PREVIOUSLY ON BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER.
- LOOK AT YOU. ALL AFRAID I'M HOT FOR YOUR HONEY. - BECAUSE YOU ARE.
[ Spike ] "THEY HAD TO BE CERTAIN THE SLAYER WOULD PROTECT IT WITH HER LIFE,
SO THEY SENT THE KEY TO HER IN THE FORM OF A SISTER."
- I'M NOT REAL. - YOU'RE THE KEY.
GO. BEFORE SHE FINDS YOU. DON'T--
SHE'S HERE.
BEN. HE WAS HERE. HE WAS TRYING TO HELP ME.
HE MIGHT'VE LEFT BEFORE GLORY CAME. I CAN'T REMEMBER.
♪♪ [ Rock ]
♪ I'M AMUSED BY THE OVERWHELMING CHOICES ♪
♪ I GUESS THE HARDEST PART IS KNOWING WHEN TO STOP ♪
♪ YEAH, I'M CONFUSED AND I THINK I'M HEARING VOICES ♪
♪ 'CAUSE YOU'RE HAPPENING SO FAST GONNA SAVE THE BEST FOR LAST ♪
♪♪ [ Continues, Indistinct ] [ Spike ] BLEEDIN' CRIME IS WHAT IT IS.
JACKIN' UP THE BAR PRICE TO PAY FOR FIXIN' UP THIS SINKHOLE.
NOT MY FAULT THE INSURANCE DOESN'T COVER "ACT OF TROLL."
GEE. MAYBE IT'S TIME YOU FOUND A NEW PLACE TO PATRONIZE.
I'VE HALF A MIND TO, ESPECIALLY SINCE THE FLOWERING ONION...
GOT REMODELED RIGHT OFF THE SODDIN' MENU.
THAT'S THE ONLY THING THIS PLACE HAD GOING FOR IT.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHAT DO YOU MEAN, WHAT AM I--
HERE... AT THIS TABLE,
TALKING TO ME LIKE WE'RE SOME KIND OF TALKING BUDDIES?
WELL, I SAW YOU SITTIN' HERE ALONE.
THOUGHT, I DON'T KNOW, YOU COULD MAYBE DO WITH A BIT OF, YOU KNOW, COMPANY.
SUIT YOURSELF.
WELL...
IT'S JUST, WE TOOK ON THAT GLORY CHIPPIE TOGETHER.
I WAS RIGHT THERE WITH YOU, FIGHTIN' THE FIGHT.
ACTUALLY, YOU WERE SLEEPING THE SLEEP OF THE KNOCKED UNCONSCIOUS.
YEAH. STILL, POINTS FOR INTENT. YOU'D THINK THAT WOULD BE ENOUGH...
TO CUT ME A SLIVER OF SLACK, EARN ME A LITTLE CONSIDERATION, RESPECT.
HEY, EVIL DEAD, YOU'RE IN MY SEAT.
BUGGER IT.
XANDER, I THINK YOU MAY HAVE HURT HIS FEELINGS.
AND YOU SHOULD NEVER HURT THE FEELINGS OF A BRUTAL KILLER.
YOU KNOW, THAT'S ACTUALLY SOME PRETTY GOOD ADVICE.
SO, WHO'S UP FOR SOME MORE LIQUID REFRESHMENTS?
- I'M BUYING, FOR I AM PAYDAY MAN. - I COULD USE A WATER.
WATER POSES NO CHALLENGE FOR PAYDAY MAN, FOR I HAVE--
HEY, WHERE'S MY CHANGE?
SPIKE, YOU DIABOLICAL FIEND. ♪♪ [ Ends ]
POOR WIL. STILL GETTING THOSE HEADACHES? [ Applause, Cheers ]
FEWER AND FURTHER BETWEEN, BUT, YEP.
THEY'RE STILL EXERCISING THEIR VISITATION RIGHTS.
HONEY, IN CASE YOU DIDN'T HEAR ME THE FIRST 6,000 TIMES, NO MORE TELEPORTATION SPELLS.
WELL, IT'S JUST WE HAVE SQUAT IN THE WAY OF GLORY-FIGHTING ARSENAL,
AND ANOTHER RUN-IN WITH HER,
AND MY HEADACHES AND NOSEBLEEDS ARE GONNA BE THE LEAST OF OUR PROBLEMS.
YOU KNOW WHAT? THIS IS THE FIRST "R AND R" I'VE HAD IN WEEKS.
HOW ABOUT WE GO ONE NIGHT WITHOUT SAYING THE NAME "GLORY"?
I'M DOWN WITH THAT. LET'S JUST CALL "SHE WHO WILL NOT BE NAMED" ANOTHER NAME.
- LET'S JUST CALL HER-- - BEN.
- [ Tara ] FOR EXAMPLE. - I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
BEN. HEY. BUFFY, HI.
I BARELY RECOGNIZED YOU WITHOUT YOUR HOSPITAL SCRUBS.
OH, YOU'D BE SURPRISED THE EXTENT OF MY WARDROBE. REALLY?
I ACTUALLY HAVE ENTIRE OUTFITS THAT AREN'T BLUE PAJAMAS.
[ Laughs ]
UM, MY SISTER, UH, TOLD ME WHAT HAPPENED AT THE HOSPITAL...
RIGHT BEFORE I GOT THERE. UH-HUH.
AND I JUST WANTED TO SAY THANKS...
FOR LOOKING AFTER HER.
