1
00:00:01,435 --> 00:00:02,803
Stock market. Do you guys
celebrate the stock market?
2
00:00:02,903 --> 00:00:04,905
Yeah? Well, maybe not today.
3
00:00:05,005 --> 00:00:07,474
Shit was crashing, son.
4
00:00:07,574 --> 00:00:09,409
It was the wildest thing
I've ever seen.
5
00:00:09,510 --> 00:00:12,212
Just, like, red, red,
red, red, red, red, red.
6
00:00:12,312 --> 00:00:13,614
And then Bitcoin
was also crashing,
7
00:00:13,714 --> 00:00:15,048
which makes no sense to me
'cause people tell me
8
00:00:15,148 --> 00:00:16,383
Bitcoin is the thing
that's supposed
9
00:00:16,483 --> 00:00:17,818
to protect you
from the market, but then,
10
00:00:17,918 --> 00:00:20,721
Bitcoin goes with the market,
which makes no sense.
11
00:00:20,821 --> 00:00:23,790
At one point, I tried to check
my stock portfolio app,
12
00:00:23,891 --> 00:00:25,058
and my app was just like,
13
00:00:25,158 --> 00:00:26,960
"Ah, maybe go play
some Wordle, buddy."
14
00:00:27,060 --> 00:00:29,863
It's not a good day.
Actually, you know what?
15
00:00:29,963 --> 00:00:31,698
I feel bad
for all the Wall Street guys
16
00:00:31,798 --> 00:00:34,001
who jumped out
of the window at noon,
17
00:00:34,101 --> 00:00:36,069
because the market rebounded
18
00:00:36,170 --> 00:00:38,172
and it came up higher
at the end of the day.
19
00:00:38,272 --> 00:00:40,340
So now you know
there's at least, like, one guy
20
00:00:40,440 --> 00:00:42,943
who jumped out of the window,
and then it's like...
21
00:00:43,043 --> 00:00:44,678
Ah, man. You got to wait
'till the end of the day
22
00:00:44,778 --> 00:00:46,113
to kill yourself, fellas.
23
00:00:46,213 --> 00:00:48,048
You never know
what the market's gonna do.
24
00:00:48,148 --> 00:00:50,584
Imagine jumping out the window,
and you're like, "Aah!"
25
00:00:50,684 --> 00:00:51,985
And then, as you're falling
down the building,
26
00:00:52,085 --> 00:00:53,320
you're looking in the windows
of your building.
27
00:00:53,420 --> 00:00:54,421
Then you're seeing the thing
go up,
28
00:00:54,521 --> 00:00:56,290
and you're like, "Aah, no!
29
00:00:56,390 --> 00:00:59,226
No! I'm rich! I'm rich!"
30
00:01:00,260 --> 00:01:03,130
Yeah, but that happened today
on the stock market.
31
00:01:03,230 --> 00:01:05,265
And I think it's rebounded.
32
00:01:05,365 --> 00:01:08,135
They said it ended higher than
where it started in the day,
33
00:01:08,235 --> 00:01:10,938
which must be terrifying
for people's money.
34
00:01:11,071 --> 00:01:12,372
'Cause we always think
about this
35
00:01:12,472 --> 00:01:13,774
from our perspective as humans,
36
00:01:13,874 --> 00:01:15,475
but imagine
how your money feels.
37
00:01:15,576 --> 00:01:17,878
-(laughter) -The stock market
is like a rollercoaster
38
00:01:17,978 --> 00:01:20,080
for your money. You know
how terrifying that shit is?
39
00:01:20,147 --> 00:01:21,381
You just put your money
in there.
40
00:01:21,481 --> 00:01:22,783
You don't even think
about your money.
41
00:01:22,883 --> 00:01:25,085
Your money buys you food,
your money buys you shelter.
42
00:01:25,185 --> 00:01:26,486
And you don't give a shit.
You're just like,
43
00:01:26,587 --> 00:01:27,955
"Yeah, money,
go to the stock market."
44
00:01:28,088 --> 00:01:29,690
And then, your money is
just there terrified.
45
00:01:29,790 --> 00:01:33,627
"I'm down! I'm up!
I'm less! I'm more!"
46
00:01:33,727 --> 00:01:35,429
It's terrifying.
47
00:01:35,529 --> 00:01:37,798
I do that on purpose, though,
with my money.
48
00:01:37,898 --> 00:01:39,399
I put my money
in the stock market
49
00:01:39,499 --> 00:01:42,102
-just so that it appreciates my
bank account more. -(laughter)
50
00:01:42,202 --> 00:01:44,171
Then, when my money comes back
to my bank account, it's like,
51
00:01:44,271 --> 00:01:45,506
"Yo, Trev,
I'm never gonna talk shit
52
00:01:45,606 --> 00:01:46,974
about this ever again man."
53
00:01:47,107 --> 00:01:49,443
ANNOUNCER: Coming to you
from the heart of Times Square
54
00:01:49,543 --> 00:01:52,613
in New York City,
the only city in America, it's
55
00:01:52,713 --> 00:01:54,448
The Daily Show.
56
00:01:54,548 --> 00:01:57,951
Tonight--
the playoffs in overtime,
57
00:01:58,118 --> 00:02:00,554
TikTok's new villain
58
00:02:00,654 --> 00:02:03,090
and Jay Shetty!
59
00:02:03,190 --> 00:02:07,861
This is The Daily Show
with Trevor Noah!
60
00:02:07,961 --> 00:02:09,530
Hey!
What's going on, everybody?
61
00:02:09,630 --> 00:02:11,198
Welcome to The Daily Show.
I'm Trevor Noah.
62
00:02:11,298 --> 00:02:13,066
And joining me
for today's headlines
63
00:02:13,100 --> 00:02:15,936
is our very own Desi Lydic.
What's going on, Desi?
64
00:02:16,069 --> 00:02:18,305
-I've missed you.
-Thanks, Trevor. I missed you!
65
00:02:18,405 --> 00:02:21,141
-You know, I'm making the most
of my January. -Yeah?
66
00:02:21,241 --> 00:02:24,077
Yeah, yeah,
I'm doing dry January, actually,
67
00:02:24,178 --> 00:02:27,080
and I feel really great.
I feel really good.
68
00:02:27,147 --> 00:02:28,949
It's hard, but, you know,
I'm just, like,
69
00:02:29,082 --> 00:02:30,584
drinking a ton of water,
70
00:02:30,684 --> 00:02:33,587
dropping a little LSD every
night, taking the edge off.
71
00:02:33,687 --> 00:02:35,122
So far, I feel awesome.
72
00:02:35,222 --> 00:02:37,391
The whole point,
I think, is to...
73
00:02:37,491 --> 00:02:39,092
You know what?
Good for you, Desi.
74
00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:41,094
-Thank you. Thank you. I'm
really proud. -Yeah, congrats.
75
00:02:41,128 --> 00:02:42,663
Completely sober. All right,
76
00:02:42,763 --> 00:02:44,731
let's jump right
into today's headlines.
77
00:02:44,831 --> 00:02:47,267
♪ ♪
78
00:02:47,367 --> 00:02:49,503
We kick things off
with the NFL,
79
00:02:49,603 --> 00:02:53,240
the sport so good, we totally
forgot about the brain damage.
80
00:02:53,340 --> 00:02:56,443
Now, this weekend had
some absolutely crazy
81
00:02:56,543 --> 00:02:58,245
NFL playoff games.
82
00:02:58,345 --> 00:03:00,948
I mean, football hasn't seen
anything this exciting
83
00:03:01,048 --> 00:03:03,417
since that Super Bowl where
the Patriots accidentally
84
00:03:03,517 --> 00:03:05,519
took on a Puppy Bowl team.
You remember that?
85
00:03:05,619 --> 00:03:09,289
Yo, those puppies
got blown out! 52-17.
86
00:03:09,389 --> 00:03:11,425
And for all four games
this weekend,
87
00:03:11,525 --> 00:03:13,560
if you didn't stick around
'till the very end,
88
00:03:13,660 --> 00:03:16,129
you basically missed
the entire thing.
89
00:03:16,230 --> 00:03:19,833
There may have never been
another playoff weekend
90
00:03:19,933 --> 00:03:21,969
like the one
that you saw this weekend.
91
00:03:22,069 --> 00:03:25,339
The Kansas City Chiefs
and Buffalo Bills capped off one
92
00:03:25,439 --> 00:03:27,975
of the wildest weekends
of football of all time,
93
00:03:28,075 --> 00:03:31,945
with all four games decided
on the final play.
94
00:03:32,079 --> 00:03:33,780
NEWSMAN:
Remarkable!
95
00:03:33,881 --> 00:03:36,083
NEWSWOMAN: The Chiefs and Bills
scored a combined 25 points
96
00:03:36,183 --> 00:03:37,885
over the final two minutes
of regulation
97
00:03:37,985 --> 00:03:40,654
with the lead changing
three times.
98
00:03:40,754 --> 00:03:43,156
NEWSMAN:
He might be gone! He is!
99
00:03:43,257 --> 00:03:45,792
NEWSWOMAN: Buffalo went ahead
with 13 seconds remaining
100
00:03:45,893 --> 00:03:48,662
after Josh Allen's fourth
touchdown pass of the game,
101
00:03:48,762 --> 00:03:50,931
all of them to Gabriel Davis.
102
00:03:51,098 --> 00:03:53,534
NEWSMAN: Down to the middle of
the end zone! And there it is!
103
00:03:53,634 --> 00:03:56,170
NEWSWOMAN: But Patrick Mahomes
led the Chiefs down the field
104
00:03:56,270 --> 00:04:00,307
to set up a 49-yard field goal
to send the game into overtime.
105
00:04:00,407 --> 00:04:03,844
Kansas City won the coin
toss and marched downfield.
106
00:04:03,944 --> 00:04:05,512
Mahomes connected with Travis
Kelce
107
00:04:05,612 --> 00:04:09,049
to secure their spot in the
AFC championship game.
108
00:04:09,116 --> 00:04:10,617
NEWSMAN: To the
endzone, for the win!
109
00:04:10,717 --> 00:04:12,519
-(cheers)
NEWSMAN: He caught it!
110
00:04:12,619 --> 00:04:14,588
Yes! Yes,
he caught it!
111
00:04:14,688 --> 00:04:16,089
He caught it! Did you see that?!
112
00:04:16,190 --> 00:04:17,791
Oh, man, he caught
it!
113
00:04:17,891 --> 00:04:19,226
That was so great to see!
114
00:04:19,326 --> 00:04:21,895
And that's also so great to hear
someone say, "he caught it!
