So, how many of you accidentally
or purposefully eat the sticker on the fruit?
Does anybody do that?
'Cause this was a big thing online.
People were arguing about whether or not
you can eat the sticker that they put on the fruit.
And, like, a lot of people are like,
"Yeah, you're supposed to eat it. It's edible."
And then other people are like,
"You should not be eating stickers on the fruit."
It was, like, a whole fight. It was a whole fight.
My thing was... Really, there were two things.
Number one, who are you that you do not have time
to, like, take a sticker off of your fruit?
What is happening in your life that you're just like,
"Oh, there's a sticker. I don't have time."
(imitates munching) "I have to save lives."
Like, who are you? Take the time,
look at the thing and peel it. Do you know what I'm saying?
It's like... But then at the same time,
there's also the people who are like,
"You can't eat a sticker.
It is the worst thing that'll happen."
It's not the worst thing. They're biodegradable.
It's not good, but it's not the worst thing.
People gonna act like hot dogs don't exist.
You know what I... If you eat hot dogs,
I mean, you're the kind of person
who, like, looks at life and just goes like,
"Yeah, man, (bleep) around. Let's find out."
That's what a hot dog is.
Do you know what I'm say... You're just the kind of person
who's just like, "Yeah."
And it's, like, a good combination
of, like, threat and, like, you know, security.
'Cause the bread is, like... We understand what bread is.
And then the hot dog, you're like, "Uh, let's see.
"Let's see what's going on, baby.
I'm all about that life."
But, I mean, I don't know if you should eat the sticker,
you know what I'm saying?
I didn't know you could eat the sticker
until this argument, by the way.
Till I saw this. Then the New York Times
did a piece on this.
And then the FDA has stepped in.
I was like, "Wow. Of all the things
the New York Times could be doing."
Yeah.
It's weird to be, like, in a newsroom,
and there's just people like that, you know?
"What are you looking at?"
"I'm looking at what's happening
at the Russian border with Ukraine."
"What are you looking into?"
"I'm investigating these new vaccines."
"And you?"
"You guys notice the sticker on fruit?
"You think we should eat it or not eat it?
"I'm gonna do a... I'm gonna do a 300...
300-word article on this, guys. We're all journalists here."
(chuckles)
Countdown to that person writing a hit piece on me.
Well-played, New York Times journalist.
"Why Trevor Noah is worse than the stickers on fruit."
Well-played.
ANNOUNCER: Coming to you from the heart of Times Square
in New York City, the only city in America,
it's The Daily Show.
Tonight, anime can get you in trouble,
marching bands are racist,
and Dwyane Wade.
This is The Daily Show with Trevor Noah.
Hey, what's going on, everybody?
Welcome to The Daily Show. I'm Trevor Noah.
And joining me for today's headlines
is our very own Desi Lydic.
-What's going on, Desi? -Hey, Trevor.
-How you doing? Yeah? -I'm good. I'm good.
I'm just, you know, prepping for Thanksgiving,
Getting ready.
I'm not hosting this year, which is a huge relief,
but I am in charge of the dressing,
which is kind of a huge responsibility.
Dressing all of my uncles?
(exhales)
Finding clothes for all 16 of them?
That's... That's a lot.
I think the dressing has...
You know what, Desi? Good for you.
By the way, do you know where I can find a bunch of camo hats?
No.
No, I don't.
Sorry, I took an edible before I got here.
I didn't know I was gonna be on today.
Well, that's fine, Desi.
Just relax and breathe, and we'll be... we'll be good.
-Okay. -Yeah.
-You okay? -Happy Thanksgiving.
Happy Thanksgiving, Desi.
You good?
Hmm?
Okay. We'll-we'll come back.
-You shout if you need anything. -Okay.
All right, let's jump right into today's headlines.
♪ ♪
We kick things off
with today's big basketball story.
And, no, I'm not talking
about everyone dunking on the Eternals.
I'm talking about an iconic stadium
that's taking on a brand-new identity.
After 22 years, Staples Center in Downtown Los Angeles
is getting a new name,
and it's a real sign of the times.
Beginning Christmas day,
the home of the Lakers, Clippers and Kings
will be known as Crypto.com Arena.
The cryptocurrency trading platform reportedly paid
more than $700 million for the naming rights.
