1 00:00:44,752 --> 00:00:47,118 Another great race today, Johnny. 2 00:00:47,154 --> 00:00:49,520 Who are you gonna ride in the Stakes? 3 00:00:49,557 --> 00:00:52,185 Eddie, like my daddy always used to say... 4 00:00:52,226 --> 00:00:54,751 and I live by it... 5 00:00:54,795 --> 00:00:57,093 "Never change horses in midstream." 6 00:00:57,131 --> 00:01:01,500 Never change horses. Sounds like a smart bet. 7 00:01:02,503 --> 00:01:04,801 Always stick with a winner. 8 00:01:06,207 --> 00:01:07,367 Keep America working. 9 00:01:08,743 --> 00:01:11,268 Don't change horses in midstream. 10 00:01:11,312 --> 00:01:14,076 On election day, reelect the president. 11 00:01:28,529 --> 00:01:30,895 Can you step this way, Mr. Brean? 12 00:01:30,931 --> 00:01:32,728 Lift your arms, please. 13 00:01:34,535 --> 00:01:37,265 That's him. That's Mr. Fix-it. 14 00:02:53,647 --> 00:02:54,909 It's right here. 15 00:03:05,292 --> 00:03:07,021 You have a seat here, Connie. 16 00:03:07,061 --> 00:03:09,052 He doesn't know anything. 17 00:03:14,168 --> 00:03:16,432 John Levy's staff, his assistant... 18 00:03:16,470 --> 00:03:18,529 and Amy Cain, Press. 19 00:03:23,844 --> 00:03:26,608 Thank you. That'll be all. 20 00:03:26,647 --> 00:03:29,013 - Want some coffee? - Black, please. 21 00:03:29,049 --> 00:03:31,711 Gaviston, bring some coffee. Black. 22 00:03:33,220 --> 00:03:36,678 You kids in this room... 23 00:03:36,724 --> 00:03:38,851 what you hear and say here... 24 00:03:38,893 --> 00:03:41,555 if it gets out, you leaked it. 25 00:03:41,595 --> 00:03:42,857 Tell them what they need to know. 26 00:03:42,897 --> 00:03:45,923 When it broke, the president said, "Get me Conrad Brean." 27 00:03:48,402 --> 00:03:50,131 What's the thing? 28 00:03:50,171 --> 00:03:53,368 He had an illegal immigrant nanny years back? 29 00:03:53,407 --> 00:03:57,036 You get ahead in the polls, suddenly you get nervous. 30 00:03:57,077 --> 00:04:00,478 He made a pass at some secretary years ago? 31 00:04:00,514 --> 00:04:03,108 A group of Firefly Girls were here last month. 32 00:04:03,150 --> 00:04:05,641 One expressed interest in a Frederic Remington bust. 33 00:04:05,686 --> 00:04:08,519 They went in the office behind the Oval Office. 34 00:04:08,556 --> 00:04:11,116 It couldn't have been over three minutes. 35 00:04:11,158 --> 00:04:13,217 The Secret Service will confirm that. 36 00:04:13,260 --> 00:04:14,625 It's not the illegal immigrant nanny thing? 37 00:04:16,030 --> 00:04:17,759 The girl's alleging... 38 00:04:22,236 --> 00:04:24,431 Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. 39 00:04:24,471 --> 00:04:28,134 Maybe we could say it was a drug reaction to the flu. 40 00:04:28,175 --> 00:04:29,472 Who's got the story? 41 00:04:29,510 --> 00:04:31,000 Don't you want to know if it's true? 42 00:04:31,045 --> 00:04:32,376 What's the difference? 43 00:04:32,413 --> 00:04:34,847 It's a story. They'll run with it. 44 00:04:34,882 --> 00:04:36,315 How long till it breaks? 45 00:04:36,350 --> 00:04:38,341 Front page, Washington Post, tomorrow. 46 00:04:38,385 --> 00:04:40,580 That's not good. 47 00:04:40,621 --> 00:04:43,715 - Where is he? - China. 48 00:04:43,757 --> 00:04:45,622 When is he due back? 49 00:04:45,659 --> 00:04:48,457 They're set to leave soon. 50 00:04:50,664 --> 00:04:53,929 He stays on the ground in China at least another day. 51 00:04:53,968 --> 00:04:55,902 Why? 52 00:04:55,936 --> 00:04:57,426 You the Press Office? 53 00:04:57,471 --> 00:04:59,132 Earn your money. He's ill. 54 00:04:59,173 --> 00:05:00,606 When do we bring him back? 55 00:05:00,641 --> 00:05:03,303 I'm gonna need a day. 56 00:05:03,344 --> 00:05:05,312 He's sick. Get that out now. 57 00:05:05,346 --> 00:05:07,473 Tell the jackals how sick he is. 58 00:05:07,514 --> 00:05:10,506 We gotta get that out before the story breaks. 59 00:05:10,551 --> 00:05:12,883 Issue a bulletin. He's got some rare strain... 60 00:05:12,920 --> 00:05:15,787 - Won't hold. - I need running time. 61 00:05:15,823 --> 00:05:17,120 It won't hold a day. 62 00:05:17,157 --> 00:05:18,886 It will. I'll tell you why. 63 00:05:18,926 --> 00:05:20,393 Why is the president in China? 64 00:05:20,427 --> 00:05:22,725 - Trade relations. - You're right. 65 00:05:22,763 --> 00:05:25,061 It's got nothing to do with the B-3 bomber. 66 00:05:25,099 --> 00:05:28,728 - There is no B-3 bomber. - I just said that. 67 00:05:28,769 --> 00:05:31,237 I don't know why these rumors get started. 68 00:05:32,640 --> 00:05:35,507 I need $20,000. I need a car. 69 00:05:35,542 --> 00:05:37,407 Get me a car and driver. 70 00:05:37,444 --> 00:05:39,071 The southwest gate. 71 00:05:41,515 --> 00:05:42,812 What? 72 00:05:43,918 --> 00:05:45,215 What is it? 73 00:05:45,252 --> 00:05:47,652 Campaign commercial. Should we look at it? 74 00:05:47,688 --> 00:05:50,657 Put it in. This should be interesting. 75 00:05:50,691 --> 00:05:53,091 What is it? 76 00:05:53,127 --> 00:05:55,095 The other side's new commercial. 77 00:05:55,129 --> 00:05:56,357 The Neal commercial. 78 00:05:56,397 --> 00:05:58,365 We had somebody steal it. 79 00:05:58,399 --> 00:06:01,266 This'll be on the air the day after tomorrow. 80 00:06:01,302 --> 00:06:04,135 In the final days of the campaign... 81 00:06:04,171 --> 00:06:06,071 has the president changed his tune? 82 00:06:06,106 --> 00:06:09,405 Thank heaven for little girls. 83 00:06:09,443 --> 00:06:11,775 The presidency is about honor. 84 00:06:11,812 --> 00:06:15,270 Thank heaven for little girls. 85 00:06:15,316 --> 00:06:17,011 It's about principles. 86 00:06:17,051 --> 00:06:20,384 Without them, what would little boys do? 87 00:06:20,421 --> 00:06:22,981 It's about integrity. 88 00:06:23,023 --> 00:06:25,150 This tune has got to change. 89 00:06:25,192 --> 00:06:30,255 On election day, vote Neal for president. 90 00:06:31,332 --> 00:06:33,562 Oh, boy. 91 00:06:33,600 --> 00:06:36,091 Who's gonna take the press conference today? 92 00:06:36,136 --> 00:06:38,070 Is there a press conference today? 93 00:06:38,105 --> 00:06:39,402 What do you think? 94 00:06:39,440 --> 00:06:42,307 We have to use this as a base of operations. 95 00:06:42,343 --> 00:06:44,436 I'm gonna need one, two days. 96 00:06:44,478 --> 00:06:47,470 Whoever's leaking that stuff to the Post lets it slip... 97 00:06:47,514 --> 00:06:50,540 "I hope this won't screw up the B-3 program." 98 00:06:50,584 --> 00:06:53,917 "What B-3 program, and why should it screw it up?" 99 00:06:53,954 --> 00:06:56,115 "If the president deploys the B-3... 100 00:06:56,156 --> 00:06:58,147 before it's fully tested..." 101 00:06:58,192 --> 00:07:00,626 "Deploy the B-3 before it's fully tested?" 102 00:07:00,661 --> 00:07:02,754 "Why?" 103 00:07:02,796 --> 00:07:04,195 "The crisis." 104 00:07:04,231 --> 00:07:06,825 - What crisis? - I'm working on that. 105 00:07:08,936 --> 00:07:10,767 Get General Scott and the Joint Chiefs of Staff... 106 00:07:10,804 --> 00:07:12,635 and put them on a plane to Seattle. 107 00:07:12,673 --> 00:07:14,641 He's nervous to talk to the Boeing people. 108 00:07:16,043 --> 00:07:17,203 But what? 109 00:07:17,244 --> 00:07:18,802 There isn't a B-3 bomber. 110 00:07:18,846 --> 00:07:20,473 - Where'd you go to school? - Dartmouth. 111 00:07:20,514 --> 00:07:22,880 Then show a little spunk. There is no B-3 bomber. 112 00:07:22,916 --> 00:07:24,349 General Scott, to your knowledge... 113 00:07:24,385 --> 00:07:26,148 is not in Seattle to talk to Boeing. 114 00:07:26,186 --> 00:07:27,483 It won't prove out. 115 00:07:27,521 --> 00:07:30,922 It doesn't have to prove out. We just gotta distract them. 116 00:07:30,958 --> 00:07:32,516 Got less than two weeks till the election. 117 00:07:32,559 --> 00:07:35,722 What in the world would do that? 118 00:07:35,763 --> 00:07:36,957 I'm working on it. 119 00:07:44,104 --> 00:07:45,469 Winifred, Mr. Brean. 120 00:07:46,573 --> 00:07:47,870 - What's this? - $20,000. 121 00:07:47,908 --> 00:07:50,968 I gotta go to L.A. And see a Hollywood producer. 122 00:07:51,011 --> 00:07:52,979 Meet me at National in an hour. 123 00:07:53,013 --> 00:07:55,140 We'll go to Chicago and connect there to L.A. 124 00:07:55,182 --> 00:07:56,706 See you at National. 125 00:08:04,158 --> 00:08:06,820 Tell me this again. 126 00:08:06,860 --> 00:08:08,191 We landing? 127 00:08:09,530 --> 00:08:11,054 Tell me again. 128 00:08:11,098 --> 00:08:13,464 Don't worry. It's nothing new. 129 00:08:13,500 --> 00:08:17,527 During Reagan's administration, 240 Marines killed in Beirut. 130 00:08:17,571 --> 00:08:19,436 24 hours later, we invade Grenada. 131 00:08:19,473 --> 00:08:20,872 That was their M.O. 132 00:08:20,908 --> 00:08:22,273 Change the story, change the lead. 133 00:08:22,309 --> 00:08:23,867 It's not a new concept. 134 00:08:23,911 --> 00:08:25,879 Wake me when we land. We'll talk more. 135 00:08:25,913 --> 00:08:28,177 Wait. We can't afford a war. 136 00:08:28,215 --> 00:08:30,206 We're not having a war. 137 00:08:30,250 --> 00:08:31,808 We're having the appearance of a war. 138 00:08:31,852 --> 00:08:33,444 We cannot afford it. 139 00:08:33,487 --> 00:08:36,422 - What'll it cost? - But they would find out. 140 00:08:36,457 --> 00:08:38,425 Who's gonna find out? The American people? 141 00:08:38,459 --> 00:08:40,450 Who's gonna tell them? 142 00:08:40,494 --> 00:08:44,123 What did they find out about the Gulf War? 143 00:08:44,164 --> 00:08:46,724 One video of one bomb falls down a chimney. 144 00:08:46,767 --> 00:08:48,462 The building could have been made out of Legos. 145 00:08:48,502 --> 00:08:51,562 - You want us to go to war? - That's the general idea. 146 00:08:53,273 --> 00:08:54,968 With who? 147 00:08:55,008 --> 00:08:56,600 I'm working on it. 148 00:08:59,046 --> 00:09:00,240 Albania? 149 00:09:02,249 --> 00:09:03,409 Why? 150 00:09:03,450 --> 00:09:05,645 Why not? What do you know about them? 151 00:09:05,686 --> 00:09:07,916 - Nothing. - Precisely. 152 00:09:07,955 --> 00:09:10,685 They seem shifty, standoffish. 153 00:09:10,724 --> 00:09:13,955 Who knows from Albania? Who trusts Albanians? 154 00:09:13,994 --> 00:09:15,928 What did Albania ever do to us? 155 00:09:15,963 --> 00:09:17,021 What did they do for us? 156 00:09:17,064 --> 00:09:19,931 This is why we have to mobilize the B-3 bomber. 157 00:09:19,967 --> 00:09:21,867 You really want to go to war with Albania? 158 00:09:21,902 --> 00:09:25,133 We don't have a choice. This is what you do. 159 00:09:25,172 --> 00:09:27,538 Get your press office right now to deny it. 160 00:09:27,574 --> 00:09:28,871 It didn't happen. 161 00:09:28,909 --> 00:09:31,707 "There is no report of Albanian activity." 162 00:09:31,745 --> 00:09:33,269 They have to deny it. 163 00:09:33,313 --> 00:09:36,248 - It didn't happen. - Deny. 164 00:09:36,283 --> 00:09:39,150 ... news from the president on his visit to China. 165 00:09:39,186 --> 00:09:40,915 Another sort of news, however... 166 00:09:40,954 --> 00:09:42,717 has emerged from the presidential quarter. 167 00:09:42,756 --> 00:09:45,748 We turn to Melissa Gardner at KZAB in Santa Fe... 168 00:09:45,792 --> 00:09:46,986 with this breaking news. 169 00:09:47,861 --> 00:09:50,659 Thanks, Richard. Today a local Firefly Girl... 170 00:09:50,697 --> 00:09:53,461 accused the president of sexual misconduct. 171 00:09:53,500 --> 00:09:55,764 This photo of the president with the girls... 172 00:09:55,802 --> 00:09:58,862 was taken during their tour of the White House. 173 00:09:58,906 --> 00:10:00,931 The girl claims that the sexual misconduct... 174 00:10:00,974 --> 00:10:03,534 occurred inside the Oval Office. 175 00:10:03,577 --> 00:10:05,636 Her attorney says there are no plans yet... 176 00:10:05,679 --> 00:10:07,078 to hold a press conference. 177 00:10:07,114 --> 00:10:09,776 Folks in Santa Fe and the rest of America... 178 00:10:09,816 --> 00:10:11,977 are waiting for a response from the White House... 179 00:10:12,019 --> 00:10:14,078 on these harsh allegations. 180 00:10:14,121 --> 00:10:17,852 With the election days away, the big question is... 181 00:10:17,891 --> 00:10:21,122 how much will this scandal affect the outcome? 182 00:10:21,161 --> 00:10:22,458 Top people, Albanian desk. 183 00:10:22,496 --> 00:10:25,260 I don't know, either, but we probably have one. 184 00:10:25,299 --> 00:10:27,290 Roust them out of bed. 185 00:10:27,334 --> 00:10:30,030 Albanian desk, CIA, NSA. Roust them, sirens blaring. 186 00:10:30,070 --> 00:10:32,197 I know they're gonna be up in an hour. 187 00:10:32,239 --> 00:10:34,264 I want them up now. Tell your staff... 188 00:10:34,308 --> 00:10:35,605 General Scott in Seattle? 189 00:10:35,642 --> 00:10:40,079 I don't think his trip has to do with the B-3 bomber. 190 00:10:40,113 --> 00:10:42,411 I'll have to ask you to turn that off. 191 00:10:42,449 --> 00:10:44,417 It'll just be a second. 192 00:10:44,451 --> 00:10:46,385 There are no electronics on the plane. 193 00:10:46,420 --> 00:10:48,547 I have to ask you to turn that off. 194 00:10:48,589 --> 00:10:50,022 It'll just take two seconds. 195 00:10:50,057 --> 00:10:52,890 We've said flat out there is no B-3 bomber. 196 00:10:52,926 --> 00:10:54,723 I understand. 197 00:10:54,761 --> 00:10:58,219 If it is true, he should, he must step down... 198 00:10:58,265 --> 00:11:01,598 and if it's not true, then he must... 199 00:11:01,635 --> 00:11:04,729 We are informed he has extended his visit to China. 200 00:11:04,771 --> 00:11:07,899 I say on behalf of the American people, come home. 201 00:11:07,941 --> 00:11:10,808 Face the music, whatever that may be. 202 00:11:10,844 --> 00:11:12,334 The election's in 11 days. 203 00:11:12,379 --> 00:11:14,574 Let the American people decide. 204 00:11:14,615 --> 00:11:16,082 "Let the American people decide." 205 00:11:16,116 --> 00:11:18,914 Senator Neal, presidential candidate. 206 00:11:18,952 --> 00:11:20,510 Excuse me, Senator... 207 00:11:20,554 --> 00:11:22,488 That's 11 days till the election... 208 00:11:22,522 --> 00:11:25,082 and the president ahead in the polls by... Bob? 209 00:11:25,125 --> 00:11:26,558 Seventeen percent. 210 00:11:26,593 --> 00:11:30,654 Accusations have surfaced which could affect the outcome... 211 00:11:30,697 --> 00:11:32,062 The White House has announced... 212 00:11:32,099 --> 00:11:33,862 in response to the media pressure... 213 00:11:33,900 --> 00:11:35,697 there will be a press conference. 214 00:11:35,736 --> 00:11:37,966 This is how a Hollywood producer lives? 215 00:11:38,005 --> 00:11:40,530 This is bigger than the White House. 216 00:11:43,343 --> 00:11:45,208 Get me my veggie shake... 217 00:11:45,245 --> 00:11:47,679 and remind me to turn over in 10 minutes... 218 00:11:47,714 --> 00:11:50,114 to tan the other side. 219 00:11:50,150 --> 00:11:52,948 Do I know you? 220 00:11:52,986 --> 00:11:55,477 We have mutual friends in Washington. 221 00:11:55,522 --> 00:11:58,923 Yes, as you said, and is it true? 222 00:11:58,959 --> 00:12:00,950 Mr. Motss, I wouldn't... 223 00:12:00,994 --> 00:12:03,792 You wouldn't be here if it wasn't true. 224 00:12:03,830 --> 00:12:07,596 Really, who could say? 225 00:12:07,634 --> 00:12:10,228 I like the guy. He signed his book to me... 226 00:12:10,270 --> 00:12:13,398 "For two generations..." What was it? 227 00:12:13,440 --> 00:12:16,102 "For progress to occur," I think he said. 228 00:12:16,143 --> 00:12:19,203 Two Generations to Agree, yes. 229 00:12:19,246 --> 00:12:21,237 That's what he inscribed. How'd you know that? 230 00:12:21,281 --> 00:12:22,612 That's the title of the book. 231 00:12:22,649 --> 00:12:23,980 That's the title? 232 00:12:25,652 --> 00:12:28,280 For Progress to Occur It's Necessary for Two... 233 00:12:28,322 --> 00:12:29,755 That's a terrible title. 234 00:12:32,492 --> 00:12:34,619 You're right. 235 00:12:34,661 --> 00:12:37,528 For Two Generations to Agree. That is the title. 236 00:12:37,564 --> 00:12:39,191 I never looked at the cover. 237 00:12:39,232 --> 00:12:40,199 I just looked at what he wrote to me. 238 00:12:40,233 --> 00:12:42,428 When you get the time, read the cover. 239 00:12:42,469 --> 00:12:45,768 John Levy is expected to respond to the allegations... 240 00:12:45,806 --> 00:12:47,467 of sexual misconduct by the president. 