♪
>> Announcer: FROM
NEW YORK CITY, THE ONLY CITY IN
AMERICA, IT'S THE SHOW THAT
INVENTED NEWS.
THIS IS "THE DAILY SHOW" WITH
YOUR HOST, JORDAN KLEPPER!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
♪
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> Jordan: WELCOME TO
"THE DAILY SHOW!"
I'M JORDAN KLEPPER.
IT IS MY THIRD NIGHT HOSTING THE
SHOW AND I'M FINALLY STARTING TO
GET SOME RESPECT.
THIS MORNING, THE SHOW'S
SECURITY GUY CALLED ME
"MR. KLEPPER" INSTEAD OF
"SLENDER MAN."
SO MAKING PROGRESS.
WE'VE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU
TONIGHT.
MY GUEST TONIGHT IS
MICHAEL SHANNON.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
SO LET'S GET INTO HEADLINES!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
♪
LET'S BEGIN WITH FOX NEWS, WHICH
YESTERDAY AGREED TO PAY
$787.5 MILLION FOR SAYING TO
DOMINION VOTING MACHINES HELPED
JOE BIDEN STEAL THE ELECTION.
ALTHOUGH, NOW THAT MORE DETAILS
OF THE SETTLEMENT HAVE COME OUT,
IT TURNS OUT IT IS NOT ALL BAD
NEWS FOR FOX.
>> THE DEAL SPARING FOX FOR MOST
WOULD HAVE BEEN A VERY
HIGH-PROFILE TRIAL WITH SOME OF
THE NETWORKS OWN STARS LIKELY
TESTIFYING.
>> DOMINION'S LEGAL TEAM SAYS
THERE WILL BE NO ON-AIR
APOLOGIES OR RETRACTIONS ON
FOX NEWS.
>> IN A STATEMENT, THE NETWORK
IS SAYING,
"THE SETTLEMENT REFLECTS FOX'S
COMMITMENT TO THE "HIGHEST
JOURNALISTIC STANDARDS."
>> Jordan: THAT'S RIGHT, HIGH
JOURNALISTIC STANDARDS LIKE,
LIKE THIS.
>> THE GREEN M&M GOT HER BOOTS
BACK BUT IS APPARENTLY NOT A
LESBIAN MAY BE?
>> Jordan: DOMINION IS NOT THE
ONLY INJURED PARTY HERE.
MAY BE ABOUT OUR FAITH IN
DEMOCRACY?
THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO DO NOT
TRUST ELECTIONS FOR THE REST OF
THEIR LIVES.
AND I HAVE TO TALK TO THOSE
PEOPLE!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
AND I WILL BE ARGUING WITH THEM
AT TRUMP RALLIES EVERY FOUR
YEARS FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE.
YOU KNOW WHAT, I AM NOT NAIVE.
I DIDN'T EXPECT THIS LAWSUIT TO
RESTORE OUR COUNTRY'S FAITH IN
ELECTIONS OR EVEN FOR ME TO GET
A LITTLE CASHOLA, NO, BUT I WAS
AT LEAST HOPING TO GET A COUPLE
OF WEEKS OF JOY,
SEAN HANNITY UP THERE ON THE
STAND, SWEATING THROUGH HIS
SHIRT LIKE A BEACHED MANATEE!
IT WOULD HAVE BEEN NICE TO SEE.
THEY ARE NOT EVEN GOING TO
APOLOGIZE ON AIR.
FRANKLY, WE DESERVE THAT.
THEY ARE MINIMUM.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
YES.
YOU DESERVE THAT.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
IF THE SETTLEMENT WON'T GIVE IT
TO YOU, THEN I SHALL.
>> THERE IS MUCH FALLOUT THIS
EVENING, AND THERE WILL BE FOUR
MONTHS.
WE ARE ADMITTING THAT WE LIED TO
YOU FOR SAYING WRONG THINGS
ABOUT THE 2020 ELECTION.
WHY IS THAT?
WELL, THE TRUTH IS, DONALD TRUMP
LOST THE ELECTION AND NO, WE
DIDN'T TELL YOU BECAUSE WE DON'T
CARE WHAT YOU THINK THEY ARE
GOOD NOW WE HAVE TO PAY HUNDREDS
OF MILLIONS OF DOLLARS.
