Our journey as humans is very inspiring,
but not to, like, animals.
Like, we're like, "Look how far we've come."
And every animal on the planet is like,
"These mother(bleep).
"These guys are j... they chop down our houses,
"and they-they kill us to wear us, dawg.
This is... Wear us."
"Wh-What do you mean, wear-wear us?"
"Yo, they're gonna take your-your back,
and they're gonna put it on their back."
"But what-what do they have on their back?"
"Nothing, clearly. You."
"Don't they have skin?"
"Nah. They... Well, they've got it,
"but it's, like, useless, apparently.
"I don't know what happened with their skin.
And so they're just gonna wear us."
These are the conversations animals are having about us
till this day.
Imagine chickens talking to each other.
"Yeah, you know what gives them good dreams
is, like, the feathers of our ancestors."
"What?"
"Yeah, they need to sleep on our dead bodies
for a good night's sleep."
"What?
Can they not make the pillows out of anything else?"
"They can. They can. But they don't like to."
"What were their other options?"
"Well, they used to use, uh, cotton
that some of them had picked. Yeah."
"Jesus, these people are monsters."
"I know. I know.
"Anyway, I'll-I'll chat to you later.
"I, uh, I've got to go turn into a bucket of pieces
that they're not gonna finish."
(clicks tongue) "See you later."
ANNOUNCER: Coming to you from the heart of Times Square
in New York City, the only city in America,
it's The Daily Show.
Tonight, bye-bye, Breyer,
how Congress is getting rich,
and Rick Glassman.
This is The Daily Show with Trevor Noah.
Hey! What's going on, everybody?
Welcome to The Daily Show. I'm Trevor Noah,
and joining me for today's headlines
is our very own Ronny Chieng.
-What's going on, Ronny? How you doing? -Hey, Trevor.
Good to see you again. Uh... (inhales)
Well, I-I'm okay,
but I got COVID, like, five weeks ago,
-and, uh... -Wow.
Yeah, it was... It was, uh, intense.
I felt really sick. I'm glad I recovered,
but I think I may have
some lingering, uh, headaches, brain fog.
And, uh, the worst part about COVID is, uh, afterwards,
I-I look at Machine Gun Kelly and Megan Fox news,
and I... I just feel nothing.
-Like, you've lost... -Yeah, just lost complete interest.
Like, I'll be scrolling, I'll see them, like,
biting each other's tongues or something,
and I'll be like, "I don't care about this."
And, you know, I just... I hope in a few months,
this goes away and I once again can enjoy
Megan Kelly, Machine Gun Fox news.
I... You see, that's part of the thing.
-It's happening to you now. -Yeah.
-You're even mixing up their... -Oh, did I just mix it up?
-Oh, damn. Well... -I'm sorry, man.
It's all right. You know. -Geez, Ronny.
-Well, I'm glad... -It could be worse. It could be worse.
It could be worse. I'm glad are you getting better,
and I hope that you care about them again one day.
-Thank you, Roy. -(exhales) Well, thanks for being here.
All right, let's jump straight into today's headlines.
♪ ♪
We kick things off with major news
out of the Supreme Court.
Yes, the second most powerful court in the United States
right after Judge Judy.
Out of all the justices on the Supreme Court,
the oldest one is Stephen Breyer.
And you know how it goes with old Supreme Court justices.
Eventually, whether they like it or not,
they go and meet the one true judge.
(kisses)
So, Democrats have been relentlessly pestering Breyer
to step down so that they can replace him
before Mitch McConnell comes back into power
and makes a rule that all Supreme Court justices
have to have been platinum QAnon members in the past.
And today, Breyer finally made the Democrats' dreams come true.
Breaking news. A bombshell announcement
out of the U.S. Supreme Court reverberating
across the nation's legal and political landscape.
CNN has learned that Justice Stephen Breyer
plans to retire.
NEWSMAN: Breyer is 83 years old,
and he has resisted calls to retire
from liberals who want President Joe Biden
to have a Supreme Court nomination slot
that he can use this year.
