YOU ARE THE SLAYER.
TO EACH GENERATION A SLAYER IS BORN--
ONE GIRL IN ALL THE WORLD, A CHOSEN ONE.
Xander: WHO'S THAT?
Willow: THAT MUST BE ANGEL.
Giles: LAST SEASON ON "BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER..."
[GROWLS] AAH!
A VAMPIRE IN LOVE WITH A SLAYER.
IT'S RATHER POETIC.
AND IN THIS TIME SHALL COME THE ANOINTED.
Giles: BUFFY WILL FACE THE MASTER, AND SHE WILL DIE.
SHE'S NOT BREATHING. SHE'S DEAD.
BREATHE! COME ON.
YOU'RE DEAD.
I MAY BE DEAD, BUT I'M STILL PRETTY.
AAH!
[THE MASTER GROANING]
Willow: OK. UM...
Xander: IT'S YOUR TURN.
ALL RIGHT. OK. UH...
IN THE FEW HOURS THAT WE HAD TOGETHER,
WE LOVED A LIFETIME'S WORTH.
TERMINATOR.
GOOD. RIGHT.
OK. I GOT ONE.
[AS CHARLTON HESTON] IT'S A MADHOUSE! A MAD--
PLANET OF THE APES.
CAN I FINISH, PLEASE?
OH. SORRY. GO AHEAD.
HOUSE!
PLANET OF THE APES.
OK. GOOD. ME.
UH...
WELL?
I'M THINKING.
USE THE FORCE, LUKE.
DO I EVEN HAVE TO DIGNIFY THAT WITH A GUESS?
I COULDN'T THINK OF ANYTHING.
IT'S A DUMB GAME, ANYWAY.
WHAT ELSE DO YOU WANT TO DO?
WE ALREADY PLAYED ROCK/PAPER/SCISSORS. MY HAND'S CRAMPED UP.
WELL, YES, IF YOU'RE ALWAYS SCISSORS,
OF COURSE YOUR TENDONS--
YOU KNOW, I'VE JUST GOTTA SAY
THAT THIS HAS BEEN THE MOST BORING SUMMER EVER.
YEAH, BUT ON THE PLUS SIDE, NO MONSTERS OR STUFF.
I'M JUST SO RESTLESS.
I'M ACTUALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO SCHOOL STARTING UP AGAIN.
YEAH, AND THAT WOULDN'T HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH A CERTAIN GIRL WE BOTH KNOW
WHO IS A VAMPIRE SLAYER?
PLEASE. I'M SO OVER HER.
DID SHE, UM, MENTION WHEN SHE MIGHT BE GETTIN' BACK?
ABOUT WHICH I DO NOT CARE.
I HAVEN'T HEARD FROM HER.
I GOT A COUPLE OF POSTCARDS WHEN SHE WENT TO L.A.,
BUT THEN, LIKE, NOTHING.
WELL, SHE'S PROBABLY WITH HER DAD, HAVING A GOOD TIME.
AND YOU DON'T CARE?
WELL, OK, THERE MIGHT BE SOME INTEREST.
I'M A MAN. I HAVE CERTAIN DESIRES, CERTAIN NEEDS.
AH, I DON'T WANNA KNOW.
I GOT A MOVIE FOR YA.
XANDER!
YOU'RE AMISH.
YOU CAN'T FIGHT BACK 'CAUSE YOU'RE AMISH.
I MOCK YOU WITH MY ICE CREAM CONE, AMISH GUY.
WITNESS.
MY NOSE IS COLD.
LET ME GET THAT FOR YA.
XANDER!
SORRY. I CAN'T HELP MYSELF.
YOUR NOSE LOOKS SO TASTY.
AAH!
WILLOW, GO!
RROWWRRR!
HI, GUYS.
RRRRR!
MISS ME?
[WOLF HOWLING]
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
Willow: BUFFY!
HEY.
HEY, WILL.
MAN, YOUR TIMING REALLY DOESN'T SUCK.
WHEN DID YOU GET BACK?
UH, JUST NOW. DAD DROVE ME DOWN,
AND I FIGURED YOU TWO LOSERS
WOULD BE GETTING INTO SOME KIND OF TROUBLE.
I THINK WE HAD THE UPPER HAND,
IN A SUBTLE WAY.
DOES EITHER OF YOU EVEN HAVE A CROSS? VERY SLOPPY.
WELL, IT'S BEEN A SLOW SUMMER.
THAT'S THE FIRST VAMPIRE WE'VE SEEN SINCE YOU KILLED THE MASTER.
IT'S LIKE THEY KNEW I WAS COMING BACK.
SO WHAT ABOUT YOU? HOW WAS YOUR SUMMER? DID YOU SLAY ANYTHING?
