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00:00:01,401 --> 00:00:03,136
The, uh, you know the Spotify
Wrapped thing that came out?
2
00:00:03,237 --> 00:00:04,404
They did that with emojis,
for no reason.
3
00:00:04,505 --> 00:00:05,772
Like, no one asked for it.
And they were like,
4
00:00:05,873 --> 00:00:08,308
"Here are
the most popular emojis ever."
5
00:00:08,408 --> 00:00:10,544
And, like, one
of the most popular is, like,
6
00:00:10,644 --> 00:00:11,945
the crying face ones.
7
00:00:12,045 --> 00:00:13,780
But it's, like,
all the crying ones.
8
00:00:13,881 --> 00:00:15,816
Like, crying laughing,
crying crying,
9
00:00:15,916 --> 00:00:17,251
sort of crying, cry...
10
00:00:17,351 --> 00:00:19,319
Like, if... those crying things
are confusing.
11
00:00:19,419 --> 00:00:20,621
Do you know what I mean?
12
00:00:20,721 --> 00:00:22,523
'Cause, like, I can't tell
which ones are, like,
13
00:00:22,623 --> 00:00:24,324
crying crying any...
you know what I mean?
14
00:00:24,424 --> 00:00:26,159
Like, people will be like,
"My grandma died.
15
00:00:26,260 --> 00:00:29,096
Ha-ha-ha-ha!"
That's what it seems like.
16
00:00:29,196 --> 00:00:30,631
It always seems wrong.
17
00:00:30,731 --> 00:00:32,633
Also, like,
you can't have a best emojis
18
00:00:32,733 --> 00:00:34,434
or, like, the most used,
'cause they always put
19
00:00:34,535 --> 00:00:37,037
the recently used ones up front,
20
00:00:37,137 --> 00:00:39,473
and the reason we use them
is 'cause we're lazy.
21
00:00:39,573 --> 00:00:41,408
Like, that's not actually
an accurate representation
22
00:00:41,508 --> 00:00:43,277
of what you think of, like,
your friend's spaghetti.
23
00:00:43,377 --> 00:00:45,245
You know what I'm saying?
You just chose that emoji
24
00:00:45,345 --> 00:00:46,380
'cause it was there.
25
00:00:46,480 --> 00:00:47,881
You're like, "Yeah." Hot eyes.
26
00:00:47,981 --> 00:00:49,716
That's not how you feel
about the spaghetti.
27
00:00:49,816 --> 00:00:51,752
You're just not gonna go look
for spaghetti deep down.
28
00:00:51,852 --> 00:00:53,754
You're like:
I'm just lazy. Put hot eyes,
29
00:00:53,854 --> 00:00:56,523
and then, like, the skull.
That's how I felt.
30
00:00:56,623 --> 00:01:00,227
The spaghetti was loving
and it killed. I don't know.
31
00:01:00,327 --> 00:01:02,963
My favorite emoji is
the praying hands one.
32
00:01:03,063 --> 00:01:05,832
I think it's the most versatile.
You can use it for anything.
33
00:01:05,933 --> 00:01:08,268
You can be like:
Hey, girl, you up?
34
00:01:08,368 --> 00:01:10,838
You know what I mean?
You can be like: Hey.
35
00:01:10,938 --> 00:01:13,674
I heard your grandmother
passed away.
36
00:01:13,774 --> 00:01:15,075
You know? Yeah.
37
00:01:15,108 --> 00:01:17,077
She up?
38
00:01:17,177 --> 00:01:19,279
ANNOUNCER: Coming to you
from the heart of Times Square
39
00:01:19,379 --> 00:01:22,482
in New York City,
the only city in America,
40
00:01:22,583 --> 00:01:24,451
it's The Daily Show.
41
00:01:24,551 --> 00:01:27,487
Tonight, hasta la vista, Merkel,
42
00:01:27,588 --> 00:01:30,524
the power couples of 2021,
43
00:01:30,624 --> 00:01:33,594
and William Jackson Harper.
44
00:01:33,694 --> 00:01:37,998
This is the Daily Show
with Trevor Noah!
45
00:01:38,098 --> 00:01:39,666
Hey! What's going on, everybody?
46
00:01:39,766 --> 00:01:41,502
Welcome to The Daily Show.
I'm Trevor Noah.
47
00:01:41,602 --> 00:01:44,338
Let's jump
straight into today's headlines.
48
00:01:44,438 --> 00:01:46,440
♪ ♪
49
00:01:46,540 --> 00:01:51,011
We kick things off with Omicron,
the worst Transformer ever.
50
00:01:51,111 --> 00:01:53,614
So it was a car
and then it became a virus?
51
00:01:53,714 --> 00:01:55,449
Yesterday,
the first case was identified
52
00:01:55,549 --> 00:01:57,317
right here in the United States,
53
00:01:57,417 --> 00:02:00,320
and it didn't take long
for the sequel to come out.
54
00:02:00,420 --> 00:02:02,756
We do begin this hour with
breaking news on the pandemic.
55
00:02:02,856 --> 00:02:05,225
The second confirmed case
of the Omicron variant
56
00:02:05,325 --> 00:02:07,494
in the United States
has just been confirmed,
57
00:02:07,594 --> 00:02:09,296
this one in Minnesota.
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00:02:09,396 --> 00:02:11,064
We don't know much
about the patient yet,
59
00:02:11,098 --> 00:02:13,800
except that they had
only traveled domestically.
60
00:02:13,901 --> 00:02:17,304
NEWSMAN: Health officials say
the man developed mild symptoms
61
00:02:17,404 --> 00:02:20,607
on November 22 after going
to an anime convention
62
00:02:20,707 --> 00:02:22,342
in New York City.
63
00:02:22,442 --> 00:02:24,678
53,000 people attended
that event
64
00:02:24,778 --> 00:02:27,314
between November 19
and the 21st.
65
00:02:27,414 --> 00:02:29,082
Well, now the city wants
those attendees
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00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:30,851
to get a COVID test
immediately,
67
00:02:30,951 --> 00:02:33,353
wear face masks,
and practice social distancing
68
00:02:33,453 --> 00:02:35,923
until they get
their test results back.
69
00:02:36,089 --> 00:02:38,659
That's right.
One of the first U.S. cases
70
00:02:38,759 --> 00:02:41,995
of the new COVID variant
may be an adult man
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00:02:42,095 --> 00:02:44,364
who attended
an anime convention.
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00:02:44,464 --> 00:02:45,866
I mean, which is good.
73
00:02:45,966 --> 00:02:48,735
At least we know that it's
not transmitted via eye contact.
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00:02:48,836 --> 00:02:50,504
No, but I'm kidding,
I'm kidding, I'm kidding.
75
00:02:50,604 --> 00:02:51,839
I love anime. Honestly, I do.
76
00:02:51,939 --> 00:02:53,407
In fact,
when I heard about this,
77
00:02:53,507 --> 00:02:56,977
I wondered if the guy
got infected in anime style.
78
00:02:57,110 --> 00:02:58,679
(groans)
It's Omicron!
79
00:02:58,779 --> 00:03:01,648
Its power is stronger than any
other variant I've ever seen!
80
00:03:01,748 --> 00:03:03,350
It's got so many spikes!
81
00:03:03,450 --> 00:03:05,719
Aah! I should have gotten
a booster shot!
82
00:03:05,819 --> 00:03:08,121
Oh, if I don't breathe,
maybe I can survive.
83
00:03:08,222 --> 00:03:10,390
Oh... ooh...
84
00:03:10,490 --> 00:03:12,759
ooh... ooh...
85
00:03:16,063 --> 00:03:17,731
But, people, please remember
this, please remember this.
86
00:03:17,831 --> 00:03:19,066
We shouldn't be surprised
87
00:03:19,099 --> 00:03:21,702
when we find
more and more cases, okay?
88
00:03:21,802 --> 00:03:24,338
Because Omicron is like
those microscopic bugs
89
00:03:24,438 --> 00:03:25,906
that live in your eyelashes.
90
00:03:26,073 --> 00:03:29,309
Even if you don't see them,
you know that they're there.
91
00:03:29,409 --> 00:03:31,345
Yeah. Laughing at you.
92
00:03:31,445 --> 00:03:34,081
About all the spiders that crawl
into your mouth while you sleep.
93
00:03:34,147 --> 00:03:36,149
And also, don't forget,
don't forget this--
94
00:03:36,250 --> 00:03:39,353
we have no idea if Omicron
is actually that bad.
95
00:03:39,453 --> 00:03:41,321
But what I mean by that is,
we don't know
96
00:03:41,421 --> 00:03:43,323
if it might spread more easily
or, you know,
97
00:03:43,423 --> 00:03:45,092
we don't know
if it'll be more deadly--
98
00:03:45,192 --> 00:03:46,760
it's just too early to know.
