IN EVERY GENERATION THERE IS A CHOSEN ONE.
SHE ALONE WILL STAND AGAINST THE VAMPIRES,
THE DEMONS, AND THE FORCES OF DARKNESS.
SHE IS THE SLAYER.
HI.
OH, THAT'S WHAT I WAS GONNA SAY.
WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?
THIS CHEERLEADING TROPHY.
IT'S LIKE ITS EYES FOLLOW YOU WHEREVER YOU GO.
I LIKE IT.
SO DID YOU LIKE THE MOVIE LAST NIGHT?
I DON'T KNOW.
TODAY'S MOVIES ARE KIND OF LIKE POPCORN.
YOU KNOW, YOU FORGET ABOUT THEM AS SOON AS THEY'RE DONE.
I DO REMEMBER I LIKED THE POPCORN, THOUGH.
YEAH, IT WAS GOOD.
AND I HAD A REALLY FUN TIME WITH THE REST,
I MEAN, THE PART WITH YOU.
OH, THAT'S GREAT. MY TIME WAS ALSO OF THE GOOD.
MINE, TOO.
WELL, THEN...
OH, THERE.
I HAVE MY FRIEND.
SO I WILL GO TO HER.
I'LL SEE YOU THEN,
UH, LATER.
MAN, OZ,
I WOULD LOVE TO GET ME SOME OF THAT BUFFY/WILLOW ACTION,
IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. HA HA HA HA.
THAT'S GREAT, LARRY. YOU'VE REALLY MASTERED THE SINGLE ENTENDRE.
OOPS!
OHH!
OH, THANK YOU, THIGHMASTER!
SO, OZ, MAN, WHAT'S UP WITH THAT?
DATING A JUNIOR? UH, LET ME GUESS.
THAT LITTLE INNOCENT SCHOOLGIRL THING
IS JUST, UH, JUST AN ACT, RIGHT?
YEAH. YEAH, SHE'S ACTUALLY AN EVIL MASTERMIND.
IT'S FUN.
I MEAN, SHE'S GOTTA BE PUTTING OUT, OR WHAT'S THE POINT?
WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO, TALK?
HA HA HA HA HA!
COME ON, FESS UP.
HOW FAR HAVE YOU GOTTEN?
NOWHERE. I MEAN, HE SAID HE WAS GONNA WAIT
UNTIL I WAS READY, BUT I'M READY.
HONEST. I'M GOOD TO GO HERE.
WELL, I THINK IT'S NICE THAT HE'S NOT JUST BEING AN ANIMAL.
IT IS NICE. HE'S GREAT.
WE HAVE A LOT OF FUN,
BUT I WANT SMOOCHIES.
HAVE YOU DROPPED ANY HINTS?
I'VE DROPPED ANVILS.
AH, HE'LL COME AROUND.
WHAT GUY COULD RESIST YOUR WILY, WILLOW CHARMS?
AT LAST COUNT, ALL OF THEM, MAYBE MORE.
WELL, NONE OF THEM KNOW A THING.
THEY ALL GET AN "F" IN WILLOW.
BUT I WANT OZ TO GET AN "A,"
AND, OH, ONE OF THOSE GOLD STARS.
HE WILL.
WELL, HE BETTER HURRY.
I DON'T WANT TO BE THE ONLY GIRL IN SCHOOL
WITHOUT A REAL BOYFRIEND.
OH, I'M SUCH AN IDIOT.
I'M SORRY.
I SHOULDN'T EVEN BE TALKING ABOUT--
DO YOU WANT ME TO GO AWAY?
I WISH YOU WOULDN'T.
HOW ARE YOU HOLDING UP ANYWAY?
I'M HOLDING. I WAS GOING ON 2 MINUTES THERE
WITHOUT THINKING ABOUT ANGEL.
WELL, THERE YOU GO.
BUT I'D DO A LOT BETTER IF YOU AND XANDER AND I
COULD DO THAT "SHARING OUR MISERY" THING TONIGHT.
GREAT. I'LL GIVE XANDER A CALL.
WHAT'S HIS NUMBER?
OH, YEAH, 1-800- I'M-DATING-A-SKANKY-HO.
MEOW!
REALLY? THANKS.
I'VE NEVER GOTTEN A "MEOW" BEFORE.
WELL-DESERVED.
DARN TOOTIN'. I'M JUST SAYING XANDER AND CORDELIA?
WHAT DOES HE SEE IN HER ANYWAY?
BUT WHAT COULD SHE POSSIBLY SEE IN HIM?
EXCUSE ME? WE DIDN'T COME HERE TO TALK ABOUT WILLOW.
WE CAME HERE TO DO THINGS I CAN NEVER TELL MY FATHER ABOUT
BECAUSE HE STILL THINKS I'M A GOOD GIRL.
I JUST DON'T TRUST OZ WITH HER.
I MEAN, HE'S A SENIOR, HE'S ATTRACTIVE--
OK, MAYBE NOT TO ME, BUT--AND HE'S IN A BAND.
AND WE KNOW WHAT KIND OF ELEMENT THAT ATTRACTS.
I'VE DATED LOTS OF GUYS IN BANDS.
THANK YOU.
DO YOU EVEN WANT TO BE HERE?
I'M NOT RUNNING AWAY.
BECAUSE WHEN YOU'RE NOT BABBLING ABOUT POOR, DEFENSELESS WILLOW,
YOU ARE RAVING ABOUT THE ALL-POWERFUL BUFFY.
I DO NOT BABBLE.
