1 00:00:03,301 --> 00:00:06,772 ♪ I'm goin' down to South Park, ♪ ♪ gonna have myself a time. ♪ 2 00:00:06,773 --> 00:00:10,040 ♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪ ♪ humble folks without temptation. ♪ 3 00:00:10,041 --> 00:00:13,271 ♪ I'm goin' down to South Park, ♪ ♪ gonna leave my woes behind. ♪ 4 00:00:13,316 --> 00:00:16,597 ♪ Ample parking day or night, ♪ ♪ people spouting, "Howdy, neighbor". ♪ 5 00:00:16,644 --> 00:00:19,765 ♪ I'm headin' down to South Park, ♪ ♪ gonna see if I can't unwind. ♪ 6 00:00:19,779 --> 00:00:21,652 ♪ Murpph mmmph mmph ♪ ♪ mmmph mrrr mff mrmmph! ♪ 7 00:00:21,653 --> 00:00:23,362 ♪ Murpph mmmph ♪ ♪ mmph mmph mrrr mff mrmmph! ♪ 8 00:00:23,363 --> 00:00:26,749 ♪ So come on down to South Park, ♪ ♪ and meet some friends of mine. ♪ 9 00:00:26,803 --> 00:00:29,803 Synced by Reef www.addic7ed.com 10 00:00:29,889 --> 00:00:32,744 Yeah, yeah, do we rock, yeah, yeah, take it to the top. 11 00:00:32,769 --> 00:00:35,570 Yeah, yeah, are we gonna stop, no way, no way. 12 00:00:35,595 --> 00:00:37,204 Cheer squad roar call! 13 00:00:37,229 --> 00:00:39,229 Heidi! Nicole! Bebe. 14 00:00:39,230 --> 00:00:41,531 Lala. Fred. Annie. 15 00:00:42,014 --> 00:00:44,138 Lisa Burger. 16 00:00:44,139 --> 00:00:45,978 - Oh, God. - Here we go. 17 00:00:45,979 --> 00:00:48,405 Could we maybe try one without Lisa Berger? 18 00:00:48,406 --> 00:00:50,035 You guys, stop it. 19 00:00:50,175 --> 00:00:53,866 Okay, Lisa, that's great but you need to have more confidence, okay? 20 00:00:53,872 --> 00:00:56,359 - But I'm the fat one. - What? 21 00:00:56,360 --> 00:00:59,755 Every cheerleading squad has the fat ugly cheerleader and that's me. 22 00:00:59,799 --> 00:01:02,664 See, that's the problem, Lisa. You have a bad self image. 23 00:01:02,665 --> 00:01:06,036 Just project all your sassiness to all the boys out there, okay? 24 00:01:06,037 --> 00:01:08,606 There's only one boy that Lisa cares about. 25 00:01:08,607 --> 00:01:12,037 - Yeah, Lisa has a crush on Butters. - Shut up. 26 00:01:12,038 --> 00:01:14,953 But Lisa, that's great! Have you told Butters that you like him? 27 00:01:14,954 --> 00:01:17,397 No way. I'd just get made fun of. 28 00:01:17,398 --> 00:01:21,914 Lisa, this is exactly what you need. Take Butters to see a movie or something. 29 00:01:21,915 --> 00:01:23,982 It'll do wonders for your confidence. 30 00:01:25,189 --> 00:01:28,004 So then the family with the mustache saw the cupcakes 31 00:01:28,005 --> 00:01:30,716 then lady takes out a gun and puts it in his face and she says... 32 00:01:30,717 --> 00:01:32,377 Excuse me, Butters. 33 00:01:33,306 --> 00:01:34,658 Oh, yes? 34 00:01:34,688 --> 00:01:41,386 Uh, well, I was just wondering if maybe you'd like to go to a movie this weekend. 35 00:01:42,066 --> 00:01:44,745 Oh, like a date? No thanks, Lisa. 36 00:01:44,746 --> 00:01:47,330 I really appreciate the offer but you're too fat for me. 37 00:01:48,098 --> 00:01:49,889 Okay. Thanks. 38 00:01:50,104 --> 00:01:51,854 See you, Lisa! 39 00:01:51,855 --> 00:01:54,182 Ha-ha, Butters got asked out by a fat girl. 40 00:01:54,183 --> 00:01:55,935 At least she didn't try to sit on him. 41 00:01:56,848 --> 00:01:59,072 You guys, come on. That's not cute. 42 00:01:59,098 --> 00:02:01,213 You shouldn't rip on her because she's fat. 43 00:02:01,214 --> 00:02:03,283 You should rip on her because she's ugly, okay? 44 00:02:03,284 --> 00:02:05,479 She looks like someone hit her in the face with a hot shovel 45 00:02:05,480 --> 00:02:07,336 and that's why she sucks, alright? 46 00:02:07,596 --> 00:02:10,883 ♪ Camptown ladies sing this song, Doo-dah, Doo-dah... ♪ 47 00:02:10,909 --> 00:02:13,710 ♪ Camptown race-track five miles long, Oh, doo-dah day ♪ 48 00:02:13,711 --> 00:02:16,589 - What the BEEP is your problem? - Oh, hey, Wendy. 