Oh, God, she's perfect.
Perfect?
-Dawson, you disappoint me. -Look at her. Those eyes. That hair.
I grant you that the girl has certain physical attributes...
...but nothing so original or mysterious to warrant perfection.
Okay, easy.
A face like that leaves nothing to the imagination.
The well-maintained good looks of an upper-middle-class New Yorker--
There's no mystery there. I can see her entire future in that face.
-Really? -Yeah.
In three years, her above-average SAT scores will grant her admission...
...into a small liberal arts college, somewhere in New England...
...where she'll major in art history...
...before returning to Manhattan to marry a bond trader she meets...
...some Saturday afternoon at an America's Cup watching party.
Within a year, they move to suburban Connecticut, refurbish an old...
...farmhouse, and raise three neurotically perfect children.
You've put quite a bit of thought into this.
Not really. It's just so obvious.
Well, Nostradamus, I think I'd prefer to let Jen surprise me, okay?
Suit yourself. Just trying to save you some time.
Can you hand me that B-roll over there?
I'm taking suggestions on what to get my parents for an anniversary gift.
I'm at a loss. What do you get two people who've spent every day...
...together for the past 20 years?
Offhand, I'd say separate vacations.
Dawson, I know your cinematic influences are still evolving...
...but I never anticipated a Russ Meyer phase.
I didn't shoot this.
I think we found the perfect anniversary gift, Dawson.
-What is this? -I don't know.
I swear, I didn't shoot it. I....
I must've left the camera running when we ran out of the ruins.
You know, it's not without a certain quality.
Very watchable.
Yeah.
It's funny. That woman looks familiar.
I know what you mean.
If you brushed her hair out of her eyes a little....
And maybe sat her behind a big school desk?
It could almost be....
-Ms. Jacobs. -Ms. Jacobs.
So there she is, on tape, doing it with some guy.
Ms. Jacobs, as in sixth-period English Ms. Jacobs?
-The very same. -Wait a minute.
What are you talking about? You have a tape of Tamara?
I'm sorry, Pacey. I know you thought she was saving herself for you, but....
I was shooting some pickups at the ruins with Jen, and we left...
...the camera running when we ran out, and the rest is pornographic history.
God, that's really strange.
You can't tell who that guy is or anything, can you?
Standard over-the-shoulder shot. We can't see the guy's face.
If you're thinking of tracking him down, look for the guy with...
...brown hair and throbbing neck muscles.
Hey, Dawson, I think I should get to take a look at that tape.
Sure. We'll arrange a private screening for you.
Yeah, so you can flog the bishop in privacy.
That's really clever how you turn all that sexual repression into humor.
You know what, you guys? I'm late.
I should get going before Grams puts out an APB.
I'll walk with you.
-Later, kids. -Don't forget. I wanna see that tape.
-Pervert. -Prude.
Pacey talks a lot. Like he's got all this experience. It's a lot of bluster.
Someone once said that the more a person talks about it...
...the worse they are at it.
I hardly ever talk about it.
I know. That's why I keep sticking around.
You know what, Dawson?
Now may not be the best time for this.
-I take it we're not alone. -Practically a ménage à trois.
Just look at it this way, Dawson, repressing desire...
...can only make it more powerful.
So I figure the next time I see you, we are in for one titanic kiss.
-If I can survive the wait. -It's not waiting. It's anticipation.
Screw it.
Do you do these things to upset me, Jennifer?
-It was only a kiss, Grams. -Only a kiss.
I seem to remember a lot of trouble back in New York...
...starting after only a kiss.
Your definition of trouble is broader than anyone's I know.
Then why don't you tell me why you think your parents sent you here.
Why don't you remind me again.
I haven't heard a recitation of my sins for, what, 15 minutes now?
I don't do this to torture you.
I do it so you won't stray down the same path twice.
You know what? Grams, I'm bored of this.