I OCCASIONALLY RUN-ON, EVER NOW AND THEN I YAMMER--
XANDER? YEAH?
LOOK AROUND.
WE'RE IN MY DADDY'S CAR, IT'S JUST THE 2 OF US,
THERE IS A BEAUTIFUL, BIG FULL MOON OUTSIDE TONIGHT.
IT DOESN'T GET MORE ROMANTIC THAN THIS.
SO SHUT UP!
[GROWLING]
[RUSTLING]
DID YOU HEAR THAT?
WHAT IS IT NOW?
I THOUGHT I HEARD SOMETHING.
IS--IS WILLOW SENDING OUT SOME SORT OF DISTRESS SIGNAL
THAT ONLY YOU CAN HEAR?
HUH.
[RUSTLING] OK, NOW I KNOW I HEARD SOMETHING.
ALL RIGHT, THAT'S IT. YOU KNOW, YOUR MIND HASN'T BEEN HERE ALL NIGHT.
HOW ABOUT I JUST DROP YOU OFF--AAH!
GET US OUT OF HERE!
AAH! AAH!
WHERE ARE THE KEYS?
WE SHOULD BE MOVING! LET'S GO!
OH, I GOT 'EM!
AAH!
Xander: TOLD YOU I HEARD SOMETHING.
AND YOU'RE SURE IT WAS A WEREWOLF?
WELL, LET'S SEE, UM, 6 FEET TALL, CLAWS,
A BIG OLD SNOUT IN THE MIDDLE OF HIS FACE LIKE A WOLF.
UM, YEAH, I'M STICKING WITH MY FIRST GUESS.
SEEMS WISE.
OH, OH, AND THEN THERE WAS THAT LITTLE THING
WHERE IT TRIED TO BITE US.
IT WAS SO AWFUL. I KNOW.
DADDY JUST HAD THIS CAR DETAILED.
SO WHAT'S THE WORD?
WELL, IT SEEMS THERE WERE A NUMBER OF OTHER ATTACKS
BY A "WILD DOG" AROUND TOWN.
SEVERAL ANIMAL CARCASSES WERE FOUND MUTILATED.
YOU MEAN, LIKE BUNNIES AND STUFF?
NO, DON'T TELL ME.
OH, DON'T WORRY. I MEAN, THEY MIGHT NOT LOOK IT,
BUT BUNNIES CAN REALLY TAKE CARE OF THEMSELVES.
YEAH.
YES, UH, FORTUNATELY, NO PEOPLE WERE INJURED.
WELL, THAT FALLS INTO THE "THAT'S A SWITCH" COLUMN.
WELL, FOR NOW. BUT MY GUESS IS
THAT THIS WEREWOLF WILL BE BACK AT NEXT MONTH'S FULL MOON.
WHAT ABOUT TONIGHT'S FULL MOON?
PARDON?
WELL, LAST NIGHT WAS THE NIGHT BEFORE THE FULL MOON,
TRADITIONALLY KNOWN AS...
THE NIGHT BEFORE THE FULL MOON.
MEANING THE ACCEPTED LEGEND
WEREWOLVES ONLY PROWL DURING A FULL MOON MIGHT BE ERRONEOUS.
OR IT COULD BE A CROCK.
UNLESS THE WEREWOLF WAS USING LAST YEAR'S ALMANAC.
LOOKS LIKE GILES HAS SOME SCHOOLING TO DO.
YES, I MUST ADMIT I'M INTRIGUED.
WEREWOLVES--IT'S ONE OF THE CLASSICS.
I'M SURE MY BOOKS AND I ARE IN FOR A FASCINATING AFTERNOON.
HE NEEDS TO GET A PET.
SUNNYDALE IS BECOMING MORE DANGEROUS ALL THE TIME.
AND A FULL MOON LIKE TONIGHT,
TENDS TO BRING OUT THE CRAZIES,
BUT WITH SOME SIMPLE BASICS OF SELF-DEFENSE,
EACH OF YOU CAN LEARN HOW TO PROTECT YOURSELF.
HERE'S A SUGGESTION: MOVE AWAY FROM THE HELLMOUTH.
TAG.
WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT? HE'S ALL OVER HER.
PSST! HEY, BUDDY, THIS IS A PUBLIC FORUM HERE.
I THINK YOU SPLASHED ON JUST A LITTLE TOO MUCH "OBSESSION FOR DORKS."
...YOU HAVE THE POWER.
OK, EVERYONE GET INTO YOUR ASSIGNED GROUPS.
WHAT HAPPENED?
OH, LAST WEEK SOME HUGE DOG JUMPED OUT OF THE BUSHES AND BIT ME.
39 STITCHES.
THEY OUGHT TO SHOOT THOSE STRAYS.
I'VE BEEN THERE, MAN.
MY COUSIN JORDY JUST GOT HIS GROWN-UP TEETH IN,
DOES NOT LIKE TO BE TICKLED.
HA HA HA.
THERESA,
BE STILL MY SHORTS.
WE'RE IN THE SAME GROUP.
I MAY HAVE TO ATTACK YOU.
NO, ACTUALLY, I THINK, UH, IN OUR GROUP,
THERE ARE A FEW OF US.
AND I'M ONE OF THE FEW.
DON'T FORGET, YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE A MEEK LITTLE GIRLIE-GIRL
LIKE THE REST OF US.
SPOIL MY FUN.
OK, EVERYONE, LISTEN UP.
I WANT TO SHOW YOU WHAT TO DO
SHOULD YOU BE ATTACKED FROM BEHIND.