49 00:02:16,614 --> 00:02:18,614 Are you just an asshole? Is that it? 50 00:02:19,122 --> 00:02:21,138 - Am I just an asshole? - Yeah! 51 00:02:21,153 --> 00:02:23,689 Well, no, I've got arms and legs, I've got everything. 52 00:02:23,690 --> 00:02:26,058 Lisa Burger asked you out and you called her "fat"?! 53 00:02:26,059 --> 00:02:28,521 Do you have any idea how you made her feel? 54 00:02:28,546 --> 00:02:29,997 She's a really nice girl! 55 00:02:29,998 --> 00:02:32,969 I think she's a nice girl too. She's just too big for me. 56 00:02:32,970 --> 00:02:36,598 She's a little overweight, but that's pretty normal for a girl in fourth grade. 57 00:02:36,599 --> 00:02:39,190 Well Kim Kardashian is skinnee and she just had a baby. 58 00:02:39,191 --> 00:02:40,401 What?! 59 00:02:40,402 --> 00:02:43,983 I'm sorry, Wendy, but I have a different standard when it comes to my women. 60 00:02:44,008 --> 00:02:47,947 I want a woman who takes care of herself and knows how to look good, 61 00:02:47,948 --> 00:02:52,576 who's got perfect skin and no *** and perfect everything. 62 00:02:52,577 --> 00:02:56,607 This is a fantasy, you moron! You ever heard of Photoshop? 63 00:02:56,608 --> 00:03:00,167 Kim Kardashian is a short overweight woman who manipulates her image 64 00:03:00,168 --> 00:03:02,712 and makes average girls feel horrible about hemselves. 65 00:03:02,713 --> 00:03:05,277 - You're a liar! - Look it up, stupid! 66 00:03:05,285 --> 00:03:08,455 In real life, Kim Kardashian has the body of a hobbit. 67 00:03:09,681 --> 00:03:11,500 You're gonna be in real trouble 68 00:03:11,501 --> 00:03:14,535 when the teachers find out what you said to that poor girl. 69 00:03:18,914 --> 00:03:20,486 Uh, take a seat, Wendy. 70 00:03:20,487 --> 00:03:23,879 I guess some mean things were said and I need to get to the bottom of it. 71 00:03:24,325 --> 00:03:26,720 Oh, good, Lisa Burger told on you? Good. 72 00:03:26,765 --> 00:03:30,732 Uh, no, Wendy, apparently you called Butters' girlfriend a hobbit. 73 00:03:32,159 --> 00:03:33,584 Are you serious? 74 00:03:33,585 --> 00:03:37,126 You did! You said Kim is short, fat, with big hairy feet and she's a hobbit. 75 00:03:37,127 --> 00:03:40,151 That's not his girlfriend. It's Kim Kardashian! 76 00:03:40,152 --> 00:03:44,955 But, Wendy, Kim Kardashian is considered to be extremely beautiful. Okay? 77 00:03:44,956 --> 00:03:47,637 Right. But she's not in real life. She's a hobbit. 78 00:03:47,662 --> 00:03:49,199 Wow, she said it again! 79 00:03:49,200 --> 00:03:51,758 Now, Wendy, Kim might be full figured, 80 00:03:51,783 --> 00:03:54,869 but a woman's outward appearance isn't all that matters, okay? 81 00:03:54,894 --> 00:03:58,124 Have you stopped to consider that maybe, just maybe... 82 00:03:58,149 --> 00:03:59,622 You're jel? 83 00:04:01,350 --> 00:04:02,942 I'm not jel. 84 00:04:02,943 --> 00:04:05,508 And I happen to be the biggest feminist at this school. 85 00:04:05,509 --> 00:04:09,227 That may be true, but there's a very fine line, Wendy, 86 00:04:09,228 --> 00:04:12,627 between being a feminist and being a hater, emkay? 87 00:04:12,784 --> 00:04:17,170 And you're gonna have to find that line because nobody likes a girl who's jelly. 88 00:04:18,007 --> 00:04:21,368 Okay, kids, there's been some hurtful and hateful things 89 00:04:21,369 --> 00:04:23,203 being said around this school. 90 00:04:23,232 --> 00:04:25,817 And so, we're gonna hear from a guest speaker, 91 00:04:25,818 --> 00:04:30,154 here to explain why Kim Kardashian is not a hobbit. 92 00:04:30,155 --> 00:04:32,429 Please welcome Aquaman. 93 00:04:33,417 --> 00:04:36,393 - Uh-huh. Uh-huh, that's right. - Uh-oh. 94 00:04:36,395 --> 00:04:41,465 Okay, first of all, I'm not Aquaman. I'm a recovering gay fish. 95 00:04:41,676 --> 00:04:45,331 Yes, I have met Aquaman, I have hung out with Aquaman, 96 00:04:45,332 --> 00:04:50,091 but the only thing I have in common with Aquaman any more is my love for the sea. 97 00:04:50,651 --> 00:04:57,393 Now, there've been malicious rumors started at this elementary school 98 00:04:57,394 --> 00:05:01,147 that my beautiful fiancée is a hobbit. 