1 00:06:48,993 --> 00:06:49,993 How are you? 2 00:06:53,382 --> 00:06:55,502 Didn't we just talk about that? 3 00:06:57,302 --> 00:06:58,302 That was yesterday. 4 00:06:59,921 --> 00:07:01,471 Today is Tuesday. 5 00:07:04,720 --> 00:07:06,120 So I've been here long? 6 00:07:09,990 --> 00:07:10,990 A month. 7 00:07:15,589 --> 00:07:16,849 Wayne Says 8 00:07:19,188 --> 00:07:21,988 My grief pattern is atypical 9 00:07:27,037 --> 00:07:28,037 Yeah 10 00:07:33,866 --> 00:07:35,096 Got to talk with Wayne. 11 00:07:36,815 --> 00:07:39,635 I think he gives too much medication Way too much 12 00:07:41,275 --> 00:07:42,614 Stop it, please. 13 00:07:43,574 --> 00:07:45,674 trust on this to be smarter than you. 14 00:07:46,084 --> 00:07:48,773 He strayed out of medical school He don't know what he's doing 15 00:07:49,013 --> 00:07:51,573 I've treated ten tenths as many patients as he has 16 00:07:54,103 --> 00:07:55,412 But you're not a doctor. 17 00:07:56,962 --> 00:07:57,962 No, I'm not 18 00:07:59,342 --> 00:08:02,031 And I'm proud that I'm not a doctor like him. 19 00:08:04,481 --> 00:08:05,481 There is nothing ... 20 00:08:05,921 --> 00:08:07,581 atypical about your grief 21 00:08:18,159 --> 00:08:19,539 It was my fault. 22 00:08:22,748 --> 00:08:23,748 What about me? 23 00:08:24,378 --> 00:08:25,378 I was there too. 24 00:08:26,088 --> 00:08:27,327 I could have stopped him. 25 00:08:29,077 --> 00:08:30,077 No. 26 00:08:33,716 --> 00:08:34,936 You didn't know that he... 27 00:08:34,956 --> 00:08:36,936 Started waking up lately 28 00:08:41,905 --> 00:08:44,135 I was aware that he would sometimes ... 29 00:08:45,005 --> 00:08:46,004 wake up 30 00:08:48,244 --> 00:08:49,974 And crawl out of bed 31 00:08:51,154 --> 00:08:52,213 And walk about 32 00:08:54,463 --> 00:08:57,133 Just as you thought that he was soundly asleep 33 00:08:58,182 --> 00:08:59,972 He could open the baby gate 34 00:09:02,512 --> 00:09:03,512 He ... 35 00:09:03,992 --> 00:09:04,991 He woke up ... 36 00:09:08,891 --> 00:09:09,891 And w... 37 00:09:10,031 --> 00:09:12,170 Was confused 38 00:09:20,269 --> 00:09:21,269 Hey! 39 00:09:42,335 --> 00:09:44,045 Dr.Wayne says he won't be back home. 40 00:09:48,484 --> 00:09:50,274 You couldn't leave it, could you? 41 00:09:50,684 --> 00:09:51,884 You had to mettle. 42 00:09:51,904 --> 00:09:53,354 This place leads nowhere. 43 00:09:54,773 --> 00:09:55,773 On the contrary ... 44 00:09:57,543 --> 00:09:58,543 Grief 45 00:10:00,882 --> 00:10:02,167 It's not a disease ... 46 00:10:02,202 --> 00:10:04,202 It's a natural healthy reaction. 47 00:10:04,402 --> 00:10:06,132 You can't just remove it You mustn't ... 48 00:10:08,181 --> 00:10:09,981 Wayne knows you're a therapist 49 00:10:11,161 --> 00:10:13,211 He said you shouldn't treat your own family 50 00:10:13,910 --> 00:10:15,310 In principle I agree, but ... 51 00:10:16,290 --> 00:10:18,240 But you're just so much smarter 52 00:10:18,630 --> 00:10:19,629 Aren't you? 53 00:10:21,509 --> 00:10:22,509 I love you. 54 00:10:25,729 --> 00:10:28,418 Nothing hurts more than to see the one thy in love ... 55 00:10:29,448 --> 00:10:31,458 Subjected to mistakes and wrongs 56 00:10:33,137 --> 00:10:36,087 No therapist can know as much about you as I do 57 00:12:51,655 --> 00:12:53,405 - It hurts. - I know. 58 00:12:55,765 --> 00:12:56,765 There's no way around it. 59 00:13:02,034 --> 00:13:03,123 I want to talk to ... 60 00:13:03,283 --> 00:13:05,123 I'm not gonna let you do that. 61 00:13:10,422 --> 00:13:12,252 Why not just go all alone? 62 00:13:12,872 --> 00:13:13,872 No. 63 00:13:14,512 --> 00:13:15,512 A little change. 64 00:13:18,261 --> 00:13:19,901 Wouldn't get any worse ... 65 00:13:22,020 --> 00:13:23,020 Yes, it will. 66 00:13:44,767 --> 00:13:46,817 You're always been distant from me and Nick 67 00:13:49,686 --> 00:13:51,536 Ever I come to think of it 68 00:13:52,476 --> 00:13:53,855 Very very distant 69 00:13:56,135 --> 00:13:57,135 Okay 70 00:13:58,095 --> 00:14:00,064 Can you give me some examples from this? 71 00:14:03,254 --> 00:14:05,244 Hell, That's not that difficult to understand. 72 00:14:09,833 --> 00:14:12,233 I've lost someone, for instance... 73 00:14:14,332 --> 00:14:16,012 You terribly distant lost someone 74 00:14:18,671 --> 00:14:19,671 As a father ... 