Superman in the comics-- they're, like, gonna
change something up, and Superman will now be bisexual.
-MAN: Oh. -And people are losing their minds.
One of my favorite things I saw online was
someone who was like, "This is ridiculous.
This is unrealistic!" And I was like,
"I'm sorry. The guy who comes from another planet
"and is weak because of green stones-- that guy...
That's... Him being bisexual is unrealistic?"
Let me tell you what's unrealistic.
What's unrealistic is Superman being straight.
That's unr... Why do we assume
that an alien person will come in
and have the same gender, any things as us?
Like, what's more realistic is Superman coming down,
saving people. "Thank you, Superman! Thank you!"
Then he's like, "Yeah. Now I'm gonna smash that donkey."
"Wait, what?"
"Yeah, that's what we do on our planet."
"Nah, nah, nah, nah. We're not cool with that, Superman.
"I don't know where you're from, and thanks for saving my life,
but that's some bullshit."
ANNOUNCER: Coming to you from the heart of Times Square,
the most important place on Earth, it's
The Daily Show.
Tonight-- Kyrie gets ejected,
your right to say (bleep),
and Phoebe Robinson.
This is The Daily Show with Trevor Noah.
Hey! What's going on, everybody?
Welcome to The Daily Show. I'm Trevor Noah.
Let's jump straight into today's headlines.
We kick things off with some big sports news.
And, no, I'm not talking about Kryie Irving.
We'll be getting to that later.
I'm talking about how last night the head coach
of the Las Vegas Raiders, Jon Gruden,
was fired from the team.
And now, usually, if a coach is fired
in the middle of the season,
his team must have been playing, like, really, really badly.
You know, like, the cheerleaders started rooting
for the other team bad.
But Gruden wasn't fired over how his team was playing.
No. He was fired over some e-mails that he wrote
to a colleague ten years ago.
Now you might be wondering, how bad could an email be
that gets you fired ten years later?
Well, this bad.
NEWSMAN: Last week, it was learned
Gruden used a racist trope
to describe NFL union chief DeMaurice Smith
in 2011 email, writing...
Then the floodgates opened last night,
with a New York Times report,
detailing even more troubling emails,
showing Gruden using offensive language
to insult NFL commissioner Roger Goodell,
also calling the league's first openly gay player,
Michael Sam, "a queer,"
disparaging players who protested
during the National Anthem,
panning the hiring of female referees,
and mocking league efforts to reduce concussions.
Goddamn! This dude hit everybody--
Blacks, gays, women, protesters, brain damage victims.
It's almost like he was competing
in a cancellation decathlon.
And I-I can't believe I have to say this, but people,
people, you should not be writing racist emails.
Just get up, walk over to your co-worker's desk
and say the "N" word in person.
It's called human interaction, people.
Have we forgotten this? Huh?
At the very least, though, be more original with your hatred.
I mean, Black people having big lips? Seriously, dude?
Like, if you're gonna be racist, at least think of something new.
I mean, y'all ever notice how white people are obsessed
with ceiling fans?
I don't know if it's true, but at least it's fresh.
Here's what I don't understand, okay?
Why is it that it's always the worst people
who are super motivated?
Like, most of us, most of us-- we would struggle
to even write this many emails, much less racist ones,
but then Gruden was pumping out racist emails nonstop.
This guy was getting spam emails from Crate & Barrel,
and he would write back,
"You know what bothers me about Nelson Mandela?
-I'll tell you what bothers me about..." -(buzzer sounds)
Um, Dulcé?
Hmm?
Sorry. Are we... are we still rolling?
What's hap... what's happening here? Did you...?
Yeah. Um, I'm practicing for a game show,
and I was like, "Ooh, a great way for me to be able
"to practice when I should be on a game show is
to be on a show and then hit a buzzer, and be like, 'Bam!'"
-(buzzer sounds) -You know, in front of the cameras and stuff
-so I don't get nervous. -Okay, I'm-I'm sorry.
-You're practicing for a game show... -Mm-hmm.
-...during this show? -"A" show, yes.
Yeah, but this is my show. You don't need to do...
-What are you doing? -Wow. Wow.
Our... our show.