99 00:05:01,889 --> 00:05:06,048 That is not funny. And it's not true, all right? 100 00:05:06,049 --> 00:05:09,359 Yes, Kim is heavier than most of her pictures show her to be. 101 00:05:09,360 --> 00:05:12,147 Yes, she gets her hair lasered off her body. 102 00:05:12,148 --> 00:05:16,242 Yes, she has a friend named Gandalf who happens to be a wizard. 103 00:05:17,835 --> 00:05:20,136 I'm sorry, excuse me a minute. 104 00:05:21,895 --> 00:05:24,562 Bitch, how you not the hobbit again? 105 00:05:25,548 --> 00:05:28,659 Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, right. Right, right, right, yeah, okay. 106 00:05:28,660 --> 00:05:32,368 Yup, okay. Let me.. Okay. Yep, I got it. Okay. Love you too. 107 00:05:33,586 --> 00:05:37,538 Okay. If my fiancée Kim is a hobbit, 108 00:05:37,539 --> 00:05:42,359 then how come... then, okay, if she's a hobbit 109 00:05:42,360 --> 00:05:45,575 then how come she don't live in a hole in the ground? 110 00:05:45,576 --> 00:05:50,229 Boom! All y'all just got lit up, cop! She don't live in no hole in no ground, 111 00:05:50,230 --> 00:05:52,342 she is lives in a big-ass mansion with me, 112 00:05:52,343 --> 00:05:54,777 in her room that is slightly below ground. 113 00:05:54,802 --> 00:05:56,663 So, you can... 114 00:05:57,204 --> 00:06:00,450 She-she is sexy and womanly and she smokes a pipe, 115 00:06:00,451 --> 00:06:03,378 she can blow them rings over her head and... 116 00:06:03,566 --> 00:06:05,279 Hold up. 117 00:06:07,264 --> 00:06:09,448 Bitch, you not a hobbit, right? 118 00:06:09,675 --> 00:06:13,498 No, I know, you just you smoke that long pipe sometimes when you sit by the fire. 119 00:06:13,813 --> 00:06:17,565 Oh, it's a... Oh, okay. Gottit, gottit. What do you call it? Yup. 120 00:06:17,567 --> 00:06:20,365 Yep. Got it. Okay. Yep. Love you too. 121 00:06:21,146 --> 00:06:24,225 That is not a hobbit pipe, for your information. 122 00:06:24,226 --> 00:06:26,741 It is a personal oral humidifier, 123 00:06:26,743 --> 00:06:28,934 to keep all the wrinkles around her mouth from showing. 124 00:06:28,935 --> 00:06:31,490 So ha ha, all you haters, ha! 125 00:06:34,793 --> 00:06:38,029 - Butters, Butters, come here for a sec. - Oh, no, you don't, Wendy. 126 00:06:38,030 --> 00:06:40,765 You're not trapping me inside the computer lab to beat me up. 127 00:06:40,766 --> 00:06:43,769 Butters, would you please let me show you something so we can put this behind us. 128 00:06:43,770 --> 00:06:46,669 Alright, but if you try to punch me, I'll scream. 129 00:06:48,089 --> 00:06:51,912 I want you to see just how easy this is, so we can better understand each other. 130 00:06:51,913 --> 00:06:53,967 This is Lisa Burger's class photo, right? 131 00:06:53,992 --> 00:06:55,075 Okay...? 132 00:06:55,076 --> 00:06:57,817 Now, first thing we do is just photoshop the bulges on the sides, 133 00:06:57,818 --> 00:07:01,137 we select the eyes, make them a nicer shape, take off any *** on her skin, 134 00:07:01,154 --> 00:07:04,392 lengthen the neck, add more to the hair, select the lips, make 'em fuller, 135 00:07:04,424 --> 00:07:07,592 take out any puffiness on her skin, here, add fullness to the breast, 136 00:07:07,593 --> 00:07:09,876 length to the torso, take away that fold of skin, 137 00:07:09,877 --> 00:07:13,699 streamline the shoulders, put highlights in the eyes and... there. 138 00:07:13,724 --> 00:07:17,497 - That's Lisa Burger?! - Do you see what I'm talking about? 139 00:07:17,637 --> 00:07:20,469 - She's pretty! - That's how people like Kim Kardashian 140 00:07:20,470 --> 00:07:22,807 destroy the self image of little girls everywhere. 