NO. UH, JUST HUNG OUT, PARTIED SOME.
SHOPPING WAS ALSO A MAJOR THEME.
WELL, YOU HAVEN'T LOST YOUR TOUCH. THAT VAMPIRE...
I DID KINDA WAIL ON HIM, DIDN'T I?
I LIKE YOUR HAIR.
SO HOW DID YOU GUYS FARE? DID YOU HAVE ANY FUN WITHOUT ME?
YES. NO.
WELL, OUR SUMMER WAS KINDA YAWNWORTHY.
OUR BIGGEST EXCITEMENT WAS BURYING THE MASTER.
THAT'S RIGHT. YOU MISSED IT. RIGHT OUT BY THAT TREE.
GILES BURIED THE BONES, AND WE POURED HOLY WATER.
WE GOT TO WEAR ROBES.
VERY INTENSE. YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN.
HAVE YOU SEEN GILES?
WHY WOULD I DO THAT? I'LL SEE HIM AT SCHOOL.
MAN, I'M REALLY GLAD YOU'RE BACK.
ME, TOO.
OKAY, THEN. THIS IS THE LAST OF IT.
MORE CLOTHES?
OH, DO SHOES COUNT AS CLOTHES?
HOW MUCH SHOPPING DID YOU LET HER DO?
I JUST THOUGHT I WAS SAVING YOU
FROM THE BIG BACK-TO-SCHOOL CLOTHING NIGHTMARE.
MY NIGHTMARES OF BUFFY IN SCHOOL HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH CLOTHES.
DID SHE MANAGE TO STAY OUT OF TROUBLE IN L.A.?
SHE DID. YEAH.
SHE WAS, UM...
YOU KNOW...GREAT.
BUT...
SHE WAS JUST, I DON'T KNOW...
DISTANT.
NOT BROODING OR SULKING,
JUST...THERE WAS NO CONNECTION.
THE MORE TIME WE SPENT TOGETHER,
THE MORE I FELT LIKE SHE WAS NOWHERE TO BE SEEN.
HENCE THE SHOES?
I MAY HAVE OVERCOMPENSATED A LITTLE BIT.
IT'S SO STRANGE.
YOU KNOW, AT LEAST WHEN SHE WAS BURNING STUFF DOWN,
I KNEW WHAT TO SAY.
WELCOME TO MY WORLD.
I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO GET THROUGH TO HER FOR SO LONG.
I'LL JUST BE HAPPY IF SHE MAKES IT THROUGH THE SCHOOL YEAR.
Cordelia: IT WAS A NIGHTMARE, A TOTAL NIGHTMARE.
I MEAN, THEY PROMISED ME THEY'D TAKE ME TO ST. CROIX.
AND THEN THEY JUST DECIDE TO GO TO TUSCANY.
ART AND BUILDINGS?
I WAS TOTALLY BEACHLESS FOR A MONTH AND A HALF.
NO ONE HAS SUFFERED LIKE I HAVE SUFFERED.
OF COURSE, I THINK THAT THAT KIND OF ADVERSITY BUILDS CHARACTER.
WELL, THEN I THOUGHT, "I ALREADY HAVE A LOT OF CHARACTER."
IS IT POSSIBLE TO HAVE TOO MUCH CHARACTER?
Mr. Snyder: THE FIRST DAY BACK-- IT ALWAYS GETS ME.
YES.
I MEAN, IT'S INCREDIBLE.
ONE DAY THE CAMPUS IS COMPLETELY BARE, EMPTY.
THE NEXT...THERE ARE CHILDREN EVERYWHERE.
LIKE LOCUSTS.
CRAWLING AROUND, MINDLESSLY BENT ON FEEDING AND MATING.
DESTROYING EVERYTHING IN SIGHT IN THEIR RELENTLESS, POINTLESS
DESIRE TO EXIST.
WELL, I DO ENJOY THESE PEP TALKS.
HAVE YOU EVER CONSIDERED, GIVEN YOUR ABHORRENCE OF CHILDREN,
THAT SCHOOL PRINCIPAL WAS NOT, PERHAPS, YOUR TRUE VOCATION?
SOMEBODY'S GOTTA KEEP AN EYE ON THEM.
JUST A BUNCH OF HORMONAL TIME BOMBS.
EVERY TIME A PRETTY GIRL WALKS BY,
EVERY BOY TURNS INTO A GIBBERING FOOL.
MS. CALENDAR.
MR. GILES.
WELL, I--I--I--UM...
HELLO.
I SEE THE WAY THESE KIDS GAZE AT EACH OTHER...
ALL MOONY.
IT'S GOOD TO SEE YOU.
YES.
YOU THINK THEY'RE THINKING ABOUT LEARNING?
