Phone's for you.
I didn't hear it.
I was on another call.
I think it's Harvey.
Why didn't you say so? Scat!
I hate when she says that.
Hello?
Hey, Sabrina.
Hi, Harvey.
Got a question.
Sure, ask away.
What pages are we suppose to read for Mr. Pool's class?
Um, just the chapter on digestion
up to the large intestine.
Is that it?
No. Actually, I'm not calling about homework.
That was just an excuse.
It was? For what?
I really called to say
Sabrina, I think you're the prettiest girl in school.
You do?
Yeah. And there's something else I want to tell you.
What?!
I like squid.
I like it a lot!
Squid rocks!
Who is this?
It's Harvey.
[ Giggling]
Salem!
Oh-oh.
You are so neutered.
[ Screaming]
And if the soccer team wins again tomorrow
we go to the playoffs.
Uh-huh.
Sabrina, did you hear what I said?
Sure. You were saying... Something about... something?
You're not paying attention.
You keep looking around.
I was sort of expecting Harvey to show up.
So, uh, what were you saying about... school?
I wasn't talking about school.
I was saying that if the soccer team...
Wait. Harvey's here.
Pretend like we're talking.
We aretalking.
Hi, guys.
Hi, Harvey. Hi, Harvey.
Sabrina, would you be up for a game of foosball?
Oh, actually, I was just talking to Emma.
That's okay. You go and play.
I'll finish my story later.
Good, because I really want to hear the end of it.
And... the beginning.
Okay.
Let's foos. All right.
I lead, 42 to 38.
Yeah. But you're going down today.
Ball up.
Spin, spin.
You're on the ropes.
Hey, Harvey.
Hi, Libby.
Goal!
What?
Goal.
Hey.
Oh, hi, Sabrina.
Oh, Harvey called for you about an hour ago.
No, he didn't.
I was just with him.
[ Giggling]
Why do I never tire of it?
So, you were out with Harvey.
The two of you have a date?
No. We were just playing foosball.
Harvey's too oblivious to ask me out on a date.
I wish it was someway I could get Harvey to notice me more.
Well, the best way to get someone's attention
is to be an interesting person.
Gee, let me think.
What would make me more interesting?
I know. What if I had
supernatural powers
and could blow stuff up?
Careful. Little close.
Sabrina, that is not the way to get
Harvey's attention.
I know
but it made me feel better.
Look, if you want him to notice you
don't be so available.
Get a hobby or a job.
When I was a girl, I kept bees.
I think I'll get a job.
What kind of job are you looking for?
Oh, just something to keep me busy
on Friday nights.
Yeah, I don't have a boyfriend either.
Hey, look. "Auditions today
for a lovely magician's assistant."
That's perfect for me.
Conceited.
I'm here for the lovely
magician's assistant job.
You're really not qualified.
Aren't I lovely?
Well, yes, Justin, you are
but you're not a girl.
The sign didn't say
anything about being a girl.
Would you be willing to wear sequins?
Sure.
Slit up to here?
No problem.
Yeah, well, you're too tall.
Next.
I'll wear flats.
Next.
He'll love you, shorty.
Um, I'm here for the magician's assistant job.
I'm Sabrina spellman.
I know, we're in English class together.
We are?
Yeah, I sit three chairs behind you.
Remember, one day, you dropped your pen
and I picked it up and you said, "thanks a lot."
Yeah, and then you said, "you're welcome."
Right.
Well, you seem qualified.
You're lovely.
Not too tall.
Now, do you have
any experience with magic?
A little.
Um, I prepared a trick.
Well, you're mostly there for misdirection, but go ahead.
Abracadabra.
That's like Vegas magic!
You've got the job!
Cool.
Hey.
You heading over to the slicery?
I can't.
I have rehearsal.
Rehearsal?
Are you in a play?
No. I got a job as the lovely assistant
in a professional magic act.
Hey, Sabrina.
I heard you joined magic Joel's freak show.
It's his "world of wonder."
Harvey, I'm heading over to the slicery.
See you there?
Sure.
You coming?
Didn't you hear what I said?
I can't.
This is where the magic happens.
And the laundry.
Want to see me saw my dog in half?
Your dog?