NEWSMAN: The Lakers won six championships in this building.
The Sparks won three titles.
The Clippers play here, too.
You know, it'll be weird. This is, uh...
You know, I grew up this being Staples
and Staples being, you know, the place to play
and the place to be.
It's kind of, like, just stripping the history here.
Well, I mean,
I don't know if you need to get that sentimental, Paul.
You know, it's not like Staples
is a sacred name from the ancestors.
It's a store where you buy 50 packs of binders
even though you only need one.
You know? Then when you get home,
you find out they were the wrong size anyway.
You don't need to get that nostalgic about it.
Like, it's a company.
And if you do want to get nostalgic, just wait.
Just wait. I promise you, soon,
we'll all get used to Crypto.com Arena,
and in 20 years when they change that name
to Nanobot X Arena or whatever,
your kids will be upset about that.
"Back in my day, this stadium wasn't about the latest fad.
"It was about swapping blockchain currencies
"on a digital market exchange.
"There was culture attached to it.
"You know?
NFTs."
And, look, this shouldn't come as a surprise,
but anywhere a team can advertise,
they're gonna advertise. Right?
The stadiums, the jerseys, the court.
They literally started showing commercials during free throws.
You realize that?
We're two months away from the NBA selling name rights
to the score. It's gonna be like...
"And the game ends with a score of 84 to Mountain Dew.
"A big win for the Lakers.
Or a big loss. I can't tell what's happening."
But, I mean, can you blame the arena though?
If people are offering you a shitload of money
to use their name, you do it!
I mean, that's what I did.
I sold my naming rights to a guy named Trevor Noah for 40 bucks.
What, you didn't know this?
Come on. Do I look like a Trevor?
My real name is Bert Pakowski.
(Lydic chuckles)
I'm sorry, I just can't stop picturing them
removing the Staples logo
with one of those giant staple removers.
(laughing)
Just a giant claw.
Sorry, it-- The edible's kicking in, I think. (chuckles)
I need to know what edibles these are.
All right, let's move on from sports to music
and the woman that everyone is talking about right now,
Taylor Swift,
pop star, songwriter
and inventor of the color red.
Personally, I love Taylor Swift.
Huge fan. Really nothing bad to say about her.
But even if I had something bad to say about her, I wouldn't.
I wouldn't say it.
Because Taylor Swift's fans are super protective of her.
Like-like, they're like one of those old-fashioned dads
with a shotgun who doesn't want you to marry his daughter,
'cause he wants to marry her.
You see, Taylor Swift has been rerecording
all of her old albums,
which means people are relistening
to all of her old songs about her famous exes
and then getting mad at those exes all over again
on her behalf.
And while Taylor may be content to address her old boyfriends
with heartfelt lyrics and songs that are--
again, I want to stress this-- perfect in every way,
some of her fans are a lot less subtle.
This is going a little too far.
While Jake Gyllenhaal is taking incoming fire from the Swifties,
another one of Taylor's exes
is being bombarded with messages now.
NEWSMAN: A user on Instagram sent John Mayer
a direct message, telling him...
Mayer then responded to the user,
saying that he'd been getting many messages like that
over the past couple of days and asking,
"Do you really hope I die?"
To which the user responded, "OMG. What?
I don't want you to die. I'm sorry."
The user apologized again and admitted
they didn't really think Mayer would see the message.
You see, people, this is what I hate about social media--
it makes people act shittier than they actually are,
which then makes us think
that people are shittier than they actually are.
Because social media makes us forget
that we're all human beings.
You know, we just see that little avatar
and then we all talk shit to each other, but we're all human.
Even celebrities are real people. All of them!
I mean, obviously except Timothée Chalamet.
He's got to be CGI. No one can be that good-looking.
I mean, just look at that person.
Now I'm craving spice. Goddamn.
Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm.
And I know her fans are like...
"But he hurt her. Listen to her song."
Yes. That's all you're supposed to do-- listen to the song.
You know, Taylor Swift writes songs to express her emotions
in a way that touches other people,
not to order a hit on her ex-boyfriends.
So death threats are not the way to go,
especially with someone like John Mayer.
Don't-don't send him death threats.
He gets them all the time.
If you really want to upset him,
tell him that Ed Sheeran is a better guitar player.
