1 00:00:00,968 --> 00:00:03,303 Elon Musk sent out a message 2 00:00:03,403 --> 00:00:06,139 saying to Vladimir Putin he would fight him man-- 3 00:00:06,240 --> 00:00:08,609 mano a mano to determine, like, 4 00:00:08,709 --> 00:00:09,710 what happens in Ukraine. He's like, 5 00:00:09,810 --> 00:00:12,045 "No war. Just me versus you." 6 00:00:12,145 --> 00:00:13,547 Which I think we should actually go back to. 7 00:00:13,647 --> 00:00:15,048 I think we need to stop these wars. 8 00:00:15,148 --> 00:00:17,017 Just send your best fighter and we sort this thing out. 9 00:00:17,117 --> 00:00:18,619 However, I will say this, 10 00:00:18,719 --> 00:00:20,187 if I am putting my life in somebody's hands, 11 00:00:20,287 --> 00:00:22,623 I'm not choosing Elon Musk. All right? 12 00:00:22,723 --> 00:00:25,092 If I'm choosing-- if I'm gonna choose a billionaire to fight, 13 00:00:25,192 --> 00:00:27,461 like, I'm going Bezos first. And I mean buff Bezos. 14 00:00:27,561 --> 00:00:30,297 Not, like, the garage Bezos. I mean, like, like, the guy now, 15 00:00:30,397 --> 00:00:31,965 you know what I mean-- Where it looks like he puts his money 16 00:00:32,065 --> 00:00:34,601 in his muscles. that Bezos. 17 00:00:34,701 --> 00:00:37,204 But Elon Musk... yeah. 18 00:00:37,304 --> 00:00:39,006 It's also crazy that he just offered this himself. 19 00:00:39,106 --> 00:00:41,041 "I will fight you for the future of Ukraine." 20 00:00:41,141 --> 00:00:42,676 Ukraine is like, "I'm sorry, come again?" 21 00:00:42,776 --> 00:00:45,145 -♪ ♪ -ANNOUNCER: Coming to you from the heart of Times Square 22 00:00:45,245 --> 00:00:48,215 in New York City, the only city in America, 23 00:00:48,315 --> 00:00:50,617 it's The Daily Show. 24 00:00:50,717 --> 00:00:53,854 Tonight, Brady is back. 25 00:00:53,954 --> 00:00:56,323 Putin bans Instagram. 26 00:00:56,423 --> 00:00:59,226 And Evan Rachel Wood. 27 00:00:59,326 --> 00:01:03,297 This is The Daily Show with Trevor Noah. 28 00:01:04,131 --> 00:01:05,499 Hey, what's going on, everybody? 29 00:01:05,599 --> 00:01:07,434 Welcome to The Daily Show. I'm Trevor Noah, 30 00:01:07,534 --> 00:01:09,970 and joining me for today's headlines is the one and only 31 00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:12,639 -Michael Kosta! How you doing, Kosta? -Oh, man. 32 00:01:12,739 --> 00:01:15,275 I'm tired. I mean, I woke up at... 4:00, 33 00:01:15,375 --> 00:01:19,313 but it was really... 8:15 or... (stammers) or was it... 34 00:01:19,413 --> 00:01:23,116 I woke up at 8:15, but it was actually 4:00-- my... (sighs) 35 00:01:23,217 --> 00:01:26,086 -Do you get confused by it? -Wh-Wh-- The time thing? 36 00:01:26,153 --> 00:01:28,555 Was I early today or was I late? 37 00:01:28,655 --> 00:01:30,224 I-- You know what, I don't, I don't know. 38 00:01:30,324 --> 00:01:32,626 Because in South Africa we don't do that, so I don't even know... 39 00:01:32,726 --> 00:01:34,094 -(stammering) -I don't even know it happens sometimes, 40 00:01:34,127 --> 00:01:35,429 because everything changes automatically 41 00:01:35,529 --> 00:01:37,631 -except my microwave. -Right. (stammers) And-and that's 42 00:01:37,731 --> 00:01:39,132 southern hemisphere, so the clocks, 43 00:01:39,233 --> 00:01:41,001 they go the other direction, is that right? 44 00:01:41,101 --> 00:01:43,737 Because I get all screwed up here because it's light outside, 45 00:01:43,837 --> 00:01:47,007 or is it dark? I-I think you should go on with the show, 46 00:01:47,107 --> 00:01:49,743 but this daylight savings thing's really... messes me up. 47 00:01:49,843 --> 00:01:51,778 -Well, that's why you're here, my friend. -Yup. 48 00:01:51,879 --> 00:01:53,714 To add a much needed perspective. 49 00:01:53,814 --> 00:01:56,483 All right. Let's jump straight into today's headlines. 50 00:01:56,583 --> 00:01:59,019 ♪ ♪ 51 00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:02,356 We begin with major news from the world of sports, 52 00:02:02,456 --> 00:02:04,057 involving Tom Brady. 53 00:02:04,124 --> 00:02:06,960 Seven-time Super Bowl Champion and the guy who 54 00:02:07,060 --> 00:02:08,962 taught Gronk how to read. 55 00:02:09,062 --> 00:02:12,299 Six weeks ago, Brady retired from professional football-- 56 00:02:12,399 --> 00:02:15,736 which was a huge deal, because Because Brady is arguably 57 00:02:15,836 --> 00:02:17,838 the greatest quarterback of all time, okay? 58 00:02:17,938 --> 00:02:21,241 He's played for 22 seasons and he's been going to Super Bowls 59 00:02:21,341 --> 00:02:23,877 so long his first halftime show was a bunch of 60 00:02:23,977 --> 00:02:26,547 Gregorian monks chanting. So, yeah. 61 00:02:26,647 --> 00:02:28,549 It was big news when Tom Brady retired. 62 00:02:28,649 --> 00:02:32,619 But you know what's even bigger news than retiring? Uretiring. 63 00:02:32,719 --> 00:02:34,955 Let's move to a headline that everybody's talking about 64 00:02:35,088 --> 00:02:38,559 this morning. A surprise twist in the retirement of Tom Brady. 65 00:02:38,659 --> 00:02:41,094 Yeah, turns out, uh, it wasn't much of a retirement after all. 66 00:02:41,128 --> 00:02:44,731 -(laughter) -The NFL great announcing he is going to be 67 00:02:44,831 --> 00:02:47,668 back with his Tampa Bay Buccaneers for the 2022 season, 68 00:02:47,768 --> 00:02:51,004 citing, "unfinished business." 69 00:02:51,104 --> 00:02:54,308 NEWSWOMAN: In his announcement on social media, he says this, 70 00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:03,817 Yes! Tom Brady is back in the NFL! 71 00:03:03,917 --> 00:03:06,420 Oh, I love this so much! I love it so much! 72 00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:09,189 Because he is the most loved and the most hated athlete 73 00:03:09,289 --> 00:03:12,125 in the game. I love this guy! He's the main character! 74 00:03:12,226 --> 00:03:13,927 What's the NFL without Tom Brady? Huh? 75 00:03:14,061 --> 00:03:16,797 Him leaving the NFL is like when Charlie Sheen 76 00:03:16,897 --> 00:03:18,532 left Two and a Half Men. Yeah, there were still 77 00:03:18,632 --> 00:03:20,200 two-and-a-half men, but which men? 78 00:03:20,300 --> 00:03:22,302 Not men we cared about. Where's the cocaine?! 79 00:03:22,402 --> 00:03:25,105 Step it up, little kid. 80 00:03:25,205 --> 00:03:26,707 And I get why Brady's back. 81 00:03:26,807 --> 00:03:29,076 First of all, you have seen the price of gas right now? 82 00:03:29,109 --> 00:03:30,777 This is not the time to quit your job. 83 00:03:30,878 --> 00:03:33,814 Also, some people are just not made for the retired life, 84 00:03:33,914 --> 00:03:35,315 especially Tom Brady. Think about it. 85 00:03:35,415 --> 00:03:37,084 For 22 years, 86 00:03:37,184 --> 00:03:39,520 he's had men the size of little trucks 87 00:03:39,620 --> 00:03:40,954 trying to tackle him. 88 00:03:41,088 --> 00:03:42,489 That's adrenaline. 89 00:03:42,589 --> 00:03:45,325 Yeah. Can you imagine how boring his homelife is right now? 90 00:03:45,425 --> 00:03:47,995 Even hiring his own commentators probably didn't help. 91 00:03:48,095 --> 00:03:49,897 "Oh, Tom Brady searching under the sink 92 00:03:49,997 --> 00:03:51,532 "for the soap refill. Can he find it? 93 00:03:51,632 --> 00:03:54,668 "He's got it! Tom Brady's got the soap! 94 00:03:54,768 --> 00:03:56,837 He needs to go back to football." 95 00:03:56,937 --> 00:03:59,106 So, of course Tom Brady wasn't gonna retire, man. 96 00:03:59,206 --> 00:04:02,309 He's the GOAT. His grip on the NFL is tighter 97 00:04:02,409 --> 00:04:04,044 than whoever braided Drake's hair. 98 00:04:04,111 --> 00:04:06,046 Yeah, you want to talk about a GOAT? That person's a GOAT. 99 00:04:06,079 --> 00:04:08,282 How the hell did you turn Drake's short hair into braids? 