99
00:03:46,860 --> 00:03:48,595
And I hate to sound like
someone describing
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00:03:48,695 --> 00:03:51,164
every streaming show right now,
but you got to stick with it
101
00:03:51,265 --> 00:03:53,634
past the first couple of weeks
and see where it goes.
102
00:03:53,734 --> 00:03:56,503
You know? But anyway,
let's move on from COVID
103
00:03:56,603 --> 00:03:58,572
to America's
other national pastime--
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00:03:58,672 --> 00:04:00,174
baseball.
105
00:04:00,274 --> 00:04:02,176
The only sport
you can think about to yourself
106
00:04:02,276 --> 00:04:03,777
to stop from orgasming.
107
00:04:03,877 --> 00:04:05,045
Yeah.
108
00:04:05,078 --> 00:04:07,214
Sorry, hockey. You too sexy.
109
00:04:07,314 --> 00:04:09,149
In some ways,
being a baseball player
110
00:04:09,249 --> 00:04:10,851
is unlike
any other job in the world.
111
00:04:10,951 --> 00:04:12,953
I mean, for one thing,
if your entire office
112
00:04:13,053 --> 00:04:14,922
got into a brawl,
you wouldn't go back to work
113
00:04:15,055 --> 00:04:16,790
five minutes later
like nothing happened.
114
00:04:16,890 --> 00:04:20,661
But also, being a baseball
player is still a job.
115
00:04:20,761 --> 00:04:22,863
Which means that sometimes
they get into disagreements
116
00:04:22,963 --> 00:04:24,965
with their bosses.
117
00:04:25,065 --> 00:04:26,967
And now
one of those disagreements
118
00:04:27,067 --> 00:04:30,070
has shut down the entire league.
119
00:04:30,170 --> 00:04:32,139
Breaking news from the world
of sports overnight.
120
00:04:32,239 --> 00:04:34,074
For the first time
in more than 25 years,
121
00:04:34,107 --> 00:04:36,777
Major League Baseball
is now in a work stoppage.
122
00:04:36,877 --> 00:04:40,147
Owners locking out players
after months of failed talks
123
00:04:40,247 --> 00:04:41,782
toward a new labor contract.
124
00:04:41,882 --> 00:04:43,450
The biggest economic issues
right now
125
00:04:43,550 --> 00:04:44,918
between MLB and the union
126
00:04:45,085 --> 00:04:48,222
have to do with when players
become free agents
127
00:04:48,322 --> 00:04:50,090
and how much they get paid.
128
00:04:50,190 --> 00:04:51,425
NEWSMAN:
Players Association
129
00:04:51,525 --> 00:04:54,361
wants young stars
to get paid sooner
130
00:04:54,461 --> 00:04:56,597
and not be restricted to teams
131
00:04:56,697 --> 00:04:58,332
for the first six years
of their career.
132
00:04:58,432 --> 00:05:00,400
NEWSMAN 2: Now, the lockout
freezes all league business
133
00:05:00,501 --> 00:05:01,602
until an agreement is reached.
134
00:05:01,702 --> 00:05:02,803
That means no trades,
135
00:05:02,903 --> 00:05:04,771
no more free agent signings,
136
00:05:04,872 --> 00:05:07,307
and no players are allowed
inside club facilities.
137
00:05:07,407 --> 00:05:11,044
And if you go to MLB.com
or your favorite team's website,
138
00:05:11,078 --> 00:05:14,181
you're gonna notice
all images and videos of players
139
00:05:14,281 --> 00:05:17,184
have been completely removed.
140
00:05:17,284 --> 00:05:20,120
They took
all the players' photos
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00:05:20,220 --> 00:05:22,356
off the MLB website.
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00:05:22,456 --> 00:05:25,092
You know who's feeling great
about this right now, yeah?
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00:05:25,192 --> 00:05:27,694
Anyone
who collects baseball cards.
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00:05:27,794 --> 00:05:29,062
"Well, well, well,
145
00:05:29,096 --> 00:05:30,464
"you guys said
there was no reason
146
00:05:30,564 --> 00:05:33,066
"for me to have a photo
of Albert Pujols,
147
00:05:33,133 --> 00:05:35,235
but now I'm the only guy
who knows what he looks like."
148
00:05:35,335 --> 00:05:37,871
(laughs)
149
00:05:37,971 --> 00:05:40,641
Same time, though, this is
all happening in the off-season,
150
00:05:40,741 --> 00:05:42,109
so there's plenty of time
for them
151
00:05:42,209 --> 00:05:44,178
to work out their differences
before the season starts.
152
00:05:44,278 --> 00:05:46,280
You know, this is
like a haunted house owner
153
00:05:46,380 --> 00:05:48,081
getting tough
with the employees in July.
154
00:05:48,115 --> 00:05:49,683
It doesn't really matter.
155
00:05:49,783 --> 00:05:51,485
And you know they're gonna
work something out,
156
00:05:51,585 --> 00:05:53,453
because both sides
need each other.
157
00:05:53,554 --> 00:05:57,124
Like, the MLB, they can't go out
and hire regular people.
158
00:05:57,224 --> 00:05:59,459
We all saw how that
turned out with 50 Cent.
159
00:05:59,560 --> 00:06:02,196
And baseball players,
they have no skills
160
00:06:02,296 --> 00:06:04,164
that translate to other jobs.
161
00:06:04,264 --> 00:06:07,034
"Yeah,
I'm looking for a position
162
00:06:07,134 --> 00:06:08,602
"where I can stand around
doing nothing
163
00:06:08,702 --> 00:06:10,737
"for most of the day,
but then every 20 minutes,
164
00:06:10,838 --> 00:06:12,873
"something comes at my head
really fast.
165
00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:15,042
"Yeah. Also, I want to be able
to slap anyone's ass
166
00:06:15,142 --> 00:06:16,476
whenever I like."
167
00:06:16,577 --> 00:06:18,445
All right,
let's move on to our top story.
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00:06:18,545 --> 00:06:20,514
It's about Germany,
169
00:06:20,614 --> 00:06:22,482
the country
whose idea of a good time
170
00:06:22,583 --> 00:06:24,384
is fermented cabbage.
171
00:06:24,484 --> 00:06:26,486
Mmm. Das ist wunderbar.
172
00:06:26,587 --> 00:06:29,056
For nearly two decades,
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00:06:29,089 --> 00:06:33,060
Germany has been led
by just one person.
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00:06:33,093 --> 00:06:35,062
But today,
175
00:06:35,162 --> 00:06:38,365
she said
her final auf Wiedersehen.
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00:06:38,465 --> 00:06:39,666
NEWSWOMAN:
She is arguably
177
00:06:39,766 --> 00:06:41,735
the most powerful woman
in the world,
178
00:06:41,835 --> 00:06:44,104
but now,
after 16 years at the helm
179
00:06:44,204 --> 00:06:46,507
of one of the world's
largest economies,
180
00:06:46,607 --> 00:06:49,943
Angela Merkel is leaving
Germany's highest office.
181
00:06:50,077 --> 00:06:52,212
And the stakes
couldn't be higher.
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00:06:52,312 --> 00:06:55,148
Who will provide the stability
and economic success
183
00:06:55,249 --> 00:06:56,750
she has overseen?
184
00:06:56,850 --> 00:06:58,552
NEWSWOMAN 2: You know
who really finds it hard
185
00:06:58,652 --> 00:07:01,021
to imagine German politics
after this election?
186
00:07:01,088 --> 00:07:02,623
Generation Merkel,
187
00:07:02,723 --> 00:07:05,459
Germans who've never known
another prime minister
188
00:07:05,559 --> 00:07:07,694
their whole young lives.
189
00:07:07,794 --> 00:07:09,429
NEWSMAN:
They call her Mutti or Mom.
190
00:07:09,530 --> 00:07:11,698
Now, as Mutti
is leaving the chancellery,
191
00:07:11,798 --> 00:07:13,867
Germany is
out of its comfort zone.
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00:07:14,034 --> 00:07:15,402
NEWSWOMAN 3:
She leaves by choice,
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00:07:15,502 --> 00:07:19,173
still enjoying a remarkable
70% approval rating.
194
00:07:19,273 --> 00:07:21,108
NEWSWOMAN 4:
As her 16-year tenure
195
00:07:21,208 --> 00:07:23,043
as chancellor comes to a close,
196
00:07:23,076 --> 00:07:25,379
Germany celebrated
her time in office
197
00:07:25,479 --> 00:07:28,081
with
a traditional military ceremony.
198
00:07:28,182 --> 00:07:30,050
♪ ♪
199
00:07:30,083 --> 00:07:32,319
-Yo, Germany, what the (bleep)?
-(laughter)
200
00:07:32,419 --> 00:07:35,556
Yo, am I the only one who
picked up the Nazi vibes there?
201
00:07:35,656 --> 00:07:37,057
The torches and shit?