There's a lot of people that work here.
-No, you are right. You are right. -I...
-I work here, too. Yeah. -It is our show, but I'm saying,
I'm trying to do the thing now, and then, like...
Oh, we talk about another white man being racist?
-Surprise. Surprise. -(laughing)
It was, like, "Oh, no, I can't believe
that this white man did the thing that they always do!"
-Yeah, but it's... He's the coach of a thing. It's... -So?
Listen, all he did was take notes in a locker room.
White people ain't that original when it comes to racism.
Yeah, but it's still newsworthy because, like, he-he did...
he said the wrong thing.
Ten years ago.
So you think he changed?
-No, I think he got worse. -(laughs)
My question is, why are we only finding out now?
Why are we only mad at him?
What about the person who sat on these emails
for ten years and waited?
So my question is...
Who was he sending these emails to?
Who was he sending the emails to,
and why was they sitting on them?
You need to ask the assistant coach.
You need to ask somebody who would benefit from his job.
I'm not saying he wasn't dead-ass wrong.
I'm just saying the racism he said...
Michelin... Lips like Michelin tires was racist ten years ago.
In 2011, when he typed it to his friend,
-(deep voice) his confidant... -(laughing)
it was racist. Why you wait?
Oh, man.
I feel like you've just gotten some more people fired.
-Um... -I'm just saying facts is facts.
No, I appreciate it, I appreciate it.
But thank you for that. I mean, the...
Don't do this thing, but that was great.
-So I can't hit this again? -No, no, no, just... Yeah.
Just don't, and, you know?
You can practice when we're done.
Let me just do this thing, and then we'll be done.
Um, anyway, let's move on to our next story.
Which is about sex.
You know, the thing you do when Netflix is down.
Now, not to brag, but, uh, I've had sex before.
-(Sloan laughs loudly) -At least seven times,
I mean, eight if you count that, uh, that dream.
But one sex term I've never heard about before,
this story, is called stealthing.
I don't know if you've ever heard of this term.
Apparently, it's when a guy secretly takes off his condom
during sex without telling his partner.
And not only is this a thing, it happens so often
that they had to pass a law against it.
California just became the first state to outlaw stealthing
or the removal of a condom without consent during sex.
Lawmakers say women and gay men are increasingly victims
of stealthing.
NEWSMAN: In a study two years ago,
12% of women said they had been a victim of stealthing.
And another study found that ten percent of men
admit they've done it.
Okay, people, what the hell is wrong with guys?
Like, a condom is, like, a safety harness
on a rollercoaster-- you need to wear it the whole time,
especially when things get crazy at the end.
Like, some men are so greedy.
You already got her to have consensual sex with you--
why have you got to sprinkle in the crime?
And the fact that ten percent of men admit to doing this
means the real number's way higher.
Like, that's the truth.
It's like when 50 Shades of Grey came out
and no one admitted to reading it.
It made half a billion dollars, so someone here is lying,
or one person is reading it a lot.
And look, man, this should be a crime,
because sex is all about consent.
If you're doing anything
that your partner doesn't want you to do,
that's a violation.
I mean, that's why before I have sex,
I always ask my partner, is it okay if I picture
the green M&M?
-They have to know that... -(buzzer sounds)
-Dulcé. -Hello!
I thought it would be fun to have a woman's perspective
on the stealthing thing
considering that I will probably have to deal with it.
Well, yes, definitely.
Again, the buzzer wasn't necessary.
You could just, like, I mean, I'm just saying...
-But no, please go ahead. -I am concerned about this
mainly because I have a tendency to sleep with undesirables,
You know, the broke, um...
Mainly the broke. And so I make a...
I make a conscious choice to not make people with them,
because, you know, you can't have the broke
shooting the club up because their aim is very good.
Well, that's what a lot of people are complaining...
I've never heard it phrased that way.
-I'm a Christian. -Yeah.
A lot of women have said: Listen, yes, I liked you,
yes, I liked you enough to have sex with you,
but what you've done now is you've taken away my choice
in this matter, because I did not consent to you,
A) I mean, just for, like, STDs and everything,
-but then also B) because, like you're saying, -Right.
now I might have baby issues.