Apparently, Breyer has decided, uh, to move forward
with that retirement now,
and it sets up a political battle here
for President Biden, who will have the opportunity
to nominate a Supreme Court justice as a result.
Justice Stephen Breyer, the leading liberal
on the court, he will retire.
We're still not exactly sure of the timeline,
but, presumably, not until the end of this term,
which ends, usually, at the end of June.
This is big, y'all. Justice Breyer is retiring.
Yeah. Probably to focus more
on his ice cream brand. I don't know.
But, honestly, no one-- no one should be surprised
by this news, right?
It probably isn't fun being hounded all day
by people screaming at you to retire.
I mean, imagine it. Think about it. Everywhere this guy goes,
people are telling him he should be retiring.
He's probably in line at the grocery store
and people are like, "Retire, bitch!"
He's at Starbucks. The name on the cup is Retire Bitch.
He's at the synagogue and the rabbi is like,
"Baruch ata, retire, bitch."
And right now, a lot of Democrats are relieved.
But I don't know, people.
I feel like the only winner here is gonna be Mitch McConnell.
Maybe I'm just scarred.
Yeah. Because even though the Republicans
don't control the Senate, don't be shocked,
don't be shocked when Mitch still makes it happen.
He's just gonna come out like,
"Muh, it's a longstanding Senate tradition
"that we cannot confirm a Supreme Court justice
"in a year where there's a new season of Ozark on Netflix.
"Muh.
"We all got to watch it first and then process what happened.
That show is crazy. Shit. Muh."
Now, as to the speculation about who will replace Breyer,
President Biden has already promised
that, if he gets the chance,
he's going to nominate a Black woman
to the Supreme Court.
Which, you got to admit, that's gonna be
a really powerful moment.
You know? He's giving that speech.
It's gonna be really special.
Until he says that she's "the finest Negro judge
"of the Negro Leagues... (muttering)
"Come on, man.
Come on, man."
Um, well, you know, Trevor,
if we're gonna go racial with the Supreme Court judge thing,
uh, I just want to point out there that, uh,
Asian Americans have a really strong history
of jurisprudence in America. I mean...
O.J. Simpson trial.
That was us, man. Judge Ito.
GOAT.
He did that stuff, if you liked that outcome.
Also, I don't know how many times I have to say this
on the show, but...
I... have a law degree.
And, also,
I am extremely judgy.
You know what I mean? I judge everything.
Like, from the moment I wake up, I'm judging everyone.
I'm judging you right now.
Like your suit, that's-- what is that, polka dots?
That looks like shit.
-(laughter) -I'd be perfect for this role.
You know what I'm saying? Also, in America,
there's only two jobs with lifetime appointments--
that's the host of Price is Right
and Supreme Court judge,
which means you can't get fired, Trevor.
Do you know how much shit I would talk
if I couldn't get fired?
-No, no, tell me, Ronny. -I would talk so much shit.
-Yeah? -I would be so much more free to express myself.
And isn't that what being America is about?
Being free?
Yeah. I would love to know all the things
you have to say about me when you're free.
I mean, considering what you say about me when you're...
-held back. -Exactly.
So let's work to make this happen.
Biden, I'm available.
I'd like to announce my candidacy
for Supreme Court of the United States.
Vote for me on Twitter.
Thank you, Ronny. And that's a powerful statement.
It's not polka dots. They're little, like...
squiggly things.
Okay, they look like shit.
Anyway, let's move on
to the big entertainment story everyone's talking about today.
It's about Disney movies,
which everyone loves, right?
We all love Disney movies, especially the classics.
They're the reason that we all believe in true love
and all hate our stepmothers.
And Disney loves remaking those films,
because Disney really understands the value of money.
But as the originals get remade,
people start to notice things
that don't quite work in the modern era,
as one famous actor just pointed out.
NEWSWOMAN: Walt Disney Studios on the defensive
following harsh criticism
by Emmy-winning actor Peter Dinklage
over the upcoming live-action adaptation
of the 1937 Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs
starring West Side Story actress Rachel Zegler.