241 00:12:48,642 --> 00:12:50,234 This guy is fucked. 242 00:12:53,613 --> 00:12:57,572 What one has to do, Mr. Motss, is fight a holding action. 243 00:12:57,617 --> 00:13:00,347 They'll run this man through the shredder. 244 00:13:00,387 --> 00:13:03,288 If we hold the break in the dam till the election... 245 00:13:03,323 --> 00:13:04,654 we got a chance. 246 00:13:04,691 --> 00:13:06,989 You can't hold the dam. 247 00:13:07,027 --> 00:13:09,257 I don't get what you want me to do. 248 00:13:10,731 --> 00:13:15,031 ... advised him to stay in China for one or two days. 249 00:13:15,068 --> 00:13:18,003 During that time, of course, we'll remain... 250 00:13:18,038 --> 00:13:20,006 But he's gotta come back sometime. 251 00:13:20,040 --> 00:13:21,905 What is one or two days gonna buy you? 252 00:13:21,942 --> 00:13:23,569 Look at all those hands. 253 00:13:23,610 --> 00:13:25,271 Brer Rabbit couldn't get out of this. 254 00:13:25,312 --> 00:13:27,610 Would you comment please on the rumors... 255 00:13:27,647 --> 00:13:30,673 that the president's delay... 256 00:13:30,717 --> 00:13:32,810 is due to the situation in Albania? 257 00:13:34,221 --> 00:13:36,314 There is... 258 00:13:36,356 --> 00:13:38,824 I'm not aware of the situation to which you refer. 259 00:13:38,859 --> 00:13:40,850 We'vejust learned that the State Department... 260 00:13:40,894 --> 00:13:44,330 has set up a special Albanian task force at Ops Center. 261 00:13:44,364 --> 00:13:48,596 Mr. Sklansky, I am... We have... Mrs. Rose? 262 00:13:48,635 --> 00:13:52,503 Early this morning, General Scott flew to Seattle. 263 00:13:52,539 --> 00:13:55,736 Is his trip connected with the B-3 bomber? 264 00:13:55,776 --> 00:14:00,770 To the best of my knowledge, there is no B-3 bomber. 265 00:14:00,814 --> 00:14:03,840 Mr. Levy, is the situation in Albania related... 266 00:14:03,884 --> 00:14:06,375 to the Muslim fundamentalist anti-American uprising? 267 00:14:06,420 --> 00:14:09,082 Now they get it. 268 00:14:09,122 --> 00:14:12,148 There you go. There's a little help. 269 00:14:12,192 --> 00:14:15,958 ... that have fundamentalist movements... 270 00:14:15,996 --> 00:14:18,089 How close are you to this? 271 00:14:18,131 --> 00:14:19,996 What do you want the kid to say? 272 00:14:23,336 --> 00:14:26,601 We will keep you apprised of any new information. 273 00:14:26,640 --> 00:14:30,201 At this time, there is no information... 274 00:14:30,243 --> 00:14:33,178 Have him say... 275 00:14:33,213 --> 00:14:36,148 I know we're all concerned for the president. 276 00:14:36,183 --> 00:14:40,347 I'm sure that our hopes and prayers are with him. 277 00:14:40,387 --> 00:14:42,287 Could you have Levy say... 278 00:14:42,322 --> 00:14:44,313 "I know we're all concerned for the president. 279 00:14:44,357 --> 00:14:45,824 I'm sure our hopes and prayers are with him." 280 00:14:47,828 --> 00:14:53,164 I want to say I know we are all concerned for the president... 281 00:14:53,200 --> 00:14:55,668 and our hopes and prayers are with him. 282 00:14:55,702 --> 00:14:56,930 He didn't phrase it right. 283 00:14:56,970 --> 00:14:58,494 He didn't sell the line. 284 00:15:02,676 --> 00:15:04,974 You bought yourself one day, maybe two. 285 00:15:05,011 --> 00:15:07,502 All I need is 11 till the election. 286 00:15:07,547 --> 00:15:09,947 This isn't gonna hold for 11 days. 287 00:15:09,983 --> 00:15:12,110 - The guy fucked a Girl Scout. - A Firefly Girl. 288 00:15:12,152 --> 00:15:14,382 He fucked a Firefly Girl. 289 00:15:14,421 --> 00:15:16,787 What are you gonna do to hold that off? 290 00:15:16,823 --> 00:15:18,518 I'm gonna get my veggie shake. 291 00:15:18,558 --> 00:15:19,991 What do you think would hold it off? 292 00:15:20,026 --> 00:15:21,186 Nothing. 293 00:15:23,096 --> 00:15:25,656 You'd have to have a war. 294 00:15:29,002 --> 00:15:31,937 You're kidding. You're not kidding. 295 00:15:35,942 --> 00:15:38,911 I'm in show business. Why come to me? 296 00:15:40,213 --> 00:15:42,408 I'll tell you why. 297 00:15:42,449 --> 00:15:45,145 "54, 40, or fight." What does that mean? 298 00:15:45,185 --> 00:15:47,176 - It's a slogan. - "Remember the Maine." 299 00:15:48,588 --> 00:15:50,021 "Tippecanoe and Tyler, too." 300 00:15:51,558 --> 00:15:52,991 They're war slogans. 301 00:15:53,026 --> 00:15:55,551 We remember the slogans, not the wars. 302 00:15:55,595 --> 00:15:56,960 You know why? 303 00:15:56,997 --> 00:15:58,965 That's show business. That's why we're here. 304 00:15:58,999 --> 00:16:01,229 Naked girl, covered in napalm. 305 00:16:01,268 --> 00:16:02,599 "V" for victory. 306 00:16:02,636 --> 00:16:05,696 5 Marines raising the flag, Mount Surabachi. 307 00:16:06,473 --> 00:16:09,101 You remember the picture in 50 years, but forget the war. 308 00:16:09,142 --> 00:16:11,872 The Gulf War, smart bomb falling down a chimney. 309 00:16:11,912 --> 00:16:14,107 2,500 missions a day, 100 days. 310 00:16:14,147 --> 00:16:16,411 One video of one bomb. 311 00:16:16,449 --> 00:16:18,178 The American people bought that war. 312 00:16:18,218 --> 00:16:21,187 War is show business. That's why we're here. 313 00:16:21,221 --> 00:16:23,815 What do you do for the president? 314 00:16:24,958 --> 00:16:26,391 Why Albania? 315 00:16:26,426 --> 00:16:28,053 Why not? 316 00:16:28,094 --> 00:16:29,789 They gotta know at some point. 317 00:16:29,829 --> 00:16:30,989 Who? 318 00:16:34,467 --> 00:16:35,900 The public. 319 00:16:35,936 --> 00:16:37,403 They gotta know? 320 00:16:37,437 --> 00:16:39,462 Get with it. Who killed Kennedy? 321 00:16:39,506 --> 00:16:41,667 I read the first draft of the Warren Report. 322 00:16:41,708 --> 00:16:43,835 Says he was killed by a drunk driver. 323 00:16:43,877 --> 00:16:46,141 The Gulf War. What do you see day after day? 324 00:16:46,179 --> 00:16:48,238 The one smart bomb falling down a chimney. 325 00:16:48,281 --> 00:16:49,543 The truth? 326 00:16:49,583 --> 00:16:51,813 I was in the building when we shot that shot. 327 00:16:51,851 --> 00:16:53,819 We shot it in a studio in Falls Church, Virginia. 328 00:16:53,853 --> 00:16:55,218 1l10 scale model of a building. 329 00:16:55,255 --> 00:16:56,483 Is that true? 330 00:16:56,523 --> 00:16:58,491 How do we know? You take my point? 331 00:16:58,525 --> 00:17:00,186 All right. 332 00:17:00,226 --> 00:17:02,592 You want me to do what? 333 00:17:02,629 --> 00:17:03,994 To produce. 334 00:17:04,030 --> 00:17:06,624 You want me to produce your war? 335 00:17:06,666 --> 00:17:08,531 Not a war. It's a pageant. 336 00:17:08,568 --> 00:17:11,128 We need a theme, a song, some visuals. 337 00:17:11,171 --> 00:17:12,570 It's a pageant. 338 00:17:12,606 --> 00:17:14,665 It's like the Oscars. That's why we came to you. 339 00:17:14,708 --> 00:17:16,403 I never won an Oscar. 340 00:17:16,443 --> 00:17:18,775 That's a shame, but you produced the Oscars. 341 00:17:18,812 --> 00:17:20,439 Indeed, I did. 342 00:17:20,480 --> 00:17:22,812 You're a writer, that's your script. 343 00:17:22,849 --> 00:17:25,113 You're a director, but if you're the producer... 344 00:17:25,151 --> 00:17:27,779 nobody knows what you do. 345 00:17:27,821 --> 00:17:29,686 The producer, all he's got is the credit. 346 00:17:29,723 --> 00:17:32,157 You see? And some plaques on the wall. 347 00:17:32,192 --> 00:17:35,127 They don't know what we do. Don't get me started. 348 00:17:36,129 --> 00:17:37,994 If you never won an Oscar... 349 00:17:38,031 --> 00:17:39,623 how would you like an ambassadorship? 350 00:17:39,666 --> 00:17:42,464 An ambassadorship? That's my payoff? 351 00:17:42,502 --> 00:17:44,129 Tell me what you want. 352 00:17:44,170 --> 00:17:46,968 I'd just do it for a story to tell. 353 00:17:47,007 --> 00:17:48,440 You couldn't tell anybody. 354 00:17:48,475 --> 00:17:50,636 I'm just kidding. 355 00:17:50,677 --> 00:17:53,271 - You couldn't tell anybody. - Just a figure of speech. 356 00:17:53,313 --> 00:17:55,679 It's a pageant. 357 00:17:55,715 --> 00:17:56,943 That's what it is. 358 00:17:56,983 --> 00:17:58,245 The country's at war. 359 00:17:58,284 --> 00:17:59,512 It's Miss America. You're Bert Parks. 360 00:17:59,552 --> 00:18:01,383 - Why Albania? - Because. 361 00:18:01,421 --> 00:18:03,981 What do we have that they want? 362 00:18:04,024 --> 00:18:06,015 - Freedom. - Why would they want that? 363 00:18:06,059 --> 00:18:09,460 - Oppressed? - Fuck freedom. 364 00:18:09,496 --> 00:18:12,761 They want to destroy the godless Satan. 365 00:18:12,799 --> 00:18:14,994 They want to destroy our way of life. 366 00:18:15,035 --> 00:18:16,297 All right? 367 00:18:16,336 --> 00:18:19,464 The president is in China. 368 00:18:19,506 --> 00:18:22,475 He is dealing with the dispatch of the B-3 bomber to Albania. 369 00:18:24,044 --> 00:18:25,705 Why? 370 00:18:27,414 --> 00:18:28,438 Why? Help me. 371 00:18:32,252 --> 00:18:33,412 Geo-politically... 372 00:18:34,788 --> 00:18:37,484 We found out they have the bomb. 373 00:18:41,428 --> 00:18:45,762 - That's good. - And... wait a second. 374 00:18:47,667 --> 00:18:49,396 The bomb's not there... 375 00:18:49,436 --> 00:18:52,530 because they'd have to have a rocket and that shit. 376 00:18:52,572 --> 00:18:55,769 They are a bunch of wogs. Cross that out. 377 00:18:55,809 --> 00:18:57,902 It's a suitcase bomb. 378 00:18:57,944 --> 00:18:59,878 I didn't know I said that. 379 00:18:59,913 --> 00:19:02,381 It's a suitcase bomb. You don't need missiles. 380 00:19:02,415 --> 00:19:04,246 You can put a bomb in a suitcase. 381 00:19:06,586 --> 00:19:09,077 That's good. A suitcase bomb. 382 00:19:09,122 --> 00:19:10,521 It's a suitcase bomb. 383 00:19:12,058 --> 00:19:13,958 When it's cooking, it's cooking. 384 00:19:13,993 --> 00:19:16,120 We're cooking, and it's in... 385 00:19:18,498 --> 00:19:20,693 Canada. All right? 386 00:19:20,734 --> 00:19:23,294 Albanian terrorists have placed a suitcase bomb... 387 00:19:23,336 --> 00:19:27,534 in Canada in an attempt to infiltrate it into the USA. 388 00:19:27,574 --> 00:19:30,873 - That's good. - That's terrific. 389 00:19:30,910 --> 00:19:33,140 I'll tell you why. It is cost effective. 390 00:19:33,179 --> 00:19:35,443 It's producing. That's what it is. 391 00:19:35,482 --> 00:19:38,076 - It's really great. - I could tell you stories. 392 00:19:38,118 --> 00:19:40,416 Cecil B. De Mille, The Greatest Show on Earth... 393 00:19:40,453 --> 00:19:42,421 he needs an elephant. 394 00:19:42,455 --> 00:19:43,683 I got the president on the line. 395 00:19:45,358 --> 00:19:46,518 One minute. 396 00:19:48,461 --> 00:19:51,157 Needs an elephant for a reshoot. Know what he does? 397 00:19:51,197 --> 00:19:53,631 Ames here. Yes, sir? 398 00:19:53,666 --> 00:19:55,634 You listening? 399 00:19:55,668 --> 00:19:57,761 - Nobody's listening. - I'm listening. 400 00:19:57,804 --> 00:20:01,103 - The suitcase bomb. - Good title for a movie. 401 00:20:01,141 --> 00:20:03,200 Please, write it down. Don't editorialize. 402 00:20:03,243 --> 00:20:05,575 The thinking is, terrorism. 403 00:20:05,612 --> 00:20:09,070 Act One: Albania denies everything. 404 00:20:09,115 --> 00:20:12,346 The president comes on the air, "Be calm." 405 00:20:12,385 --> 00:20:13,682 Know what I need? 406 00:20:13,720 --> 00:20:17,486 Get me Johnny Dean, Liz Butsky, and the Fad King. 407 00:20:17,524 --> 00:20:19,014 Isn't Johnny Dean in the... 408 00:20:21,094 --> 00:20:22,356 Back in Nashville. 409 00:20:22,462 --> 00:20:25,954 - Act Two. - We don't need an Act Two. 410 00:20:25,999 --> 00:20:28,797 Don't forget Fad King. We don't need an Act Two? 411 00:20:28,835 --> 00:20:30,826 We just have to hold their interest for 11 days. 412 00:20:30,870 --> 00:20:32,838 It's a teaser. 413 00:20:32,872 --> 00:20:34,533 Absolutely right. 414 00:20:34,574 --> 00:20:37,600 Grace. Teaser. 415 00:20:37,644 --> 00:20:40,340 They're getting a good reaction on the Albanian thing. 416 00:20:40,380 --> 00:20:43,508 Hello, John, you two-bit redneck shitkicker. 417 00:20:43,550 --> 00:20:45,313 How the heck are you? 418 00:20:45,351 --> 00:20:47,319 Get out. 419 00:20:51,624 --> 00:20:53,057 He's got a new wife. 420 00:20:53,092 --> 00:20:56,858 He's riding in a pickup truck with a shotgun and a dog. 421 00:21:02,068 --> 00:21:03,626 We need you here yesterday. 422 00:21:03,670 --> 00:21:07,003 All right? Get your ass out here. 423 00:21:07,040 --> 00:21:09,508 The president wonders about the possible Albanian backlash. 424 00:21:09,542 --> 00:21:12,067 You can't have a war without an enemy. 425 00:21:12,111 --> 00:21:14,477 We could, but it would be dull. 426 00:21:14,514 --> 00:21:16,004 How long do we need him? 427 00:21:16,049 --> 00:21:17,812 We're done in 11 days. 428 00:21:17,851 --> 00:21:20,115 Eleven days. We need you. 429 00:21:20,153 --> 00:21:22,678 You want to write a song for us? 430 00:21:22,722 --> 00:21:25,486 Is there gonna be a back end? 431 00:21:25,558 --> 00:21:27,526 Is there a back end? 432 00:21:27,560 --> 00:21:29,357 Back end? 433 00:21:29,395 --> 00:21:31,363 Percentage points, money. 434 00:21:31,397 --> 00:21:32,887 Count on it. 435 00:21:32,932 --> 00:21:35,696 Where is the back end coming from? 436 00:21:35,735 --> 00:21:38,431 It's like that yellow ribbon thing. 437 00:21:38,471 --> 00:21:41,167 The hostages. 438 00:21:41,207 --> 00:21:43,573 They tied the yellow ribbons around everything. 439 00:21:43,610 --> 00:21:45,510 But that was a naturally occurring... 440 00:21:45,545 --> 00:21:46,739 That was a put-up job? 441 00:21:54,721 --> 00:21:56,814 I want you to get Johnny a ticket. 442 00:21:56,856 --> 00:21:58,414 Fad King on two. 443 00:21:58,458 --> 00:22:01,427 He's riding in a pickup truck with a shotgun and a dog. 444 00:22:03,196 --> 00:22:04,458 Are you shitting me? 445 00:22:04,497 --> 00:22:08,399 King, got a thing here, product placement. 446 00:22:08,434 --> 00:22:09,696 Of course there's a back end. 447 00:22:11,938 --> 00:22:14,202 - It can't be a ribbon. - What's wrong with a ribbon? 448 00:22:14,240 --> 00:22:16,140 AIDS has the yellow ribbon thing. 449 00:22:16,175 --> 00:22:17,437 Fuck ribbons. 450 00:22:17,477 --> 00:22:19,172 Canada. Our neighbor to the north... 451 00:22:19,212 --> 00:22:21,942 all of a sudden transformed into that place from whence... 452 00:22:21,981 --> 00:22:24,142 like the north wind, terror comes. 453 00:22:24,183 --> 00:22:25,650 I like that. Keep talking. 454 00:22:25,685 --> 00:22:27,380 What guards us against Canada? 455 00:22:27,420 --> 00:22:30,878 I guard the Canadian border. 456 00:22:30,924 --> 00:22:32,414 Mounties guard the border. Mountie hats. 457 00:22:32,458 --> 00:22:33,891 Stupid fucking hats. 458 00:22:33,927 --> 00:22:35,326 Davy Crockett had a hat. 459 00:22:35,361 --> 00:22:38,489 You could crush them and put them in your pocket. 460 00:22:38,531 --> 00:22:41,091 You can't put a mountie hat in your pocket. 461 00:22:41,134 --> 00:22:43,796 You see this? This is what producing is. 462 00:22:43,836 --> 00:22:48,000 You put me in a room with talent... electric. 463 00:22:48,041 --> 00:22:49,736 I'm thinking armbands. 464 00:22:49,776 --> 00:22:54,179 - Armbands is good. - I'm thinking green. 465 00:22:54,213 --> 00:22:57,182 Last year, the number one color in new cars was green. 466 00:22:57,216 --> 00:22:59,377 - People like green. - Hunter. 467 00:22:59,419 --> 00:23:02,411 Hunter green. Strong, pride, dignity. 468 00:23:02,455 --> 00:23:04,320 Not Kelly green. 469 00:23:04,357 --> 00:23:06,552 I like it with a hat. 470 00:23:06,592 --> 00:23:08,583 - Maybe. - You see that? 471 00:23:10,930 --> 00:23:14,730 Sit on my lap if you love me... 472 00:23:14,767 --> 00:23:17,668 but don't put your hand down there. 473 00:23:17,704 --> 00:23:19,069 I didn't mean... 474 00:23:19,105 --> 00:23:21,903 We'll take a short nap. 475 00:23:21,941 --> 00:23:24,171 I thought you should see it. 476 00:23:24,210 --> 00:23:25,643 It shouldn't be a song. 477 00:23:25,678 --> 00:23:29,944 I'm glad that your mama's not here. 478 00:23:29,983 --> 00:23:31,575 Don't do a song about it. 479 00:23:31,617 --> 00:23:32,845 I thought it was funny. 480 00:23:32,885 --> 00:23:34,182 Sit on my lap... 481 00:23:34,220 --> 00:23:37,815 I don't think it's appropriate for what we're doing. 