75 00:14:20,321 --> 00:14:21,431 And as a husband. 76 00:14:23,131 --> 00:14:24,751 And that was Nick's last summer 77 00:14:24,920 --> 00:14:25,920 you missed that on 78 00:14:27,550 --> 00:14:28,550 Too bad 79 00:14:33,049 --> 00:14:34,649 I never interested you. 80 00:14:35,789 --> 00:14:36,789 Until now. 81 00:14:38,078 --> 00:14:39,218 That I'm your patient. 82 00:14:41,898 --> 00:14:44,457 Perhaps I'm not supposed to talk about these things 83 00:14:45,547 --> 00:14:47,037 There is nothing you can't talk about 84 00:14:50,986 --> 00:14:54,116 You are indifferent to whether your child is alive or dead 85 00:15:02,465 --> 00:15:05,364 I bet you have a lot of clever therapist replies to that. 86 00:15:05,864 --> 00:15:06,864 Haven't you? 87 00:15:12,473 --> 00:15:13,473 Well, actually ... 88 00:15:15,682 --> 00:15:16,591 It was to ... 89 00:15:16,592 --> 00:15:17,592 Honor your wish. 90 00:15:18,372 --> 00:15:19,612 You wanted peace to write. 91 00:15:21,382 --> 00:15:22,431 Perhaps I didn't mean it 92 00:15:24,151 --> 00:15:25,381 What I understood ... 93 00:15:27,171 --> 00:15:28,720 Is that you want me to ride alone 94 00:15:30,060 --> 00:15:32,180 That you and Nick, were going to go to Eden. 95 00:15:32,460 --> 00:15:33,460 Just the two of you 96 00:15:34,319 --> 00:15:36,409 That way you could finish your thesis 97 00:15:39,579 --> 00:15:40,578 But I didn't 98 00:15:42,688 --> 00:15:43,688 You didn't? 99 00:15:44,568 --> 00:15:45,568 You see? 100 00:15:46,158 --> 00:15:47,207 You didn't even know that. 101 00:15:47,947 --> 00:15:49,757 Why did you give up? That's not like you 102 00:15:50,247 --> 00:15:53,256 The hope project Just seemed ... Less important upthere. 103 00:15:54,806 --> 00:15:57,276 As you said, When I like told you about my subject... 104 00:15:58,026 --> 00:15:59,026 Glib 105 00:15:59,615 --> 00:16:01,085 I never called your subject glib 106 00:16:02,025 --> 00:16:04,115 Perhaps you didn't use that word, but that's what you meant. 107 00:16:05,554 --> 00:16:07,394 And all of a sudden It was glib 108 00:16:11,224 --> 00:16:13,513 Or even was ... some kind of lie. 109 00:16:14,253 --> 00:16:15,253 I see 110 00:16:16,533 --> 00:16:17,533 No, You don't see. 111 00:16:18,752 --> 00:16:19,782 You see a lot of things 112 00:16:20,022 --> 00:16:21,022 But not that. 113 00:17:50,078 --> 00:17:52,357 Inhale... On a count of five 114 00:17:54,167 --> 00:17:55,517 Call me, call me. 115 00:17:55,677 --> 00:17:58,676 Just ... Follow me ... 116 00:17:58,746 --> 00:18:00,376 Do it with me ... Inhale ... 117 00:18:00,406 --> 00:18:01,535 Inhale ... 118 00:18:01,536 --> 00:18:02,866 on a count to five ... 119 00:18:04,786 --> 00:18:06,995 Inhale... Two 120 00:18:11,294 --> 00:18:12,294 Stay with me ... 121 00:18:12,514 --> 00:18:14,754 Stay with me ... I'm Gonna teach you how to breathe. 122 00:18:15,474 --> 00:18:16,474 Inhale ... 123 00:18:17,543 --> 00:18:18,983 2 ... 3 ... 124 00:18:19,233 --> 00:18:20,843 4, 5, hold. 125 00:18:22,333 --> 00:18:23,738 2 ... 3 ... 126 00:18:23,773 --> 00:18:26,482 4, 5, exhale ... 127 00:18:27,002 --> 00:18:28,002 Good. 128 00:18:28,142 --> 00:18:29,142 Imagine ... 129 00:18:29,562 --> 00:18:31,371 Imagine you're blowing on your ... 130 00:18:31,591 --> 00:18:33,981 Vessel plumbs 131 00:18:34,631 --> 00:18:36,091 Calmly, quietly ... 132 00:18:39,500 --> 00:18:41,210 Yes, yes, that's good. 133 00:18:41,770 --> 00:18:42,769 That's good. 134 00:18:47,299 --> 00:18:48,299 That's very good. 135 00:18:49,838 --> 00:18:51,888 I told you there would be a change. 136 00:18:53,118 --> 00:18:55,457 You're still mourning but you're in a new phase. 137 00:19:01,726 --> 00:19:02,700 What phase? 138 00:19:02,701 --> 00:19:03,701 Anxiety. 139 00:19:05,786 --> 00:19:06,786 Anxiety. 140 00:19:06,896 --> 00:19:07,895 Yes 141 00:19:08,915 --> 00:19:09,965 This is physical. 142 00:19:13,895 --> 00:19:14,984 It's dangerous. 143 00:19:15,074 --> 00:19:16,204 No, it's not dangerous. 144 00:19:17,584 --> 00:19:19,794 Just as your grief wasn't dangerous 145 00:19:21,083 --> 00:19:22,613 a main part of anxiety 146 00:19:22,873 --> 00:19:23,873 Is physical 147 00:19:24,293 --> 00:19:25,533 Dizzy spells 148 00:19:26,523 --> 00:19:27,522 Dry mouth ... 