100 00:04:08,382 --> 00:04:09,883 That's witchcraft, that's how. 101 00:04:10,050 --> 00:04:12,085 So, with this move, Tom Brady 102 00:04:12,186 --> 00:04:15,422 has officially, officially, officially confirmed himself 103 00:04:15,522 --> 00:04:17,591 as the greatest of all time. 104 00:04:17,691 --> 00:04:19,893 Because, you see, this move right here 105 00:04:20,060 --> 00:04:21,828 is what all the greatest do. 106 00:04:21,929 --> 00:04:24,164 They retire, and then they come right back. 107 00:04:24,264 --> 00:04:25,866 Yeah. Michael Jordan did it. 108 00:04:25,966 --> 00:04:27,534 Jay-Z did it. 109 00:04:27,634 --> 00:04:30,237 And the greatest of all time, Jesus. 110 00:04:30,337 --> 00:04:33,307 Yeah. That guy retired from life for three days 111 00:04:33,407 --> 00:04:35,976 before he was like, "Nah, the game needs me." 112 00:04:36,076 --> 00:04:38,478 You know what my favorite part of this story actually is? 113 00:04:38,579 --> 00:04:40,514 Is the night before Brady unretired, 114 00:04:40,614 --> 00:04:44,218 there was an auction for the football that Brady used 115 00:04:44,318 --> 00:04:47,087 to throw his final touchdown pass, 116 00:04:47,154 --> 00:04:49,623 and someone paid more than half a million dollars 117 00:04:49,723 --> 00:04:50,958 for that ball. 118 00:04:51,091 --> 00:04:53,493 (chuckles): Yeah. I mean... 119 00:04:53,594 --> 00:04:55,162 If you... If you ask me, I mean, 120 00:04:55,262 --> 00:04:57,164 this actually just makes the football cooler. 121 00:04:57,264 --> 00:04:59,099 You know? 'Cause if I was at somebody's house 122 00:04:59,199 --> 00:05:00,801 and they were like, "Yo, you want to see the football 123 00:05:00,901 --> 00:05:02,769 from Tom Brady's last touchdown throw?" 124 00:05:02,870 --> 00:05:04,438 I'd be like, "Yeah, maybe. Not really." 125 00:05:04,538 --> 00:05:06,306 But if they were like, "Hey, you want to see 126 00:05:06,406 --> 00:05:08,108 one of the worst purchases ever?" 127 00:05:08,208 --> 00:05:09,543 I'd be like, "Hell, yeah!" 128 00:05:09,643 --> 00:05:11,311 (laughing): "Wait, you're that dumbass? 129 00:05:11,411 --> 00:05:13,847 "You paid... You thought it was his last throw? 130 00:05:13,947 --> 00:05:17,050 You idiot! You dumbass." 131 00:05:17,084 --> 00:05:20,320 Oh, man. Oh, Kosta, what do you think about this story, man? 132 00:05:20,420 --> 00:05:21,788 (sighs) 133 00:05:26,093 --> 00:05:29,930 Look, I-I mean, it seems to me like Tom Brady's acting 134 00:05:30,063 --> 00:05:31,331 like someone who's has been hit in the head 135 00:05:31,431 --> 00:05:33,534 every day for the past 30 years, you know what I mean? 136 00:05:33,634 --> 00:05:36,069 I mean, I feel bad for his kids. 137 00:05:36,136 --> 00:05:38,705 You know? They finally get Dad back in the house, 138 00:05:38,805 --> 00:05:41,875 and after a month, he's like, "I'll do anything. 139 00:05:41,975 --> 00:05:44,678 You know, I'll do anything to get back to work." 140 00:05:44,778 --> 00:05:46,380 I think what he realized, Trevor, 141 00:05:46,480 --> 00:05:49,816 is when you retire, you see and hear 142 00:05:49,917 --> 00:05:52,119 how much people really love and admire you. 143 00:05:52,219 --> 00:05:54,121 -Yeah. -And maybe that was something 144 00:05:54,221 --> 00:05:56,123 that-that compelled him to return. 145 00:05:56,223 --> 00:05:57,958 And, you know, the... 146 00:05:58,091 --> 00:05:59,893 You don't realize how much you're missed until you're gone. 147 00:06:00,027 --> 00:06:01,495 -That's true. That's interesting. -Yeah. 148 00:06:01,595 --> 00:06:04,398 And I think I'm gonna... I'm gonna steal a chapter 149 00:06:04,498 --> 00:06:06,300 from Tom Brady's book, 150 00:06:06,400 --> 00:06:08,135 and I want to announce to you tonight 151 00:06:08,235 --> 00:06:09,736 and to... and to the crew here 152 00:06:09,837 --> 00:06:13,640 that I'm retiring from The Daily Show, okay? 153 00:06:13,740 --> 00:06:16,677 And, uh, now, like Tom Brady, I'll be paying attention 154 00:06:16,777 --> 00:06:20,047 to what you are saying about me once I'm gone, 155 00:06:20,147 --> 00:06:22,382 but I am retiring, okay? 156 00:06:22,482 --> 00:06:25,085 This is my last performance on The Daily Show. 157 00:06:25,185 --> 00:06:27,054 And, uh, thank you, 158 00:06:27,154 --> 00:06:29,523 and feel free to share with others 159 00:06:29,623 --> 00:06:31,258 how you feel about me. 160 00:06:31,358 --> 00:06:33,560 And, uh, you know, thanks a lot. 161 00:06:33,660 --> 00:06:35,729 So, thank you, everybody. 162 00:06:35,829 --> 00:06:37,464 Thank you, guys. Thanks. 163 00:06:37,564 --> 00:06:39,867 Thanks, Trevor. I'm retiring, so this is it. 164 00:06:39,967 --> 00:06:43,403 I'm gone now. I'm retiring from the show. 165 00:06:43,504 --> 00:06:45,506 Not listening, but I am paying attention 166 00:06:45,606 --> 00:06:47,274 to what you're saying. 167 00:06:48,709 --> 00:06:50,077 All right, let's move on 168 00:06:50,110 --> 00:06:51,845 from the greatest quarterback of all time 169 00:06:51,945 --> 00:06:55,182 to the greatest disease of all time, COVID-19. 170 00:06:55,282 --> 00:06:57,551 The virus that goes away then comes back 171 00:06:57,651 --> 00:07:00,053 more times than an evil twin on a soap opera. 172 00:07:00,153 --> 00:07:02,389 More than two years into the pandemic, 173 00:07:02,489 --> 00:07:04,424 several countries in Asia and Europe 174 00:07:04,525 --> 00:07:07,361 are now facing record infection rates. 175 00:07:07,461 --> 00:07:11,031 And things have gotten especially bad in China, 176 00:07:11,131 --> 00:07:13,534 where the government has just imposed lockdowns 177 00:07:13,634 --> 00:07:16,036 on 51 million people. 178 00:07:16,103 --> 00:07:17,804 And for those watching from the United States, 179 00:07:17,905 --> 00:07:19,339 this is a real lockdown, right, 180 00:07:19,439 --> 00:07:20,841 where you can't leave your house, 181 00:07:20,941 --> 00:07:23,043 not an American lockdown where everything is open 182 00:07:23,110 --> 00:07:25,546 but there are stickers on the floor that everyone ignores. 183 00:07:25,646 --> 00:07:27,147 And in most countries, in most countries, 184 00:07:27,247 --> 00:07:29,816 including the U.S., things are going in the other direction. 185 00:07:29,917 --> 00:07:33,153 In fact, restrictions are being lifted so quickly 186 00:07:33,253 --> 00:07:35,489 that things are getting a little confusing, you know? 187 00:07:35,589 --> 00:07:38,392 Like, for example, okay, right here in New York City, 188 00:07:38,492 --> 00:07:40,561 Mayor Eric Adams has lifted the rule 189 00:07:40,661 --> 00:07:42,963 that you have to be vaccinated to attend indoor events. 190 00:07:43,063 --> 00:07:44,331 Okay? That's gone. 191 00:07:44,431 --> 00:07:47,301 But there is still a rule that you have to be vaccinated 192 00:07:47,401 --> 00:07:49,369 to go to your workplace. 193 00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:52,139 So if someone's job is at an indoor event, 194 00:07:52,239 --> 00:07:54,641 they can't go to work. But they can show up to work 195 00:07:54,741 --> 00:07:58,779 to watch their colleagues do their thing. Yeah. 196 00:07:58,879 --> 00:08:01,415 Which is exactly what happened this weekend. 197 00:08:01,515 --> 00:08:03,817 A big matchup at Barclays Center 198 00:08:03,917 --> 00:08:06,019 with the Nets taking on the Knicks, 199 00:08:06,053 --> 00:08:10,457 but Kyrie Irving, who's ineligible to play in the city 200 00:08:10,557 --> 00:08:12,059 for failing to comply with the vaccine mandate 201 00:08:12,159 --> 00:08:14,628 for city workers-- he might have stolen the show. 202 00:08:14,728 --> 00:08:17,598 He attended the game as a fan 203 00:08:17,698 --> 00:08:20,200 and watched his Nets win from the sidelines. 204 00:08:20,300 --> 00:08:22,936 He paid for a ticket just like a regular person. 205 00:08:23,036 --> 00:08:25,806 Yeah, guys, I-I don't care... 206 00:08:25,906 --> 00:08:28,075 like, how COVID compliant you are, 207 00:08:28,175 --> 00:08:29,643 shit like this makes zero sense. 