What if we're in Texas? Now I just have to have a baby
because you, like, took off a condom?
Look, you tried to take a condom off your ashy dick
and didn't ask me.
So this is something you always have to worry about, Trevor,
'cause it's, like, 'cause if you really want a man
to sleep with you, like, if you're really trying
to make people with this man,
you're not gonna tell him to put one on anyway.
I'm learning so many things right now.
I mean, I live a wild life. I'm a nice lady.
All right, well, finally,
let's do what you probably have been doing
with everyone you know for the past two weeks
and talk about Squid Game.
And in case you're the one person who hasn't seen it,
Squid Game is like The Hunger Games
if everyone was sadder and older and, like,
a thousand percent more Korean.
In fact, Squid Game is now on track to become
the most watched Netflix show of all time.
Which is pretty wild when you think about it,
because unless you're Korean.
you have to watch it with subtitles.
I mean, I never thought the most popular TV show ever
would be a book.
And honestly, the popularity of the show
isn't just measured in ratings.
You can also see it in everyday stuff like this.
The popularity of the new Netflix show Squid Game
is giving a big time-boost to... shoes?
There's been nearly a 10,000% spike in demand
for white shoes according to new data,
more specifically Vans slip-ons.
It's believed that people are buying these up
to craft their Halloween costumes.
Like, like, who is looking
at all the costumes in Squid Game
and saying, "You know what I really need for Halloween?
"Those crazy shoes! See how crazy those shoes are?
That's what I need."
That's a very practical-minded trick or treat, it feels like.
You know, like, some people will look cool
in their slutty ghost Halloween outfits,
but when are you ever gonna wear it again? You know?
You can wear those shoes all the time.
All the time. But I'm not surprised.
I'm not surprised that Squid Game has become
such a popular Halloween costume.
I mean, everyone wants to pretend just for one night
that we're living in, like, a dystopian world where people
make life-or-death choices because they're trapped in debt.
That's, like, a cool, crazy idea.
(phone ringing)
Hello?
We are living in that world right now?
Oh. Oh, that's the whole point of the show?
Oh! Oh, now I...
(chuckles): Oh, man. Yeah, that-that makes so much sense.
Yeah. No, totally get it now. Totally get it.
All right. I love you, too. Bye.
-Sorry. -(buzzer buzzes)
(speaks Korean)
Yeah, listen. See, what I just said
was "hello" in Korean
because everybody getting all excited
about these Korean shows: you're late!
You're late. I've been watching Korean TV shows
since I was in high school, baby.
Atlanta. KTN.
Giving me Korean drama since 1997?
Have you see Mr. Queen? No.
Have you seen Rookie Historian? No.
You want to wear a real outfit? Watch a historical drama,
buy some hanbok and get your life together.
Out here wearing raggedy-ass shoes,
looking like a broke mobster. Stupid.
'Cause you in debt?
-Come on, son. -I-I wasn't...
Get a PPP loan like everybody else
and fix your shit.
(laughing)
I don't think that's how PPP loans work.
-No? -(laughs)
But I don't think anybody's...
I've never heard anyone being told to get one.
Everybody got it before. Why not?
They... It looks like they were doing absolutely no research
as to if people had businesses or not.
-I mean, anyone could just claim to have a business. -Yeah.
Yeah. People were just like, "I've got a business."
Right. And then they didn't have to submit
-any type of paperwork. -No.
-I wish you the... -(buzzer buzzes)
I wish you the best of luck on your game show, Dulcé.
Yeah. Uh, come to find out I'm doing The Price is Right,
so I didn't even need...
All I really had to practice today was "One dollar!"
Well, you know what?
I think we both still got something from this.
-Truly. -I-I enjoyed the surprise.
-Gracias. -And, uh, thank you
for putting me on more Korean shit.
(speaks Korean)
All right, that's all the time we got for headlines.
Let's jump straight into our main story
about the COVID vaccine.
You know, the miracle drug that almost eliminates
your risk of death from COVID
and lets Dr. Fauci record your dreams.
So, let's catch up
on the latest news on the vaccine
in our ongoing segment Vaccination Nation.