115
00:04:22,062 --> 00:04:23,263
and it's not about Omicron.
116
00:04:23,363 --> 00:04:24,631
Wow! For real, guys.
117
00:04:24,731 --> 00:04:25,899
That game, it was incredible.
118
00:04:26,066 --> 00:04:27,367
It was incredible.
All the games were.
119
00:04:27,467 --> 00:04:28,435
I was so amped up,
120
00:04:28,535 --> 00:04:30,070
I had trouble
going to bed afterwards.
121
00:04:30,137 --> 00:04:31,405
It was a huge problem.
122
00:04:31,505 --> 00:04:33,707
In fact, I think when the NFL
airs a game like this
123
00:04:33,807 --> 00:04:35,209
on Sunday nights,
124
00:04:35,309 --> 00:04:37,077
Like, they should think about us
people who need to go to sleep.
125
00:04:37,177 --> 00:04:38,412
You know? They should, like,
126
00:04:38,512 --> 00:04:40,614
maybe always air a New York
Jets game afterwards,
127
00:04:40,714 --> 00:04:41,748
just to help you relax.
128
00:04:41,849 --> 00:04:43,483
You know? Yeah.
129
00:04:43,584 --> 00:04:45,786
Oh, and-and you know what else
they need to do in the NFL?
130
00:04:45,886 --> 00:04:48,088
They need to get rid of
the sudden death rule, okay?
131
00:04:48,188 --> 00:04:50,824
Like, if one team scores,
the other team should
132
00:04:50,924 --> 00:04:52,659
have a chance to respond.
133
00:04:52,759 --> 00:04:54,461
We did this in soccer
a long time ago.
134
00:04:54,561 --> 00:04:55,963
We saw it's not fair
Like, what's the rush?
135
00:04:56,096 --> 00:04:58,498
No one is watching an
NFL playoff game in overtime
136
00:04:58,599 --> 00:05:00,868
thinking, "This is the most
exciting part of the game!
137
00:05:01,034 --> 00:05:03,537
Oh, I hope it
ends soon!" (laughs)
138
00:05:03,637 --> 00:05:05,772
And also, to base the
possession on a coin flip--
139
00:05:05,873 --> 00:05:07,341
Who came up with this?
It's not fair.
140
00:05:07,441 --> 00:05:08,775
It's archaic.
141
00:05:08,876 --> 00:05:10,110
Instead of a coin,
142
00:05:10,210 --> 00:05:11,311
they should
switch to crypto.
143
00:05:11,411 --> 00:05:14,181
Yeah. Both teams get a Bitcoin,
144
00:05:14,281 --> 00:05:16,049
and then whichever
side can explain why it's
145
00:05:16,149 --> 00:05:18,151
not a scam, they
get to go first.
146
00:05:18,252 --> 00:05:19,419
I think that's more fair.
147
00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:20,888
Although, honestly,
148
00:05:21,054 --> 00:05:23,423
I think this game shouldn't
have gone into overtime.
149
00:05:23,524 --> 00:05:25,692
You're telling me
that the Bills' defense
150
00:05:25,792 --> 00:05:28,195
couldn't have held
on for 13 seconds?
151
00:05:28,295 --> 00:05:30,697
13 seconds?!
152
00:05:30,797 --> 00:05:33,467
I've had farts that
last longer than that.
153
00:05:33,567 --> 00:05:36,336
And, yes, Mark, I have seen a
doctor about it,
154
00:05:36,436 --> 00:05:38,505
and yeah, he does have
some serious concerns,
155
00:05:38,605 --> 00:05:40,073
but that's not the point.
156
00:05:40,107 --> 00:05:41,308
You know what? I will say this,
157
00:05:41,408 --> 00:05:44,211
I think you can accomplish
a lot in 13 seconds.
158
00:05:44,311 --> 00:05:46,246
13 seconds is a great amount
of time. It's the right
159
00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:48,749
amount of time that you should
spend with your kid every day,
160
00:05:48,849 --> 00:05:50,784
it's exactly the amount
of time that the CDC says
161
00:05:50,884 --> 00:05:52,886
you should wash your hands,
162
00:05:52,986 --> 00:05:55,322
It's exactly the amount of
time that you should
163
00:05:55,422 --> 00:05:58,091
spend before
sending a tweet out.
164
00:05:58,192 --> 00:06:00,027
-Like, thinking about it?
-Yeah.
165
00:06:00,127 --> 00:06:01,361
Like, you'd be
surprised how much you could
166
00:06:01,461 --> 00:06:03,263
do in 13 seconds,
don't you think?
167
00:06:03,363 --> 00:06:04,298
I-I don't think I've
ever changed my mind
168
00:06:04,398 --> 00:06:06,533
about something in 13 seconds.
169
00:06:06,633 --> 00:06:09,336
Well, I don't know... you could.
170
00:06:09,436 --> 00:06:12,472
The corn-- The coin flip
thing I'm with you on, though.
171
00:06:12,573 --> 00:06:14,541
-Yeah, right?
-It does not belong in football.
172
00:06:14,641 --> 00:06:15,542
Does not belong in football.
173
00:06:15,642 --> 00:06:16,810
It could belong in other things.
174
00:06:16,910 --> 00:06:19,379
Like, I did flip a coin to
figure out which
175
00:06:19,479 --> 00:06:20,447
vaccine I should take.
176
00:06:20,547 --> 00:06:22,282
-It was like, heads I do
Pfizer... -Oh!
177
00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:23,817
...tails, I do Moderna,
178
00:06:23,917 --> 00:06:27,054
if the coin drops into
the sewer, I do J&J.
179
00:06:30,190 --> 00:06:31,859
I got Pfizer,
but it really could have gone
180
00:06:31,959 --> 00:06:33,427
-in a different direction.
-(laughing)
181
00:06:34,428 --> 00:06:36,129
-Oh, man. J&J.
-Yeah.
182
00:06:36,230 --> 00:06:38,065
I should maybe figure out
a different system
183
00:06:38,165 --> 00:06:39,633
for doing stuff like that.
184
00:06:39,733 --> 00:06:42,169
Oh. All right.
Let's move on to a team
185
00:06:42,269 --> 00:06:45,105
that hopefully has
a better defense than the Bills:
186
00:06:45,205 --> 00:06:46,473
Ukraine.
187
00:06:46,573 --> 00:06:49,309
For months now,
tensions have been building
188
00:06:49,409 --> 00:06:51,078
on the border of Ukraine
189
00:06:51,144 --> 00:06:54,848
as Russia
has sent 100,000 troops
190
00:06:54,948 --> 00:06:56,617
to the region.
191
00:06:56,717 --> 00:06:59,753
And now it's looking
like war could break out
192
00:06:59,853 --> 00:07:01,188
at any time.
193
00:07:01,288 --> 00:07:02,623
NEWSMAN:
With Russian troops amassing
194
00:07:02,723 --> 00:07:05,626
along Ukraine's northern,
southern and eastern borders,
195
00:07:05,726 --> 00:07:08,428
Europe now teetering
on the brink of war.
196
00:07:08,529 --> 00:07:10,697
NEWSMAN 2: U.S. officials
ordering the evacuation
197
00:07:10,797 --> 00:07:13,700
of family members of
U.S. embassy staff in Ukraine.
198
00:07:13,800 --> 00:07:16,370
The order comes
as tensions mount in the region
199
00:07:16,470 --> 00:07:18,438
with some fearing
a Russian invasion
200
00:07:18,539 --> 00:07:19,840
could come at any time
201
00:07:19,940 --> 00:07:22,676
despite consistent denials
by the Kremlin.
202
00:07:22,776 --> 00:07:25,546
Now the New York Times
reporting that President Biden
203
00:07:25,646 --> 00:07:28,048
is weighing sending
thousands of U.S. troops,
204
00:07:28,148 --> 00:07:31,051
warships and aircraft
to Eastern Europe.
205
00:07:31,151 --> 00:07:32,452
Secretary of State
Antony Blinken
206
00:07:32,553 --> 00:07:35,389
reaffirming U.S. support
for the Ukrainian government.
207
00:07:35,489 --> 00:07:38,458
BLINKEN: If a single
additional Russian force
208
00:07:38,559 --> 00:07:40,594
goes into Ukraine
in an aggressive way,
209
00:07:40,694 --> 00:07:42,162
uh, as I said,
that would trigger
210
00:07:42,262 --> 00:07:45,399
a swift, a severe
and a united response,
211
00:07:45,499 --> 00:07:47,501
uh, from us and from Europe.
212
00:07:47,601 --> 00:07:49,203
Yeah, you heard the man.
213
00:07:49,303 --> 00:07:51,772
Russia better not enter Ukraine
214
00:07:51,872 --> 00:07:53,640
in an aggressive way.
215
00:07:53,740 --> 00:07:57,778
But if the whole army just
kind of shimmies in, though,
216
00:07:57,878 --> 00:07:59,112
that would be kind of cute.
217
00:07:59,213 --> 00:08:00,781
You know, we'll let that slide.
218
00:08:00,881 --> 00:08:02,783
"Excuse me. Excuse me.
Coming to take country.
219
00:08:02,883 --> 00:08:04,651
Coming to take country, please."
220
00:08:04,751 --> 00:08:05,786
And look, those are strong words
221
00:08:05,886 --> 00:08:07,020
from America's
Secretary of State,
222
00:08:07,087 --> 00:08:08,689
but if I'm a Ukrainian,
223
00:08:08,789 --> 00:08:10,691
probably gonna hedge my bets,
you know?
224
00:08:10,791 --> 00:08:12,125
I'll look at what happened
with Afghanistan,
225
00:08:12,226 --> 00:08:14,695
and I'll book my seat
on that evacuation flight now.
226
00:08:14,795 --> 00:08:16,830
And this isn't just
about Ukraine, by the way.
227
00:08:16,930 --> 00:08:19,700
Many countries,
many countries are worried
228
00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:22,269
about what this war could mean
for the entire region.
229
00:08:22,369 --> 00:08:24,037
Hell, even for the entire world.
230
00:08:24,137 --> 00:08:25,906
It could spiral out
into a bigger war,
231
00:08:26,039 --> 00:08:27,708
like World War III.
232
00:08:27,808 --> 00:08:30,511
And personally,
I don't think America is ready
233
00:08:30,611 --> 00:08:33,780
to fight Russia over Ukraine.
234
00:08:33,881 --> 00:08:36,683
I mean, America's been fighting
brown people for so long.
235
00:08:36,783 --> 00:08:39,052
Does it even remember
how to fight white people?
236
00:08:39,119 --> 00:08:40,521
At least Ukraine
has time to prepare, though.