WE WERE WRONG.
WE ARE COMPLETELY IRRESPONSIBLE
AND WE ARE SORRY, AMERICA.
I AM SORRY FOR REPEATING
SOMETHING IT WAS UNTRUE.
I'M SORRY.
IT'S GOT TO TAKE A QUICK BREAK
AND GO CRY IN A CLOSET WHILE
SQUEEZING A STUFFED ANIMAL.
>> Jordan: THANK YOU, TUCKER.
WELL SAID.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
LET'S MOVE ON.
BECAUSE LUCKILY, THERE ARE
PEOPLE OUT THERE DOING THE HARD
WORK OF REAL INVESTIGATIVE
JOURNALISM.
PEOPLE LIKE BRUCE WILLINGHAM.
HE RUNS THE
"McCURTAIN GAZETTE-NEWS" OUT OF
MIDDLE-OF-NOWHERE OKLAHOMA.
BRUCE SUSPECTED THAT LOCAL
OFFICIALS WERE CONTINUING TO
CONDUCT COUNTY BUSINESS AFTER
MEETINGS HAD ENDED,
SO HE SECRETLY RECORDED THEM.
WHEN HE PLAYED THE TAPE BACK, HE
HEARD THEM TALKING ABOUT HIS
SON, WHO WAS ALSO A REPORTER,
AND IT WAS NOT FLATTERING.
>> THE RECORDINGS CAPTURED THE
GROUP TALKING ABOUT HIRING
HITMEN TO KILL THE REPORTERS AND
WHERE THE BODIES COULD BE
HIDDEN.
>> I'VE KNOWN TWO OR THREE
HITMEN THAT WERE VERY QUIET
GUYS.
>> YEAH?
>> AND WOULD CUT NO [BLEEP]
MERCY.
>> YEAH.
>> I KNOW WHERE TWO BIG DEEP
HOLES ARE HERE IF YOU EVER NEED
'EM.
>> I'VE GOT AN EXCAVATOR.
>> WELL, THESE ARE ALREADY
PRE-DUG.
[AUDIENCE REACTS]
>> Jordan: HOLY SHIT.
YOU CAN THREATEN TO KILL
JOURNALISTS IN A COUNCIL
MEETING.
KEEP THAT SHIT ON TWITTER LIKE A
NORMAL PERSON.
ALTHOUGH, YOU CAN TELL THAT SOME
PEOPLE WERE A LITTLE MORE
INTEGRAL TO THIS PLOT THAN
OTHERS.
BECAUSE ONE GUY WAS LIKE,
"I KNOW TWO HITMEN,"
AND ANOTHER GUY IS LIKE,
"AND I KNOW TWO HOLES!"
THANKS FOR THE CONTRIBUTION,
LARRY, WE'LL LET YOU KNOW IF WE
NEED TO USE YOUR CONNECTION WITH
THE, UH, HOLES.
AND BY THE WAY, HOW STRAPPED FOR
TIME ARE PEOPLE IN THIS TOWN
THAT THEY HAVE TO PRE-DIG MURDER
HOLES?
ARE YOU SO [BLEEP] BUSY THAT YOU
CAN'T DO THE HOLE AFTER YOU DO
THE MURDER?
OR MAYBE IT'S LIKE CARRYING AN
UMBRELLA.
THE DAY YOU DON'T HAVE THE HOLE
IS WHEN YOU END UP KILLING
SOMEONE.
NOW LOOK, IT WOULD BE BAD ENOUGH
IF PLOTTING TO THROW LOCAL
JOURNALISTS INTO HOLES --
PRE-DUG OR OTHERWISE --
WAS ALL THAT THE COUNTY SHERIFF
AND HIS FRIENDS WERE CAUGHT
DOING ON THESE TAPES.
BUT GUESS WHAT,
THEY MOVED ON TO SOMETHING ELSE.
>> ON THAT SAME AUDIO RECORDING,
THE PEOPLE TALKING SHARED THEIR
DISMAY THAT LYNCHING
BLACK PEOPLE IS NO LONGER
ACCEPTABLE.
>> I'M GONNA TELL YOU SOMETHING.