202
00:07:37,124 --> 00:07:38,725
Yo, you guys better stop
before you reach Poland.
203
00:07:38,825 --> 00:07:41,061
We're watching you.
Just casually like,
204
00:07:41,094 --> 00:07:43,497
"We do this all the time."
No, you don't!
205
00:07:43,597 --> 00:07:45,065
Anyway, it's pretty crazy
206
00:07:45,132 --> 00:07:48,068
that Merkel was in power
for 16 years.
207
00:07:48,135 --> 00:07:51,238
I mean, to give you some
perspective on how long that is,
208
00:07:51,338 --> 00:07:53,807
when Merkel
first became chancellor,
209
00:07:53,907 --> 00:07:56,276
Pharrell Williams
looked like this.
210
00:07:56,376 --> 00:07:58,212
And now when she's leaving,
211
00:07:58,312 --> 00:08:01,114
Pharrell looks like this.
212
00:08:01,215 --> 00:08:02,583
Okay, that wasn't very helpful,
213
00:08:02,683 --> 00:08:05,252
but a lot of time has passed
is what I'm trying to say.
214
00:08:05,352 --> 00:08:07,588
And what's really remarkable
is that after all that time,
215
00:08:07,688 --> 00:08:09,890
she still has
a 70% approval rating.
216
00:08:10,023 --> 00:08:12,025
Guys, usually the only time
a world leader leaves
217
00:08:12,125 --> 00:08:13,460
with that high
of an approval rating
218
00:08:13,560 --> 00:08:15,462
is because they killed everyone
that didn't approve.
219
00:08:15,562 --> 00:08:17,264
In fact,
I feel bad for the chancellor
220
00:08:17,364 --> 00:08:20,334
who has to replace her
and try to win over all the kids
221
00:08:20,434 --> 00:08:22,569
who've only known Angela
in their lives.
222
00:08:22,669 --> 00:08:24,805
You know? It's like
they're getting a new stepdad.
223
00:08:24,905 --> 00:08:28,208
"You can't tell me what to do!
You're not my real chancellor!"
224
00:08:28,308 --> 00:08:31,078
"I know I can never replace
your chancellor,
225
00:08:31,178 --> 00:08:34,548
but maybe, just maybe,
I can be your friend."
226
00:08:34,648 --> 00:08:36,183
Now,
through her 16 years in power,
227
00:08:36,283 --> 00:08:38,485
Merkel has never been
the type of leader
228
00:08:38,585 --> 00:08:40,053
to try and grab the headlines.
Never.
229
00:08:40,153 --> 00:08:42,923
In fact, you might be
watching this right now
230
00:08:43,056 --> 00:08:45,792
realizing that even though
she's been around
231
00:08:45,893 --> 00:08:47,427
as long as Grey's Anatomy,
232
00:08:47,528 --> 00:08:49,596
you don't really know much
about her.
233
00:08:49,696 --> 00:08:51,565
Like, where did she come from?
234
00:08:51,665 --> 00:08:55,068
And why is everyone so
freaked out about her leaving?
235
00:08:55,135 --> 00:08:57,337
Well, let's find out
in another installment
236
00:08:57,437 --> 00:09:00,040
of If You Don't Know,
Now You Know.
237
00:09:00,140 --> 00:09:02,109
♪ ♪
238
00:09:07,848 --> 00:09:10,918
Angela Merkel has been one
of the most powerful
239
00:09:11,018 --> 00:09:15,255
and influential people on
the planet for a long time now.
240
00:09:15,355 --> 00:09:19,126
She was even Time's
Person of the Year in 2015,
241
00:09:19,226 --> 00:09:20,694
which is impressive considering
242
00:09:20,794 --> 00:09:23,797
that that was the year Neil
Armstrong walked on the moon.
243
00:09:23,897 --> 00:09:25,465
I think.
244
00:09:25,566 --> 00:09:26,700
Look, I don't really know.
245
00:09:26,800 --> 00:09:28,602
The pandemic
has warped my sense of time.
246
00:09:28,702 --> 00:09:30,604
And-and this is something,
this is something
247
00:09:30,704 --> 00:09:33,173
early in her career that nobody
would have seen coming.
248
00:09:33,273 --> 00:09:35,375
Because when she started out
in politics,
249
00:09:35,475 --> 00:09:38,378
she was underestimated
by everybody.
250
00:09:38,478 --> 00:09:40,747
NEWSWOMAN:
The fall of the Berlin Wall
251
00:09:40,848 --> 00:09:43,417
led to the rise
of her political career.
252
00:09:43,517 --> 00:09:46,053
A shy figure thrown
into the spotlight,
253
00:09:46,153 --> 00:09:48,722
This mousy figure
who blushed readily
254
00:09:48,822 --> 00:09:50,958
and was mocked
as "the milkmaid."
255
00:09:51,058 --> 00:09:52,693
NEWSWOMAN 2:
Merkel had an astonishing rise
256
00:09:52,793 --> 00:09:55,062
through German politics
because her mentor,
257
00:09:55,128 --> 00:09:57,397
the long-serving
Chancellor Helmut Kohl,
258
00:09:57,497 --> 00:09:59,399
had pragmatically needed a woman
259
00:09:59,499 --> 00:10:02,603
and someone from the former
East Germany in his cabinet.
260
00:10:02,703 --> 00:10:04,404
But the political novice
revealed
261
00:10:04,505 --> 00:10:06,273
both a politically lethal streak
262
00:10:06,373 --> 00:10:09,076
and a capacity
to outplay her male rivals.
263
00:10:09,176 --> 00:10:10,577
NEWSMAN: She had a knack
for toppling those
264
00:10:10,677 --> 00:10:12,012
who underestimated her.
265
00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:14,915
Her mentor, the formidable
Chancellor Helmut Kohl,
266
00:10:15,015 --> 00:10:18,085
used to tease her
for her provincial manners.
267
00:10:18,185 --> 00:10:19,586
And yet, within a decade,
268
00:10:19,686 --> 00:10:22,022
she was calling
for his resignation
269
00:10:22,122 --> 00:10:24,324
as he faced allegations
of corruption.
270
00:10:24,424 --> 00:10:25,726
By 2005,
271
00:10:25,826 --> 00:10:28,562
she'd become the country's
first female chancellor.
272
00:10:28,662 --> 00:10:30,163
(translated): Who would
have thought the highest office
273
00:10:30,264 --> 00:10:32,733
would go to a woman so soon?
274
00:10:32,833 --> 00:10:34,635
(applause)
275
00:10:34,735 --> 00:10:36,003
Yeah.
276
00:10:36,103 --> 00:10:40,541
Germany elected a female leader
long before America did.
277
00:10:40,641 --> 00:10:41,942
But, I mean, that's no surprise.
278
00:10:42,042 --> 00:10:45,279
Germans have always embraced
diversity.
279
00:10:45,379 --> 00:10:47,281
Like, you could look back
at the last, say,
280
00:10:47,381 --> 00:10:49,316
76 and a half years
of German history
281
00:10:49,416 --> 00:10:50,984
and you can see
that that's true.
282
00:10:51,084 --> 00:10:53,854
And her rise, her rise
is especially unexpected
283
00:10:53,954 --> 00:10:57,057
considering how little people
thought of her when she started.
284
00:10:57,157 --> 00:11:00,627
I mean, to be the butt of jokes
from her peers,
285
00:11:00,727 --> 00:11:02,095
that must have hurt,
286
00:11:02,196 --> 00:11:04,331
especially because Germans
only make one joke a year
287
00:11:04,431 --> 00:11:06,066
and then they saved it for her?
288
00:11:06,099 --> 00:11:08,468
"Okay, milkmaid,
that was funny, ja?
289
00:11:08,569 --> 00:11:10,337
"Ha-ha, milkmaid.
(laughs)
290
00:11:10,437 --> 00:11:12,406
"Okay, no more laughing!
291
00:11:12,506 --> 00:11:13,807
Back to work."
292
00:11:13,907 --> 00:11:15,709
But if there's one thing
we've learned from movies,
293
00:11:15,809 --> 00:11:18,278
it's that you
should never underestimate
294
00:11:18,378 --> 00:11:21,081
the shy, mousy woman.
295
00:11:21,181 --> 00:11:22,683
I mean, She's All That,
296
00:11:22,783 --> 00:11:24,151
The Devil Wears Prada,
297
00:11:24,251 --> 00:11:26,887
The Blair Witch--
they all ended up winning.
298
00:11:26,987 --> 00:11:28,255
Here's the thing though--
299
00:11:28,355 --> 00:11:30,490
long after she established
herself as a global force,
300
00:11:30,591 --> 00:11:33,594
Merkel still had to contend
with fellow world leaders
301
00:11:33,694 --> 00:11:35,429
who didn't treat her
like an equal.
302
00:11:35,529 --> 00:11:38,165
And, coincidentally,
they were all dudes.