482 00:23:37,857 --> 00:23:38,755 I just meant for you to see it. 483 00:23:38,791 --> 00:23:43,160 I guard the Canadian border. 484 00:23:43,196 --> 00:23:45,460 The president spent the weekend pressing the flesh. 485 00:23:45,498 --> 00:23:47,523 He wasn't campaigning. He was dating, actually. 486 00:23:50,803 --> 00:23:54,136 Change this. Thank you. 487 00:23:54,173 --> 00:23:57,040 Behind the mention of Albania, of his stomach flu... 488 00:23:57,076 --> 00:24:00,204 taking refuge these scant days away from the election. 489 00:24:00,246 --> 00:24:02,339 Young girl in rubble. 490 00:24:02,382 --> 00:24:05,545 She was driven from her home by Albanian terrorists. 491 00:24:05,585 --> 00:24:08,349 It is her we are mobilizing to defend. 492 00:24:08,388 --> 00:24:11,289 - Or is it she? - It is her. 493 00:24:11,324 --> 00:24:12,814 Can we get her a kitten? 494 00:24:12,859 --> 00:24:15,225 Young girl in rubble with a kitten. 495 00:24:15,261 --> 00:24:16,523 That's good. 496 00:24:16,562 --> 00:24:19,759 This is too static. 497 00:24:19,799 --> 00:24:22,393 Young girl running from the village. 498 00:24:22,435 --> 00:24:23,697 More energy. 499 00:24:23,736 --> 00:24:26,204 Time to face these terrible charges... 500 00:24:26,239 --> 00:24:29,538 to answer all of these questions. 501 00:24:29,575 --> 00:24:31,600 - What's this? - Head shots. 502 00:24:31,644 --> 00:24:36,377 Girls to play the victim in our news footage. 503 00:24:36,416 --> 00:24:37,678 Write this down. 504 00:24:37,717 --> 00:24:40,117 Young girl running from village towards camera. 505 00:24:40,153 --> 00:24:42,849 Grainy hand-held news footage. 506 00:24:42,889 --> 00:24:44,220 Send it to everyone. 507 00:24:44,257 --> 00:24:47,522 What do you think? I like the sorrowful one. 508 00:24:47,560 --> 00:24:49,721 What is this again? 509 00:24:49,762 --> 00:24:52,754 Young Albanian girl running from her home. 510 00:24:52,799 --> 00:24:54,061 I like this broad here. 511 00:24:54,100 --> 00:24:56,796 Where? Too Texan. 512 00:24:56,836 --> 00:24:58,565 We're locked into Albania. Why? 513 00:24:58,604 --> 00:24:59,935 Albania's hard to rhyme. 514 00:25:00,973 --> 00:25:02,531 What are you looking at me for? 515 00:25:02,575 --> 00:25:03,974 It's the name of the country. 516 00:25:08,948 --> 00:25:10,506 That rhymes. 517 00:25:11,951 --> 00:25:14,613 - John Belushi? - Jim. 518 00:25:14,654 --> 00:25:16,087 Jim Belushi. 519 00:25:16,122 --> 00:25:18,352 - Jim Belushi what? - Albanian? 520 00:25:18,391 --> 00:25:20,188 Jim Belushi's Albanian? 521 00:25:20,226 --> 00:25:21,591 Are you kidding? 522 00:25:21,627 --> 00:25:24,960 Know anybody who's eaten in an Albanian restaurant? 523 00:25:24,997 --> 00:25:27,727 - Is there such a thing? - Has to be. 524 00:25:27,767 --> 00:25:31,498 - Is there a national dish? - We can make it up. 525 00:25:31,537 --> 00:25:33,334 Jim Belushi is Albanian. 526 00:25:50,123 --> 00:25:51,420 What time is it? 527 00:25:52,792 --> 00:25:54,487 3:03. 528 00:25:54,527 --> 00:25:55,789 Great idea. 529 00:25:55,828 --> 00:25:59,355 To the men and women of the 303 detachment with their... 530 00:25:59,398 --> 00:26:00,888 Leopard skin. 531 00:26:00,933 --> 00:26:02,958 With their berets. 532 00:26:03,002 --> 00:26:04,435 How about all black? 533 00:26:04,470 --> 00:26:06,438 That's good. 534 00:26:06,472 --> 00:26:07,871 Half black, half leopard... 535 00:26:07,907 --> 00:26:10,068 wear it on your head. 536 00:26:10,109 --> 00:26:13,010 Half black, half leopard... 537 00:26:13,045 --> 00:26:15,605 wear it to your bed. 538 00:26:15,648 --> 00:26:17,946 Half black, half leopard. 539 00:26:18,985 --> 00:26:20,145 I guard... 540 00:26:21,487 --> 00:26:23,387 the American dream. 541 00:26:25,992 --> 00:26:27,152 I guard... 542 00:26:27,994 --> 00:26:31,088 the American dream. 543 00:26:39,505 --> 00:26:42,303 Everybody's always in a hurry these days. 544 00:26:42,341 --> 00:26:44,332 If they're not rushing somewhere... 545 00:26:44,377 --> 00:26:46,971 they're changing something that doesn't need changing. 546 00:26:47,013 --> 00:26:50,414 That's why I'm glad we're behind the president. 547 00:26:50,449 --> 00:26:53,885 Sure we are. Itjust makes good sense. 548 00:26:53,920 --> 00:26:56,354 You don't want to change horses in midstream. 549 00:26:56,389 --> 00:26:58,721 Why are they sticking with this age-old horseshit? 550 00:26:58,758 --> 00:27:01,022 Why are they sticking with the same garbage? 551 00:27:01,060 --> 00:27:04,223 - Who hires these people? - I feel insulted having seen it. 552 00:27:04,263 --> 00:27:07,357 - It's offensive. - Poorly costumed. 553 00:27:07,400 --> 00:27:11,063 New York Times, Washington Post: War. 554 00:27:11,103 --> 00:27:14,163 Times got the Firefly Girl in the Style section. 555 00:27:14,207 --> 00:27:16,971 Post on page 12. 556 00:27:17,009 --> 00:27:19,170 It's good. Hello? 557 00:27:20,346 --> 00:27:22,246 It's very important. Listen up. 558 00:27:22,281 --> 00:27:25,580 It's all war. You're doing good. 559 00:27:25,618 --> 00:27:28,280 Would you vote for that person based on that commercial? 560 00:27:28,321 --> 00:27:30,516 - I don't vote. - Why don't you vote? 561 00:27:30,556 --> 00:27:32,854 When Major League Baseball started the fans voting... 562 00:27:32,892 --> 00:27:34,325 I voted for Boog Powell on first base. 563 00:27:34,360 --> 00:27:36,658 He didn't get in, and it disappointed me. 564 00:27:36,696 --> 00:27:37,958 It's futile. 565 00:27:37,997 --> 00:27:39,965 You've never voted for president? 566 00:27:41,033 --> 00:27:42,227 Do you vote? 567 00:27:42,268 --> 00:27:44,998 No. I always vote for the Academy Awards... 568 00:27:45,037 --> 00:27:46,368 but I never win. 569 00:27:46,405 --> 00:27:47,633 Liz, do you vote? 570 00:27:47,673 --> 00:27:50,233 I don't vote. I don't like the rooms. 571 00:27:50,276 --> 00:27:52,574 Too claustrophobic. I can't vote in small places. 572 00:27:53,479 --> 00:27:55,310 It's about that time. 573 00:28:04,724 --> 00:28:08,660 We got the Albanian girl with a cat, a kitten, and a dog. 574 00:28:08,694 --> 00:28:10,855 I don't want a dog. I asked for a kitten. 575 00:28:10,896 --> 00:28:13,956 I understand that, but the pet wrangler suggested... 576 00:28:14,000 --> 00:28:17,128 I need to speak to the president before you pick an animal. 577 00:28:17,169 --> 00:28:20,536 Can't they find me a kitten? Listen to me. 578 00:28:20,573 --> 00:28:22,871 Albanian terrorists have a staging area... 579 00:28:22,908 --> 00:28:25,570 for their atomic workshop. That's why she's fleeing. 580 00:28:25,611 --> 00:28:27,704 What if it wasn't Albania? Say it was Italy? 581 00:28:27,747 --> 00:28:30,511 I can get a lot of cash if it's Italy. 582 00:28:30,549 --> 00:28:33,746 "Give them the boot." What if a shoe was the fad? 583 00:28:33,786 --> 00:28:36,812 The little girl is coming toward the camera. 584 00:28:36,856 --> 00:28:39,484 What does she have in her hands? A kitten. 585 00:28:39,525 --> 00:28:41,459 Albania doesn't do anything for me. 586 00:28:41,494 --> 00:28:42,893 That's the problem. 587 00:28:42,928 --> 00:28:45,396 - We're locked into Albania. - Why is that? 588 00:28:46,966 --> 00:28:49,799 The president's going to war in about 30 minutes. 589 00:28:49,835 --> 00:28:51,302 Declaring war on Albania? 590 00:28:51,337 --> 00:28:53,498 We're not declaring war. We're going to war. 591 00:28:53,539 --> 00:28:55,871 We haven't declared war since World War II. 592 00:28:55,908 --> 00:28:57,375 We're going to war. 593 00:29:01,113 --> 00:29:04,173 This late-breaking news just in from Air Force One. 594 00:29:04,216 --> 00:29:05,649 The president of the United States... 595 00:29:05,685 --> 00:29:09,086 has said he apologizes for the need for secrecy... 596 00:29:09,121 --> 00:29:11,282 and he assures that it is necessary... 597 00:29:11,324 --> 00:29:14,054 for the safety of the men and women in combat. 598 00:29:14,093 --> 00:29:16,254 He says that the Republic of Albania... 599 00:29:16,295 --> 00:29:20,026 long a staging ground for terrorism around the world. 600 00:29:20,066 --> 00:29:24,002 He mentioned a state of war is or is about to happen... 601 00:29:24,036 --> 00:29:26,937 between the United States and the Republic of Albania. 602 00:29:26,972 --> 00:29:28,496 How many kittens do we have? 603 00:29:28,541 --> 00:29:30,839 There ought to be kittens a-plenty. I called. 604 00:29:31,210 --> 00:29:34,475 People, let's get started. 605 00:29:37,516 --> 00:29:39,848 My name is Stanley Motss. I'll be your producer. 606 00:29:39,885 --> 00:29:41,978 What I would like you to do, Miss... 607 00:29:42,021 --> 00:29:43,249 Tracy Lime. 608 00:29:43,289 --> 00:29:45,553 Stand against that wall, and on my signal... 609 00:29:45,591 --> 00:29:47,889 I want you running toward me, screaming. 610 00:29:47,927 --> 00:29:50,020 - Can we get you anything? - I'm fine. 611 00:29:50,062 --> 00:29:53,054 How about a cup of tea? A little milk, low fat? 612 00:29:53,099 --> 00:29:54,327 You OK? 613 00:29:54,367 --> 00:29:56,494 Fine. Let's try one. 614 00:29:56,535 --> 00:29:58,867 Is this a national? Is that the case? 615 00:29:58,904 --> 00:30:00,963 It's a direct buy-out. 616 00:30:01,006 --> 00:30:03,440 Have your agent... What is this? 617 00:30:03,476 --> 00:30:05,376 What is this, a menagerie? 618 00:30:05,411 --> 00:30:07,936 I can't wait to put this on my résumé. 619 00:30:07,980 --> 00:30:10,813 Can I talk to you for a minute? 620 00:30:10,850 --> 00:30:12,545 This is a special kind of situation. 621 00:30:14,420 --> 00:30:17,389 We have a schnauzer and what appears to be... 622 00:30:17,423 --> 00:30:18,583 It's a Lhasa apso. 623 00:30:20,059 --> 00:30:21,651 It couldn't have been simpler. Kittens. 624 00:30:21,694 --> 00:30:25,824 What you got here is a cross between a dog... 625 00:30:25,865 --> 00:30:27,628 I just want kittens. 626 00:30:27,666 --> 00:30:30,191 Absolutely, sir. The president wants a kitten. 627 00:30:30,236 --> 00:30:32,329 I want a kitten. 628 00:30:32,371 --> 00:30:35,499 Get rid of the dogs and keep the kittens. 629 00:30:35,541 --> 00:30:37,008 Miss. Excuse me. 630 00:30:37,042 --> 00:30:39,772 I have to have you sign this sheet of paper. 631 00:30:39,812 --> 00:30:42,406 My agent would be miffed with me if l... 632 00:30:42,448 --> 00:30:44,211 This doesn't have to do with your deal. 633 00:30:44,250 --> 00:30:46,275 This is your security clearance. 634 00:30:47,686 --> 00:30:48,948 Right there. 635 00:30:51,490 --> 00:30:52,855 Nice signature. Thank you. 636 00:30:52,892 --> 00:30:54,291 Nice meeting you. 637 00:30:59,465 --> 00:31:01,228 This is a nice one. 638 00:31:01,267 --> 00:31:02,996 That's a cat. These are kittens. 639 00:31:03,035 --> 00:31:04,696 They wanted to give options. 640 00:31:04,737 --> 00:31:08,730 It's too confusing. He's pushing the Lopso opso. 641 00:31:08,774 --> 00:31:10,833 - We'll do it optically. - Digitally. 642 00:31:10,876 --> 00:31:12,969 Let's try to shoot one. 643 00:31:13,012 --> 00:31:14,707 - Stacey... - Tracy. 644 00:31:14,747 --> 00:31:17,215 I want you to stand over here. 645 00:31:17,249 --> 00:31:19,547 Here you go. Right there. 646 00:31:19,585 --> 00:31:20,916 These are chips. 647 00:31:24,790 --> 00:31:26,052 Hold the bag when you run. 648 00:31:26,091 --> 00:31:28,025 It's for the arm position. On screen, it'll be a kitten. 649 00:31:28,060 --> 00:31:29,527 Can I hold the kitten? 650 00:31:29,562 --> 00:31:31,029 We'll punch it in later. 651 00:31:31,063 --> 00:31:32,792 You're gonna punch the kitten later? 652 00:31:32,832 --> 00:31:34,060 Why? 653 00:31:34,099 --> 00:31:35,862 For a wider set of options. 654 00:31:35,901 --> 00:31:38,267 A wider option of what? 655 00:31:38,304 --> 00:31:39,999 Of kittens. 656 00:31:41,307 --> 00:31:46,210 Sir, all kidding aside, I get to put it on my résumé? 657 00:31:46,245 --> 00:31:47,837 Actually, no. 658 00:31:47,880 --> 00:31:51,281 What is it, a guild thing or something? 659 00:31:51,317 --> 00:31:53,649 You can never tell anyone you did this. 660 00:31:53,686 --> 00:31:54,983 What could they do? 661 00:31:55,020 --> 00:31:57,454 They'd come to your house and kill you. 662 00:31:57,490 --> 00:31:59,617 The president. 663 00:31:59,658 --> 00:32:01,853 Stop the makeup. She's been raped by terrorists. 664 00:32:01,894 --> 00:32:03,794 - She's not pale enough. - Jump out. 665 00:32:03,829 --> 00:32:06,195 They're starting to shoot now... 666 00:32:06,232 --> 00:32:09,360 and they're gonna do the kitten thing optically. 667 00:32:09,401 --> 00:32:11,130 That's right, Mr. President. 668 00:32:11,170 --> 00:32:13,104 I don't know how they do the kitten optically... 669 00:32:13,138 --> 00:32:15,072 but they know what they're doing. 670 00:32:19,745 --> 00:32:22,043 She's not an illegal immigrant, is she? 671 00:32:22,081 --> 00:32:23,309 Could I see the contract? 672 00:32:23,349 --> 00:32:25,180 Why is it so flat? 673 00:32:25,217 --> 00:32:28,709 Because the president cannot employ an illegal immigrant. 674 00:32:28,754 --> 00:32:30,551 - Let's use more spray. - Cover up. 675 00:32:30,589 --> 00:32:32,420 Let's keep working! 676 00:32:32,458 --> 00:32:33,982 Are we getting there? 677 00:32:37,563 --> 00:32:40,930 Good. Put the village behind her. 678 00:32:49,074 --> 00:32:51,542 Gimme some flames. 679 00:32:54,046 --> 00:32:56,412 How about some screaming? 680 00:32:56,448 --> 00:32:57,745 Screaming's good. 681 00:32:57,783 --> 00:32:59,717 Some sound of screaming. 682 00:33:03,689 --> 00:33:06,988 What might be good is ooh-ahh sirens. 683 00:33:07,026 --> 00:33:09,017 You know. Anne Frank. 684 00:33:09,061 --> 00:33:11,120 That's good. 685 00:33:11,163 --> 00:33:13,097 Find us the Anne Frank sirens. 686 00:33:13,132 --> 00:33:14,963 That's chilling. That's good. 687 00:33:15,000 --> 00:33:16,467 That's giving me goose bumps. 688 00:33:17,570 --> 00:33:19,060 Find us the ooh-ahhs. 689 00:33:25,911 --> 00:33:28,072 We're gonna be back in Washington when? 690 00:33:28,113 --> 00:33:29,637 We'll be back tonight. 691 00:33:29,682 --> 00:33:31,343 Tonight is... 692 00:33:31,383 --> 00:33:34,318 It seems that Senator Neal has discovered something. 693 00:33:34,353 --> 00:33:36,913 It makes no difference about Senator Neal. 694 00:33:36,956 --> 00:33:39,720 I don't care what he's got. We got a war. 695 00:33:41,827 --> 00:33:43,522 Look at that girl. 696 00:33:43,562 --> 00:33:45,052 Doesn't she look Albanian? 697 00:33:45,097 --> 00:33:47,588 She looks like she was born and raised in Albania. 698 00:33:49,001 --> 00:33:51,469 I got an instinct for casting. Don't ask me why. 699 00:33:51,503 --> 00:33:53,437 We're gonna do it again, sweetie. 700 00:33:53,472 --> 00:33:55,702 - What's her name, Stacey? - Tracy. 701 00:33:55,741 --> 00:33:58,005 One more time. You're doing fine. 702 00:34:00,279 --> 00:34:02,747 Could she be running across a bridge? 703 00:34:04,149 --> 00:34:07,209 She's running across a burning bridge. 704 00:34:14,193 --> 00:34:16,889 - That looks good. - That's beautiful. 705 00:34:16,929 --> 00:34:18,726 Of course, we'll need some water. 706 00:34:18,764 --> 00:34:20,561 Is it a stream? 707 00:34:20,599 --> 00:34:21,964 I think... 708 00:34:22,001 --> 00:34:24,367 - A pond? - I think... 709 00:34:24,403 --> 00:34:26,928 I think it's a calico kitten. 710 00:34:26,972 --> 00:34:29,532 She's running across with a kitten. 711 00:34:29,575 --> 00:34:32,009 Can we have a calico kitten? Please? 712 00:34:32,044 --> 00:34:34,672 Floyd, punch in a calico kitten. 713 00:34:34,713 --> 00:34:36,340 I have 19 screens here. 714 00:34:36,382 --> 00:34:38,145 I can't see one calico kitten. 715 00:34:38,183 --> 00:34:41,880 The thinking is a small calico kitten, sir. 716 00:34:49,628 --> 00:34:51,528 We have a small calico kitten. 717 00:34:54,667 --> 00:34:56,532 - What? - He wants a white one. 718 00:34:56,568 --> 00:34:58,502 He wants a white one? 719 00:35:00,172 --> 00:35:01,696 Let me talk to him. 720 00:35:01,740 --> 00:35:03,708 He's mobilizing the sixth fleet. 721 00:35:03,742 --> 00:35:05,539 Can I talk to him? 722 00:35:05,577 --> 00:35:07,340 He's mobilizing the sixth fleet. 723 00:35:08,981 --> 00:35:11,916 I hate it when they start to meddle. 