♪ ♪
Back when the vaccines first came out,
demand for them was huge.
They were basically harder to find
than a Republican congressman who admits Joe Biden won.
But not enough people wanted to voluntarily save their lives.
So then the problem became how to convince the holdouts
to get vaccinated, which is why recently,
everyone from the federal government
to airlines and hospitals
have been introducing vaccine mandates.
You want to work here? You got to get the shot.
But it turns out
people don't like being told what to do.
It's the same reason that when Moses
first brought down the Ten Commandments,
everyone immediately started coveting each other's wives.
"Well, I wasn't gonna covet Terry's wife,
but now that you mentioned her, damn!"
And for everyone who doesn't want
to be forced to take the vaccine,
the governor of Texas is definitely on their side.
Governor Abbott is going up against President Biden,
issuing an executive order
banning COVID-19 vaccine mandates.
The governor says no entity, including private businesses,
can require the vaccine for employees or customers.
In a statement, the governor said
the vaccine is safe, effective
and our best defense against the virus
but should remain voluntary and never forced.
Okay. Okay. That's an interesting tactic.
I mean, it's a little weird that he knows
the vaccine is our best defense,
but he still wants to let people opt out.
"We want to give COVID a fighting chance.
Wouldn't be sporting otherwise."
And, you know, i-it-it's funny
how Republican governors like Abbott
always say the government should never tell
private businesses how to do things,
and then they do just that
when it's in their political interest.
You know, it's like that one friend we have who's like,
"I think we should try and be vegetarian.
"Unless it's the popcorn chicken.
"Yeah, I mean, meat is murder,
but in this case, pass the hot sauce."
And I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie.
I've always found it weird
that governors in America are like mini presidents.
This is a very strange thing to me
coming from another country.
Because the president of America,
the president of America issues a mandate,
and now this guy who's in charge of a piece of America
gets to undo what the president said?
Like, can you imagine if a manager at Kinko's said,
"All right, everybody, let's, uh, make these copies."
And then the assistant manager was like,
"Nah, B. We producing Viagra now."
"Can you... Can you do that?"
"Well, that's for the courts to decide.
Yeah, we making dicks hard, yo."
But, hey, as it stands right now in Texas,
you can't get mandated to have the vaccine.
But here in New York, it's the opposite.
And you know who just learned that the hard way?
Kyrie Irving,
the Brooklyn Nets star and one of the only people
who can wear a shirt that says "Brooklyn"
without looking like a tourist.
He's been refusing to get vaccinated
even though that means he wouldn't be able to play
in his home arena.
So, today, the Brooklyn Nets told him
that if he doesn't play home games,
they're not gonna let him play any games.
And just guess,
just guess how much that's gonna cost him.
NEWSMAN: And now to breaking news
involving Brooklyn Nets star Kyrie Irving.
The team has decided that their point guard will not play
or practice until he gets vaccinated for COVID-19.
Irving was last seen at an outdoor practice
over the weekend at Brooklyn Bridge Park.
He is expected to lose-- get this--
about $380,000 per game
if he doesn't get a shot.
$380,000 per game?!
Per game!
Yo, to put that in perspective,
it would take Elon Musk 1.3 seconds
to make that much money.
I don't think that worked, actually.
Yeah, I need to stop measuring things in Elon Musk.
That really doesn't help.
But I actually respect Kyrie for this, man.
You know? Because that's how you know he's doing it
on principles.
He's like, "I'm willing to lose this money
because this is what I believe."
'Cause there are some anti-vaxxers out there
who are just doing it out of spite.
You know? They hate Fauci. They hate Biden.
But I bet if you offered them $380,000,
they'd be snorting that vaccine all day. Just like...
(sniffs) "Fauci!"
And it's funny how it seems like the Nets
were quick to suspend him, too.
You know? This is one of the problems
with being on a super team like the Nets.
Any other team would have begged Kyrie.
You know? But this, it takes away all your leverage.
He was like, "What are you gonna do if I don't play, huh?
"Rely on Kevin Durant and James Harden,
two of the greatest scorers of all time?"
"Uh, yeah."
"Damn. I didn't think of that."