EH, WERE YOU HEADED TO THE, UH, FACULTY ROOM?
SOUNDS LIKE FUN.
I TRY AND TELL THEM ABOUT THE IMPORTANT THINGS IN LIFE.
DISCIPLINE, RESPONSIBILITY, PUNCTUALITY.
I MIGHT AS WELL BE TALKING TO MYSELF.
HOW WAS YOUR SUMMER?
EXTREME. I DID BURNING MAN IN BLACK ROCK.
OH, SUCH A GREAT FESTIVAL.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THERE.
THEY HAD DRUM RITUALS, MOBILE SCULPTURES, RAVES, NAKED MUD DANCES.
YOU WOULD HAVE JUST-- HATED IT WITH A FIERY PASSION.
YES, I--I CAN'T IMAGINE FINDING ANY REDEEMING, UH...
NAKED?
MMM. AND YOU PROBABLY SPENT ALL SUMMER
WITH YOUR NOSE IN A BOOK.
YES. I SUPPOSE YOU CONSIDER THAT FRIGHTFULLY DULL.
IT DEPENDS ON THE BOOK.
GILES!
YO, G-MAN! WHAT'S UP?
NICE TO SEE YOU, AND DON'T EVER CALL ME THAT.
HEY, KIDS.
HEY. HI.
HOW ARE YOU?
LIVE AND KICKIN'.
BUFFY KILLED A VAMPIRE LAST NIGHT.
UH, I THINK YOU CAN GET A LITTLE MORE VOLUME
IF YOU SPEAK FROM THE DIAPHRAGM.
SORRY.
WE'VE GOT VAMPIRES? I THOUGHT THE HELLMOUTH WAS CLOSED.
WELL, IT'S CLOSED, BUT IT'S NOT GONE.
THE MYSTICAL ENERGY THAT EMANATES FROM IT IS STILL CONCENTRATED IN THIS AREA.
WHICH MEANS WE'RE STILL THE UNDEAD'S FAVORITE PARTY TOWN.
I WONDER IF THEY'RE HERE ANY PURPOSE IN PARTICULAR.
YOU'RE THE WATCHER. I JUST WORK HERE.
YES. I MUST CONSULT MY BOOKS.
OH, 8 MINUTES AND 33 SECONDS. PAY UP.
I CALLED 10 MINUTES
BEFORE YOU'D CONSULT YOUR BOOKS ABOUT SOMETHING.
THANK YOU.
[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]
WE'D BETTER GET TO CLASS.
YEAH.
OH, UH, BUFFY.
EH, I REALIZED YOU'VE ONLY JUST RETURNED,
BUT WHEN YOU'RE READY, I THINK WE SHOULD START YOUR TRAINING AGAIN.
I'M READY. I'LL SEE YA AFTER SCHOOL.
WELL, I UNDERSTAND,
IF YOU WANT A FEW DAYS TO--
I'M READY.
BUFFY, THAT'S ENOUGH.
BUFFY!
WELL, IT'S SAFE TO SAY YOU'VE STAYED IN SHAPE.
I'M READY.
WHATEVER THEY GOT COMIN' NEXT, I'M READY.
YEAH.
Absalom: WE HAVE BEEN PUT DOWN, KINSMEN.
WE HAVE LOST OUR WAY.
WE HAVE LOST THE NIGHT.
BUT DESPAIR IS FOR THE LIVING.
WHERE THEY ARE WEAK, WE WILL BE STRONG.
WHERE THEY WEEP, WE REJOICE.
WHERE THEY BLEED--HA HA HA-- WE DRINK!
HA HA HA!
WITHIN 3 DAYS, A NEW HOPE WILL ARISE.
WE WILL PUT OUR FAITH IN HIM.
HE...WILL SHOW US THE WAY.
BUFFY.
FINE! I'M FINE.
GOOD.
IT'S GOOD THAT YOU'RE FINE.
WHAT WERE YOU THINKING ABOUT?
NOTHIN'.
OH, COME ON. YOU CAN TELL US.
WE'RE YOUR BOSOM FRIENDS. THE FRIENDS OF YOUR BOSOM.
XANDER.
I WASN'T THINKING ANYTHING, REALLY.
WHAT DID YOU DO LAST NIGHT?
MM. SLEPT. I HAD WEIRD DREAMS.
DREAMS ARE MEANINGFUL.
SHEESH. TELL ME ABOUT IT.
THE OTHER NIGHT I DREAMT THAT XANDER--
UH, IT WASN'T XANDER.
I-IN FACT, IT WASN'T ME.
IT WAS A FRIEND'S DREAM, AND SHE DOESN'T REMEMBER IT.
I BET SHE DOESN'T.
BUFFY.