208 00:08:29,743 --> 00:08:31,278 Can we agree on that? Can we agree-- 209 00:08:31,378 --> 00:08:34,248 What, so Kyrie can go inside, not wear a mask, 210 00:08:34,348 --> 00:08:37,251 even hug a teammate, but he cannot play! 211 00:08:37,351 --> 00:08:38,619 I don't get it. Why? 212 00:08:38,719 --> 00:08:41,054 Does the ball have a weak immune system? What's going on? 213 00:08:41,154 --> 00:08:43,223 I mean, it's crazy, just think about it, just think about it. 214 00:08:43,323 --> 00:08:46,293 Kyrie can't play, but he can sit in the stands, right? 215 00:08:46,393 --> 00:08:49,563 Like a fan. And then, as a fan, what happens if he gets picked 216 00:08:49,663 --> 00:08:51,665 to take the half-court shot to win the car? 217 00:08:51,765 --> 00:08:54,735 Can he do that? What are those rules? How does it work? 218 00:08:55,903 --> 00:08:58,138 And you know the funny thing about Kyrie being in the stands 219 00:08:58,238 --> 00:09:01,341 is that this is the one time a fan is screaming at the team 220 00:09:01,441 --> 00:09:04,011 that he could play better than them and he actually could. 221 00:09:04,111 --> 00:09:05,546 They probably looked over like, 222 00:09:05,646 --> 00:09:08,615 "Who's saying that sh-- Oh, yeah, yeah, my bad." 223 00:09:08,715 --> 00:09:10,083 I actually wonder if Kyrie's the only person 224 00:09:10,184 --> 00:09:12,019 that this has happened to. Like, are there other people 225 00:09:12,052 --> 00:09:14,188 who can't work because of vaccine mandates but then 226 00:09:14,288 --> 00:09:17,758 they still show up to the office to cheer on their coworkers? 227 00:09:17,858 --> 00:09:20,060 You're killing it, Steve! You're killing it. 228 00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:23,130 Send that report, baby! You got this. You got-- 229 00:09:23,230 --> 00:09:24,865 Oh, shit. Did you just click "reply all"? 230 00:09:25,032 --> 00:09:27,434 Oh, man, you're so screwed. 231 00:09:27,534 --> 00:09:31,705 Boo! Take him off. Take him off! 232 00:09:31,805 --> 00:09:33,807 All right, let's move on to some entertainment news. 233 00:09:33,907 --> 00:09:36,443 Awards season is now in full swing, 234 00:09:36,543 --> 00:09:39,680 and every event brings so much to look forward to. 235 00:09:39,780 --> 00:09:42,049 Who's gonna take home the big prize? 236 00:09:42,149 --> 00:09:44,184 Who's gonna win the red carpet? 237 00:09:44,284 --> 00:09:45,652 Will this finally be the year 238 00:09:45,752 --> 00:09:49,256 they use in EDM song for the in memorium? 239 00:09:49,356 --> 00:09:52,226 ♪ All these people died, died, died, died, died ♪ 240 00:09:52,326 --> 00:09:55,762 ♪ Di-di-die, died-died-died, d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d, died ♪ 241 00:09:55,863 --> 00:09:58,265 ♪ They're all dead. ♪ (imitates fast beat) 242 00:09:58,365 --> 00:10:00,133 Now I see why they don't do that. 243 00:10:00,234 --> 00:10:02,102 Now, of course, 244 00:10:02,202 --> 00:10:03,604 there's always the question 245 00:10:03,704 --> 00:10:06,773 of who's gonna give the most viral speech at an awards show. 246 00:10:06,874 --> 00:10:11,411 And today that award goes to the director Jane Campion. 247 00:10:11,512 --> 00:10:13,413 NEWSMAN: The Critics Choice Awards last night, 248 00:10:13,514 --> 00:10:15,616 the Netflix film The Power of the Dog 249 00:10:15,716 --> 00:10:18,051 getting plenty of momentum heading into the Oscars, 250 00:10:18,151 --> 00:10:20,287 walking away with the award for Best Film. 251 00:10:20,387 --> 00:10:23,824 Director Jane Campion taking home the Best Director award. 252 00:10:23,924 --> 00:10:26,693 While onstage, she made this comment 253 00:10:26,793 --> 00:10:30,597 about Serena and Venus Williams that has people talking. 254 00:10:30,697 --> 00:10:33,467 Give my love out to my fellow-fellow-fellow-- 255 00:10:33,567 --> 00:10:35,469 the guys. (laughs) 256 00:10:35,569 --> 00:10:36,870 (laughter) 257 00:10:36,970 --> 00:10:39,006 The nominees. And-and, you know, Serena and Venus, 258 00:10:39,106 --> 00:10:40,841 you are such marvels. 259 00:10:40,941 --> 00:10:43,510 However, you do not play against the guys. 260 00:10:43,610 --> 00:10:45,612 (chuckles) 261 00:10:45,712 --> 00:10:46,880 Like I have to. 262 00:10:46,980 --> 00:10:48,215 (laughter) 263 00:10:48,315 --> 00:10:50,350 -(man cheers loudly) -(cheering) 264 00:10:55,355 --> 00:10:57,057 Okay. 265 00:10:57,157 --> 00:10:59,927 Okay. I know, I know, 266 00:11:00,060 --> 00:11:02,062 I know a lot of people are angry about this. 267 00:11:02,129 --> 00:11:03,163 I know. 268 00:11:03,263 --> 00:11:05,199 But, honestly, 269 00:11:05,299 --> 00:11:06,500 I can see... 270 00:11:06,600 --> 00:11:07,868 I can see both sides. 271 00:11:07,968 --> 00:11:09,436 I can see both sides. First of all, 272 00:11:09,536 --> 00:11:10,737 first of all, 273 00:11:10,838 --> 00:11:13,273 Campion was obviously trying to make a point 274 00:11:13,373 --> 00:11:16,143 about how hard it is for female directors 275 00:11:16,243 --> 00:11:17,678 to break through in Hollywood, 276 00:11:17,778 --> 00:11:19,346 which is true. 277 00:11:19,446 --> 00:11:21,114 Right? I mean, in her defense, 278 00:11:21,215 --> 00:11:23,250 name a female director. 279 00:11:23,350 --> 00:11:24,818 Huh? See? You see? Nothing. 280 00:11:24,918 --> 00:11:26,687 Yeah, you were like, "Uh, Steven Spielberg? 281 00:11:26,787 --> 00:11:28,255 Uh, please don't cancel me, Trevor!" 282 00:11:28,355 --> 00:11:30,424 Too late! 283 00:11:30,524 --> 00:11:31,959 And that's what Jane Campion means. 284 00:11:32,092 --> 00:11:33,760 It's a big deal when a woman breaks through 285 00:11:33,861 --> 00:11:35,762 in a category that's always dominated by men. 286 00:11:35,863 --> 00:11:37,831 Yeah. And if you-- if you watch the clip, 287 00:11:37,931 --> 00:11:40,100 you can see Serena Williams loved that moment. 288 00:11:40,167 --> 00:11:41,301 She was clapping hard. 289 00:11:41,401 --> 00:11:43,737 But Venus, Venus, well, 290 00:11:43,837 --> 00:11:45,239 she looked like someone just told her 291 00:11:45,339 --> 00:11:48,542 how well-spoken her backhand is. 292 00:11:48,642 --> 00:11:50,344 Now, on the other hand, on the other hand, 293 00:11:50,444 --> 00:11:52,112 I get why a lot of people found this cringey. 294 00:11:52,179 --> 00:11:53,380 I totally understand it. 295 00:11:53,480 --> 00:11:57,150 Because it felt like a white woman on top of her game 296 00:11:57,251 --> 00:12:00,120 was telling two Black women on top of their game 297 00:12:00,220 --> 00:12:02,756 that her game is harder than theirs. 298 00:12:02,856 --> 00:12:05,692 Which can sound rude anytime 299 00:12:05,792 --> 00:12:08,095 but especially in an awards speech, 300 00:12:08,195 --> 00:12:10,397 where, traditionally, the only person you're supposed to offend 301 00:12:10,497 --> 00:12:13,200 is your spouse when you forget to thank them. 302 00:12:13,300 --> 00:12:14,868 And, also, if I was Campion, 303 00:12:14,968 --> 00:12:16,603 I wouldn't want to be challenging the Williams sisters 304 00:12:16,703 --> 00:12:17,604 to anything. 305 00:12:17,704 --> 00:12:19,139 'Cause they are competitors. 306 00:12:19,239 --> 00:12:20,574 Yeah, knowing them, they're gonna start learning 307 00:12:20,674 --> 00:12:23,310 to direct movies and then go on to win next year's Oscars 308 00:12:23,410 --> 00:12:25,078 in straight sets. 309 00:12:25,979 --> 00:12:27,681 And because of the backlash, because of the backlash, 310 00:12:27,781 --> 00:12:29,550 Jane Campion apologized today, because, obviously, 311 00:12:29,650 --> 00:12:31,318 she felt bad. Right? 312 00:12:31,418 --> 00:12:32,886 She wasn't trying to hurt anybody. 313 00:12:32,986 --> 00:12:35,722 If I'm honest, I don't think she meant anything nefarious. 314 00:12:35,822 --> 00:12:38,992 She was trying to tell a joke. It landed weird. 