Yeah.
Still Snow white, yeah.
Oh, a backward... (laughs)
NEWSWOMAN: Disney releasing a statement, responding
to the backlash, writing in part...
Ooh, boy.
All right, let me start by saying this.
From the beginning, I am not a dwarf,
so if Peter Dinklage says that this is a problem,
I'm not going to say that he's wrong.
Because I've never watched Snow White
and found the dwarves offensive, right?
But I do understand what he's talking about.
I genuinely do.
Because if that movie was called Snow White and the Seven Blacks,
I mean, that would be weird.
And you could tell me,
"Oh, Trevor, no, the Blacks are actually the heroes.
It's still a... it's-it's a great story."
Let me tell you something. Yo, man,
that's still a white lady and her friendly Blacks.
It still set off my Spidey sense.
And look, I wish...
I wish Disney the best of luck in this thing.
Personally, I wouldn't touch the story with a ten-foot pole.
Yeah, because it's still seven dwarves living in the forest.
And I don't think it's a great idea.
And that's not even the biggest issue of all.
Because don't forget, the whole story revolves
around a woman being drugged, and then some dude comes
and kisses her without her consent.
And I know Bill Cosby is now available for the role,
but that's not the point.
I'm just saying this thing is, uh, you know?
Yeah, well, look, Trevor, can we just give Disney a chance,
and let's judge the movie after it gets made?
I mean, they've... Disney has had a good history lately
of, like, updating things
and making characters three-dimensional
and bad guys good, right? Like, look at Cruella.
-Right? From 101 Dalmatians. -Yeah. Yeah. Okay.
Literally, "the cruel devil" is her name,
and she kills puppies.
And then, they put Emma Stone in there in the prequel.
-It turns out some puppies killed her mom. -Yeah.
And then you go, "Oh, now I know why you were killing puppies
in the second thing," so I'm just saying, give them a chance.
Anyway, let's talk about Joe Rogan,
the king of podcasts
and Aaron Rodgers' personal physician.
Whatever you think about him,
Rogan is one of the most influential voices
in America right now,
because 11 million people listen to his show.
11 million people. Yeah.
And some of what they hear is a little suspect, right?
You know, whether it's misinformation about COVID,
or whatever was happening here.
-What did Michael Eric Dyson call you? -Prejudiced.
-A mean, angry, white man? -Mean and... mean, yeah.
-And a mean, angry, white man. Yeah. -Hilarious.
-Yeah, yeah. Yeah. -You're not mean at all.
-It's, uh... -I am white.
-Actually, that's a lie, too. -(laughing)
I'm kind of tan, and he was actually not Black.
-He was sort of... -If you're tan, what the (bleep) am I?
Black and white thing is so strange because the shades
-are so... -Yeah, it's like tan and brown.
There's such a spectrum of shades of people.
Unless you're talking to someone who is, like, 100% African
from the darkest place
where they're not wearing any clothes all day,
and they've developed all that melanin to protect themselves
from the sun, you know, even the term "Black" is weird.
Oh, my God.
I'm not Black.
Joe Rogan's right. I'm like a caramel mocha Frappuccino.
This... Yo, this changes everything!
This changes everything!
(footsteps running)
(siren blaring)
The police said I'm Black.
But yeah, apparently Joe Rogan really wants to know
why they say "Black people"
if they're not the color of a sharpie.
And this actually is a common question.
Yeah. In fact, when my brother was five years old,
he asked me the exact same thing.
And I know a lot of people are upset about this,
but look at the upside: at least Joe Rogan
wasn't talking about vaccines.
So that is a step in the right direction, right?
Let's acknowledge that.
You know? What was weird about this whole thing
was Rogan's guest, though, Jordan Peterson saying that
his skin is actually tan.
My man, you're not tan.
Like, that guy is... that's white.
If anyone buys skin tanner
and they end up looking like Jordan Peterson,
they should sue the company.