303
00:11:38,265 --> 00:11:40,100
NEWSWOMAN:
Berlusconi arrived at a summit
304
00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:42,503
with his cell phone
plastered to his ear,
305
00:11:42,603 --> 00:11:45,706
leaving his hostess,
German Chancellor Angela Merkel,
306
00:11:45,806 --> 00:11:47,207
on hold.
307
00:11:47,307 --> 00:11:50,444
Chancellor Merkel greeted
other leaders and waited.
308
00:11:50,544 --> 00:11:53,847
After about eight and a half
minutes, she gave up and left.
309
00:11:53,947 --> 00:11:55,849
NEWSMAN: She managed
to reset Germany's relationship
310
00:11:55,949 --> 00:11:57,484
with George W. Bush.
311
00:11:57,584 --> 00:12:01,188
But Bush's warmth and respect
often came off as cloying.
312
00:12:01,288 --> 00:12:04,057
The moment that seemed to sum up
their odd couple relationship,
313
00:12:04,091 --> 00:12:07,794
Bush's over-friendly backrub
at a Saint Petersburg summit.
314
00:12:07,895 --> 00:12:09,930
If President Bush
could be too touchy,
315
00:12:10,063 --> 00:12:14,368
President Trump famously refused
to even shake Merkel's hand.
316
00:12:14,468 --> 00:12:16,503
(shutters clicking)
317
00:12:20,908 --> 00:12:23,210
NEWSMAN 2: Several years ago,
Putin brought a large dog
318
00:12:23,310 --> 00:12:24,645
to a meeting with Merkel,
319
00:12:24,745 --> 00:12:26,280
apparently wanting to test her,
320
00:12:26,380 --> 00:12:28,282
knowing she has a fear of dogs.
321
00:12:28,382 --> 00:12:30,284
She was terrified,
says one analyst,
322
00:12:30,384 --> 00:12:31,618
but didn't flinch.
323
00:12:31,718 --> 00:12:33,620
NEWSMAN 3: She was still able
to joke about it
324
00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:35,422
in fluent Russian.
325
00:12:35,522 --> 00:12:37,157
Goddamn.
326
00:12:37,257 --> 00:12:40,294
I like dogs
and that dog scared me.
327
00:12:40,394 --> 00:12:41,461
I mean, look at the size
of that thing.
328
00:12:41,562 --> 00:12:43,130
It's like an evil Clifford.
329
00:12:43,230 --> 00:12:44,631
And, obviously,
bringing a dog to that meeting
330
00:12:44,731 --> 00:12:46,099
was a dirty move by Putin,
you know?
331
00:12:46,200 --> 00:12:48,235
But, on the other hand, he
didn't cover it in poison first,
332
00:12:48,335 --> 00:12:52,506
so, by Putin's standards,
that is some good diplomacy.
333
00:12:52,606 --> 00:12:54,775
And as for Trump,
a lot of people blamed him.
334
00:12:54,875 --> 00:12:56,276
They were like, "He didn't want
to shake hands with her."
335
00:12:56,376 --> 00:12:57,578
No.
336
00:12:57,678 --> 00:12:59,112
He just learned his lesson.
337
00:12:59,146 --> 00:13:01,381
When he reaches his hand out,
he doesn't know what it'll grab.
338
00:13:01,481 --> 00:13:04,718
I can't control it, folks,
so now I keep it here.
339
00:13:04,818 --> 00:13:05,853
For real, though, the way
340
00:13:05,953 --> 00:13:07,888
these leaders treated her
is embarrassing.
341
00:13:08,055 --> 00:13:09,823
I mean, imagine
being the head of one
342
00:13:09,923 --> 00:13:12,059
of the most politically
powerful countries in the world,
343
00:13:12,125 --> 00:13:14,361
and still,
everyone is treating you
344
00:13:14,461 --> 00:13:16,263
like you're in an episode
of Mad Men.
345
00:13:16,363 --> 00:13:17,631
And you can't even really
do anything about it,
346
00:13:17,731 --> 00:13:19,867
because there's no HR
for world leaders.
347
00:13:19,967 --> 00:13:21,201
What are you going
to do, tell the U.N.
348
00:13:21,301 --> 00:13:22,569
that someone
rubbed your shoulders?
349
00:13:22,669 --> 00:13:24,371
I mean,
they don't even do anything
350
00:13:24,471 --> 00:13:25,839
when there's a genocide.
351
00:13:25,939 --> 00:13:28,575
"we're going to issue
a forceful statement about...
352
00:13:28,675 --> 00:13:30,210
"Sorry. What? It was vetoed?
353
00:13:30,310 --> 00:13:33,146
"Okay, well, we tried. All
right, next up, climate change.
354
00:13:33,247 --> 00:13:36,149
It... What? Vetoed, as well?
Okay, well, we tried."
355
00:13:36,250 --> 00:13:37,718
Now, luckily, as a German,
356
00:13:37,818 --> 00:13:40,988
Merkel wasn't fazed
by the sausage fests.
357
00:13:41,088 --> 00:13:42,489
But even more importantly,
358
00:13:42,589 --> 00:13:44,391
she faced down crisis
after crisis,
359
00:13:44,491 --> 00:13:46,527
and she got Germany
and the whole of Europe
360
00:13:46,627 --> 00:13:48,595
through to the other side.
361
00:13:48,695 --> 00:13:51,265
NEWSWOMAN: Many in Europe saw
Merkel as a steady hand
362
00:13:51,365 --> 00:13:52,766
in times of crisis.
363
00:13:52,866 --> 00:13:55,869
In critical moments,
Angela was that lady,
364
00:13:55,969 --> 00:14:01,341
that madame who intervened and
helped us to find the solution.
365
00:14:01,441 --> 00:14:03,777
NEWSMAN: Angela Merkel,
lauded as a bulwark of Europe,
366
00:14:03,877 --> 00:14:08,182
helping save it from imploding
during the 2009 debt crisis.
367
00:14:08,282 --> 00:14:11,051
Angela Merkel, for 16 years,
has kept their country
368
00:14:11,084 --> 00:14:12,386
-in kind of a bubble.
-Yup.
369
00:14:12,486 --> 00:14:14,955
All those turmoils in the
world was spared to the Germans.
370
00:14:15,055 --> 00:14:16,723
There was no economic slump.
There was nothing.
371
00:14:25,399 --> 00:14:27,634
NEWSMAN 2: Merkel showed
her resolve in 2015
372
00:14:27,734 --> 00:14:30,237
when she allowed
more than a million refugees,
373
00:14:30,337 --> 00:14:33,941
most fleeing from Syria's civil
war, to cross into Germany.
374
00:14:34,074 --> 00:14:36,710
It was later heavily criticized
by those who believed
375
00:14:36,810 --> 00:14:38,512
Germany was overburdened.
376
00:14:38,612 --> 00:14:40,547
Merkel's answer
to her critics was
377
00:14:40,647 --> 00:14:42,950
"Wir schaffen das."
"We can manage."
378
00:14:43,083 --> 00:14:45,786
NEWSMAN 3: Merkel was originally
planning to step down in 2017,
379
00:14:45,886 --> 00:14:49,556
but thought better of it after a
populist was elected president.
380
00:14:49,656 --> 00:14:52,159
NEWSMAN 4: Merkel conferred
with outgoing President Obama
381
00:14:52,259 --> 00:14:54,394
about the decision
to run for another term,
382
00:14:54,494 --> 00:14:57,164
something she now felt compelled
to do because of Trump.
383
00:14:57,264 --> 00:14:59,266
At the end of their
final meeting together,
384
00:14:59,366 --> 00:15:00,901
the president remembered,
385
00:15:01,034 --> 00:15:03,036
"a single tear appearing
in her eyes."
386
00:15:03,136 --> 00:15:06,940
The president later saying,
"Angela-- she's all alone."
387
00:15:07,040 --> 00:15:09,943
Oh, you got to feel bad
for Merkel.
388
00:15:10,043 --> 00:15:12,479
Because Trump won, she felt
389
00:15:12,579 --> 00:15:15,249
she had to stick around
way longer than she wanted.
390
00:15:15,349 --> 00:15:17,918
I mean, no one could understand
what that feels like,
391
00:15:18,051 --> 00:15:19,686
except maybe Melania.
392
00:15:19,786 --> 00:15:21,488
And that just goes to show you
how insane it was
393
00:15:21,588 --> 00:15:23,056
that Trump got elected.
394
00:15:23,090 --> 00:15:24,525
Like, if you get a job,
395
00:15:24,625 --> 00:15:26,326
and someone all the way
in Germany is like,
396
00:15:26,426 --> 00:15:27,861
"Oh, mein Gott.
397
00:15:27,961 --> 00:15:30,531
This certainly changes
my life plans,"
398
00:15:30,631 --> 00:15:32,366
that is saying something
about you.
