future
Canadians, guy.
394
00:21:00,928 --> 00:21:03,313
So the little guy doesn't
get pushed around any more.
395
00:21:03,736 --> 00:21:05,995
This is a victory for
Canada's respect.
396
00:21:12,239 --> 00:21:14,078
Ey! What do you
think you're doing?
397
00:21:14,166 --> 00:21:15,664
We're sending
you adrift, idiot.
398
00:21:17,384 --> 00:21:19,054
Maybe you can go
live with the Danish!
399
00:21:19,640 --> 00:21:21,965
You'll regret this day, friend!
400
00:21:23,109 --> 00:21:24,651
I'm not your friend, buddy!
401
00:21:25,863 --> 00:21:27,913
I'm not your buddy, guy!
402
00:21:28,270 --> 00:21:30,150
He's not your guy, friend!
403
00:21:30,430 --> 00:21:33,519
I'm not your friend, buddy!
404
00:21:33,867 --> 00:21:36,084
We're not your buddies, guy!
405
00:21:36,374 --> 00:21:40,694
I'm not your guy, friend!