IN THIS SITUATION, BEND FORWARD,
USING YOUR BACK AND SHOULDERS
TO FLIP THE ASSAILANT OVER TO THE GROUND.
UHH!
OH, SUMMERS, YOU ARE TURNING ME ON.
WELL, THAT WORKS, TOO.
AND, UH, WHILE THERE'S ABSOLUTELY NO SCIENTIFIC EXPLANATION
FOR LUNAR EFFECT ON THE HUMAN PSYCHE,
THE PHASES OF THE MOON
DO SEEM TO EXERT A GREAT DEAL OF PSYCHOLOGICAL INFLUENCE.
AND THE FULL MOON SEEMS TO BRING OUT OUR DARKEST QUALITIES.
AND YET, IRONICALLY, LED TO THE INVENTION OF THE MOON PIE.
OH...
HA HA HA.
MOON PIE.
HA HA HA HA.
HA HA HA HA--
YOU SEE, THE WEREWOLF IS SUCH A POTENT,
EXTREME REPRESENTATION OF OUR INBORN, ANIMALISTIC TRAITS
THAT IT EMERGES FOR 3 FULL CONSECUTIVE NIGHTS--
THE FULL MOON AND, UH, THE 2 NIGHTS SURROUNDING IT.
QUITE THE PARTY ANIMAL.
QUITE. AND IT, UH, ACTS ON PURE INSTINCT, NO CONSCIENCE,
UH, PREDATORY AND AGGRESSIVE.
IN OTHER WORDS, YOUR TYPICAL MALE.
ON BEHALF OF MY GENDER, HEY.
YES, LET'S NOT JUMP TO ANY CONCLUSIONS.
I DIDN'T JUMP. I TOOK A TINY STEP, AND THERE CONCLUSIONS WERE.
THE POINT IS, OUR WOLFMAN COULD ALSO BE A WOLFWOMAN,
OR ANYONE WHO WAS BITTEN BY A WEREWOLF.
SO I'M GUESSING YOUR STANDARD SILVER BULLETS ARE IN ORDER HERE?
NO. NO BULLETS.
NO MATTER WHO THIS WEREWOLF IS, IT'S STILL A HUMAN BEING,
WHO MAY BE COMPLETELY UNAWARE OF HIS OR HER CONDITION.
SO TONIGHT WE BRING 'EM BACK ALIVE.
ANYTHING YET?
YES. AND YOU WON'T BELIEVE WHAT I SAW.
BRITTANY PODELL WAS MAKING OUT WITH OWEN STADEEL,
BUT HE GOES WITH BARRETT WILLIAMS. IF SHE EVER FOUND--
NO. UM, NO--NO SIGN OF THE WEREWOLF. HOW ABOUT YOU?
UH, THE SAME.
I THOUGHT WE MIGHT, UH, I THOUGHT WE MIGHT KNOCK ON A FEW WINDOWS,
UH, ASK IF ANYONE HAS SEEN ANYTHING YET.
GILES, NO ONE'S SEEN ANYTHING.
OH, YES.
NO, OF--OF COURSE NOT, NO.
YES.
G-GOTCHA!
WHAT THE HELL?
GILES! GILES!
HEY!
WHOA!
THE HANDS ARE GOOD RIGHT ABOUT THERE.
WHO--WHO ARE YOU? WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
THE NAME'S CAIN. I'M THE ONE WITH THE GUN,
WHICH MEANS I'M THE ONE WHO GETS TO DO THE INTERVIEWING.
AHEM. HEY, BEFORE WE GET ALL CHUMMY HERE,
HOW ABOUT WE DO SOMETHING ABOUT ME BEING IN THIS NET THING?
MMM!
YOU ALL RIGHT?
YEAH.
I GOT TO SAY, I'M IMPRESSED.
EXCUSE ME?
WELL, IT'S GOOD TO GET THE FRUIT WHILE IT'S FRESH.
YOU'D BE WISE TO TAKE THAT BACK.
HEY, WHAT A MAN AND A GIRL DO IN LOVERS' LANE AT NIGHT
IS NO CONCERN--
OK, HEY, ENOUGH, REPULSIVE BRAIN.
IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK.
WE'RE HUNTING WEREWOLVES.
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!
OK, IT'S FUNNY IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE IN WEREWOLVES.
NO, IT'S FUNNY THINKING ABOUT YOU TWO CATCHING ONE.
I MEAN, THIS GUY LOOKS LIKE HE'S AUDITIONING TO BE A LIBRARIAN,
AND, YOU, WELL,
YOU'RE A GIRL.
I CAN ASSURE YOU SHE'S QUITE CAPABLE.
UH-HUH. LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING, SWEETHEART.
EXACTLY HOW MANY OF THESE ANIMALS HAVE YOU TAKEN OUT?
AS OF TODAY?
I TORE A TOOTH FROM THE MOUTH OF EVERY WEREWOLF THAT I KILLED.
THIS NEXT ONE WILL BRING THE TOTAL TO AN EVEN DOZEN.
SO YOU'RE JUST GONNA KILL IT?
WELL, SEE, THAT'S THE THING.
THEIR PELTS FETCH A PRETTY PENNY IN SRI LANKA,
AND IT'S A LITTLE HARD TO SKIN THEM WHEN THEY'RE ALIVE.
YOU HUNT WEREWOLVES FOR SPORT?
NO, NO, I'M IN IT PURELY FOR THE MONEY.
AND IT DOESN'T BOTHER YOU
THAT A WEREWOLF IS A PERSON 28 DAYS OUT OF THE MONTH?