I had to practice on something before you came along.
How did you get into magic anyway?
The truth is, I thought it
would make girls like me.
And did it?
See, that's the tragedy.
Girls hate magic.
But I still do it
because magic makes me feel special
but I guess you wouldn't understand that.
Actually, I would.
If only magic were real.
Okay. Let's start.
The first illusion you will learn is...
The "assistant's revenge."
Wow. My magic never involved such large props.
You're not a professional.
Okay.
Now, before I show it to you
you must swear never to reveal the amazing
and mystifying secrets of magic.
I swear I will never tell.
The amazing and...
And mystifying secrets of magic. Right.
So, uh, how does it work?
Step in.
Now, I buckle the buckles and lock the stocks...
Are you almost done?
You know
my dog never complained.
Now, I close the curtain and I walk around the back
and presto-change-o.
Ow, my foot!
Oh, sorry.
Now say, "isn't he amazing?"
Isn't he amazing?
Thanks. Now, close the curtain again.
Open it again.
Hey, where did you go?
I disappeared!
Amazing.
It's our big finale.
Now, let's talk wardrobe.
I'm thinking a velour pantsuit
with a plunging neckline.
What will you wear?
You didn't have to walk me home.
Well, after rehearsal
I always had to walk my dog too.
Well, I'll see you.
But before I go...
Isn't he amazing?
For you.
Thanks.
See you tomorrow.
Oop, watch me disappear.
Who was that?
Joel.
He seems like a nice boy.
Yeah. Did Harvey call?
I don't think so, but check with the cat.
Oh, I shouldn't have.
Pick a card, any card
and I will amaze and astound you.
You mean bother and bore me.
Hi, Harvey.
Can I sit with you?
What's wrong with your table?
It's too close to magic Joel's.
I can't believe you're working with him.
You're working with Joel?
I told you, I'm his lovely assistant.
You never pay any attention.
Yes. I do.
You got pudding right there.
[ Laughing]
I hope this tie isn't valuable.
Well, it's my favorite tie, but...
What are you doing?
Magic, Mr. Pool.
Magic to amaze and astound you.
Presto-change-o.
Huh, how'd you do that?
I think you made it cleaner.
Mr. Pool, I'm going to make you an offer
that you can't refuse.
So, Claire comes over... You know Claire?
No.
Well, she had the best story about Alice... you know Alice?
No.
I'm telling the story anyway. See, Claire...
Sabrina, Sabrina, I got great news.
Excuse me. Business.
Thanks to Mr. Pool
we've got our first big gig
tomorrow, here in the cafeteria.
All right! The cafeteria?
Yeah.
Do I have to wear a hairnet?
Tomorrow evening, then.
That sounds great.
Okay. Bye.
Who was that?
What's going on?
I could only hear
your side of the conversation.
That was my old college buddy.
Galileo?
No. Ethan boddicker.
He's coming over tomorrow night for dinner.
Ooh, Zelda, you have a date.
It's not a date.
It's dinner with a colleague.
And you're welcome to join us.
I'd rather die... but thanks.
[ Theme music]
♪ Ta-da.
What do you think?
Do I look more interesting?
You look like some cheesy magician's assistant.
His name is Joel
and when we perform in the cafeteria tomorrow
all eyes will be on us
and Harvey will have to notice me.
What is Sabrina doing up there?
Since when did she join a magic act?
Behold... the linking rings are unlinked.
[ Laughing]
Unlinked...
Still linked.
Isn't he amazing?
Amazingly lame.
Shh!
I can't take the pressure.
You can do this, Joel.
Move on to the tie trick.
Sir, may I have your tie
so that I could perform a trick
that will amaze and astound you?
Why, of course.
I love this trick.
Now, I hope this tie isn't valuable.
[ Chuckles]
Crazy.
Uh-oh.
"Uh-oh"?
You mean, "presto."
No, I messed up.
I cut the wrong part.
You ruined my tie?
Grandpa's tie?
Isn't he amazing?
No.
Let's go to the big finish.
Good idea.
And now, ladies and gentlemen
for the big finale
I will make my lovely assistant disappear.
You know, Sabrina really found the perfect boyfriend.
She and Joel are going out?