THAT'S OKAY. I'M GLAD DAWN'S ALL RIGHT.
THE POINT IS, I WORK HARD FOR THAT MONEY. AND YOU'RE SAYING I DIDN'T?
YOU STOLE IT. AND YOU'RE MAKING IT INTO VERY HARD WORK.
LISTEN, BLEACH BOY. I DON'T HAVE A CHIP IN MY HEAD.
I CAN DO FAR MORE DAMAGE TO YOU THAN YOU CAN EVER DO TO ME.
- YEAH? - [ Buffy Laughs ]
LIKE YOU COULD EVER HURT ME.
[ Horn Blaring ]
SUNNYDALE STATION. LAST STOP THIS LINE.
OH, GOD! OH, PLEASE!
HELP ME! SOMEBODY, PLEASE!
HELP ME! SOMEBODY! [ Cracking, Snapping ]
[ Screaming ]
BUFFY? [ TV: Indistinct ]
- BACK BY POPULAR DEMAND. - DID YOU HAVE A NICE TIME?
YOU KNOW, I THINK I DID. MUCH-NEEDED FUN,
APART FROM WILLOW'S HEADACHES AND SPIKE'S CAMEO APPEARANCE.
SPIKE WAS THERE?
UNFORTUNATELY. WELL, I'M RELIEVED THAT YOU'RE HOME,
'CAUSE, TO BE HONEST, I WASN'T FEELING ALL THAT SAFE WITH YOU GONE--
AT FIRST--
AND THEN I REMEMBERED THAT RUPERT WAS HERE,
AND I FELT MUCH, MUCH SAFER. YES. THANK YOU FOR THE LITTLE BACKPEDAL,
BUT I'M FORCED TO AGREE THAT I'M BARELY AN ADEQUATE SUBSTITUTE FOR A SLAYER IN THE HOUSE.
GOOD NIGHT. [ Joyce ] GOOD NIGHT.
SO, HOW IS DAWN? SHE'S COPING VERY WELL--
EXTREMELY WELL, CONSIDERING THE EXTRAORDINARY CIRCUMSTANCES OF HER ORIGIN.
THEN LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING.
UM... WE'VE BEEN GOING EASY ON HER THE LAST WEEK,
LETTING THINGS SLIDE. OH, I DON'T THINK THAT'S AT ALL WISE.
YOU DON'T? ABOUT THE BEST THING YOU CAN DO NOW...
IS BEHAVE EXACTLY AS YOU ALWAYS HAVE.
ANY SPECIAL TREATMENT AT THIS STAGE IS LIKELY TO UNDERMINE DAWN'S SENSE OF NORMALITY.
YOU THINK SO? ABSOLUTELY.
THANKS.
- DAWN! - WHAT?
WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT BORROWING MY CLOTHING? I DIDN'T TAKE YOUR CLOTHES.
- BULL! - I NEVER TOUCHED YOUR STUFF.
REALLY? THEN WHAT HAPPENED TO MY BLUE CASHMERE SWEATER?
[ Harmony ] SPIKEY.
AREN'T YOU COMING TO BED?
I'M NOT TIRED.
ME NEITHER.
DON'T YOU WANT TO COME IN AND...
TIRE ME OUT?
HARM, REALLY NOT IN THE MOOD RIGHT NOW.
[ Sighs ] YOU'RE NEVER IN THE MOOD.
[ Kisses ] WE COULD DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT TONIGHT.
LIKE WHAT, YOU STOP YAMMERING FOR TWO SECONDS?
WELL, WE COULD--
I DON'T KNOW--
MAYBE PLAY A GAME?
OH, I'M GONNA STAKE YOU.
I'M COMING AFTER YOU, YOU BAD, EVIL VAMPIRE,
AND I'M GONNA SLAY YOU!
I'M SNEAKING UP, AND I'M GONNA STAKE YOU SO MUCH...
WITH MY SLAYING POWERS THAT I HAVE, BECAUSE I'M THE CHOSEN--
WHOO! OHH! [ Growling ]
[ Thudding ] OH, SPIKE.
[ Willow ] I JUST DON'T SEE WHY HE COULDN'T END UP WITH ESMERELDA.
THEY COULD HAVE HAD THE WEDDING RIGHT THERE, BENEATH THE VERY BELL TOWER...
WHERE HE LABORED THANKLESSLY FOR ALL THOSE YEARS.
NO. SEE, IT CAN'T-- IT CAN'T END LIKE THAT,
'CAUSE ALL OF QUASIMODO'S ACTIONS WERE SELFISHLY MOTIVATED.
HE HAD NO MORAL COMPASS, NO UNDERSTANDING OF RIGHT.
EVERYTHING HE DID HE DID OUT OF LOVE FOR A WOMAN WHO'D NEVER BE ABLE TO LOVE HIM BACK.
ALSO, YOU CAN TELL IT'S NOT GONNA HAVE A HAPPY ENDING WHEN THE MAIN GUY'S ALL BUMPY.
WHAT DID YOU THINK, BUFFY?
THE TEST ISN'T TILL TOMORROW, RIGHT? I DON'T HAVE AN OPINION TILL THEN.
BUT YOU READ IT, RIGHT?
KIND OF NOT. I RENTED THE MOVIE.
OH, WITH, UM-- WITH CHARLES LAUGHTON?
I DON'T KNOW. WAS HE ONE OF THE SINGING GARGOYLES?