724 00:35:11,950 --> 00:35:13,417 Can we have a white one? 725 00:35:13,452 --> 00:35:14,817 He wants a white one. 726 00:35:18,657 --> 00:35:19,954 Thank you. 727 00:35:29,868 --> 00:35:31,529 Are we ready yet? 728 00:35:31,570 --> 00:35:34,562 How soon can we get this cut? 729 00:35:34,606 --> 00:35:36,301 4 or 5 hours. 730 00:35:36,341 --> 00:35:39,276 That's good. We can leak that to the press... 731 00:35:39,311 --> 00:35:41,836 they can downlink it on Tel star 401, transporter 21. 732 00:35:43,549 --> 00:35:45,574 Makes you glad you've lived this long. 733 00:35:48,087 --> 00:35:51,614 This just in... a special report from the Albanian front. 734 00:35:51,657 --> 00:35:53,022 We'vejust received information... 735 00:35:53,058 --> 00:35:56,323 the young Albanian national fleeing in this video... 736 00:35:56,361 --> 00:35:58,261 is attempting to escape terrorist reprisals... 737 00:35:58,297 --> 00:35:59,559 in her village. 738 00:36:04,603 --> 00:36:06,594 America has seldom witnessed... 739 00:36:06,638 --> 00:36:08,765 a more poignant picture of the human race... 740 00:36:08,807 --> 00:36:10,832 Fantastic. 741 00:36:10,876 --> 00:36:12,537 They used the same process... 742 00:36:12,578 --> 00:36:14,205 with the last Schwarzenegger movie. 743 00:36:15,614 --> 00:36:17,309 Isn't that amazing how they do that? 744 00:36:17,349 --> 00:36:19,681 This is only the beginning. 745 00:36:19,718 --> 00:36:21,447 Wait till we get the song. 746 00:36:21,487 --> 00:36:24,183 Then you got the song, image, merchandising tie-ins. 747 00:36:24,223 --> 00:36:25,554 This is only the beginning. 748 00:36:25,591 --> 00:36:28,617 We were right. You're the man. 749 00:36:28,660 --> 00:36:30,719 To the beginning. 750 00:36:30,763 --> 00:36:32,230 Got your car. 751 00:36:32,264 --> 00:36:34,960 I hate it when they send these long ones. 752 00:36:35,000 --> 00:36:37,525 - Did you make the turn OK? - Not a problem. 753 00:36:37,569 --> 00:36:39,696 I'm sorry. You think it's too ostentatious? 754 00:36:39,738 --> 00:36:41,137 Just fine. I'll stretch out. 755 00:36:41,173 --> 00:36:42,504 Good. Just make due. 756 00:36:44,042 --> 00:36:45,509 I'll see you in Nashville. 757 00:36:47,780 --> 00:36:49,941 Go with the two-tone hat. 758 00:36:49,982 --> 00:36:52,450 I don't care. You work it out. 759 00:36:52,484 --> 00:36:55,647 You. You must have had similar situations in the past. 760 00:36:55,687 --> 00:36:59,384 There are unconfirmed reports from a reliable source... 761 00:36:59,424 --> 00:37:01,255 that things are in motion. 762 00:37:01,293 --> 00:37:03,853 What I'm hearing... and this is a quote... 763 00:37:03,896 --> 00:37:05,796 "The president is looking for a swift... 764 00:37:05,831 --> 00:37:08,129 painless, and victorious conclusion to the war." 765 00:37:08,167 --> 00:37:11,261 However, the source will not go on record. 766 00:37:11,303 --> 00:37:14,431 All I can tell you is this comes from the highest level. 767 00:37:14,473 --> 00:37:16,304 New York Times, Washington Post... 768 00:37:16,341 --> 00:37:17,672 Detroit Register, Sacramento Bee... 769 00:37:17,709 --> 00:37:20,701 all in remission. No mention of the Firefly Girl. 770 00:37:20,746 --> 00:37:23,340 10 days to go. Big Bird lands when? 771 00:37:23,382 --> 00:37:24,906 Five a.m. 772 00:37:24,950 --> 00:37:26,247 Anything at the airport? 773 00:37:26,285 --> 00:37:28,014 The press thought no. What do you think? 774 00:37:28,053 --> 00:37:30,044 Here's what I think. Is it gonna rain? 775 00:37:30,088 --> 00:37:31,817 Can you give me the weather tomorrow morning? 776 00:37:31,857 --> 00:37:33,347 Andrews, five a.m. 777 00:37:33,392 --> 00:37:35,451 A young Albanian girl... 778 00:37:35,494 --> 00:37:37,257 dressed in her... whatever. 779 00:37:37,296 --> 00:37:40,823 Is there some harvest festival... 780 00:37:40,866 --> 00:37:43,198 an Albanian harvest festival, something like that? 781 00:37:43,235 --> 00:37:45,465 Find me an Albanian harvest festival. 782 00:37:45,504 --> 00:37:46,801 There's gotta be something. 783 00:37:46,839 --> 00:37:48,966 Anyway, she gives him the sacred whatever it is... 784 00:37:49,007 --> 00:37:51,771 telling him this is a sacred traditional offering... 785 00:37:51,810 --> 00:37:54,278 given to the man who ties the first sheaf... 786 00:37:54,313 --> 00:37:56,440 the last sheaf, who knows what sheaf? 787 00:37:56,481 --> 00:37:57,880 Is she saying this in Albanian? 788 00:37:57,916 --> 00:37:59,213 She's speaking in Albanian... 789 00:37:59,251 --> 00:38:01,515 because this is the only way it can be understood... 790 00:38:01,553 --> 00:38:04,215 by her sacred, sainted, and aged mother... 791 00:38:05,290 --> 00:38:07,190 We're picking them up now. 792 00:38:07,226 --> 00:38:10,457 The old lady starts to speak. 793 00:38:10,495 --> 00:38:12,360 "You have brought peace not only to this..." 794 00:38:12,397 --> 00:38:14,763 The child speaks. 795 00:38:14,800 --> 00:38:16,665 A face of innocence, no cynicism. 796 00:38:16,702 --> 00:38:17,999 The child says... 797 00:38:18,036 --> 00:38:19,663 Are you getting this? 798 00:38:19,705 --> 00:38:22,469 The old broad starts to cry. 799 00:38:22,507 --> 00:38:24,475 Big Bird shrugs off his secret service... 800 00:38:24,509 --> 00:38:26,636 covers her with his coat, end of story. 801 00:38:26,678 --> 00:38:30,478 Can you find out if we could get some rain tomorrow? 802 00:38:30,515 --> 00:38:32,346 How is Big Bird holding up? 803 00:38:32,384 --> 00:38:33,612 He's good. 804 00:38:33,652 --> 00:38:36,644 He does want to know... what does Motss want? 805 00:38:36,688 --> 00:38:39,213 I don't know. Ambassador to Togo. 806 00:38:39,258 --> 00:38:42,557 No rain tomorrow at Andrews, but there's rain at Boca Raton. 807 00:38:42,594 --> 00:38:44,562 Then direct the plane to Boca. 808 00:38:44,596 --> 00:38:46,826 Connie says divert the plane to Boca. 809 00:38:53,705 --> 00:38:54,967 What's happening? 810 00:39:11,290 --> 00:39:13,281 Can I help you? 811 00:39:13,325 --> 00:39:14,656 What's the problem? 812 00:39:15,894 --> 00:39:17,384 We're in a rush. 813 00:39:17,429 --> 00:39:19,693 Do you know who we are? 814 00:39:19,731 --> 00:39:21,596 I'm afraid that's the trouble, Miss Ames. 815 00:39:21,633 --> 00:39:23,396 CIA. 816 00:39:30,409 --> 00:39:32,502 I have this to say... 817 00:39:41,586 --> 00:39:44,578 ... every American man, woman, and child... 818 00:39:44,623 --> 00:39:46,284 What am I gonna do? 819 00:39:46,325 --> 00:39:47,758 I have a three-year-old daughter... 820 00:39:47,793 --> 00:39:49,624 eventually headed for orthodonture. 821 00:39:49,661 --> 00:39:52,494 Now that the CIA knows, I'm gonna lose everything... 822 00:39:52,531 --> 00:39:54,726 my career, my reputation. What am I gonna do? 823 00:39:54,766 --> 00:39:56,734 Brazen it through. 824 00:39:56,768 --> 00:39:58,497 Took you long enough. 825 00:39:58,537 --> 00:40:00,630 We found them as soon as we could. 826 00:40:00,672 --> 00:40:02,537 All right. 827 00:40:02,574 --> 00:40:05,543 After I'm done with them, what do they want me to do? 828 00:40:05,577 --> 00:40:07,977 Lug them back to the district or dump them in the country... 829 00:40:08,013 --> 00:40:09,503 let the FBI trip over them? 830 00:40:09,548 --> 00:40:11,539 Legal department says you pick. 831 00:40:11,583 --> 00:40:13,141 Depends on what we want to do with them. 832 00:40:13,185 --> 00:40:15,983 This is a special report on the war in Albania. 833 00:40:16,021 --> 00:40:17,613 We'vejust received more details... 834 00:40:17,656 --> 00:40:19,624 on the Albanian girl running for her life. 835 00:40:19,658 --> 00:40:21,285 The young girl was trying to escape... 836 00:40:21,326 --> 00:40:23,294 after hearing her family was killed. 837 00:40:23,328 --> 00:40:25,728 Apparently, there was a family connection in Canada. 838 00:40:30,235 --> 00:40:31,759 Two things I know to be true... 839 00:40:32,938 --> 00:40:35,873 there's no difference between good flan and bad flan... 840 00:40:35,907 --> 00:40:37,431 and there is no war. 841 00:40:37,476 --> 00:40:38,773 Guess who I am. 842 00:40:38,810 --> 00:40:41,802 I would like to point out that I am under medical care... 843 00:40:41,847 --> 00:40:44,281 and taking medication, side effects of which have... 844 00:40:44,316 --> 00:40:45,977 Quite touching. 845 00:40:46,018 --> 00:40:47,679 I also take this opportunity... 846 00:40:47,719 --> 00:40:50,415 to suggest that, equally, I admit to nothing... 847 00:40:50,455 --> 00:40:52,013 and I would like my lawyer present. 848 00:40:52,057 --> 00:40:53,991 We show, and NSA confirms... 849 00:40:54,026 --> 00:40:56,893 there are no nuclear devices on the Canadian border. 850 00:40:56,928 --> 00:40:59,158 There are no nuclear devices in Albania. 851 00:40:59,197 --> 00:41:01,188 Albania has no nuclear capacity. 852 00:41:01,233 --> 00:41:02,894 Our spy satellites... 853 00:41:02,934 --> 00:41:05,095 show no secret terrorist training camps... 854 00:41:05,137 --> 00:41:07,071 in the Albanian hinterland. 855 00:41:07,105 --> 00:41:10,074 The border patrol, the FBI, the RCMP report... 856 00:41:10,108 --> 00:41:13,737 no... repeat... no untoward activity... 857 00:41:13,779 --> 00:41:16,077 along our picturesque Canadian border. 858 00:41:16,114 --> 00:41:19,106 The Albanian government is screaming its defense. 859 00:41:19,151 --> 00:41:20,448 The world is listening. 860 00:41:20,485 --> 00:41:21,918 There is no war. 861 00:41:21,953 --> 00:41:24,478 There's a war. I'm watching it on television. 862 00:41:24,523 --> 00:41:26,514 Who might you be? 863 00:41:26,558 --> 00:41:29,152 - Conrad Brean. - Who do you work for? 864 00:41:29,194 --> 00:41:32,595 Nobody whose name you want me to say. 865 00:41:32,631 --> 00:41:35,691 It's all well, but when the fit hits the shan... 866 00:41:35,734 --> 00:41:37,326 somebody has to stay after school. 867 00:41:37,369 --> 00:41:38,859 Who might that be? 868 00:41:38,904 --> 00:41:41,236 I don't know what you're talking about. 869 00:41:41,273 --> 00:41:43,741 The spy satellites show it. 870 00:41:43,775 --> 00:41:45,072 They show no war. 871 00:41:45,110 --> 00:41:46,634 Then what good are they? 872 00:41:46,678 --> 00:41:50,011 Why spend a quarter trillion dollars a year on defense? 873 00:41:50,048 --> 00:41:51,481 What good are they? 874 00:41:51,516 --> 00:41:52,949 Are they useless or just broken? 875 00:41:52,984 --> 00:41:54,849 I would like to point out further... 876 00:41:54,886 --> 00:41:56,751 that these medications taken in conjunction... 877 00:41:56,788 --> 00:41:59,450 If there's no threat, then where are you? 878 00:41:59,491 --> 00:42:01,118 If there's no threat, what good are you? 879 00:42:01,159 --> 00:42:03,354 You are the threat. 880 00:42:03,395 --> 00:42:04,794 I'm the threat? 881 00:42:04,830 --> 00:42:06,263 What have I been doing the last 30 years... 882 00:42:06,298 --> 00:42:08,289 that you haven't been doing? 883 00:42:08,333 --> 00:42:10,164 The last 30 years... 884 00:42:10,202 --> 00:42:12,136 I have been working to ensure the security of my country. 885 00:42:12,170 --> 00:42:15,230 I'm sure that speaks well of you and your parents... 886 00:42:15,273 --> 00:42:17,605 but if forced to choose between the security of your country... 887 00:42:17,642 --> 00:42:19,906 and the security of your job, which would you pick? 888 00:42:19,945 --> 00:42:22,539 While you hesitate, permit me to suggest... 889 00:42:22,581 --> 00:42:24,913 that they are one in the same. 890 00:42:24,950 --> 00:42:27,441 I'm doing my job. That's what you see me doing. 891 00:42:27,486 --> 00:42:29,078 I'm doing my job, too. 892 00:42:29,121 --> 00:42:30,349 The constant stress I am under... 893 00:42:30,388 --> 00:42:33,289 Let me ask you a simple question. 894 00:42:33,325 --> 00:42:35,657 Why do people go to war? 895 00:42:35,694 --> 00:42:38,219 I'll play your silly game. 896 00:42:38,263 --> 00:42:39,525 To ensure their way of life. 897 00:42:39,564 --> 00:42:41,555 - Would you fight to do that? - I have. 898 00:42:41,600 --> 00:42:44,296 If you went to war again, who would it be against? 899 00:42:44,336 --> 00:42:46,566 Your ability to fight a two-ocean war against who? 900 00:42:46,605 --> 00:42:47,833 Sweden and Togo? 901 00:42:47,873 --> 00:42:49,966 That time has passed. It's over. 902 00:42:50,008 --> 00:42:52,772 The war of the future is nuclear terrorism. 903 00:42:52,811 --> 00:42:54,745 It'll be against a small group of dissidents... 904 00:42:54,779 --> 00:42:57,873 who, unbeknownst perhaps to their own governments, have... 905 00:42:57,916 --> 00:43:00,111 To go to that war, you have to be prepared. 906 00:43:00,152 --> 00:43:02,643 You gotta be alert. The public has gotta be alert... 907 00:43:02,687 --> 00:43:04,882 because that is the war of the future... 908 00:43:04,923 --> 00:43:07,687 and if you're not gearing up to fight that war... 909 00:43:07,726 --> 00:43:09,853 then the ax will fall. You'll be out in the street. 910 00:43:09,895 --> 00:43:12,989 You can call this a drill, call this job security... 911 00:43:13,031 --> 00:43:15,465 call it anything you like, but I got one for you. 912 00:43:15,500 --> 00:43:17,161 Go to war to preserve your way of life? 913 00:43:17,202 --> 00:43:20,501 Chuck, this is your way of life. 914 00:43:20,539 --> 00:43:22,507 If your spy satellites don't see nothing... 915 00:43:22,541 --> 00:43:24,133 if there ain't no war... 916 00:43:24,176 --> 00:43:27,145 then you can go home and take up golf... 917 00:43:27,179 --> 00:43:29,238 'cause there ain't no war but ours. 918 00:43:33,685 --> 00:43:34,982 Thank you. 919 00:43:36,154 --> 00:43:37,746 Drive carefully. 920 00:43:46,565 --> 00:43:47,793 Nice enough people. 921 00:43:47,832 --> 00:43:49,424 They just hadn't thought it through. 922 00:43:49,467 --> 00:43:51,298 You talked us out of there. 923 00:43:51,336 --> 00:43:53,497 We got delayed. We're going to Nashville. 924 00:43:53,538 --> 00:43:54,766 What? 925 00:43:54,806 --> 00:43:56,603 You could talk a dog off a meat truck. 926 00:43:56,641 --> 00:43:58,541 Thank you. 927 00:43:58,577 --> 00:44:00,010 We just got stuck. 928 00:44:00,045 --> 00:44:02,741 All systems five-by-five. See you in Nashville. 929 00:44:02,781 --> 00:44:04,373 You saved our bacon. 930 00:44:04,416 --> 00:44:06,646 It was just a... 931 00:44:06,685 --> 00:44:09,051 a phenomenal performance. 932 00:44:09,087 --> 00:44:10,679 You turned them around. 933 00:44:12,324 --> 00:44:13,882 They hadn't thought it through. 934 00:44:20,865 --> 00:44:23,026 He's moving across the tarmac. 935 00:44:26,137 --> 00:44:29,231 But it appears something has distracted the president... 936 00:44:29,274 --> 00:44:31,765 and he has stopped moving toward the waiting motorcade. 937 00:44:31,810 --> 00:44:33,607 There's a little girl... 938 00:44:33,645 --> 00:44:35,510 trying to speak to the president. 939 00:44:35,547 --> 00:44:37,378 It seems she's speaking in... 940 00:44:37,415 --> 00:44:38,905 Is it Albanian? 941 00:44:38,950 --> 00:44:40,713 Can we get someone to translate? 942 00:44:42,087 --> 00:44:44,351 Dan, I think what she is saying... 943 00:44:44,389 --> 00:44:48,348 is that this wheat offering is sort of ceremonial... 944 00:44:48,393 --> 00:44:50,953 and that it is the first sheaf... 945 00:44:50,996 --> 00:44:52,691 the first cut of the harvest. 946 00:44:52,731 --> 00:44:54,722 I'm not proficient in Albanian... 947 00:44:54,766 --> 00:44:56,393 but the old woman is quite taken... 948 00:44:56,434 --> 00:44:58,698 as the president is offering her the coat. 949 00:44:58,737 --> 00:45:01,365 It is quite an emotional moment here. 950 00:45:01,406 --> 00:45:03,738 There comes a time... 951 00:45:04,643 --> 00:45:07,942 in the course of human events... 952 00:45:08,647 --> 00:45:11,411 when a threat must be answered... 953 00:45:12,350 --> 00:45:14,181 with courage and strength. 954 00:45:15,287 --> 00:45:18,779 Our forefathers earned... 955 00:45:18,823 --> 00:45:21,257 the right to be free. 956 00:45:21,293 --> 00:45:23,955 Now it's time... 957 00:45:23,995 --> 00:45:27,988 to guard their dream. 958 00:45:28,033 --> 00:45:31,127 We guard... 959 00:45:31,169 --> 00:45:35,333 our American borders. 960 00:45:35,373 --> 00:45:37,807 We guard... 961 00:45:37,842 --> 00:45:41,005 the American dream. 962 00:45:41,046 --> 00:45:43,708 We guard our right... 963 00:45:43,748 --> 00:45:48,685 to fight for democracy... 