GILES.
WHAT IS IT? YOU LOOK WORRIED.
THIS VAMPIRE ACTIVITY, I THINK I KNOW WHAT THEY'RE UP TO.
WELL, WE'LL DEAL WITH IT.
I HOPE IT'S THAT SIMPLE.
IT IS NOT TO WORRY. TRUST ME.
I DON'T KNOW. I MEAN, I'VE KILLED YOU ONCE.
IT SHOULDN'T BE TOO DIFFICULT TO DO IT AGAIN.
WHAT?
[BUFFY STRUGGLING]
HELLO.
MIND IF I COME IN?
BE MY GUEST.
HOW ARE YA?
PEACHY.
SO IS THIS A SOCIAL CALL?
IT IS KINDA LATE--
OR, WELL, IT IS FOR ME, ANYWAY.
WHAT IS IT FOR YOU, LUNCH HOUR?
IT'S NOT A SOCIAL CALL.
AH, SO LET ME GUESS. THAT MEANS GRAVE DANGER.
GOSH, IT'S GOOD TO BE HOME.
I'M SORRY. I WISH I HAD BETTER NEWS.
SO...SOME OF YOUR COUSINS ARE IN TOWN FOR A FAMILY BARBECUE,
AND WE'RE ALL ON THE MENU.
THE ANOINTED ONE.
HE'S BEEN GATHERING FORCES SOMEWHERE IN TOWN.
I'M NOT SURE WHY.
GUESS I'LL FIND OUT SOON ENOUGH, HUH?
YOU DON'T SOUND TOO CONCERNED.
I CAN HANDLE MYSELF.
BESIDES...I COULD USE A LITTLE ACTION, ANYWAY.
DON'T UNDERESTIMATE THE ANOINTED ONE
JUST BECAUSE HE LOOKS LIKE A CHILD.
HE HAS POWER OVER THE REST OF THEM.
THEY'LL DO ANYTHING FOR HIM.
IS THAT IT?
IS THAT EVERYTHING?
YOU KNOW, 'CAUSE YOU WOKE ME UP
FROM A REALLY GOOD DREAM.
SORRY.
I'LL GO.
I MISSED YOU.
I MISSED YOU?
HOW ARE YOUR NEW CLASSES?
GOOD.
IS THERE THE SLIGHTEST CHANCE
THAT IF I ASKED YOU WHAT WAS WRONG, YOU WOULD TELL ME?
OF COURSE NOT.
IT WOULD TAKE THE FUN OUT OF GUESSING.
ANGEL STOPPED BY?
WOW. WAS THERE--
WELL, I MEAN-- WAS IT HAVING TO DO WITH KISSING?
WILLOW, GROW UP.
NOT EVERYTHING IS ABOUT KISSING.
YEAH. SOME STUFF'S ABOUT GROPING.
IT WASN'T ABOUT GROPING?
OK, HORMONES ON PARADE HERE, IT WAS PURE SHOP TALK.
REMEMBER VAMPIRES? POINTY TEETH, THEY WALK BY NIGHT.
AM I RINGING A BELL?
WHAT DID HE SAY?
OH, SOMETHING'S UP.
NOTHIN' I CAN'T HANDLE.
OH, HEY, DID YOU GUYS HEAR
THAT CIBO MATTO'S GONNA BE AT THE BRONZE TONIGHT?
CIBO MATTO? THEY'RE PLAYING?
NO, WILLOW. THEY'RE GONNA BE CLOG DANCING.
CIBO MATTO CAN CLOG DANCE?!
OH, SARCASM. RIGHT.
WE SHOULD ATTEND, NO?
OH, LOOK, IT'S THE THREE MUSKETEERS.
WAS THAT AN INSULT?
IT KINDA LACKED PUNCH.
THE THREE MUSKETEERS WERE COOL.
I SEE YOUR POINT.
I WOULD HAVE GONE WITH STOOGES.
WELL, I JUST MEANT THAT YOU GUYS ALWAYS HANG OUT TOGETHER.
SO DID YOU GUYS FIGHT ANY DEMONS THIS SUMMER?
UH, YES, OUR OWN PERSONAL DEMONS.
SUCH AS--AS--AS LUST AND, UM, THRIFT.
I WOULD HAVE TO GO WITH STOOGES, ALSO.
WHAT ARE YOU GUYS TALKING ABOUT?
I'M TALKING ABOUT BIG, SQUIGGLY DEMONS THAT CAME FROM THE GROUND?
REMEMBER? PROM NIGHT? WITH ALL THE VAMPIRES?
CORDELIA, YOUR MOUTH IS OPEN, SOUND IS COMING FROM IT.
THIS IS NEVER GOOD.