THAT'S WHY I ONLY HUNT 'EM THE OTHER 3.
I'D REALLY LOVE TO STAY AND CHAT,
BUT I'M ON A TIGHT SCHEDULE.
ANY IDEA WHERE ELSE THE BOYS AND GIRLS
LIKE TO GET TOGETHER AROUND HERE?
YOU'RE LOOKING FOR A PARTY?
NO, BUT THE WEREWOLF IS.
THEY'RE SUCKERS FOR THAT WHOLE SEXUAL HEAT THING.
SENSE IT MILES AWAY.
SINCE THIS LITTLE DOGGIE AIN'T HERE,
I GUESS HE FOUND ANOTHER PLACE.
SORRY. WISH I COULD HELP YOU.
BUT YOU DON'T KNOW SQUAT?
GEE, WHAT A SURPRISE.
WHERE ARE WE GOING?
I THINK I KNOW WHERE TO LOOK.
WE JUST HAVE TO MAKE IT THERE BEFORE MEIN FURRIER.
[RUSTLING]
[LOW GROWL]
AAH!
EVERYTHING OK?
YEAH, I JUST--I THOUGHT I HEARD SOMETHING... BEHIND ME.
NO ONE THERE.
OH.
I GUESS I WAS WRONG.
I COULD HAVE SWORN THAT--
IT'S OK. IT CAN GET PRETTY SCARY OUT HERE, ALL ALONE AT NIGHT.
YEAH.
HEY, DON'T I KNOW YOU FROM SOMEWHERE?
DON'T YOU GO TO SCHOOL WITH BUFFY?
OH, YOU KNOW BUFFY?
YES, I DO, VERY WELL.
OH.
COME ON, I'LL GET YOU HOME.
♪ THEN SWEEP THIS TOWN INTO ♪
♪ A MONSTER TRUCK OF SHAME ♪
♪ CARVED OUT OF SOAP AND STEEL ♪
♪ AND CLAY AND SALTY FAME ♪
♪ YOU ARE THE FIRST TO LOOK AWAY ♪
♪ AND AGAINST ME ♪
♪ YOU SHAKE THE SQUIRREL... ♪
I MEAN, WITH XANDER, IT'S ALWAYS,
"BUFFY DID THIS," "WILLOW SAID THAT."
BUFFY, BUFFY, WILLOW, WILLOW.
IT'S LIKE I DON'T EVEN EXIST.
I SOMETIMES FEEL LIKE THAT.
AND THEN WHEN I CALL HIM ON IT, HE ACTS ALL CONFUSED,
LIKE I'M THE ONE WITH THE PROBLEM.
HIS "DO I SMELL SOMETHING?" LOOK.
ALL PART OF HIS LITTLE GUY GAMES.
IT'S LIKE HE'S THERE, BUT THEN HE'S NOT THERE,
AND HE WANTS IT, BUT THEN HE DOESN'T WANT IT.
HE'S SO BUSY LOOKING AROUND AT EVERYTHING HE DOESN'T HAVE,
HE DOESN'T EVEN REALIZE WHAT HE DOES HAVE.
WELL, HE SHOULD AT LEAST REALIZE THAT YOU HAVE OZ.
MMM, I'M NOT SURE I DO.
OZ AND I ARE IN SOME SORT OF HOLDING PATTERN,
EXCEPT WITHOUT THE HOLDING OR ANYTHING ELSE.
WHAT'S HE WAITING FOR? WHAT'S HIS PROBLEM?
OH, THAT'S RIGHT, HE'S A GUY.
YEAH, HIM AND XANDER. GUYS.
WHO DO THEY THINK THEY ARE?
A COUPLE OF GUYS.
AAH! AAH!
LOOKS AS THOUGH YOUR HUNCH WAS RIGHT.
WHO COULD RESIST SUNNYDALE'S OWN HOUSE OF HORMONES?
THE WEREWOLF, IT'S IN THERE.
COMING THROUGH!
[GROWLING]
YOU LET IT GET AWAY.
I DIDN'T LET IT DO ANYTHING.
I HAD THE CHAIN AROUND ITS NECK.
CHAIN? WHAT WERE YOU GONNA DO, TAKE IT FOR A WALK?
I WAS GOING TO LOCK IT UP.
THAT'S BEAUTIFUL.
THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN A WOMAN TRIES TO DO A MAN'S JOB.
NOW, YOU LOOK HERE, MR. CAIN,
THIS GIRL RISKED HER LIFE TRYING TO CAPTURE A BEAST
THAT YOU HAVEN'T AS YET BEEN ABLE TO FIND.
UH-HUH. DADDY'S DOING A GREAT JOB
CARRYING HER BAG OF MILK BONES.
YOU KNOW, SIS, IF THAT THING OUT THERE HARMS ANYONE,
IT'S GONNA BE ON YOUR PRETTY LITTLE HEAD.
I HOPE YOU CAN LIVE WITH THAT.
I LIVE WITH THAT EVERY DAY.
FIRST THEY TELL ME I CAN'T HUNT AN ELEPHANT FOR ITS IVORY...
I'VE GOT TO DEAL WITH PEOPLE FOR THE ETHICAL TREATMENT OF WEREWOLVES.
BLAERG!
RIGHT, LET'S MOVE OUT.
[SNIFFING]
GILES?
GILES?!
UHH!
I DIDN'T SEE YOU THERE. I THOUGHT SOMETHING HAD HAPPENED.
OH, NO, I'M, UH...
I'M OK. I'M JUST, UH, UH...