399
00:15:32,466 --> 00:15:34,902
I mean, what it's saying is
that Trump was terrifying.
400
00:15:35,068 --> 00:15:37,371
And in a way,
he was also very inspirational.
401
00:15:37,471 --> 00:15:39,873
I mean,
he inspired Merkel to run.
402
00:15:39,973 --> 00:15:42,976
He inspired Biden to run.
403
00:15:43,076 --> 00:15:45,112
He inspired Mike Pence to run...
404
00:15:45,212 --> 00:15:47,281
away from Trump supporters
who were trying to hang him.
405
00:15:47,381 --> 00:15:50,951
"Please don't. Mother says
we save that for my birthdays."
406
00:15:51,084 --> 00:15:52,753
But this is why Germany
and the rest of Europe
407
00:15:52,853 --> 00:15:54,087
are a little freaked out
408
00:15:54,188 --> 00:15:55,722
about not having Merkel around
anymore, right?
409
00:15:55,822 --> 00:15:58,091
Whatever the crisis was--
whether it was refugees
410
00:15:58,125 --> 00:16:00,093
or the economy
or a crisis of democracy--
411
00:16:00,194 --> 00:16:03,197
she was the calm
and stabilizing force
412
00:16:03,297 --> 00:16:05,365
that kept everything
from falling apart.
413
00:16:05,465 --> 00:16:08,101
She's like the Cardi B feature
on any rap song.
414
00:16:08,202 --> 00:16:10,237
No matter how bad the beat
or the other rappers,
415
00:16:10,337 --> 00:16:12,739
you know Cardi B's gonna bring
the fire and save that song.
416
00:16:12,840 --> 00:16:15,142
Yeah, like, if Cardi B featured
on the "National Anthem,"
417
00:16:15,242 --> 00:16:16,476
even Colin Kaepernick
would be like,
418
00:16:16,577 --> 00:16:17,845
"All right, I got
to stand for this part."
419
00:16:17,945 --> 00:16:20,848
♪ Wap, wap, wap,
and the home of the brave. ♪
420
00:16:20,948 --> 00:16:24,952
So, Chancellor Merkel,
congratulations on a long career
421
00:16:25,052 --> 00:16:26,954
of being Europe's
designated driver.
422
00:16:27,054 --> 00:16:29,556
You kept things stable,
you stood up for democracy,
423
00:16:29,656 --> 00:16:32,759
and you never once,
never once appeared
424
00:16:32,860 --> 00:16:34,661
on Jeffrey Epstein's
flight logs,
425
00:16:34,761 --> 00:16:37,264
which is really hard
for a world leader to pull off.
426
00:16:37,364 --> 00:16:40,267
So, after 16 years of holding
the global system together,
427
00:16:40,367 --> 00:16:41,869
you deserve to relax.
428
00:16:41,969 --> 00:16:44,271
Take a load off
and go and get a massage.
429
00:16:44,371 --> 00:16:47,241
A massage
you actually want this time.
430
00:16:47,341 --> 00:16:48,642
All right,
when we come back,
431
00:16:48,742 --> 00:16:51,845
we'll look at the power couples
of 2021.
432
00:16:51,945 --> 00:16:53,247
You don't want to miss it.
433
00:16:56,717 --> 00:16:58,018
Welcome back to The Daily Show.
434
00:16:58,118 --> 00:17:00,854
2021 is almost over,
435
00:17:00,954 --> 00:17:03,857
and I think we can all agree
that, compared to last year,
436
00:17:03,957 --> 00:17:06,193
it's been a perfect year.
437
00:17:06,293 --> 00:17:08,228
So for the rest of the month,
we'll be remembering
438
00:17:08,328 --> 00:17:11,031
all of its best moments
in our year-end segment
439
00:17:11,131 --> 00:17:15,969
A Look Back at 2021: The Least
Bad Year of the Last Two Years.
440
00:17:16,069 --> 00:17:19,239
Tonight, Desi Lydic looks back
at the power couples
441
00:17:19,339 --> 00:17:21,174
of 2021.
442
00:17:21,275 --> 00:17:23,010
♪ ♪
443
00:17:28,749 --> 00:17:32,085
If 2020 was the year
of being cooped up alone,
444
00:17:32,185 --> 00:17:36,790
then 2021 was the year
of blossoming romance.
445
00:17:36,890 --> 00:17:38,592
And not just for boring,
average people.
446
00:17:38,692 --> 00:17:41,228
I'm talking about celebrities.
447
00:17:41,328 --> 00:17:43,063
The people I stalk
on the Internet,
448
00:17:43,163 --> 00:17:44,965
and sometimes in real life.
449
00:17:45,065 --> 00:17:47,501
But not all celebrity pairs
are created equal,
450
00:17:47,601 --> 00:17:50,037
so let's count down
the best of the year
451
00:17:50,137 --> 00:17:53,840
in Desi Lydic's
2021 Power Couple Countdown.
452
00:17:53,941 --> 00:17:56,209
♪ ♪
453
00:17:56,310 --> 00:17:58,445
Coming in at number five
454
00:17:58,545 --> 00:18:01,114
is number 2.0.
455
00:18:01,214 --> 00:18:04,618
Specifically Bennifer 2.0.
456
00:18:04,718 --> 00:18:07,187
NEWSMAN: Ben Affleck has
reportedly rekindled his romance
457
00:18:07,287 --> 00:18:09,256
with Jennifer Lopez.
458
00:18:09,356 --> 00:18:11,525
Bennifer 2.0 back in action
459
00:18:11,625 --> 00:18:16,029
17 years after the A-listers
called off their engagement.
460
00:18:16,129 --> 00:18:17,431
NEWSWOMAN: The couple
out of town this weekend
461
00:18:17,531 --> 00:18:19,099
in Saint-Tropez, France,
462
00:18:19,199 --> 00:18:22,903
celebrating Jennifer's
52nd birthday on a yacht.
463
00:18:23,003 --> 00:18:24,404
What the hell?
464
00:18:24,504 --> 00:18:26,373
She's 52?
465
00:18:26,473 --> 00:18:28,342
Years?
466
00:18:28,442 --> 00:18:30,444
I didn't look that young
at 52 months.
467
00:18:30,544 --> 00:18:33,213
What the (bleep) is she eating?
468
00:18:33,313 --> 00:18:36,516
It is so great to see
Ben and Jenn back together.
469
00:18:36,617 --> 00:18:39,753
Ben is now the most important
person in her life.
470
00:18:39,853 --> 00:18:41,855
Aside from that witch
who cast a spell
471
00:18:41,955 --> 00:18:43,690
to keep her young forever.
472
00:18:43,857 --> 00:18:46,260
Goddamn it, J.Lo,
give me her number!
473
00:18:47,261 --> 00:18:49,863
This couple would have been
higher on my list,
474
00:18:49,896 --> 00:18:53,166
but the only problem I have is,
I hate the name Bennifer.
475
00:18:53,267 --> 00:18:56,136
If it were up to me,
I would've gone with Lo-flac
476
00:18:56,236 --> 00:18:58,939
or, even better, Af-pez.
477
00:18:59,039 --> 00:19:01,008
Now, that's sexy.
478
00:19:01,108 --> 00:19:03,610
And, really,
nothing is more exciting
479
00:19:03,710 --> 00:19:07,180
than rekindling a relationship
from 17 years ago.
480
00:19:07,281 --> 00:19:08,882
In fact,
481
00:19:08,982 --> 00:19:11,685
I'm gonna try that, too.
Excuse me.
482
00:19:15,689 --> 00:19:18,258
Yes, hi. Is Matt there?
483
00:19:18,358 --> 00:19:20,160
It's Desi.
484
00:19:20,260 --> 00:19:22,562
He and I dated back in 2004.
485
00:19:22,663 --> 00:19:25,499
It was a pretty spicy summer.
486
00:19:25,599 --> 00:19:27,100
(chuckles)
487
00:19:27,200 --> 00:19:29,503
Oh, he did?
488
00:19:29,603 --> 00:19:32,306
I'm so sorry for your loss.
489
00:19:36,109 --> 00:19:37,377
Well, I guess
490
00:19:37,477 --> 00:19:40,013
I can kiss my Af-pez dreams
goodbye. (chuckles)
491
00:19:40,113 --> 00:19:42,916
Power couple number four:
492
00:19:43,016 --> 00:19:45,919
it's Megan Fox
and Machine Gun Kelly.
493
00:19:46,019 --> 00:19:49,089
They're one
of my favorite couples of 2021
494
00:19:49,189 --> 00:19:52,693
because they like
to make-a the intercourse-a.
495
00:19:52,859 --> 00:19:54,394
If you've been
on social media recently,
496
00:19:54,494 --> 00:19:57,397
you've probably noticed that
Megan Fox and Machine Gun Kelly
497
00:19:57,497 --> 00:19:59,800
can't keep their hands
off of each other.