That's what I heard.
All right.
As you can see, she cannot escape.
Now... presto-change-o...
♪ Ta-da.
Leave him there.
Now, magic Joel will disappear.
No. Wait.
My pants are stuck.
What do you mean?
Oh, I blew the trick.
We'll make it work.
No, don't.
See? Magic Joel has disappeared.
Wow!
How'd they do that?
Magic, I guess.
Show's over.
Joel?
Joel, where are you?
I'm right here.
Where?
In the stocks.
What am I, invisible?
Ow! My eye!
Joel: You mean, I'm actually invisible?
I don't know how.
I do.
All my hard work paid off.
My magic isreal.
It's real all right.
Okay, now, we have to change you back.
Why?
This is great.
I can go anywhere.
I can do anything.
I ammagic Joel.
Joel? Joel? Joel?
Where'd he go?
Joel?
Sabrina.
Hi, Harvey.
I saw the show and I have a question.
I can't tell you how the tricks are done.
No.
I just wanted to know if it was true
that you and Joel are going out.
Joel: Yes.no.
Did someone say "yes"?
Joel: Yes.no.
Uh, I'm practicing my ventriloquism for the act.
But we'll talk later.
Right now, I've got to, um...
Go into Mr. Pool's room.
I'm also doing mime.
How dare you?
You have no right telling Harvey
we're boyfriend and girlfriend.
Joel: Why not?
Because we're not.
I gave you a flower and you took it.
That doesn't mean anything.
Maybe not to you, but it does to me.
Look, Joel, we have a business relationship
and that's it.
Harvey doesn't even notice you.
I would worship you.
You'd be my everything.
I don't want to be your everything.
Sabrina, what are you doing in my classroom?
I... came to ask you a question.
Ask away as I staple my tie back together.
Okay, I wanted to know if you enjoyed the magic show.
Uh, not really.
Joel ruined my favorite tie.
There's really something not right about that boy.
What was that?
A gust of wind?
In this windowless prison cell?
Anyway, you know...
I thought you were really polished.
My advice: Lose Joel. You don't need him.
Mr. Pool! Sabrina!
Don't be so harsh.
This magic thing is alot harder than it looks.
Well, I better get going.
Come on.
Grandpa?
Yello.
Aunt hilda, you have to help me. I turned Joel invisible.
Calm down, you just need to give him a shot of visibility powder.
It's right here in the cabinet.
Can you bring it to me?
You still don't get this witch thing, do you?
Are you alone?
Pretty much.
Got it.
Just spray some in his face, and he'll be fine.
See? No problem.
No problem, except now I have to find him.
Let's see... A 16-year-old invisible boy
loose in a high school.
Where would he go?
Oh, no.
Keep your shirts on!
Don't change.
I smell smoke.
Run!
Panic! Don't inhale!
Joel: Mean.
I knew you'd be here.
Look, Joel, we need to talk.
Did you come to tell me you changed your mind?
No.
Uh, what are you doing with that talcum powder?
Thought you might be chafing.
I know you probably don't see much in me now
but you will.
I'll make you notice me, Sabrina.
You wait and see.
Ethan, I'm so glad you came.
Zelda, you look great.
You never seem to age.
Well, let's not talk about me.
Let's talk about the search for monopoles.
Ah, you read my last paper.
I couldn't put it down.
Oh, Zelda...
I'm late for my tea at the Harvard club.
Are you Ethan?
Yes.
Oh, my god.
Excuse me.
What's going on?
It's stuck.
Why didn't you tell me Ethan was cute?
I don't think about how he looks.
I think about how he thinks.
I think he's cute.
Weren't you going to Harvard for some tea?
No, stupid.
I was making fun of you.
[ Grunts]
But now I'm staying here.
How's my hair?
You have brain-head.
Where have you been?
Looking for Joel.
I haven't seen him.
Me neither.
Hi, Sabrina.
Can I sit here?
Sure.
I want to hear more
about ventriloquism.
You talk with your stomach, right?
Joel: Harvey's a loser.
Who said that?
Uh... my stomach's grumbling.
Ow.
That's it.
Where are you?!
When I get my hands on you...
Sabrina...
Got to go.