JUST--JUST TIRED.
UH, ANY SIGN OF THE WEREWOLF?
NO. I'M GUESSING YOU DIDN'T SEE ANYTHING EITHER
FROM THAT VANTAGE POINT OF HAVING YOUR EYES CLOSED.
IT'S, UH, IT'S-- IT'S, UH, GONNA BE LIGHT SOON,
SO WE'D BETTER-- WAIT.
Radio Newscaster: POLICE SAY THAT THE INCIDENT WAS
APPARENTLY CONNECTED TO THE ANIMAL MUTILATION
WHICH OCCURRED 2 NIGHTS AGO.
THE CORONER'S OFFICE HAS IDENTIFIED THE BODY
AS THAT OF SUNNYDALE HIGH SCHOOL STUDENT THERESA KLUSMEYER, AGE 17.
BUFFY, WE'RE GONNA GET THIS THING.
WE HAVE ANOTHER WHOLE NIGHT.
THERE'S NOTHING MORE WE CAN DO NOW.
IT'S NEARLY SUNRISE.
THAT WEREWOLF WON'T BE A WEREWOLF MUCH LONGER.
HUH.
AUNT MAUREEN. HEY, IT'S ME.
UM, WHAT? OH, IT'S, UH, ACTUALLY, IT'S HEALING OK.
THAT'S PRETTY MUCH THE REASON I CALLED.
UM, I WANTED TO ASK YOU SOMETHING.
IS JORDY A WEREWOLF?
UH-HUH.
AND HOW LONG HAS THAT BEEN GOING ON?
UH-HUH.
WHAT? NO, NO REASON.
UM... THANKS.
YEAH, LOVE TO UNCLE KEN.
I CAN'T BELIEVE I LET THAT THING GET AWAY.
CAIN WAS RIGHT. I SHOULD HAVE KILLED IT WHEN I HAD THE CHANCE.
KILLED WHAT?
UH, THE, UH, THE WEREWOLF.
IT WAS OUT LAST NIGHT.
IS EVERYBODY OK? DID ANYONE GET BITTEN OR--OR SCRATCHED?
NO, WE'RE FINE.
GLADNESS.
YEAH, BUT HE GOT SOMEONE. THERESA.
"GOT," AS IN...
OH, I'M SORRY.
AND I COULD HAVE STOPPED IT.
WELL, WE--WE HAVE ONE MORE NIGHT.
ANOTHER NIGHT? OH, YEAH.
BELIEVE ME, I'M GONNA GIVE THAT WOLFIE SOMETHING TO HOWL ABOUT.
HMM.
BUT WHILE WE HANG HERE DOING NOTHING,
THERE'S A HUMAN WEREWOLF WALKING AROUND OUT THERE,
PROBABLY MAKING FUN OF US.
THE WAY WEREWOLVES ALWAYS DO.
BUT THERE'S REALLY NO WAY TO TELL WHO IT IS.
OH, SURE THERE IS. GILES KNOWS STUFF,
AND I'M PRACTICALLY AN EXPERT ON THE SUBJECT.
ON ACCOUNT OF ONCE YOU WERE A HYENA?
I KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO CRAVE THE TASTE OF FRESHLY KILLED MEAT,
TO BE TAKEN OVER BY THOSE UNCONTROLLABLE URGES.
YOU SAID YOU DIDN'T REMEMBER ANYTHING ABOUT THAT.
HA HA HA HA.
I SAID I DIDN'T REMEMBER ANYTHING ABOUT THAT.
LOOK, THE POINT IS, IS I HAVE AN AFFINITY WITH THIS THING.
I CAN GET INSIDE OF ITS HEAD.
I'M A BIG, BAD WOLF.
I'M ON THE PROWL.
I'M SNIFFING, I'M SNARLING,
I'M A SLOBBERING PREDATOR, I'M--
WAIT A SECOND!
IT'S RIGHT IN FRONT OF US.
IT'S OBVIOUS WHO I AM.
I'M LARRY.
THE GUY'S PRACTICALLY GOT WOLF-BOY STAMPED ON HIS FOREHEAD.
YOU GOT THE DOG BITE, YOU GOT THE AGGRESSION,
NOT TO MENTION THE EXCESSIVE BACK HAIR.
AND HE WAS AWFULLY GLEEFUL ABOUT TORMENTING THERESA.
STILL, THAT DOESN'T NECESSARILY MEAN THAT--
I'M GONNA GO TALK TO HIM.
GONNA FORCE A CONFESSION OUT OF HIM.
GOOD, GO.
UH, IN THE MEANTIME, WE NEED TO COVER OUR BASES.
WILLOW, UM, CHECK THE STUDENT FILES.
SEE IF ANYBODY ELSE FITS THE PROFILE.
UH, BUFFY?
WHERE ARE WE GOING?
IF NONE OF THAT WORKS,
I THINK I MAY HAVE AN ALTERNATIVE.
YEAH, ME AND THE WEREWOLF ALONE IN A CAGE FOR 3 MINUTES.
THAT'S ALL I ASK.
ARE YOU OK?
WHAT?
YOU KIND OF KNEW THERESA.
OH, YEAH, I, UH,
I'M TRYING NOT TO THINK ABOUT IT.
IT'S--IT'S A LOT.
IT IS. BUT WE CAN DO STUFF TO HELP.
SOMETIMES IT FEELS GOOD TO HELP.
UH-HUH.
WELL, LIKE...
LOOKING UP STUFF.
I'M GONNA BE DOING THAT MOST OF THE NIGHT.