964 00:45:48,720 --> 00:45:54,215 and keep our country free. 965 00:45:55,026 --> 00:45:58,086 We guard... 966 00:45:58,129 --> 00:46:00,757 our American spirit. 967 00:46:02,500 --> 00:46:04,730 We guard... 968 00:46:04,769 --> 00:46:07,567 the American dream. 969 00:46:19,284 --> 00:46:21,514 Our country's built... 970 00:46:22,487 --> 00:46:24,648 on the rock of liberty. 971 00:46:25,857 --> 00:46:28,826 And we, as people... 972 00:46:28,860 --> 00:46:31,055 must keep it free. 973 00:46:31,096 --> 00:46:34,156 It is for life... 974 00:46:34,199 --> 00:46:35,496 liberty... 975 00:46:35,533 --> 00:46:38,730 the pursuit of happiness... 976 00:46:38,770 --> 00:46:43,901 Freedom, 'tis of thee. 977 00:46:45,677 --> 00:46:48,009 We guard... 978 00:46:48,046 --> 00:46:52,107 our American borders. 979 00:46:52,150 --> 00:46:54,584 We guard... 980 00:46:54,619 --> 00:46:57,588 the American dream. 981 00:46:58,757 --> 00:47:00,725 I loved the fat, wet Albanian broad. 982 00:47:00,759 --> 00:47:02,056 Thank you. 983 00:47:02,093 --> 00:47:03,856 You know why? It was understated. 984 00:47:03,895 --> 00:47:05,624 You got lucky with the rain, too. 985 00:47:05,663 --> 00:47:07,995 We had to divert the plane to Boca Raton. 986 00:47:08,032 --> 00:47:10,364 You should have come to me. We have rain machines. 987 00:47:10,402 --> 00:47:11,733 I'm a producer. I make rain. 988 00:47:11,770 --> 00:47:13,169 Next time. 989 00:47:14,272 --> 00:47:15,864 I havejust gotten word... 990 00:47:15,907 --> 00:47:19,240 that the situation in Albania is resolved... 991 00:47:19,277 --> 00:47:21,541 that it is resolved. 992 00:47:21,579 --> 00:47:23,274 The CIA confirms... 993 00:47:23,314 --> 00:47:26,283 that our troops along the Canadian border... 994 00:47:26,317 --> 00:47:29,047 and overseas are standing down. 995 00:47:30,321 --> 00:47:34,382 I must take this opportunity to call upon our president... 996 00:47:34,426 --> 00:47:36,519 What does he mean, the situation has been resolved? 997 00:47:36,561 --> 00:47:38,222 He just ended the war. 998 00:47:38,263 --> 00:47:39,525 He ended the war? 999 00:47:39,564 --> 00:47:40,997 Why did he do that? 1000 00:47:41,032 --> 00:47:42,556 I think the CIA cut a better deal. 1001 00:47:42,600 --> 00:47:43,862 He ended the war? 1002 00:47:46,738 --> 00:47:48,228 He can't end the war. 1003 00:47:48,273 --> 00:47:50,298 He's not producing this. 1004 00:47:53,812 --> 00:47:55,541 This is in bad taste. 1005 00:47:55,580 --> 00:47:56,911 Can we stop this? 1006 00:47:59,784 --> 00:48:01,308 Stop. It's over. 1007 00:48:02,787 --> 00:48:04,379 Can we stop this? 1008 00:48:04,422 --> 00:48:05,912 Stop the choir. 1009 00:48:07,926 --> 00:48:09,689 It has been quite a week, Richard. 1010 00:48:09,727 --> 00:48:12,059 I can't remember when any president... 1011 00:48:12,096 --> 00:48:13,859 was hit with the flu, a war... 1012 00:48:13,898 --> 00:48:16,492 and accused of sexual misconduct by a teenage girl... 1013 00:48:16,534 --> 00:48:17,967 all in the same seven-day period. 1014 00:48:18,002 --> 00:48:21,699 This, of course, only days before he runs for reelection. 1015 00:48:21,739 --> 00:48:24,105 We'vejust received information from sources at the CIA... 1016 00:48:24,142 --> 00:48:27,305 that confirms the cessation of hostilities... 1017 00:48:27,345 --> 00:48:28,607 The CIA. 1018 00:48:31,850 --> 00:48:33,784 I thought they let us out too easily. 1019 00:48:33,818 --> 00:48:35,683 The war's over. 1020 00:48:35,720 --> 00:48:37,745 It's over. I saw it on television. 1021 00:48:37,789 --> 00:48:39,051 I have to sell my house. 1022 00:48:39,090 --> 00:48:42,218 The war is not over. 1023 00:48:42,260 --> 00:48:43,625 I saw it on TV. 1024 00:48:43,661 --> 00:48:46,425 That's what you hired me for. 1025 00:48:46,464 --> 00:48:48,898 The war isn't over until I say it's over. 1026 00:48:48,933 --> 00:48:51,367 This is my picture. This is not the CIA's picture. 1027 00:48:51,402 --> 00:48:54,371 You think you're in a tight spot now? 1028 00:48:54,405 --> 00:48:57,169 Try making The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. 1029 00:48:57,208 --> 00:48:59,176 Three of the horsemen died. 1030 00:48:59,210 --> 00:49:02,008 Hear what he's saying? Three of the horsemen died... 1031 00:49:02,046 --> 00:49:04,276 two weeks before the end of principal photography. 1032 00:49:04,315 --> 00:49:06,579 This is nothing. 1033 00:49:06,618 --> 00:49:09,815 This is just Act One, "The War." 1034 00:49:09,854 --> 00:49:13,813 We really do need an Act Two, so we work. 1035 00:49:13,858 --> 00:49:15,086 Act Two. 1036 00:49:15,126 --> 00:49:16,491 You know what it's like? 1037 00:49:16,528 --> 00:49:18,223 The Japanese. In the caves. 1038 00:49:18,263 --> 00:49:20,356 - Go on. - Okinawa. 1039 00:49:20,398 --> 00:49:22,332 They didn't believe the war was over. 1040 00:49:22,367 --> 00:49:24,460 We have a guy who doesn't believe... 1041 00:49:24,502 --> 00:49:26,629 We have an American serviceman. 1042 00:49:26,671 --> 00:49:29,538 A brave American serviceman is left behind. 1043 00:49:29,574 --> 00:49:31,769 A hero. 1044 00:49:31,809 --> 00:49:34,073 I can't believe it. What was I thinking? 1045 00:49:34,112 --> 00:49:35,875 We had a war. We forgot the hero. 1046 00:49:35,914 --> 00:49:38,747 You can't have a war and not have a hero. 1047 00:49:38,783 --> 00:49:40,148 It's like we sent a Christmas card... 1048 00:49:40,184 --> 00:49:41,742 and left out the... What do you call it? 1049 00:49:41,786 --> 00:49:43,083 - Fruitcake. - There you go. 1050 00:49:43,121 --> 00:49:45,089 Let's work. 1051 00:49:45,123 --> 00:49:47,216 We got a guy who's left behind, so... 1052 00:49:47,258 --> 00:49:49,852 This is terrific. This is lucky this happened. 1053 00:49:49,894 --> 00:49:51,862 He was left behind, just discarded... 1054 00:49:51,896 --> 00:49:55,093 like an old shoe. 1055 00:49:55,133 --> 00:49:56,361 That's good. 1056 00:49:56,401 --> 00:49:58,130 What's good? What did I say? 1057 00:49:58,169 --> 00:49:59,397 - Shoe. - Old shoe? 1058 00:49:59,437 --> 00:50:00,699 It's just instinct. 1059 00:50:02,607 --> 00:50:04,802 Get me the Pentagon... 1060 00:50:04,842 --> 00:50:08,471 a list of people in all military special programs. 1061 00:50:08,513 --> 00:50:10,538 "Left behind like an old shoe." That is good. 1062 00:50:11,749 --> 00:50:13,683 I want to talk to Johnny. 1063 00:50:17,388 --> 00:50:18,616 What is it? 1064 00:50:18,656 --> 00:50:21,557 The war is over. 1065 00:50:21,593 --> 00:50:23,857 We're going to need a new song. 1066 00:50:23,895 --> 00:50:26,625 It should be a song about a shiny shoe... 1067 00:50:26,664 --> 00:50:29,224 a black patent shoe... 1068 00:50:29,267 --> 00:50:31,064 a good old shoe. 1069 00:50:31,102 --> 00:50:33,866 I was on my way to get drunk. 1070 00:50:33,905 --> 00:50:38,035 You get drunk, but I need a good old shoe song. 1071 00:50:38,076 --> 00:50:39,509 A ballad of loss... 1072 00:50:40,845 --> 00:50:43,211 - Want to help me? - Redemption. 1073 00:50:43,247 --> 00:50:46,080 Loss and redemption is very good. 1074 00:50:46,117 --> 00:50:49,314 Shit. What key do you want it in? 1075 00:50:49,354 --> 00:50:50,821 I don't know keys. 1076 00:50:51,990 --> 00:50:55,824 People here are depressed because the war just ended. 1077 00:50:55,860 --> 00:50:57,987 Please give me a new song. 1078 00:50:58,029 --> 00:50:59,826 I got him. 1079 00:50:59,864 --> 00:51:01,991 King, Pentagon. 1080 00:51:02,033 --> 00:51:03,557 Take it. 1081 00:51:03,601 --> 00:51:07,230 I need a list of military special programs. 1082 00:51:07,271 --> 00:51:09,671 Bottom of the ninth. 1083 00:51:09,707 --> 00:51:11,174 They don't know who they're playing with. 1084 00:51:12,777 --> 00:51:14,836 They don't shut down our picture. 1085 00:51:14,879 --> 00:51:16,710 You people gonna be long? 1086 00:51:16,748 --> 00:51:18,648 Otherwise, I'll put away the equipment. 1087 00:51:18,683 --> 00:51:19,911 I don't know what I'm doing. 1088 00:51:19,951 --> 00:51:22,715 I think I'm supposed to be writing a song. 1089 00:51:22,754 --> 00:51:24,187 What kind of song? 1090 00:51:24,222 --> 00:51:26,554 Is there anybody there named... 1091 00:51:26,591 --> 00:51:28,525 Schumann? 1092 00:51:28,559 --> 00:51:30,857 - Schuster? - Schumacher. 1093 00:51:30,895 --> 00:51:32,157 I got a great idea. 1094 00:51:33,898 --> 00:51:35,832 Old shoe, new shoe. 1095 00:51:37,635 --> 00:51:39,660 Daddy had a hound dog... 1096 00:51:41,205 --> 00:51:42,900 used to call him Blue. 1097 00:51:45,710 --> 00:51:48,372 Follow me 'round... 1098 00:51:48,413 --> 00:51:50,973 stick to me like glue. 1099 00:51:54,986 --> 00:51:57,921 His favorite thing to play with... 1100 00:51:57,955 --> 00:52:00,014 used to be a good ol' shoe. 1101 00:52:00,058 --> 00:52:02,117 Wait a minute. Used to be. 1102 00:52:02,160 --> 00:52:03,855 You hit that 16-16. 1103 00:52:03,895 --> 00:52:05,886 Well, I wish I had a woman... 1104 00:52:07,131 --> 00:52:09,190 who was half as good and true. 1105 00:52:12,203 --> 00:52:14,694 Anybody here know Morse code? 1106 00:52:14,739 --> 00:52:16,070 What you gonna do? 1107 00:52:16,107 --> 00:52:17,438 Give me the fax. 1108 00:52:18,643 --> 00:52:20,611 Sergeant William Schumann, U.S. Army... 1109 00:52:20,645 --> 00:52:24,581 serial number 2131284262. 1110 00:52:25,850 --> 00:52:27,283 Good ol' shoe... 1111 00:52:27,318 --> 00:52:28,580 Here's the deal. 1112 00:52:29,921 --> 00:52:31,855 Good OI' Shoe. 1113 00:52:34,192 --> 00:52:35,853 Whatever you walk in... 1114 00:52:35,893 --> 00:52:37,485 he will get you through. 1115 00:52:37,528 --> 00:52:40,520 He's in a sweater... 1116 00:52:40,565 --> 00:52:42,157 and he's... 1117 00:52:42,200 --> 00:52:45,192 We drop him behind enemy lines. 1118 00:52:45,236 --> 00:52:46,794 He's trapped. 1119 00:52:46,838 --> 00:52:48,271 The sweater. 1120 00:52:48,306 --> 00:52:50,103 - In the sweater. - Good. 1121 00:52:51,342 --> 00:52:56,245 Is there a way we can make it sound old and scratchy... 1122 00:52:56,280 --> 00:52:57,975 with, like, a hiss? 1123 00:53:03,121 --> 00:53:04,418 With an old label. 1124 00:53:04,455 --> 00:53:05,922 I see where you're going. 1125 00:53:11,596 --> 00:53:13,791 Stand up straight and tall... 1126 00:53:13,831 --> 00:53:15,696 the way he taught you to. 1127 00:53:15,733 --> 00:53:17,496 I'll write a speech. 1128 00:53:19,203 --> 00:53:21,296 I'll help you with the speech. 1129 00:53:21,339 --> 00:53:24,206 The president reveals that William Schumann... 1130 00:53:26,444 --> 00:53:29,845 was trapped behind enemy lines. 1131 00:53:29,881 --> 00:53:31,815 This is good. 1132 00:53:31,849 --> 00:53:33,646 Heartfelt. 1133 00:53:33,684 --> 00:53:34,946 Touching. 1134 00:53:36,254 --> 00:53:37,516 People will weep. 1135 00:53:38,689 --> 00:53:41,283 Soul of a good ol' shoe. 1136 00:53:44,028 --> 00:53:46,292 He might even get to heaven... 1137 00:53:46,330 --> 00:53:49,390 on the soul of his good ol'... 1138 00:53:49,433 --> 00:53:52,095 shoe. 1139 00:53:56,641 --> 00:53:58,666 Here's the president's speech. 1140 00:53:58,709 --> 00:54:00,734 Put this in the Library of Congress. 1141 00:54:00,778 --> 00:54:02,473 Folk music section, 1930. 1142 00:54:02,513 --> 00:54:04,447 Right away, please. 1143 00:54:04,482 --> 00:54:07,212 Get it in the Library of Congress now. 1144 00:54:08,920 --> 00:54:11,184 Oh, God. 1145 00:54:11,222 --> 00:54:13,213 Who's seeing the CBS guy tonight? 1146 00:54:14,458 --> 00:54:17,757 Tonight, you remember some song from the folk song days... 1147 00:54:17,795 --> 00:54:19,160 about a good old shoe. 1148 00:54:19,197 --> 00:54:20,528 Tonight? 1149 00:54:20,565 --> 00:54:23,295 You're with him watching the president's speech... 1150 00:54:23,334 --> 00:54:24,596 What if he's busy? 1151 00:54:24,635 --> 00:54:27,331 - Lure him. - What are you saying? 1152 00:54:27,371 --> 00:54:30,534 I don't have to be your confessor, darling. 1153 00:54:30,575 --> 00:54:33,135 Tell him you've got info on the sex scandal... 1154 00:54:33,177 --> 00:54:34,474 it's on your conscience. 1155 00:54:34,512 --> 00:54:36,343 He'll drop whatever he's doing. 1156 00:54:37,582 --> 00:54:39,140 This is a shitty business. 1157 00:54:39,183 --> 00:54:41,344 It needs no ghost from the grave to tell us that... 1158 00:54:41,385 --> 00:54:43,819 but, Lord willing, eight days from now... 1159 00:54:43,855 --> 00:54:46,551 I'm gonna take you into the second term. 1160 00:54:46,591 --> 00:54:47,990 Wait till you hear the speech. 1161 00:54:48,025 --> 00:54:49,959 The 303 speech. Great. 1162 00:54:49,994 --> 00:54:51,791 Where's that Fad King? 1163 00:54:51,829 --> 00:54:53,057 I'll get him. 1164 00:54:53,097 --> 00:54:54,428 Could we go now? 1165 00:54:54,465 --> 00:54:56,899 A good plan today is better than a perfect plan tomorrow. 1166 00:54:56,934 --> 00:54:59,232 How are they doing on Sergeant Schumann? 1167 00:54:59,270 --> 00:55:01,067 They're working on him, they're finding him. 1168 00:55:01,105 --> 00:55:02,697 Good. It's working. 1169 00:55:02,740 --> 00:55:05,265 It's all happening. It's taking place around us. 1170 00:55:05,309 --> 00:55:09,006 It is in the works. It is being addressed. 1171 00:55:09,046 --> 00:55:10,343 We are being proactive. 1172 00:55:10,381 --> 00:55:13,544 We are going out with what may be the finest example... 1173 00:55:13,584 --> 00:55:16,314 Get me an update on the army, the Pentagon. 1174 00:55:16,354 --> 00:55:17,878 Get this guy Schumann. 1175 00:55:17,922 --> 00:55:19,287 Have him standing by. 1176 00:55:19,323 --> 00:55:23,521 I gotta tell you, I see a lot of glum faces. 1177 00:55:23,561 --> 00:55:25,085 Please don't be disconsolate. 1178 00:55:25,129 --> 00:55:28,394 This is politics at its finest. 1179 00:55:28,432 --> 00:55:31,492 This is where the rubber meets the road. 1180 00:55:31,535 --> 00:55:33,765 We've got a leader going out tonight... 1181 00:55:33,804 --> 00:55:35,465 to 95 million American homes. 1182 00:55:35,506 --> 00:55:37,235 He's gonna turn this thing around. 1183 00:55:37,275 --> 00:55:39,038 You think this is tough? 1184 00:55:39,076 --> 00:55:41,943 I was 4 months into production on The Song of Solomon... 1185 00:55:41,979 --> 00:55:43,537 found out I didn't have the rights. 1186 00:55:43,581 --> 00:55:45,173 Turn it up. It's our spot. 1187 00:55:45,216 --> 00:55:48,447 Tough? This is nothing. 1188 00:55:48,486 --> 00:55:51,717 Will you look at that shit? 1189 00:55:52,924 --> 00:55:55,290 'Cause you don't change horses in midstream. 1190 00:55:57,662 --> 00:56:00,096 Don't change horses. 1191 00:56:00,131 --> 00:56:01,530 This speech is good. 1192 00:56:01,565 --> 00:56:03,760 We're kinda locked into it, Mr. President. 1193 00:56:05,403 --> 00:56:07,530 For the future of our families... 1194 00:56:07,571 --> 00:56:09,698 The music. Where did they get that? 1195 00:56:13,678 --> 00:56:16,010 - Pain in the ass. - What? 1196 00:56:18,249 --> 00:56:20,717 He won't do the speech. 1197 00:56:20,751 --> 00:56:22,810 What do you mean? 1198 00:56:22,853 --> 00:56:24,684 What choice does he have? 1199 00:56:24,722 --> 00:56:26,690 He won't do the speech? 1200 00:56:26,724 --> 00:56:28,157 He says it's corny. 1201 00:56:28,192 --> 00:56:30,490 It's what? It's corny? 1202 00:56:31,762 --> 00:56:33,059 Of course it's corny. 1203 00:56:33,097 --> 00:56:35,759 We wouldn't have him say it if it wasn't. 1204 00:56:35,800 --> 00:56:37,233 It's not a question. 1205 00:56:37,268 --> 00:56:38,997 This is the center for rest of the thing. 1206 00:56:39,036 --> 00:56:40,264 Don't tell me it's corny. 1207 00:56:40,304 --> 00:56:42,738 We're locked into the speech, right? 1208 00:56:42,773 --> 00:56:44,001 We're locked in. 1209 00:56:44,041 --> 00:56:45,941 We are playing way past this. 1210 00:56:45,977 --> 00:56:47,308 We are past this. 1211 00:56:49,146 --> 00:56:50,773 This is what I need. 1212 00:56:50,815 --> 00:56:54,444 Get me 30 secretaries and put them in an office now. 1213 00:56:55,453 --> 00:56:57,478 I need to see the president. 1214 00:56:57,521 --> 00:56:59,352 I need 5 minutes. 1215 00:56:59,390 --> 00:57:01,324 Know what this reminds me of? 1216 00:57:01,359 --> 00:57:04,419 Years ago, when I first went out to Hollywood... 1217 00:57:04,462 --> 00:57:05,690 they said, "It's too theatrical." 