OH, BOY. I-- I'M KIDDING.
YOU'RE DONE WITH THIS? YEAH, HI. UH, KIND OF READING THAT?
[ Buffy ] "SIX FOUND MURDERED ON TRAIN AT SUNNYDALE STATION."
GLORY?
"UNCONFIRMED REPORTS OF SEVERE TRAUMA TO THE THROATS OF ONE OR MORE OF THE VICTIMS."
SURVEY SAYS... VAMPIRE.
OH, IT'S YOU. WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE LURKING ABOUT?
I'M NOT LURKING.
I'M LOOKING. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
NOTHING.
SO, IS THAT HOW YOU GET AROUND TOWN IN THE DAYTIME?
I MEAN, DOES THAT LEAD INTO THE SEWERS OR SOMETHING?
CAN YOU SHOW ME? NO.
WHY ARE YOU--
DOES BUFFY KNOW YOU'RE HERE?
HUH! YEAH, RIGHT.
'CAUSE NOTHING WOULD MAKE HER HAPPIER THAN TO FIND OUT I'M HANGING OUT...
AFTER SCHOOL IN A VAMPIRE'S LAIR.
ESPECIALLY YOURS.
GO HOME THEN.
-I DON'T FEEL LIKE IT RIGHT NOW. -WELL, YOU CAN'T BLOODY WELL STAY HERE.
WHY NOT? BECAUSE I'VE GOT THINGS TO DO.
BAD, EVIL THINGS...
THAT ARE NOT FOR A CHILD'S EYES.
I'M NOT A CHILD.
I'M NOT EVEN HUMAN.
NOT ORIGINALLY. [ Sighs ]
YEAH, WELL, ORIGINALLY, I WAS.
I GOT OVER IT.
DOESN'T SEEM TO ME IT MATTERS VERY MUCH HOW YOU START OUT.
THAT'S SMART.
I GET THAT.
I LIKE HOW YOU TALK TO ME LIKE I CAN UNDERSTAND THINGS.
EVERYONE ELSE IS BEING ALL TWITCHY AND SECRETIVE.
THEY'RE JUST TRYING TO KEEP YOU SAFE, I EXPECT.
- I FEEL SAFE WITH YOU. - [ Coughing ]
- TAKE THAT BACK! - I MEAN, YOU HAVE THE WHOLE SUPER POWER THING,
AND YOU'RE JUST AS TOUGH AS BUFFY IS.
MAYBE TOUGHER. BUFFY THINKS SO TOO.
SHE DOES?
WELL, SHE'S ALWAYS WORRIED ABOUT WHAT SHE'S GONNA DO...
- IF YOU EVER GET THAT CHIP OUT OF YOUR HEAD. - IS THAT RIGHT?
SO, UM...
WHAT ELSE DOES BUFFY SAY ABOUT ME?
HEY! [ Joyce ] DAWN?
NO. IT'S ME.
IS DAWN WITH YOU? ISN'T SHE HERE?
NO, SHE DIDN'T COME HOME FROM SCHOOL TODAY.
OH, BUFFY, THE NEWS SAID SOMETHING ABOUT PEOPLE MURDERED--
IT'S NOT GLORY. IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH DAWN. I PROMISE.
LOOK, SHE PROBABLY--
I'LL FIND HER.
[ Dawn ] AND THE LADY JUST INVITED YOU IN?
WELL, I HAD HUBBY BY THE THROAT, DIDN'T I?
PROMISED HER HE'D LIVE IF SHE DID THE INVITE.
AND DID YOU... LET HIM LIVE?
WHAT DO YOU THINK? TOO MUCH FOR YOU?
NO. KEEP GOING.
AND I KILL 'EM.
RIGHT QUICK. THE WHOLE LOT.
BUT... THERE'S SOMEONE MISSING.
THERE'S SUPPOSED TO BE...
THIS LITTLE GIRL...
SO, I GET REAL QUIET...
AND I HEAR THIS TINY NOISE COMING FROM THE COAL BIN.
THIS LITTLE SIGH.
SO, I LISTENED HARDER. IT'S VERY, VERY QUIET.
[ Door Opens ] [ Both Gasp ]
- OH, BLOODY HELL. - SPIKE, I NEED YOUR HELP. DAWN IS...
HERE.
SPIKE WAS JUST TELLING A STORY, AND HE WAS JUST AT THIS REALLY COOL PART--
WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? WHAT IS SHE DOING HERE?
- JUST HANGING OUT. - HERE?
CAN YOU PLEASE LET HIM FINISH THE STORY, THEN YOU COULD DO THE LECTURE?
YEAH. OKAY.
LET'S HEAR THE STORY THAT SPIKE IS TELLING MY LITTLE SISTER.
RIGHT. YEAH.
SO, UH, I KNEW THE GIRL WAS IN THE COAL BIN.
AND I RIP IT OPEN, VERY VIOLENT, HAUL HER OUT OF THERE.
AND THEN I GIVE HER TO A GOOD FAMILY...
IN A NICE HOME WHERE THEY'RE NEVER, EVER MEAN TO HER...
AND DIDN'T LOCK HER IN A COAL BIN.
WHAT? THAT'S SO LAME.
I WAS JUST ABOUT TO SEND HER HOME. I KNEW YOU'D BE FRETTING.
DAWN, GET YOUR STUFF. WE'RE GETTING OUT OF HERE.
WHY DOESN'T THAT REGISTER WITH YOU? CRYPT PLUS VAMPIRE EQUALS BAD.