YOU COULD HELP ME, HELP TOGETHER?
I CAN'T. UM, UH, I'M BUSY.
OH.
SO...
I--I GOTTA GO.
HARRIS. SHEESH, NEXT TIME WEAR A BELL.
WHY SO JUMPY, LARRY?
GEEKS MAKE ME NERVOUS.
IS THAT REALLY IT OR IS THERE SOMETHING YOU'RE HIDING?
I COULD HIDE MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I KNOW YOUR SECRET, BIG GUY.
I KNOW WHAT YOU'VE BEEN DOING AT NIGHT.
YOU KNOW, HARRIS, THAT NOSY LITTLE NOSE OF YOURS
IS GOING TO GET YOU INTO TROUBLE SOMEDAY...
LIKE TODAY.
HURTING ME ISN'T GOING TO MAKE THIS GO AWAY.
PEOPLE ARE STILL GOING TO FIND OUT.
ALL RIGHT, WHAT DO YOU WANT?
HUSH MONEY? IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE AFTER?
I DON'T WANT ANYTHING. I JUST WANT TO HELP.
WHAT, YOU THINK YOU HAVE A CURE?
NO, IT'S JUST-- I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE GOING THROUGH
BECAUSE I'VE BEEN THERE.
THAT'S WHY I KNOW YOU SHOULD TALK ABOUT IT.
YEAH, THAT'S EASY FOR YOU TO SAY.
I MEAN, YOU'RE NOBODY.
I'VE GOT A REPUTATION.
LARRY, PLEASE, BEFORE SOMEONE ELSE GETS HURT.
LOOK, IF THIS GETS OUT, IT'S OVER FOR ME.
I MEAN, FORGET ABOUT PLAYING FOOTBALL.
THEY'LL RUN ME OUT OF THIS TOWN.
I MEAN, COME ON, HOW ARE PEOPLE GOING TO LOOK AT ME
AFTER THEY FIND OUT I'M GAY.
OH, WOW. I SAID IT.
AND IT FELT OK.
I'M GAY. I AM GAY.
I HEARD YOU THE FIRST TIME.
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. IT WAS ALMOST EASY.
I NEVER FELT I COULD TELL ANYONE.
AND THEN YOU-- YOU OF ALL PEOPLE.
YOU BRING IT OUT OF ME.
IT PROBABLY WOULD HAVE SLIPPED OUT
EVEN IF I WASN'T HERE.
NO, NO, BECAUSE KNOWING YOU WENT THROUGH THE SAME THING,
MADE IT EASIER FOR ME TO ADMIT IT.
THE SAME THING...
IT'S IRONIC.
I MEAN, ALL THOSE TIMES I BEAT THE CRAP OUT OF YOU,
IT MUST HAVE BEEN BECAUSE I RECOGNIZED SOMETHING IN YOU
THAT I DIDN'T WANT TO BELIEVE ABOUT MYSELF.
LARRY, NO, I AM NOT--
OF COURSE, OF COURSE NOT. DON'T WORRY.
I WOULDN'T DO THAT TO YOU.
YOUR SECRET'S SAFE WITH ME.
WOW.
SO WHAT'S THE SCUTTLEBUTT?
ANYBODY BESIDES LARRY
FIT OUR WEREWOLF PROFILE?
THERE IS ONE NAME THAT KEEPS GETTING SPIT OUT.
AGGRESSIVE BEHAVIOR, RUN-INS WITH AUTHORITIES.
ABOUT A SCREENFUL OF VIOLENT INCIDENTS.
OK, MOST OF THOSE WERE NOT MY FAULT.
SOMEBODY ELSE STARTED THEM.
I WAS JUST STANDING UP FOR MYSELF.
THEY SAY IT'S A GOOD IDEA TO COUNT TO 10 WHEN YOU'RE ANGRY.
1... 2... 3...
I'LL KEEP LOOKING.
UM, I NOTICED YOU WERE LOOKING SOLO.
YEAH. OZ WANTED TO BE SOMEPLACE
THAT WAS AWAY FROM ME.
I'M SORRY.
I CAN'T FIGURE HIM OUT.
I MEAN, HE'S SO HOT AND COLD
OR LUKE-WARM AND COLD.
WELCOME TO THE MYSTERY THAT IS MEN.
I THINK IT GOES SOMETHING, LIKE, THEY GROW BODY HAIR,
THEY LOSE ALL ABILITY TO TELL YOU WHAT THEY REALLY WANT.
IT DOESN'T SEEM LIKE A FAIR TRADE.
WELL, IF YOU WANT TO UP THE SPEED QUOTIENT WITH OZ,
MAYBE YOU NEED TO DO SOMETHING DARING.
MAYBE YOU NEED TO MAKE THE FIRST MOVE.
WELL, THAT WON'T MAKE ME A SLUT?
I THINK YOUR REPUTATION WILL REMAIN INTACT.
IT USED TO BE SO MUCH EASIER
TO TELL IF A BOY LIKED YOU.
HE'D PUNCH YOU ON THE ARM
AND THEN RUN BACK TO HIS FRIENDS.
THOSE WERE THE DAYS.
HEY.
I'LL SEE YOU GUYS LATER.
CORDELIA ASKED ME TO LOOK OVER HER HISTORY HOMEWORK BEFORE CLASS.
I THINK THAT MEANS I MIGHT HAVE TO DO IT.
WOW, THOSE 2 GALS ARE HANGING OUT A LOT TOGETHER.
THIS WOULD BE A GOOD TIME TO PANIC.