315 00:12:39,092 --> 00:12:40,160 You know, you almost wish 316 00:12:40,260 --> 00:12:41,662 that someone could have intercepted her 317 00:12:41,762 --> 00:12:44,431 right before she said that line. You know? 318 00:12:44,531 --> 00:12:46,333 Where's Kanye when you actually need him? 319 00:12:46,433 --> 00:12:48,235 Actually, don't answer that. Don't answer that. 320 00:12:48,335 --> 00:12:49,670 All right, that's it for the headlines. 321 00:12:49,770 --> 00:12:52,172 But don't go away. Because when we come back, 322 00:12:52,272 --> 00:12:55,609 we're gonna bring you all the latest from the war in Ukraine. 323 00:12:55,709 --> 00:12:58,178 And, spoiler alert, it's still bad. 324 00:12:58,278 --> 00:13:01,315 -So don't... -I guess I'm unretiring, so... 325 00:13:01,415 --> 00:13:03,450 -Oh. -'Cause I want-- Do-- 326 00:13:03,550 --> 00:13:05,052 I'd love to have my job back. 327 00:13:05,152 --> 00:13:07,054 What-- Well, but you were retired though. 328 00:13:07,087 --> 00:13:08,956 Ri-- But-but I'd like to unretire, 329 00:13:09,056 --> 00:13:11,191 'cause I was retiring to hear what you had to say about me, 330 00:13:11,291 --> 00:13:12,259 and-and you didn't-- 331 00:13:12,359 --> 00:13:13,427 It seemed like you just kind of... 332 00:13:13,527 --> 00:13:14,761 skipped right past that. 333 00:13:14,862 --> 00:13:17,331 So I'd love it if I could have my job back, please. 334 00:13:17,431 --> 00:13:20,067 Oh, damn. I-I... Roy took your job. 335 00:13:20,133 --> 00:13:22,102 (stammers) Oh, Roy-Roy took my job? 336 00:13:22,202 --> 00:13:23,604 But Roy already has a job. 337 00:13:23,704 --> 00:13:25,405 Yeah, and then he was like, he could use another one. 338 00:13:25,506 --> 00:13:27,207 -He's-he's got another job? -Yeah. 339 00:13:27,307 --> 00:13:29,943 It was, like, a whole-- 'Cause you were gone and then, like... 340 00:13:30,077 --> 00:13:31,745 I retired, but then I went like that, 341 00:13:31,845 --> 00:13:33,113 'cause I just wanted to hear what you were... 342 00:13:33,213 --> 00:13:34,615 I thought you had, like, a thing in your eye, 343 00:13:34,715 --> 00:13:35,782 and I was like, "That's why you're retiring. 344 00:13:35,883 --> 00:13:37,184 Your eyesight's going." 345 00:13:37,284 --> 00:13:39,086 Trevor, I just wanted to hear you say some nice stuff 346 00:13:39,186 --> 00:13:40,954 -about me, but-but it never happened. -Oh, man. 347 00:13:41,088 --> 00:13:42,389 -I'm just unretiring. -Oh, man. 348 00:13:42,489 --> 00:13:44,625 I'm sorry. I'll-I'll say it now. Man, my bad. I didn't know-- 349 00:13:44,725 --> 00:13:46,126 -Um, nice things about Michael Kosta. -Yeah. 350 00:13:46,226 --> 00:13:48,462 -Cool. -What I love about Michael Kosta is that, 351 00:13:48,562 --> 00:13:50,330 even though he's left the show, 352 00:13:50,430 --> 00:13:52,833 -he doesn't begrudge anybody at the show... -That... 353 00:13:52,933 --> 00:13:55,102 ...and he leaves his-his security clearance behind 354 00:13:55,202 --> 00:13:56,803 and he doesn't make a scene of it. 355 00:13:56,904 --> 00:13:58,305 And he doesn't make anybody feel bad. 356 00:13:58,405 --> 00:14:01,642 I do-- I do appreciate all this, but I-I really do need the job. 357 00:14:01,742 --> 00:14:03,644 That was just kind of a c-comedic... 358 00:14:03,744 --> 00:14:05,179 Oh, shit. Okay, um... 359 00:14:05,279 --> 00:14:06,380 -So, can I work here or does Roy... -Let's... 360 00:14:06,480 --> 00:14:08,115 It's Roy's fourth job, but maybe-maybe I... 361 00:14:08,215 --> 00:14:09,783 Let's-let's-- You know what? Let's-let's talk-- 362 00:14:09,883 --> 00:14:11,318 -let's talk about it and then, um... -Okay. 363 00:14:11,418 --> 00:14:13,220 Yeah, that was, uh... Let's chat to Roy. 364 00:14:13,320 --> 00:14:14,655 -We'll-we'll chat to Roy. -We'll-we'll figure-- 365 00:14:14,755 --> 00:14:15,956 we'll figure something out. We'll figure something out. 366 00:14:16,056 --> 00:14:17,691 -Thanks. -And even if we don't, 367 00:14:17,791 --> 00:14:19,726 I mean, we'll never forget you. 368 00:14:22,829 --> 00:14:23,830 Welcome back to The Daily Show. 369 00:14:23,930 --> 00:14:25,198 It is now day 19 370 00:14:25,298 --> 00:14:27,066 of the Russian invasion of Ukraine, 371 00:14:27,166 --> 00:14:30,103 a war that has quickly turned Ukraine into a giant battlefield 372 00:14:30,203 --> 00:14:32,438 and Russia into a giant North Korea. 373 00:14:32,538 --> 00:14:35,375 So, let's catch up on the latest developments in our ongoing 374 00:14:35,475 --> 00:14:37,577 coverage of the war in Ukraine. 375 00:14:37,677 --> 00:14:39,712 ♪ ♪ 376 00:14:43,883 --> 00:14:46,552 Thanks to a fierce Ukrainian resistance, Russia has been 377 00:14:46,652 --> 00:14:50,490 frustrated by its inability to capture any major city so far. 378 00:14:50,590 --> 00:14:53,292 Which is why more and more, they've decided to 379 00:14:53,393 --> 00:14:55,828 just bomb those cities from the sky. 380 00:14:55,928 --> 00:14:58,698 Apartment complexes, hospitals, 381 00:14:58,798 --> 00:15:01,100 basically, the less threatening the building, the more 382 00:15:01,200 --> 00:15:04,137 Russia wants to bomb it. And that has led to a fierce debate 383 00:15:04,237 --> 00:15:07,040 in the West over how to respond. 384 00:15:07,140 --> 00:15:09,709 Should NATO send Ukraine fighter jets? 385 00:15:09,809 --> 00:15:12,712 Should NATO enforce a no-fly zone over Ukraine? 386 00:15:12,812 --> 00:15:15,548 So far, the answers to both of those have been, "No," 387 00:15:15,648 --> 00:15:18,851 over fears that doing either would spark a direct conflict 388 00:15:18,951 --> 00:15:21,387 between NATO and Russia. 389 00:15:21,487 --> 00:15:25,758 But over the weekend, it was Russia edging everyone closer 390 00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:27,293 to direct conflict. 391 00:15:27,393 --> 00:15:30,730 A war that many fear could spill into other countries has taken 392 00:15:30,830 --> 00:15:33,533 a dangerous turn, with Russia firing on a 393 00:15:33,633 --> 00:15:36,736 Ukrainian military base close to the Polish border 394 00:15:36,836 --> 00:15:38,471 and the NATO alliance. 395 00:15:38,571 --> 00:15:41,774 The sky turned red, witnesses say, 396 00:15:41,941 --> 00:15:45,511 when roughly 30 Russian missiles struck the Yavoriv training base 397 00:15:45,611 --> 00:15:49,382 in Western Ukraine, leaving this smoldering crater, 398 00:15:49,482 --> 00:15:53,853 35 people dead and an escalation of the war now only a few 399 00:15:53,953 --> 00:15:56,823 miles from Poland, a key NATO ally. 400 00:15:56,956 --> 00:15:59,492 The base was routinely used by U.S. and NATO trainers 401 00:15:59,592 --> 00:16:00,960 over the years. 402 00:16:00,993 --> 00:16:03,596 NEWSWOMAN: The attack came a day after Moscow warned 403 00:16:03,696 --> 00:16:07,400 it would try to destroy foreign shipments of weapons to Ukraine, 404 00:16:07,500 --> 00:16:10,103 calling them "legitimate targets." 405 00:16:10,203 --> 00:16:14,073 Yeah. Believe it or not, for the first time, Russia bombed 406 00:16:14,173 --> 00:16:17,710 a military base very close to Poland's border. 407 00:16:17,810 --> 00:16:21,647 Just 15 miles away. Which definitely seems like a warning. 408 00:16:21,748 --> 00:16:23,950 I mean, 15 miles is basically nothing 409 00:16:24,050 --> 00:16:25,551 according to my friend who can't stop telling me 410 00:16:25,651 --> 00:16:26,586 that he's training for a marathon. 411 00:16:26,686 --> 00:16:28,154 I get it. You run far. 412 00:16:28,254 --> 00:16:30,923 In fact, 15 miles is basically as close you can get 413 00:16:30,957 --> 00:16:32,692 to bombing Poland without actually hitting it, 414 00:16:32,792 --> 00:16:36,796 which means this missile strike was basically Russia going, 415 00:16:36,929 --> 00:16:38,664 "Oh, I wish a NATO would." 416 00:16:38,765 --> 00:16:40,633 And on top of that, Russia's also warning 417 00:16:40,733 --> 00:16:42,835 that it's not gonna just let the West 418 00:16:42,935 --> 00:16:44,737 keep sending weapons into Ukraine. 