149 00:19:28,492 --> 00:19:29,952 misguided hearing ... 150 00:19:30,342 --> 00:19:31,342 Trembling 151 00:19:31,652 --> 00:19:33,071 Heavy breathing ... 152 00:19:33,161 --> 00:19:34,361 Less pulse ... 153 00:19:34,651 --> 00:19:35,651 Nausea ... 154 00:19:46,139 --> 00:19:47,139 Hey! 155 00:19:53,608 --> 00:19:54,597 Easy ... 156 00:19:54,598 --> 00:19:56,098 Never screw your therapist. 157 00:19:57,308 --> 00:19:59,447 No matter how much your therapist may like it 158 00:20:02,157 --> 00:20:03,727 I know that distracts you, but ... 159 00:20:04,606 --> 00:20:05,606 It's not good for us. 160 00:20:06,046 --> 00:20:07,046 Do the breathing. 161 00:20:09,020 --> 00:20:10,888 Hold 162 00:20:12,995 --> 00:20:13,995 Exhale 163 00:20:15,466 --> 00:20:16,337 You love me? 164 00:20:17,424 --> 00:20:18,424 Yes, I do 165 00:20:21,512 --> 00:20:22,472 Then help me. 166 00:20:26,901 --> 00:20:27,724 It's what I'm doing 167 00:20:35,522 --> 00:20:36,521 Exposure 168 00:20:37,271 --> 00:20:39,931 That's the only thing that really works ... 169 00:20:41,021 --> 00:20:42,619 Everything else is ... 170 00:20:42,620 --> 00:20:43,620 Just talk 171 00:20:45,292 --> 00:20:49,168 You have to have the courage to stay in the situation that frightens you. 172 00:20:50,281 --> 00:20:52,575 And then you'll learn that fear isn't dangerous. 173 00:20:55,156 --> 00:20:57,141 Let's make a list of things you're afraid of. 174 00:20:58,568 --> 00:21:01,335 In the top You put the situation you fear the most 175 00:21:07,425 --> 00:21:09,107 But I don't know what I'm afraid of 176 00:21:11,896 --> 00:21:14,895 Just ... take your time. 177 00:21:16,850 --> 00:21:17,660 I'm thinking. 178 00:21:18,105 --> 00:21:19,105 Okay 179 00:21:25,771 --> 00:21:27,110 I'm thinking, but ... 180 00:21:29,857 --> 00:21:33,140 Can't I just be afraid without a definite object? 181 00:22:31,813 --> 00:22:32,813 No, no! 182 00:23:15,686 --> 00:23:17,326 This won't do 183 00:23:21,635 --> 00:23:23,926 Stupe Stupidest thing I could do to you 184 00:23:29,529 --> 00:23:30,763 If you can't tell me ... 185 00:23:32,463 --> 00:23:33,813 What your fear's of. 186 00:23:34,254 --> 00:23:36,231 Maybe it would be easier for you to tell me 187 00:23:36,603 --> 00:23:37,953 Where you're afraid? 188 00:23:38,623 --> 00:23:41,050 Where would you feel most exposed? 189 00:23:43,529 --> 00:23:44,716 What would be the worst place? 190 00:23:48,021 --> 00:23:49,121 An apartment? 191 00:23:53,940 --> 00:23:54,940 The street? 192 00:23:56,280 --> 00:23:57,279 A store? 193 00:24:00,079 --> 00:24:01,079 The park? 194 00:24:05,013 --> 00:24:06,182 Listening to someone, maybe. 195 00:24:18,346 --> 00:24:19,572 The woods. 196 00:24:21,464 --> 00:24:22,555 The woods? 197 00:24:27,255 --> 00:24:28,255 The woods, yes. 198 00:24:28,295 --> 00:24:30,004 It's funny because ... 199 00:24:30,184 --> 00:24:32,814 you were the one that always wanted to go into the woods 200 00:24:35,278 --> 00:24:41,370 What scares you about the woods? What frightens you... there? 201 00:24:45,052 --> 00:24:46,052 Everything 202 00:24:52,648 --> 00:24:55,396 Tell me what you think is supposed to happen in the woods. 203 00:25:02,989 --> 00:25:03,989 Eh? 204 00:25:06,452 --> 00:25:08,082 Is it any woods in particular? 205 00:25:15,287 --> 00:25:16,326 Eden. 206 00:25:16,327 --> 00:25:17,827 Eden? 207 00:25:23,028 --> 00:25:25,131 What do you say we put... 208 00:25:26,505 --> 00:25:30,305 A garden round Eden at the top of the pyramid? 209 00:25:32,454 --> 00:25:33,454 No. 210 00:25:34,274 --> 00:25:35,764 Not quite at the top. 211 00:25:47,142 --> 00:25:48,142 No. 212 00:25:57,760 --> 00:25:58,760 Okay 213 00:26:14,958 --> 00:26:16,657 It's... It's okay 214 00:26:16,658 --> 00:26:18,658 - I'm sorry - It's okay 215 00:27:00,077 --> 00:27:01,974 We can start by working on your expectations 216 00:27:03,460 --> 00:27:04,620 Close your eyes. 217 00:27:10,079 --> 00:27:12,258 Feel the seat underneath you. 218 00:27:14,986 --> 00:27:17,376 Feel yourself sinking down into it 219 00:27:18,694 --> 00:27:19,772 Folding you ... 220 00:27:21,656 --> 00:27:22,555 It's a nice feeling. 