Of the way we talk to each other. Of these conversations we have...
...that go round in these incredibly pedestrian circles...
...and we say the same things over and over again.
So let's just end this right now.
What you saw outside with me and Dawson.... Grams, it was only a kiss.
Only a kiss.
How could you have never seen that before?
I have never seen it before. I swear to God.
You're kidding. I mean, after 20 years of marriage--
Not 20 yet. Not until Monday.
Hey, Dawson, listen to this.
Your mother just told me that she has never before seen...
...the scar underneath my chin.
The one you got from that moped accident 10 years ago?
Yes. Thank you, Dawson. Thank you very much.
Now, you see there? My son knows my face better than you do.
Maybe you should start coming home early...
...see my face in the daylight for a change.
Don't bother. I'll show myself out.
Pacey.
-What are you doing? -The tape.
-What tape? Ms. Jacobs? -Yes, the Ms. Jacobs tape!
Stop! Dude, you're messing up my dailies.
I told you I'd show you the tape. You couldn't wait?
No, guess not.
Dude, I knew you had it bad for her, but calm down.
This is not such a big deal.
There you go. Mad dog.
-Dawson. -Yeah?
You know, maybe I haven't been entirely honest with you lately.
I mean, not that I've lied to you or anything.
I've just withheld some details.
Okay.
Well, I'm not cursed with self-awareness like you are, Dawson...
...but I know enough to know how people see me. I mean....
I'm not the guy who gets the girl.
The guy who talks about it, but not the guy who gets her.
Enough people say that stuff about you...
...and you start to believe it yourself.
I'm not quite following you here, Pacey.
-I got the girl this time, Dawson. -What?
Yeah. Call it the law of averages, call it an act of God...
...call it whatever you want, but I got her.
Who? Who? Who'd you get, Pacey?
Oh, man....
You know what, Dawson, I don't know how to tell you this, but....
The guy with the brown hair and the throbbing neck muscles...
...the guy with Tamara Jacobs...
...that's me.
-No. -Yeah.
I'm not just talking this time, Dawson, though I wish I was...
...because, off the top of my head, I can think of 40 reasons...
...why this tape could ruin my life.
Not the least of which is the embarrassment factor.
No guy's first time should be captured on video.
Are you crazy?
I don't think there exists a word to describe my reaction.
But I like her, Dawson. I really do.
And it's not just the sex, man.
I don't know. Maybe this is too improbable or bizarre to ever work out.
Bizarre might be a word, yeah.
Yeah.
This....
This is gonna sound a little strange, but....
On the tape, was--?
I mean....
Did I look all right?
Performance-wise, did I cut it, man?
Yeah. You did fine, man.
I mean, from what I could tell. Yeah.
You did fine.
Cool, man.
Thanks.
And don't tell anybody yet.
All right.
You could get them some candlesticks...
...a nice picture frame, maybe a piece of folk art.
Do you think they'd like something like that?
Dawson, your parents are middle-aged, white suburbanites.
They live for folk art.
You should see my parents lately. It's disgusting. They're like....
Half the time they're making out or dry-humping in the living room.
You know, it's sad. I'm actually jealous of my parents' sex life.
What do you mean? Blondie isn't giving you any?
I thought by now you would've....
You're a real romantic, aren't you, Joey?
I don't think you're going to get anywhere unless you off...
...the wicked grandmother, but....
Mom?
Mom.
Dawson! Hello.
Joey.
What are you do--? Well, this is a surprise.
-What brings you out here? -We're just doing some shopping.
I'm sorry. Dawson, this is--
-Bob Collinsworth. -Yeah. Six and 11, right?
-Right. -And Joey.
-Hi. -Real thrill.
Your mom was just helping me out with a little wardrobe problem.
Seems the station research has indicated that while viewers like me...
...they hate my sport coats.
Anyway, it's wonderful to finally meet you, Dawson.
Your mother's told me about your film.