141 00:07:22,809 --> 00:07:26,537 Hold up, are you saying that girl wants to go out with me? 142 00:07:26,538 --> 00:07:28,972 - What? What do you mean? - And I said no?! 143 00:07:28,997 --> 00:07:31,641 Oh, man, I got to upload this and then go buy her some flowers, 144 00:07:31,642 --> 00:07:34,179 - ...and then go tell her I love her. - Butters! 145 00:07:38,037 --> 00:07:41,588 Lisa? Lisa Burger? Anybody seen Lisa Burger? 146 00:07:41,661 --> 00:07:44,208 Oh, hi, Eric, have you seen Lisa Burger anywhere? 147 00:07:44,209 --> 00:07:46,124 I saw the picture of her you put on the Internet. 148 00:07:46,133 --> 00:07:47,870 I know. I'm gonna tell her I love her, 149 00:07:47,896 --> 00:07:50,121 and we're gonna be together and be happy forever. 150 00:07:50,688 --> 00:07:52,889 Uh, Butters, I don't know how to tell you this, but... 151 00:07:52,915 --> 00:07:56,795 - Lisa Burger's going out with Clyde. - What?! Since when? 152 00:07:56,796 --> 00:07:59,386 Dude, since like noon or 12:30 today. 153 00:08:06,707 --> 00:08:10,492 Hey, Token. Token, check out my girlfriend. 154 00:08:11,066 --> 00:08:14,993 - Wow, she's hot. - Yeah, we just started dating seriously. 155 00:08:15,240 --> 00:08:17,102 You want to be my new girlfriend, ***? 156 00:08:17,128 --> 00:08:20,102 - Oh, man, you're a lucky guy. - Yeah, I know. 157 00:08:20,526 --> 00:08:22,711 Hey, Clyde, nice score, dude. 158 00:08:22,712 --> 00:08:25,084 - Yeah! - Ha, thanks, guys. 159 00:08:27,128 --> 00:08:30,142 Hey, Stan, did you see Clyde's going out with Lisa Bu-Burger. 160 00:08:30,143 --> 00:08:32,671 Yeah, dude. She looks amazing. Clyde sent me her pics. 161 00:08:32,672 --> 00:08:36,939 - She got really hot all of a sudden. - Yeah, I wouldn't mind tapping that ass. 162 00:08:36,940 --> 00:08:38,242 Excuse me. 163 00:08:38,250 --> 00:08:40,827 Oh, hey, Wendy. Clyde sent me these, don't be jel. 164 00:08:40,828 --> 00:08:42,327 Why would I be jel? 165 00:08:42,328 --> 00:08:44,541 Well, you got to admit. Lisa Burger's pretty hot, Wendy. 166 00:08:44,566 --> 00:08:47,012 She's not hot. That's supposed to be the point. 167 00:08:47,013 --> 00:08:50,393 - She looks pretty hot here. - Lisa Burger is not hot! 168 00:08:50,394 --> 00:08:52,118 She's fat and ugly. 169 00:08:52,146 --> 00:08:55,570 - That's not very nice, Wendy. - What's your problem, Wendy? 170 00:08:56,433 --> 00:08:59,822 - I'm sorry. It's nothing personal, Lisa. - You're just a hater. 171 00:08:59,823 --> 00:09:02,642 Why don't you mind your own business instead is of being jelly. 172 00:09:02,647 --> 00:09:06,293 I am not jelly! I made that picture of you to prove a point. 173 00:09:06,294 --> 00:09:09,011 - And it's being taken the wrong way! - It's okay, babe. 174 00:09:09,012 --> 00:09:11,217 Girls that don't have what you have will always put you down. 175 00:09:11,218 --> 00:09:12,455 Thanks, babe. 176 00:09:12,456 --> 00:09:15,083 Now, Wendy, I've tried to be patient with you, 177 00:09:15,109 --> 00:09:17,655 because you've always been a good student, mkey? 178 00:09:17,657 --> 00:09:21,442 But calling a little girl fat and ugly is never mkay. 179 00:09:21,444 --> 00:09:23,365 Mr. Mackey, I was trying to show kids that... 180 00:09:23,366 --> 00:09:27,749 No, no excuses. You have a problem being jelly, Wendy. Mkey? 181 00:09:27,751 --> 00:09:30,697 Just maybe I should have you sent off to Jelly School. 182 00:09:30,698 --> 00:09:31,970 Jelly School...? 183 00:09:31,995 --> 00:09:35,412 That's right. In fact, I'm gonna call the Jelly School right now, mkay? 184 00:09:35,444 --> 00:09:38,238 I'm sorry about this, but it's gone too far. I've had it. 185 00:09:38,472 --> 00:09:40,295 Hello, is this the Jelly School? 186 00:09:40,296 --> 00:09:42,523 Mkay, I have a girl here who's extremely jelly. 