'CAUSE IT WAS SPIKE.
HANGING OUT WITH SPIKE IS NOT COOL, DAWN, OKAY?
IT IS-- IT IS DANGEROUS AND ICKY.
I DON'T THINK SPIKE'S ICKY. YEAH, WELL, THINK AGAIN, SISTER.
YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON HIM. NO, I DON'T.
IT'S JUST... [ Laughs ] HE'S GOT COOL HAIR...
AND HE WEARS COOL LEATHER COATS AND STUFF.
AND HE DOESN'T TREAT ME LIKE AN ALIEN.
HE'S A KILLER, DAWN. YOU CANNOT HAVE A CRUSH ON SOMETHING...
THAT IS DEAD AND EVIL AND A VAMPIRE.
RIGHT. THAT'S WHY YOU WERE NEVER WITH ANGEL FOR THREE YEARS.
ANGEL'S DIFFERENT. HE HAS A SOUL.
SPIKE HAS A CHIP. SAME DIFF.
I CAN'T LISTEN TO THIS!
[ Sighs ] SPIKE IS A MONSTER, OKAY?
AND PLUS, YOU ARE ONLY 14 YEARS OLD.
I LIKE HANGING OUT WITH HIM IS ALL.
AND EVEN IF I DID HAVE A CRUSH, HE WOULDN'T NOTICE IN A MILLION YEARS.
- NOT WITH YOU AROUND. - WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
SPIKE'S TOTALLY INTO YOU.
OH, COME ON. YOU DIDN'T NOTICE?
BUFFY, SPIKE'S COMPLETELY IN LOVE WITH YOU.
HUH?
SO, TELL ME AGAIN WHAT WE'RE LOOKING FOR.
CLUES. OKAY.
COULD YOU GIVE ME A CLUE ABOUT WHAT KIND OF CLUES?
[ Sighs ] SOMETHING. ANYTHING.
JUST WANT TO KNOW THIS WAS A VAMP ATTACK.
IF IT WAS, HOW MANY WE'RE TALKING ABOUT.
WELL, SUNNYDALE'S FINEST DIDN'T LEAVE US A LOT OF STUFF TO EXAMINE AND...
- WHO KNOWS HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE TRAIPSED THROUGH HERE. - XANDER?
- WHAT? - NEVER MIND.
[ Sighs ] IT'S JUST THAT...
DAWN SAID THAT--
- YEAH? - FORGET IT.
BUFFY.
SHE THINKS THAT--
SHE SAID THAT--
SPIKE'S IN LOVE WITH ME.
- [ Laughs ] - I'M NOT JOKING.
OH, I HOPE NOT. IT'S FUNNIER IF IT'S TRUE.
I'M SERIOUS. XANDER, THIS IS SERIOUS.
YOU'RE RIGHT. [ Clears Throat ]
[ Laughs ] IT'S CREEPY.
NO, NOT CREEPY.
'CAUSE IT'S NOT REAL.
I MEAN, HOW UPSET CAN YOU REALLY GET OVER ONE OF SPIKE'S FEVERED DAYDREAMS...
THAT'S NOT GONNA HAPPEN? I GUESS.
SO, WHERE DID DAWN--
HOW DID SHE COME TO THIS EXTREMELY ENTERTAINING CONCLUSION?
SHE WAS HANGING OUT WITH SPIKE.
I THINK SHE HAS A CRUSH ON HIM. WHAT?
I MEAN, I ALWAYS KNEW THAT HE HAD THIS WEIRD FIXATION WITH ME--
-I'M THE ONE SHE HAS A CRUSH ON. ME! -THERE'S NOTHING HERE. LET'S GO.
IT'S ALWAYS BEEN ME. BIG, FUNNY XANDER.
OH, WHAT? SHE JUST SUDDENLY DECIDES I'M NOT THE COOL ONE ANYMORE?
WHY IS THAT OKAY?
BUT WHAT THEY DIDN'T GET WAS THAT IT WAS A COPY OF THE BILL OF LADING.
SO THEY THOUGHT THAT IT WAS ANOTHER ORDER FORM.
SO NOW I'VE GOT TWO SHIPMENTS OF GREEK AMPHORAE ON MY HANDS. [ Laughing ]
[ Spike ] THAT'S FUNNY. AND REALLY, HOW MANY DO YOU NEED? AMPHORAE.
[ Laughing ] OH, BUFFY.
SPIKE CAME BY TO APOLOGIZE FOR YESTERDAY. OUR MISSING-CHILD DRAMA.
AND HE JUST DECIDED TO HANG OUT FOR A WHILE?
WELL, I GOT TALKING ABOUT THE GALLERY. SEE, THERE WAS THIS--
OH, DON'T GET US ALL LAUGHING AGAIN, JOYCE.
- ANYHOW, I REALLY NEED TO TALK TO YOUR ELDEST. - WHAT ABOUT?
I GOT A BIT OF INFO YOU MIGHT BE KEEN ON KNOWING.
SORRY. ALL OUT OF CASH. WHY DON'T YOU HIT ON GILES-- HIT UP GILES.
I GOT A BEAD ON THE GUY WHO KILLED THOSE PEOPLE.
THE ONES ON THE TRAIN. DO TELL.
I'LL DO BETTER THAN THAT. I'LL SHOW.
WHAT'S THE MATTER? NOTHING.