221 00:27:25,304 --> 00:27:27,530 What you feel is a pleasant warmth 222 00:27:28,388 --> 00:27:29,599 and heaviness 223 00:27:32,399 --> 00:27:34,274 your breath... is deep 224 00:27:36,255 --> 00:27:40,654 I gather You sink ... 225 00:27:41,384 --> 00:27:42,384 Down ... 226 00:27:43,951 --> 00:27:45,222 Imagine you're at Eden. 227 00:27:47,434 --> 00:27:50,050 Imagine you arrived at Eden through the woods. 228 00:27:53,662 --> 00:27:55,222 Tell me what you see? 229 00:28:01,121 --> 00:28:02,470 I'm at the bridge. 230 00:28:04,254 --> 00:28:05,278 It's evening 231 00:28:08,000 --> 00:28:09,849 Almost no voice can be heard. 232 00:28:12,290 --> 00:28:14,087 The water is running without a sound. 233 00:28:17,554 --> 00:28:19,637 Darkness comes out anytime here 234 00:28:22,487 --> 00:28:23,637 I walk into it 235 00:28:37,557 --> 00:28:39,905 The little deers ... are hiding. 236 00:28:39,940 --> 00:28:42,704 Among their friends. As usual. 237 00:28:44,634 --> 00:28:47,013 Is it Difficult to go upthere? 238 00:28:48,373 --> 00:28:49,373 No. 239 00:28:50,163 --> 00:28:51,163 Not really. 240 00:28:53,312 --> 00:28:54,992 That is almost okay 241 00:29:04,781 --> 00:29:06,490 In a mountain of trees ... 242 00:29:07,784 --> 00:29:08,727 Almosty 243 00:29:10,613 --> 00:29:12,246 There's a built foxhole 244 00:29:16,446 --> 00:29:17,646 How do you feel there? 245 00:29:21,108 --> 00:29:22,148 I can't really tell. 246 00:29:24,247 --> 00:29:25,537 It should be easy ... 247 00:29:25,572 --> 00:29:26,647 passing 248 00:29:27,787 --> 00:29:28,817 And yet ... 249 00:29:29,907 --> 00:29:31,726 It's like walking through mud. 250 00:29:42,585 --> 00:29:43,524 The trunk is thick 251 00:29:47,064 --> 00:29:48,744 the dear old **** 252 00:29:51,403 --> 00:29:54,143 It has some strange kind of personality. 253 00:29:56,142 --> 00:29:57,332 I've always found that. 254 00:30:03,971 --> 00:30:05,041 No. 255 00:30:06,901 --> 00:30:09,580 Where are you, are you...? Are you heading for the cabin? 256 00:30:12,790 --> 00:30:13,820 Yes, I am 257 00:30:17,539 --> 00:30:19,589 I'm walking up above ... 258 00:30:20,179 --> 00:30:21,728 Through the tall grass ... 259 00:30:22,108 --> 00:30:23,088 Then don't come in. 260 00:30:24,198 --> 00:30:25,088 Don't go in. 261 00:30:27,017 --> 00:30:28,617 You see outside you're afraid of 262 00:30:28,637 --> 00:30:29,767 Don't look around ... 263 00:30:30,977 --> 00:30:32,137 No. 264 00:30:33,286 --> 00:30:34,706 Lie down on the green. 265 00:30:38,096 --> 00:30:39,495 You want me to lie down? 266 00:30:39,695 --> 00:30:41,215 Lie down on the grass. 267 00:30:44,695 --> 00:30:46,384 On top of all the plants? 268 00:30:46,419 --> 00:30:48,074 Yes, lie down on the plants. 269 00:31:02,322 --> 00:31:03,282 Are you lying down? 270 00:31:05,401 --> 00:31:06,341 Yes 271 00:31:08,331 --> 00:31:09,251 Good 272 00:31:09,911 --> 00:31:11,390 What is everything like around you? 273 00:31:14,300 --> 00:31:15,260 Green. 274 00:31:16,730 --> 00:31:18,249 It's all very green. 275 00:31:20,939 --> 00:31:21,749 Good 276 00:31:23,978 --> 00:31:25,728 Now will you do what I ask you? 277 00:31:28,408 --> 00:31:29,238 Yes 278 00:31:30,297 --> 00:31:31,477 What do you want me to do? 279 00:31:34,247 --> 00:31:35,257 I want you... 280 00:31:36,716 --> 00:31:38,526 To melt... into the green. 281 00:31:40,446 --> 00:31:41,436 Don't fight it. 282 00:31:42,835 --> 00:31:43,835 Just ... 283 00:31:44,015 --> 00:31:45,565 Turn green. 284 00:31:55,113 --> 00:31:57,293 No matter what happens you were there. You did it. 285 00:32:00,593 --> 00:32:02,492 Let fear come, if it likes. 286 00:32:03,022 --> 00:32:04,022 Remember. 287 00:32:04,222 --> 00:32:07,022 But the mind can concieve and believe it can achieve 288 00:32:58,663 --> 00:32:59,633 What's wrong? 289 00:33:00,503 --> 00:33:01,633 Ground is burning. 290 00:33:02,793 --> 00:33:04,262 The ground is not burning. 291 00:33:09,872 --> 00:33:10,771 Gotta go. 292 00:33:30,698 --> 00:33:31,708 I want to lie down. 293 00:33:32,878 --> 00:33:33,708 Just for a minute. 294 00:33:36,527 --> 00:33:37,487 Sure. 295 00:33:38,697 --> 00:33:39,727 Yea. We'll take a rest. 296 00:36:08,963 --> 00:36:10,013 Shouldn't we go home? 297 00:36:17,252 --> 00:36:18,272 Yeah 298 00:36:20,441 --> 00:36:21,381 Yeah, we should. 299 00:37:27,781 --> 00:37:28,730 Scared? 