-That's gonna hit his heart. -(chuckles)
You know, it's-it's weird how people get--
like, they're so hateful on the Internet, Desi.
Yeah. I know. It's bad.
But if you think John Mayer's DMs are rough,
you should see the DMs of any woman on the Internet.
-Really? -Yeah.
It's either death threats
or requests to see your feet.
-Every time. -Like-like, just your feet feet?
Yeah. Just your feet.
-Or a death threat. -Huh.
One of the two.
-Wow. -It's either, like, "Why are women in Star Wars?"
Or "Send me a picture of your feet."
-That's really intense. -Yeah.
-Yeah. -I know they're both bad, but which one do you prefer?
(sputters)
Well, I'm pretty proud of my feet,
so...
I got no problem sending foot pics.
A-Again, bad. I just wondered which one.
Have you ever requested a foot pic?
No. No.
Wow, look who's a gentleman.
I think "normal" is the phrase you were looking for, maybe.
Well, okay. It all depends.
-Yeah. -No, but, to be totally fair,
it is completely inappropriate
for anyone to send a death threat on the Internet.
-Okay. -It's-it's not cool.
-I agree. -You got to do it the old-school way.
You know, you got to, like, cut out from the magazine.
This is the real way to do it.
That is better than a DM?
-Yeah. -Still not good.
Yeah.
I always have this with me, just in case.
I don't even know who it's for,
but it takes so long to do it that I figure,
by the time I'm done, I'll figure it out.
I'll be pissed at somebody.
By the way, you're out of glue.
Yeah, and all my magazines have been destroyed.
-Thank you, Desi. -Yeah. No.
-This is from your book cover. -Oh. Well, thank you.
I thought you wanted it signed because you wanted to read it.
You wrote that book?
Yeah, I-I did. I-I wrote it.
All right, let's-let's move on to the big story
from Washington today.
Last week, Arizona congressman Paul Gosar
tweeted an anime video of him chopping off AOC's head, right?
Easily the most disturbing cartoon
since that Family Guy fan fic porn
I accidentally watched seven times.
Brian has stamina.
And Democrats were so furious about this video,
that today, they voted to censure Gosar
and kick him off of his committees,
the first member of Congress to be censured in over a decade.
Yeah, it's pretty bad.
But Gosar-- well, he seemed to take it as a badge of honor.
I rise today to address and reject the mischaracterization,
accusations from many in this body
that the cartoon from my office is dangerous or threatening.
If I must join Alexander Hamilton,
the first person attempted to be censured by this House,
so be it. It is done.
Uh, yeah, I... I don't know
if this makes you the same as Alexander Hamilton.
You know, this is like... this is like
Jeffrey Epstein's girlfriend taking the stand like,
"If I must be tried in court
just as Jesus was, then so be it."
"No, no, lady, lady, it's the same process,
but these are very different crimes."
Now the fact is that this didn't surprise anybody, right?
Seeing something like this from Paul Gosar is not surprising,
because over the years, Gosar has made a name for himself
as possibly the most controversial person
in all of Congress.
Which is actually pretty impressive,
when you think about it.
So, let's talk about what makes Gosar
one of Congress's most extreme extremists
in another installment of Fringe-Watching.
♪ ♪
Paul Gosar was first elected to Congress back in 2010,
riding the wave of the Tea Party,
the movement that pretended to care about the national debt,
but only while Obama was in office.
(whispering): He's Black.
And like many Tea Partyers who were elected that year,
he didn't come from a career in politics.
No, he was a dentist, which as far as he's concerned,
is all the experience a congressman needs.
I was a dentist, and so every patient that walks in my office,
I have to be prepared for an emergency.
I'm a dentist, so science is a big deal to me.
As a dentist, I love the KISS theory-- keep it simple, stupid.
By the way, I'm a dentist, okay,
so I read body language very, very well.
Okay, half of those didn't even make sense.
He was just adding "as a dentist"
to the beginning of unrelated thoughts.
Yo, I'm a dentist,
so can I get this dry cleaning back on Tuesday?
I'm a dentist.
No, you're not currently a dentist.
You're working at another job.
You can't just use your previous job at this job.
"I'm a dentist."
"Would you like, uh, number two, as well, with that?"
And look, I agree being a dentist is the perfect job
to prepare you for being in Congress, you know?