JUST-- [ Sighs ]
TWO VAMPS HOLED UP IN A WAREHOUSE DOWNTOWN.
COME ON. WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? GRAB YOUR COAT AND YOUR POINTY STICKS.
HEY!
EWW. IT'S NOT BLOOD. IT'S BOURBON.
EWW.
SUIT YOURSELF.
[ Glove Box Opens, Closes ]
[ Sighs ]
♪♪ [ Humming ]
♪ I WANNA BE SEDATED ♪♪
DO YOU LIKE THE RAMONES?
SO, IF YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS FOR THE MONEY, WHY ARE YOU-- SHH!
[ Distant Chattering ]
[ Corn Popping ]
THE SLAYER.
WELL, THAT WAS SAD.
I'M EMBARRASSED FOR OUR KIND.
SO, SHOULD WE CHASE AFTER 'EM THEN?
THEY COULDN'T HAVE GONE FAR.
THESE VAMPS HAVE BEEN HERE FOR A WHILE. THEY'VE NESTED.
SO, YOU'RE SAYING THEY'RE A COUPLE OF POOFTERS?
NO. I'M SAYING THEY HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH LAST NIGHT'S MURDERS.
HOW DO YOU FIGURE? WHOEVER DID IT ONLY ARRIVED IN TOWN LAST NIGHT.
LOOKS LIKE YOU'VE WASTED MY TIME.
[ Sighs ] UHH!
WHAT ARE YOU DOING? I-- UH, IT WAS-- [ Scoffs ]
I WASN'T THINKING. WHAT IS THIS?
OH, C-- DON'T GET YOUR KNICKERS TWISTED! I WAS--
WHAT IS THIS?
THE LATE-NIGHT STAKEOUT, THE BOGUS SUSPECTS, THE FLASK.
IS THIS A DATE? A--
PLEASE! [ Chuckles ] A DATE!
YOU ARE COMPLETELY OFF YOUR BIRD.
I MEAN-- DO YOU WANT IT TO BE?
UHH. OH, MY GOD.
OH. OH, NO.
ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND? IT'S NOT SO UNUSUAL.
TWO PEOPLE... IN THE WORKPLACE. FEELINGS DEVELOP.
NO! NO, NO, FEELINGS DO NOT DEVELOP. NO FEELINGS.
YOU CAN'T DENY IT. THERE'S SOMETHING BETWEEN US.
- LOATHING. DISGUST. - HEAT. DESIRE.
- PLEASE. SPIKE, YOU'RE A VAMPIRE! - ANGEL WAS A VAMPIRE.
ANGEL WAS GOOD. AND I CAN BE TOO. I'VE CHANGED, BUFFY.
WHAT, THAT CHIP IN YOUR HEAD? THAT'S NOT CHANGE.
THAT'S JUST HOLDING YOU BACK. YOU'RE LIKE A SERIAL KILLER IN PRISON!
WOMEN MARRY 'EM ALL THE TIME! UHH!
UH, BUT I'M NOT LIKE THAT.
SOMETHING'S HAPPENING TO ME. I CAN'T STOP THINKING ABOUT YOU.
UHH. AND IF THAT MEANS TURNING MY BACK ON THE WHOLE EVIL THING--
YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN. YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT FEELINGS ARE.
I DAMN WELL DO! I LIE AWAKE EVERY NIGHT.
YOU SLEEP DURING THE DAY! YEAH, BUT--
YOU ARE MISSING THE POINT. THIS IS REAL HERE.
I LOVE-- DON'T!
[ Sighs ] DON'T SAY IT.
I'M GOING. OH, COME ON. WE NEED TO TALK.
WE DON'T NEED TO DO ANYTHING, OKAY?
THERE IS NO WE. UNDERSTAND?
BUFFY.
[ Scraping Noise ]
WHO'S THERE?
[ Drusilla ] A HAPPY MEMORY, PRETTY SPIKE.
LOOK WHO'S COME TO MAKE EVERYTHING RIGHT AGAIN.
SO, UH, LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT.
DARLA GOT MOJO-ED BACK FROM THE BEYOND. YOU VAMPED HER.
AND NOW SHE AND YOU ARE WORKING ON TURNING ANGEL...
INTO HIS OWN BAD SELF AGAIN. MM-HMM.
SOUNDS FUN. IT IS.
LIKE LOLLIPOPS AT THE CIRCUS.
ALTHOUGH... DIDN'T CARE FOR ANGELUS SETTING US ON FIRE.
AND THIS HAS GOT YOU, WHAT, ALL NOSTALGIC NOW, HAS IT?
I WANT US TO BE A FAMILY AGAIN, MY WILLIAM.
[ Breathy Sigh ]
[ Whispers ] COME BACK WITH ME.
TO LOS ANGELES?
I'VE DONE THE WHOLE L.A. SCENE, DRU.
DIDN'T AGREE WITH ME.
BESIDES-- HMM? I'VE GOT A SWEET LITTLE SETUP HERE IN SUNNY-D.
DECENT DIGS... NOT TO MENTION ALL THE TASTY TOWNIES I CAN EAT.
NAUGHTY. SHH.
YOU NEEDN'T MAKE UP STORIES.
I ALREADY KNOW WHY YOU'RE NOT COMING.
POOR BOY.
TIN SOLDIERS PUT FUNNY LITTLE KNICKKNACKS IN YOUR BRAIN.
CAN'T HUNT. CAN'T HURT. CAN'T KILL.