498
00:19:59,833 --> 00:20:03,303
NEWSMAN: MGK says their romance
is both ecstasy and agony.
499
00:20:03,403 --> 00:20:04,938
Megan says on her Instagram,
though,
500
00:20:05,038 --> 00:20:07,274
that their sex life
is so explosive,
501
00:20:07,374 --> 00:20:11,211
it would basically make
the devil blush.
502
00:20:11,311 --> 00:20:14,181
Damn! These two are so hot,
503
00:20:14,281 --> 00:20:17,251
they had an entire meeting
about them at COP26.
504
00:20:17,351 --> 00:20:21,421
Got to love how these two
just put it out there in 2021.
505
00:20:21,521 --> 00:20:23,090
The masks came off.
506
00:20:23,190 --> 00:20:24,992
The tongues came out.
507
00:20:25,092 --> 00:20:28,095
Then the masks came back on
again because of Delta,
508
00:20:28,195 --> 00:20:31,198
but the tongue stayed out,
so the mask got all wet.
509
00:20:31,298 --> 00:20:33,100
It was gross.
510
00:20:33,200 --> 00:20:36,837
2021's number three
most powerful couple
511
00:20:36,870 --> 00:20:39,206
isn't a couple but a throuple.
512
00:20:39,306 --> 00:20:43,043
That's right, I'm talking
Prince Harry, Meghan Markle
513
00:20:43,143 --> 00:20:45,345
and Oprah.
514
00:20:45,445 --> 00:20:46,713
Prince Harry and Meghan Markle's
515
00:20:46,847 --> 00:20:48,749
historic
and groundbreaking interview
516
00:20:48,849 --> 00:20:50,751
with the one,
the only Oprah Winfrey.
517
00:20:50,851 --> 00:20:53,654
To call it revealing
would be an understatement.
518
00:20:53,754 --> 00:20:56,456
The couple lobbed shock
after shock.
519
00:20:56,556 --> 00:20:57,791
And it seemed just when
you thought it couldn't get
520
00:20:57,891 --> 00:20:59,493
any more shocking, it did.
521
00:20:59,593 --> 00:21:00,928
Were you silent
522
00:21:01,028 --> 00:21:03,130
or were you silenced?
523
00:21:04,564 --> 00:21:05,532
The latter.
524
00:21:05,632 --> 00:21:06,967
NEWSWOMAN:
Meghan telling Oprah
525
00:21:07,067 --> 00:21:10,904
there was concern
over Baby Archie's skin color.
526
00:21:11,004 --> 00:21:13,807
Concerns and conversations
about how dark his skin might be
527
00:21:13,907 --> 00:21:15,142
when he's born.
528
00:21:18,011 --> 00:21:19,246
What?
529
00:21:20,380 --> 00:21:21,949
What?
530
00:21:22,049 --> 00:21:24,818
This was
the most intense conversation
531
00:21:24,885 --> 00:21:27,421
I have ever seen happen
on patio furniture.
532
00:21:27,521 --> 00:21:30,390
And my parents told me they were
getting a divorce in a hammock.
533
00:21:30,490 --> 00:21:32,259
And although this relationship
534
00:21:32,359 --> 00:21:34,962
only lasted as long
as the interview itself,
535
00:21:35,062 --> 00:21:39,099
the world will always have
the memes to remember it by.
536
00:21:39,199 --> 00:21:43,737
I, however, have something else
to remember it by.
537
00:21:43,837 --> 00:21:46,640
I snuck on the set and stole
the table plant. (chuckles)
538
00:21:46,740 --> 00:21:48,508
(sniffs)
Ow.
539
00:21:48,609 --> 00:21:50,243
At number two,
540
00:21:50,344 --> 00:21:52,412
we've got a couple so powerful,
541
00:21:52,512 --> 00:21:54,681
they don't even need
to be together.
542
00:21:54,848 --> 00:21:56,683
Joe Manchin and Kyrsten Sinema.
543
00:21:56,783 --> 00:21:59,553
Because sometimes love
is deeply passionate,
544
00:21:59,653 --> 00:22:02,789
but, other times,
it's unapologetically moderate.
545
00:22:02,823 --> 00:22:03,924
NEWSWOMAN:
All eyes are watching
546
00:22:04,024 --> 00:22:06,793
the two hold-out
Democratic senators,
547
00:22:06,860 --> 00:22:10,430
Joe Manchin of West Virginia
and Kyrsten Sinema of Arizona.
548
00:22:10,530 --> 00:22:12,299
Sinema and Manchin,
obviously, in the Senate,
549
00:22:12,399 --> 00:22:13,967
they hold the keys
in the 50-50 Senate.
550
00:22:14,067 --> 00:22:15,702
NEWSMAN:
Manchin opposes spending.
551
00:22:15,802 --> 00:22:17,804
Sinema opposes taxes.
552
00:22:17,871 --> 00:22:19,806
They make a lovely couple.
553
00:22:19,840 --> 00:22:21,808
In fact, they're the number one
power couple
554
00:22:21,908 --> 00:22:23,810
in Washington, D.C., today.
555
00:22:23,877 --> 00:22:26,213
That's right.
Everyone was talking
556
00:22:26,313 --> 00:22:28,282
about
these two Senate sweethearts
557
00:22:28,382 --> 00:22:31,318
because they love grinding...
558
00:22:31,418 --> 00:22:33,453
everything to a halt.
559
00:22:33,553 --> 00:22:36,890
And these two really proved
that opposites attract.
560
00:22:36,990 --> 00:22:39,159
He's an old West Virginia man.
561
00:22:39,259 --> 00:22:42,229
She's a business Katy Perry
from Arizona.
562
00:22:42,329 --> 00:22:44,865
He's from blue-collar
coal country.
563
00:22:44,965 --> 00:22:49,002
She wore a blue collar on
that denim vest for some reason.
564
00:22:49,102 --> 00:22:51,738
But they came together
over their shared love
565
00:22:51,838 --> 00:22:53,373
of tantric legislating.
566
00:22:53,473 --> 00:22:57,110
No matter how much you beg
for clean energy subsidies,
567
00:22:57,210 --> 00:22:59,880
a wealth tax,
or paid family leave,
568
00:22:59,980 --> 00:23:03,050
these "build back" blockers
can make negotiations last
569
00:23:03,150 --> 00:23:04,985
all... year...
570
00:23:05,085 --> 00:23:08,188
long. Mmm.
571
00:23:08,288 --> 00:23:11,858
So thanks to these two,
Americans don't have paid leave.
572
00:23:11,959 --> 00:23:13,894
But I'll tell you what.
573
00:23:13,994 --> 00:23:16,496
You can't pay me any amount
of money
574
00:23:16,597 --> 00:23:19,600
to leave this studio. (laughs)
575
00:23:19,700 --> 00:23:23,003
They have me chained to the set.
576
00:23:23,103 --> 00:23:27,240
And finally, coming to you
from halfway around the globe,
577
00:23:27,341 --> 00:23:31,912
my number one
power couple of 2021:
578
00:23:32,012 --> 00:23:33,313
the Suez Canal
579
00:23:33,413 --> 00:23:36,483
and that huge container ship
that got stuck in it.
580
00:23:36,583 --> 00:23:40,721
Everyone in the world was
wanting these two to break up.
581
00:23:40,821 --> 00:23:44,057
And guess what?
That only made it hotter.
582
00:23:44,157 --> 00:23:48,195
For six and a half days,
they just kept at it.
583
00:23:48,295 --> 00:23:52,132
PDA alert-- turns out
they like when people watch.
584
00:23:52,232 --> 00:23:54,835
Now, let's take a closer look
at these two love birds.
585
00:23:54,901 --> 00:23:57,638
And just a warning-- you should
take the kids out of the room
586
00:23:57,771 --> 00:24:00,307
because this might
get a little graphic.
587
00:24:00,407 --> 00:24:06,580
Ooh! These two really
put the "anal" in "c-anal."
588
00:24:06,680 --> 00:24:09,650
That's a sexy way
you pronounce "canal."
589
00:24:09,783 --> 00:24:12,786
Sadly, they have been separated
for a few months now,
590
00:24:12,853 --> 00:24:14,588
but it leaves
the world asking,
591
00:24:14,688 --> 00:24:18,125
is there still unfinished
business between these two?
592
00:24:18,225 --> 00:24:21,495
Who could possibly
fill that canal's void?
593
00:24:21,595 --> 00:24:24,531
Ah, it's Pete Davidson,
of course.
594
00:24:24,631 --> 00:24:27,367
He really does have
that big ship energy.
595
00:24:27,467 --> 00:24:30,037
Mmm.
596
00:24:30,137 --> 00:24:31,638
Well, thanks for joining me.