419 00:16:44,837 --> 00:16:47,940 It's gonna start attacking those shipments. 420 00:16:48,041 --> 00:16:49,175 Which is scary, 421 00:16:49,275 --> 00:16:50,777 but, I mean, of course they want to stop 422 00:16:50,943 --> 00:16:52,211 those shipments from coming in. 423 00:16:52,311 --> 00:16:54,013 You know, NATO is sending Ukraine 424 00:16:54,113 --> 00:16:56,215 its most sophisticated weapons. 425 00:16:56,315 --> 00:16:57,950 Meanwhile, Russia is fighting 426 00:16:58,051 --> 00:16:59,652 with the equivalent of a flip phone. 427 00:16:59,752 --> 00:17:01,721 So, if you're a UPS guy 428 00:17:01,821 --> 00:17:03,956 who gets a package that looks like this, 429 00:17:04,057 --> 00:17:06,192 you might want to watch yourself. 430 00:17:06,292 --> 00:17:10,163 Now, both of these developments are concerning 431 00:17:10,263 --> 00:17:13,433 because, like I said, nobody wants World War III. 432 00:17:13,533 --> 00:17:15,568 We don't want it to start for any reason. 433 00:17:15,668 --> 00:17:17,403 I mean, America hasn't even defeated 434 00:17:17,503 --> 00:17:19,372 all the Nazis from the last World War. 435 00:17:19,472 --> 00:17:22,108 And like my mom always says, you can't have more 436 00:17:22,208 --> 00:17:24,477 until you finish what's on your plate. 437 00:17:24,577 --> 00:17:26,946 But while everyone is trying to keep the war 438 00:17:27,046 --> 00:17:28,247 from spilling into the rest of the Europe, 439 00:17:28,347 --> 00:17:29,549 as it turns out, 440 00:17:29,649 --> 00:17:33,052 it might already be spilling into China. 441 00:17:33,152 --> 00:17:34,387 NEWSWOMAN: We're learning this morning that Russia 442 00:17:34,487 --> 00:17:36,122 has asked China for military support 443 00:17:36,222 --> 00:17:37,757 and other aid for this invasion. 444 00:17:37,924 --> 00:17:40,293 That is really concerning for the West 445 00:17:40,393 --> 00:17:42,428 and could be a real blow to these Ukrainian forces 446 00:17:42,528 --> 00:17:44,163 if, indeed, uh, this happens. 447 00:17:44,263 --> 00:17:46,332 U.S. officials tell us it's true, 448 00:17:46,432 --> 00:17:49,235 and the White House National Security Advisor Jake Sullivan 449 00:17:49,335 --> 00:17:52,972 is traveling to Rome today to meet with Chinese officials, 450 00:17:53,072 --> 00:17:57,210 and he says he will warn them not to help Vladimir Putin. 451 00:17:57,310 --> 00:18:00,646 We are communicating directly, privately to Beijing. 452 00:18:00,747 --> 00:18:02,982 We will not allow that to go forward 453 00:18:03,082 --> 00:18:06,586 and allow there to be a, uh, lifeline to Russia 454 00:18:06,686 --> 00:18:07,854 from these economic sanctions 455 00:18:07,954 --> 00:18:10,089 from any country anywhere in the world. 456 00:18:10,189 --> 00:18:12,058 Okay, look, I-I can see 457 00:18:12,158 --> 00:18:14,193 why America doesn't want Russia teaming up with China. 458 00:18:14,293 --> 00:18:16,496 That would be an unstoppable power couple. 459 00:18:16,596 --> 00:18:18,297 Like Bennifer but with nukes. 460 00:18:18,398 --> 00:18:22,135 But getting tough on Russia is one thing. 461 00:18:22,235 --> 00:18:25,238 How does America plan to turn the screws on China? 462 00:18:25,338 --> 00:18:28,307 "Hey, you better do what we say, or we won't let you sell us 463 00:18:28,408 --> 00:18:30,276 "literally everything we need to survive anymore 464 00:18:30,376 --> 00:18:32,979 because we haven't made anything ourselves in 30 years." 465 00:18:33,079 --> 00:18:35,648 Shit. I bet America would sacrifice three or four states 466 00:18:35,748 --> 00:18:37,316 just to keep getting new iPhones. 467 00:18:37,417 --> 00:18:39,786 And whether China decides to help Russia or not, 468 00:18:39,919 --> 00:18:42,922 you've got to admit, this is embarrassing for Russia. 469 00:18:43,022 --> 00:18:44,323 I mean, think about it. 470 00:18:44,424 --> 00:18:46,526 They're not even, what, three weeks into this war? 471 00:18:46,626 --> 00:18:48,127 And they're already like, 472 00:18:48,227 --> 00:18:49,629 "China, can you help us? 473 00:18:49,729 --> 00:18:51,964 We ran out of war stuff." 474 00:18:52,065 --> 00:18:53,332 It's like when you were a kid at the arcade 475 00:18:53,433 --> 00:18:54,734 and you used up all your tokens 476 00:18:54,834 --> 00:18:56,936 trying to beat the first level of a video game. 477 00:18:56,969 --> 00:18:58,371 Then you just got to walk around, 478 00:18:58,471 --> 00:19:00,073 begging other people for their tokens. 479 00:19:00,173 --> 00:19:01,808 And when that fails, 480 00:19:01,941 --> 00:19:04,077 you spend the rest of the party fingerbanging all the machines, 481 00:19:04,177 --> 00:19:06,612 hoping someone left a token behind-- remember those days? 482 00:19:06,713 --> 00:19:08,815 But as Putin looks for help on the battlefield, 483 00:19:08,948 --> 00:19:12,652 the fallout is also continuing to mount inside his own borders. 484 00:19:12,752 --> 00:19:15,955 Seemingly every day, Russia becomes 485 00:19:16,022 --> 00:19:18,558 more and more isolated from the rest of the world. 486 00:19:18,658 --> 00:19:20,960 They can't fly anywhere, they can't order anything 487 00:19:21,027 --> 00:19:23,896 off of Amazon. They can't even use Airbnb. 488 00:19:23,996 --> 00:19:24,964 Which means now they have to film themselves 489 00:19:25,064 --> 00:19:26,399 going to the bathroom. 490 00:19:26,499 --> 00:19:29,535 And every day, the Russian people become more cut off 491 00:19:29,635 --> 00:19:32,405 from the truth about the war. 492 00:19:32,505 --> 00:19:35,141 All the independent media has been shut down. 493 00:19:35,241 --> 00:19:39,545 So the only thing that they have now is state TV. 494 00:19:39,645 --> 00:19:42,615 Although today an antiwar message 495 00:19:42,715 --> 00:19:44,951 managed to slip on the air. 496 00:19:45,051 --> 00:19:47,920 Provocative and courageous move from an antiwar protester 497 00:19:47,954 --> 00:19:50,723 in Russia. Watch her bold and brave act 498 00:19:50,823 --> 00:19:54,961 during a prime time broadcast on Russian state TV this evening. 499 00:19:55,061 --> 00:19:57,096 (speaking Russian) 500 00:20:01,934 --> 00:20:05,438 TAPPER: That sign reads, in Russian, "No war. Stop the war. 501 00:20:05,538 --> 00:20:09,075 Do not believe propaganda. They tell you lies here." 502 00:20:09,175 --> 00:20:13,846 The last line of the sign read "Russians against war." 503 00:20:13,946 --> 00:20:16,082 The program appeared to quickly cut away to video. 504 00:20:16,182 --> 00:20:18,651 At this hour it's unclear what happened to this woman 505 00:20:18,751 --> 00:20:20,853 after her on-set protest. 506 00:20:20,953 --> 00:20:23,890 Russia, of course, does not allow freedom of speech. 507 00:20:23,990 --> 00:20:26,092 Wow. 508 00:20:26,192 --> 00:20:29,362 That is either an incredibly brave protester 509 00:20:29,462 --> 00:20:32,565 or a very horrible cue card person. 510 00:20:32,665 --> 00:20:34,400 No, for real though, for real, that was actually 511 00:20:34,500 --> 00:20:38,037 an employee at that state TV channel, which is brave. 512 00:20:38,137 --> 00:20:40,139 That's one of the bravest things I've ever seen. 513 00:20:40,239 --> 00:20:42,041 Although, knowing Russia's propaganda machine, 514 00:20:42,141 --> 00:20:43,376 it's probably gonna find a way to, like, 515 00:20:43,476 --> 00:20:45,244 twist this whole thing. Yeah, they'll be like, 516 00:20:45,344 --> 00:20:46,512 (Russian accent): "You saw the sign-- 'No war.' 517 00:20:46,612 --> 00:20:49,115 "There is no war. Everything is normal. All good." 518 00:20:49,215 --> 00:20:50,583 (regular accent): But this protest aside, 519 00:20:50,683 --> 00:20:52,685 it's almost impossible for Russians to get information 520 00:20:52,785 --> 00:20:55,021 from the outside world now. Even on the Internet. 521 00:20:55,121 --> 00:20:56,923 There's no Facebook. There's no Twitter in Russia. 522 00:20:56,989 --> 00:21:00,093 And now there's no cat photos. 