Since you already have tons of experience
with people hating you.
But it turns out, there was one part of being a dentist
that Gosar did bring to Congress-- teeth whitening.
Except, instead of whitening teeth,
he's trying to whiten America.
NICOLLE WALLACE: "Few Republicans
"have been more linked
"to extremist groups that Mr. Gosar.
"'He's been involved with anti-Muslim groups
and hate groups.'"
In 2018, he dined with an extremist
anti-Muslim Belgian politician
at a London event organized by Steve Bannon.
And last month, he tweeted, then deleted
a reportedly neo-Nazi-themed video.
WALLACE: Gosar has aligned himself closely with leaders
of white nationalists and extremist groups,
people like Nick Fuentes, the 22-year-old leader
of the America First movement.
"Other conservative organizations have denounced him
as a holocaust denier and a racist."
"The Arizona Republican was the keynote speaker
"at a conference hosted by Mr. Fuentes's group in February,
the only member of Congress to participate."
Congressman Marjorie Taylor Greene,
along with Republican congressman Paul Gosar,
have been working to create a new House caucus
to help return America to its "Anglo-Saxon roots."
The document reads, "America is a nation
"with a border and a culture strengthened
"by a common respect for uniquely
Anglo-Saxon political traditions."
You know, I always find it funny how white supremacists want
to take America back to its roots.
But not like the original roots, you know?
Just like the roots of when white people were in charge.
We need to take this country back.
To when Native Americans were in charge?
No, no, no, no, too far back. Too far back.
Go forward, go forward.
Mm, to MLK?
No, no, no, too far forward.
Back, back, back. Back, back, back.
The Irish coming over?
Stop. Perfect.
Because let's be honest.
That's what he means by Anglo-Saxon traditions, right?
Like, when he says that, he's not talking
about knights in armor roaming the land on quests.
Although, that-that would be pretty cool.
"People of Arizona, I'm off to slay the mighty dragon
as a dentist."
Now the only thing that Gosar loves more than whiteness
is a really, really good conspiracy theory.
In fact he's claimed
the Democrats stole a Senate race in 2018,
he's claimed that the neo-Nazi rally in Charlottesville
was a false-flag operation secretly carried out
by George Soros, and he's claimed that the FBI
was behind the Capitol riot on January 6.
And that last one is especially weird, because one of the people
who arguably was responsible for January 6 was Paul Gosar.
NEWSMAN: Arizona congressman Paul Gosar firing up crowds
with lies about the election results.
Imagine this, that you go back home
once we conquer the Hill,
-Donald Trump is returned to being president, -(cheering)
and amazing things will happen with four more years.
NEWSWOMAN: In just the days before the riot, he tweeted:
Patriots, the time is now, hold the line,
join me in D.C. January 6.
#FightForTrump.
And in another he tweeted: Sedition and treason
for stealing votes is appropriate.
NEWSMAN: On the morning of the seige, he would send followers
this image, stating "Biden should concede."
He promptly went to Congress, stood up
and opposed the certification of the electoral college results.
I rise for myself and 60 of my colleagues to object
to the counting of the electoral ballots from Arizona.
NEWSMAN: The end of his speech interrupted by the very mob
he helped stir up.
Ah, the irony: interrupted by his own mob.
You see, this is why when you are fomenting a coup,
you got to coordinate, you know, send out a Doodle,
let the mob know you're speaking to overturn the election
at 1:30, so maybe they could overtake the police barricade
at 2:00, maybe, you know?
You know, the only thing worse than your mob showing up early
is your mob showing up late.
Because then you're just on the floor of Congress
going: And if you think Joe Biden is going to be president,
I have a few thousand friends who disagree!
Guys, where-where are you?
Don't use the bathroom now. Use it after.
This is the time. This is the time.
So, when you look at what he has done in Congress,
I'm not surprised the GOP doesn't care
about Gosar's anime video.
I mean, between the coup and the white supremacy,
this is the least offensive thing that he's ever done.
And the GOP might not be condemning Gosar's behavior,
but his own family is definitely picking up that slack.
NEWSMAN: Arizona congressman Paul Gosar
was whacked with this attack ad
by six of his brothers and sisters.
My name is Tim Gosar.
David Gosar.
Grace Gosar.
Joan Gosar.
Justin Gosar.