Have you seen his skin color?
Like, he could be Snow White.
The thing that these guys seem to be ignoring
is that Black people didn't call themselves Black.
You understand that, right?
It's not like Black people were like, "We're Black."
No, in Africa, we have tribes, we have cultures--
Zulu, Xhosa, Baganda, Igbo,
Wakandans.
But then white people got there, and they're like:
"Wow, there's a lot of Black people here.
Lot of Black people."
Yeah, then in America, they invented a rule
that if you had one drop of Black blood in you,
that makes you Black.
Which defined how you were treated by the government
and by society.
Even vampires wouldn't bite you.
Look, I thirst for their blood,
but I'm applying for a mortgage. I can't risk it.
You know what, Trevor? I mean, look,
Joe is right, man.
I got to agree with him on this one.
Race is fluid.
Like, what is race?
Like, one time I put on, like, a Korean charcoal face mask,
and I felt kind of Asian until I put it on,
and then I realized it was blackface,
and then I started thinking: Hey, man,
I can really empathize with the struggle.
And as soon as I said that out loud,
I got cancelled, which made me feel white,
I had to start from the bottom of showbiz again,
which made me feel Asian, so right there I had, like,
five different racial experiences
in the course of, like, ten minutes, all right?
And so, like, what is race?
I'm gonna chalk this up to the COVID.
(stammering): Uh... whatever, man.
I'm just saying, race is fluid, man.
I feel you there, Ronny.
All right, that's it for the headlines.
Don't go away, because when we come back,
we're gonna tell you how to get rich.
You don't want to miss it.
Welcome back to The Daily Show.
Let's talk about Congress.
It's the number one tourist destination
for people trying to hang Mike Pence.
Now, you may not know this, but most members of Congress
are forced to scrape by
on a measly $200,000-a-year salary,
which, when you think about it,
is barely enough to afford a good prostitute.
So, naturally, they need to supplement their income
by investing in the stock market.
It's a natural thing.
But if you can believe it,
there's now a new movement in Congress
to stop members from trading stocks altogether.
It's rare these days for this divided Congress
to agree on absolutely anything,
but there may be one issue.
It has the likes of Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez
and Kevin McCarthy on the same side.
They're both among members of Congress
pushing for new restrictions
on how lawmakers trade stocks.
NEWSWOMAN: Democratic Senator Jon Ossoff
just released a bill tonight that would force lawmakers
to put their assets into a blind trust
or pay a fine of their entire salary.
GOP Senator Josh Hawley is working on a version, too,
and in the House, there's already a bipartisan bill
called the TRUST in Congress Act.
NEWSMAN: This comes only a few weeks
after House Speaker Nancy Pelosi doubled down
on members' right to invest in the stock market.
No, I don't... No to the second one.
This is a free market, and people...
We're a free market economy.
They should be able to participate in that.
Okay, well, uh, first of all, I can't believe there's an issue
that AOC and Kevin McCarthy agree on.
Those people don't agree on anything
except that those kids on Euphoria are way too horny.
Don't you guys have homework?
I'm pretty sure you can't put "cocaine"
on a college application.
And, by the way, this bill is quite a move
for a new senator like Jon Ossoff.
Think about it. The guy just got to the Senate,
and he's already coming after the wallets of his coworkers?
It's like showing up to prison on your first day
and being like, "Hey, Warden,
I think these guys are using spoons to dig something."
But the question still is why do so many representatives
from across the political spectrum
want to ban Congress from trading stocks?
And why is Nancy Pelosi against that?
Well, let's find out in another installment
of If You Don't Know, Now You Know.
♪ ♪
The first thing to know is that historically,
Congress has had no restrictions when it comes to trading stocks.
For most of American history,
insider trading laws that affected CEOs
didn't apply to members of Congress.
So, if Thomas Edison testified behind closed doors,
senators could just call up their broker going,
"Dump all my shares in candles.
That shit's over, I tell you."
You see, they could use all of this advanced secret knowledge
to make money for themselves.