300 00:37:32,140 --> 00:37:33,170 Stay awake for me. 301 00:37:38,869 --> 00:37:39,769 Relax 302 00:37:40,818 --> 00:37:42,678 Stay ... stay in there. 303 00:40:47,729 --> 00:40:50,068 It's just stupid acorns 304 00:42:19,474 --> 00:42:20,414 What are you doing? 305 00:42:21,374 --> 00:42:22,314 I'm just ... 306 00:42:23,993 --> 00:42:26,983 Setting up... a little exercise. 307 00:42:28,493 --> 00:42:30,792 It's... It's like a ... 308 00:42:33,102 --> 00:42:34,262 It's like a game. 309 00:42:34,632 --> 00:42:36,012 You cheated me yesterday. 310 00:42:37,081 --> 00:42:38,261 Running is not good. 311 00:42:38,521 --> 00:42:40,901 ... You have to really feel the grass. 312 00:42:42,241 --> 00:42:43,720 I want you to go from this stone ... 313 00:42:45,760 --> 00:42:47,000 To this stone. 314 00:42:48,789 --> 00:42:50,149 Pretty scary, huh? 315 00:42:51,519 --> 00:42:52,439 You're ready? 316 00:42:54,079 --> 00:42:55,019 Yea 317 00:42:55,958 --> 00:42:56,948 I'll give you a ride. 318 00:42:58,708 --> 00:43:00,238 I'll put you on the first stone. 319 00:43:03,167 --> 00:43:04,657 Stay with me 320 00:43:06,167 --> 00:43:06,977 Here we go 321 00:43:07,517 --> 00:43:09,116 Put your foot down I got you. 322 00:43:09,616 --> 00:43:11,336 I got you I'm right here. 323 00:43:12,106 --> 00:43:13,136 I can't do this. 324 00:43:13,171 --> 00:43:14,355 Yes, you can. 325 00:43:15,035 --> 00:43:16,585 You can and you will. 326 00:43:16,735 --> 00:43:17,965 Just like I will. 327 00:43:18,115 --> 00:43:19,965 We're gonna walk together. 328 00:43:20,234 --> 00:43:21,614 We're gonna walk together, okay? 329 00:43:21,649 --> 00:43:22,744 Now ... 330 00:43:23,184 --> 00:43:24,744 Alright now, Breathe. 331 00:43:25,454 --> 00:43:26,743 Let's step off the rock. 332 00:43:27,613 --> 00:43:29,283 And step on that grass. 333 00:43:30,303 --> 00:43:31,163 Step down 334 00:43:31,683 --> 00:43:34,042 See? ... What happened? 335 00:43:34,372 --> 00:43:36,402 Keep breathing ... See? Keep breathing 336 00:43:36,472 --> 00:43:38,112 I've got you 337 00:43:38,147 --> 00:43:39,751 You're really doing great 338 00:43:39,791 --> 00:43:41,921 Okay? ... keep breathing. 339 00:43:41,956 --> 00:43:44,051 Five, five and five. 340 00:43:47,910 --> 00:43:48,980 You're almost there. 341 00:43:49,750 --> 00:43:51,480 You're almost there You're doing great 342 00:43:54,469 --> 00:43:55,649 ... Five. 343 00:44:00,568 --> 00:44:02,228 We're there ... We are there 344 00:44:02,338 --> 00:44:03,278 Here, told you 345 00:44:08,447 --> 00:44:09,607 You did it 346 00:44:13,196 --> 00:44:14,226 You learned something. 347 00:44:16,885 --> 00:44:18,025 Didn't you? 348 00:44:22,525 --> 00:44:23,504 You did beautiful. 349 00:44:25,644 --> 00:44:26,634 You did beautiful. 350 00:45:16,246 --> 00:45:17,776 I miss him so much ... 351 00:45:38,033 --> 00:45:39,712 I've been afraid of here before. 352 00:45:41,742 --> 00:45:43,562 Yes, it seems likely. 353 00:45:45,981 --> 00:45:47,491 I just didn't know it was fear. 354 00:45:52,970 --> 00:45:56,470 I became afraid ... and I stopped writing. 355 00:45:59,069 --> 00:46:01,259 What was different ... the last time? 356 00:46:07,588 --> 00:46:08,638 I heard a sound. 357 00:46:29,724 --> 00:46:30,684 Nick? 358 00:46:34,054 --> 00:46:35,213 Nick! 359 00:46:41,832 --> 00:46:42,922 Nick! 360 00:46:52,821 --> 00:46:53,651 Nick! 361 00:47:00,160 --> 00:47:00,989 Nick! 362 00:48:04,789 --> 00:48:06,289 You didn't hear Nick screaming. 363 00:48:10,528 --> 00:48:11,718 Apparently not. 364 00:48:12,218 --> 00:48:15,762 And because you experienced something that you can't explain rationally, 365 00:48:15,797 --> 00:48:18,307 You placed Eden very high on the pyramid chart. 366 00:48:23,856 --> 00:48:26,396 Eden was the catalyst that triggered your fear. 367 00:48:26,676 --> 00:48:28,395 You jumped to conclusions. 368 00:48:29,055 --> 00:48:31,425 Entitled the emotional event with a place. 369 00:48:33,195 --> 00:48:35,444 When you feel threat It's natural to react. 370 00:48:36,204 --> 00:48:37,604 If the danger were real ... 371 00:48:37,954 --> 00:48:39,434 Your fear would save your life. 372 00:48:39,764 --> 00:48:43,273 Because your adrenaline will be used for fight or flight. 