YOU'VE GOT A CHIP.
RIGHT. SO YOU'VE HEARD.
POOR SPIKE'S BECOME A CAUTIONARY TALE FOR VAMPIRES, RIGHT?
"YOU BETTER BE GOOD, KIDDIES, OR ELSE THEY MIGHT WIRE YOU UP SOMEDAY."
I DON'T BELIEVE IN SCIENCE.
ALL THOSE BITS AND MOLECULES NO ONE'S EVER SEEN.
I TRUST EYES AND HEART ALONE.
AND DO YOU KNOW WHAT MINE IS SINGING OUT RIGHT NOW?
[ Whispers ] YOU'RE A KILLER.
BORN TO SLASH AND BASH AND-- [ Gasps ]
OH! BLEED LIKE BEAUTIFUL POETRY.
[ Panting ]
NO LITTLE TINKERTOY COULD EVER STOP YOU FROM FLOWING.
YEAH. OHH.
BUT THE PAIN-- LOVE, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.
IT'S-- IT'S SEARING. IT'S BLINDING.
ALL IN YOUR HEAD.
I CAN SEE IT. LITTLE BIT OF PLASTIC...
SPIDERWEBBING OUT NASTY BLUE SHOCKS,
AND EVERY ONE IS A LIE.
ELECTRICITY LIES, SPIKE.
IT TELLS YOU YOU'RE NOT A BAD DOG, BUT YOU ARE.
[ Growls ]
[ Harmony ] WHAT THE HECK IS THIS?
OH, BLOODY HELL.
WHO IS-- OH, WAIT. I GET IT.
OUR LITTLE SEX GAME WAS JUST THE BEGINNING.
NOW YOU'VE GONE AND PICKED UP SOME CHEAP QUEEN OF THE DAMNED...
TO DRESS UP LIKE YOUR PRECIOUS "DRUIDZILLA."
HARM-- YOU BETTER NOT BE THINKING WHAT I THINK YOU'RE THINKING,
'CAUSE MY ANSWER IS THE SAME AS ALWAYS.
NO THREESOMES UNLESS IT'S BOY, BOY, GIRL. OR CHARLIZE THERON.
HARM, YOU MORON, THIS IS DRUSILLA.
OH. [ Scoffs ] WELL.
YOU'VE GOT SOME NERVE SHOWING UP HERE LIKE THIS AFTER ALL THIS TIME.
- AFTER BREAKING MY SWEET BOO-BOO'S HEART! - [ Mouths Word ]
DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW HARD IT'S BEEN...
TO BREAK DOWN THE WALLS HE PUT UP AFTER YOU LEFT?
I MEAN, SERIOUS TRUST ISSUES. HARM--
SO IT'S NO USE, YOU CRAWLING BACK TO HIM,
'CAUSE SPIKEY DON'T PLAY THAT GAME ANYMORE, MORTICIA.
IT'S BEEN FUN WHILE IT LASTED, HARM,
BUT I THINK IT'D BE BEST NOW IF YOU HIT THE ROAD.
UH!
[ Gasping ]
WHY? BECAUSE SHE'S BACK?
NO.
BECAUSE I AM.
HUH! AND THERE YOU ARE,
MY DARLING, DEADLY BOY.
[ Panting ]
WELL, HE-- HE ACTUALLY TOLD YOU?
HE SAID, "I LOVE YOU"?
WELL, I DIDN'T LET HIM GET THAT FAR, BUT I COULD SEE THE WORDS COMING.
HONEY, DID YOU SOMEHOW, UNINTENTIONALLY, LEAD HIM ON IN ANY WAY?
- SEND HIM SIGNALS? - WELL...
I DO BEAT HIM UP A LOT.
- FOR SPIKE, THAT'S LIKE THIRD BASE. - OHH!
BUFFY, UM, I'M REALLY WORRIED.
- SO AM I. HE COULD BECOME DANGEROUS. - NOT REALLY.
I MEAN, AS LONG AS IT'S STILL "CHIPS AHOY" IN SPIKE'S HEAD,
HE CAN'T HURT ME OR ANY OF US.
YOU KNOW, BESIDES, THIS'LL PROBABLY JUST BLOW OVER. YOU KNOW?
IT'S JUST SOME WEIRD SPIKE THING.
HE'LL HAVE THE HOTS FOR SOME GAK DEMON BEFORE WE KNOW IT.
I DON'T KNOW. THESE THINGS CAN-- CAN BECOME PRETTY TWISTED.
YEAH, AND SPIKE. I MEAN, HE'S--
PRETTY TWISTED. YEAH.
WELL, YOU MADE IT CLEAR, RIGHT? THAT IT COULD NEVER HAPPEN.
THAT THERE'S NO POSSIBLE WAY EVER.
YEAH. I-- I THINK SO.
I DON'T KNOW. I WAS JUST SO THROWN.
WELL, BUFFY, YOU HAVE TO TALK TO HIM AGAIN.
WHAT? NO! NO, NO, NO.
- I HAVE TO AVOID HIM AGAIN. - NOT UNTIL YOU SHUT HIM DOWN COMPLETELY.
IF HE THINKS THERE'S EVEN A LITTLE CHANCE WITH YOU, THERE'S NO TELLING WHAT HE'LL DO.