And it was illegal for everyone else to do it,
but for some reason, Congress could.
I mean, it may have something to do with the fact
they were making the laws. Who knows?
So it's no surprise that members of Congress
have been really good
at timing the stock market.
Economists have studied the portfolios
of members of Congress and find
they systematically outperform the stock market.
NEWSMAN: A study of data from the 1990s showed
senators' trades outperformed the market by 12% per year.
That crushes investment guru Warren Buffett,
who only managed to beat the market by 2.5% that decade.
NEWSMAN 2: The 2008 financial crisis turned out to be
a free-for-all for insider trading on Capitol Hill.
According to a Washington Post exposé,
35 members cashed out on information
they received from meetings
with Treasury Secretary Hank Paulson and others.
NEWSMAN 3: One of those attending
was Alabama Representative Spencer Bachus.
While Congressman Bachus was publicly trying
to keep the economy from cratering,
he was privately betting that it would,
buying option funds that would go up in value
if the market went down.
He would make a variety of trades and profit
at a time when most Americans were losing their shirts.
Now, look, I know seeing politicians profit off
of an economic meltdown might make you angry,
but-- don't forget-- they suffered, too.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to pretend to be sad
when you're making bank?
They had to give speeches
while fighting the urge to do the Dougie live on camera.
And, obviously, something fishy is going on
when members of Congress are doing better
in the stock market than Warren Buffett!
I mean, it definitely makes those fundraising emails
even more annoying.
"I need five dollars by midnight."
Bitch, go talk to your E-Trade!
what are you talking to me for?
I mean, I don't know, maybe I'm just jealous.
Maybe I'm just jealous. 'Cause, members of Congress,
they get all the coolest secrets, you know?
Which stocks to buy.
Who the CIA is killing.
Where they're keeping the aliens.
Every other workplace has stupid secrets.
Like, my coolest secret right now at the show
is that our producer Shelley is pregnant
and she's gonna surprise her husband on Valentine's Day.
(singsongy): Boring.
But when people found out
about congressmen making money off of the financial crash,
there was a big enough outcry
that Congress was finally shamed into regulating themselves.
They passed the STOCK Act,
which banned members of Congress
from trading stocks based on private information
and forced them to publicly disclose
all their trades within 45 days.
But it turns out that legislation
is like most members of Congress before bed--
completely toothless.
It is certainly illegal for members of Congress
to partake in insider trading.
Uh, proving that, uh, is very difficult.
If you want to nail 'em on insider trading, good luck.
You could essentially say, "Listen,
"I was reasonably told by my broker I should sell
or I heard similar stuff from a third party."
DoJ has yet to successfully convict
an elected member of Congress based on this law.
Even if the law is followed,
it barely has any teeth.
Nearly 50 lawmakers, both Republicans and Democrats,
and nearly 200 of their staffers
have repeatedly violated the STOCK Act
with almost no consequences.
You can make tens of millions of dollars
with privileged information, and what's the penalty
for failing to report these purchases?
It's a joke. It's as low as $200.
Ooh. $200 is the penalty?
I mean, look, I'm-I'm no math expert,
but if I have to pay a $200 fine
to make a trade that earns me millions of dollars,
I feel like I'm coming out ahead.
Like, I'm making a thousand dollars in profit
at least, right?
$200 is not a penalty, people.
That's the chip you throw to the dealer
after you win the poker tournament.
Hell, you lose $200
just carrying the million dollars to the bank.
So it turns it out that the STOCK Act is just another one
of those laws that no one enforces, you know?
Like jaywalking or pushing all the buttons in an elevator.
And don't forget, it's really hard to prove insider trading.
You can just say you weren't even paying attention
during that private briefing that you got,
which, as a member of Congress,
is actually a very believable alibi.
So the STOCK Act really did nothing to stop insider trading.
Like, remember, remember how those congressmen
sold those stocks before the crash in 2008?
Well, the same thing happened again a couple of years ago
before COVID hit.