373 00:48:45,033 --> 00:48:47,722 But what you're experiencing is panic, nothing more. 374 00:48:49,162 --> 00:48:50,532 The scream wasn't real 375 00:49:01,480 --> 00:49:02,550 Stop! 376 00:49:05,630 --> 00:49:07,229 Calm down. 377 00:49:08,149 --> 00:49:09,589 You shouldn't have come here. 378 00:49:11,209 --> 00:49:13,388 You're just so damn arrogant. 379 00:49:15,448 --> 00:49:17,088 But this may not last. 380 00:49:18,937 --> 00:49:20,117 Have you thought of that? 381 00:49:31,525 --> 00:49:34,515 Oak trees grow to be hundreds of years old 382 00:49:36,135 --> 00:49:39,824 They only have to produce one single tree, every hundred years. 383 00:49:40,334 --> 00:49:41,824 In order to perpetuate ... 384 00:49:42,344 --> 00:49:43,823 May sound benign to you but ... 385 00:49:44,453 --> 00:49:47,933 It was a big thing for me to realize that when I was out here with Nick. 386 00:49:54,352 --> 00:49:56,601 The acorns fell on the roof then too... 387 00:49:58,591 --> 00:50:01,351 Kept falling, and falling 388 00:50:02,750 --> 00:50:04,970 And dying ... and dying. 389 00:50:10,769 --> 00:50:12,139 And I understood that ... 390 00:50:14,659 --> 00:50:17,598 Everything that used to be beautiful about Eden 391 00:50:18,958 --> 00:50:20,468 Was perhaps hideous 392 00:50:23,657 --> 00:50:27,527 Now I could hear what I couldn't hear before. 393 00:50:30,866 --> 00:50:34,575 The cry of... all the things that are to die 394 00:50:39,515 --> 00:50:40,544 It's all... 395 00:50:41,614 --> 00:50:42,704 very touching 396 00:50:44,044 --> 00:50:45,914 If it was a children's book. 397 00:50:49,703 --> 00:50:51,333 acorns don't cry 398 00:50:53,232 --> 00:50:54,812 You know that as well as I do. 399 00:50:55,882 --> 00:50:57,362 That's what fear is. 400 00:50:58,832 --> 00:51:01,341 Your thoughts distort reality. 401 00:51:03,031 --> 00:51:04,531 Look the other way around ... 402 00:51:10,690 --> 00:51:12,089 Satan's Church 403 00:51:12,124 --> 00:51:13,489 Satan?... Jesus! 404 00:51:13,910 --> 00:51:15,382 Nature is Satan's Church. 405 00:51:17,319 --> 00:51:18,248 What? 406 00:51:21,708 --> 00:51:23,018 Well, there you have him 407 00:51:24,857 --> 00:51:26,037 That was his brother. 408 00:51:57,142 --> 00:51:57,972 Nick? 409 00:51:59,742 --> 00:52:01,772 He drifted away from me the last time. 410 00:52:04,611 --> 00:52:07,251 He was always out and about... 411 00:52:07,861 --> 00:52:10,960 He might have made more of an effort to be there for me. 412 00:54:10,421 --> 00:54:11,901 You look like you slept well. 413 00:54:13,251 --> 00:54:14,400 Thanks, I did. 414 00:54:21,319 --> 00:54:24,029 I just wanted to say how happy I am that you're here ... 415 00:54:28,118 --> 00:54:29,158 I love you darling... 416 00:54:38,537 --> 00:54:40,566 Did you have a good sleep? 417 00:54:42,836 --> 00:54:44,326 I've just been having a lot of ... 418 00:54:45,226 --> 00:54:46,325 crazy dreams ... 419 00:54:47,555 --> 00:54:50,355 Dreams are of no interest in modern psychology. 420 00:54:51,884 --> 00:54:53,454 Freud is dead, isn't he? 421 00:55:13,381 --> 00:55:14,581 What are you doing? 422 00:55:14,781 --> 00:55:16,011 Look! 423 00:55:18,560 --> 00:55:19,870 I'm well again. 424 00:55:28,639 --> 00:55:29,838 I'm cured. 425 00:55:32,198 --> 00:55:33,598 See? perfect. 426 00:55:36,977 --> 00:55:38,227 I'm fine. 427 00:55:45,046 --> 00:55:47,056 You can't just be happy for me, can you? 428 00:57:53,816 --> 00:57:56,875 Chaos ... reigns 429 00:58:07,018 --> 00:58:10,907 Chapter Three: The despair 430 01:02:06,865 --> 01:02:08,745 I want to do one more excercise. 431 01:02:09,245 --> 01:02:10,575 It's like a role play. 432 01:02:12,564 --> 01:02:13,554 My role ... 433 01:02:14,354 --> 01:02:15,474 Is .. 434 01:02:16,064 --> 01:02:17,984 All the thoughts that provoke your fear ... 435 01:02:18,833 --> 01:02:19,983 Yours ... 436 01:02:20,083 --> 01:02:21,303 is rational thinking. 437 01:02:26,942 --> 01:02:27,952 I am nature ... 438 01:02:29,412 --> 01:02:30,981 All the things that you call nature. 439 01:02:39,350 --> 01:02:41,030 Okay Mr.Nature 440 01:02:44,089 --> 01:02:45,319 what do you want? 441 01:02:49,099 --> 01:02:50,708 To hurt you as much as I can. 442 01:02:57,397 --> 01:02:58,297 How? 443 01:03:00,127 --> 01:03:01,287 How do you think? 