SO HOW'D IT GO WITH LARRY?
WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?
I THINK IT'S SUPPOSED TO MEAN SO HOW'D IT GO WITH LARRY?
HE'S NOT THE WEREWOLF.
CAN'T WE JUST LEAVE IT AT THAT?
MUST YOU CONTINUE TO PUSH AND PUSH?
I'M SORRY. I WAS JUST WONDERING.
WELL, HE'S NOT.
OK. OK.
BUT THERE GOES OUR LEAD SUSPECT.
WHICH THEN PUTS US RIGHT BACK AT SQUARE BONED.
YOU'RE NOT BONED, YOU'RE BUFFY.
ERADICATOR OF EVIL. DEFENDER OF, UM,
THINGS THAT NEED DEFENDING.
TELL THAT TO THERESA.
SHE COULD HAVE USED MY DEFENDING
BEFORE SHE WAS RIPPED APART BY THAT...
WEREWOLF.
NOWHERE IN ANY OF THE REPORTS
DID IT SAY ANYTHING ABOUT HER BEING MAULED.
I MEAN, THEY WERE LINKED TO THE ANIMAL ATTACKS FROM THE OTHER NIGHT,
SO WE JUST ASSUMED WEREWOLF.
WHAT ELSE SHOULD WE HAVE ASSUMED?
Buffy: VAMPIRE.
SO THAT'S GOOD, RIGHT?
I MEAN IN THE SENSE THAT THE WEREWOLF DIDN'T GET HER.
NO. THERE IS NO GOOD HERE.
NO GOOD.
INSTEAD OF NOT PROTECTING THERESA FROM THE WEREWOLF,
I WAS ABLE TO NOT PROTECT HER FROM SOMETHING JUST AS BAD.
SHE HAD A LOT OF FRIENDS.
BUFFY, YOU CAN'T BLAME YOURSELF FOR EVERY DEATH THAT HAPPENS IN SUNNYDALE.
IF IT WEREN'T FOR YOU, PEOPLE WOULD BE LINED UP 5 DEEP
WAITING TO GET THEMSELVES BURIED.
WILLOW WOULD BE ROBBIE THE ROBOT'S LOVE SLAVE,
I WOULDN'T EVEN HAVE A HEAD,
AND THERESA'S A VAMPIRE.
[GROWLING]
ANGEL SENDS HIS LOVE.
ANGEL.
ARE YOU OK?
THIS ISN'T HAPPENING.
HE'S GOING TO KEEP COMING AFTER ME.
DON'T LET HIM GET TO YOU.
HE'S NOT THE SAME GUY YOU KNEW.
OH, NO, MY LIFE'S NOT TOO COMPLICATED.
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
WILLOW, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
I HAVE THIS WHOLE THING WORKED OUT.
I HAD IT WRITTEN DOWN,
BUT THEN IT DIDN'T MAKE ANY SENSE WHEN I WAS READING IT BACK.
WILLOW, THIS IS NOT A VERY GOOD TIME.
I MEAN, WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO THINK?
FIRST, YOU BUY ME POPCORN AND THEN YOU'RE ALL GLAD THAT I DIDN'T GET BIT.
AND YOU PUT THE TAG BACK IN MY SHIRT.
BUT I GUESS NONE OF THAT MEANS ANYTHING
BECAUSE INSTEAD OF LOOKING UP NAMES WITH ME,
HERE YOU ARE ALL ALONE IN YOUR HOUSE DOING NOTHING BY YOURSELF.
WILLOW, WE'LL TALK ABOUT THIS TOMORROW.
NO, DAMN IT!
WE'LL TALK ABOUT THIS NOW.
BUFFY TOLD ME THAT SOMETIMES WHAT A GIRL MAKES
HAS TO BE THE FIRST MOVE, AND NOW THAT I'M SAYING THIS,
I'M STARTING TO THINK THAT THE WRITTEN VERSION SOUNDED PRETTY GOOD,
BUT YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.
I KNOW, I KNOW, IT'S ME.
I'M GOING THROUGH SOME CHANGES.
WELL, WELCOME TO THE WORLD!
THINGS HAPPEN. DON'T YOU THINK I'M GOING THROUGH A LOT?
NOT LIKE ME.
OH, WHAT, SO NOW YOU'RE SPECIAL?
YOU'RE SPECIAL BOY...
WITH CHAINS AND STUFF.
WHY DO YOU HAVE CHAINS AND STUFF?
WILLOW, PLEASE!
GET OUT OF HERE!
OZ?
OZ, WHAT IS IT?
WHAT'S WRONG?
[PAINED GROANS]
AAH!
[HOWLING]
THERE YOU ARE.
SORRY I'M LATE.
I HAD TO DO SOME UNSCHEDULED SLAYAGE IN THE FORM OF THERESA.
SHE'S A VAMPIRE?
WAS. ANGEL SENT HER TO ME.
A LITTLE TOKEN OF HIS AFFECTION.
BUFFY, I'M SO SORRY.
NOT NOW, GILES.
WE CAN ALL HAVE OURSELVES A GOOD CRY
AFTER WE BAG US A WEREWOLF.
[GROWLING]
[CLICKING]
ALL SET. LET'S GO FIND THIS THING.
ONE QUESTION. HOW EXACTLY DO WE FIND THIS THING?
IT'S OZ! IT'S OZ!
WHAT'S OZ?
THE WEREWOLF. ARE YOU CERTAIN?
CAN'T YOU JUST TRUST ME ON THIS?
HE SAID HE WAS GOING THROUGH ALL THESE CHANGES.