Jennifer Gosar.
Paul's absolutely not working for his district.
He's not listening to you.
And he doesn't have your interests at heart.
NEWSMAN: Gosar fired back on Twitter...
Goddamn! We need to get Paul Gosar
out of Congress and onto a Bravo show.
You telling me you wouldn't watch
The Real Gosars of Maricopa County?
I'm a dentist! I'm a private investigator!
I hate you! We hate you, too!
Eh!
Tune in.
I don't even want to imagine how stressful
Thanksgiving must be for Gosar's parents.
Think about it. You go to cook for a bunch of children,
and the entire mob that Paul brings.
You're not serving pumpkin pie this year?!
Well, let's see what my friends have to say about that!
Wait, where are you going? The bathroom again?
Come on, what did you guys eat?
You're killing me here. My mom is waiting.
Yeah, we got to prove a point to her.
Okay. Okay, I'll see you soon.
I'll be honest, though,
as awkward as this family dynamic is,
it's more surprising to me when someone does endorse a sibling.
I can't front. I mean, think about it,
siblings have experienced too much with you.
Like, I don't care if my sister and I
believe in all the same things--
she put my hand in warm water to make me pee in bed.
Nobody should do that to a 37-year-old.
So that's Paul Gosar.
Fringe politician. Anime fan.
And a man so awful he couldn't win votes
from his own family.
And I don't know about you guys,
but someone this awful,
they shouldn't be running anything in government.
And I don't say this as a talk show host.
I say this as someone who's been to the dentist.
All right, when we come back,
we won't just hear some marching bands,
we'll listen to them.
What does that mean? I don't know.
So stick around to find out.
Welcome back to The Daily Show.
If you've ever watched a college football game,
you know two things.
One, you could definitely have coached that team better,
and two, the marching band is pretty awesome.
But how much do you know about the history
of the marching band?
Well, Dulcé will fill you in
with another installment of Dul-Sayin'.
♪ ♪
Black marching bands.
It's the one time Black people get to march
without Fox News calling them rioters.
And we all love them.
Even those of us who got cut from one
just because our baton twirling was deemed dangerous.
Maybe those trombone players
should have stayed out of my strike zone. Hmm?
But marching bands are even more amazing
when you learn about their history.
For example you may not know this,
but Black marching bands actually started
in the same setting
as all your dad's favorite movies:
times of war.
You see, in colonial times,
Black men weren't allowed to carry weapons,
but they still had to serve in state militias.
So they were assigned to fife and drum corps instead,
and they needed a fife and drum corps back then
in case the armies ran out of bullets
and had to resort to a rap battle.
So, yeah, not letting the Black servicemen have guns was racist,
but there was actually an interesting side effect
of this racism, because over the next century,
the military pumped out
thousands of trained Black musicians
who took their marching band skills
back to their communities.
And that's definitely one of the best skills
to take out of the military.
I mean, who do you want at a party,
the guy who knows how to play drums
or the guy who knows how to dig a hole to poop in?
And all of this marching band culture
found a new home in 1890
when Tuskegee University started the first HBCU marching band.
It turns out college and marching bands
are a natural fit,
like college and STDs.
Over the next 50 years, marching bands popped up
at Alabama State, Florida A&M,
Kentucky State and other HBCUs.
But the big turning point came in 1946,
when Dr. William P. Foster at Florida A&M
discovered the missing ingredient,
choreography.
Dr. Foster taught his marching band new dance moves,
with help from a P.E. teacher named Beverly Barber.
And that must have been cruel for all those band nerds
who thought that going to college meant no more gym class.
Oh, you thought you were done running?
Mm-mm. Now you got to do it with a tuba.
But it was worth it, because choreography took marching bands
to the next level.
Adding dancing to anything
makes it more entertaining--
karaoke, in-flight announcements,
finding out you are not the father.
(cheering, shouting)
But the 1960s and '70s,
HBCU bands had gone mainstream.
They were playing Super Bowls,
and they even marched in JFK's inaugural parade,
which had to be the most memorable parade
JFK was ever in.
Wait.
That seems wrong.
Then Southern University's band changed the game again
when they started doing their own rendition
of Top 40 radio hits.
That earned them the nickname "the Human Jukebox,"
and it's a tradition that goes on to this day.