IF IT WAS BACK IN THE DAY, WHEN
THAT WHEN [BLEEP] WOULD TAKE A
DAMN BLACK GUY AND WHOOP THEIR
ASS AND THROW HIM IN THE CELL.
I'D RUN FOR [BLEEP] SHERIFF.
>> YEAH, WELL, IT'S NOT LIKE
THAT NO MORE.
>> I KNOW, TAKE THEM DOWN TO THE
MUD CREEK AND HANG THEM UP WITH
A DAMN ROPE.
BUT YOU CAN'T DO THAT ANYMORE.
THEY GOT MORE RIGHTS THAN WE
GOT.
[AUDIENCE REACTS]
>> Jordan: WOW.
SOMEONE TELL THESE COPS THAT
THEY HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN
SILENT!
AND YOU CAN TELL THIS THING WAS
GONNA GO BADLY AS SOON AS THEY
SAID "BACK IN THE DAY."
NO SENTENCE IN THE SOUTH EVER
GOES WELL AFTER THE PHRASE
"BACK IN THE DAY."
IT'S NEVER LIKE,
"BACK IN THE DAY, WE LIVED IN A
RICH, MULTI-CULTURAL TAPESTRY."
WHAT'S CRAZY IS THESE REPORTERS
WEREN'T EVEN LOOKING FOR RACISM
AND ASSASSINATION PLOTS.
THEY WERE HOPING TO CATCH
IMPROPER MEETING PROCEDURES.
IT'S LIKE IF YOU PUT A SECURITY
CAMERA UP IN THE OFFICE TO SEE
WHICH EMPLOYEE WAS STEALING THE
YOGURTS, AND YOU CAUGHT THEM
DOING A HUMAN SACRIFICE.
YOU'D BE LIKE, "OH, MY GOD, I'VE
STUMBLED UPON THE MOST UNHOLY
RITUALS --
AND OH, MY GOD, THEY ARE EATING
MY CHOBANI!"
FOR MORE ON THIS STORY, WE GO
LIVE TO OKLAHOMA AND
ROY WOOD JR.
ROY!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> WHAT OUTCOME A MAN
>> Jordan: THIS IS AN
ASTOUNDING SCOOP.
SHADY SHERIFFS CAUGHT ON A
RECORDING TALKING ABOUT MURDER,
HIT MEN, BEING RACIST.
WHAT A STORY.
>> AND THANK YOU FOR SENDING ME
EXACTLY TO WHERE IT HAPPENED,
JORDAN.
HERE IS THE THING.
IF YOU PUT A RECORDER NEXT TO
ANY SHERIFF FOR A FEW MINUTES,
YOU'RE GONNA HEAR SOME RACISM.
I DON'T TRUST ANY SHERIFF,
ANDY GRIFFITH, WOODY FROM
"TOY STORY."
AND I DAMN SURE DON'T TRUST ANY
OF THOSE "POP PATROL" DOGS.
>> Jordan: ARE THEY ALL COPS?
>> I DON'T KNOW, BUT I DON'T
TRUST THEM.
IF I'M BEING HONEST, I'M KIND OF
SURPRISED THAT THIS RECORDING
WASN'T MORE RACIST.
>> Jordan: REALLY?
THEY WERE SAYING THAT IT'S TOO
BAD THEY COULDN'T KILL BLACK
PEOPLE, LIKE BACK IN THE DAY.
>> YEAH, BACK IN THE DAY.
SO WE'RE CANCELING PEOPLE FOR
REMINISCING NOW?
A [BLEEP] CAN'T TAKE A WALK DOWN
MEMORY LANE?
THAT'S ALL THEY DID.
EITHER WAY, THEY KNOW THEY CAN'T
DO IT ANYMORE.
THAT'S WHY WHEN THEY WAS ON
TAPE, THEY WERE TALKING ABOUT
KILLING WHITE PEOPLE.
THAT IS PROGRESS.
THAT IS WHAT MARTIN LUTHER KING
WAS TALKING ABOUT.
>> Jordan: NO, NO, I HAD A
POSTER OF HIS FUTURE MIGHT CALL
THE STORM REMOVE HIM THEM AND
THEY ARE JUST TALKING ABOUT
KILLING WHITE PEOPLE.
THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT KILLING
WHITE JOURNALISTS.
WE NEED TO PROTECT THESE
LION-HEARTED, IVORY-SKINNED,
MICHIGAN-BORN REPORTERS, WHOEVER
THEY MAY BE!
>> STOP BEING A BITCH.
WHAT ARE YOU SO SCARED OF, MAN?
I'M NOT SAYING THEY SHOULD
KILL -- I'M NOT SAYING THEY
SHOULD KILL WHITE PEOPLE.
I'M SAYING, WE CAN AGREE THAT
IT'S BETTER THAN KILLING BLACK
PEOPLE.
>> Jordan: ROY, WE CANNOT
AGREE ON THAT.
>> OH, SO YOU'RE SAYING IT'S
BETTER TO KILL BLACK PEOPLE?
>> Jordan: NO, NO,'S ROY,
THAT'S NOT WHAT I'M SAYING.
I WANT THEM TO KILL US BOTH
EQUALLY, ALL RIGHT?
THESE COPS SHOULDN'T BE TALKING
ABOUT KILLING ANYONE ANYWAY.
>> BUT CAN YOU BLAME THEM?
LOOK AT THIS SMALL ASS BUILDING,
MAN.
THEY WORK IN THIS BUILDING EVERY
DAY.
IF I HAD TO SPEND MY WHOLE DAY
IN A SPACE AT SMALL, IB RACES
TOO.
TINY ASS, NO VENTILATION.
IF YOU A WHITE MAN AND YOUR LIFE
HAS LED YOU TO A JOB IN THIS
BUILDING, YOU GOT TO BLAME
SOMEBODY.
MIGHT AS WELL BE US.
IT IS LIKE THE THIRD HOUSE FROM
THE THREE LITTLE PIGS.
>> Jordan: ENOUGH ABOUT THE
BUILDING.
LET'S TALK MORE ABOUT THE AUDIO
RECORDING.
>> YEAH, LET'S TALK ABOUT THE
AUDIO RECORDING.
LET'S TALK ABOUT THE AUDIO
RECORDING AND HOW THEY WEREN'T
ABLE TO SEE A TAPE RECORDER IN
THIS SMALL ASS BUILDING!
THE TAPE RECORDER PROBABLY TOOK
UP HALF THE ROOM!
YOU KNOW THEY FELT THE HEAT FROM
THE BATTERIES.
THEY WAS PROBABLY IN THE ROOM
LOOKING OVER, OH, I'M SORRY,
WHAT DID YOU SAY ABOUT LYNCHING?
I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THIS TAPE
RECORDER.
>> Jordan: WHAT DO YOU THINK
SHOULD HAPPEN TO THESE OFFICERS,
ROY?
>> I THINK WHAT SHOULD HAPPEN TO
THE OFFICERS IS VERY SIMPLE,
JORDAN.
THEY PLOTTED A MURDER, WHICH
LAST I CHECKED IS A CRIME.
SO FOR THE SOCIETY, WE CANNOT
ENTRUST THESE TYPES OF PEOPLE
WITH PROTECTING THE CITIZENS OF
OKLAHOMA.
THEY HAVE TO BE LOCKED UP, THEY
HAVE TO BE PLACED IN SOLITARY
CONFINEMENT, BECAUSE THEN THEY
WOULD HAVE MORE BREATHING ROOM
THEN THEY HAD IN THIS DAMN TINY
ASS BUILDING!
IT IS SMALL, MAN!
YOU CAN'T EVEN FART IN THERE!
>> Jordan: ROY WOOD JR.,
EVERYONE.
WHEN WE COME BACK, DON'T GO
AWAY.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> Jordan: WELCOME BACK TO
"THE DAILY SHOW."
FLORIDA GETS A LOT OF ATTENTION
BECAUSE OF HOW FLORIDA IT IS.
BUT IT IS NOT THE ONLY STATE OUT
THERE.
THAT'S WHY I TRAVELED TO
MICHIGAN FOR MY HOME STATE, TO
INTERVIEW WITH GOVERNOR,
GRETCHEN WHITMER, ABOUT HOW
SHE'S MAKING MICHIGAN THE
OPPOSITE OF FLORIDA.