187 00:09:42,549 --> 00:09:45,004 I was wondering if you can take her in for a few weeks. 188 00:09:45,217 --> 00:09:48,763 Mkay, you're full? Mkay, I guess she dodged the bullet this time 189 00:09:48,764 --> 00:09:50,874 but she better watch her jelly behavior 190 00:09:50,884 --> 00:09:54,315 Mr. Mackey, I appreciate the point you're trying to make. 191 00:09:54,340 --> 00:09:56,340 Y-you do...? 192 00:09:56,341 --> 00:10:00,867 Okay, well I'm not actually on the phone with the Jelly School, Wendy, mkay? 193 00:10:00,868 --> 00:10:04,003 Yes. I'm... I'm a few steps ahead of that, yes. 194 00:10:04,004 --> 00:10:07,789 Mkay, well, Wendy, I'm just tryin' to... ...Bye, Jelly School. 195 00:10:07,791 --> 00:10:10,187 Uh, Wendy, I'm just trying to make you understand 196 00:10:10,188 --> 00:10:12,810 how serious it is when you lash out at other girls, 197 00:10:12,835 --> 00:10:15,210 Thank you, Mr. Mackey. Yeah, I will... change. 198 00:10:15,211 --> 00:10:16,460 M... kay. 199 00:10:16,955 --> 00:10:20,087 ___ 200 00:10:20,308 --> 00:10:25,277 Ladies and gentlemen, it is my honor to give the Person of the Year award 201 00:10:25,278 --> 00:10:28,554 to this year's winner, Pope Francis. 202 00:10:36,733 --> 00:10:38,603 Gracias... Gracias... 203 00:10:38,604 --> 00:10:42,169 - All of my children... - Alright, hold up. 204 00:10:42,170 --> 00:10:44,281 Hold up. I'm sorry, Pope, but hold up. 205 00:10:44,306 --> 00:10:46,306 I just gotta say this. 206 00:10:46,363 --> 00:10:50,973 If my fiancée is a hobbit, then, um... 207 00:10:51,927 --> 00:10:53,630 Then what, bitch? 208 00:10:54,131 --> 00:10:59,305 Oh, yeah, yeah. Okay, if she was... if she is a hobbit, 209 00:10:59,306 --> 00:11:03,439 then how come she don't turn blue when goblins are near? 210 00:11:03,440 --> 00:11:07,294 Oh, you didn't think of that! Oh, I guess she's not a hobbit, then! 211 00:11:07,295 --> 00:11:09,872 She must be a beautiful sexy woman! 212 00:11:10,134 --> 00:11:15,392 The hobbit doesn't turn blue around goblins, just his sword does. 213 00:11:15,393 --> 00:11:19,550 Man, get the BEEP out of here, you hobbit trivia bitch. Who the BEEP asked you? 214 00:11:19,551 --> 00:11:23,233 Nobody is talking any more shit about my woman all right? 215 00:11:23,234 --> 00:11:24,903 She is gorgeous. 216 00:11:24,928 --> 00:11:28,240 If she was here you could all see for yourself how beautiful she is, 217 00:11:28,241 --> 00:11:32,045 but she can't be here, because she has a movie coming out on Friday, 218 00:11:32,046 --> 00:11:35,357 directed by Peter Jackson, called "The Hobbit". 219 00:11:35,613 --> 00:11:36,949 Hold up. 220 00:11:38,115 --> 00:11:41,020 Bitch, that movie you got coming out is called "The Hobbit"...? 221 00:11:41,861 --> 00:11:46,356 Yeah, but it... It's what? Oh, yeah, yup, yup. 222 00:11:46,357 --> 00:11:49,060 I got it. Yup. Let me tell them. Love you too. 223 00:11:49,602 --> 00:11:52,363 Kim is not even in that movie. 224 00:11:52,365 --> 00:11:55,388 That movie is just loosely based on her television show, 225 00:11:55,413 --> 00:11:57,112 "Keeping up with the Kardashians", 226 00:11:57,113 --> 00:12:02,853 which is a show about short loud little people living in a fantasy world. Hold up. 227 00:12:04,217 --> 00:12:06,813 Bitch, if you the hobbit, you need to let me know right now, 228 00:12:06,814 --> 00:12:09,276 'cause I'm making a fool of myself out here. 229 00:12:09,776 --> 00:12:13,038 Yeah, yeah, do we rock, yeah, yeah, take it to the top. 230 00:12:13,063 --> 00:12:15,835 Yeah, yeah, are we gonna stop, no way, no way. 231 00:12:15,860 --> 00:12:17,556 Cheer squad roar call! 232 00:12:17,557 --> 00:12:19,321 Heidi. Nicole. 233 00:12:19,322 --> 00:12:22,490 Bebe. Lala. Fred. Annie. 234 00:12:22,491 --> 00:12:25,831 Lisa Burger. 235 00:12:27,447 --> 00:12:29,811 And I'm your captain, Wendy. 