Being a bit of an indie fan myself...
...I'd love to take a look at it whenever it's done.
Sure. Okay, yeah.
Bob, we really should get back to the prep session.
She's right. Take care.
Pleasure to meet you both.
See you at home, honey.
-Bye, Mom. -Goodbye, Joey.
When I first saw Bob on television, I thought he was a real tool...
...but, I don't know, now that I've met him, he doesn't seem so bad.
-What do you think? -I think you had it right the first time.
Dare I ask?
Your worst fears are founded, Grams. I'm going to see Dawson.
You know, maybe I'm asking for it...
...but I would rather you say whatever it is you're thinking...
...than continue to look at me the way you are right now.
-He only wants one thing from you. -No. That's not Dawson at all.
He's completely sweet and honest and romantic--
Him and that Potter girl....
The way she climbs in his bedroom window.
-I don't even want to hazard a guess. -No.
Dawson and Joey are just friends.
Maybe there's some of that sexual tension thing that happens when...
...a guy and a girl have been friends for so long, but that's as far as it goes.
And as far as Dawson and me, Grams...
...you saw the entire highlight reel yesterday afternoon.
So I'd be correct in assuming you have certain feelings for him?
Yeah, you would.
Well, nothing can be done about that.
I only hope you can avoid making the mistakes...
...that you and I both know girls your age often make.
You know, you always find a way to get that last dig in, don't you?
Jennifer, you exasperate me.
Everything I say isn't meant as criticism.
No, I know. Some of it's meant as judgment.
-Hey, Tamara. -Hi. Well, this is a surprise.
I saw you sitting here. I thought I'd come on over.
-Well, I'm glad you did. -Well, what you reading?
Just the approved 10th-grade reading curriculum.
I'm trying to choose the next book for our class. Any suggestions?
How about something with action in it this time?
-Action? -Yeah. Sex.
What is our school board so afraid of?
We're practically adults now. We can handle this stuff.
A few blue novels are not gonna kill us.
Pacey, every piece of literature...
...that you'll read this year will have sex in it.
-Everything last year probably as well. -Yeah, but it's not real sex.
I mean, it's sex as cautionary tale.
Sex as a warning. I'm not kidding about this.
Every time somebody in one of those books has sex...
...something bad has to happen.
Romeo and Juliet.
They have sex, next thing you know, they kill themselves.
The Scarlet Letter?
Hester Prynne has sex, next thing you know, she's an outcast for life.
The Greek one. The....
-Oedipus? -Yes. That one.
That guy sleeps with some chick, who, granted, is his mother.
He's so freaked out by it, he pokes out his own eyes.
Okay? That's not real life.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but it has been known to happen...
...that every once in a while, two people sleep together, they enjoy it...
...and afterward everything works out fine.
You really think that is possible?
Steven?
All right. Reaction.
-And I want complete honesty. -Well, if--
But before you say anything...
...just know that your opinion means a lot to me and if you hate it...
...I can't anticipate the downward spiral it might send me on.
Well, my pathetic shriek aside, I think it's really good, Dawson.
Very promising, and I'm sure it's gonna turn out great.
-Great? -Really great.
I still have a lot of pre-dubbing to do tomorrow.
I'm going to go down to my mom's station.
They let me use the equipment down there without too much hassle. So....
But-- Would you like to come along?
-Yeah. That sounds cool. -Yeah?
Really?
Why are you so surprised every time I jump at the chance...
...to spend time with you?
I don't know. Natural skepticism, perhaps?
Well, get over it. Not everything in life has to be so complicated.
In old movies, whenever two characters were in bed together...
...the censors always made one of them keep one foot on the floor.
Which I never understood. I figured if the characters...
...were clever enough, they could still do almost anything.
Dawson. Dawson. We've got plenty of time to prove our censors wrong.
We don't have to make our case today.
All right?
Okay.
All right. That was great.