IT'S--SEE, WE CAN'T MENTION THAT STUFF IN FRONT OF OTHER PEOPLE.
BUFFY BEING THE SLAYER AND ALL.
YOU HAVEN'T BEEN TALKING ABOUT OUR LITTLE ADVENTURE ALL SUMMER, HAVE YOU?
ARE YOU NUTS?
YOU THINK I WOULD TELL PEOPLE
THAT I SPENT THE WHOLE EVENING WITH YOU?
BESIDES, IT WAS ALL SO CREEPY.
THAT MASTER GUY AND ALL THE SCREAMING?
I DON'T EVEN LIKE TO THINK ABOUT IT.
SO...YOUR SECRET'S SAFE WITH ME.
WELL, THAT WORKS OUT GREAT.
YOU WON'T TELL ANYONE THAT I'M A SLAYER,
AND I WON'T TELL ANYONE YOU'RE A MORON.
NOW, THAT WAS A GOOD INSULT.
A LITTLE TOO GOOD.
WHAT'S UP WITH HER?
♪ ♪
I JUST THINK SOMETHING'S UP, IS ALL.
WILLOW, YOU'RE PARANOID.
BUFFY'S NEVER ACTED LIKE THIS BEFORE.
EVER SINCE SHE GOT BACK, SHE'S...DIFFERENT.
WELL, BUFFY'S ALWAYS BEEN DIFFERENT.
SHE'S NEVER BEEN MEAN.
ANY SIGN OF HER? SHE SAID SHE WAS COMING.
NO. THE BAND'S COOL, THOUGH.
YEAH, COOL.
YA GOT SOMETHING ON YOUR NOSE.
DON'T JUST STAND THERE.
DIG.
WE HAVE TO HURRY.
AAH!
THE GROUND! IT'S CONSECRATED.
IT BURNS!
DIG.
[MOANING]
HI.
SO IS THERE DANGER AT THE BRONZE?
SHOULD I BEWARE?
LOOK, I CAN'T HELP THINKIN'
I'VE DONE SOMETHING TO MAKE YOU ANGRY.
AND THAT BOTHERS ME MORE THAN I'D LIKE.
I'M NOT ANGRY.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE THAT COMES FROM.
WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF?
ME?
US?
COULD YOU CONTEMPLATE
GETTING OVER YOURSELF FOR A SECOND?
THERE'S NO "US."
LOOK, ANGEL, I'M SORRY
IF I WAS SUPPOSED TO SPEND THE SUMMER MOONING OVER YOU,
BUT I DIDN'T.
I MOVED ON.
TO THE LIVING.
HEY.
HEY! HEY.
WHAT'S WRONG WITH ANGEL?
BEATS ME.
LET'S DANCE.
O...K.
[SLOW MUSIC PLAYING]
XANDER...
DID I EVER THANK YOU FOR SAVING MY LIFE?
NO.
DON'T YOU WISH I WOULD?
BUFFY?
YOU'RE REALLY CAMPAIGNING FOR BITCH OF THE YEAR, AREN'T YOU?
AS DEFENDING CHAMPION, ARE YOU NERVOUS?
I CAN HOLD MY OWN.
YOU KNOW, WE'VE NEVER REALLY BEEN CLOSE,
WHICH IS NICE, 'CAUSE I DON'T REALLY LIKE YOU THAT MUCH, BUT...
YOU HAVE, ON OCCASION, SAVED THE WORLD AND STUFF,
SO I'M GONNA DO YOU A FAVOR.
AND THIS GREAT FAVOR IS...
I'M GONNA GIVE YOU SOME ADVICE.
GET OVER IT.
EXCUSE ME?
WHATEVER IS CAUSING THE JOAN COLLINS 'TUDE,
DEAL WITH IT.
EMBRACE THE PAIN, SPANK YOUR INNER MOPPET, WHATEVER,
BUT GET OVER IT.
'CAUSE PRETTY SOON,
YOU'RE NOT GONNA EVEN HAVE THE LOSER FRIENDS YOU'VE GOT NOW.
I THINK IT'S ABOUT TIME YOU START MINDING YOUR OWN BUSINESS.
IT'S LONG PAST.
NIGHTY-NIGHT.
I'LL JUST SEE IF ANGEL FEELS LIKE DANCING.
OH!
MS--MS. CALENDAR?
OH, GOD! MS. CALENDAR?
Willow: SHE'S POSSESSED!
Giles: POSSESSED?
THAT'S THE ONLY EXPLANATION THAT MAKES ANY SENSE.
I MEAN, YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN HER LAST NIGHT.
THAT WASN'T BUFFY.
ARE WE OVERLOOKING THE IDEA
THAT SHE MAY BE VERY ATTRACTED TO ME?