444 01:03:08,785 --> 01:03:10,025 By Frightening me? 445 01:03:13,785 --> 01:03:14,815 By killing you. 446 01:03:17,964 --> 01:03:19,274 Nature can't hurt me. 447 01:03:20,314 --> 01:03:22,133 You just told you're the green in the outside... 448 01:03:22,523 --> 01:03:24,133 No, I'm more than that. 449 01:03:26,963 --> 01:03:28,142 I don't understand. 450 01:03:30,342 --> 01:03:32,492 I'm outside, but also... 451 01:03:36,181 --> 01:03:37,121 within 452 01:03:39,761 --> 01:03:41,510 I'm nature of all human beings 453 01:03:42,950 --> 01:03:44,440 Oh, That kind of nature. 454 01:03:49,549 --> 01:03:51,149 The kind of nature that... 455 01:03:51,239 --> 01:03:55,278 Causes people do the evil things against women 456 01:03:55,318 --> 01:03:57,088 That's exactly who I am. 457 01:03:57,618 --> 01:04:00,587 That kind of nature interested me a lot. 458 01:04:01,237 --> 01:04:02,507 When I was uphere 459 01:04:03,887 --> 01:04:06,746 That kind of nature was the subject to my thesis ... 460 01:04:09,896 --> 01:04:12,125 But you shouldn't underestimate Eden. 461 01:04:15,185 --> 01:04:16,205 What did Eden do? 462 01:04:17,195 --> 01:04:20,204 I discovered somethng else in my material than I expected. 463 01:04:23,064 --> 01:04:25,313 If human nature is evil... 464 01:04:26,523 --> 01:04:28,133 Then that goes as well... 465 01:04:28,168 --> 01:04:30,133 That the nature ... 466 01:04:31,112 --> 01:04:32,132 of the women. 467 01:04:34,912 --> 01:04:36,042 Female nature. 468 01:04:36,412 --> 01:04:38,561 The nature of all the sisters. 469 01:04:41,311 --> 01:04:43,760 Women do not control their own bodies 470 01:04:44,130 --> 01:04:45,510 Nature does. 471 01:04:46,810 --> 01:04:48,830 I have it in writing in my books. 472 01:04:49,589 --> 01:04:51,759 The literature you used in your office search... 473 01:04:51,909 --> 01:04:54,954 Was about evil things committed against women. 474 01:04:54,989 --> 01:04:57,888 But you read it as proof of the evil of women? 475 01:04:58,608 --> 01:05:01,917 You were supposed to be critical of those says That was your thesis 476 01:05:02,697 --> 01:05:04,357 Instead you're embracing it 477 01:05:05,147 --> 01:05:06,607 Do you know what you're saying? 478 01:05:08,686 --> 01:05:09,756 Forget it. 479 01:05:10,456 --> 01:05:12,116 I do not know why I said it. 480 01:05:13,586 --> 01:05:15,375 It can't work anymore now. 481 01:05:27,103 --> 01:05:28,353 Hit me. 482 01:05:29,283 --> 01:05:30,223 What? 483 01:05:30,333 --> 01:05:32,223 Hit me so it hurts ... 484 01:05:32,913 --> 01:05:33,902 No. 485 01:05:34,092 --> 01:05:35,452 Hit me, please. 486 01:05:35,802 --> 01:05:36,742 No! 487 01:05:37,202 --> 01:05:38,882 I can't stand it 488 01:05:39,541 --> 01:05:40,881 I do not want to 489 01:05:41,001 --> 01:05:42,421 I do not want to... 490 01:05:53,429 --> 01:05:54,979 Then you don't love me. 491 01:05:58,219 --> 01:05:59,808 Okay 492 01:06:00,728 --> 01:06:02,078 Maybe I don't love you. 493 01:06:02,088 --> 01:06:02,998 Yeah 494 01:06:57,769 --> 01:06:59,019 Again ... 495 01:06:59,649 --> 01:07:00,899 Again. 496 01:07:05,948 --> 01:07:07,797 This is too from nature's spell ... 497 01:07:08,197 --> 01:07:09,797 Could start a hail storm ... 498 01:07:51,960 --> 01:07:54,910 I'm not gonna continue this if you don't listen to me. 499 01:07:56,770 --> 01:07:58,859 Good... and evil. 500 01:07:59,449 --> 01:08:01,249 Have nothing to do with therapy. 501 01:08:03,409 --> 01:08:07,908 You know how many innocent women were killed in the sixteenth century alone 502 01:08:08,058 --> 01:08:09,348 just for being women? 503 01:08:09,958 --> 01:08:11,347 I'm sure you do... Many. 504 01:08:12,917 --> 01:08:14,657 Not because they were evil... 505 01:08:16,147 --> 01:08:17,016 I know. 506 01:08:18,086 --> 01:08:19,876 It's just sometimes I forget. 507 01:08:23,855 --> 01:08:26,805 The evil you talk about is an obsession. 508 01:08:27,725 --> 01:08:30,894 Obsessions never materialize. It's a scientific fact. 509 01:08:32,164 --> 01:08:36,073 Anxieties can't trick you into doing things you won't do otherwise... 510 01:08:36,108 --> 01:08:37,218 It's like hypnotizing you 511 01:08:37,253 --> 01:08:40,393 You can't be hypnotized into doin something you wouldn't... 512 01:08:41,353 --> 01:08:43,612 Normally do. Something against your nature. 