523 00:21:00,193 --> 00:21:02,428 Instagram has gone dark in Russia. 524 00:21:02,528 --> 00:21:05,932 The country shut down the social media platform at midnight. 525 00:21:05,998 --> 00:21:08,935 Russian regulators gave people 48 hours to 526 00:21:09,035 --> 00:21:12,472 save all their photos and videos before the service ended. 527 00:21:12,572 --> 00:21:14,140 So there's are all these influencers in Russia 528 00:21:14,240 --> 00:21:16,476 with, like, 23 million-something followers 529 00:21:16,576 --> 00:21:18,778 that are, like, sobbing and very upset 530 00:21:18,945 --> 00:21:20,313 that they're losing all their followers. 531 00:21:20,413 --> 00:21:23,483 NEWSWOMAN: Reality TV star Olga Buzova posted this video 532 00:21:23,583 --> 00:21:24,884 of her crying and saying, 533 00:21:24,951 --> 00:21:27,186 "It feels like a big part of my heart 534 00:21:27,286 --> 00:21:29,889 and my life is being taken away from me." 535 00:21:29,956 --> 00:21:33,025 Yeah. If you thought being a Ukrainian refugee was bad, 536 00:21:33,126 --> 00:21:36,195 imagine being forced to pick up your whole life on Instagram 537 00:21:36,295 --> 00:21:37,497 and move it over to Cameo. 538 00:21:37,597 --> 00:21:38,898 That's tragic. 539 00:21:38,931 --> 00:21:40,400 I mean, for real though, Instagram shutting down 540 00:21:40,500 --> 00:21:42,535 in Russia does really affect people's lives. 541 00:21:42,635 --> 00:21:44,570 Because Instagram is used in a lot of ways. 542 00:21:44,670 --> 00:21:46,906 You know? Yes, it makes influencers money, yes. 543 00:21:46,973 --> 00:21:48,908 But it also gives small businesses 544 00:21:48,975 --> 00:21:50,676 the opportunity to promote themselves. 545 00:21:50,777 --> 00:21:53,780 It lets people share important life updates with each other. 546 00:21:53,913 --> 00:21:55,681 You know? It lets creepy dudes tell women 547 00:21:55,782 --> 00:21:58,551 who are clearly porn bots that their ass is flames. 548 00:21:58,651 --> 00:22:00,019 It does a lot of things. 549 00:22:00,119 --> 00:22:01,521 But... 550 00:22:01,621 --> 00:22:04,390 luckily for Russians going through Instagram withdrawal, 551 00:22:04,490 --> 00:22:07,060 Putin has come through again with a new app 552 00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:10,229 that I think is even better. 553 00:22:10,329 --> 00:22:12,999 (Russian accent): Comrades, are you sad that Mother Russia 554 00:22:13,099 --> 00:22:15,835 has banned neo-Nazi Instagram? 555 00:22:15,935 --> 00:22:17,003 Well, do not worry 556 00:22:17,103 --> 00:22:19,138 or we put you in jail. 557 00:22:19,238 --> 00:22:20,773 Now you do not need Instagram, 558 00:22:20,940 --> 00:22:23,509 because Russia has new photo app. 559 00:22:23,609 --> 00:22:25,178 Instavlad. 560 00:22:25,278 --> 00:22:29,282 Instavlad is new Russia-approved way to waste time on toilet. 561 00:22:29,382 --> 00:22:31,684 Now you can show haters around the world 562 00:22:31,784 --> 00:22:33,486 you're still living best life. 563 00:22:33,586 --> 00:22:36,489 Does not matter if you can't fly anywhere and have no money. 564 00:22:36,589 --> 00:22:38,991 You are happy eating stew at home. 565 00:22:39,092 --> 00:22:41,260 And Instavlad has all the best filters, 566 00:22:41,360 --> 00:22:44,897 so you can see what you look like if you had reason to smile. 567 00:22:44,997 --> 00:22:46,899 And with Close Comrade mode, 568 00:22:46,966 --> 00:22:50,002 your private pictures will only be visible to your best friends 569 00:22:50,103 --> 00:22:52,305 and also our secret police. 570 00:22:52,405 --> 00:22:54,006 And if you want sexy thots, 571 00:22:54,107 --> 00:22:55,575 we have the hottest one. 572 00:22:55,675 --> 00:22:57,777 Look at him. He is so sexy. 573 00:22:57,910 --> 00:23:00,380 Like and comment. Comment some more. 574 00:23:00,480 --> 00:23:01,714 You did you not comment enough. 575 00:23:01,814 --> 00:23:03,916 Now we put you in jail. 576 00:23:04,016 --> 00:23:05,418 Instavlad. 577 00:23:05,518 --> 00:23:07,920 You know you like it. 578 00:23:07,954 --> 00:23:09,222 All right, when we come back, 579 00:23:09,322 --> 00:23:11,591 Evan Rachel Wood will be joining me on the show 580 00:23:11,691 --> 00:23:13,259 to have a really important conversation 581 00:23:13,359 --> 00:23:15,928 about how we deal with sexual abuse. 582 00:23:15,962 --> 00:23:17,263 So stay tuned. 583 00:23:19,197 --> 00:23:20,598 Welcome back to The Daily Show. My guest tonight 584 00:23:20,698 --> 00:23:23,034 is actor and activist Evan Rachel Wood. 585 00:23:23,134 --> 00:23:24,502 She's here to talk about her 586 00:23:24,602 --> 00:23:27,405 new documentary about surviving domestic violence, 587 00:23:27,505 --> 00:23:29,440 entitled Phoenix Rising. 588 00:23:29,541 --> 00:23:33,044 WOOD: He called me 158 times and cut himself every time I didn't 589 00:23:33,144 --> 00:23:36,047 pick up the phone, and said he was gonna kill himself. 590 00:23:36,147 --> 00:23:38,850 This is when people in my life started saying, 591 00:23:38,950 --> 00:23:40,251 "Y-You need to get a restraining order." 592 00:23:40,351 --> 00:23:41,986 And I said "absolutely not." 593 00:23:42,086 --> 00:23:45,223 Absolutely not. That-that-- The getting a restraining order 594 00:23:45,323 --> 00:23:46,691 seemed crazy to me, because I was like, 595 00:23:46,791 --> 00:23:49,460 "You're only gonna make him more mad," and I think a lot of women 596 00:23:49,561 --> 00:23:51,496 feel like that, that's why they don't get restraining orders. 597 00:23:51,596 --> 00:23:55,166 Because you will anger the beast. 598 00:23:56,134 --> 00:23:58,469 Evan Rachel Wood, welcome to The Daily Show. 599 00:23:58,570 --> 00:24:01,139 -Thanks. Thanks for having me. -It's good to have you here, um, 600 00:24:01,239 --> 00:24:03,942 especially to talk about a topic that I think is one of the more 601 00:24:04,042 --> 00:24:07,045 sensitive topics that we-we're discussing in society today, 602 00:24:07,145 --> 00:24:10,481 but also one of the more pertinent topics that we're 603 00:24:10,582 --> 00:24:12,016 discussing in society today. 604 00:24:12,116 --> 00:24:15,220 -And it's in and around the issue of abuse. -Mm-hmm. 605 00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:18,456 You know, sexual abuse, which, as we learn from the 606 00:24:18,556 --> 00:24:21,092 Me Too movement, is far more rampant than people would have 607 00:24:21,159 --> 00:24:24,095 wanted to admit or even some people realized. 608 00:24:24,128 --> 00:24:26,965 And you've created a-a documentary here. 609 00:24:27,098 --> 00:24:28,933 Let's start with the why, maybe. 610 00:24:29,100 --> 00:24:32,937 And not why the documentary, but the timing of the documentary. 611 00:24:33,104 --> 00:24:35,974 -Mm-hmm. -So many people want to let go of pain in their life. 612 00:24:36,107 --> 00:24:38,176 So many people want to move on. 613 00:24:38,276 --> 00:24:40,011 It feels like you've done the exact opposite. You've gone 614 00:24:40,111 --> 00:24:42,247 back into the pain. You've gone back into the story. 615 00:24:42,347 --> 00:24:45,717 -Why, and why now? -Well, it is 16 years later. 616 00:24:45,817 --> 00:24:49,754 So, uh, I do get a lot of people commenting on how 617 00:24:49,854 --> 00:24:53,358 I'm able to speak about things and put on a brave face and... 618 00:24:53,458 --> 00:24:55,693 and... how "strong" I am. 619 00:24:55,793 --> 00:24:58,329 Um... But it-it took 16 years to get here. 620 00:24:58,429 --> 00:25:01,966 And the first thing that I did when I got out was 621 00:25:02,133 --> 00:25:04,135 try to get as far away from it as possible. 622 00:25:04,235 --> 00:25:05,403 Try to forget it ever happened. 