Now, what's-what's really crazy about this
is that the vaccine hesitaters are saying
that there hasn't been enough time with the vaccines.
That's why they don't want to get them.
But it's already been so long
that people who got vaccinated early
are now getting booster shots.
Yeah. Unvaccinated people are getting lapped right now.
And you'd think that would motivate them
to try and catch up. But, apparently,
it is just making them even more hesitant.
NEWSMAN: According to a Kaiser survey,
the confusion over the booster just reinforces
the unvaccinated population to stay, well, unvaccinated.
One unvaccinated man in Ohio told the Times...
Okay.
You know, if I'm gonna be completely honest with you,
I can see where many of these people are coming from.
Just think about it.
You told me
this was the greatest vaccine of all time.
But now, ten months later, I've got to get a new one?
I mean, we expect that from Apple, not medicine.
At the same time though,
there's nothing unusual about needing a vaccine booster.
And not just vaccines. Everything on Earth
needs a booster.
It's not always a conspiracy theory.
Nothing lasts forever. You know?
Sometimes I think these are the same people who would walk in
on their family eating dinner and be like,
"Hold up, hold up, hold up.
"Didn't y'all eat yesterday?
I'm starting to think this whole food thing is a scam!"
And, by the way, it's important to remember
that vaccine hesitancy is only a problem
in the rich countries that have the vaccine.
'Cause, right now, there's countries all over the world
that can't afford it and they're looking through the window
at the buffet like,
"Oh, could you please bring me out a French fry and a vaccine?"
In fact, some people have been saying
that the pharmaceutical companies
should share the vaccine formula with developing countries
to allow them to produce it more cheaply.
And, today, one of those companies, Moderna,
responded to that by saying--
and I quote--
"hell no."
Moderna now refusing to share the formula
for its COVID vaccines,
dismissing calls for the company to do so
in order to boost supply in poorer countries.
The chairman and cofounder of the company saying
that instead of sharing the formula,
it would be more reliable and efficient
for Moderna to scale production itself.
Okay. Look, man, I get it.
Moderna is a business
and they want to make money themselves.
But at least come up with a better excuse.
You know? Like that the vaccine formula's an old family recipe.
You can be like, "Oh, I would love to give it to you,
"but my grandmother brought it with her from the old country.
You know?"
Be like, "Y-- The vaccine was invented last year."
"Yeah, my grandmother, she just got here last year.
But it's an old family recipe."
And, yeah, it is a business.
But their product could also save millions of lives.
And you just wish that they would want
to use their powers for good.
I mean, imagine if superheroes
had the same profit motives as these pharmaceutical companies.
I can tell you now, those movies would be hella different.
-♪ ♪ -(screaming)
Help me, Superman!
-Oh! -How much money do you have?
Uh, not much?
(screaming)
Bye.
(screaming continues)
(chuckles)
Actually, I... I kind of like that movie.
All right, those are all the vaccine updates we have.
Let's take a quick break. But when we come back,
Michael Kosta will learn how to swear.
You don't want to miss it.
Welcome back to The Daily Show.
Americans love free speech, or at least they say they do.
But what happens when someone's speech goes too far?
Well, Michael Kosta found out.
Freedom of speech-- it allows us to say things like,
"My boss is a giant dimple on legs,"
without having to fear any consequences, right?
Is that right?
And sometimes the fight
for our First Amendment freedoms is fought
by the unlikeliest heroes.
My name's Andrea Dick.
And back on May, the weekend
of Memorial Day weekend, I... On that Friday,
I put flags up, as you can see, that say, "(bleep) Biden."
NEWSMAN: Andrea Dick, who lives near a school, decked her home
in profanity-laced signs critical of President Biden.
KOSTA: After Mrs. Dick was fined by the Roselle Park
code officer, she took the town to court,
lost, and then appealed--
a legal battle that cost both sides
thousands of dollars and led to a lot of mean
Facebook comments.
I see six flags, seven if you count the
"Yes, I'm a Trump girl, get over it."
Why are... why are these seven signs so important to you?
Because I feel, honestly, that Trump won this election in 2020.
I literally think it was totally stolen from him.