1218 00:57:05,730 --> 00:57:08,824 I was from the theater. Everything was over their heads. 1219 00:57:08,866 --> 00:57:10,197 He thinks it's corny. 1220 00:57:10,234 --> 00:57:11,895 Don't tell me it's corny. 1221 00:57:11,936 --> 00:57:13,403 Tell him I'm comin'. 1222 00:57:13,437 --> 00:57:17,464 My fellow Americans, I thank a merciful God... 1223 00:57:17,508 --> 00:57:20,272 and I am sure each and every one of us... 1224 00:57:20,311 --> 00:57:22,245 will thank that Supreme Power... 1225 00:57:22,279 --> 00:57:25,510 whatever we conceive that power to be... 1226 00:57:25,549 --> 00:57:28,040 that peace is at hand. 1227 00:57:28,085 --> 00:57:31,748 The threat of nuclear terrorism has been quelled. 1228 00:57:31,789 --> 00:57:34,952 Mr. President, I'm using a little more projection... 1229 00:57:34,992 --> 00:57:38,621 because I think this speech needs a little umph. 1230 00:57:40,498 --> 00:57:41,795 Bear with me. 1231 00:57:43,300 --> 00:57:44,892 Beautiful. 1232 00:57:45,903 --> 00:57:47,530 Thank you so much. 1233 00:57:59,950 --> 00:58:02,111 That was so moving. 1234 00:58:02,153 --> 00:58:03,450 Thank you so much. 1235 00:58:03,487 --> 00:58:04,749 Thank you. 1236 00:58:10,995 --> 00:58:14,260 I felt very much at home in there. 1237 00:58:14,298 --> 00:58:15,890 Simple quirk of fate. 1238 00:58:15,933 --> 00:58:17,491 I could have gone this way. 1239 00:58:17,535 --> 00:58:18,934 It's all a change in wardrobe. 1240 00:58:20,137 --> 00:58:21,570 Was it too much? 1241 00:58:21,605 --> 00:58:24,597 I'll tell you. 1242 00:58:24,642 --> 00:58:25,904 You did it. 1243 00:58:26,977 --> 00:58:28,274 You jumped in there... 1244 00:58:28,312 --> 00:58:30,177 and saved the thing when the thing needed saving. 1245 00:58:30,214 --> 00:58:32,205 It wasn't too much? 1246 00:58:32,249 --> 00:58:34,080 Personally? 1247 00:58:34,118 --> 00:58:35,346 Maybe it was. 1248 00:58:35,386 --> 00:58:38,617 The president doesn't have to say it that way. 1249 00:58:38,656 --> 00:58:40,123 It's like Plato once said. 1250 00:58:40,157 --> 00:58:41,784 It doesn't matter how you get there... 1251 00:58:41,826 --> 00:58:43,088 as long as you get there. 1252 00:58:43,127 --> 00:58:44,389 He said that? 1253 00:58:44,428 --> 00:58:46,726 What is it exactly you do for the president? 1254 00:58:46,764 --> 00:58:49,858 My fellow Americans, I thank a merciful God... 1255 00:58:49,900 --> 00:58:53,836 and I'm sure all of us will thank that Supreme Power... 1256 00:58:53,871 --> 00:58:56,567 whatever we conceive that power to be... 1257 00:58:56,607 --> 00:58:59,167 that peace is at hand. 1258 00:59:03,914 --> 00:59:06,712 The threat of nuclear terrorism has been quelled. 1259 00:59:06,750 --> 00:59:10,242 We are in contact with the Albanian premier... 1260 00:59:10,287 --> 00:59:11,754 who assures me... 1261 00:59:11,789 --> 00:59:14,019 and this government credits his assurances... 1262 00:59:14,058 --> 00:59:16,549 his country does not wish us ill... 1263 00:59:16,594 --> 00:59:17,822 Know any Latin? 1264 00:59:17,862 --> 00:59:19,420 I, Claudius. That's what I know. 1265 00:59:19,463 --> 00:59:23,058 I need a Latin motto for the patch. 1266 00:59:23,100 --> 00:59:24,727 The 303 patch. 1267 00:59:24,768 --> 00:59:28,431 ... but by a designation number, 303. 1268 00:59:28,472 --> 00:59:32,704 A member was left behind what were then enemy lines. 1269 00:59:32,743 --> 00:59:36,907 I can only say to those family members of Group 303... 1270 00:59:36,947 --> 00:59:39,643 whose members are, I know as I speak... 1271 00:59:39,683 --> 00:59:41,082 gathering to comfort you. 1272 00:59:41,118 --> 00:59:43,586 To the parents of the missing man... 1273 00:59:43,621 --> 00:59:45,452 no effort will be spared... 1274 00:59:45,489 --> 00:59:49,118 to find this brave man and bring him home. 1275 00:59:49,160 --> 00:59:52,596 We'vejust received this photograph of Schumann... 1276 00:59:52,630 --> 00:59:55,724 held by a dissident group of Albanian terrorists. 1277 00:59:55,766 --> 00:59:58,894 I don't know how many of you know Morse code... 1278 00:59:58,936 --> 01:00:01,928 but could you bring the camera closer? 1279 01:00:01,972 --> 01:00:06,033 You'll see his sweater is worn. 1280 01:00:06,076 --> 01:00:08,544 It has been unraveled in places. 1281 01:00:08,579 --> 01:00:10,308 Those places form dashes and dots... 1282 01:00:10,347 --> 01:00:15,148 and those dots spell out a message in Morse code. 1283 01:00:15,186 --> 01:00:17,916 That message is, "Courage, Mom." 1284 01:00:20,391 --> 01:00:21,858 He got the message through. 1285 01:00:23,827 --> 01:00:25,727 Not bad for government work. 1286 01:00:25,763 --> 01:00:27,458 Having a good time? 1287 01:00:27,498 --> 01:00:29,762 Haven't had this much fun since live TV. 1288 01:00:29,800 --> 01:00:32,462 To the men and women of Unit 303... 1289 01:00:32,503 --> 01:00:34,971 to my fellow citizens, I say, "Courage, Mom." 1290 01:00:35,005 --> 01:00:38,964 I have informed Albania that we will not rest... 1291 01:00:39,009 --> 01:00:40,840 until the safe return of Sergeant Schumann. 1292 01:00:40,878 --> 01:00:45,076 I'm told his unit mates gave him the nickname "Old Shoe." 1293 01:00:45,115 --> 01:00:49,142 Wasn't there a folk song called "Old Shoe?" 1294 01:00:49,186 --> 01:00:52,280 Do you remember that? Something like... 1295 01:00:52,323 --> 01:00:55,315 I don't know. I can vaguely remember it. 1296 01:00:55,359 --> 01:00:57,589 Do you know what I'm talking about? 1297 01:00:59,897 --> 01:01:01,558 Thank you, ladies and gentlemen. 1298 01:01:01,599 --> 01:01:03,658 Good night and God bless. 1299 01:01:03,701 --> 01:01:08,104 Trump that, Senator Neal, you Howdy-Doody-looking vontz. 1300 01:01:08,138 --> 01:01:11,107 As we reported earlier, U.S. Serviceman Willie Schumann... 1301 01:01:11,141 --> 01:01:12,870 remains missing behind enemy lines... 1302 01:01:12,910 --> 01:01:15,276 It's all thinking ahead. 1303 01:01:15,312 --> 01:01:16,802 That's what producing is. 1304 01:01:16,847 --> 01:01:18,337 It's like being a plumber. 1305 01:01:20,184 --> 01:01:22,709 Do your job right, nobody should notice. 1306 01:01:22,753 --> 01:01:25,654 When you fuck up, everything gets full of shit. 1307 01:01:25,689 --> 01:01:27,418 ... symbol of the military team... 1308 01:01:27,458 --> 01:01:30,427 Sergeant William Schumann, the "Old Shoe." 1309 01:01:30,461 --> 01:01:33,123 Let's line up the president for the Peace Prize. 1310 01:01:33,163 --> 01:01:35,063 Our job ends on election day. 1311 01:01:35,099 --> 01:01:36,828 Come on. 1312 01:01:36,867 --> 01:01:40,030 Just for the symmetry of the thing? 1313 01:01:40,070 --> 01:01:41,332 That's right. 1314 01:01:41,372 --> 01:01:43,135 If Kissinger can win the Peace Prize... 1315 01:01:43,173 --> 01:01:46,438 I wouldn't be surprised if I'd won the Preakness. 1316 01:01:46,477 --> 01:01:50,004 But our guy did bring peace. 1317 01:01:50,047 --> 01:01:51,571 But there wasn't a war. 1318 01:01:51,615 --> 01:01:54,175 All the greater accomplishment. 1319 01:02:11,302 --> 01:02:13,770 Where's the money... 1320 01:02:13,804 --> 01:02:16,602 where's the tie-in with throwing away shoes? 1321 01:02:16,640 --> 01:02:18,335 Who pays you for that? 1322 01:02:18,375 --> 01:02:20,707 You throw away shoes. What are you gonna do? 1323 01:02:20,744 --> 01:02:22,211 Buy new ones. 1324 01:02:22,246 --> 01:02:24,441 We have some powerful new friends... 1325 01:02:24,481 --> 01:02:27,416 at the International Association of Shoe Manufacturers. 1326 01:02:27,451 --> 01:02:29,112 You guys sure get around. 1327 01:02:29,153 --> 01:02:31,280 Fad King is my hero. Want to go first? 1328 01:02:31,322 --> 01:02:33,085 Sure. 1329 01:02:33,123 --> 01:02:35,683 Attaboy. 1330 01:02:35,726 --> 01:02:37,387 History, Connie. 1331 01:02:39,363 --> 01:02:40,853 Those are ratty shoes. 1332 01:02:40,898 --> 01:02:43,128 That's why we're flinging them away. 1333 01:02:43,167 --> 01:02:46,159 You want to try some? Go ahead. 1334 01:02:46,203 --> 01:02:47,830 Attaboy. 1335 01:02:47,871 --> 01:02:49,736 Do it again. 1336 01:02:49,773 --> 01:02:51,536 Go ahead. Have a ball. 1337 01:02:55,145 --> 01:02:57,238 Watch this. 1338 01:03:00,484 --> 01:03:02,042 Go on, tell your friends. 1339 01:03:04,688 --> 01:03:06,519 This is interesting. 1340 01:03:06,557 --> 01:03:10,425 I havejust been handed this. Something just discovered. 1341 01:03:10,461 --> 01:03:14,158 A 1930s recording, part of the folk song collection... 1342 01:03:14,198 --> 01:03:15,722 Of the Library of Congress... 1343 01:03:15,766 --> 01:03:19,133 and a fitting song, if I may say so, about Shoe. 1344 01:03:19,169 --> 01:03:20,966 Schumann is the military soldier... 1345 01:03:21,004 --> 01:03:22,904 who's been left behind enemy lines... 1346 01:03:31,515 --> 01:03:33,346 Jim, can I get a word with you? 1347 01:03:33,384 --> 01:03:35,477 Would you like to comment on Albania? 1348 01:03:37,121 --> 01:03:39,453 There is one thing I'd like to say. 1349 01:03:39,490 --> 01:03:43,392 This is to the Albanians that have this man. 1350 01:03:43,427 --> 01:03:46,726 I mean this from the bottom of my heart as one of your race. 1351 01:03:49,733 --> 01:03:51,928 I didn't know Jim Belushi was Albanian. 1352 01:03:58,375 --> 01:04:00,206 The search for Willie Schumann continues... 1353 01:04:30,174 --> 01:04:32,574 As soon as we land, I want a reflexologist. 1354 01:04:32,609 --> 01:04:33,871 Male or female? 1355 01:04:33,911 --> 01:04:35,538 The White House wants to know about... 1356 01:04:35,579 --> 01:04:36,841 the Congressional Medal of Honor. 1357 01:04:36,880 --> 01:04:38,438 - What about it? - For Schumann. 1358 01:04:38,482 --> 01:04:41,076 Wait a minute. We got 86% in favor. 1359 01:04:41,118 --> 01:04:44,383 We bring him back tomorrow, charts don't go down. 1360 01:04:44,421 --> 01:04:46,013 I don't want to tell them how to do their business... 1361 01:04:46,056 --> 01:04:47,523 but why don't they do it after the election? 1362 01:04:47,558 --> 01:04:49,788 Makes more sense, and it'll help them more. 1363 01:04:49,827 --> 01:04:51,852 When are you bringing him back? 1364 01:04:51,895 --> 01:04:53,863 King, show him the thing. 1365 01:04:53,897 --> 01:04:56,730 - It's not done yet. - Show it to him. 1366 01:04:56,767 --> 01:05:00,396 Talk about enlarging the market. Tell him. 1367 01:05:00,437 --> 01:05:02,962 Here it is. Artist's rendering of the memorial. 1368 01:05:03,006 --> 01:05:04,337 The memorial? 1369 01:05:04,374 --> 01:05:06,934 That's the memorial of the fallen. 1370 01:05:06,977 --> 01:05:08,342 Of the Albanian campaign. 1371 01:05:08,378 --> 01:05:10,403 - Lovely. - It's better than lovely. 1372 01:05:10,447 --> 01:05:12,506 This guy made a deal with Governor Kneehigh... 1373 01:05:12,549 --> 01:05:14,210 Senator Leahy. 1374 01:05:14,251 --> 01:05:16,776 You should see the granite you have to put in this thing. 1375 01:05:16,820 --> 01:05:18,754 Got a site picked out and everything. 1376 01:05:18,789 --> 01:05:20,757 The beauty part is... 1377 01:05:20,791 --> 01:05:22,691 guess who retains the merchandising rights. 1378 01:05:22,726 --> 01:05:24,387 Show him the clock? 1379 01:05:24,428 --> 01:05:26,191 Got it as a clock. 1380 01:05:26,230 --> 01:05:27,891 Lovely. 1381 01:05:27,931 --> 01:05:30,092 - Let's go. - When's Schumann coming back? 1382 01:05:30,133 --> 01:05:31,430 Getting him right now. 1383 01:05:31,468 --> 01:05:33,868 I need his neck size. 1384 01:05:33,904 --> 01:05:35,166 I think it's 171l2. 1385 01:05:35,205 --> 01:05:37,400 Thinking 171l2 is not good enough. 1386 01:05:37,441 --> 01:05:40,035 I'm an artist, not a factory worker. 1387 01:05:40,077 --> 01:05:42,204 What did he eat behind enemy lines? 1388 01:05:42,246 --> 01:05:43,838 Birds, snakes. 1389 01:05:43,881 --> 01:05:46,850 Bullshit. He ate tiny cheeseburgers in tin foil. 1390 01:05:46,884 --> 01:05:48,283 Pull a string, they heat themselves. 1391 01:05:48,318 --> 01:05:50,286 We call Burger King, Johnny Rockets. 1392 01:05:50,320 --> 01:05:52,788 We get the Shoe Burger with cheese and 303 sauce... 1393 01:05:52,823 --> 01:05:55,519 "Behind enemy lines or anytime." 1394 01:05:55,559 --> 01:05:57,026 That's the slogan. 1395 01:05:57,060 --> 01:05:59,893 I got the copyright on the Albanian kitten thing. 1396 01:05:59,930 --> 01:06:02,057 I'm gonna call Nike, get Rodman to dye his hair. 1397 01:06:02,099 --> 01:06:03,999 We'll have a sneaker... "Air Leopard." 1398 01:06:07,771 --> 01:06:09,534 ... a high school basketball game last night... 1399 01:06:09,573 --> 01:06:12,269 between Montgomery Bell and Blair Park. 1400 01:06:12,309 --> 01:06:13,776 Students, during the game... 1401 01:06:13,810 --> 01:06:16,438 in spontaneous moment of sheer patriotism... 1402 01:06:16,480 --> 01:06:19,745 threw their tennis shoes on the court by the hundreds, 1403 01:06:19,783 --> 01:06:21,307 just for the Old Shoe. 1404 01:06:21,351 --> 01:06:24,115 Bring him back. William Schumann... 1405 01:06:24,154 --> 01:06:26,122 There's no business like it. 1406 01:06:26,156 --> 01:06:28,750 Demonstrations are springing up all over the country... 1407 01:06:28,792 --> 01:06:31,522 as Americans show their patriotism. 1408 01:06:31,562 --> 01:06:34,759 You ought to get them to run that inaugural speech by me. 1409 01:06:34,798 --> 01:06:36,698 Inaugural speech? I don't know. 1410 01:06:36,733 --> 01:06:39,065 The White House staff won't give up that one. 1411 01:06:39,102 --> 01:06:43,129 Come on. Let me close out the thing in style. 1412 01:06:43,173 --> 01:06:45,266 I've come to feel it's my thing. 1413 01:06:45,309 --> 01:06:48,801 You take ajob, and many times, it's just ajob... 1414 01:06:50,814 --> 01:06:52,441 Hell of a ride. 1415 01:06:52,482 --> 01:06:54,040 Isn't it? 1416 01:06:54,084 --> 01:06:55,642 You take the bitter with the sweet... 1417 01:06:55,686 --> 01:06:57,381 or the sweet with the bitter. 1418 01:06:57,421 --> 01:06:58,718 What's that expression? 1419 01:07:01,992 --> 01:07:05,393 ... feeling good about the economy. 1420 01:07:05,429 --> 01:07:07,363 That's why we're voting for the president, Ed. 1421 01:07:07,397 --> 01:07:08,694 What do you think? 1422 01:07:08,732 --> 01:07:13,135 Bob, my mind wasn't 100% made up, but now it is. 1423 01:07:13,170 --> 01:07:16,833 Don't go changing horses in midstream. 1424 01:07:18,408 --> 01:07:20,103 Absolutely. 1425 01:07:20,143 --> 01:07:23,044 Who needs surprises these days? 1426 01:07:23,080 --> 01:07:24,570 For an economy you can rely on... 1427 01:07:24,615 --> 01:07:26,378 Fucking amateurs. 1428 01:07:28,051 --> 01:07:31,578 Pity of it is, two more days, and we bring it back home. 1429 01:07:31,622 --> 01:07:32,714 Knock wood. 1430 01:07:33,490 --> 01:07:34,980 Who's gonna know? 1431 01:07:35,826 --> 01:07:37,817 Who's gonna know what we did? 1432 01:07:39,096 --> 01:07:40,654 Pride of ajob well done, Stan. 1433 01:07:40,697 --> 01:07:43,928 It's the pride of ajob well done, but it's more. 1434 01:07:45,602 --> 01:07:48,594 It's the gratitude of your party and your president, right? 1435 01:07:49,439 --> 01:07:51,930 - Is that the thing? - Indeed it is. 1436 01:07:54,244 --> 01:07:57,338 Dean City, Oklahoma. Army special programs. 1437 01:07:57,381 --> 01:07:59,076 Tell 'em to bring Schumann to the plane. 1438 01:07:59,116 --> 01:08:01,550 We'll bring him back and stash him in the hospital. 1439 01:08:01,585 --> 01:08:04,679 Call the plane. Tell me where to pick him up. 1440 01:08:04,721 --> 01:08:06,746 I bet you're good at chess. 1441 01:08:07,958 --> 01:08:10,483 I would be, I could remember how all the pieces move. 1442 01:08:11,161 --> 01:08:12,560 We'll call you. 1443 01:08:13,664 --> 01:08:18,601 I'll do the same in His great name... 1444 01:08:18,635 --> 01:08:21,604 if you have courage, Mom. 1445 01:08:22,773 --> 01:08:26,903 I can always feel your love. 1446 01:08:28,245 --> 01:08:30,941 Send, and I'll receive. 1447 01:08:33,083 --> 01:08:35,551 Units of 303, the Defense Department... 1448 01:08:35,585 --> 01:08:37,610 confirmed early this morning, Albanian time... 1449 01:08:37,654 --> 01:08:41,488 stormed the mountain hideaway near the city of... 1450 01:08:41,525 --> 01:08:44,426 freeing a tired but happy William Schumann. 1451 01:08:44,461 --> 01:08:46,691 A high White House source confirms... 