237
00:08:40,621 --> 00:08:42,122
That's the thing about war
these days.
238
00:08:42,222 --> 00:08:44,091
The element of surprise is gone.
239
00:08:44,191 --> 00:08:46,226
You got a satellite.
You see them.
240
00:08:46,326 --> 00:08:48,462
100,000 Russians at your border.
241
00:08:48,562 --> 00:08:50,864
Back in the old days, you
could launch a surprise attack,
242
00:08:50,964 --> 00:08:53,400
but now you send troops
to the other border,
243
00:08:53,500 --> 00:08:54,935
Waze just tells everybody.
244
00:08:55,068 --> 00:08:57,704
"Hey, the Russian army is
causing slowdowns on your route,
245
00:08:57,804 --> 00:08:59,873
so you probably want to avoid
the freeway."
246
00:09:00,007 --> 00:09:01,074
The thing I don't get
247
00:09:01,175 --> 00:09:03,210
is why Russia
even wants Ukraine so badly.
248
00:09:03,310 --> 00:09:06,580
Like, what do you want?
Have you seen a map of Russia?
249
00:09:06,680 --> 00:09:08,148
Just-just go to Siberia.
250
00:09:08,248 --> 00:09:10,117
There's
a Ukraine-sized piece of land
251
00:09:10,217 --> 00:09:12,019
with one guy living on it.
252
00:09:12,052 --> 00:09:13,754
You don't even have
to fight Ukraine.
253
00:09:13,854 --> 00:09:16,056
You could just fight Dmitri.
254
00:09:16,156 --> 00:09:19,626
I know why Russia's doing this.
They're doing it
255
00:09:19,726 --> 00:09:22,696
because we're in between
James Bonds right now.
256
00:09:22,796 --> 00:09:24,565
I mean, who's gonna stop Russia
257
00:09:24,665 --> 00:09:28,235
if it's not for having
one British alcoholic guy?
258
00:09:28,335 --> 00:09:30,871
We got to pick a Bond.
We got to pick a Bond.
259
00:09:31,038 --> 00:09:33,941
I would have never thought
of that as being the reason,
260
00:09:34,041 --> 00:09:35,375
but it's true. We are Bondless.
261
00:09:35,475 --> 00:09:37,144
-We're Bondless.
-(Noah exhales)
262
00:09:37,244 --> 00:09:40,047
It's not that hard.
We got to pick someone.
263
00:09:40,113 --> 00:09:41,448
I think it is hard.
264
00:09:41,548 --> 00:09:43,250
I mean,
there are so many of them.
265
00:09:43,350 --> 00:09:45,619
Well, yeah, but we got
a lot of great choices.
266
00:09:45,719 --> 00:09:48,088
-That's true. Yeah.
-Idris Elba.
267
00:09:49,857 --> 00:09:52,059
-You could do it.
-Oh, you're pointing at me?
268
00:09:52,092 --> 00:09:53,961
-You could do it.
-(chuckles)
269
00:09:54,061 --> 00:09:56,063
-No, I couldn't.
-Yes, you could.
270
00:09:56,096 --> 00:09:59,066
I d... I don't like...
I don't like vodka.
271
00:09:59,099 --> 00:10:00,400
Well, you could fake it, though.
272
00:10:00,501 --> 00:10:02,035
It's a part.
It's an acting role.
273
00:10:02,135 --> 00:10:03,470
You can do it.
I saw that shimmy.
274
00:10:03,570 --> 00:10:05,239
-You can't fake drink...
-That's a Bond shimmy.
275
00:10:05,339 --> 00:10:07,107
You can't fake drinking vodka.
276
00:10:07,207 --> 00:10:09,142
'Cause if you...
When you drink it,
277
00:10:09,243 --> 00:10:10,811
it, like, it still...
You taste it, and then you...
278
00:10:10,911 --> 00:10:12,446
Like, I throw up.
279
00:10:12,546 --> 00:10:14,681
You should try a little LSD.
280
00:10:14,781 --> 00:10:16,450
You could be a dry Bond
281
00:10:16,550 --> 00:10:18,519
but then replace it with LSD.
282
00:10:18,619 --> 00:10:20,754
-Oh, I like that.
-I'll call your agents.
283
00:10:20,854 --> 00:10:22,122
-Thank you, Desi.
-You're welcome.
284
00:10:22,222 --> 00:10:24,157
"I'll take my LSD...
285
00:10:24,258 --> 00:10:26,727
sh-shaken?"
286
00:10:26,827 --> 00:10:28,762
We'll workshop it.
287
00:10:28,862 --> 00:10:30,430
We'll work it out. Okay.
288
00:10:30,531 --> 00:10:33,433
Let's move on from a-a war
that might never start
289
00:10:33,534 --> 00:10:35,235
to one that never ends,
290
00:10:35,335 --> 00:10:37,938
the battle over COVID vaccines.
291
00:10:38,038 --> 00:10:41,341
After "what shoes
should M&Ms wear?"
292
00:10:41,441 --> 00:10:42,743
asking whether vaccines are good
293
00:10:42,843 --> 00:10:45,179
is literally the dumbest thing
people can fight about.
294
00:10:45,279 --> 00:10:46,980
But they are fighting.
295
00:10:47,080 --> 00:10:48,916
And, yesterday,
thousands of people
296
00:10:49,016 --> 00:10:51,385
held a rally
in Washington, D.C.,
297
00:10:51,485 --> 00:10:53,654
to hear why vaccine mandates
298
00:10:53,754 --> 00:10:56,456
are worse... (German accent):
than Hitler.
299
00:10:56,557 --> 00:10:58,525
NEWSWOMAN:
In the nation's capital Sunday,
300
00:10:58,625 --> 00:11:00,928
demonstrators gathered
at the Lincoln Memorial,
301
00:11:01,061 --> 00:11:03,931
many voicing opposition
to the COVID-19 vaccine,
302
00:11:04,064 --> 00:11:06,266
others protesting
vaccine mandates.
303
00:11:06,366 --> 00:11:08,902
Among the speakers,
Robert Kennedy Jr.,
304
00:11:09,069 --> 00:11:10,671
son of the late New York Senator
305
00:11:10,771 --> 00:11:12,773
and Attorney General
Robert F. Kennedy.
306
00:11:12,873 --> 00:11:17,211
What we're seeing today
is what I call
307
00:11:17,311 --> 00:11:19,446
"turnkey totalitarianism."
308
00:11:19,546 --> 00:11:21,281
They are putting in place
309
00:11:21,381 --> 00:11:23,584
all of these technocla--
310
00:11:23,684 --> 00:11:26,086
technological mechanisms
for control
311
00:11:26,153 --> 00:11:27,754
we've never seen before.
312
00:11:27,855 --> 00:11:29,723
Even in Hitler Germany,
you could--
313
00:11:29,823 --> 00:11:31,859
you could cross the Alps
into Switzerland,
314
00:11:31,959 --> 00:11:34,428
you could hide in an attic
like Anne Frank did.
315
00:11:34,528 --> 00:11:36,864
Yeah, the man is right.
Who could argue?
316
00:11:36,964 --> 00:11:40,100
No one ever talks about
how good Anne Frank had it.
317
00:11:40,133 --> 00:11:41,668
Free room and board.
318
00:11:41,768 --> 00:11:43,337
All the time in the world
to write.
319
00:11:43,437 --> 00:11:45,873
Pretty sweet deal,
if you ask me.
320
00:11:45,973 --> 00:11:47,875
I will say though,
crazy is relative.
321
00:11:47,975 --> 00:11:51,879
Because RFK may be saying
wild shit about the Holocaust,
322
00:11:51,979 --> 00:11:53,680
but half the people
he's talking to
323
00:11:53,780 --> 00:11:55,749
don't even believe
the Holocaust happened.
324
00:11:55,849 --> 00:11:57,885
Yeah, just standing there,
like, "Anne Frank?
325
00:11:57,985 --> 00:12:00,787
Didn't realize this guy
was such a liberal. Huh."
326
00:12:00,888 --> 00:12:03,690
My God, it's like every family
327
00:12:03,790 --> 00:12:05,959
has that one loose cannon.
328
00:12:06,059 --> 00:12:08,362
Like, just
a total embarrassment.
329
00:12:08,462 --> 00:12:10,430
Every family has that.
330
00:12:10,531 --> 00:12:13,867
Although, I have to say, I don't
think there's one in my family.
331
00:12:13,967 --> 00:12:16,537
Everyone is... pretty normal.
332
00:12:16,637 --> 00:12:19,406
Not, like,
one major embarrassment.
333
00:12:19,506 --> 00:12:20,707
So...
334
00:12:21,675 --> 00:12:23,143
Oh, my God.
335
00:12:23,243 --> 00:12:25,179
-Am I the embarrassment?
-No.
336
00:12:25,279 --> 00:12:27,247
-Am I the one?
-No.
337
00:12:27,347 --> 00:12:30,083
Oh, God, I'm the Chet Hanks.
338
00:12:30,117 --> 00:12:32,085
Aw, shit.
339
00:12:32,119 --> 00:12:34,655
Guess I better not put out
that rap video.
340
00:12:34,755 --> 00:12:37,324
My patois was getting so good.
341
00:12:37,424 --> 00:12:38,759
-(chuckles softly)
-(sighs)
342
00:12:38,859 --> 00:12:40,260
Delete it.
343
00:12:41,228 --> 00:12:42,196
Anyway...
344
00:12:42,296 --> 00:12:43,897
I'm-I'm sorry
you found that out.
345
00:12:43,997 --> 00:12:45,365
On TV, Desi.
346
00:12:45,465 --> 00:12:47,734
Are we on TV?
347
00:12:47,835 --> 00:12:50,504
All right, finally,
let's talk about movie trailers.
348
00:12:50,604 --> 00:12:53,473
That's a question I ask myself
all the time, to be honest.
349
00:12:53,574 --> 00:12:56,276
All right, and, finally,
let's talk about movie trailers.
350
00:12:56,376 --> 00:12:58,679
They're the free sample
that the theater hands out
351
00:12:58,779 --> 00:13:00,914
so that hopefully
you'll buy the whole movie.
352
00:13:01,048 --> 00:13:02,683
Normally, trailers are
a simple thing that we watch
353
00:13:02,783 --> 00:13:03,851
and then we move on
with our lives.
354
00:13:03,951 --> 00:13:06,687
But now some people
are very upset
355
00:13:06,787 --> 00:13:09,523
about a trailer
that promised more
356
00:13:09,623 --> 00:13:11,058
than it could deliver.