You know, I kind of knew you were a Trump supporter
because I see that, uh, you have the bust
of his personal lawyer Rudy Giuliani
on your front step there.
What has Biden done to you?
Let me tell you something.
In the last four years-- well, now it's passed--
we were making money at my job, everything was going great.
We had tariffs on China, Canada, all over.
So then why don't the signs say Trump won the election?
Because I can't find anything with the election.
-Unless I go and have it made. -I see. Okay.
-So you didn't have these printed? -No.
-Where were they printed? -Believe it or not, China.
So maybe Mrs. Dick's free speech
was imported from Communist China,
but how could the mayor of Roselle Park,
Joseph Signorello, an American,
justify trying to silence her?
I mean, I would say less silencing,
more try to make sure people are good neighbors,
especially around children.
If she had posted a sign up that said,
"I disagree strongly with Joe Biden,"
would you have come after her?
She's had up, like, pro-Trump signs
plastered all over her house for the last three years,
which is totally allowable by our local ordinances,
but the code states that you can't have
explicit or offensive material,
a poster or any kind of signage outside of your house.
Wait, so the issue you have isn't with the message,
(bleep) Biden, it's with the actual word (bleep).
Yes. It's inappropriate, you know?
So you got curse words in front of little kids,
-Mm-hmm. -and you got families that need to explain
-what the F-bomb means. -I mean, I got to be honest with you.
First time I heard the word (bleep) was
from a third grade New Jersey elementary school student.
Roselle Park's snowflake mayor
might be afraid of adult expression,
but Mrs. Dick was determined to keep fighting
for the use of her favorite four-letter word.
Well, the judge asked me to take down--
one, two, three-- three of the signs.
-KOSTA: Yeah. -Anything that had (bleep) in it,
-he wanted me to take down. -Yeah.
And, of course, I didn't.
One of the complaints is that these kids,
these poor elementary school students,
they're seeing such profanity here.
Come on. They hear it at the park.
They got the trash music going.
Trash music like-like Stomp when they play the garbage cans?
No, when they start cursing.
-You know what I'm talking about. -Oh, okay, good.
-That rap shit they listen to, okay? -Okay, got it. Okay.
DJ Karen's deep knowledge of rap music was unexpected,
but would she be willing to do
what many successful rap artists do
and put out a clean version of her signs?
How would you feel,
in order to protect your neighbors' kids,
if we hung this one up instead?
No.
-I don't want that on my fence. -Why not?
'Cause I'd rather it say "(bleep) Biden"
'cause that's how I feel about him.
So, why would I lose my first amendment right
and give in to them?
That's why I fought it,
'cause it was my first amendment right.
KOSTA: After a local heavyweight lawyer
got behind her case, Mrs. D. won her appeal.
But what kind of wise guy-defending,
fast-talking Jersey law shark had she found to represent her?
The ACLU is the American Civil Liberties Union,
and we serve to defend
everybody's constitutional rights
regardless of the views they hold
and regardless of who they are.
KOSTA: Oh, shit! It's the mother(bleep) ACLU?
But why would they take this case?
We're worried about the implications
for everybody else. Right?
If you can't say "(bleep) Biden,"
then you won't be able to say "(bleep) Trump."
"(bleep) the future president."
"(bleep) Ted Cruz." "(bleep) Don Jr."
"(bleep) Ivanka Trump."
That's right. And-and, you know,
usually in our work,
the people that we're representing
are disfavored speakers or marginalized groups--
Black Lives Matter protesters,
immigrants' rights protesters--
and we recognize that, in order to protect that speech,
we also need to protect speech that we disagree with.
KOSTA: So the F-word plus "Biden" was protected speech
but the town's rules were actually equating the F-word
to the idea of people F-wording each other.
Was that also protected?
The ordinance that the city was trying to enforce here
deals with obscene content,
pornography, right, and-and nudity and things like that.
But it can't be attached to something
that has political value.
The test is about making sure
that we are protecting political speech every step of the way.
So, I can't display a video of myself
in Roselle Park having sex.
That would be a violation of obscenity.
But what if now I'm wearing a Joe Biden mask?
Is that protected now because it's the government?
You'd have to ask an expert to look at the video
before you put it up to determine whether or not
it would violate the law.