597
00:24:31,805 --> 00:24:35,909
That's it for "Desi Lydic's
2021 Power Couple Countdown."
598
00:24:36,009 --> 00:24:37,244
Now, if you'll excuse me,
599
00:24:37,344 --> 00:24:39,713
I'm gonna go make a deal
with that witch.
600
00:24:39,813 --> 00:24:42,482
Who needs a soul when you can
have abs like that at 52?
601
00:24:42,583 --> 00:24:44,284
Holy shit.
602
00:24:44,384 --> 00:24:46,887
Goddamn it. Guys.
603
00:24:46,987 --> 00:24:48,822
Oh! Oh, come on!
604
00:24:48,889 --> 00:24:51,458
♪ ♪
605
00:24:51,558 --> 00:24:53,894
Thank you so much, Desi.
All right, when we come back,
606
00:24:53,994 --> 00:24:56,964
the star of the hit show Love
Life, William Jackson Harper,
607
00:24:57,064 --> 00:24:59,900
will be joining me right here in
the studio, so don't go away.
608
00:25:01,806 --> 00:25:03,107
Welcome back to The Daily Show.
My guest tonight
609
00:25:03,207 --> 00:25:05,609
is Emmy-nominated actor
William Jackson Harper.
610
00:25:05,709 --> 00:25:08,112
He's here to talk about starring
in the second season
611
00:25:08,212 --> 00:25:12,349
of the HBO Max anthology series
Love Life.
612
00:25:12,450 --> 00:25:14,118
I-I got to go to sleep.
613
00:25:14,218 --> 00:25:16,120
-Good night.
-Good night.
614
00:25:19,056 --> 00:25:20,724
Unless you want to have sex.
615
00:25:20,825 --> 00:25:22,593
Oh.
616
00:25:23,561 --> 00:25:25,396
Yeah. Yeah.
617
00:25:35,239 --> 00:25:36,674
I'm really tired.
618
00:25:36,774 --> 00:25:38,476
(both laugh)
619
00:25:38,576 --> 00:25:40,811
It's okay. As soon
as I decided, I was like...
620
00:25:40,911 --> 00:25:44,248
Um, but, uh,
but tomorrow, though.
621
00:25:44,348 --> 00:25:45,616
#Smooth.
622
00:25:45,716 --> 00:25:47,017
(laughter)
623
00:25:47,118 --> 00:25:49,019
-Yeah, man, that's me.
-What's going on, William?
624
00:25:49,120 --> 00:25:50,821
-Welcome to the show.
-Oh, thanks for having me.
625
00:25:50,921 --> 00:25:52,289
Thank you very much
for being here, man.
626
00:25:52,389 --> 00:25:54,558
Congratulations, first of all,
on getting that Emmy nomination.
627
00:25:54,658 --> 00:25:56,393
-I mean, you know...
-Yeah. Yeah.
628
00:25:56,494 --> 00:26:00,064
That was a wild ride for you,
because, if the story is true,
629
00:26:00,164 --> 00:26:01,298
you were about to quit acting
630
00:26:01,398 --> 00:26:03,167
before all of this happened
to you, right?
631
00:26:03,267 --> 00:26:04,735
I was kind of on the brink,
yeah, yeah.
632
00:26:04,835 --> 00:26:06,637
You know, the industry had me
on the ropes.
633
00:26:06,737 --> 00:26:08,172
-Right.
-I was, uh, you know,
634
00:26:08,272 --> 00:26:09,640
catching a lot of left hooks.
635
00:26:09,707 --> 00:26:12,243
But yeah, it was, uh,
yeah, Good Place came along
636
00:26:12,343 --> 00:26:14,779
at exactly the right time
and just sort of, like,
637
00:26:14,879 --> 00:26:16,981
-rescued me, you know? -And
you just went from one thing
638
00:26:17,081 --> 00:26:19,483
-Yeah. -to the next thing to...
Do you still have that thing
639
00:26:19,650 --> 00:26:21,152
where you go,
"It might go away,"
640
00:26:21,252 --> 00:26:23,053
or have you settled
into the world of like,
641
00:26:23,154 --> 00:26:24,922
"Okay, I think I'm safe
right now"?
642
00:26:25,022 --> 00:26:26,657
Oh, no, no, no.
I'm not settled at all.
643
00:26:26,724 --> 00:26:28,859
Like, I'm afraid at all times.
644
00:26:28,959 --> 00:26:31,262
-Yeah, no, I always think it's
gonna go away, you know? -Right.
645
00:26:31,362 --> 00:26:34,398
Um, just because it's, uh,
just the nature of the business.
646
00:26:34,498 --> 00:26:35,766
-You know? It's just...
-I feel you. Yeah.
647
00:26:35,866 --> 00:26:37,201
-Yeah.
-It's always sort of...
648
00:26:37,301 --> 00:26:39,537
-You know, it's moment
to moment, so yeah. -Yeah.
649
00:26:39,670 --> 00:26:41,005
Well, you're doing well
moment to moment, man.
650
00:26:41,105 --> 00:26:42,573
You know, like,
people loved you in Good Place.
651
00:26:42,673 --> 00:26:44,442
And then, obviously,
Love Life has come along.
652
00:26:44,542 --> 00:26:45,776
And what's-what's cool
about the story...
653
00:26:45,876 --> 00:26:47,278
We had Anna Kendrick on
to talk about it.
654
00:26:47,378 --> 00:26:49,380
-Yeah. -It's, like,
it's really rare to see a show
655
00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:52,049
where you meet a character,
you know the character,
656
00:26:52,149 --> 00:26:53,317
and they're the lead.
657
00:26:53,417 --> 00:26:54,952
And you have these people
around them in the show.
658
00:26:55,052 --> 00:26:56,320
And the second season
comes along,
659
00:26:56,420 --> 00:26:58,055
and you think the show's
gonna go in one direction,
660
00:26:58,155 --> 00:26:59,457
-and all of a sudden it flips.
-Right.
661
00:26:59,557 --> 00:27:00,758
NOAH: Then we start following
your character,
662
00:27:00,858 --> 00:27:02,426
who lives, in my opinion,
663
00:27:02,526 --> 00:27:04,762
-one of the messiest love lives
I've ever seen. -(laughs)
664
00:27:04,862 --> 00:27:08,866
Yeah. Yeah, Marcus is a hot mess
in all the ways.
665
00:27:08,966 --> 00:27:10,301
But, I mean, I-I...
666
00:27:10,401 --> 00:27:12,703
You know,
it-it feels really human to me.
667
00:27:12,803 --> 00:27:15,639
I feel like, you know,
there's something about, uh...
668
00:27:15,740 --> 00:27:17,508
you know, the genre of rom-com
669
00:27:17,641 --> 00:27:19,310
where, you know, like,
you know, your central character
670
00:27:19,410 --> 00:27:20,644
is always so sympathetic
671
00:27:20,745 --> 00:27:22,079
and everything
is happening to them.
672
00:27:22,179 --> 00:27:23,781
But I feel like in life,
673
00:27:23,881 --> 00:27:25,549
you know, when you're going
through something like that,
674
00:27:25,649 --> 00:27:29,920
you are partly responsible
if not mostly responsible
675
00:27:30,020 --> 00:27:32,990
for a lot of the-the drama
that's coming your way.
676
00:27:33,090 --> 00:27:35,526
And, so, you know,
I-I wanted to sort of...
677
00:27:35,659 --> 00:27:36,827
You know, especially as we were
678
00:27:36,927 --> 00:27:38,329
sort of, like,
crafting the story
679
00:27:38,429 --> 00:27:39,730
and sort of figuring,
you know, everything out,
680
00:27:39,830 --> 00:27:42,166
I just wanted to, like,
really lean into that
681
00:27:42,266 --> 00:27:44,568
and not have it be something
where it's like,
682
00:27:44,668 --> 00:27:46,437
"Oh, we just feel bad
for the guy."
683
00:27:46,537 --> 00:27:48,139
It's like, "Oh, I'm...
684
00:27:48,239 --> 00:27:50,174
-I'm not sure I like this dude."
-That's interesting.
685
00:27:50,274 --> 00:27:51,675
But he feels...
You know, but he feels real.
686
00:27:51,776 --> 00:27:53,077
Well, let's talk a little bit
about that, then.
687
00:27:53,177 --> 00:27:54,678
Like, the crafting of the story.
Because you're not...
688
00:27:54,745 --> 00:27:56,414
You're not just, you know,
the lead actor in this.
689
00:27:56,514 --> 00:27:57,948
-You're also producing, correct?
-Yeah.
690
00:27:58,048 --> 00:28:00,484
So you-- so you're part of
the journey in terms of, like,
691
00:28:00,618 --> 00:28:02,520
figuring out where the show's
gonna go and how it's gonna go.