357
00:13:11,158 --> 00:13:14,561
NEWSWOMAN: Well, two fans
of actress Ana de Armas
358
00:13:14,661 --> 00:13:17,297
have filed a federal
class action lawsuit
359
00:13:17,397 --> 00:13:18,465
against Universal.
360
00:13:18,565 --> 00:13:20,901
They say the actress
was not in the final cut
361
00:13:21,068 --> 00:13:24,204
of the movie Yesterday, although
she appeared in the trailer.
362
00:13:24,304 --> 00:13:27,074
The suit accuses Universal
of engaging
363
00:13:27,107 --> 00:13:28,909
in deceptive
marketing techniques,
364
00:13:29,076 --> 00:13:31,411
false advertisement,
unjust enrichment
365
00:13:31,512 --> 00:13:33,213
and violating competition laws.
366
00:13:33,313 --> 00:13:36,884
The suit seeks to recover
at least five million dollars.
367
00:13:36,984 --> 00:13:38,285
Hell yeah!
368
00:13:38,385 --> 00:13:40,521
Give these people
their five million dollars!
369
00:13:40,621 --> 00:13:42,556
Give it to them!
This shit drives me crazy, man.
370
00:13:42,656 --> 00:13:44,658
Let me tell you something,
this happens all the time,
371
00:13:44,758 --> 00:13:46,326
and nobody does anything
about this.
372
00:13:46,426 --> 00:13:48,328
They have trailers
that have nothing to do with...
373
00:13:48,428 --> 00:13:50,330
they just put things in,
and then I go there...
374
00:13:50,430 --> 00:13:51,632
Like, there's a badass scene
375
00:13:51,732 --> 00:13:53,800
in the trailer
for Licorice Pizza, right?
376
00:13:53,901 --> 00:13:56,103
Where Bradley Cooper is doing
some kung fu smashing thing,
377
00:13:56,170 --> 00:13:58,238
it's, like, car windows, he's
got, like, a pair of squeegees.
378
00:13:58,338 --> 00:14:00,541
But that doesn't happen
in the movie. Never happens.
379
00:14:00,641 --> 00:14:02,576
The whole movie, I was waiting
for it-- never happened.
380
00:14:02,676 --> 00:14:04,545
I even sat through the credits
to see if, like,
381
00:14:04,645 --> 00:14:05,879
it comes afterwards.
382
00:14:06,046 --> 00:14:07,648
Nothing. I mean,
Samuel L. Jackson came out,
383
00:14:07,748 --> 00:14:09,449
and he recruited everyone
for The Avengers,
384
00:14:09,550 --> 00:14:11,785
but otherwise,
nothing about the car windows.
385
00:14:11,885 --> 00:14:13,520
That's the problem
with movie trailers.
386
00:14:13,620 --> 00:14:15,422
They all go too far
in one direction or another.
387
00:14:15,522 --> 00:14:16,857
They're either showing me
the stuff
388
00:14:16,957 --> 00:14:18,091
that's not in the movie,
389
00:14:18,192 --> 00:14:19,826
or they're showing me
the entire movie.
390
00:14:19,927 --> 00:14:21,328
-♪ ♪
-First, they fell in love.
391
00:14:21,428 --> 00:14:23,063
But then they broke up.
392
00:14:23,130 --> 00:14:24,965
But then they reunited
on the Eiffel Tower.
393
00:14:25,065 --> 00:14:27,134
That's the big finale.
You never see it coming.
394
00:14:27,234 --> 00:14:30,871
Except we just showed it to you,
so you will this summer.
395
00:14:30,971 --> 00:14:32,372
Stop doing that!
396
00:14:32,472 --> 00:14:35,075
Just pique my interest.
That's it.
397
00:14:35,175 --> 00:14:37,077
I will say,
at the same time, though,
398
00:14:37,177 --> 00:14:39,479
$5 million is a big penalty.
399
00:14:39,580 --> 00:14:43,083
I don't know if the movie studio
should pay $5 million for this.
400
00:14:43,116 --> 00:14:46,553
Like, I think it would be enough
to just give them a free popcorn
401
00:14:46,653 --> 00:14:48,255
at the next movie.
402
00:14:48,355 --> 00:14:50,257
You know?
But make it a large popcorn,
403
00:14:50,357 --> 00:14:52,826
because the lawyers, they're
gonna take two-thirds of it.
404
00:14:52,926 --> 00:14:55,262
Yeah. That's how law works.
405
00:14:55,362 --> 00:14:56,930
But there should be
some punishment
406
00:14:57,097 --> 00:14:59,132
for lying to your audience
407
00:14:59,233 --> 00:15:01,168
about who's in your movie.
408
00:15:01,268 --> 00:15:03,203
You can't just get away
with that.
409
00:15:03,303 --> 00:15:05,405
Or if there's no punishment,
then fine.
410
00:15:05,506 --> 00:15:07,741
But then I should get
to do it, too.
411
00:15:07,841 --> 00:15:10,277
Yeah. Make sure to stick around
for my exclusive interview
412
00:15:10,377 --> 00:15:12,346
with the ghost
of Princess Diana.
413
00:15:12,446 --> 00:15:13,814
Coming up next.
414
00:15:13,914 --> 00:15:17,050
I mean, really, if we're gonna
sue movie trailers for anything,
415
00:15:17,150 --> 00:15:20,754
it should be for destroying
our favorite childhood song.
416
00:15:20,854 --> 00:15:24,691
They always, like, put it in
some creepy, slowed-down version
417
00:15:24,791 --> 00:15:27,261
-of a kids' song, like...
-Yeah, right?
418
00:15:27,361 --> 00:15:31,265
Like, they're like,
♪ Ring around the rosie. ♪
419
00:15:31,365 --> 00:15:32,699
I'm like, "Great.
420
00:15:32,799 --> 00:15:34,935
"Thanks for ruining
my favorite childhood song
421
00:15:35,068 --> 00:15:37,237
of people dying in the plague."
422
00:15:37,337 --> 00:15:39,573
Destroyed it forever.
423
00:15:39,673 --> 00:15:41,942
They're like:
"From the creators of Saw,
424
00:15:42,075 --> 00:15:46,980
it's... ♪ Head, shoulders,
knees and toes. ♪
425
00:15:47,981 --> 00:15:49,449
Crazy. It's awful.
You better hope
426
00:15:49,550 --> 00:15:51,451
they don't reboot Jaws--
it'll be like,
427
00:15:51,552 --> 00:15:54,821
♪ Baby shark,
doo, doo, doo-doo ♪
428
00:15:54,922 --> 00:15:57,224
-♪ Doo, doo-doo. ♪
-(laughs)
429
00:15:58,091 --> 00:15:59,927
That song became very creepy
430
00:16:00,027 --> 00:16:01,695
-when you sang it slow,
actually. -I know, right?
431
00:16:01,795 --> 00:16:03,564
Try getting that out of your
head for the rest of the day.
432
00:16:03,664 --> 00:16:05,032
Just like someone walking
through...
433
00:16:05,098 --> 00:16:07,467
-If someone was singing that
at night in my house, -Yeah.
434
00:16:07,568 --> 00:16:11,205
really, like,
♪ Doo, doo, doo-doo, doo-doo. ♪
435
00:16:11,305 --> 00:16:12,906
That's terrifying, actually.
436
00:16:13,040 --> 00:16:15,809
Yeah, I got,
I have nightmares about it.
437
00:16:15,909 --> 00:16:17,811
It could be the LSD, but...
438
00:16:17,911 --> 00:16:19,913
You-you should...
439
00:16:20,047 --> 00:16:21,381
Never mind.
440
00:16:21,481 --> 00:16:25,052
All right, when we come back,
we'll talk about West Elm Caleb,
441
00:16:25,152 --> 00:16:27,721
and why social media is
the best place
442
00:16:27,821 --> 00:16:29,122
to hash out your drama.
443
00:16:29,223 --> 00:16:30,624
You don't want to miss out.
444
00:16:36,196 --> 00:16:38,732
Did you guys... did you guys see
this thing about West Elm Caleb?
445
00:16:38,832 --> 00:16:40,033
Has anybody seen this story?
446
00:16:40,133 --> 00:16:42,335
It's a huge story that, like...
It has...
447
00:16:42,435 --> 00:16:43,770
It blew up. Well, it's weird.
448
00:16:43,870 --> 00:16:46,539
It started on TikTok,
and then it got bigger,
449
00:16:46,640 --> 00:16:49,109
and it went from... it went
from TikTok to, like, tabloids,
450
00:16:49,209 --> 00:16:51,578
and then from tabloids,
it went to, like, newspapers
451
00:16:51,678 --> 00:16:53,480
and, like, you know
The New York Times.
452
00:16:53,580 --> 00:16:55,248
And everyone wrote about it.
453
00:16:55,348 --> 00:16:57,651
The long and short
of the story is, um,
454
00:16:57,751 --> 00:17:00,587
there's a woman on TikTok
who posted a story
455
00:17:00,687 --> 00:17:02,889
about a bad date that she had
with a guy named "Caleb."
456
00:17:02,989 --> 00:17:05,825
Then, other women saw
that video, and they thought
457
00:17:05,925 --> 00:17:07,193
she was talking
about another Caleb.
458
00:17:07,294 --> 00:17:08,895
And then, they were, like,
"Ah, yeah, we met Caleb."
459
00:17:08,995 --> 00:17:10,297
And she's like,
"Well, not that Caleb."
460
00:17:10,397 --> 00:17:11,765
But they were like, "But what
is... Who's this Caleb?"
461
00:17:11,865 --> 00:17:13,166
And turns out there's a Caleb
462
00:17:13,266 --> 00:17:15,568
who apparently worked at
West Elm, the furniture place.
463
00:17:15,669 --> 00:17:16,970
And then,
these women were now like,
464
00:17:17,070 --> 00:17:20,307
"Yeah, this Caleb is a dick.
What he did was, he, um,
465
00:17:20,407 --> 00:17:24,044
"took me on a date and then went
on a bunch of dates with me
466
00:17:24,144 --> 00:17:26,813
and then ghosted me
and disappeared." And then...
467
00:17:26,913 --> 00:17:29,182
I don't know if, like, one of
the women or other women was
468
00:17:29,282 --> 00:17:31,151
like, "He also sent
unsolicited dick pics."
469
00:17:31,251 --> 00:17:33,720
And this became a huge...
but this became huge online.
470
00:17:33,820 --> 00:17:36,323
Like, I mean, massive,
all right?