♪ AND THIS TIME ♪
♪ I'M STAYING ♪
♪ TO BURY ♪
♪ THE TRAIL THAT YOU LEFT ♪
♪ YOU LEFT ♪
♪ AND IF I WAS COLD ♪
♪ WELL THEN YOU WOULD STAY ♪
♪ INSIDE ME ♪
♪ WARM ME ♪
♪ HERE I'M SAFE ♪♪
I KNOW THIS IS HARD, HONEY, BUT I THINK YOU MADE THE RIGHT DECISION.
BETTER TO NIP THIS IN THE BUD BEFORE-- THE BUD NIPS ME.
EXACTLY.
IF YOU WANT, BUFFY, I CAN GO WITH. BACK YOU UP WITH SOME SCOWLIN'.
THANKS, BUT I THINK THIS IS SOMETHING...
I HAVE TO DO MYSELF.
BESIDES, YOU KNOW, MAYBE I'M WRONG.
MAYBE THIS WHOLE THING'S JUST BEEN BLOWN WAY OUT OF PROPORTION,
AND HE'S ALREADY GONE BACK TO WANTING ME DEAD. HERE'S HOPIN'.
[ Sighs ]
YOU KNOW WHAT THOUGH? THERE IS ONE THING YOU CAN DO FOR ME WHILE I'M GONE.
♪ I TOLD YOU ♪
♪ JUST LIKE I TOLD EVERYONE ♪
♪ I STILL HAVE SOME DOUBTS ♪
♪ THAT YOU ARE THE REASON ♪
- ♪ STILL THIS IS JUST SO HARD ♪ - [ Neck Snaps ]
- ♪ 'CAUSE I KNOW THAT I'LL BE LEFT LIKE ALWAYS ♪ - [ Neck Snaps ]
- [ Snarls ] - ♪ ALWAYS ♪
♪ HERE I'M SAFE ♪
♪ SO HERE I STAY ♪
♪ LIFT ME OUT ♪
♪ LIFT THE DOUBT ♪♪
[ Snarls ]
SPIKE?
ARE YOU HERE?
SPIKE?
[ Sighs ]
SEE ANYTHING INTERESTING?
SPIKE. I--
WHAT-- EH--
WHAT HAPPENED? [ Drusilla ] ME.
[ Prod Sizzles ] AAH!
YOU REMEMBER MY EX, DON'T YOU, SLAYER?
[ Groans ]
COME BACK, SHE DID.
COULDN'T LIVE WITHOUT ME.
MY BOY'S BEEN FEEDING AGAIN. I KNOW WHAT HE REALLY WANTS TO EAT.
UH!
SHALL WE TIE HER UP?
PLAY WITH HER A TEENSY BIT FIRST.
I'M THROUGH PLAYING. OOH!
I LIKE IT WHEN YOU'RE ALL DOUR AND STRAIGHT-TO-BUSINESS-LIKE.
AAH!
BLOODY WELL THROUGH PLAYING.
[ Moans Softly ] [ Spike ] THERE SHE IS.
I WAS BEGINNING TO THINK YOU'D SLEEP THE NIGHT AWAY.
DRU? DRUSILLA?
NOT NICE TO CHANGE THE GAME IN MID-PLAY, SPIKE.
YOU'VE TAKEN MY CHAIR, AND THE MUSIC HASN'T STOPPED.
SORRY, PET. MY HOUSE, MY RULES.
I THINK I SHALL BE VERY CROSS WITH YOU WHEN I'M FREE AGAIN.
WHAT'S GOING ON? SIMPLE. I'M GONNA PROVE SOMETHING.
I LOVE YOU. OH, MY GOD.
HEY, NO. LOOK AT ME. [ Grunts ]
I... LOVE YOU. UH!
YOU'RE ALL I BLOODY THINK ABOUT...
DREAM ABOUT.
YOU'RE IN MY GUT...
IN MY THROAT.
I'M DROWNING IN YOU, SUMMERS. I'M DROWNING IN YOU.
[ Laughing ]
I CAN DO WITHOUT THE LAUGH TRACK, DRU.
BUT IT'S SO FUNNY.
I KNEW... BEFORE YOU DID.
I KNEW YOU LOVED THE SLAYER.
THE PIXIES IN MY HEAD WHISPERED IT TO ME.
YOU CAN'T TELL ME THAT THERE ISN'T ANYTHING THERE BETWEEN YOU AND ME.
I KNOW YOU FEEL SOMETHING. IT'S CALLED REVULSION.
AND WHATEVER YOU THINK YOU'RE FEELING, IT'S NOT LOVE.
YOU CAN'T LOVE WITHOUT A SOUL.
OH, WE CAN, YOU KNOW.
WE CAN LOVE QUITE WELL... IF NOT WISELY.
YOU STILL DON'T BELIEVE. YOU STILL DON'T THINK I MEAN IT.
YOU WANT PROOF, HUH? HOW'S THIS?
I'M GONNA KILL DRUSILLA FOR YOU. [ Laughs ]
THAT DOESN'T PROVE ANYTHING, EXCEPT THAT YOU'RE A SICK, MISERABLE VAMPIRE...
THAT I SHOULD'VE DUSTED A LONG TIME AGO.
- AND, HEY! ALREADY THERE. - DON'T MOCK THIS.
- GO MOCK YOURSELF. - THIS IS DRUSILLA, GIRL!
DO YOU HAVE THE SLIGHTEST IDEA WHAT SHE MEANS TO ME?
IT'S THE FACE OF MY SALVATION.
SHE DELIVERED ME FROM MEDIOCRITY.