-Could we see that with picture? -Sure. Yeah.
-Seen your mom this morning yet? -No, I'll track her down later.
Okay, here we go.
We'll go again. This time, more shock, less anger.
All right. More shock, less anger. Okay.
-I'm sorry, Dawson. I.... -Okay. We'll take a break.
I'm sorry if I was being a perfectionist in there.
I get like that sometimes.
No. I like a man who knows what he wants.
Really? Sort of like me?
Sort of.
Dawson, look. There's your mom.
Come on.
Look, I know that your head must be spinning right now, and....
I don't know. Maybe one of the things you're thinking is how unfair it is...
...that right now, when you need to talk to someone most...
...you're kind of stuck here with little more than a semi-stranger.
But we always seem to have something to say to each other...
...even if our conversations are more banter than real talk.
You know, fun and sweet and everything, but kind of on the surface.
What I'm trying to say is....
Is that if you want to talk to somebody about this, I mean really talk...
...even though I know we've never done that before...
...I'd really like to be that person.
I need to talk to you.
Okay.
What I should really do is tell my dad.
"Dad, the woman you're about to celebrate 20 blissful years...
...of marriage with.... She's sleeping with Bob now.
Apparently, the scent of his Aqua Velva was too much to resist."
I think we both know that's not the best idea, Dawson.
God, I joked about them having an affair, but I was never serious. I--
Wonder what the rate of adultery is in this town? Your parents, my parents.
We live in this Norman Rockwell town...
...with whitewashed fences and beachfront houses...
...and underneath, it's....
Do you think people know?
People always know.
Well, we didn't.
Right?
Joey?
Joey, I didn't know.
Did you?
You knew.
You-- How could you not say anything?
Why? So you could hate me for telling you?
Because you know that's what would've happened.
Besides, I thought you would've seen it by now.
What?
You're a pretty perceptive guy, usually...
...but I think we can agree you've been preoccupied--
-What are you talking about? -I'll give you a hint.
Blond hair, about the last stages of a B cup.
Don't turn this into a discussion about Jen. Joey, you lied to me.
I didn't know how to--
-What, are you threatened by Jen? -Threatened, Dawson?
No, I'm not threatened. I'm bored.
You're bored. So you lie to me to curb your own boredom.
I was trying to be your friend.
What you did was not the action of a friend. What you did...
...let me make this clear, is disengage this friendship.
No, Dawson. I was trying, and--
I didn't know how to....
Struggling for something to say, Joey?
At a loss for words? Don't worry. Your actions are far more articulate.
Bye! See you later.
Have a nice life.
-Hi, Dawson. -Hi.
I didn't see you at the station yesterday. I thought you would say hi.
-Things got a little crazy, you know. -Sorry I missed you.
Honey, something bothering you?
No. Fine.
Well, I don't believe you.
You've never been very good at disguising that look...
...you get when something is bothering you.
Okay, let me guess.
One of the many women in your life has got your head spinning.
Yeah, something like that.
Dawson?
Yes, what can I help you with?
Two things, actually.
First, I know you don't like me and you look at me as some sex-crazed...
...teenager looking to corrupt your granddaughter, but I assure you...
...that's not the case. Not at all.
What's the second thing?
I'm here to pick up Jen.
Jennifer!
Maybe it's me. Maybe I have these old-fashioned ideas about fidelity.
Which I obviously inherited from my father's side of the family.
I'm sorry. Am I starting to bore you?
-No. -Because I'm starting to bore myself.
No, not at all, Dawson. I mean....
You know, I'm glad that we can talk about this.
I was hurt earlier when you wouldn't say a word to me, and I was sure...
...you ran to pour your heart out to Joey.
Well, I won't make that mistake again.
Do me a favor? Promise you'll always be up-front and honest with me.
-Okay. -That's not just a passing remark.
I firmly believe that secrets destroy.
They wound and hurt and kill and....