623 00:25:05,503 --> 00:25:08,206 You're-You're running. You're trying to forget 624 00:25:08,306 --> 00:25:09,541 -that it ever happened. -Yeah. 625 00:25:09,641 --> 00:25:12,544 Um, and then, of course, it catches up with you, 626 00:25:12,644 --> 00:25:15,413 and, uh, I-I couldn't run from it. It started-- 627 00:25:15,513 --> 00:25:18,516 the trauma started to seep into other areas of my life. 628 00:25:18,616 --> 00:25:20,251 So I threw myself into-into therapy, 629 00:25:20,351 --> 00:25:21,986 which I highly recommend if you have the resources. 630 00:25:22,086 --> 00:25:23,655 -Yeah. Yeah. -Unfortunately, in this country, 631 00:25:23,755 --> 00:25:27,091 you know, mental health is not always at the top of the list. 632 00:25:27,191 --> 00:25:29,260 Um, and-and it really... 633 00:25:29,360 --> 00:25:32,230 I... I-I was planning on taking this to my grave. 634 00:25:32,330 --> 00:25:35,333 -I really was not planning on saying anything ever. -Wow. 635 00:25:35,433 --> 00:25:36,734 I-I was that afraid. 636 00:25:36,834 --> 00:25:39,103 Um, and that afraid of retaliation. 637 00:25:39,137 --> 00:25:41,506 I just did not feel safe, and I felt very alone. 638 00:25:41,606 --> 00:25:42,941 I thought I was the only one. 639 00:25:43,107 --> 00:25:45,210 And you'll hear that a lot from-from abuse survivors. 640 00:25:45,310 --> 00:25:48,346 When I, uh, first was asked to testify 641 00:25:48,446 --> 00:25:50,114 for the Sexual Assault Survivors' Bill of Rights 642 00:25:50,181 --> 00:25:51,950 in front of Congress about my story, 643 00:25:52,116 --> 00:25:53,384 I really thought that was gonna be it. 644 00:25:53,484 --> 00:25:55,420 I thought, "Okay, here. I'm gonna tell my story, 645 00:25:55,520 --> 00:25:57,989 and that's it. I'm gonna be done." 646 00:25:58,122 --> 00:26:02,393 And then women started popping up-- and men-- online 647 00:26:02,493 --> 00:26:06,764 -that had eerily similar stories. -Man. 648 00:26:06,865 --> 00:26:09,968 But new details that I knew they weren't lying. 649 00:26:10,134 --> 00:26:12,136 There were very, very specific details that I... 650 00:26:12,170 --> 00:26:14,572 Uh, there's just no way you could know those things 651 00:26:14,672 --> 00:26:17,575 unless-unless you were toe to toe with that person. 652 00:26:17,675 --> 00:26:20,278 So I knew it was real, and that's when it changed. 653 00:26:20,378 --> 00:26:22,981 That's when I knew I couldn't stay quiet. 654 00:26:23,081 --> 00:26:25,216 You know, when you say "that person," 655 00:26:25,316 --> 00:26:28,219 I guess one of the reasons the story is as big as it is 656 00:26:28,319 --> 00:26:29,387 is not just because of what happened 657 00:26:29,487 --> 00:26:30,688 but it's because of who it involves. 658 00:26:30,788 --> 00:26:32,857 -Yes. -You know, you named Marilyn Manson. 659 00:26:32,957 --> 00:26:35,159 In cases of abuse, oftentimes, we think of it 660 00:26:35,260 --> 00:26:36,828 as being black or white, good and bad. 661 00:26:36,928 --> 00:26:39,163 -Yes. -You know, we... There are layers to people, 662 00:26:39,264 --> 00:26:40,999 which make it complicated. 663 00:26:41,099 --> 00:26:43,668 And you've talked about... you've talked about his history. 664 00:26:43,768 --> 00:26:45,570 You've talked about, you know, his history with abuse. 665 00:26:45,670 --> 00:26:47,105 You've talked about his-his history 666 00:26:47,205 --> 00:26:49,541 with, you know, the issues that he deals with mentally, 667 00:26:49,641 --> 00:26:50,875 -et cetera. -Mm-hmm. 668 00:26:50,975 --> 00:26:52,911 I-I found that particularly interesting 669 00:26:53,011 --> 00:26:55,680 because I felt it cloudies a subject 670 00:26:55,780 --> 00:26:57,181 that is already quite complicated, 671 00:26:57,282 --> 00:26:58,650 and yet because of that, 672 00:26:58,750 --> 00:27:00,518 -it deserves to be part of the conversation. -Mm-hmm. 673 00:27:00,618 --> 00:27:02,453 Why did you feel it necessary to say, 674 00:27:02,554 --> 00:27:05,256 "Hey, this is the person who abused me, 675 00:27:05,356 --> 00:27:07,659 "and this person also suffered abuse, 676 00:27:07,759 --> 00:27:09,294 and this person is also going through things"? 677 00:27:09,394 --> 00:27:11,529 Why do that knowing that it would then, 678 00:27:11,629 --> 00:27:13,865 you know, almost cloud some people's judgment 679 00:27:13,965 --> 00:27:15,533 in, like, who's guilty or who's not 680 00:27:15,633 --> 00:27:17,835 or even... or even who's accountable sometimes? 681 00:27:17,936 --> 00:27:19,704 Of course. And-and that's... 682 00:27:19,804 --> 00:27:23,675 Uh, it-it can definitely get complicated in that way, 683 00:27:23,775 --> 00:27:26,344 because I-I do believe in accountability 684 00:27:26,444 --> 00:27:29,814 and healing and-and reform, and I think there is a... 685 00:27:29,914 --> 00:27:31,950 a-a time and a space for that. 686 00:27:32,083 --> 00:27:34,586 And I think we need to leave more space for accountability. 687 00:27:34,686 --> 00:27:36,087 Otherwise, nobody's gonna be accountable. 688 00:27:36,187 --> 00:27:40,091 -Right. -Um, but, uh, I-I just knew 689 00:27:40,158 --> 00:27:41,759 we're never gonna get to the root of this problem 690 00:27:41,859 --> 00:27:45,763 if-if we don't go into the background, 691 00:27:45,864 --> 00:27:48,733 um... and-and the root and the cause, 692 00:27:48,833 --> 00:27:51,536 because violence in the home 693 00:27:51,636 --> 00:27:55,540 is-is the root of so many issues in this country, 694 00:27:55,640 --> 00:27:58,109 in the world, it bleeds into almost 695 00:27:58,209 --> 00:28:00,778 every area of society, and we don't even realize it. 696 00:28:00,879 --> 00:28:05,116 Um, and violence begets violence. It's-- it is a cycle. 697 00:28:05,183 --> 00:28:08,553 Um... And, uh, there are people 698 00:28:08,653 --> 00:28:10,855 that can stop the cycle. 699 00:28:10,955 --> 00:28:14,292 Um, and there are some people I feel-- 700 00:28:14,392 --> 00:28:16,427 like Brian-- that don't want help. 701 00:28:16,527 --> 00:28:18,296 And he's had every opportunity, 702 00:28:18,396 --> 00:28:21,065 -he's had so many people try. -Mm. 703 00:28:21,132 --> 00:28:24,736 Um, and he has-he has refused it every time. 704 00:28:24,836 --> 00:28:27,238 Um, and, uh, 705 00:28:27,338 --> 00:28:30,408 once... I mean, I don't know how much I can say. 706 00:28:30,508 --> 00:28:34,112 But there, you know, there-there have been allegations 707 00:28:34,212 --> 00:28:35,680 and, uh, stories that have come out 708 00:28:35,780 --> 00:28:37,682 on the-on the Internet that involve minors. 709 00:28:37,782 --> 00:28:40,485 And... you got to draw the line somewhere. 710 00:28:40,585 --> 00:28:43,354 And-and with children... 711 00:28:43,454 --> 00:28:46,090 I-I have to draw the line there. 712 00:28:46,157 --> 00:28:49,360 Um... and, uh, 713 00:28:49,460 --> 00:28:52,664 I don't believe that he will stop 714 00:28:52,764 --> 00:28:54,098 until he is stopped, and sometimes 715 00:28:54,132 --> 00:28:56,868 the greatest act of love is stopping that person 716 00:28:56,968 --> 00:28:58,770 from hurting themselves or hurting anybody else. 717 00:28:58,870 --> 00:29:02,473 We in society often say, we go, "Well, why didn't do you 718 00:29:02,574 --> 00:29:04,008 do it sooner? Why didn't you come forward sooner?" 719 00:29:04,108 --> 00:29:06,311 And-and so, I would love to know from you 720 00:29:06,411 --> 00:29:07,812 how time-- how you think 721 00:29:07,912 --> 00:29:11,349 -time affects the-the mental state, -Mm-hmm. 722 00:29:11,449 --> 00:29:13,117 the relationship and the entire world 723 00:29:13,184 --> 00:29:15,587 of somebody who's experienced sexual abuse. 724 00:29:15,687 --> 00:29:19,123 People underestimate the... 725 00:29:19,224 --> 00:29:22,160 the power of that kind of trauma 726 00:29:22,260 --> 00:29:24,295 and what it does to your body and to your brain. 727 00:29:24,395 --> 00:29:27,098 And there's so many studies to back this up. 728 00:29:27,198 --> 00:29:30,068 And-and this is what the laws do not reflect. 729 00:29:30,168 --> 00:29:31,903 Is the effects of trauma on the brain. 