SHE'S POSSESSED.
POSSESSED BY WHAT?
A...POSSESSING THING.
WELL, THAT NARROWS IT DOWN.
Xander: WELL, YOU'RE THE EXPERT.
HEY, MAYBE WHEN THE MASTER KILLED HER,
SOME MYSTICAL, BAD-GUY TRANSFERENCE THING HAPPENED.
THAT'S WHAT IT WAS.
I MEAN, WHY ELSE WOULD SHE BE ACTING LIKE SUCH A B-I-T-C-H?
WILLOW, I THINK WE'RE ALL A LITTLE TOO OLD TO BE SPELLING THINGS OUT.
A BITKA?
YES. I SUGGEST THAT, UH,
THE EXPLANATION FOR HER BEHAVIOR MAY BE SOMETHING,
WELL, MORE MUNDANE.
[BELL RINGS]
SHE MAY SIMPLY HAVE WHAT YOU AMERICANS REFER TO AS "ISSUES."
HER EXPERIENCE WITH THE MASTER
MUST HAVE BEEN EXTREMELY TRAUMATIC.
WELL, SHE WAS, FOR AT LEAST A FEW MINUTES, TECHNICALLY DEAD.
I DON'T THINK SHE'S DEALT WITH THAT ON A CONSCIOUS LEVEL.
SHE'S CONVINCED HERSELF THAT SHE'S INVULNERABLE
FOR THE VERY REASON--
THAT'S A VERY INTERESTING POINT ABOUT TROUT...
YOU JUST BROUGHT UP NOW.
TROUT?
TROUT! YES, UH, TROUT IS--IS A FISH.
GOOD MORNING. DID YOU SLEEP WELL?
LIKE A ROCK.
THE MASTER'S GONE.
I'M SORRY?
THE MASTER. I WENT BY HIS GRAVE LAST NIGHT,
AND THEY HAVE A VACANCY.
GOOD GOD.
WHAT WOULD SOMEBODY WANT WITH MASTER BONES?
A TROPHY? A HORRIBLE CONVERSATION PIECE?
THEY'RE GONNA BRING HIM BACK.
THEY'RE GONNA BRING THE MASTER BACK TO LIFE,
AND I SEEM TO RECALL YOU TELLING ME HE WAS HISTORY.
BUFFY, I'VE NEVER HEARD
OF A REVIVIFICATION RITUAL BEING SUCCESSFUL.
BUT YOU'VE HEARD OF THEM?! THANKS FOR THE WARNING.
WELL, BUFFY, GILES DID BURY HIM--
LOOK, THIS IS SLAYER STUFF, OK?!
COULD WE JUST HAVE JUST A LITTLE LESS FROM THE CIVILIANS, PLEASE?
OK, THAT'S JUST ABOUT ENOUGH!
Mr. Snyder: I BELIEVE SOME US HAVE CLASS?
AND SOME OF US HAVE JOBS.
YES, WELL,
I'LL SEE YOU ALL IN THE LIBRARY LATER.
WE'LL CONTINUE WITH THIS DISCUSSION.
ABOUT TROUT.
THERE'S SOME THINGS I CAN JUST SMELL.
IT'S LIKE A SIXTH SENSE.
WELL, ACTUALLY, THAT WOULD BE ONE OF THE 5.
THAT SUMMERS GIRL-- I SMELL TROUBLE.
I SMELL EXPULSION AND JUST THE FAINTEST AROMA OF JAIL.
WELL, BEFORE YOU THROW AWAY THE KEY,
YOU MIGHT CONSIDER GIVING HER THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT.
SHE MAY SURPRISE YOU.
YOU REALLY HAVE FAITH IN THOSE KIDS, DON'T YOU?
YES, I DO.
WEIRD.
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT. I'VE GOT SOMETHING.
IT'S LATIN, SO BEAR WITH ME.
UM, TO REVIVE THE VAMPIRE, THEY NEED HIS BONES--UH...
WHICH THEY HAVE--AND, UM, THE BLOOD--
THIS IS VERY UNCLEAR--
OF THE CLOSEST PERSON--
UH, SOMEONE CONNECTED TO THE VAMPIRE.
THAT WOULD BE ME.
PERHAPS.
WE WERE CLOSE.
WE KILLED EACH OTHER.
IT REALLY... PROMOTES TOGETHERNESS.
WELL, IS THERE ANYTHING ON WHEN THE CEREMONY--
Buffy: THIS IS CORDELIA'S.
"COME TO THE BRONZE BEFORE IT OPENS,
OR WE MAKE HER A MEAL."
THEY'RE GONNA COOK HER DINNER?
UH, PRETEND I DIDN'T SAY THAT.
WHAT DO WE DO?