I really want us to have a chance.
Okay? No secrets between us ever.
Yeah. Yeah. I mean.... But don't you think that in certain situations...
...there are things that people just don't wanna know?
No. Even if my mom had fallen out of love with my dad...
...she should've been honest--
I'm not talking about your parents.
I mean, come on. Don't you ever wonder why two months ago...
...why I suddenly come to live up here?
You told me it's because your grandfather's sick...
...and your grandmother needed your help.
My grandmother's been an RN for the past 40 years.
The only thing I can help her with is staying out of her way.
Okay. So why are you here?
-Honesty, right? -Yeah.
Look, my parents didn't exactly send me up here to help out Grams.
They sent me up here because the clichés...
...about teenagers in the big city are true.
What clichés?
Come on, you've heard them.
They grow up too fast, stay out too late, hang out with the wrong...
...kind of people, have sex too young.
And your parents wanted to get you away from kids like that?
No, Dawson. I was kids like that.
-The sex part? -Yeah.
Boyfriend, right?
Yeah, but not just him.
Okay.
So that stuff you said about being a virgin, I should probably disregard.
You know what? Maybe I'm just being completely...
...self-destructive here because I like you, and I know the timing is off...
...and everything, but this is at your request.
And you're right.
We should be honest, and you should know who you're dating.
-You're okay with this, right? -Yeah.
I mean, the way I thought you were talking it was gonna be worse.
Dawson?
-What? -Would you hold my hand?
Yeah. Sure.
I'll see you later.
Hey, you know, I missed you this morning.
Came in early. Movie stuff, you know.
I'm feeling like blowing off my lab report.
Want to go to a movie or something?
That sounds great, but, you know, I'm so behind in my homework...
...I don't think my GPA can afford it.
Okay. Well, maybe just a quick study break then.
-Okay. Yeah, I'll call you. -Yeah?
-Definitely. Yeah. -Look, about what we talked about--
Jen, I've really got to go, okay? But I'll talk to you later.
Yeah. Later.
Question of the day:
If someone is having an affair with multiple partners...
...should they tell both partners of the arrangement?
An informal survey, Pacey?
This is relevant, what with STDs and AIDS running rampant...
...not to mention the moral implications.
No. I agree.
If you were involved with someone else, I'd want to know.
Me? No, no, no. You don't turn this around on me.
-Don't turn what around? -The issue.
And what's that?
Well, do you like him or do you like me?
You're disarming when you sound your age.
I saw you at lunch yesterday...
...and today in the hallway laughing together.
The way you brush his arm.
Who's it gonna be, Tamara, me or Mr. Gold?
You know, I never knew you were so bothered by this, Pacey...
...because I'd hate to think I have to choose.
I mean, Benji and I have so much in common.
We love to talk about books and authors and...
...we're both big opera fans...
...not to mention our legendary man troubles.
Man troubles?
Yes. Apparently, in your extensive research, you failed to detect...
...that I'm not exactly Benji's type.
No?
Not unless you think I bear some resemblance to Mel Gibson.
Mr. Gold is gay?
That's not to be repeated.
So, I don't understand.
Yesterday at the café when I tried to hold your hand....
And because we were in a public place where any number of students...
...or teachers or parents could see us, I didn't let you?
Pacey.
If you're confused about us...
...if you're trying to make sense out of what's happening between us...
...the best I can tell you is, so am I.
Yeah? Really?
Yes. Really.
Hey.
I think you owe me about seven-eighths of a conversation.
Yeah, I guess I do.
I mean, it's probably just my own pathetic insecurity...
...but I wanted a quick postmortem on last night, make sure you're...
...okay on what we talked about.
I'm fine with it.
Really?
Yeah, I mean, besides, Jen, it's in the past. It's over and done with.
Even if I did have a problem, what could I do?
-You could tell me. -Tell you what, Jen?
I don't know what you want me to say.