Yeah, multiple senators dumped their stocks
after intelligence officials told them
in a private briefing that all
of those coughing people in China were about
to tank the world economy, and still, no one got punished.
Which is why, even after the STOCK Act,
members of Congress continued to do so well
that some of them have their own financial groupies.
And no one has more than Nancy Pelosi.
Some TikTokers are getting stock market ideas
by tracking members of Congress,
and one of their favorites is House Speaker Nancy Pelosi.
Shout outs to Nancy Pelosi, the stock market's biggest whale.
Apparently, she's decided to go very heavy in tech stocks.
I'm gonna show you guys which ones she bought.
MAN 3: The queen of investing just spent $300,000
on this one stock.
So I think I'll be picking up a couple shares on Monday.
This stock's about to go crazy because Nancy Pelosi bought it.
Yeah, that's right. Nancy Pelosi is a star on TikTok.
And she didn't need to steal any Black people's dance moves
to do it. That's amazing.
In fact, I almost respect Pelosi's hustle.
She's 81 years old.
Most of her friends are probably playing
the nickel stocks right now, but she Knows
that it doesn't matter if it's casinos or Wall Street.
The house always wins, baby.
Now, has Pelosi been so successful
because of inside information?
There there's no way to know.
But what's clear is that just being a member
of Congress means that you'll probably know about
the bad stuff that will crash a stock before the rest of us.
Yeah. Whether it's a housing bubble
or Elon Musk hosting SNL.
And until members of Congress are banned from trading stocks,
Congress will keep having an edge over regular people.
And it'll all be completely legal
or, at the very least, so unenforceable
that it's legal by default.
Which, you gotta admit, is such a smooth way
to do corruption. You know?
In fact, it's such a smooth way that leaders in
other parts of the world are starting to take notice.
Good.
(groans)
Oh!
Aw...
(cheering, laughing)
All right, when we come back,
I will be talking to the hilarious Rick Glassman
about a show that combines Autism and comedy.
What? Stay tuned.
Welcome back to The Daily Show.
My guest tonight is comedian and actor Rick Glassman.
He's here to talk about his new series
that follows a trio of roommates on the autism spectrum
as they navigate life, work and pursuing love.
Is it obvious to everyone that I'm not normal?
Am I not passing?
I think you're normal.
Do I have to talk about it with people now?
-What if I don't want to? -Well, then don't.
-I mean, it's entirely up to you. -I don't want to.
Okay, then don't.
I'm taking Ewatomi on a date, and I need it to go perfect.
She needs to see that I can be normal.
I think you just got to be yourself, Jack.
Did you not hear a word I just said?
Okay, listen.
For what it's worth,
I think you are such a beautiful person
that you shouldn't have to hide who you are.
That makes me want to throw up.
(laughing)
Oh, man. Rick Glassman, welcome to The Daily Show.
-Thanks for having me. -Um, this is a really fun show.
When people tell you about a show and they go,
"This show is going to be about these people,"
you-you immediately think a few things.
Doesn't matter who the people are.
So, they go like, "This is going to be a Black show.
"This is going to be a show about Africans.
This is going to be a show about Europeans."
You know what I mean? "This is gonna be a show about autism."
-Yeah. -You go like, "Oh, what does that mean?"
And then you watch the show, and you go like,
"The people in the show
"just happen to be dealing with autism.
It's a show. It's a story."
Incidentally, I thought our show was gonna be a Black show
-until it came out. -(laughing)
Um, and it's funny that you bring that up as an example.
Um, yeah, it was a... it was a pleasure to-to do this.
Uh, I was diagnosed with autism five years ago.
-Okay. -And when I first found out,
it was like a superpower. I was so excited.
All these obstacles that I had in my life that were unrelated,
patterns kind of started showing themselves,
and I was like, "Oh, my God, this makes so much sense."
And I... And I was reading up on it,
and I found all these tools
that I-I never developed, and I was so excited.
And-and as I began to tell my friends,
some people would be like, "Yeah, that makes sense"
and some people would tell me, "That's not what autism is."