I GO TO THE BRONZE AND SAVE THE DAY.
I DON'T LIKE THIS. NOR I.
YEAH? WELL, YOU GUYS AREN'T GOING.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
I CAN'T DO IT ANYMORE!
I CAN'T LOOK AFTER THE 3 OF YOU GUYS WHILE I'M FIGHTING.
WELL, WHAT ABOUT THE REST OF THE NOTE?
THE PART THAT SAYS, "P.S.: THIS IS A TRAP"?
YOU'LL BE PLAYING STRAIGHT INTO THEIR HANDS.
I CAN HANDLE THIS.
STOP SAYING THAT!
GOD! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?
CORDELIA MAY BE DEAD.
THIS IS MY FIGHT.
YOU KNOW, BEING STALKED ISN'T REALLY A BIG TURN-ON FOR GIRLS.
YOU NEED HELP,
SOMEONE TO WATCH YOUR BACK.
ARE YOU SURE YOU DON'T MEAN MY NECK?
WHY ARE YOU RIDING ME?
BECAUSE I DON'T TRUST YOU.
YOU'RE A VAMPIRE.
OH, I'M SORRY.
IS THAT AN OFFENSIVE TERM?
SHOULD I SAY "UNDEAD-AMERICAN"?
YOU HAVE TO TRUST SOMEONE.
YOU CAN'T DO THIS ALONE.
I TRUST ME.
YOU'RE NOT AS STRONG AS YOU THINK.
YOU THINK YOU CAN TAKE ME?
WHAT?
OH, COME ON.
I MEAN, YOU MUST'VE THOUGHT ABOUT IT.
WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF IT EVER CAME DOWN TO A FIGHT--
YOU, VAMPIRE, ME, THE SLAYER--
I MEAN, YOU MUST'VE WONDERED.
WELL, WHY DON'T WE FIND OUT?
I'M NOT GOING TO FIGHT YOU.
COME ON.
KICK MY ASS.
DON'T YOU HAVE SOMEWHERE TO BE?
I DO.
WELL, YOU'RE WASTING TIME.
JUST STAY OUT OF MY WAY.
HAPPY TO OBLIGE.
[GIRL SOBBING]
THAT'S NOT CORDELIA.
[LAUGHING]
CORDELIA COULDN'T MAKE IT.
WHERE IS SHE?
I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO TELL.
I DON'T LIKE THIS.
DON'T LIKE WHAT?
THERE'S THE BAIT.
WHERE'S THE HOOK?
YOU'RE RIGHT.
WHY WOULD THEY SEND JUST ONE?
I STILL THINK WE SHOULD HAVE GONE WITH HER.
IF BUFFY'S ABOUT TO LOSE IT,
I THINK WE SHOULD BE TRYING TO REACH MINIMUM SAFE DISTANCE.
XANDER, YOU KNOW IT'S A TRAP.
Giles: AH. AHH!
THE LATIN IS TRANSLATED FROM THE SUMERIAN...
AND RATHER BADLY.
CLOSEST TO THE MASTER ACTUALLY TRANSLATES AS NEAREST--
PHYSICALLY.
"THE PERSON OR PERSONS WHO WERE WITH HIM...
WHEN..."
IT IS A TRAP.
IT JUST ISN'T FOR HER.
WATCH HER.
DON'T KILL HER UNLESS YOU HAVE TO.
BUFFY, WHAT'S GOING ON?
I'LL BE BACK.
XANDER!
WHAT HAPPENED?
VAMPIRES.
THE ONES YOU COULD HANDLE YOURSELF.
WHERE ARE THE OTHERS?
I DON'T KNOW.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOUR PROBLEM IS,
WHAT YOUR ISSUES ARE,
BUT AS OF NOW, I OFFICIALLY DON'T CARE.
IF YOU'D WORKED WITH US FOR 5 SECONDS,
YOU COULD'VE STOPPED THIS.
WE JUST HAVE TO THINK.
WHERE WOULD THEY HAVE TAKEN THEM?
IF THEY HURT WILLOW, I'LL KILL YOU.
WHY DID THEY TAKE THEM AND NOT YOU?
GILES SAID THE RITUAL WAS, UM...
THEY NEEDED PEOPLE WHO WERE CLOSE TO THE MASTER,
PHYSICALLY CLOSE. WHEN HE...
THE ONES WHO WERE WITH THE MASTER WHEN HE DIED.
GILES...
WILLOW... CORDELIA...
AND MS. CALENDAR.
ODDS ARE THEY GOT A COMPLETE SET BY NOW.
WE NEED TO FIND OUT WHERE.
HOW?
ONE MORE TIME.
WHERE ARE THEY?
YOU'RE TOO LATE.