236 00:12:41,883 --> 00:12:44,767 Look, Wendy we're all very happy for Lisa, okay? 237 00:12:44,769 --> 00:12:48,761 Nobody here is jelly but the boys don't even notice the rest of us any more. 238 00:12:48,762 --> 00:12:51,569 All we're asking is you do for us what you did for Lisa, 239 00:12:51,570 --> 00:12:53,039 and help with our imperfections. 240 00:12:53,040 --> 00:12:56,540 - I won't do you, guys. I'm sorry. - Why, don't you care about us? 241 00:12:56,541 --> 00:12:58,011 Because it's wrong. 242 00:12:58,057 --> 00:13:01,575 If you guys are unhappy with the way you look, then that's your problem. 243 00:13:02,750 --> 00:13:04,121 Hey, girls. 244 00:13:04,346 --> 00:13:07,875 Don't be sad. If you want to look really hot, like me, 245 00:13:07,876 --> 00:13:11,957 you just got to be willing to sweat. Get down to the gym and work. 246 00:13:17,687 --> 00:13:21,129 All right, girls we're gonna trim that fat and tone those bodies. 247 00:13:21,130 --> 00:13:23,130 Let's do this. You first. 248 00:13:24,208 --> 00:13:26,186 Get right up there. 249 00:13:26,317 --> 00:13:28,210 All right, now look here. 250 00:13:30,981 --> 00:13:34,189 Come on, burn it off. You got this. 251 00:13:54,215 --> 00:13:57,069 Look at those thighs... Come on, you gotta push harder! 252 00:14:05,263 --> 00:14:07,569 ♪ You better work out, whore! ♪ 253 00:14:10,262 --> 00:14:12,584 Whoa... She looks sweet. 254 00:14:12,585 --> 00:14:16,123 Whoa, look at Bebe. I had no idea Bebe was that hot. 255 00:14:16,124 --> 00:14:18,318 Yeah, but did you see Token's girlfriend? 256 00:14:20,705 --> 00:14:22,872 Um, my bitch is still the hottest, you guys. 257 00:14:22,874 --> 00:14:26,089 No way, go back to Annie Nelson. She's built like a slim-Jim. 258 00:14:26,090 --> 00:14:29,728 Yeah, clearly Annie Nelson is the hottest girl at our school. Look at those eyes! 259 00:14:29,729 --> 00:14:33,606 Did you not see Erica Smith's boobs, Cal? They're like perfect water balloons. 260 00:14:33,631 --> 00:14:35,490 I do love water balloons. 261 00:14:40,995 --> 00:14:44,101 - Hey, Wendy, can I ask you a big favor? - What? 262 00:14:44,102 --> 00:14:47,645 A lot of the pictures I have of you are kinda outdated and I... 263 00:14:47,646 --> 00:14:49,507 You know, I wanna be able to show everyone how pretty you are. 264 00:14:49,508 --> 00:14:50,909 So you want me to photoshop-picture me 265 00:14:50,910 --> 00:14:52,528 to take away any imperfections, is that it? 266 00:14:52,553 --> 00:14:55,671 - How dare you, Stan? - Wendy, why is it such a big deal? 267 00:14:55,672 --> 00:14:58,203 Because people should be okay with the way they look! 268 00:14:58,204 --> 00:15:02,036 I have pimples on my forehead. My bottom teeth are crooked. So what?! 269 00:15:02,037 --> 00:15:04,339 - You have short legs. - I do? 270 00:15:04,340 --> 00:15:07,809 Yeah, and Jason has freckles, and Billy Turner has narrow shoulders. 271 00:15:07,834 --> 00:15:10,613 The chearleaders? Bebe has acne, Lala's arms are too short, 272 00:15:10,638 --> 00:15:12,928 Nicole's eyes are puffy, Annie has thin hair, 273 00:15:12,953 --> 00:15:15,686 and Heidi Turner's butt is flat! 274 00:15:17,589 --> 00:15:21,448 - Oh, God dammit. - You... hater! 275 00:15:21,449 --> 00:15:25,407 Wendy, in my office, right now, mkay? 276 00:15:29,442 --> 00:15:32,687 ♪ One thing I know, ♪ ♪ My girl ain't no hobbit. ♪ 277 00:15:32,688 --> 00:15:35,381 ♪ She might be stumpy, ♪ ♪ that don't mean she a hobbit... ♪ 278 00:15:35,383 --> 00:15:38,115 ♪ She's not a hobbit, ♪ ♪ because she couldn't be. ♪ 279 00:15:38,562 --> 00:15:41,425 ♪ She's got no Bagginses ♪ ♪ in her family tree. ♪ 280 00:15:41,426 --> 00:15:44,699 ♪ On occasion she hangs out ♪ ♪ with dwarf friends. ♪ 281 00:15:44,700 --> 00:15:47,875 ♪ But she never went on a quest ♪ ♪ with her dwarf friend. ♪ 282 00:15:47,876 --> 00:15:50,628 ♪ Except for one time, ♪ ♪ she went to kill that dragon ♪ 283 00:15:50,653 --> 00:15:52,468 ♪ She took his skull and... ♪ 284 00:15:52,469 --> 00:15:55,805 Hang on a minute, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 285 00:15:57,629 --> 00:16:00,972 Bitch, remember when you out to kill that dragon with them dwarves...? 