Let me help out. You could tell me why you've been avoiding me...
...or what's behind that look.
Whether it's repulsion or jealousy or complete disapproval...
...because I know I've never seen it from you before.
You could tell me you suddenly feel strange about us, that we need...
...a break because you don't seem to know me, and maybe you never did.
Or-- And now I'll make it really easy for you, Dawson--
You could just tell me if I've left anything out.
I didn't think so.
-So it wouldn't bother you? -Why would it bother me?
Because she's not a virgin. She's had sex with other guys.
This is what I don't understand about you, Dawson.
If the woman I was hot for came up to me and in some confessional way...
...told me she wasn't a virgin....
Don't you see what she's doing?
No.
-You don't see it? -I don't.
She's giving you an in, Dawson.
She's saying, "I understand, you're nervous about making...
...the first move on me because you're some romantic who puts women...
...like me up on a pedestal. So, here, I'm gonna give you the greatest gift...
...any desirable woman can give to a sexually inexperienced guy."
-An in? -Exactly!
She's saying she wants it just as bad as you.
Your carnal needs are reciprocal.
This is not about sex, Pacey, it's about romance.
God, you've no idea what I'm talking about, do you?
Yeah, I do.
No, you don't, because what I was gonna say before this...
...world-according-to-Pacey speech is that this has nothing to do with...
...getting Jen in the sack. It has to do with one thing--
Right. The fact that you're scared.
Listen. Dawson, the Jen Lindley that you have built up in your mind...
...does not entirely exist, okay?
In your movies she can be whatever you want, but in real life...
...the scripts got thrown out.
-So it seems. -Listen....
All I can say is enjoy it, man. Life has some pretty unexpected benefits.
Yeah.
I could do without all the unexpected plot twists though.
-The virginal girlfriend.... -Who's not exactly a virgin.
The high-school strike-out artist....
Who's having an affair with his teacher.
Then there's the happily married couple who's celebrating their 20th...
...wedding anniversary tonight who's really not as happy as we thought.
Yeah. That sucks, man.
-So did you talk to your mom? -Nope. Change of plan.
Dawson, I thought you said you were gonna tell her.
I'm gonna tell my dad.
-Hey. -Hey.
-I didn't hear you come in. -I'm not surprised.
So tonight's the big night, huh?
Do you have any idea how long 20 years is?
And that doesn't include the four years we dated.
I got to talk to you about--
Most of our college friends are already on their second marriages by now.
We all got married at the same time...
...early 20s, which is young by today's--
I admit there's a strong possibility this is not the right time--
But, you know, after 20 years, I can still say the same thing I did then.
Can't imagine my life without her.
Dad....
-What? -There's something I gotta tell you.
Well, sounds serious. What is it?
It is, and I know this is the wrong time, but--
Hi, Dawson.
-I'll be ready in a second, honey. -Okay, fine.
Dawson, I'm listening.
Happy anniversary, Dad.
Have a great time.
That I will.
Hi.
Sorry, kitchen's closed.
Well, if you can survive the shock, I actually came to see you.
I need some advice.
And what field do you consider me an expert in?
Dawson Leery.
You know, I'm sort of busy here with these receipts and locking up.
-Maybe we could do this another-- -I told him I wasn't a virgin.
I think I have a minute.
It's just that he seemed so disappointed in me, which...
...of course, made me angry and....
Now I don't know where we are.
Well.... Let me tell you about Dawson.
Granted he's articulate for his age, but he's not exactly mature.
I mean, he's the classic only child.
He pouts when things don't go his way...
...and only sees in black and white.
-Anything else confuses him. -Yeah.
When it comes to women...
...there are popes who've had more experience.
I mean, the guy was a shrimp until last summer.
To say his sex life is limited is the understatement of the decade.
It's barren. A desert.
I don't envy what you have to deal with, believe me.
You're not trying to scare me off, are you?
No.