471
00:17:36,423 --> 00:17:40,727
And then, what happened was,
like, one of the women's videos
472
00:17:40,827 --> 00:17:43,296
went really viral,
and she put up Caleb's face
473
00:17:43,396 --> 00:17:45,298
and his name and everything,
474
00:17:45,398 --> 00:17:48,501
so people tracked him down,
found his workplace,
475
00:17:48,601 --> 00:17:50,804
started threatening, like,
West Elm, like,
476
00:17:50,904 --> 00:17:53,039
about, like, furniture
and shit, and him,
477
00:17:53,206 --> 00:17:54,541
and then, um...
478
00:17:54,641 --> 00:17:56,109
And then, like, he's gone now.
479
00:17:56,209 --> 00:17:58,645
The guy's, like, basically
had to go deep undercover.
480
00:17:58,745 --> 00:18:00,213
He's just gone.
481
00:18:00,280 --> 00:18:02,716
He's a six-foot-four white boy
named Caleb, and he's gone.
482
00:18:02,816 --> 00:18:05,085
And... and this became
a huge storyline,
483
00:18:05,218 --> 00:18:07,454
because people were like,
"Yeah, he got what he deserved.
484
00:18:07,554 --> 00:18:11,992
You know, this is terrible what
he did to women and whatever."
485
00:18:12,092 --> 00:18:14,260
And I was... I was going...
I was watching the story evolve
486
00:18:14,361 --> 00:18:17,130
over the weekend, and you know
what was going through my head?
487
00:18:17,230 --> 00:18:19,132
Well, first of all,
I was thinking, like,
488
00:18:19,232 --> 00:18:22,636
it's amazing how much coverage
he got from ghosting.
489
00:18:22,736 --> 00:18:25,572
He didn't do anything,
like, super bad
490
00:18:25,672 --> 00:18:27,240
from what the people are saying.
491
00:18:27,307 --> 00:18:29,542
Unsolicited-unsolicited
dick picks we'll talk about.
492
00:18:29,643 --> 00:18:32,479
Obviously, that's bad.
But I'm saying, he just ghosted,
493
00:18:32,579 --> 00:18:35,415
and then, the guy's viral on
every newspaper in the country.
494
00:18:35,515 --> 00:18:38,585
And all I kept thinking was,
the Uyghurs in China--
495
00:18:38,685 --> 00:18:40,286
they should ghost someone.
496
00:18:40,387 --> 00:18:43,223
I've never seen them
get this much coverage.
497
00:18:43,323 --> 00:18:44,991
Yeah, just, like,
ghost a few people,
498
00:18:45,091 --> 00:18:46,226
and then, all of a sudden,
499
00:18:46,326 --> 00:18:47,827
everyone was gonna be talking
about you.
500
00:18:47,927 --> 00:18:49,896
You know? But it was wild
to me that, like,
501
00:18:49,996 --> 00:18:51,898
this thing became
such a big story
502
00:18:51,998 --> 00:18:53,300
considering it was,
like, a private date
503
00:18:53,400 --> 00:18:55,402
and a private conversation.
And don't get it twisted.
504
00:18:55,502 --> 00:18:57,804
I'm not blaming women
who went on dates or anything.
505
00:18:57,904 --> 00:18:58,805
It's like a commentary
506
00:18:58,905 --> 00:19:00,106
on the culture that we live in.
507
00:19:00,206 --> 00:19:01,541
Do you know what I mean?
508
00:19:01,641 --> 00:19:03,109
But I, I felt like--
509
00:19:03,209 --> 00:19:05,412
I don't know if I was the only
person, I was going,
510
00:19:05,512 --> 00:19:09,616
"Have we lost the ability
to go on bad dates?"
511
00:19:09,716 --> 00:19:12,652
Is that not a thing anymore?
512
00:19:12,752 --> 00:19:14,621
Because I go, like, if you,
if you have a bad date,
513
00:19:14,721 --> 00:19:16,956
you're allowed to feel
upset about it, all right,
514
00:19:17,057 --> 00:19:18,725
and you should be
able to talk about it,
515
00:19:18,825 --> 00:19:21,227
I mean, you-- and you should
be able to roast, like,
516
00:19:21,261 --> 00:19:22,362
if you went on a
date with a shit guy,
517
00:19:22,462 --> 00:19:23,563
roast him all you want.
518
00:19:23,663 --> 00:19:25,799
Like, that's in the
Constitution, I think.
519
00:19:25,899 --> 00:19:27,534
The whole point
of dating is so that
520
00:19:27,634 --> 00:19:29,903
you can talk shit
about bad dates.
521
00:19:30,003 --> 00:19:31,304
Like, that's why you go on
dates,
522
00:19:31,404 --> 00:19:32,706
is 'cause you want to
get stories about
523
00:19:32,806 --> 00:19:34,007
how shit the dates were.
524
00:19:34,174 --> 00:19:35,442
You know, otherwise,
what's the point of dating?
525
00:19:35,542 --> 00:19:37,010
(stammers) You-You're like,
trying to find love.
526
00:19:37,177 --> 00:19:38,178
That's boring, you know?
527
00:19:38,278 --> 00:19:40,180
Love is, like, what
you want at the end,
528
00:19:40,246 --> 00:19:42,015
but you want the bad date
stories along the way.
529
00:19:42,182 --> 00:19:43,249
That's why you're dating.
530
00:19:43,350 --> 00:19:44,884
Otherwise, you just do an
arranged marriage
531
00:19:44,985 --> 00:19:45,885
and you just
go straight in,
532
00:19:45,986 --> 00:19:46,920
no stories.
533
00:19:47,020 --> 00:19:48,788
You know what I'm saying?
534
00:19:48,888 --> 00:19:51,791
But now, like, w-what's weird to
me with this story is
535
00:19:51,891 --> 00:19:53,893
like, these people
are sharing stories
536
00:19:53,994 --> 00:19:57,764
that I personally felt you would
share with your friends, right?
537
00:19:57,864 --> 00:19:59,566
But now they're sharing them on
social media,
538
00:19:59,666 --> 00:20:01,501
going like, "Oh, this is what
happened to me personally
539
00:20:01,601 --> 00:20:04,204
in my life," and then social
media jumps on,
540
00:20:04,304 --> 00:20:06,539
because the algorithm takes
the story-- which is, like,
541
00:20:06,640 --> 00:20:07,974
a funny story. Because I--
542
00:20:08,074 --> 00:20:11,011
I should also include-- the
woman who had, like,
543
00:20:11,111 --> 00:20:12,879
one of the most viral videos,
she came out afterwards, and
544
00:20:12,979 --> 00:20:16,082
she's like, "Oh, I didn't want
Caleb to get death threats.
545
00:20:16,216 --> 00:20:19,119
I thought I was just telling a
funny story to people on TikTok"
546
00:20:19,219 --> 00:20:20,553
which she was.
547
00:20:20,654 --> 00:20:24,391
But then the algorithm
goes, like, "Ah! Conflict!"
548
00:20:24,491 --> 00:20:26,760
You know? It's
the conflict monster.
549
00:20:26,860 --> 00:20:28,261
And then it put it
out to the world
550
00:20:28,361 --> 00:20:30,630
and the world was like, "We
don't see anything funny,
551
00:20:30,730 --> 00:20:33,166
West Elm
Caleb must die."
552
00:20:33,266 --> 00:20:35,268
They were like,
"West Elm Caleb must die."
553
00:20:35,368 --> 00:20:37,170
And I love that that
was his thing.
554
00:20:37,203 --> 00:20:38,171
Tabloids, everyone was like,
555
00:20:38,238 --> 00:20:40,573
"West Elm Caleb!
West Elm Caleb!"
556
00:20:40,674 --> 00:20:42,008
Everyone.
557
00:20:42,175 --> 00:20:43,443
Which is shitty, in my opinion.
558
00:20:43,543 --> 00:20:45,278
I-I do not know West Elm Caleb,
559
00:20:45,378 --> 00:20:47,247
I have no affiliation with
West Elm Caleb.
560
00:20:47,347 --> 00:20:48,281
I do not care for him.
561
00:20:48,381 --> 00:20:49,883
He's some random
six-foot-four white boy,
562
00:20:49,983 --> 00:20:51,584
I don't care. But maybe that's
part of the reason it's
563
00:20:51,685 --> 00:20:52,619
fashionable to dunk on him, is
'cause
564
00:20:52,719 --> 00:20:53,653
he's a straight white
guy,
565
00:20:53,753 --> 00:20:55,455
so people are like,
"Yeah, get him!"
566
00:20:55,555 --> 00:20:56,990
But I still go,
"He's a human being."
567
00:20:57,090 --> 00:20:58,725
We haven't heard his
side of the story,
568
00:20:58,825 --> 00:20:59,826
and people can
just shit on him.
569
00:20:59,926 --> 00:21:00,994
And I don't think it's fair.
570
00:21:01,094 --> 00:21:02,295
I genuinely
don't think it's fair that,
571
00:21:02,395 --> 00:21:06,199
like, like internet mobs
just jump on you like this.
572
00:21:06,232 --> 00:21:07,434
And then your job?
573
00:21:07,534 --> 00:21:08,468
This shit went to his job.
574
00:21:08,568 --> 00:21:10,003
Imagine, now, your boss
is there
575
00:21:10,103 --> 00:21:13,773
and he's like, "Ah, good sales
quarter, uh, you know, but, uh,
576
00:21:13,873 --> 00:21:17,877
the streets are saying
you're a (bleep) boy."
577
00:21:17,978 --> 00:21:20,080
No one deserves that.
578
00:21:20,213 --> 00:21:22,215
And West Elm
doesn't deserve this.
579
00:21:22,315 --> 00:21:24,050
These poor people are
trying to sell furniture.
580
00:21:24,217 --> 00:21:25,618
Next thing, their phones are
ringing off the hook.
581
00:21:25,719 --> 00:21:28,588
They must've been like,
"Oh, shit! The ads are working!"
582
00:21:28,688 --> 00:21:30,690
Then they pick up the phone,
"Hello?
583
00:21:30,790 --> 00:21:32,292
"What? No,
584
00:21:32,392 --> 00:21:33,994
No, I won't forward your bomb
to Caleb."
585
00:21:34,160 --> 00:21:35,695
Thank you."
586
00:21:35,795 --> 00:21:37,998
And it's like...
587
00:21:38,164 --> 00:21:41,167
This-this story for me was,
like, the perfect encapsulation
588
00:21:41,201 --> 00:21:44,471
of all the things that are great
about social media
589
00:21:44,571 --> 00:21:46,640
but then also all the downsides
of social media,
590
00:21:46,740 --> 00:21:49,709
and part of it was a lot of the
language that people were using.
591
00:21:49,809 --> 00:21:51,811
'Cause they were saying
what Caleb does...