FOR OVER A CENTURY, WE CUT A SWATH THROUGH CONTINENTS.
A HUNDRED YEARS, SHE NEVER STOPPED SURPRISING ME.
NEVER STOPPED TAKING ME TO NEW DEPTHS.
I WAS A LUCKY BLOKE...
JUST TO TOUCH SUCH A BLACK BEAUTY.
OHH.
OW! SO YOU SEE, IT MEANS SOMETHING.
NOT TO ME. KILL HER. WHY DO I CARE?
HERE'S WHY.
IF YOU DON'T ADMIT THAT THERE'S SOMETHING THERE,
SOME TINY FEELING FOR ME,
THEN I'LL UNTIE DRU AND LET HER KILL YOU INSTEAD.
YES, PLEASE. I LIKE THAT GAME MUCH MORE.
JUST...
GIVE ME SOMETHING.
A CRUMB... THE BAREST SMIDGEN.
TELL ME MAYBE, SOMEDAY,
THERE'S A CHANCE.
SPIKE...
THE ONLY CHANCE YOU HAD WITH ME WAS WHEN I WAS UNCONSCIOUS.
OH, WHA--
[ Furious Groaning ]
[ Screaming ]
WHAT THE BLEEDING HELL IS WRONG...
WITH YOU BLOODY WOMEN?
WHAT THE HELL DOES IT TAKE?
WHY DO YOU BITCHES TORTURE ME?
WHICH QUESTION DO YOU WANT ME TO ANSWER FIRST?
NO, I-I'M AT THE END OF MY BLEEDING TETHER, YOU KNOW?
I DON'T KNOW WHY I EVEN BOTHER, YOU KNOW. IT'S YOUR FAULT.
- YOU'RE THE ONE TO BLAME FOR ALL THIS, YOU KNOW. - AM I?
BLOODY RIGHT YOU ARE! IF YOU HADN'T LEFT ME FOR THAT CHAOS DEMON,
I NEVER WOULD'VE COME BACK HERE.
NEVER WOULD'VE HAD THIS SODDING CHIP IN MY SKULL.
AND YOU WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO TOUCH ME...
BECAUSE THIS... WITH YOU... IS WRONG.
I KNOW IT. I'M NOT A COMPLETE IDIOT.
YOU THINK I LIKE HAVING YOU IN HERE?
DESTROYING EVERYTHING THAT WAS ME UNTIL ALL THAT'S LEFT IS YOU IN A DEAD SHELL.
[ Scoffs ] YOU SAY YOU HATE IT, BUT YOU WON'T LEAVE.
YOU KNOW, WHAT I SHOULD JUST DO IS GET RID OF BOTH OF YOU.
BURN YOU! CUT YOU INTO LITTLE PIECES...
SO THERE WON'T BE ANY MORE BINTS TO COCK UP THINGS FOR SPI--
[ Whooshing Sound ]
UH! OH, GREAT.
WHAT ABOUT ME, SPIKE? YOU FORGET ABOUT ME AGAIN?
THE ACTUAL GIRLFRIEND?
I GAVE YOU THE BEST... BUNCH OF MONTHS OF MY LIFE!
- UH! - THAT'S RIGHT, LITTLE GIRL.
- TEACH OUR NAUGHTY BOY A LESSON. - OH, NOW YOU'RE ALL GANGING UP.
[ Harmony ] I THOUGHT I COULD CHANGE YOU, SPIKE.
I THOUGHT MAYBE IF I GAVE AND I GAVE AND GAVE,
MAYBE YOU'D COME AROUND.
MAYBE BE A LITTLE NICER.
STOP TREATING ME LIKE YOUR DOG.
BUT NOW I SEE IT'S YOU.
YOU'RE THE DOG... WHO NEEDS TO BE PUT--
[ Grunting, Groaning ]
OW! YOU'RE ON MY HAIR! AAH!
[ Grunting ]
[ Groaning, Coughing ]
POOR SPIKE.
SO LOST. EVEN I CAN'T HELP YOU NOW.
OH, SPIKEY!
AND YOU CAN SAY GOOD-BYE TO THIS,
BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT GONNA SEE IT ANYMORE.
UNLESS YOU RUN INTO ME SOMEWHERE AND IT'S ME WALKING AWAY FROM YOU.
BUT EVEN THEN, I'LL PROBABLY JUST--
YOU KNOW-- BACK AWAY.
YOW!
BUFFY! COME ON, NOW. STOP! YOU CAN'T JUST WALK AWAY FROM THIS.
WHAT PART OF PUNCHING YOU IN THE FACE DID YOU NOT UNDERSTAND? SO WE HAD A FIGHT.
IT'S NOT OUR FIRST, LOVE. IT DOESN'T CHANGE ANYTHING.
IT CHANGES EVERYTHING, SPIKE! I WANT YOU OUT!
I WANT YOU OUT OF THIS TOWN. I WANT YOU OFF THIS PLANET!
YOU DON'T COME NEAR ME, MY FRIENDS, OR MY FAMILY AGAIN, EVER!
UNDERSTAND? NO. IT'S NOT THAT EASY.
WE HAVE SOMETHING, BUFFY. IT'S NOT PRETTY, BUT IT'S REAL.
AND THERE'S NOTHING EITHER ONE OF US CAN DO ABOUT IT.
LIKE IT OR NOT, I'M IN YOUR LIFE. YOU CAN'T JUST SHUT ME OUT.
GRR! ARRGH!