730 00:29:32,070 --> 00:29:34,305 And a lot of people, when they're-- 731 00:29:34,405 --> 00:29:35,673 think they know how they're gonna respond 732 00:29:35,773 --> 00:29:37,175 to a situation like that, until you're in 733 00:29:37,275 --> 00:29:39,978 a life-threatening situation and you're doing risk assessment 734 00:29:40,078 --> 00:29:43,114 and are you in survival mode, and you're gonna 735 00:29:43,214 --> 00:29:45,083 have that fight, flight or freeze response-- 736 00:29:45,183 --> 00:29:47,685 sometimes all three-- um, 737 00:29:47,785 --> 00:29:49,420 you're just trying to survive that moment 738 00:29:49,520 --> 00:29:51,823 and get the least amount of damage, you know? 739 00:29:51,923 --> 00:29:55,159 And, uh, and then, once you're out, again, 740 00:29:55,260 --> 00:29:59,430 like I said, you-you... your-your body and your brain 741 00:29:59,531 --> 00:30:02,634 -do back flips to protect you from the pain. -Mm. 742 00:30:02,734 --> 00:30:05,370 And-and that's how denial comes into play. 743 00:30:05,470 --> 00:30:07,839 That's how, you know, addiction comes into play. 744 00:30:07,939 --> 00:30:09,641 Bad coping mechanisms, 'cause are you just 745 00:30:09,741 --> 00:30:12,710 kind of buried, because to-to face it, 746 00:30:12,810 --> 00:30:16,514 to-to face the reality is-is almost unbearable. 747 00:30:16,614 --> 00:30:19,951 I think, on average, it takes people seven to ten years 748 00:30:20,051 --> 00:30:23,354 to be able to process, understand, 749 00:30:23,454 --> 00:30:26,925 heal, and be able to put things in chronological order. 750 00:30:27,058 --> 00:30:29,327 The laws, I mean, you know... (stammers) 751 00:30:29,427 --> 00:30:31,062 In California, the statute of limitations 752 00:30:31,095 --> 00:30:33,798 was one to three years when we started, uh, 753 00:30:33,898 --> 00:30:35,400 advocating for the Phoenix Act. 754 00:30:35,500 --> 00:30:37,535 And, you know, o... (chuckles) 755 00:30:37,635 --> 00:30:39,070 one to three years 756 00:30:39,137 --> 00:30:40,805 -is nothing to a survivor... -Yeah, it's nowhere near. Yeah. 757 00:30:40,905 --> 00:30:42,840 ...or-or to somebody that has experienced 758 00:30:42,941 --> 00:30:44,275 not just one incidence of trauma, 759 00:30:44,375 --> 00:30:45,944 which is... 760 00:30:46,077 --> 00:30:48,179 You know, any act of trauma is-is terrible. 761 00:30:48,279 --> 00:30:52,550 But, you know, i-imagine 24/7 for four years. 762 00:30:52,650 --> 00:30:54,219 The damage that that would do on somebody's psyche 763 00:30:54,319 --> 00:30:55,386 -and self-esteem. -Right. 764 00:30:55,486 --> 00:30:57,855 And, um, with somebody like him, 765 00:30:57,956 --> 00:31:00,692 who was very calculated in brainwashing, 766 00:31:00,792 --> 00:31:02,293 in-in isolation, 767 00:31:02,393 --> 00:31:06,364 um, it-it very much operates like a cult 768 00:31:06,464 --> 00:31:08,333 in that, when you're in it, 769 00:31:08,433 --> 00:31:10,335 you can't see the forest for the-- through the trees. 770 00:31:10,435 --> 00:31:12,370 Up is down, down is up. 771 00:31:12,470 --> 00:31:14,706 It's-it's you two against the world. 772 00:31:14,806 --> 00:31:17,809 And it is a secret that nobody will ever be able to understand, 773 00:31:17,909 --> 00:31:20,144 and you feel like you're a part of something, you know? 774 00:31:20,245 --> 00:31:23,548 Um, and you got to... you got to break free of that illusion. 775 00:31:23,648 --> 00:31:25,450 And-and it-it takes time. 776 00:31:25,550 --> 00:31:27,852 It takes time and work and therapy. 777 00:31:27,952 --> 00:31:29,754 I cannot stress that enough. 778 00:31:29,854 --> 00:31:33,491 Um, but, you know, again, I-I had those resources, 779 00:31:33,591 --> 00:31:35,059 I have a platform, I have privilege. 780 00:31:35,159 --> 00:31:36,294 So... 781 00:31:36,394 --> 00:31:38,096 it really breaks my heart to think of people 782 00:31:38,196 --> 00:31:40,365 that don't have access to the things that I've had access to 783 00:31:40,465 --> 00:31:42,066 and-and how alone they must feel, 784 00:31:42,100 --> 00:31:44,536 and that really is what-what drives me. 785 00:31:44,636 --> 00:31:46,738 Well, as I said at the beginning of the conversation, 786 00:31:46,838 --> 00:31:48,606 it's one of the hardest conversations to have, 787 00:31:48,706 --> 00:31:50,074 I think, because it makes us question 788 00:31:50,174 --> 00:31:52,076 -a lot of what we've allowed in society... -Of course. 789 00:31:52,110 --> 00:31:54,078 ...who we are, who we were, and who we hope to be. 790 00:31:54,112 --> 00:31:56,781 And, um, yeah, thank you for joining us on the show. 791 00:31:56,881 --> 00:31:58,449 And I encourage everybody to watch the documentary 792 00:31:58,550 --> 00:31:59,784 and hear your side of the story. 793 00:31:59,884 --> 00:32:02,353 -Thank you. (chuckles softly) -Thank you so much. 794 00:32:02,453 --> 00:32:04,889 The two-part HBO documentary Phoenix Rising 795 00:32:04,989 --> 00:32:07,792 airs March 15 and 16 on HBO 796 00:32:07,892 --> 00:32:09,494 and can be streamed on HBO Max. 797 00:32:09,594 --> 00:32:10,662 We're gonna take a quick break, 798 00:32:10,762 --> 00:32:12,931 but we'll be right back after this. 799 00:32:15,799 --> 00:32:16,734 Well, that's our show for tonight. But before we go, 800 00:32:16,834 --> 00:32:19,036 please consider supporting Step Up. 801 00:32:19,136 --> 00:32:21,305 They're an organization that provides mentors 802 00:32:21,405 --> 00:32:23,640 for young women to nurture their personal 803 00:32:23,741 --> 00:32:25,275 and professional growth. 804 00:32:25,376 --> 00:32:27,177 So if you can support their work 805 00:32:27,277 --> 00:32:29,847 with after-school and weekend mentorship programs, 806 00:32:29,947 --> 00:32:32,082 then please donate at the link below. 807 00:32:32,182 --> 00:32:35,285 Until tomorrow, stay safe out there, get your vaccine, 808 00:32:35,386 --> 00:32:39,623 and, remember, if Tom Brady inspired you to quit your job, 809 00:32:39,723 --> 00:32:42,493 well, you better start begging your boss to take you back. 810 00:32:42,593 --> 00:32:45,195 Now here it is, Your Moment of Zen. 811 00:32:45,295 --> 00:32:46,563 NEWSMAN: It is one of those things. 812 00:32:46,663 --> 00:32:47,865 You know, law enforcement, 813 00:32:47,965 --> 00:32:50,267 they have to-- they have to keep these people safe. 814 00:32:50,367 --> 00:32:52,202 And-and then-- You can see it right there. 815 00:32:52,302 --> 00:32:54,505 The suspect trying to get into somebody's property 816 00:32:54,605 --> 00:32:56,006 or still trying to hide 817 00:32:56,106 --> 00:32:59,443 but, uh, doing a very, very poor job of it right there. 818 00:32:59,543 --> 00:33:00,978 LAPD coming to a stop. 819 00:33:01,078 --> 00:33:03,414 Oh, come on, guys! He's right there! 820 00:33:03,514 --> 00:33:06,450 Our pilot today talking on O2, trying to tell the officers 821 00:33:06,550 --> 00:33:08,919 that this suspect is right there. 822 00:33:09,019 --> 00:33:11,622 And, a-a... and, again, you just saw that. 823 00:33:11,722 --> 00:33:14,425 Oh, my goodness, I just feel so bad for those officers 824 00:33:14,558 --> 00:33:15,759 making their way back now. 825 00:33:15,859 --> 00:33:17,561 It's the blue car. There we go. 826 00:33:17,594 --> 00:33:19,163 Keep coming around, Ange. Keep coming around. 827 00:33:19,263 --> 00:33:21,799 Keep coming around. That suspect-- There he goes. 828 00:33:21,899 --> 00:33:24,068 Some of those officers must be getting that information. 829 00:33:24,168 --> 00:33:25,636 There you go. There you go. 830 00:33:25,736 --> 00:33:28,238 And now that suspect's going into custody. Wow. 831 00:33:28,339 --> 00:33:29,773 -(newswoman gasps) -Wow. And... 832 00:33:29,873 --> 00:33:32,309 They haven't seen him yet. This is unbelievable. 833 00:33:32,409 --> 00:33:33,777 -There we go. -(groans) 834 00:33:33,877 --> 00:33:35,913 NEWSMAN: (sighs) Oh, my gosh. 835 00:33:36,914 --> 00:33:38,682 Sorry about that.