I'm telling you,
you haven't lived until you've heard
a marching band cover "WAP."
There's no lyrics, so all these old people
are dancing to it in the stands
and they don't even know they're getting down to a song
about lubrication. (chuckles)
Get nasty, Grandma!
It was also during this time
that bands made their next big move,
dancelines.
These started with the Golden Girls of Alcorn State
and spread to the J-Settes of Jackson State,
whose J-Setting technique became a big influence
on hip-hop dance.
And the J-Sets only happened because a majorette
named Shirley Middleton demanded that they be allowed
to dance in a more modern way,
and "Put down their batons."
I wish someone had gotten rid of batons
back when I was twirling.
Then I wouldn't have gotten sued so much.
The band got more CTE than the football team that year.
Today, the impact of HBCU bands
and their dances is all over pop culture.
They're in songs, movies, and they were even part
of Beyoncé's iconic Coachella performance.
That show changed the conversation.
It changed the culture.
I mean, just watching that again,
it changed my outfit.
Here's how popular Black marching bands are now.
Even Trump had one perform
at his inauguration. Between that
and all the cheating on his wife, he was just like JFK.
And just this year,
Vice President Kamala Harris was escorted
at the inauguration by the marching band
from her own alma mater, Howard University.
What an incredible moment that was.
Most people only reconnect with their alma maters
when they're getting hit up for donations.
I already made a donation.
It was called my tuition, and I had a full ride.
So the next time you see a Black marching band,
you'll know how they became the phenomenon that they are today.
Now, play me out. Aha!
Still got it.
Aha. See? Not so bad.
-(thudding) -Ooh.
-(clattering) -I'm not paying for that.
♪ ♪
Thank you so much for that, Dulcé.
All right, when we come back, the legendary Dwyane Wade
will be joining me right here in the studio.
You don't want to miss it.
Welcome back to The Daily Show.
My guest tonight is NBA superstar
and businessman Dwyane Wade.
He's here to share his new photographic memoir
about his legendary career
and building a legacy off the court.
Dwyane Wade, welcome to the show.
-Man, thank you. -And good to have you here
with, like, you know, a book that I...
I-I didn't know what to expect when I started reading it,
but it feels like a memoir in pictures.
It feels like a story of your life
and some of your inner monologue thoughts.
Like, what inspired this version of the book?
It is. It... That's exactly what it is.
I didn't... I didn't want to go at it
from a standpoint of, like, just words on a... on a paper.
-I've done that once, and it was great. -Uh-huh.
But, like, this time,
sitting down, thinking about, uh,
my responsibility and my role.
And I take it very seriously, uh, as a public figure.
-Mm-hmm. -And, you know, just understanding
that little Dwyanes need something to see.
-Right. -You know, like, reading something is great,
but when they can actually see the image
of the... of-of something, of someone,
I think that right there is more powerful.
So, for me, it was important that I show the human side
of, you know, what people look at as an athlete,
-because they met me as an athlete. -Right, right.
-Okay. Okay. -But I'm a human.
And so I wanted to show a little bit of that.
Yeah, it's a beautiful book divided into quarters, you know?
Uh, you know, like, your life has been this game
that you've been playing out.
I was a little disappointed, 'cause I was like,
"Well, it can't be four quarters,
because your life's not finished yet."
So then the next one's gonna be overtime.
You realize that, right?
-Didn't think of that. -(laughing)
I didn't... I didn't think of writing another book.
-I didn't... (laughs) -There's gonna...
-Your life is... -I was like, "This is... This is it."
Your life is... Do you ever think about that as an athlete?
It's like, you know, a lot of the time
for athletes and for the public,
sometimes your life "ends" when your career ends.
You know? Do you ever think about that
and-and how hard it is
to think about your next journey as a human being?
I mean, I know, you know, you're a husband. You're a dad.
You're a businessman now. But were you ever worried?
Was there ever a moment where you were like,
"Man, who is Dwyane Wade without the ball?
Who's Dwyane Wade without the hoops?"
1,000%. I mean, basketball is what I know.
Right? From the standpoint of I've focused my whole life
on trying to be great.
If you're trying to be great at something,
you understand that it takes all of your-your attention.
It takes all of your time.
And once I got to, like, my last year,
when I was like, "All right, I think I'm ready to walk away,"
I was like, "What am I gonna do next?"