And I got in a really bad depression
for a little over a year 'cause this identity
that I wanted to take on,
I-I didn't understand how to explain.
-Wow, that's fascinating. -Does that make sense?
-Yeah. Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. -Um...
That makes a lot of sense.
I'm learning new tools on how to speak to people
and I'm figuring stuff out.
Incidentally, this is my first... doing this,
a late-night show and an interview.
And when I booked the show, I was so nervous
about this moment, because I didn't want to be obligated
to be a spokesperson about a thing
that I was still learning about myself.
-Oh, man, that's deep. -And...
-Thank you. -That's really deep. No, for real.
But then I do the show and--
-I had one autistic friend before the show. -Okay.
I do the show and-- And there's a quote that I love.
It's Dr. Stephen Shore. He said if you've met one person
with autism, it means you've met one person with autism.
-I love that quote. -I love that, too,
'cause it made me feel like I don't have to explain...
who I am. I could just be it and...
I'm accepted or I'm not.
And, um, what I found is, is, once I got my diagnosis,
it did two things for me.
Internally, it allowed me to better communicate
-and teach people how to communicate with me. -Okay.
Uh, I would often say, "Listen, if you think I'm weird,
just tell me. I-I'm not gonna pick up on it."
You know? Just-- If-if I'm being annoying,
give me the benefit of the doubt and just say,
"Rick, slow down."
-But did anyone do that? -Oh, yeah.
You give 'em that-that opportunity,
it lets them feel safe,
so safe, that they don't even care.
"Oh, I--
Yeah, he told me about this. It's fine."
That's really interesting. I-I wonder if it's because,
in a way, being vulnerable with a person
makes them comfortable being vulnerable back with you.
So if you feel like somebody's being "weird,"
it's hard to say that because you don't know how you feel.
You don't-- you don't want to hurt the per--
You don't want to say the thing. It-- There is a vulnerability
in coming with telling somebody how you feel
about how they're making you feel.
And so if you put yourself in the position where you go, like,
"Hey, I'm actually the person that has an 'issue,'"
they then go, like, "Oh, they have other issues"
and then they just go, "I'm comfortable now."
What I've learned is-- at least this has helped,
-like, my self-worth is... -Okay.
Like you said, everyone has an issue.
But the issue, if you have a problem with me,
isn't the thing I'm doing.
-I mean, if I'm punching you, maybe. -Yes.
But it's the one little thing of the lack of connection.
-It's the communication. -Right.
And people don't want to say, "Why are you doing that?"
They'd rather just assume that, like, "Ah, okay."
Well, we try to be polite, and that's what...
-And that's not polite. -Yeah, but we think it's polite.
That's what I love about the show.
-You're meeting individuals, you're meeting people. -Yeah.
You know, the character you play is very different
to the characters that some of your castmates are playing.
And you're seeing different spectrums.
You're seeing different characters.
-You're seeing different obstacles in life. -Also...
And that's what I love about the show.
-But most importantly, can I say this? -Yes.
It's funny, and it's heartwarming.
People are telling a story about people who have to...
happen to have autism, and they have autism in real life.
There were characters that I met on set cause all the peop...
neurodiverse characters are played by neurodiverse actors.
-Okay. -Also, there was one actor who has autism
that played a neurotypical person.
I'm meeting most of these people
in the character they're playing,
-and that's... their autism. -Okay.
And then cut, and I meet a completely different person,
and it's... It was just so...
That's why I love that quote-- "You meet one person."
I mean, for every person I met on set,
I met two people with autism-- their representation of it,
-and then who they really were. -Damn.
And it made me feel so good.
And also, this is... This just happened a few days ago,
and I almost want to check it, but it's fine.
We won't say names. But there's a friend of mine
-who was an ex-girlfriend. -Okay.
Um... we're okay? We have time for this story?
-Yeah, yeah, yeah, go, go, go, go ahead, go ahead. -Um...
If we don't have time, I'll just cut it out.