592
00:21:51,911 --> 00:21:54,848
Because apparently he sent
some of the women
593
00:21:54,948 --> 00:21:57,217
the same playlist
that he sent the other women,
594
00:21:57,317 --> 00:21:58,685
but he called them
different names,
595
00:21:58,785 --> 00:22:02,055
and so they were like,
"Oh, he's gaslighting us."
596
00:22:02,188 --> 00:22:05,325
I was like, "No,
that's just recycling game."
597
00:22:05,425 --> 00:22:06,626
You know what I mean?
598
00:22:06,726 --> 00:22:08,895
That-That's...
Most people have limited game.
599
00:22:08,995 --> 00:22:10,463
I don't know why everyone
thinks they're fancy.
600
00:22:10,563 --> 00:22:11,865
Most people...
601
00:22:11,965 --> 00:22:13,433
Everything you think
that's unique about a person,
602
00:22:13,533 --> 00:22:15,735
they've done to everybody else
that they've met.
603
00:22:15,835 --> 00:22:18,772
"Well, is it just me,
or are you..."
604
00:22:18,872 --> 00:22:20,440
Yeah,
you've done this many times.
605
00:22:20,540 --> 00:22:22,375
There's nothing spontaneous
about anybody.
606
00:22:22,475 --> 00:22:24,210
They've done all the shit
that you've met them doing.
607
00:22:24,244 --> 00:22:26,313
Every sexual position.
Every everything.
608
00:22:26,413 --> 00:22:28,348
Do you know what I mean?
They're not gaslighting you.
609
00:22:28,448 --> 00:22:30,483
And then they were saying
he's love bombing,
610
00:22:30,583 --> 00:22:31,718
which,
if I understand correctly,
611
00:22:31,818 --> 00:22:34,487
means he was...
He, like, like, just...
612
00:22:34,587 --> 00:22:36,323
He piled it on thick
at the beginning
613
00:22:36,423 --> 00:22:38,358
and then just disappeared
afterward.
614
00:22:38,458 --> 00:22:40,327
So he's like, "Oh, I like you.
I like you. I like you."
615
00:22:40,427 --> 00:22:42,162
Texting, texting, texting.
Then he disappeared,
616
00:22:42,262 --> 00:22:43,997
and they were like,
"That's love bombing."
617
00:22:44,164 --> 00:22:45,265
And here's the thing.
618
00:22:45,365 --> 00:22:46,666
I'm glad that people
are going to therapy.
619
00:22:46,766 --> 00:22:48,168
I'm going to therapy.
Everyone's going to therapy.
620
00:22:48,234 --> 00:22:49,302
But we should be careful
621
00:22:49,402 --> 00:22:51,004
to bring the therapy speak
into life
622
00:22:51,171 --> 00:22:53,506
'cause we are not therapists.
Know what I mean?
623
00:22:53,606 --> 00:22:55,008
I don't know
if this is love bombing.
624
00:22:55,175 --> 00:22:56,309
I think this is human nature.
625
00:22:56,409 --> 00:22:57,877
We get obsessed with a thing
when it's new,
626
00:22:57,978 --> 00:23:00,013
we love using it, and that's it.
627
00:23:00,180 --> 00:23:02,182
When I was young,
my mom bought me a fire truck.
628
00:23:02,215 --> 00:23:03,917
I drove the shit out
of that fire truck.
629
00:23:04,017 --> 00:23:05,618
Like, the whole house
was burning for a week.
630
00:23:05,719 --> 00:23:07,320
And then I didn't use
the fire truck.
631
00:23:07,420 --> 00:23:08,488
My mom didn't come and be like,
632
00:23:08,588 --> 00:23:10,390
"You're love bombing
that fire truck."
633
00:23:10,490 --> 00:23:12,192
She was just like,
"You-you got bored."
634
00:23:12,258 --> 00:23:15,195
It... The thing is not what...
You know what I mean?
635
00:23:15,228 --> 00:23:16,763
And then they're like,
"This is abuse.
636
00:23:16,863 --> 00:23:18,198
This is a form of abuse."
637
00:23:18,231 --> 00:23:19,866
Look, man,
I take abuse really seriously.
638
00:23:19,966 --> 00:23:21,868
I think we all should. You know?
639
00:23:21,968 --> 00:23:25,305
But I don't think
all rejection is abuse.
640
00:23:25,405 --> 00:23:28,408
Life is about getting rejected,
unfortunately.
641
00:23:28,508 --> 00:23:31,211
For everyone to get a yes,
someone had to get a no.
642
00:23:31,311 --> 00:23:32,612
Every one of us here.
643
00:23:32,712 --> 00:23:34,247
The fact that you're
in a relationship with someone
644
00:23:34,347 --> 00:23:36,750
is because other people
rejected them or rejected you.
645
00:23:36,850 --> 00:23:38,618
That's the only reason
we get there.
646
00:23:38,718 --> 00:23:40,186
Life is about rejection.
647
00:23:40,286 --> 00:23:41,621
People have a right
to reject you.
648
00:23:41,721 --> 00:23:44,524
It's shit, but they have a right
to reject you.
649
00:23:44,624 --> 00:23:46,326
You know? All of these things.
650
00:23:46,426 --> 00:23:48,028
It's like people... It's like
now we're living in a world
651
00:23:48,161 --> 00:23:49,462
where people are like,
"Ah, no, I...
652
00:23:49,562 --> 00:23:52,198
I... No, I don't have a right
to not feel good."
653
00:23:52,299 --> 00:23:54,334
No, that's... I don't want you
to not feel good,
654
00:23:54,434 --> 00:23:56,503
but people have a right
to reject you.
655
00:23:56,603 --> 00:23:59,272
In fact, ghosting
is not as bad as people think
656
00:23:59,372 --> 00:24:00,840
because the person
is sending you a message
657
00:24:00,940 --> 00:24:03,843
by not sending you a message.
You know what I mean?
658
00:24:03,943 --> 00:24:05,445
Like, I've never been ghosted
and been like,
659
00:24:05,545 --> 00:24:07,981
-"But how do they feel
about me?" -(laughter)
660
00:24:08,081 --> 00:24:09,816
That's-- Th-They're telling you.
661
00:24:09,916 --> 00:24:11,351
They're telling you.
662
00:24:11,451 --> 00:24:12,952
You're like, "I don't know
how they feel about me."
663
00:24:13,053 --> 00:24:14,921
They-- Yeah, y-you know how--
You know what I mean?
664
00:24:15,021 --> 00:24:16,489
The only people
who don't understand ghosting
665
00:24:16,589 --> 00:24:18,224
is those automatic services
that text you.
666
00:24:18,325 --> 00:24:21,294
Then they say, "Reply 'stop.'
667
00:24:21,394 --> 00:24:22,796
"If you want to stop getting
these messages,
668
00:24:22,896 --> 00:24:24,197
please reply 'stop.'"
669
00:24:24,230 --> 00:24:25,865
You know?
670
00:24:25,966 --> 00:24:28,268
So, I don't know. I think it was
unfair for West Elm Caleb.
671
00:24:28,368 --> 00:24:30,370
Because, look, I get,
I get what that woman was doing.
672
00:24:30,470 --> 00:24:32,138
She was telling a funny story
online.
673
00:24:32,172 --> 00:24:33,606
I don't think she should
have included his face.
674
00:24:33,707 --> 00:24:35,608
I don't think she should
have included his name.
675
00:24:35,709 --> 00:24:37,043
You can tell the story
and it'll be just as funny
676
00:24:37,143 --> 00:24:38,678
without telling--
You could even call--
677
00:24:38,778 --> 00:24:41,214
Call him Furniture Boy.
I think that's a great name.
678
00:24:41,314 --> 00:24:42,983
Furniture Boy. Great.
679
00:24:43,149 --> 00:24:45,151
You know? But then I think,
as society as well,
680
00:24:45,218 --> 00:24:47,654
we need to calm down
with just being these, like--
681
00:24:47,754 --> 00:24:49,589
You know, we're not even,
like, detectives.
682
00:24:49,689 --> 00:24:51,491
We just jump into viral mobs.
683
00:24:51,591 --> 00:24:52,993
We don't know the people.
684
00:24:53,159 --> 00:24:54,761
We don't know the full story.
685
00:24:54,861 --> 00:24:55,996
Right?
686
00:24:56,162 --> 00:24:58,365
All we know is that strangers
are having drama.
687
00:24:58,465 --> 00:25:01,635
And then, before you know it, we
just decide to insert ourselves.
688
00:25:01,735 --> 00:25:04,237
And I always think to myself,
before you insert yourself
689
00:25:04,337 --> 00:25:07,040
in any drama like this,
ask yourself
690
00:25:07,173 --> 00:25:09,075
if that's what you would want
strangers doing to you.
691
00:25:09,175 --> 00:25:11,177
Just ask yourself that question.
692
00:25:13,179 --> 00:25:15,281
That's just my opinion on it,
you know.
693
00:25:15,382 --> 00:25:17,050
And-and, please, I know people--
694
00:25:17,183 --> 00:25:19,085
I'm not talking
about the dick pics.
695
00:25:19,185 --> 00:25:20,854
Just to be clear.
696
00:25:20,954 --> 00:25:22,322
I'm not including that.
697
00:25:22,422 --> 00:25:25,859
Unsolicited dick pics
are never okay.
698
00:25:25,959 --> 00:25:27,294
Never okay.
699
00:25:27,394 --> 00:25:29,329
Dick pics in general, people.
700
00:25:29,429 --> 00:25:32,132
I don't know why anyone
is sending dick pics.
701
00:25:32,165 --> 00:25:34,868
Right? They're-they're not cool.
702
00:25:34,968 --> 00:25:36,136
Do you know what I mean?
703
00:25:36,202 --> 00:25:37,904
Like, have you ever seen
the statue of David?
704
00:25:38,004 --> 00:25:40,140
Even there, Michelangelo
was like, "Giant statue.
705
00:25:40,173 --> 00:25:41,808
Dick, no. He can just..."
706
00:25:41,908 --> 00:25:43,410
He's like,
"You don't want this thing now."
707
00:25:43,510 --> 00:25:44,511
(chuckling)
708
00:25:44,611 --> 00:25:45,979
Dicks are not, like--
they're not cool.
709
00:25:46,146 --> 00:25:49,549
No one's day is ever made better
by an unexpected dick pic.
710
00:25:49,649 --> 00:25:52,452
You know? No one's ever like,
"Yeah, I was really depressed,
711
00:25:52,552 --> 00:25:54,754
"but then I saw Barry's dick
and I thought, you know what,
712
00:25:54,854 --> 00:25:56,189
everything's gonna be okay."