286 00:16:01,341 --> 00:16:03,002 Yeah. Oh, yeah. 287 00:16:03,003 --> 00:16:06,184 Right, right, right. Yup, I got it. Yup. Love you too. 288 00:16:06,653 --> 00:16:10,108 ♪ It wasn't no dragon, ♪ ♪ so my girl ain't no hobbit, ♪ 289 00:16:10,109 --> 00:16:13,175 ♪ That was at Quiznos ♪ ♪ and my bitch went to rob it, ♪ 290 00:16:13,176 --> 00:16:16,305 ♪ 'Cause they got the hap ♪ ♪ that she rubs on her cellulite, ♪ 291 00:16:16,306 --> 00:16:19,775 ♪ While she drinkin' her grog ♪ ♪ and singin' those merry songs... ♪ 292 00:16:19,776 --> 00:16:21,105 ♪ At night... ♪ 293 00:16:21,131 --> 00:16:26,285 ♪ My girl ain't no hobbit. Please, God, ♪ ♪ tell me I ain't engaged to no hobbit ♪ 294 00:16:30,167 --> 00:16:32,811 ♪ Who are you yelling for? ♪ ♪ South Park. ♪ 295 00:16:32,813 --> 00:16:36,377 ♪ Let's go, cows. Who are you ♪ ♪ yelling for? South Park. ♪ 296 00:16:36,402 --> 00:16:37,508 Let's go, cows. 297 00:16:37,509 --> 00:16:39,092 Heidi! Nicole! Bebe. 298 00:16:39,117 --> 00:16:40,678 Lala. Fred. Annie. 299 00:16:40,679 --> 00:16:42,480 Lisa Burger. 300 00:16:42,844 --> 00:16:44,096 Wendy. 301 00:16:44,121 --> 00:16:46,360 - Oh, she sucks! - Oh, God...! 302 00:16:46,361 --> 00:16:48,954 - Can we try this without Wendy? - I agree. 303 00:16:48,955 --> 00:16:52,223 Hey, come on, you guys. She just needs more confidence. 304 00:16:52,308 --> 00:16:53,756 It's okay, Wendy. 305 00:16:53,757 --> 00:16:57,762 Who cares if no one likes you. Maybe you should go out with Butters. 306 00:16:58,032 --> 00:17:00,306 Let's just get back to cheering, okay? 307 00:17:00,331 --> 00:17:03,131 I don't think so. We don't wanna cheer with a hater! 308 00:17:03,144 --> 00:17:05,719 Yeah, you have a bad self image, Wendy. 309 00:17:05,744 --> 00:17:08,115 You need to get down to the gym and get a better one. 310 00:17:08,116 --> 00:17:09,643 Yeah, that's right! 311 00:17:09,669 --> 00:17:12,863 See, the problem with having fake pictures of yourself, 312 00:17:12,889 --> 00:17:16,177 is that you start to believe in your own bullshit! 313 00:17:16,178 --> 00:17:20,262 This has gone way too far, and if society won't fix it, I will! 314 00:17:20,263 --> 00:17:21,636 What are you gonna do? 315 00:17:21,662 --> 00:17:24,519 Something that should have been done a long time ago. 316 00:17:27,953 --> 00:17:31,037 It's the morning News with Tom and Tammy Thompson. 317 00:17:31,522 --> 00:17:37,148 A little girl is making big waves with her fight against Photoshop. 318 00:17:37,186 --> 00:17:40,114 Nine-year-old Wendy Testaburger started a campaign 319 00:17:40,115 --> 00:17:44,936 and tomorrow will speak before the State Senate to ban the use of Photoshop images, 320 00:17:44,937 --> 00:17:47,209 saying they're harmful to young girls. 321 00:17:47,397 --> 00:17:49,460 Young lady, what is your message? 322 00:17:49,486 --> 00:17:52,129 Watching what Photoshop is doing to society... 323 00:17:52,130 --> 00:17:55,854 Little girls are aspiring to have bodies they can't possibly have! 324 00:17:55,855 --> 00:17:57,861 We have to put a stop to it. 325 00:17:57,949 --> 00:18:00,754 And you're not just being a hater. 326 00:18:01,276 --> 00:18:02,579 No... 327 00:18:02,605 --> 00:18:04,528 'Cause sometimes girls who aren't well liked, 328 00:18:04,529 --> 00:18:06,864 you know, lash out at pretty and popular girls. 329 00:18:06,865 --> 00:18:09,062 Are you well liked at your school? 330 00:18:09,710 --> 00:18:11,618 Not lately, no. 331 00:18:11,619 --> 00:18:14,153 Uh-huh. But you're not being jelly. 