-You'll leave it. Um... -(laughter)
A friend of mine, uh, I was dating,
and, um, I went to her hometown.
This was nine years ago, uh, pre-diagnosis.
And there were a couple of obstacles with the mom
-that I didn't know were happening. -Okay.
-All right. -Small example is,
I only had a few things to do laundry, and I was gonna do 'em,
but that's a waste. I'll...
She said, "I'll do all the laundry."
I'm like, "I'll-I'll... I'd like to do my own."
"Please, let me."
She was gonna wash it with these purple sheets
that I knew had never washed before, and I'm like,
"Well, that shirt... Have the sheets been washed before?"
She thinks I'm saying she doesn't know how to do laundry.
I'm thinking I'm just trying to save my shorts.
A lot of things kept happening.
Uh, then there was a moment where
my f... my girlfriend at the time was at her neighbor's,
so it was just the mom and me,
and we're making hot dogs,
and, great-- And I took a look,
and the hot dogs were purple, which was odd.
So I didn't want to ask anything,
-because I've had a lot of purple drama already. -Right.
So I look in the garbage to see, just,
had they expired, or what brand.
-Maybe it's a purple hot dog. A fun hot dog. -You never know.
You never know. You've got to ask.
And the-the wrappers were under some garbage,
which made me feel like,
-"Is she hiding the..." -Is she hiding the wrapper.
-"Is she hiding the wrapper? -On purpose or something, yeah.
-So now I'm... it expired four years ago. -The hot dogs?
The hot dogs expired four years ago. And they're hidden.
So now I'm-- I-I-- What do I do?
I don't know how to approach this, because I-I'm
recognizing something is a little odd from that day.
A little, yeah.
So I just said, "Hey, you know what,
I'm not gonna eat the hot dog."
I don't need to give the details.
I'm an adult. I get it. I can go around it, but
she said, "Why?" So I told her the hot dogs are purple.
And she said,
"Well, they're fine."
And I said, "They expired four years ago."
And she said, "They were in the freezer."
And I said, "Freezers aren't magic."
And we're getting-- In my head, I think we're just having
a fun debate on hot dogs, and she's like, "My daughter's gonna
marry this guy that's nuts about this stuff.
-Right. -Three days ago,
my friend calls me that her mom called her crying.
-"I'm on episode 7 of Rick's show." -Right.
"I get it. I'm s-- I get it."
And-and this idea of, like,
it lets people in on, "Oh, if you just realize that
these people are..." Not worse-- but just, say,
speak a different language.
-Yes. -Their hot dogs are a different color.
Right.
And it took watching a show of me playing a--
someone I'm not, for her to see who I was nine years ago.
And it just, like, let something loose that--
and this is maybe selfish or a corny thing to say--
but, like, I'm part of this show
that isn't just making people that I've never met be like,
"Oh, good, there's some representation of, like,
-the realities of some of this." -Yeah.
It happened to me.
And, like, you needed me to do this show... -(laughing)
...As We See It, on Amazon Prime, streaming now...
NOAH: (laughing)
...to have you understand that
I didn't want to eat a-a purple hot dog?
-Ah, Rick, this has been fun, man. -Yeah, this was awesome.
Thanks for making my day. And congratulations on the show.
-Thank you very much, man. -Good to have you on, man.
-I appreciate it. Cheers. -Really appreciate you.
NOAH: All episodes of As We See It are streaming right now
on Amazon Prime Video.
We're gonna take a quick break,
but we'll be right back after this.
Thank you, man. That was really a lot of fun. You made my day.
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Joe Biden might be calling you
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Now here it is, Your Moment of Zen.
♪ ♪
The impending national insurance tax hike hangs
like a guillotine while they eat cake.
This is nothing short of a crisis.
And the only route out,
the only route to restore public trust,
is for the prime minister to go.
Uh, well, Mr. Speaker, well, I-I-I don't know where
or who has been eating more cake. Uh...
-(laughing, cheering) -♪ ♪