713
00:25:56,289 --> 00:25:57,657
(laughter)
714
00:25:57,757 --> 00:25:59,159
Like, if a woman wants
to see your dick,
715
00:25:59,259 --> 00:26:01,027
she will ask you for a picture
716
00:26:01,161 --> 00:26:03,196
or she'll watch Euphoria.
717
00:26:03,296 --> 00:26:05,565
There's, like,
a dick a minute in that show.
718
00:26:05,665 --> 00:26:07,033
Which is great.
719
00:26:07,167 --> 00:26:08,568
Don't send your dick to anyb--
720
00:26:08,668 --> 00:26:10,437
Nobody, nobody's day
is made better
721
00:26:10,537 --> 00:26:12,372
by you randomly sending them
your dick.
722
00:26:12,472 --> 00:26:13,807
You seen penises?
723
00:26:13,907 --> 00:26:15,809
They look like
depressed old men.
724
00:26:15,909 --> 00:26:17,777
(laughter)
725
00:26:17,877 --> 00:26:19,713
No one wants to see your dick.
726
00:26:21,047 --> 00:26:23,016
So, yeah, that's West Elm Caleb.
Oh, by the way,
727
00:26:23,183 --> 00:26:24,985
did I tell you
about the date I had with, uh,
728
00:26:25,085 --> 00:26:26,486
Restoration Hardware Heather?
729
00:26:26,586 --> 00:26:28,755
(laughter)
730
00:26:28,855 --> 00:26:30,390
(chuckling)
731
00:26:34,094 --> 00:26:35,428
Welcome back to
The Daily Show.
732
00:26:35,529 --> 00:26:37,964
My guest tonight is
mindfulness expert Jay Shetty.
733
00:26:38,064 --> 00:26:40,233
He's here to talk
about his new partnership
734
00:26:40,333 --> 00:26:43,203
with the meditation app Calm.
Jay Shetty,
735
00:26:43,303 --> 00:26:45,372
-welcome to The Daily Show.
-Trevor, thanks for having me.
736
00:26:45,472 --> 00:26:47,073
Many people see your face, and
they go like, "I know this guy.
737
00:26:47,173 --> 00:26:48,508
"I know him
from Instagram maybe.
738
00:26:48,608 --> 00:26:50,043
"You know, I know him
from having conversations
739
00:26:50,143 --> 00:26:52,112
with Oprah or with Ellen, or..."
740
00:26:52,212 --> 00:26:56,149
You-you very quickly have become
the face of, I mean, calm
741
00:26:56,249 --> 00:26:57,817
for many people, you know,
742
00:26:57,918 --> 00:27:00,820
and-and you've talked about
Thinking Like a Monk,
743
00:27:00,921 --> 00:27:02,656
your New York Times
Best-Selling book.
744
00:27:02,756 --> 00:27:03,924
So I wanted to know this.
745
00:27:04,024 --> 00:27:06,126
Number one--
what does a monk think like?
746
00:27:06,226 --> 00:27:08,295
I know it's a whole book.
What does a monk think like?
747
00:27:08,395 --> 00:27:11,398
And secondly, when was
the last time you got angry?
748
00:27:11,498 --> 00:27:14,067
So, one of the first things
that I realized
749
00:27:14,167 --> 00:27:17,904
when I trained to become a monk
is that monks are very normal.
750
00:27:18,004 --> 00:27:19,206
They're...
We're all normal people.
751
00:27:19,306 --> 00:27:20,207
They come
from normal backgrounds.
752
00:27:20,307 --> 00:27:21,675
They weren't born monks.
753
00:27:21,775 --> 00:27:23,810
-Like, you don't come out
of the womb as a monk. -Uh-huh.
754
00:27:23,910 --> 00:27:27,547
And so, a big part of that
was learning new mindsets.
755
00:27:27,647 --> 00:27:30,283
So, we were on a 72-hour
train journey
756
00:27:30,383 --> 00:27:32,586
-from the north of India
to the south of India. -Okay.
757
00:27:32,686 --> 00:27:34,754
Now, as a monk,
you don't travel in first class,
758
00:27:34,854 --> 00:27:36,122
you don't travel in economy.
759
00:27:36,223 --> 00:27:38,692
You travel
in the lowest class possible.
760
00:27:38,792 --> 00:27:40,260
-So we're on the train.
-Wait. Why?
761
00:27:40,360 --> 00:27:43,196
Because you're trying
to have as least attachment
762
00:27:43,296 --> 00:27:46,800
-to your surroundings and
least-least desires. -Wow. Okay.
763
00:27:46,900 --> 00:27:49,202
Now, I stop
at the different stops,
764
00:27:49,302 --> 00:27:51,705
I get off, and I meditate,
and I get back on the train,
765
00:27:51,805 --> 00:27:53,306
-and my teacher notices that.
-Mm-hmm.
766
00:27:53,406 --> 00:27:56,643
And he says to me, "Why are you
not meditating on the train?"
767
00:27:56,743 --> 00:27:58,144
And he said, "Well..."
Well, I said,
768
00:27:58,245 --> 00:28:01,114
"It's so hectic on the train,
but the stop is peaceful."
769
00:28:01,147 --> 00:28:03,383
-Mm-hmm. -"So I get off
at the stop, I do my meditation,
770
00:28:03,483 --> 00:28:04,985
and I get back on."
771
00:28:05,118 --> 00:28:09,522
And he said, "Do you think
life is peaceful like the stop,
772
00:28:09,623 --> 00:28:12,259
or is it difficult
like the train?"
773
00:28:12,359 --> 00:28:14,661
And, you know, I'm at,
like, my first week
774
00:28:14,761 --> 00:28:17,731
of monk training right now,
and I said,
775
00:28:17,831 --> 00:28:19,533
"I think
it's difficult like the train."
776
00:28:19,633 --> 00:28:21,568
He said, "Well, that's where
you practice how to meditate."
777
00:28:21,668 --> 00:28:23,169
-Oh, wow.
-So that's how monks think.
778
00:28:23,270 --> 00:28:26,273
-Monks think, how can we be
in the chaos... -Okay.
779
00:28:26,373 --> 00:28:27,874
...be in the clutter,
-Okay.
780
00:28:27,974 --> 00:28:30,844
...but still look
for stillness in that time?
781
00:28:30,944 --> 00:28:32,646
So when was the last time
you got angry?
782
00:28:32,746 --> 00:28:35,081
The last time I got angry would
have to be, probably,
783
00:28:35,181 --> 00:28:36,383
like, a month ago?
784
00:28:36,483 --> 00:28:37,551
-What were you angry about?
-I think I was angry
785
00:28:37,651 --> 00:28:38,885
because I didn't get the
Christmas gift I wanted.
786
00:28:38,985 --> 00:28:40,220
(both laughing)
787
00:28:40,320 --> 00:28:42,255
-This is the opposite of...
-Totally the opposite.
788
00:28:42,355 --> 00:28:43,490
-What would your monk
teacher say about that? -Oh,
789
00:28:43,590 --> 00:28:45,759
they would be very, very
disappointed, because--
790
00:28:45,859 --> 00:28:46,993
-Okay, okay, okay.
-Yeah.
791
00:28:47,093 --> 00:28:48,094
So this is, this is an
interesting life that
792
00:28:48,195 --> 00:28:49,529
you've lived, Jay, because, I
mean,
793
00:28:49,629 --> 00:28:50,997
you decided, "You know what,
I'm not going to go straight
794
00:28:51,097 --> 00:28:53,166
into business, I'm gonna go to
the world of being a monk."
795
00:28:53,266 --> 00:28:56,703
-What stopped you from
continuing the monk life? -Yeah.
796
00:28:56,803 --> 00:28:58,238
You know? Like, don't most
go, like,
797
00:28:58,338 --> 00:28:59,439
"I don't want for anything,
798
00:28:59,539 --> 00:29:00,840
"I don't need anything,
799
00:29:00,941 --> 00:29:02,108
-no attachment."
-Yes.
800
00:29:02,175 --> 00:29:03,610
And that's it. Where--
It feels like you've gone
801
00:29:03,710 --> 00:29:04,844
the opposite way.
You've gone monk,
802
00:29:04,945 --> 00:29:06,146
but then I also
don't mind balling.
803
00:29:06,246 --> 00:29:08,148
(Jay laughs)
804
00:29:08,248 --> 00:29:09,549
So, most of my
friends are still monks,
805
00:29:09,649 --> 00:29:12,419
and a lot of them have
continued to be lifelong monks,
806
00:29:12,519 --> 00:29:14,788
And, for me, it
was a purpose.
807
00:29:14,888 --> 00:29:16,289
The way we were trained was
that
808
00:29:16,389 --> 00:29:19,659
the greatest gift, or the
greatest focus of a human
809
00:29:19,759 --> 00:29:21,728
-is, "How can I serve others?"
-Oh...
810
00:29:21,828 --> 00:29:25,565
How can I best help others
and serve others?
811
00:29:25,665 --> 00:29:29,135
And so, when I shared this doubt
that I had with my teachers,
812
00:29:29,202 --> 00:29:31,538
they said to me,
"Jay, we feel the same way.
813
00:29:31,638 --> 00:29:33,974
We feel that you'd better serve
if you were to move on."
814
00:29:34,074 --> 00:29:35,642
I think that was a nice way
of saying, "We're done."
815
00:29:35,742 --> 00:29:37,310
"We're kicking you out." Yeah.
That seems like a nice way...
816
00:29:37,410 --> 00:29:38,645
It was like,
"It's not you, it's me."
817
00:29:38,745 --> 00:29:39,980
-Like a relationship breakup.
-Okay.
818
00:29:40,080 --> 00:29:41,414
But-but they agreed with me.
819
00:29:41,514 --> 00:29:43,984
And now when I still go
and study with my teachers
820
00:29:44,084 --> 00:29:46,419
or I-I meet with them
or I travel with them,
821
00:29:46,519 --> 00:29:49,656
it's really beautiful
to see how they've continued
822
00:29:49,756 --> 00:29:51,658
with that completely
detached lifestyle,
823
00:29:51,758 --> 00:29:53,760
but they're so kind and gracious
824
00:29:53,860 --> 00:29:56,530
with how they allow me
to be my true self
825
00:29:56,630 --> 00:29:58,698
and allow me to serve
in that way.
826
00:29:58,798 --> 00:30:00,100
And I think that's
what we're all looking for.
827
00:30:00,200 --> 00:30:02,502
We're looking to be accepted
for who we truly are,
828
00:30:02,602 --> 00:30:03,970
-to accept ourselves.
-Yes. Yes.
829
00:30:04,104 --> 00:30:07,007
But use what we've been given
to serve and help others.