LAST FALL, MICHIGAN
GOVERNOR GRETCHEN WHITMER CREWS
TO REELECTION WITH A
DOUBLE-DIGIT WIN AGAINST A
TRUMP-BACKED ELECTION DENIER.
DEMOCRAT CONTROL OF BOTH THE
HOUSE AND SENATE HAS ALLOWED HER
TO MAKE UNFETTERED PROGRESS IN
INFRASTRUCTURE, ABORTION RIGHTS,
AND GUN REGULATIONS.
AND NOW JUST PASSED 100 DAYS
INTO HER SECOND TERM, I WANTED
TO HEAR WHAT IS NEXT.
SO I WENT BACK HOME TO MICHIGAN
TO LEND MY SUPPORT TO THE VITAL
LOCAL BEER MAKING ECONOMY.
IN MICHIGAN, WE PREGAME WITH OUR
FRIEND AND FAMILIES BEFORE
WOLVERINE SATURDAY AND NOW
APPARENTLY BEFORE INTERVIEWS
WITH THE GOVERNOR.
WE WILL DO A MICHIGAN TEST TO
SEE YOUR SOBRIETY.
CAN YOU SPELL YPSILANTI?
>> Gov. Whitmer: Y-P --
>> Jordan: WOW.
[LAUGHTER]
>> THANK YOU.
>> Jordan: GOVERNOR, IS AS AN
OPPOSITE AOC?
A SUCCESSFUL POLITICIAN BECOMES
A BARTENDER?
>> Gov. Whitmer: I HAVE TO
HAVE SOME SKILLS AFTER THIS IS
DONE.
>> Jordan: JUST WANT TO REMIND
YOU, THE GOVERNOR CANNOT ACCEPT
ANY CASH OR TIPS BUT I CAN.
WHATEVER YOU WANT TO LEAVE, THAT
WOULD BE GREAT.
REMEMBER, THINGS COST THREE
TIMES AS MUCH A NEW YORK.
SO TYPICAL.
>> Gov. Whitmer: YOU SHOULD
MOVE BACK TO MICHIGAN, AM I
RIGHT?
>> Jordan: CHEERS, GOVERNOR,
THANK YOU FOR MEETING ME.
>> GLAD TO BE HERE.
>> Jordan: HAPPY TO BE HERE.
AND A MICHIGAN HEALTH FOOD STORE
AND MICHIGAN BREWERY.
>> Gov. Whitmer: MICHIGAN
BREW.
>> Jordan: I AM FROM
KALAMAZOO.
I AM BACK IN THE BREWERY.
[LAUGHTER]
IN MICHIGAN, THAT IS
STATISTICALLY LIKELY.
EITHER GOING TO BE A
MICROBREWERY OR A PARKING LOT.
SO MICHIGAN GOES TRUMP IN 2016
COME ABIDING IN 2020, IT GOES
YOU OVERWHELMINGLY IN 2022.
WHAT IS HAPPENING IN MICHIGAN?
>> Gov. Whitmer: WE ARE THE
MOST DIVERSE SWING STATE IN THE
COUNTRY.
I THINK THAT IS WHAT MAKES IT SO
GREAT.
IT IS ALSO WHY YOU GOT TO LISTEN
TO PEOPLE, GOT TO TALK TO
PEOPLE, GOT TO TRY TO SOLVE
PROBLEMS INSTEAD OF JUST BEING
ANGER.
>> Jordan: YOU ARE IN
MICHIGAN.
THE HEAD OF THE G.O.P.,
INTERNALLY ELECTED, HE WENT ON
SYMPATHIZER, ELECTION DENIER,
CALLING DEMOCRATS DEMONIC.
>> Gov. Whitmer: [LAUGHS]
THE HEAD OF THE G.O.P., TO YOUR
POINT, SAID THAT BOTH YOGA ARE
SATANIC.
>> Jordan: WALK THE LINE ON
SATANIC BEYONCE?
>> Gov. Whitmer: I WAS GOING
TO MAKE A SEAT AT THE TABLE FOR
SOMEONE WHO ACTUALLY WANTS TO
SOLVE PROBLEMS REGARDLESS OF
WHAT THEIR POLITICAL BENT IS
WHAT I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR
PEOPLE WHO WANT TO CALL BEYONCE
SATANIC.