692
00:28:02,620 --> 00:28:05,656
-Right. -What I-- What I
really loved watching it is
693
00:28:05,756 --> 00:28:08,626
it-it's not often
that you will watch a-a show
694
00:28:08,692 --> 00:28:11,028
where you will have
a Black character
695
00:28:11,128 --> 00:28:13,097
or Black love onscreen
696
00:28:13,197 --> 00:28:16,033
that isn't, like, you know,
just chaotic and hectic.
697
00:28:16,133 --> 00:28:17,635
-Right. -You know, there are
moments where, you know,
698
00:28:17,668 --> 00:28:19,637
w-we're watching your character
go from being divorced
699
00:28:19,737 --> 00:28:22,006
to this new world
of trying to find love again
700
00:28:22,106 --> 00:28:23,974
-and being in this space.
But there was just... -Mm-hmm.
701
00:28:24,075 --> 00:28:25,910
There were really cool, calm
moments where you're just like,
702
00:28:26,010 --> 00:28:28,446
"Oh, yeah, this is what
most relationships are,"
703
00:28:28,546 --> 00:28:30,414
-and that is just the nothing...
-Yeah.
704
00:28:30,514 --> 00:28:32,650
-...between the valleys
and the peaks. -Yeah. Yeah.
705
00:28:32,716 --> 00:28:34,418
-And that's what makes it
really interesting. -Yeah.
706
00:28:34,518 --> 00:28:37,421
And... (stammers)
that's also very adult.
707
00:28:37,521 --> 00:28:40,091
Also that-- You know...
708
00:28:40,191 --> 00:28:42,493
that sort of rut
that you can hit... (chuckles)
709
00:28:42,660 --> 00:28:43,828
which is sort of like,
you know--
710
00:28:43,928 --> 00:28:45,496
sort of heralds
the end of something
711
00:28:45,663 --> 00:28:47,298
-or the beginning of something
else. -Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
712
00:28:47,398 --> 00:28:49,567
Um, and how...
713
00:28:49,667 --> 00:28:51,836
how ill at ease we can become
in those moments,
714
00:28:51,936 --> 00:28:52,970
you know, where it's just like,
715
00:28:53,070 --> 00:28:55,172
"Oh, like,
the excitement is gone.
716
00:28:55,272 --> 00:28:56,907
"Aah, is that okay?
717
00:28:57,007 --> 00:28:59,210
"Am I supposed to be doing
something different?
718
00:28:59,310 --> 00:29:03,280
Am I entitled to feel, uh,
dissatisfied with this moment?"
719
00:29:03,380 --> 00:29:05,616
You know? And I-I think
that Marcus is sort of, like,
720
00:29:05,649 --> 00:29:08,085
going through all of that
and questioning all of that,
721
00:29:08,185 --> 00:29:11,255
-as-as much as he's questioning
his own identity. -Right.
722
00:29:11,355 --> 00:29:13,624
You know? Uh, 'cause, you know,
when you leave a marriage,
723
00:29:13,691 --> 00:29:15,059
when you leave
a long relationship like that,
724
00:29:15,159 --> 00:29:17,428
a piece of you leaves as well.
725
00:29:17,528 --> 00:29:19,296
-Oh, man.
-And so, you know,
726
00:29:19,396 --> 00:29:21,632
he's, like,
putting this all back together
727
00:29:21,665 --> 00:29:24,001
as he's-- as he's dating people,
728
00:29:24,101 --> 00:29:25,503
-which is not...
-(laughs)
729
00:29:25,636 --> 00:29:27,438
...not-not-a recipe for success.
730
00:29:27,538 --> 00:29:29,240
When you look at the journey
that you've been on,
731
00:29:29,340 --> 00:29:30,374
you're at the beginning, man.
732
00:29:30,474 --> 00:29:31,675
You know,
this journey will hopefully
733
00:29:31,776 --> 00:29:33,077
be long and successful.
734
00:29:33,177 --> 00:29:35,179
What do you hope to achieve
as, like, a thespian?
735
00:29:35,279 --> 00:29:36,914
'Cause you aren't just,
like, an actor.
736
00:29:37,014 --> 00:29:38,449
You're one of those people
I go like,
737
00:29:38,549 --> 00:29:41,352
"Wow. This person has acted."
You know, you're a thespian.
738
00:29:41,452 --> 00:29:43,187
-You know, your spine got all
straight? -Oh, you have to.
739
00:29:43,287 --> 00:29:44,488
-Yeah, you're doing it.
-You know what I mean?
740
00:29:44,655 --> 00:29:47,091
Yeah. Um, you know, man,
I-I really...
741
00:29:47,191 --> 00:29:49,160
I'm just chasing
interesting parts and things
742
00:29:49,260 --> 00:29:50,828
that are going
to be tough to do.
743
00:29:50,928 --> 00:29:53,130
You know, I think the thing
about Love Life was
744
00:29:53,230 --> 00:29:57,268
I... I wasn't sure that I was
up to tackling this job.
745
00:29:57,368 --> 00:30:00,137
-Really? -You know, like
it was something that I'm like,
746
00:30:00,237 --> 00:30:03,808
"I-I've never been, like,
the center of something
747
00:30:03,908 --> 00:30:07,411
on camera like that."
And so, um, I...
748
00:30:07,511 --> 00:30:09,914
That was frightening,
and in a way, it felt...
749
00:30:10,014 --> 00:30:12,416
I felt like a young man again,
you know. Like, I felt like,
750
00:30:12,516 --> 00:30:14,852
"Oh, wow. Like,
I'm a little out of my depth."
751
00:30:14,952 --> 00:30:16,887
I'm open to...
I'm open to anything, you know?
752
00:30:16,987 --> 00:30:21,625
Anything that is going to
scare me to do, I want to do it.
753
00:30:21,659 --> 00:30:23,828
I love that. That's your motto
for your career.
754
00:30:23,928 --> 00:30:26,063
-That's my motto for sex.
-(laughs)
755
00:30:26,163 --> 00:30:28,065
-I appreciate that, man.
-Yeah. Oh, yeah.
756
00:30:28,165 --> 00:30:29,934
My dude, thank you so much
for joining me on the show.
757
00:30:30,034 --> 00:30:31,335
-Thanks for having me.
-Congratulations
758
00:30:31,435 --> 00:30:32,736
on an amazing season, man.
I hope to see you more.
759
00:30:32,837 --> 00:30:34,371
-Thanks, man.
-All right, Love Life
760
00:30:34,472 --> 00:30:35,773
season two, is streaming
right now on HBO Max.
761
00:30:35,873 --> 00:30:37,775
We're gonna take a quick break,
762
00:30:37,875 --> 00:30:39,343
but we'll be right back
after this.
763
00:30:39,443 --> 00:30:40,678
-Thank you, man.
-Oh, thanks, man.
764
00:30:40,778 --> 00:30:42,046
Yeah, man, it's a lot of fun,
for real.
765
00:30:42,146 --> 00:30:43,681
Yeah, I appreciate it,
appreciate it.
766
00:30:45,849 --> 00:30:47,117
Well, that's our show
for tonight, but before we go,
767
00:30:47,217 --> 00:30:49,153
please consider supporting
"Choose Love."
768
00:30:49,253 --> 00:30:51,655
They work to provide refugees
and displaced people
769
00:30:51,755 --> 00:30:54,391
with everything from lifesaving
search-and-rescue boats
770
00:30:54,491 --> 00:30:56,694
to food and even legal advice.
771
00:30:56,794 --> 00:31:00,064
At the link below, you can go
to the Choose Love store
772
00:31:00,164 --> 00:31:02,933
and buy essential
emergency items and services
773
00:31:03,033 --> 00:31:06,103
for the refugees who need them--
everything, diapers, hot meals,
774
00:31:06,203 --> 00:31:08,806
medical services
and so much more.
775
00:31:08,906 --> 00:31:10,207
So, if you'd like
to support Choose Love,
776
00:31:10,307 --> 00:31:12,543
then please check out
the link below.
777
00:31:12,643 --> 00:31:15,679
Also, if you're in San Diego
or Los Angeles this weekend,
778
00:31:15,779 --> 00:31:18,582
my Back to Abnormal comedy tour
is going to be in your city.
779
00:31:18,682 --> 00:31:20,985
Head to backtoabnormaltour.com
to get your tickets.
780
00:31:21,085 --> 00:31:23,420
Until next time, stay safe
out there, get your vaccine.
781
00:31:23,520 --> 00:31:28,225
And remember, if you love anime,
you might have Omicron.
782
00:31:28,325 --> 00:31:32,262
Oh, no! It's coming for me
again! Aah!
783
00:31:32,363 --> 00:31:34,865
Now, here it is--
Your Moment of Zen!
784
00:31:34,965 --> 00:31:37,601
(man speaking German)
785
00:31:40,537 --> 00:31:42,506
"Stayin Alive"
from the Bee Gees.
786
00:31:42,606 --> 00:31:44,274
(speaking German)
787
00:31:44,375 --> 00:31:49,613
♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah, stayin' alive,
stayin' alive. ♪