I have the video in my pocket right now.
Do y-- Do we want to-- Do you want to watch it?
And we can figure that out right now?
Uh, maybe off camera.
KOSTA: So just like my satirical and arousing video,
Mrs. Dick's sexually inappropriate
but clearly political language was protected
by our beloved American freedom of speech.
You know, the fact that you can even hang this up
and be protected legally,
I think, is a sign that this country's still kicking some...
(bleep) ass.
But I'm still not taking 'em down till Biden's out of office.
-2024. -Okay.
Then you can come back to me.
Are you being a little bit of a dick?
If that's what you want to call it, yeah. (laughs)
Thank you. Okay.
Thank you so much for that, Michael.
All right, when we come back,
the hilarious Phoebe Robinson
will be joining me live in the studio.
So don't go away.
Welcome back to The Daily Show.
My guest tonight is stand-up comedian, actor
and bestselling author, Phoebe Robinson.
She's here to talk about her new HBO comedy special,
her third book of essays
and disrupting the publishing industry.
Phoebe, welcome to the show.
Hi. I sound way more impressive through your accent.
I'm like, "Oh, my God, who's this woman?"
It is an impressive resume, though. I mean, even...
Not even... even if it's not in my accent,
it's really impressive.
And I'd love to know, what is the end goal?
Are you... are you trying to Oprah this thing?
Are you trying to Shonda Rhimes it?
Are you trying to, like...?
What-what is the end goal for Phoebe?
Because it feels like you are mogulling this thing
-one day at a time. -Yeah.
-I would love to be the baby of Shonda and Oprah. -Okay. Okay.
Just like a super Black baby
who is, like, out here dominating everything.
But, no, really, I just, like, have a lot of fun creating,
and I really think I learned so much
from 2 Dope Queens and just how much
Jessica and I were really creating a platform
-for other people to get their stuff out there. -Right.
So I really am like, "Oh, this is so cool."
So I want to do more of that.
I love how all of your books turn into something.
-You know? Um... -Yeah, you, too.
Your books are great to read. Your-your...
You know what I love about reading your books is,
-they sound like you hanging out with me, but on a page. -Yes.
That's what it always feels like when I read your books.
Oh, thank you so much.
You know? And this one is no different.
Please Don't Sit On My Bed in Your Outside Clothes.
-Mm-hmm. -Sounds a little bit like something
my mom would say to me without the "please."
My mom wouldn't say "please" at all.
This would be an instruction.
So the book is essays from your life--
how you think, how you see the world.
I love that part of it is you just giving us lessons.
Like, one of my favorites-- I paraphrase it.
Basically, like, what Warren Buffett hasn't told you--
-this could have been an email. -Yeah.
Just, like, how to be a CEO.
Let's talk a little bit about that.
You know, we live in a world, where for a long time,
many Black women were-were,
you know, in many ways, restricted to certain roles.
You know, it's like, "Oh, you can only do this, you can
only do that. You can't be running things."
Slowly, we've seen those things change.
It hasn't completely changed,
but we're seeing the changes that take place.
You're one of the success stories.
What have you learned in a world
that wasn't necessarily designed for you
but is now in some way, shape or form being shaped by you?
Oh, wow, to think that I'm, like, shaping anything feels...
I will happily take that compliment. Thank you so much.
I think, you know, all of the industries
that were-- and you're an author, too, as well--
they're predominantly white,
and so you get a lot of pushback initially,
and then sort of once you become a little more well known
or a little more proven, the doors open up a little bit more.
And so I think the biggest thing I've taken away from this
is, like, just don't let anyone's "no" stop you.
I know, like, it's hard to persevere at times
because you're just kind of, like, I don't know.
I'm, like, trying, I'm trying, I'm not getting anywhere,
but I'm always, like, I feel like
we've always proven people wrong.
And so that's been the biggest thing.
It's, like, don't doubt yourself.
Like, don't trust the outside person tell you that you...
Like, I had so many people tell me, like, I'm not funny,
that I don't have what it takes, so all these things.
I'm like, look at where...
I'm across from you with your perfect skin,
your perfect Fro, and I'm talking about a book I wrote.