YOUR FRIENDS ARE DEAD.
TELL ME WHERE THEY ARE.
WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO,
KILL ME?
HA HA HA!
AS A MATTER OF FACT...
YES.
BUT SINCE I'M NOT GOING TO KILL YOU ANYTIME SOON,
THE QUESTION BECOMES
HOW ARE WE GOING TO PASS THE TIME TILL THEN?
SO...
ONE MORE TIME.
BEGIN.
BEHOLD, THESE FOUR MORTALS.
WITNESSES TO OUR MASTER'S WRETCHED DEMISE.
THEY WILL BREATHE THEIR LAST THIS NIGHT.
THE BLOOD THAT POURS FROM THEIR THROATS
WILL BRING NEW LIFE TO THE OLD ONE.
GATHER FOR HIS RESURRECTION,
FOR THE DAWN OF THIS NEW END.
Xander, whispering: BUFFY.
BUFFY!
WE GOT TO DO SOMETHING NOW.
YOU TWO GET THE OTHERS OUT OF HERE.
WE NEED YOU TO DISTRACT THE VAMPIRES.
RIGHT.
WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?
I'M GOING TO KILL THEM ALL.
THAT OUGHT TO DISTRACT THEM.
FOR THE OLD ONE...
FOR HIS PAIN.
FOR THE DARK.
FOR THE--AAGGH!
AAH!
THE SACRIFICES!
STOP THEM!
[SHOUTING]
HYAH!
AAH!
[SHOUTING]
ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
YEAH, I'M OK.
WHERE'S BUFFY?
SHE'S WORKING OUT HER ISSUES.
AAH!
ENOUGH!
YOUR DAY IS DONE, GIRL.
I'LL GRIND YOU INTO A STICKY PASTE
AND HEAR YOU BEG BEFORE I SMASH IN YOUR FACE.
SO ARE YOU GOING TO KILL ME,
OR ARE WE JUST MAKING SMALL TALK?
AAH!
AAH! AAH!
AAH!
IT'S OVER.
NO, IT'S NOT.
IT'S OK.
[CRYING]
Cordelia: WHAT AN ORDEAL.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT THE WORST PART IS?
IT STAYS WITH YOU FOREVER.
NO MATTER WHAT THEY TELL YOU,
NONE OF THAT RUST AND BLOOD
AND GRIME COMES OUT.
I MEAN, YOU CAN DRY CLEAN TILL JUDGMENT DAY,
YOU'RE LIVING WITH THOSE STAINS.
YEAH, THAT'S THE WORST PART OF BEING HUNG UPSIDE DOWN
BY A VAMPIRE WHO WANTS TO SLIT YOUR THROAT:
THE STAINS.
I HEAR YA.
Buffy: I DON'T THINK I CAN FACE THEM.
OF COURSE YOU CAN.
I CAN'T.
WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO SAY?
"SORRY I ALMOST GOT YOUR THROATS SLIT.
WHAT'S THE HOMEWORK?"
PUNISHING YOURSELF LIKE THIS IS POINTLESS.
IT'S ENTIRELY POINTY.
I WAS A MORON.
I PUT MY BEST FRIENDS IN MORTAL DANGER
ON THE SECOND DAY OF SCHOOL.
WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO,
CRAWL INSIDE A CAVE FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE?
WOULD IT HAVE CABLE?
BUFFY, YOU ACTED WRONGLY, I ADMIT THAT, BUT BELIEVE ME,
THAT WAS HARDLY THE WORST MISTAKE YOU'LL EVER MAKE.
THAT WASN'T QUITE AS COMFORTING AS IT WAS MEANT TO BE.
WELL, POINTS FOR EFFORT.
[BELL RINGS]
I'LL SEE YA.
HEY, BUFFY.
HEY.
WE SAVED YOU A SEAT.
THERE'S A RUMOR GOING AROUND THAT, UH,
MR. COX IS THE MOST BORING TEACHER IN THE ENTIRE WORLD.
LIKE, I THINK HE WON A BELT OR SOMETHING.
LIKE, YES.
WELL, I HEAR HE NODS OFF A LOT,
SO THAT'S A PLUS.
SO ARE WE BRONZING IT TONIGHT?
WEDNESDAY...
IT'S KIND OF BEAT.
WELL, WE COULD GRIND OUR ENEMIES INTO TALCUM POWDER
WITH A SLEDGEHAMMER, BUT, GOSH, WE DID THAT LAST NIGHT.
Xander: HEY, I GOT A PLAN. HOW ABOUT MINATURE GOLF?
Willow: THERE'S NO COURSE HERE.
OKAY, MINATURE TENNIS.
[TALKING SOFTLY]
I HATE THAT GIRL.
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
GRR! ARGH!