332 00:18:14,155 --> 00:18:18,950 No, that has nothing to do with me wanting to protest against Photoshop images. 333 00:18:18,951 --> 00:18:21,847 OK, because I do understand that the Jelly School in Aurora 334 00:18:21,873 --> 00:18:24,055 is ready to take you in, is that right, Rick? 335 00:18:24,080 --> 00:18:26,420 Tom, I'm standing in front of the Jelly School 336 00:18:26,421 --> 00:18:29,484 where officials claim they do have room for this little hater girl. 337 00:18:29,485 --> 00:18:31,395 We're being told, if she doesn't stop... 338 00:18:31,421 --> 00:18:34,544 That's not a Jelly School. That's a Dunkin' Donuts. 339 00:18:36,065 --> 00:18:38,811 Well, okay, but you are a hater. 340 00:18:38,812 --> 00:18:43,331 That's fine! People can call me whatever names they want to. I don't care! 341 00:18:43,332 --> 00:18:46,342 There's a cancer in our country and I'm not going to rest 342 00:18:46,343 --> 00:18:50,518 until Photoshop images are required to be labeled for what they are - fake. 343 00:18:50,519 --> 00:18:54,330 And nothing in his world is going to stop me. 344 00:19:06,920 --> 00:19:08,544 Ah! What do you want? 345 00:19:11,957 --> 00:19:16,650 Once upon a time there was a little hobbit that lived in the forest. 346 00:19:16,651 --> 00:19:21,273 And all the hobbit ever wanted was to be beautiful. 347 00:19:21,373 --> 00:19:24,771 And even though she was short and fat and hairy, 348 00:19:24,772 --> 00:19:29,068 this little hobbit dreams that one day she could be pretty like Beyonce. 349 00:19:31,092 --> 00:19:35,603 And then one day, along came a magic powder called Photoshop. 350 00:19:35,939 --> 00:19:40,078 And just like that, poof! The little hobbit was beautiful. 351 00:19:40,614 --> 00:19:45,592 And even though she still couldn't sing like Beyonce or dance like Beyonce, 352 00:19:45,619 --> 00:19:49,864 or act like Beyonce or be a decent human being like Beyonce, 353 00:19:50,143 --> 00:19:52,691 the little hobbit was looked up to and loved... 354 00:19:52,716 --> 00:19:54,716 Just like Beyonce! 355 00:19:55,295 --> 00:19:57,926 Soon she had money and adoration, 356 00:19:57,927 --> 00:20:01,621 and a hip-hop fiancé who loved her very much. I'm sorry. Hold up. 357 00:20:02,883 --> 00:20:04,579 Hold up, I'm sorry. 358 00:20:05,314 --> 00:20:07,292 Everything was good for the hobbit, 359 00:20:07,293 --> 00:20:10,350 but then this mean little girl called the jelly monster. 360 00:20:10,581 --> 00:20:14,326 She was so jelly of the hobbit that she told everyone she was a liar... 361 00:20:14,942 --> 00:20:18,994 And the hobbit's fiancé realized she was just a hobbit and you know what he said? 362 00:20:18,996 --> 00:20:20,999 He said I don't care! 363 00:20:21,164 --> 00:20:22,553 And then the jelly monster came 364 00:20:22,579 --> 00:20:25,521 and tried to take the powder away from the little hobbit. 365 00:20:25,810 --> 00:20:27,749 So the hobbit prayed to God... 366 00:20:27,774 --> 00:20:30,053 And God said, "Don't worry, little hobbit." 367 00:20:30,078 --> 00:20:32,307 "I will go find this jelly monster girl" 368 00:20:32,308 --> 00:20:35,306 "and I will read her a story and melt her icy heart." 369 00:20:35,888 --> 00:20:37,626 And the hobbit said, "Thank you", 370 00:20:37,651 --> 00:20:41,517 and the hobbit and God lived happily ever after because I love her so much. 371 00:20:42,938 --> 00:20:45,169 I'm sorry. Hold up. Hold up. 372 00:20:45,170 --> 00:20:47,782 - Hold up. I'm sorry. - I'm sorry. 373 00:20:47,792 --> 00:20:51,617 - I'm sorry that I've been jelly. - It's okay. Hold up. 374 00:20:51,618 --> 00:20:54,619 No, I've been a hater and I really am sorry. 375 00:20:54,621 --> 00:20:57,395 It's okay. I've been jelly before too. I'm sorry. 376 00:21:26,762 --> 00:21:28,949 ___ 377 00:21:36,395 --> 00:21:39,395 Synced by Reef www.addic7ed.com