But you have to factor in
quarks remain forever trapped in the particles they create.
I know the feeling.
Yes, but nowadays, all physics is sub-atomic physics.
Between the bosons
and the leptons and the quarks...
Since you took a breath
I thought I'd jump in with a new topic.
What's your favorite Bruce Willis movie?
I don't know... Die hard.
1, 2 or 3?
Weren't they not the same?
No, actually two is very different.
Hilda, sister, dear
why don't you make like an atom and split.
Fine.
I can take a hint.
I'll leave you two alone
to discuss your little quirks.
That's quarks.
I meant quirks.
Don't talk. Bad night.
Know the feeling.
Thank goodness that she left.
Now we can talk about the first millisecond
after the big bang. See, I think...
Love me!
What?
I'm sorry.
It's just that...
We finally get rid of your weird sister
and all you can talk about is the big bang?
I came here tonight
hoping for more than science.
I wanted you to look into my eyes
and see something other than rods and cones.
I love you, Zelda.
Don't you realize that?
You never said anything.
I've been playing footsie with you all night.
That was you?
I thought it was the cat.
What's the point?
This is too humiliating.
I can't let him go.
Slippery floor!
Are you okay?
What happened?
Slippery floor.
[ Doorbell rings]I'll get it.
What are you doing down there?
Both: Slippery floor.
And now we're going back into the dining room.
It's, um, time for dessert.
Dessert?
Yes, dessert.
Oh, good, I like dessert.
Salem: Animals.
Hello. Who are you?
I'm Harvey. Is Sabrina here?
Oh, come in.
So you're Harvey.
Salem, go get Sabrina.
Why do I have to be the one?
I have a few questions.
Hey, Sabrina
guess who's here.
Very funny.
No, really. Harvey's here.
Harvey's here?
Hi, Harvey.
Hi, Sabrina.
I'll leave you two alone.
Take the cat.
[ Harvey meows ]
So, uh, what are you doing here?
I was worried about you.
I noticed you sort of lost it at the slicery.
You noticed?
Yeah, and I wondered if you were mad at me.
No, I'm not mad.
Good, 'cause I was thinking maybe...
[ Mumbles]
What?
Don't make me say it again.
I swear I didn't hear you.
Do you want to go out with me?
Like on a date?
Like a real date?
I'd love that.
Yeah. Uh, when?
Now? let's go.
Wait.
I should change first.
Hang here. I'll be right back.
Actually, I'm wait in my car.
I'm afraid your aunt'll keep asking me questions.
Meet you out front.
Oh...
Joel: Hi, Sabrina.
Joel?
I totally forgot about you.
How did you get here?
I came in with Harvey.
Did you notice he noticed me?
Yeah. So I guess i'm out of the running.
Joel, you never were...
Yeah, you're out of the running.
I wish you'd like me, Sabrina.
I do, Joel.
Just not in the way you want me to.
But I like talking magic with you.
You do?
Yeah.
Look, are you anywhere near my face?
Actually, I'm at the piano.
I didn't know you liked piano.
I thought it'd make girls like me.
And did it?
No.
Girls like guitars.
Hey, uh, wait here. Play.
I got to grab something in the kitchen.
Wow. You're good.
You think?
Yeah.
[ Coughing]
What are you doing?
I'm undoing.
And you know, Joel
someday some girl will appreciate
all your hard work.
Maybe not in high school
but I'm sure by late college.
Well, I better get going.
So, I guess this is it.
I guess.
No, wait, we have English class together.
Oh, right. So I'll see you tomorrow.
Yeah. See you.
What's going on?
Who are you?
I'm Joel.
You can see me?
Yes... and you're not wearing
any pants.
Joel!
What are you doing in here?
You can see me?
No, you're invisible.
I am?
No! Get out
or I'll telling coach saffo.
Man, I thought for sure I'd done it right.
I was magic Joel once
and I will be again.
Get out!
I hate magic.
Hello?
Oh, hi, Ethan.
Well, you're welcome.
Oh... well, yes.
Well, any time.
I'd like that.
What are you doing now?
Oh, you're at home.
You're eating a can of tuna.
Salem, I can't believe you tricked me!
Ooh!
Zelda? Zelda?
What's her problem?