I'm trying to tell you that every guy who grows up to be one of the good ones...
...he was probably a dweeb with girls when he was 15 too.
So, what would you do?
Same as you.
I'd get hurt. Mad. Confused.
Ask people for advice.
Maybe the wrong people, and then I'd wait.
For what?
For him to grow up. Come around.
Everything.
And how long does that take?
Don't go by me.
I'd probably be stupid enough to wait forever.
Mind a little company?
Can I ask you a question?
How old are you, Tamara, like, 35?
Something like that.
And you've been with other guys, right?
Some, yes.
A lot?
Well, not a lot that mattered.
And how many was that?
That mattered? You want numbers?
Well, let's see.
There was one in high school, and one in college...
...and since then, I'd say, there've been three.
But no one for a few years.
Great. Thanks.
Pacey.
Yeah?
About the one in high school?
I didn't mean my high school.
Well, it's been another busy week here in Capeside.
Last two people I ever thought would agree on anything, now do.
Both Grams and Dawson officially think I'm a slut.
You know, between you and me, I don't even know what the big deal is.
I mean, in two years, nearly 55 percent of my peers will have had sex...
...and in five years, it'll be almost 100, and nobody will care when I did it.
But as for now, it's an unfortunate and major deal.
Who knows...
...maybe by the time you wake up a 15-year-old girl with a shady past...
...won't be such a bad thing.
Hanging out with all your friends?
Yeah. That's why you weren't invited.
Phasers on stun. I come in peace.
-You're gonna screw it up, you know. -What?
Jen.
She came and talked to me. I told her, sit tight, he'll be back.
Thanks, appreciate it, Joey.
I explained to her that it's displaced anger...
...and you're just mad at your mom and dad.
I'm mad at the world, Joey. I'm a teenager.
And by the way, we're old pals now, Blondie and I, so if you have...
...any messages you want to get to her, let me know--
Look, whatever you've done, thanks, but I just don't want...
...to talk about it right now.
With you.
Come on. Passing up a chance to dish about the girl of your dreams?
-That's what you do with friends. -It is.
Except I'm not sure that we are.
How droll.
The tables have been turned.
This isn't just about yesterday, Joey. It's last week, last month. It--
Everything between us recently. We just--
We're not getting along the same way we used to.
So the friendship-- You don't think we're friends anymore?
I don't know. Are we more? Are we less? I--
All I know is, it's just not the way it used to be.
Nothing is anymore.
It's called social evolution, Dawson.
What's strong enough flourishes...
...and what doesn't we look at behind glass cases in science museums.
You and I?
Are we museum bound?
I don't know about that.
-You get angry at me too easily. -You're way too critical to me.
In some alternate universe, we must have been married, like, 50 years.
-I'm sure it was a wonderful wedding. -The best.
We each brought dates, I assume.
Yeah, Jen was by my side throughout.
And at the end of the evening, the inevitable question.
Who do you take home? The date or the wife?
-A dilemma. -But fascinating.
Faced with the choice you stood, surveying your options.
Your eyes drifted slowly...
...from her...
...to me.
Then back to her.
Then back to you?
Yeah, but I was having a drink with the rich guy at the bar.
Until moneybags got fresh, and you needed somebody to bail you out.
Really?
-I don't remember that part. -I do. Clear as day. Absolutely.
You were definitely in need of a rescue.
And were you man enough?
Did you set aside your clear-headed analysis of the situation and act?
Did we save each other that night, Dawson?
You know, it gets so hazy at this point, I really can't remember.
Couldn't tell you.
Well, when it comes back to you, I'd certainly be curious to hear...
...how it all ended.
You'll be my first call.
Well, good night, Dawson.
All this subtext is making me tired.
Dawson?
Yeah?
No matter how the wedding turned out...
...I'm pretty sure I had a wonderful time up until the end.
Yeah.
Me too.
No doubt about it.
Straight to the Smithsonian.