I mean, come on. That's a win!
I think a lot of people can write a book.
Not anyone can become a New York Times bestseller
as you have,
and even fewer people can stop their own imprint.
I've never even thought of that.
I genuinely was just like, wait, Phoebe's...
you're going to be the imprint now, Tiny Reparations?
-Greatest name I've ever come across, by the way. -Thank you.
What's the plan for that? What are you hoping to achieve?
Yeah, we're highly curated, so we're publishing
three to five books-- we have five books coming out next year,
and then five more in 2023.
Right? Yes. Um, and I'm really excited about it.
It's literary nonfict... sorry, literary fiction,
nonfiction, essay questions and some poetry.
Which I'm very jazzed about.
And I just wanted it to be a place that will make authors
feel welcomed, and they wouldn't have to go through
what I went through back in 2015.
Like, only one publisher, my publisher Plume, said yes to me.
Everyone else was like, your book won't sell,
it's not relatable, nobody wants to read books
written by funny black women.
Like, got so much negative feedback.
-Wow. -In 2015, I was like, there's no way
that I'm going to, on my watch,
anyone's gonna say anything like that.
Before I let you go, I have to talk to you
about one of the most exciting moments
-in a comedy person's life. -Yes.
And that is doing their solo special.
-This is big. I mean, this is... -ROBINSON: Yeah.
-NOAH: This is Phoebe. -ROBINSON: Yeah.
NOAH: On HBO. Just you.
What is the balance of, like, nerves versus excitement?
I... That was, like, always... When I started stand-up,
it was do a late-night set on Letterman.
-Uh-huh. -That didn't happen.
Half-hour special on Comedy Central.
(chuckles): That didn't happen.
One-hour special, HBO.
So, I feel like my dream has come true.
-I was very nervous. -Wow.
Because I was just like...
You know, it was, like, Chris Rock and Wanda Sykes
and Margaret Cho. Like, I'm gonna be in this group?
And it feels like, "LOL, do I belong?"
But it also was really sort of like, "I put in the hard work."
And you know how it is. Like, you do your first special,
you feel like everything is riding on it
'cause you, like, you dreamed about this moment
-for so long. -Yeah, this is it. Yeah.
So, I'm really excited. I think people are gonna love it.
And I really wanted it to be something light and uplifting
during this time because we are all so weary and tired,
and I want people to just laugh for an hour.
-That's all. -I mean... I mean, we're just gonna watch you
turn into, like, a super mogul, and we're just gonna enjoy it.
Yeah, and I'm not gonna talk to you in ten years.
I'll be like, "Trevor who?"
-I-I like that, actually. -(laughing)
I like it. I would like it if everyone I knew now
doesn't talk to me in ten years because they're that successful.
And I'll just wave from far, be like, "Phoebe!
-Remember the hair?" -"Huh? No, I don't."
-"Well, it was nice knowing you." -(chuckles)
Thanks for being here with me. I appreciate you.
-Thanks for having me. -Phoebe's book
Please Don't Sit on My Bed in Your Outside Clothes
is available right now.
Her HBO Max comedy special,
Sorry, Harriet Tubman, will be available October 14th.
We're gonna take a quick break,
but we'll be right back after this.
Well, that's our show for tonight. But, before we go,
please consider supporting the National Indigenous Women's
Resource Center.
It's a Native-led nonprofit organization
dedicated to ending violence against Native women
and children by offering culturally-grounded resources,
technical assistance and training
and policy development to strengthen tribal sovereignty.
If you want to support them in this work,
then please donate at the link below.
Until tomorrow, stay safe out there,
get your vaccine and, remember,
if your partner tries to pull off his condom
midway during sex,
you staple it to his penis.
Now here it is, Your Moment of Zen.
$356,000 was spent of your money
studying whether or not Japanese quail
are more sexually promiscuous on cocaine.
Shouldn't someone ask whether it is wise
to spend $300,000 studying Japanese quail
to see if they more-- are more sexually promiscuous on cocaine?
How 'bout the $300,000 we spent on Japanese quail?
-Japanese quail. -To see if they're
-more sexually promiscuous... -...on cocaine.
The answer's yes!