THEN HE WENT THROUGH ALL THESE CHANGES.
WHERE IS HE NOW? IN THE WOODS.
LET'S GO. GO WHERE?
YOU'RE NOT GOING TO KILL OZ.
YEAH, HE'S A WEREWOLF, BUT HE DOESN'T MEAN TO BE.
DON'T WORRY, WILLOW. WE'RE NOT GOING TO HURT HIM.
I PUT ENOUGH PHENOBARBITAL IN THIS THING
TO SINK A SMALL ELEPHANT.
IT SHOULD BE ENOUGH FOR A LARGE WEREWOLF.
THAT'S IT. LET ME SEE YOU.
COME ON. SUPPERTIME.
GOOD DOGGY.
NOW PLAY DEAD.
CAREFUL!
DAMN IT!
I SHOT OZ.
YOU SAVED US.
NO WONDER THIS TOWN'S OVERRUN WITH MONSTERS.
NO ONE HERE'S MAN ENOUGH TO KILL THEM.
OH, I WOULDN'T BE TOO SURE OF THAT.
HOW ABOUT YOU LET THE DOOR HIT YOU IN THE ASS
ON THE WAY OUT OF TOWN?
YOU THINK IT'LL BE OK?
HE'LL BE A LITTLE SORE IN THE MORNING,
BUT HE'LL BE OZ.
THIS IS ALL SO WEIRD.
I MEAN, HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO ACT WHEN WE SEE HIM?
WELL, IT'S GOTTA BE WEIRD FOR HIM, TOO.
NOW THAT WE KNOW SO MUCH.
ALL I KNOW IS I'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO LOOK AT HIM THE SAME AGAIN.
HE'S STILL A HUMAN BEING...
MOST OF THE TIME.
WHO ARE WE TALKING ABOUT?
OZ. WHO ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
NO ONE.
HEY, LET ME GET THOSE.
HEY, XANDER. LOOK, ABOUT WHAT YOU DID.
I OWE YOU.
WHAT'D YOU DO?
IT'S REALLY NOTHING WE SHOULD BE TALKING ABOUT EVER.
I KNOW, I KNOW. IT'S JUST, WELL, THANKS.
THAT WAS WEIRD.
WHAT, IT'S NOT OK FOR ONE GUY TO LIKE ANOTHER GUY
JUST BECAUSE HE HAPPENED TO BE IN THE LOCKER ROOM WITH HIM
WHEN ABSOLUTELY NOTHING HAPPENED.
AND I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU NOT TO PUSH.
ALL I MEANT IS THAT HE DIDN'T TRY TO LOOK UP MY SKIRT.
OH, OH, YEAH, THAT'S-- THAT'S THE WEIRDNESS.
WEIRDNESS ABOUNDS LATELY.
MAYBE IT'S THE MOON.
IT DOES STUFF TO PEOPLE.
I'VE HEARD THAT.
CERTAINLY GOING TO PUT A STRAIN ON WILLOW
AND OZ'S RELATIONSHIP.
WHAT RELATIONSHIP?
I MEAN, WHAT LIFE COULD THEY POSSIBLY HAVE TOGETHER?
WE'RE TALKING OBEDIENCE SCHOOL, PAPER TRAINING,
OZ IS ALWAYS IN BACK BURYING THEIR THINGS,
AND THAT KIND OF BREED CAN TURN ON ITS OWNER.
I DON'T KNOW. I KIND OF SEE OZ AS THE LOYAL TYPE.
ALL I'M SAYING IS SHE'S NOT SAFE WITH HIM. IF IT WERE UP TO ME...
XANDER...
IT'S NOT UP TO YOU.
HEY.
DID YOU WANT TO GO FIRST?
I SPOKE TO GILES. HE SAID I'LL BE OK.
I JUST HAVE TO LOCK MYSELF UP AROUND THE FULL MOON.
ONLY HE USED MORE WORDS THAN THAT...
AND A GLOBE.
I'M SORRY ABOUT HOW ALL THIS ENDED UP.
WITH ME SHOOTING YOU AND ALL.
IT'S OK. I'M--I'M SORRY I ALMOST ATE YOU.
IT'S OK.
I KIND OF THOUGHT YOU WOULD HAVE TOLD ME.
I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.
I MEAN, IT'S NOT EVERY DAY YOU FIND OUT YOU'RE A WEREWOLF.
THAT'S FAIRLY FREAK-SOME.
IT MAY TAKE A COUPLE DAYS OF GETTING USED TO.
YEAH. IT'S A COMPLICATION.
SO...
MAYBE IT'D BE BEST IF I JUST, SORTA...
WHAT?
WELL, YOU KNOW, LIKE, STAYED OUT OF YOUR WAY FOR AWHILE.
I DON'T KNOW.
I'M KIND OF OK WITH YOU BEING IN MY WAY.
YOU MEAN, YOU'D STILL...
WELL, I LIKE YOU.
YOU'RE NICE AND YOU'RE FUNNY.
AND YOU DON'T SMOKE.
YEAH, OK, WEREWOLF,
BUT THAT'S NOT ALL THE TIME.
I MEAN, 3 DAYS OUT OF THE MONTH
I'M NOT MUCH FUN TO BE AROUND, EITHER.
YOU ARE QUITE THE HUMAN.
SO, I'D STILL IF YOU'D STILL.
I'D STILL. I'D VERY STILL.
OK. NO BITING THOUGH.
AGREED.
A WEREWOLF IN LOVE.
GRR. ARRRGH.