And everybody tells you along the way, "You're gonna be fine.
-You're gonna have so many things going on." -(laughs)
You're like, "How? Where?"
And, you know, I took a few-- took a few months off,
maybe, like, two or three months,
and then I just said, "You know what,
"I'll talk with my team and let's say,
"'Let's get back to it. Let's just hit the ground running.
"'Let's take meetings and let's just see.
Let's see where my interests lies.'"
Because I didn't know. You know?
All I knew was I love the game of basketball
and I enjoy business and I enjoy making money.
I enjoy creating things. I enjoy designing things.
So, for me, it was like, let's find what that next step is.
So I feel that I'm in my rookie season in life again.
-I'm in the pregame. I'm in the pregame again. -Oh, I like that.
In-in this-- in this new-- this new step, this new walk.
If I-- if I had guessed
before reading the book and someone said to me,
"Okay, what are Dwyane Wade's passions?"
I would have gone, "Okay, basketball
-is definitely one of them." -Yes.
-I would have said fashion is definitely one of them. -Yes.
You know, Dwyane Wade's never been afraid to take a chance.
-(laughs) -Um, you know, I would have said
-wine is one of them. You know? -Yes.
But one thing I would have never said before reading the book
-was karaoke. -Oh. Listen...
You-You're a humble person,
but the one thing you have no humility about--
you-you call yourself the greatest karaoke singer
in the league. You're just like,
-you're the GOAT. -Well, when I was in the league.
-Yeah. You're the GOAT. -Now I'm out of the league,
-I'm-I'm the GOAT. -Oh, you're just the GOAT now?
It's not that-- it's not that I can sing.
I cannot sing to save my life.
It's that I will get up onstage anywhere to sing karaoke.
Like, I would go to local bars and just jump onstage.
-That's-that's the kind of person I am. -Wow.
I got to know the song. But you know what I mean.
-Yeah, but you-you just... -I do it anywhere.
-Do you have a favorite song?
Like, what is, like, Dwyane Wade's...
Well, my wife told me I need a new song,
because I've been doing the same one for about six, seven years.
-What-What's that song? -Montell Jordan, "This Is How..."
-You know. It's easy. -Okay.
I-I-- Why I like M-Montell Jordan,
-because it brings the energy. -I hear you.
Everybody know the words. Even if you don't the words,
-you know some of the words. -Right. Right.
-And so it's kind of crowd participation. -(laughs)
And I don't have to sing. I can deep-voice it.
So... But, yeah, I love it, man. I love it.
I-I did like the human side of, um, your story with LeBron.
You know?
I wasn't in... I wasn't in the U.S.
-When-when the whole move to Miami happened. -Yeah.
I wasn't in the U.S. for that chaos.
What do you think was the biggest thing
that people missed from LeBron coming to Miami?
You know, you-you share a few thoughts in the book
that I really enjoyed. You know, the conversation you had,
what were you trying... you were trying to achieve.
But what do you think people missed in that story?
What do you think the...
you know, people just didn't understand
about that move and the big three?
Well, I mean, I'm sure it was a lot
that-that people didn't... you know, didn't understand.
I mean, as athletes, you know, when you're-you're touted
-as one of the-the goods and the greats in the game... -Mm-hmm.
...they say these are the things you have to accomplish.
You have to get rings, you have to get MVP.
Like, it's all of these things, and so, you can't knock someone
for-for listening to that and going out and making sure
-that you put the best team around you to win. -Right.
-Mm-hmm. -So I think at that time, you know, I was come...
I had won a championship at 24.
I've been losing, losing, losing, losing.
I was tired of that. LeBron, you know,
for seven years is... you know, he got close once,
-but he was ready to, like, get over that hump. -Right.
Uh, Chris Bosh was an emerging star in Toronto.
Um, he was ready to get a little bit more light,
a little bit more attention.
So, I just feel like, man,
just to be young and to decide as young men
-that we want to do this, as friends. -Mm-hmm.
Um, and we understood at that moment
that we were shifting the culture of what the NBA was
-in that moment. -Yeah, it has... It'll never be the same.
-You know? -Player empowerment.
-Right. -That's what that move was about.
Your life has been one that is filled
with both tragedy and triumph.