513 01:08:46,362 --> 01:08:47,342 You understand me? 514 01:08:48,241 --> 01:08:49,551 Yeah, I think so. 515 01:08:49,731 --> 01:08:52,541 You think so? You don't have to understand me, just trust me. 516 01:09:12,838 --> 01:09:13,887 What's this? 517 01:09:14,576 --> 01:09:16,829 It's from the medical officer It's a copy of the autopsy report. 518 01:09:20,886 --> 01:09:21,866 The autopsy? 519 01:09:24,466 --> 01:09:26,145 They performed an autopsy? 520 01:09:26,995 --> 01:09:28,985 I didn't wanna tell you, because you weren't feeling well. 521 01:09:31,735 --> 01:09:32,574 Well 522 01:09:32,704 --> 01:09:33,994 What did they find? 523 01:09:35,394 --> 01:09:36,834 Nothing that would have any ... 524 01:09:37,204 --> 01:09:38,473 bearing on the case. 525 01:09:39,803 --> 01:09:41,263 The only abnormality 526 01:09:41,483 --> 01:09:43,898 in the victim is a slight deformity 527 01:09:43,933 --> 01:09:47,012 of the bones in his feet, of an earlier date 528 01:09:49,002 --> 01:09:51,901 We did not attention a significance to this. 529 01:10:06,179 --> 01:10:09,429 You were rather to put Nick's shoes on wrong in this picture? 530 01:10:15,238 --> 01:10:16,137 Well 531 01:10:18,337 --> 01:10:21,277 How I would?! 532 01:10:22,407 --> 01:10:23,876 A slip of the mind that day? 533 01:10:24,376 --> 01:10:25,296 I wish 534 01:11:33,175 --> 01:11:34,305 Herself. 535 01:11:37,984 --> 01:11:40,784 Bastard. You're leaving me, aren't you? 536 01:11:42,434 --> 01:11:43,814 get off me, bastard. 537 01:11:45,103 --> 01:11:46,263 You're leaving me. 538 01:11:46,483 --> 01:11:47,533 I'm not. 539 01:11:47,813 --> 01:11:48,938 I'm helping you. 540 01:11:48,973 --> 01:11:50,632 - You're leaving me, aren't you? - No! 541 01:12:05,070 --> 01:12:07,080 - I love you. - I don't believe you! 542 01:12:07,115 --> 01:12:08,260 Yes 543 01:12:08,520 --> 01:12:10,029 I don't believe you! 544 01:12:10,230 --> 01:12:12,030 I don't fucking believe you! 545 01:17:16,141 --> 01:17:17,261 Where are you? 546 01:17:21,040 --> 01:17:22,170 You bastard! 547 01:17:23,709 --> 01:17:24,779 Where are you? 548 01:17:34,308 --> 01:17:35,288 Where are you? 549 01:17:49,645 --> 01:17:50,695 Where are you? 550 01:17:59,924 --> 01:18:00,894 Where are you? 551 01:18:06,743 --> 01:18:07,792 You bastard! 552 01:18:19,241 --> 01:18:20,151 Where are you? 553 01:18:23,720 --> 01:18:24,770 Where are you? 554 01:18:29,179 --> 01:18:30,429 How dare you leave me? 555 01:18:42,147 --> 01:18:44,157 You said you wanted to help me. 556 01:18:45,856 --> 01:18:47,086 Where are you? 557 01:18:50,946 --> 01:18:51,885 Where are you? 558 01:20:14,662 --> 01:20:15,742 Where are you? 559 01:20:20,721 --> 01:20:21,901 You bastard! 560 01:21:33,410 --> 01:21:34,430 Get out! 561 01:21:34,960 --> 01:21:36,749 Get out! You bastard! 562 01:21:38,279 --> 01:21:39,409 Get out! 563 01:21:41,319 --> 01:21:42,678 You bastard! 564 01:21:43,438 --> 01:21:44,508 Get out! 565 01:21:46,958 --> 01:21:47,997 Get out! 566 01:22:08,454 --> 01:22:09,664 Get out! 567 01:22:11,894 --> 01:22:13,043 You bastard! 568 01:22:15,043 --> 01:22:16,093 Get out! 569 01:23:16,443 --> 01:23:17,483 Sorry. 570 01:24:03,986 --> 01:24:07,935 You gotta get this thing off... my leg 571 01:24:29,852 --> 01:24:31,062 I can't find the wrench. 572 01:25:36,281 --> 01:25:37,441 Did you want to kill me? 573 01:25:39,291 --> 01:25:40,301 Not yet 574 01:25:43,650 --> 01:25:45,310 The three beggars aren't here yet. 575 01:25:46,769 --> 01:25:47,809 The three beggars? 576 01:25:50,699 --> 01:25:51,749 What does that mean? 577 01:25:53,628 --> 01:25:55,338 When the three beggars arrive ... 578 01:25:56,198 --> 01:25:57,338 Someone must die. 579 01:26:00,697 --> 01:26:01,677 I see. 580 01:26:26,013 --> 01:26:28,423 The crying woman is a scheming woman. 581 01:26:40,331 --> 01:26:43,740 False in legs False in thighs 582 01:26:45,790 --> 01:26:49,420 False in breasts Teeth, hair and eyes 583 01:28:41,642 --> 01:28:42,682 Hold me 584 01:28:47,201 --> 01:28:48,181 Hold me 585 01:30:12,687 --> 01:30:14,777 There is no such constellation. 586 01:30:42,462 --> 01:30:43,872 None of it is any use 587 01:30:44,162 --> 01:30:45,662 Not good. 588 01:30:51,651 --> 01:30:52,671 No!