1452 01:08:46,730 --> 01:08:49,426 that he's expected in Washington tomorrow morning. 1453 01:08:49,466 --> 01:08:50,728 How's that? 1454 01:08:57,574 --> 01:08:59,439 When we touch down tomorrow... 1455 01:08:59,476 --> 01:09:01,103 Big Bird meets Schumann at the airport? 1456 01:09:01,144 --> 01:09:03,942 Big mistake. You got to bring him in by stages. 1457 01:09:03,980 --> 01:09:06,881 Big mistake to reveal Schumann before the election. 1458 01:09:06,917 --> 01:09:08,179 How so? 1459 01:09:08,218 --> 01:09:10,812 Sweetheart, Schumann is the shark. 1460 01:09:10,854 --> 01:09:12,822 Schumann is Jaws. 1461 01:09:12,856 --> 01:09:15,256 You have to tease 'em. 1462 01:09:15,292 --> 01:09:18,625 You don't put Jaws in the first reel of the movie. 1463 01:09:18,662 --> 01:09:20,630 It's the contract, sweetheart. 1464 01:09:20,664 --> 01:09:23,462 The contract with the election, whether they know it or not... 1465 01:09:23,500 --> 01:09:25,468 is vote for me Tuesday... 1466 01:09:25,502 --> 01:09:27,766 Wednesday, I will produce Schumann. 1467 01:09:27,804 --> 01:09:29,931 That's what they're paying their seven bucks for. 1468 01:09:29,973 --> 01:09:31,531 Know what I mean? 1469 01:09:31,575 --> 01:09:33,338 Whatever. 1470 01:09:33,376 --> 01:09:34,843 Everybody's gotta learn. 1471 01:09:34,878 --> 01:09:36,402 Any business. 1472 01:09:38,415 --> 01:09:39,677 You take the fruit of 40 years... 1473 01:09:39,716 --> 01:09:41,980 hard lessons, mistakes, and you call it wisdom. 1474 01:09:42,018 --> 01:09:43,246 That's the truth. 1475 01:09:43,286 --> 01:09:45,720 End of the day, just when you know something... 1476 01:09:45,756 --> 01:09:47,314 time to go home. 1477 01:09:47,357 --> 01:09:49,621 You got decades in you now. 1478 01:09:49,659 --> 01:09:51,786 You got decades left in you. 1479 01:09:51,828 --> 01:09:52,988 Yeah, but... 1480 01:09:55,098 --> 01:09:56,429 What could I do to top this? 1481 01:09:58,168 --> 01:10:02,036 The 37th Psalm. 1482 01:10:02,072 --> 01:10:06,771 I'll do the same in His great name... 1483 01:10:06,810 --> 01:10:09,608 if you have courage, Mom. 1484 01:10:09,646 --> 01:10:12,479 You see her? That was real tears. 1485 01:10:12,516 --> 01:10:14,746 We were gonna give her those drops. 1486 01:10:14,785 --> 01:10:16,912 - She cried. - Really? 1487 01:10:16,953 --> 01:10:19,387 - She cried real. - It looks it. 1488 01:10:19,422 --> 01:10:21,890 Pray for me... 1489 01:10:21,925 --> 01:10:24,257 and the USA. 1490 01:10:24,294 --> 01:10:27,695 Pray they never use the bomb. 1491 01:10:29,466 --> 01:10:31,627 What are you going to do after this? 1492 01:10:31,668 --> 01:10:33,295 They owe you big. 1493 01:10:33,336 --> 01:10:35,770 Ambassador to this or that, whatever. 1494 01:10:35,806 --> 01:10:37,273 Ambassador to what? 1495 01:10:37,307 --> 01:10:39,138 I don't even like to go to Brentwood. 1496 01:10:41,711 --> 01:10:43,736 That's what I want. 1497 01:10:43,780 --> 01:10:45,247 That's my reward. 1498 01:10:45,282 --> 01:10:46,510 That's the payoff. 1499 01:10:46,550 --> 01:10:48,848 You want to go to the Inaugural? 1500 01:10:48,885 --> 01:10:51,581 Might if I was asked. 1501 01:11:13,443 --> 01:11:16,105 This here, Schumann and us... 1502 01:11:16,146 --> 01:11:18,580 Look at that. King Kong and the trainers. 1503 01:11:18,615 --> 01:11:20,549 This is it. 1504 01:11:22,819 --> 01:11:25,652 I'm standing with this picture of Sergeant Willie Schumann. 1505 01:11:25,689 --> 01:11:29,489 He's become known to Americans simply as the Old Shoe... 1506 01:11:29,526 --> 01:11:31,619 This is gonna be a masterpiece. 1507 01:11:31,661 --> 01:11:33,458 Giving them what they want. 1508 01:11:33,496 --> 01:11:37,091 ... his Group 303 and left behind in enemy territory. 1509 01:11:37,133 --> 01:11:39,601 Here at Andrews Air Force Base... 1510 01:11:39,636 --> 01:11:41,467 they prepare for the return of Willie Schumann. 1511 01:11:48,612 --> 01:11:51,979 Sergeant Schumann, if I may, welcome to history. 1512 01:11:52,015 --> 01:11:53,812 Sergeant Schumann, I'm Ames. 1513 01:11:53,850 --> 01:11:55,511 Somebody named Brean? 1514 01:11:55,552 --> 01:11:57,019 Right here. 1515 01:11:57,053 --> 01:11:58,748 Sign here for me. 1516 01:12:00,423 --> 01:12:02,755 Captain, you want to take her up? 1517 01:12:02,792 --> 01:12:04,191 There's heavy weather back east. 1518 01:12:04,227 --> 01:12:05,524 What do you think? 1519 01:12:05,562 --> 01:12:08,087 6 to 5 and pick 'em. You want to chance it? 1520 01:12:08,131 --> 01:12:10,258 If it'll fly, let's fly. People are waiting. 1521 01:12:16,006 --> 01:12:18,338 A child at the airport breaks through the ranks... 1522 01:12:18,375 --> 01:12:22,175 runs to Old Shoe, rubs meat on Schumann's cuff. 1523 01:12:22,212 --> 01:12:24,772 A little dog runs to it. The dog loves Schumann. 1524 01:12:24,814 --> 01:12:27,180 He is a perfect war hero. 1525 01:12:27,217 --> 01:12:28,616 Perfect. 1526 01:12:28,652 --> 01:12:30,517 You cast him. 1527 01:12:30,553 --> 01:12:32,214 All right. Book it up. 1528 01:12:35,425 --> 01:12:36,824 What's this? 1529 01:12:36,860 --> 01:12:38,555 Keys to the manacles. 1530 01:12:41,798 --> 01:12:43,629 Oh, my God. 1531 01:12:43,667 --> 01:12:45,567 Wait. 1532 01:12:53,243 --> 01:12:55,905 What is the trouble? 1533 01:12:55,946 --> 01:12:58,437 No trouble at all, ma'am. 1534 01:12:58,481 --> 01:13:00,346 Then why is he in chains? 1535 01:13:01,351 --> 01:13:03,376 He's in chains because he's a convict. 1536 01:13:04,621 --> 01:13:05,883 A convict? 1537 01:13:10,427 --> 01:13:11,519 How you doing? 1538 01:13:25,442 --> 01:13:26,636 Take a look. 1539 01:13:31,948 --> 01:13:34,712 When we asked for special programs... 1540 01:13:34,751 --> 01:13:36,446 they gave us special prisons. 1541 01:13:36,486 --> 01:13:38,579 Only a one-word difference. 1542 01:13:38,621 --> 01:13:41,351 - Has he been in jail long? - 12 years. 1543 01:13:41,391 --> 01:13:42,790 Does he have much longer to serve? 1544 01:13:44,894 --> 01:13:46,088 What did he do? 1545 01:13:46,129 --> 01:13:47,892 He raped a nun. 1546 01:13:49,366 --> 01:13:52,267 - And... - I don't want to know an "and." 1547 01:13:52,302 --> 01:13:53,269 Why is there an "and"? 1548 01:13:54,304 --> 01:13:57,467 He's fine as long as he gets his medications. 1549 01:13:57,507 --> 01:13:59,441 And if he doesn't? 1550 01:13:59,476 --> 01:14:00,773 He's not fine. 1551 01:14:04,014 --> 01:14:05,447 Up there, Captain. 1552 01:14:07,384 --> 01:14:09,147 You'd better get us to Washington. 1553 01:14:14,657 --> 01:14:15,919 How are ya? 1554 01:14:17,794 --> 01:14:19,284 Fine. 1555 01:14:29,406 --> 01:14:30,930 Gonna get me back tomorrow? 1556 01:14:30,974 --> 01:14:34,535 'Cause, you know, tomorrow they're having beans. 1557 01:14:34,577 --> 01:14:37,102 I need a readjustment. We have to rethink this. 1558 01:14:37,147 --> 01:14:38,546 Beans! 1559 01:14:38,581 --> 01:14:40,515 We're trying to do this thing. 1560 01:14:40,550 --> 01:14:43,986 As long as you get me back for the beans. 1561 01:14:44,020 --> 01:14:46,045 He's sicker than we thought. 1562 01:14:46,089 --> 01:14:49,718 Rush him under wraps to Walter Reed for tests. 1563 01:14:49,759 --> 01:14:52,956 If you're gonna keep me out, I'd like to go to church. 1564 01:14:52,996 --> 01:14:54,395 You know what I mean? 1565 01:14:55,932 --> 01:14:57,763 Are you very religious? 1566 01:15:02,205 --> 01:15:03,934 What have you done to me? 1567 01:15:06,443 --> 01:15:09,469 All combat takes place at night in the rain... 1568 01:15:09,512 --> 01:15:11,036 at the junction of four map segments. 1569 01:15:11,081 --> 01:15:12,480 What are you going to do? 1570 01:15:12,515 --> 01:15:14,483 He's fine as long as he gets his medication. 1571 01:15:14,517 --> 01:15:18,476 Speaking of that, we're gonna need lots of this. 1572 01:15:18,521 --> 01:15:20,352 Get on the phone and get it. 1573 01:15:20,390 --> 01:15:23,018 You people are looking at this wrong. 1574 01:15:23,059 --> 01:15:25,027 If you look at the back story... 1575 01:15:25,061 --> 01:15:27,154 the guy is coming back from combat and torture... 1576 01:15:27,197 --> 01:15:29,131 of course he's going to be a little fucked up. 1577 01:15:30,400 --> 01:15:31,833 He's gonna need help. 1578 01:15:31,868 --> 01:15:35,463 Anybody want a beer? 'Cause I could party. 1579 01:15:35,505 --> 01:15:37,370 I'm gonna need an ambulance. 1580 01:15:37,407 --> 01:15:39,170 We take him the last moment from the plane. 1581 01:15:39,209 --> 01:15:43,077 We land, take him from the plane to the ambulance. 1582 01:15:43,113 --> 01:15:46,207 Air Force jet lands, we take somebody else from that jet. 1583 01:15:46,249 --> 01:15:48,444 What the fuck do I care? 1584 01:15:48,485 --> 01:15:50,043 Somebody in a hospital gown. 1585 01:15:50,086 --> 01:15:51,747 You get me back for the beans. 1586 01:15:51,788 --> 01:15:53,255 'Cause tomorrow's the beans. 1587 01:15:53,289 --> 01:15:54,881 'Cause this dog ain't gonna hunt. 1588 01:15:54,924 --> 01:15:57,324 He's gonna be fine. 1589 01:15:57,360 --> 01:15:58,622 Aren't you, William? 1590 01:15:58,661 --> 01:16:01,186 Speaking of which, I have a prescription here. 1591 01:16:01,231 --> 01:16:03,563 I want you standing by with a lot of this stuff. 1592 01:16:03,600 --> 01:16:05,465 A crate of it. It's... 1593 01:16:07,704 --> 01:16:09,035 Anti-psychotic. 1594 01:16:09,906 --> 01:16:11,498 The number is V... 1595 01:16:13,576 --> 01:16:14,838 This is nothing. 1596 01:16:14,878 --> 01:16:16,869 I used to think I was a pharmacist... 1597 01:16:16,913 --> 01:16:18,244 the stuff I carried. 1598 01:16:18,281 --> 01:16:21,842 With the beans, you can tell if they're puttin' stuff in it. 1599 01:16:23,419 --> 01:16:25,751 So you don't have to fear it. 1600 01:16:27,056 --> 01:16:28,455 What kind of stuff? 1601 01:16:31,294 --> 01:16:33,524 What do you mean, what kind of stuff? 1602 01:16:36,432 --> 01:16:38,957 He just wanted to know what you meant. 1603 01:16:39,002 --> 01:16:40,469 Did you mean? 1604 01:16:40,503 --> 01:16:42,630 - I didn't. - He didn't mean. 1605 01:16:42,672 --> 01:16:45,106 - He didn't mean anything. - You meant something. 1606 01:16:45,141 --> 01:16:46,369 He didn't mean anything. 1607 01:16:46,409 --> 01:16:48,001 Give him another pill. 1608 01:16:48,044 --> 01:16:51,878 What the fuck do you mean, what kind of stuff? 1609 01:16:51,915 --> 01:16:54,076 Pill, William. 1610 01:16:54,484 --> 01:16:57,385 This is nothing. Did you ever shoot in Italy? 1611 01:16:57,420 --> 01:17:00,753 Try three starlets swacked-out on Benzedrine and grappa. 1612 01:17:00,790 --> 01:17:02,724 This is nothing. 1613 01:17:02,759 --> 01:17:04,852 This is a walk in the park. 1614 01:17:07,430 --> 01:17:08,761 Who are you? 1615 01:17:08,798 --> 01:17:10,527 Who are you sons of bitches? 1616 01:17:10,567 --> 01:17:13,127 - Killers! - Just calm down. 1617 01:17:13,169 --> 01:17:14,966 Where are you taking me? 1618 01:17:19,042 --> 01:17:20,373 Oh, my God! 1619 01:17:24,380 --> 01:17:26,541 Sergeant Willie Schumann is coming home. 1620 01:17:26,583 --> 01:17:29,074 Schumann's plane should be over the Atlantic Ocean... 1621 01:17:29,118 --> 01:17:31,848 making its final descent back into this country. 1622 01:17:31,888 --> 01:17:33,185 The White House reported... 1623 01:17:33,223 --> 01:17:36,420 he was safely rescued and on his way to American soil. 1624 01:17:36,459 --> 01:17:38,427 We're still waiting for his plane... 1625 01:17:38,461 --> 01:17:40,019 at Andrews Air Force Base. 1626 01:17:40,063 --> 01:17:43,328 A plane that is due to land. Long overdue. 1627 01:17:43,366 --> 01:17:46,096 The president is monitoring the situation... 1628 01:17:46,135 --> 01:17:48,103 personally and closely. 1629 01:17:48,137 --> 01:17:50,469 We will keep you updated as to any developments. 1630 01:17:50,506 --> 01:17:51,803 Thank you very much. 1631 01:17:51,841 --> 01:17:54,332 Oh, God. What do we do now? 1632 01:17:55,578 --> 01:17:57,671 What do we do now, boy producer? 1633 01:17:57,714 --> 01:18:00,239 Mister win-an-Emmy, social-conscience, whale-shit... 1634 01:18:00,283 --> 01:18:02,717 save-the-rain-forest, peacenik-commie... 1635 01:18:02,752 --> 01:18:04,982 fuckin'- hire-a-convict shithead? 1636 01:18:05,021 --> 01:18:08,320 What do we do now, liberal, affirmative action, shithead... 1637 01:18:08,358 --> 01:18:10,019 peacenik commie fuck? 1638 01:18:11,661 --> 01:18:14,858 This is nothing. Piece of cake. 1639 01:18:14,897 --> 01:18:17,627 Producing is being a samurai warrior. 1640 01:18:17,667 --> 01:18:19,362 They pay you day in, day out for years... 1641 01:18:19,402 --> 01:18:22,064 so that one day, when called upon... 1642 01:18:22,105 --> 01:18:25,074 you can respond, your training at its peak... 1643 01:18:25,108 --> 01:18:26,735 and save the day! 1644 01:18:30,546 --> 01:18:32,207 Produce this Schumann. 1645 01:18:32,248 --> 01:18:33,909 Produce him, I say... 1646 01:18:33,950 --> 01:18:35,474 or, and I don't hesitate to say this... 1647 01:18:35,518 --> 01:18:39,978 rank him as just another in a series of broken promises. 1648 01:18:40,023 --> 01:18:43,823 This tardy absence of the flight must give us pause... 1649 01:18:43,860 --> 01:18:48,388 and in that pause, we should take time to examine ourselves... 1650 01:18:48,431 --> 01:18:49,864 Fuck you. 1651 01:18:49,899 --> 01:18:52,060 Leave it alone. What did television do to you? 1652 01:18:52,101 --> 01:18:54,729 It destroyed the electoral process. 1653 01:18:54,771 --> 01:18:57,865 Enough lovemaking. Let's go. Come on. 1654 01:18:57,907 --> 01:19:01,035 - Where? - We got work to do. 1655 01:19:01,077 --> 01:19:02,544 Come on, pal. 1656 01:19:02,578 --> 01:19:04,045 Is it time for exercise? 1657 01:19:04,080 --> 01:19:06,071 It's my day in the yard. 1658 01:19:06,115 --> 01:19:07,844 Let's get him to the highway. 1659 01:19:07,884 --> 01:19:10,284 Think this is tough? Come on, pal! 1660 01:19:10,320 --> 01:19:12,652 This is nothing! Piece of cake! 1661 01:19:12,689 --> 01:19:14,384 Albanian dissidents... 1662 01:19:14,424 --> 01:19:17,291 having somehow obtained a surface-to-air missile... 1663 01:19:17,327 --> 01:19:19,795 You had your fortune here. 1664 01:19:19,829 --> 01:19:21,763 You were ready to throw it away. 1665 01:19:21,798 --> 01:19:25,063 If you got a problem, solve it. That's producing. 1666 01:19:25,101 --> 01:19:28,400 Someday when they tell this story... 1667 01:19:28,438 --> 01:19:29,905 You can't tell this story. 1668 01:19:29,939 --> 01:19:32,430 - Why not? - Somebody would have you killed. 1669 01:19:32,475 --> 01:19:34,875 Of course, I know. 1670 01:19:34,911 --> 01:19:38,711 Not now. But when they do tell the story... 1671 01:19:38,748 --> 01:19:41,876 Nobody can tell this story, ever. 1672 01:19:43,353 --> 01:19:46,550 Listen to me. This is what I do for a living. 1673 01:19:47,457 --> 01:19:49,618 You can't tell this story. He's not kidding you. 1674 01:19:49,659 --> 01:19:51,786 You can't tell this story. You knew that. 1675 01:19:51,828 --> 01:19:53,921 The deal was you get an ambassadorship. 1676 01:19:55,231 --> 01:19:57,290 I used to have a Camaro. 1677 01:19:57,333 --> 01:19:59,927 What are you going to tell? The guy's a nut case. 1678 01:19:59,969 --> 01:20:02,164 You would be too if you went through what he went through. 1679 01:20:02,205 --> 01:20:03,672 He raped a nun. 1680 01:20:03,706 --> 01:20:04,934 What he went through in Albania. 1681 01:20:04,974 --> 01:20:06,305 He's doped to the gills. 1682 01:20:06,342 --> 01:20:07,707 Where's my little pills? 1683 01:20:07,744 --> 01:20:08,972 Show some compassion. 1684 01:20:09,011 --> 01:20:11,309 He spent the last 12 years in a military prison. 1685 01:20:11,347 --> 01:20:13,508 How are we gonna explain that? 1686 01:20:13,549 --> 01:20:15,915 Explain it? Am I worried? 1687 01:20:15,952 --> 01:20:17,852 How do we explain that when the world is watching? 1688 01:20:17,887 --> 01:20:20,355 Fuck the world. Try a 10 a.m. Pitch meeting... 1689 01:20:20,390 --> 01:20:22,858 cooked to the gills, and you haven't read the treatment. 1690 01:20:22,892 --> 01:20:24,917 How do we explain he was in prison? 1691 01:20:26,028 --> 01:20:27,393 Well, you see, Winifred... 1692 01:20:27,430 --> 01:20:29,728 this is where you've never been at a pitch. 