I can't help wondering if that's why you've been as dedicated
to your family as you have been. You know, it feels like
Dwyane Wade has gone like,
"I want to win championships on the court,
but I want to win championships at home, as well."
And you know, I see that, you know, with, for instance,
-your son Zaire, who's playing in the game now. -Yeah.
I've seen your face light up when you watch him
and when you play against him.
And I've also seen, like, the journey
that you've been on with your daughter,
and just, like, talking through the challenges
of having a child who's trans and learning about it.
And I want to know a little bit more about that.
Everyone thinks the journey to understanding transpeople
and the conversation happens overnight.
-It wasn't overnight for you, and you had to learn. -No.
If you were to talk to another parent out there,
or somebody who just goes like, "Dwyane, this is just,
I don't get, this is wrong, I don't get it,"
what helped you to begin to understand
so that you could be the best parent to her?
Well, I think when things happen personally to you,
when you have a personal connection to something
or someone, you take it a little bit more serious.
But when it happens to you, you have to look at it in the face.
You have to, you know, right on, like my daughter
looking at me across the table,
I have to... this is something I need to deal with, right?
In the sense of, I don't know everything.
You know, and as a parent, you want to make sure that your kids
-come to you, you have answers. You know what I mean? -Mm.
You have the right words, you have the right, you know,
support, whatever it is, you have the right motivation.
And so at that moment I had no answers.
The only answer that I knew and that I had
that this is my child, I love them,
-and I hate the pain that my child is in, right? -Wow.
You know, seeing the pain of, you know,
not being able to feel... feel, you know, confident
-and comfortable in who you are, -Right.
That's not, you don't want to see no one live like that,
no one you love, and so immediately
wants to hug and embrace and... you see the just delight.
Like, I see Zaya's light.
And for me to... to be in a place
where I'm not trying to dim her light,
I'm trying to move out of the way
-and let her get all the light. -(laughing)
I just see a-a beautiful, you know,
blossoming 14-year-old girl who's, you know,
trying to find, you know, trying to pass her tests
at school just like everybody else.
-Yeah. Yeah. -She's trying to find friends that are new...
you know, this year, going back to school
-like everyone else. -Mm-hmm.
And, you know, my wife and I, you know, our whole role
and our whole job, and we understand this,
is, you know, to provide, to protect,
to love, um, to facilitate.
You know, we have all these rules.
It's not to... to own.
It's not to say: You're gonna be this
-and you're gonna do that. -Right.
It's to find out who they are, find out what their likes
and, you know, and what are their dislikes.
And try to help them, you know, through life,
-you know... -Be the best they can be.
Find themselves. It's not about us.
You know what I mean? It's not about us.
-That's hard to accept as a parent, huh? -Yeah.
But you're doing it. Dwyane Wade,
thank you again for joining me on the show.
-Congratulations. This is a really fantastic, -Thank you.
Uh, coffee table book -slash-memoir-ish vibe.
And I'm excited to see what Overtime is gonna bring, man.
Congratulations. Thank you, my dude.
-Oh, you got it? -Ooh...
That was quick. You still got those reflexes.
I like that. Dwyane Wade's new book Dwyane is available now.
We're gonna take a quick break,
but we'll be right back after this.
Well, that's our show for tonight, but before we go,
please consider supporting Gleaners Community Food Bank.
Gleaners provides food to more than 660 partner soup kitchens,
food pantries, shelters and other agencies
across the Detroit and South Michigan region.
They're a vital link between available food
and those who need it most, so if you want to support them
in their work this Thanksgiving, please donate at the link below.
Until tomorrow, stay safe out there,
get your vaccine, and remember,
if you are one of Taylor Swift's exes
who might have been shitty to her,
you might want to change your name to crypto.com.
Now, here it is, Your Moment of Zen.
♪ ♪
(applause)
Well, we have an important announcement to make
about one of our most beloved traditions,
which happens every New Year's Eve.
I got some folks are going to celebrate with me here.
'Cause here's the message.
We love New Year's Eve, in Times Square.
We want it to be big. We want it to be full of life.
We want it be a great New York celebration.
Guess what, everyone?
A big, strong, full-strength celebration,
it's coming back this New Year's Eve, Times Square.
Everyone come on down, we're celebrating.
(blowing noisemakers)
Excellent.