830
00:30:07,107 --> 00:30:09,409
Let's talk a little bit
about the Calm app, then.
831
00:30:09,509 --> 00:30:10,977
I think we all want to become
more present.
832
00:30:11,111 --> 00:30:13,380
We all want to be less shaken
by the world every single day.
833
00:30:13,480 --> 00:30:16,583
And then you get apps
on your phone
834
00:30:16,683 --> 00:30:20,020
that are helping you
to disconnect from your phone
835
00:30:20,120 --> 00:30:21,521
and find the calm.
836
00:30:21,621 --> 00:30:23,723
Like, there is
a paradox in that.
837
00:30:23,823 --> 00:30:25,792
And-and you're teaming up
with Calm now
838
00:30:25,892 --> 00:30:30,297
to-to essentially curate
experiences around mindfulness.
839
00:30:30,397 --> 00:30:32,766
Is that in and of itself
not a paradox?
840
00:30:32,866 --> 00:30:34,501
Are we not living in a world
where you should be going like,
841
00:30:34,601 --> 00:30:36,770
"No phones.
I'm just gonna email you guys
842
00:30:36,870 --> 00:30:38,371
"something
that you can read once,
843
00:30:38,471 --> 00:30:39,739
and then you're gonna know
how to meditate"?
844
00:30:39,839 --> 00:30:41,341
It's a massive paradox.
I mean, Trevor,
845
00:30:41,441 --> 00:30:43,210
if you're to come with me
to India tomorrow,
846
00:30:43,310 --> 00:30:44,711
and we're gonna pack our bags,
three months,
847
00:30:44,811 --> 00:30:47,347
not use our phones, we'll do
a little retreat together,
848
00:30:47,447 --> 00:30:49,216
-I'm in. -I would do that
if the people here
849
00:30:49,316 --> 00:30:50,617
-didn't pay me. But yeah.
-You would... I know.
850
00:30:50,717 --> 00:30:52,085
-That's the problem, right?
-I would do that. Yes.
851
00:30:52,118 --> 00:30:53,453
-It's never enough.
-(laughs)
852
00:30:53,553 --> 00:30:56,690
And, so, I understand
that people can't just leave.
853
00:30:56,790 --> 00:30:58,258
-Right.
-They can't just stop.
854
00:30:58,358 --> 00:31:00,427
Everyone has bills to pay.
Everyone has lives to lead.
855
00:31:00,527 --> 00:31:03,496
Everyone has children or family,
whatever it may be.
856
00:31:03,597 --> 00:31:05,632
So I think we have
to meet people where they are,
857
00:31:05,732 --> 00:31:07,367
and to me,
that's what the apps do.
858
00:31:07,467 --> 00:31:08,935
You're meeting someone
where they are
859
00:31:09,102 --> 00:31:10,136
in a world that they understand,
860
00:31:10,237 --> 00:31:12,472
in a world
that they can contextualize.
861
00:31:12,572 --> 00:31:14,908
And if we can create a platform
862
00:31:15,008 --> 00:31:17,143
whereby,
for seven minutes a day,
863
00:31:17,244 --> 00:31:20,580
you're using your phone
to invest in yourself,
864
00:31:20,680 --> 00:31:22,482
you're using your phone
to take time for yourself,
865
00:31:22,582 --> 00:31:24,217
then I think
that's a great starting point.
866
00:31:24,317 --> 00:31:25,619
And that's what it is.
It's a starting point.
867
00:31:25,719 --> 00:31:26,987
What do you think
the biggest misconception
868
00:31:27,120 --> 00:31:28,388
around meditation is?
869
00:31:28,488 --> 00:31:30,857
I think the biggest
misconception around meditation
870
00:31:30,957 --> 00:31:33,260
is that you have to change
what you're wearing,
871
00:31:33,360 --> 00:31:34,794
you have to change
where you're sitting
872
00:31:34,895 --> 00:31:37,063
and that you have to silence
the mind.
873
00:31:37,130 --> 00:31:38,565
I think people are trying
to quiet their mind.
874
00:31:38,665 --> 00:31:40,767
They're trying to stop
everything from happening.
875
00:31:40,867 --> 00:31:43,703
And meditation's not about
stopping-- it's about observing.
876
00:31:43,803 --> 00:31:45,539
It's about sitting with.
877
00:31:45,639 --> 00:31:48,074
It's about understanding.
It's about being curious.
878
00:31:48,108 --> 00:31:50,977
You now live in, I mean,
the heart of capitalism.
879
00:31:51,077 --> 00:31:53,213
You know? It's the exact
opposite of what you did
880
00:31:53,313 --> 00:31:54,881
-for three years in India.
-Yeah.
881
00:31:54,981 --> 00:31:57,083
You know, there's money.
There's money to be made.
882
00:31:57,183 --> 00:31:59,085
There's a balance
between giving a thing
883
00:31:59,152 --> 00:32:00,720
and getting a thing in return.
884
00:32:00,820 --> 00:32:02,989
I even think about this
with, like, meditation
885
00:32:03,089 --> 00:32:04,658
and therapy sometimes. I go,
886
00:32:04,758 --> 00:32:06,860
"It's amazing that the thing
most people need the most
887
00:32:06,960 --> 00:32:08,428
is the thing
that you have to pay for."
888
00:32:08,528 --> 00:32:11,097
So, like, how do you balance
that conundrum
889
00:32:11,198 --> 00:32:13,099
in a world where you're trying
to do for others
890
00:32:13,166 --> 00:32:14,668
but then it seems like
sometimes it can only be
891
00:32:14,768 --> 00:32:16,169
-for something in exchange?
-Yeah,
892
00:32:16,269 --> 00:32:18,104
one of the biggest things that
I've definitely tried to do--
893
00:32:18,138 --> 00:32:19,539
and that's why the partnership
with Calm is awesome--
894
00:32:19,639 --> 00:32:22,175
is we've tried to provide
this service at scale.
895
00:32:22,275 --> 00:32:23,410
So, right now, if you sign up,
896
00:32:23,510 --> 00:32:25,412
you can sign up for $42
for the whole year.
897
00:32:25,512 --> 00:32:27,614
-Okay.
-So that's, like, $3.50 a month.
898
00:32:27,714 --> 00:32:29,115
-Okay. -Right?
Like, that's the average.
899
00:32:29,216 --> 00:32:30,450
So it's fully accessible.
900
00:32:30,550 --> 00:32:32,919
We've tried to make it
as affordable and accessible
901
00:32:33,053 --> 00:32:34,321
for each and every human
on the planet.
902
00:32:34,421 --> 00:32:36,223
-Because that's the true desire.
-Mm-hmm.
903
00:32:36,323 --> 00:32:38,191
But the way
I grapple it with that is
904
00:32:38,291 --> 00:32:40,861
I really enjoy being
in the battle
905
00:32:40,961 --> 00:32:43,063
and realizing how weak I am
906
00:32:43,163 --> 00:32:44,865
and seeing my ego arise,
907
00:32:44,965 --> 00:32:47,067
seeing my attachment to money
come through
908
00:32:47,167 --> 00:32:50,103
and then having to process it
and work on it
909
00:32:50,203 --> 00:32:53,073
rather than be so removed
that I believe I'm pure.
910
00:32:53,106 --> 00:32:56,209
So I'd rather be reminded
of my flaws and impurities
911
00:32:56,309 --> 00:32:58,545
and have to grapple with that
on a daily basis
912
00:32:58,645 --> 00:33:01,348
to make me hold on
to higher ideals
913
00:33:01,448 --> 00:33:02,816
than be so far removed from them
914
00:33:02,916 --> 00:33:05,785
that I walk around feeling
like I've conquered my mind
915
00:33:05,886 --> 00:33:07,587
but, in reality, I haven't.
916
00:33:07,687 --> 00:33:09,656
So I really enjoy that paradox.
917
00:33:09,756 --> 00:33:11,091
-Man.
-(laughs)
918
00:33:11,124 --> 00:33:12,292
It is quite the paradox.
919
00:33:12,392 --> 00:33:13,827
Um, I could talk to you
for hours about this.
920
00:33:13,927 --> 00:33:15,195
But thank you so much
for joining me on the show.
921
00:33:15,295 --> 00:33:16,696
-Oh, thank you, man.
-And, uh, congratulations
922
00:33:16,796 --> 00:33:17,898
on all of your success.
923
00:33:17,998 --> 00:33:19,599
Hopefully we'll, uh...
we'll have you again
924
00:33:19,699 --> 00:33:20,800
when the midterms are on
925
00:33:20,901 --> 00:33:22,435
and then we'll test
all of these theories
926
00:33:22,536 --> 00:33:23,904
-to help America calm down.
-I'd love that.
927
00:33:24,004 --> 00:33:25,272
-Thank you so much, Jay.
-I love that. Thank you, Trevor.
928
00:33:25,372 --> 00:33:26,473
-Thank you.
-Appreciate it.
929
00:33:26,573 --> 00:33:28,141
Be sure to check out
The Daily Jay,
930
00:33:28,241 --> 00:33:29,976
available exclusively on Calm.
931
00:33:30,110 --> 00:33:31,177
All right,
we're gonna take a quick break,
932
00:33:31,278 --> 00:33:33,513
but we'll be right back
after this.
933
00:33:37,389 --> 00:33:38,657
Well, that's our show
for tonight. But before we go,
934
00:33:38,757 --> 00:33:41,260
this weekend was the 49th
anniversary of Roe v. Wade.
935
00:33:41,360 --> 00:33:42,962
And while it is still law,
936
00:33:43,062 --> 00:33:44,330
in much of the country,
937
00:33:44,430 --> 00:33:46,832
women's reproductive rights
are being threatened.
938
00:33:46,932 --> 00:33:48,867
But Planned Parenthood
is on the ground,
939
00:33:48,968 --> 00:33:51,136
helping deliver
vital reproductive health care,
940
00:33:51,236 --> 00:33:54,473
sex education and information
to millions of people
941
00:33:54,573 --> 00:33:56,842
not just in the United States
but worldwide.
942
00:33:56,942 --> 00:33:59,211
So if you want to support them
in their mission,
943
00:33:59,311 --> 00:34:01,313
then please donate
at the link below.
944
00:34:01,413 --> 00:34:03,616
Until tomorrow,
stay safe out there,
945
00:34:03,716 --> 00:34:05,651
get your vaccine and, remember,
946
00:34:05,751 --> 00:34:09,021
just because James Bond
is in the trailer
947
00:34:09,121 --> 00:34:11,090
doesn't mean he's in the movie.
948
00:34:11,190 --> 00:34:13,926
Now here it is,
Your Moment of Zen.