1693 01:20:29,766 --> 01:20:31,165 His records say he was in prison... 1694 01:20:31,200 --> 01:20:34,363 as they say for all the men and women of Group 303... 1695 01:20:34,404 --> 01:20:38,135 as they must because of the secrecy involved. 1696 01:20:55,925 --> 01:20:57,358 I'm on top of it. 1697 01:20:57,393 --> 01:20:59,418 Not sure whether enemy action... 1698 01:20:59,462 --> 01:21:00,929 I'm fine. I got it. 1699 01:21:02,465 --> 01:21:05,161 Stanley, I told you, I do this for a living. 1700 01:21:05,201 --> 01:21:06,828 You do what for a living? 1701 01:21:06,869 --> 01:21:08,496 Exactly what do you do for the president? 1702 01:21:08,538 --> 01:21:10,870 I lost my wallet. You got any change? 1703 01:21:13,009 --> 01:21:14,567 How we doing, boy? 1704 01:21:14,610 --> 01:21:16,134 Ready to mix it up? 1705 01:21:16,179 --> 01:21:18,010 Is today laundry day? 1706 01:21:18,047 --> 01:21:21,016 - What do you do on laundry day? - Laundry. 1707 01:21:21,050 --> 01:21:23,712 Stand by to copy this. Just get a pencil. 1708 01:21:23,753 --> 01:21:25,220 Down safely. 1709 01:21:25,254 --> 01:21:27,381 Produce this Schumann. 1710 01:21:27,423 --> 01:21:30,756 Produce him, I say, or, and I don't hesitate to say this... 1711 01:21:30,793 --> 01:21:34,923 rank him as just another in a series of broken promises. 1712 01:21:34,964 --> 01:21:36,431 Sustained minor injuries. 1713 01:21:36,466 --> 01:21:38,866 Flight crew being investigated for possible pilot error. 1714 01:21:38,901 --> 01:21:40,926 Transshipped to an undisclosed location. 1715 01:21:42,472 --> 01:21:45,771 This deserted runway should be filled with well-wishers. 1716 01:21:45,808 --> 01:21:49,107 How you doing? A cold drink? 1717 01:21:49,145 --> 01:21:51,636 Schumann was to return to American soil today... 1718 01:21:51,681 --> 01:21:53,706 after his safe rescue in Albania. 1719 01:21:54,550 --> 01:21:56,780 He looks like me. 1720 01:21:58,054 --> 01:22:01,114 ... deserves an explanation from the White House. 1721 01:22:01,157 --> 01:22:05,321 Wait, we are now going live to the White House. 1722 01:22:05,361 --> 01:22:07,829 I have an update regarding the aircraft incident... 1723 01:22:07,864 --> 01:22:09,525 involving Sergeant Schumann. 1724 01:22:09,565 --> 01:22:12,261 He is down safely and will be transshipped. 1725 01:22:12,301 --> 01:22:15,065 We are informed he has sustained minor injuries... 1726 01:22:15,104 --> 01:22:16,935 which will require his being medicated for some time... 1727 01:22:16,973 --> 01:22:19,066 Bring in the cavalry. Nick of time. 1728 01:22:21,511 --> 01:22:23,274 Political shitbirds. Fuck with us, huh? 1729 01:22:23,312 --> 01:22:24,904 They don't know who they're playing with. 1730 01:22:30,019 --> 01:22:31,350 Purty. 1731 01:22:33,122 --> 01:22:35,022 I'm a little concerned about the driver of the rig. 1732 01:22:35,057 --> 01:22:36,547 - What rig? - The harvester. 1733 01:22:36,592 --> 01:22:39,618 - What about him? - He doesn't have his green card. 1734 01:22:44,534 --> 01:22:46,092 So what? 1735 01:22:46,135 --> 01:22:49,730 You want Schumann to be rescued by an illegal alien? 1736 01:22:49,772 --> 01:22:52,832 We can't have Schumann saved by an illegal immigrant. 1737 01:22:52,875 --> 01:22:54,843 Get on the phone. Fly in ajudge. 1738 01:22:54,877 --> 01:22:57,368 Get on the phone. What's all this moping about? 1739 01:23:03,586 --> 01:23:05,247 Do you have any change? 1740 01:23:07,256 --> 01:23:10,623 I like the night life, I like to boogie. 1741 01:23:12,828 --> 01:23:13,954 Susie! 1742 01:23:13,996 --> 01:23:15,327 William? 1743 01:23:15,364 --> 01:23:17,195 Are you all right? 1744 01:23:21,237 --> 01:23:22,602 Kickball. 1745 01:23:28,277 --> 01:23:31,269 Let me talk to him! 1746 01:23:31,314 --> 01:23:32,781 What are you doing? 1747 01:23:32,815 --> 01:23:34,180 I think we should... 1748 01:23:34,216 --> 01:23:37,549 Willie, where are you going? 1749 01:23:38,821 --> 01:23:40,288 Shoester! 1750 01:23:45,094 --> 01:23:48,586 Let me talk to him. Shoe, you in there? 1751 01:23:48,631 --> 01:23:50,895 I'll kill that son of a bitch. 1752 01:23:50,933 --> 01:23:53,902 I have a relationship. You want to talk? 1753 01:23:53,936 --> 01:23:56,461 Get you anything you want. You want some beans? 1754 01:23:56,505 --> 01:23:57,802 Will that do it, Shoester? 1755 01:24:00,176 --> 01:24:01,541 Come on, Shoe! 1756 01:24:03,713 --> 01:24:05,806 He's dead. 1757 01:24:14,290 --> 01:24:15,518 Wait a minute. 1758 01:24:15,558 --> 01:24:17,753 He's not dead. He's alive. 1759 01:24:19,061 --> 01:24:20,426 Strike that. 1760 01:24:27,103 --> 01:24:29,128 So close and yet so far. 1761 01:24:29,171 --> 01:24:30,468 What do you mean? 1762 01:24:30,506 --> 01:24:31,905 We were this close. 1763 01:24:31,941 --> 01:24:34,205 This is nothing. 1764 01:24:34,243 --> 01:24:35,471 This just got big. 1765 01:24:35,511 --> 01:24:37,502 Big? He's dead. 1766 01:24:37,546 --> 01:24:38,911 We killed Old Shoe. 1767 01:24:40,316 --> 01:24:43,217 What is better than the triumphal homecoming... 1768 01:24:43,252 --> 01:24:44,947 of a war hero? 1769 01:24:51,394 --> 01:24:52,520 Ready! 1770 01:24:53,295 --> 01:24:54,421 Lift! 1771 01:24:54,463 --> 01:24:56,590 We're gathered here... 1772 01:24:57,233 --> 01:25:00,202 with a cross to bear. 1773 01:25:00,236 --> 01:25:02,397 The bravest men... 1774 01:25:03,539 --> 01:25:05,769 anywhere. 1775 01:25:06,208 --> 01:25:08,699 That this great land... 1776 01:25:08,744 --> 01:25:12,373 will remain free. 1777 01:25:12,415 --> 01:25:14,076 God bless the men... 1778 01:25:14,116 --> 01:25:17,984 of the 303. 1779 01:25:18,554 --> 01:25:21,182 Side by side... 1780 01:25:21,223 --> 01:25:24,192 we know no fear. 1781 01:25:24,226 --> 01:25:27,195 Our minds are sharp. 1782 01:25:27,229 --> 01:25:30,164 Our eyes are clear. 1783 01:25:30,199 --> 01:25:33,225 In the air, on land... 1784 01:25:33,269 --> 01:25:36,102 or on the sea... 1785 01:25:36,138 --> 01:25:38,368 we're the fightin' men... 1786 01:25:38,407 --> 01:25:42,002 of the 303. 1787 01:25:45,247 --> 01:25:48,080 Give us this day... 1788 01:25:48,117 --> 01:25:51,177 our daily bread... 1789 01:25:51,220 --> 01:25:53,518 and leopard skin... 1790 01:25:54,523 --> 01:25:57,151 for our head. 1791 01:25:57,193 --> 01:25:59,286 That we may fight... 1792 01:26:07,470 --> 01:26:08,698 Coffee? 1793 01:26:08,738 --> 01:26:10,137 Please. 1794 01:26:10,172 --> 01:26:12,265 Looking good. 1795 01:26:12,308 --> 01:26:14,503 Bring it all back home. 1796 01:26:14,543 --> 01:26:17,205 Lassie barks twice, and it's time to take out the garbage. 1797 01:26:17,246 --> 01:26:18,804 Hell of a show. 1798 01:26:18,848 --> 01:26:20,247 Hell of ajob. 1799 01:26:20,282 --> 01:26:21,943 It's just producing. 1800 01:26:21,984 --> 01:26:24,976 There's no Academy Award for producing. 1801 01:26:25,020 --> 01:26:26,351 You're kidding. 1802 01:26:27,623 --> 01:26:29,955 Where do movies come from if nobody produces them? 1803 01:26:31,260 --> 01:26:32,989 They come from people like you. 1804 01:26:36,565 --> 01:26:38,362 You just got to take the bitter with the better. 1805 01:26:38,400 --> 01:26:40,891 Job's almost done... 1806 01:26:40,936 --> 01:26:42,096 knock on wood. 1807 01:26:43,072 --> 01:26:44,369 We did a good job. 1808 01:26:44,406 --> 01:26:45,703 That's our reward. 1809 01:26:47,276 --> 01:26:48,971 You can't save the world. 1810 01:26:49,011 --> 01:26:50,342 All you can do is try. 1811 01:26:50,946 --> 01:26:52,777 Ain't that the truth? 1812 01:26:58,354 --> 01:27:00,083 As we said, the president... 1813 01:27:00,122 --> 01:27:02,784 thrust of the Albanian episode to put him over the top. 1814 01:27:02,825 --> 01:27:05,919 You could say that, Shirley, but it's not true. 1815 01:27:05,961 --> 01:27:07,326 What would be true, then? 1816 01:27:07,363 --> 01:27:09,524 You said it earlier, if I may rephrase... 1817 01:27:09,565 --> 01:27:11,726 the success of the president in the polls... 1818 01:27:11,767 --> 01:27:16,067 As of today, 89% favorable. 1819 01:27:16,105 --> 01:27:18,665 Based not on the events... 1820 01:27:18,707 --> 01:27:21,267 but on the spin given to those events. 1821 01:27:21,310 --> 01:27:24,746 What's the lesson here? Never give up. 1822 01:27:24,780 --> 01:27:26,008 You're right. 1823 01:27:26,048 --> 01:27:27,481 The show must go on. 1824 01:27:27,516 --> 01:27:28,744 Proud tradition. 1825 01:27:28,784 --> 01:27:33,118 I am prouder of this than anything I ever did. 1826 01:27:33,155 --> 01:27:34,383 You should be. 1827 01:27:34,423 --> 01:27:35,890 I want to thank you. 1828 01:27:39,628 --> 01:27:40,993 You gave me a good opportunity. 1829 01:27:44,900 --> 01:27:48,063 As we said, the president, a surefire winner... 1830 01:27:48,103 --> 01:27:51,004 and the campaign, many said, that put him there. 1831 01:27:51,674 --> 01:27:53,699 Another great race today, Johnny. 1832 01:27:53,742 --> 01:27:56,040 Who you going to ride in the Stakes? 1833 01:27:56,078 --> 01:27:58,842 Eddie, like my daddy always used to say... 1834 01:27:58,881 --> 01:28:00,075 The message is irrelevant. 1835 01:28:00,115 --> 01:28:02,106 The main element we have to deal with... 1836 01:28:02,151 --> 01:28:04,676 is that fear is what's driving a lot of people. 1837 01:28:04,720 --> 01:28:06,517 Commercials. 1838 01:28:07,957 --> 01:28:10,187 The president is a product. 1839 01:28:11,026 --> 01:28:13,927 He's the President of the United States at 89%. 1840 01:28:13,963 --> 01:28:15,658 Which we're dealing with today. 1841 01:28:15,698 --> 01:28:17,165 Commercials. 1842 01:28:18,534 --> 01:28:21,332 It's time the American people began to look at that. 1843 01:28:21,370 --> 01:28:24,339 Now we're going to take your calls. 1844 01:28:24,373 --> 01:28:25,897 The number is 1-800... 1845 01:28:25,941 --> 01:28:28,136 Oh, shit. 1846 01:28:37,386 --> 01:28:39,149 Stanley, what are you doing? 1847 01:28:39,188 --> 01:28:40,485 What am I doing? 1848 01:28:41,891 --> 01:28:43,552 I'm going to call somebody. 1849 01:28:44,894 --> 01:28:46,191 That's very funny. 1850 01:28:46,228 --> 01:28:47,889 I'm going to get these people straight. 1851 01:28:47,930 --> 01:28:49,454 You can't do that. 1852 01:28:49,498 --> 01:28:51,796 Watch me. 1853 01:28:55,537 --> 01:28:57,095 You knew the deal when you signed on. 1854 01:28:57,139 --> 01:28:59,164 Come on. Deals change. 1855 01:28:59,208 --> 01:29:00,971 Sure it is. 1856 01:29:01,010 --> 01:29:04,036 Let's rethink that ambassadorship. 1857 01:29:04,079 --> 01:29:06,070 I'm talking London. I'm talking Paris. 1858 01:29:06,115 --> 01:29:08,413 A secret account for your extra expenses... 1859 01:29:08,450 --> 01:29:09,883 getting laid whenever you want. 1860 01:29:09,919 --> 01:29:11,352 Marine guards will salute you. 1861 01:29:11,387 --> 01:29:14,254 It's tempting, but I got to answer to a higher calling. 1862 01:29:14,290 --> 01:29:16,258 - Art. - Money? 1863 01:29:16,292 --> 01:29:18,385 You think I did this for money? 1864 01:29:18,427 --> 01:29:21,123 I did this for credit. 1865 01:29:21,163 --> 01:29:22,596 You knew you couldn't take the credit. 1866 01:29:22,631 --> 01:29:24,098 I'm not going to stand here... 1867 01:29:24,133 --> 01:29:26,567 and let two dickheads from film school take it. 1868 01:29:26,602 --> 01:29:28,467 Listen to me. 1869 01:29:28,504 --> 01:29:29,732 Are you nuts? 1870 01:29:29,772 --> 01:29:31,069 Stanley, no fooling. 1871 01:29:31,106 --> 01:29:32,767 You're playing with your life. 1872 01:29:32,808 --> 01:29:34,139 Fuck my life. 1873 01:29:34,176 --> 01:29:36,144 I want the credit. 1874 01:29:36,178 --> 01:29:38,703 Know what the New York Times said about my last picture? 1875 01:29:38,747 --> 01:29:40,510 They called it "a thrill ride for the ages..." 1876 01:29:40,549 --> 01:29:42,039 but they didn't mention the producer. 1877 01:29:42,084 --> 01:29:44,245 They talked about the costumes... 1878 01:29:44,286 --> 01:29:45,810 but never talked about the producer. 1879 01:29:45,854 --> 01:29:47,082 You know what that picture grossed? 1880 01:29:47,122 --> 01:29:48,350 Now I'm going to stand here... 1881 01:29:48,390 --> 01:29:50,551 and let some limp-dick film-school pansy... 1882 01:29:50,592 --> 01:29:51,820 take the credit? 1883 01:29:51,860 --> 01:29:53,327 You can't do it. 1884 01:29:53,362 --> 01:29:55,330 Don't you tell me that! 1885 01:29:55,364 --> 01:29:57,764 Don't you ever tell me that! 1886 01:29:57,800 --> 01:29:59,563 I am the producer! 1887 01:29:59,601 --> 01:30:01,660 If I didn't step up, you're nowhere! 1888 01:30:01,704 --> 01:30:04,264 I put this together out of spit and polish! 1889 01:30:04,306 --> 01:30:06,240 Look at that. 1890 01:30:06,275 --> 01:30:08,800 That is a complete fucking fraud... 1891 01:30:08,844 --> 01:30:12,211 and it looks 100% real. 1892 01:30:18,187 --> 01:30:21,247 It's the best work I've ever done in my life... 1893 01:30:21,290 --> 01:30:23,485 because it's so honest. 1894 01:30:31,500 --> 01:30:33,468 They told me I couldn't remake Moby Dick... 1895 01:30:33,502 --> 01:30:35,094 from the point of view of the whale. 1896 01:30:35,137 --> 01:30:36,968 $450 million domestic. 1897 01:30:37,006 --> 01:30:38,473 I'm not even talking about the video. 1898 01:30:38,507 --> 01:30:40,634 I made this lame turkey fly. 1899 01:30:40,676 --> 01:30:42,268 I did it... pure Hollywood. 1900 01:30:43,946 --> 01:30:47,404 For once in my life, I won't be pissed on. 1901 01:30:47,449 --> 01:30:48,643 Do you hear me? 1902 01:30:49,818 --> 01:30:51,479 I want the credit. 1903 01:30:53,389 --> 01:30:55,323 I'm taking it. 1904 01:30:55,357 --> 01:30:57,052 Shit. 1905 01:31:11,473 --> 01:31:13,498 He's coming down. 1906 01:31:13,542 --> 01:31:15,908 Could I see you a minute? Thanks. 1907 01:31:19,882 --> 01:31:21,008 Do you swear to uphold... 1908 01:31:21,050 --> 01:31:22,517 the duties and responsibilities... 1909 01:31:22,551 --> 01:31:25,281 of a citizen of the United States of America... 1910 01:31:25,320 --> 01:31:27,288 to defend her in time of peril... 1911 01:31:27,322 --> 01:31:30,780 to defend her from all enemies, foreign and domestic? 1912 01:31:30,826 --> 01:31:33,488 Do you make this pledge with full resolve? 1913 01:31:51,313 --> 01:31:53,713 Common ground... 1914 01:31:53,749 --> 01:31:57,014 and family. 1915 01:31:57,052 --> 01:31:58,519 Let's give thanks... 1916 01:31:58,554 --> 01:32:02,957 to the 303. 1917 01:32:02,991 --> 01:32:05,653 Years from now... 1918 01:32:05,694 --> 01:32:08,663 when we are gone... 1919 01:32:08,697 --> 01:32:11,666 our children's kids... 1920 01:32:11,700 --> 01:32:15,067 will hear this song. 1921 01:32:15,104 --> 01:32:17,732 Think how strong... 1922 01:32:17,773 --> 01:32:21,106 and proud they'll be. 1923 01:32:21,143 --> 01:32:22,508 Grandpa fought... 1924 01:32:22,544 --> 01:32:26,776 for the 303. 1925 01:32:26,815 --> 01:32:29,306 God bless the men... 1926 01:32:29,351 --> 01:32:37,383 of the 303. 1927 01:32:38,660 --> 01:32:40,150 Ten-hut! 1928 01:32:40,195 --> 01:32:42,595 Present arms! 1929 01:32:51,540 --> 01:32:54,304 Turning to the Hollywood page... 1930 01:32:54,343 --> 01:32:57,244 famed film producer Stanley R. Motss... 1931 01:32:57,279 --> 01:32:59,679 died suddenly of a massive heart attack... 1932 01:32:59,715 --> 01:33:01,842 while sunbathing poolside. 1933 01:33:01,884 --> 01:33:05,547 Mr. Motss was 57 or 62-years-old... 1934 01:33:05,587 --> 01:33:07,612 depending on the bio. 1935 01:33:07,656 --> 01:33:09,851 His credits include numerous films... 1936 01:33:09,892 --> 01:33:14,591 which America has come to love as old classics. 1937 01:33:18,767 --> 01:33:19,995 This just in. 1938 01:33:20,035 --> 01:33:22,435 A group calling itself "Albania Unite..." 1939 01:33:22,471 --> 01:33:24,996 has claimed responsibility for the bombing moments ago... 1940 01:33:25,040 --> 01:33:26,871 of the village of Klos, Albania. 1941 01:33:26,909 --> 01:33:28,638 The president was unavailable for comment... 1942 01:33:28,677 --> 01:33:31,407 but General William Scott of the Joint Chiefs of Staff... 1943 01:33:31,446 --> 01:33:33,880 says he has no doubt we'll be sending planes and troops... 1944 01:33:33,916 --> 01:33:35,440 back in to finish thejob. 1945 01:33:47,241 --> 01:36:55,441 Subtitles by ARAVIND B [by_agentsmith@yahoo.com]