>> Jordan: THERE IS A BIG
HUNTING CULTURE AND MICHIGAN
P.R. TO GO YOU'RE ABOUT TO PASS
THE BIG GUN CONTROL MEASURES
HERE.
WHAT DO YOU SAY TO THE
GUN OWNERS HERE WHO STILL
REALLY, REALLY WANT TO KILL
DEER?
>> Gov. Whitmer: YOU DON'T
NEED ANY FANCY GUNS, YOU CAN
STILL HUNT AND ENJOY.
THIS WILL BE A LAWFUL GUN OWNER.
MOST GUN OWNERS BELIEVE THAT
THERE SHOULD BE BACKGROUND
CHECKS AND SAFE STORAGE.
VIRGINIA HAS DONE THIS, IT ISN'T
THAT WILD CHANGES, IT IS JUST
SIMPLY TRYING TO MAKE PEOPLE
SAFER.
>> Jordan: I LIKE HOW YOU SAY
THAT.
IF INDIANA CAN DO IT, WE CAN DO
IT.
>> Gov. Whitmer: [LAUGHS]
RIGHT?
>> Jordan: ABORTION IS USUALLY
A TOPIC DEMOCRATS RUN FROM, OR
AT LEAST MAKE A CENTERPIECE OF
THEIR CAMPAIGNS.
YOU DID.
AND YOU HAVE TAKEN BOLD ACTION
ON THAT.
IS THAT A RECIPE FOR NATIONAL
ELECTIONS?
>> Gov. Whitmer: THE MIDWEST
IS A GREAT PLACE TO SEE THAT YOU
CAN WIN ON ABORTION.
PEOPLE EXPECT TO HAVE THESE
RIGHTS.
WE HAD THEM FOR 50 YEARS.
WE MAKE OUR OWN DECISIONS ABOUT
OUR BODIES AND OUR FUTURE IS.
>> Jordan: YOU REPEALED A 1931
ABORTION LAW.
ARE THERE ANY OTHER LAWS ON THE
BOOKS FROM BACK THEN THAT ARE
WORTH LOOKING BACK INTO?
>> Gov. Whitmer: OH, YEAH.
WE'VE GOT A LOT OF ZOMBIES.
>> Jordan: THEY ARE IN THERE.
>> Gov. Whitmer: ZOMBIE
KILLER.
>> Jordan: DEATH PENALTY FOR
SWING DANCING, IS THAT IN THERE?
SPRINGER MICHIGAN MEANS POTHOLES
ARE EVERYWHERE IN THE GOVERNOR
HAS INVESTED BILLIONS IN
INFRASTRUCTURE AS PART OF HER
PROMISE TO FIX THE DAMN ROADS.
OR SOMEONE WHO BLEW A FEW TIRES
HERE IN MY HIGH SCHOOL DAYS, I
KNEW IT WAS MY DUTY TO HELP.
>> Gov. Whitmer: I AM WITH THE
MEN AND WOMEN TO HELP AND SO
DOES JORDAN.
>> Jordan: OKAY, ALL RIGHT.
>> Gov. Whitmer: ALL RIGHT,
READY TO DO SOME WORK?
GOT TO PUT YOUR SHOES ON.
>> Jordan: DRESS FOR THE JOB
YOU WANT AND FOR ME, I WOULD
LIKE TO BE FOREMAN OR WHATEVER
THE CORPORATE PERSON IS IN THE
OFFICE.
>> LET ME PULL OUT MY WATCH.
WHAT TIME IS AT?
>> TIME TO FIX THE DAMN ROADS!
>> YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS?
>> Jordan: THIS IS --
>> THIS IS WHAT WE CALL A WORK
AROUND HERE.
SEE PUTTING A LITTLE WORK, I
KNOW YOU GOT NICE PANTS ON, SO
TRY NOT TO GET TOO MUCH WORK ON
YOU.
>> Jordan: OF THIS IS ACTUALLY
AN IMPEDIMENT, I CAN STAND AND
WATCH THE WORK.
>> DON'T DO THAT.
>> Jordan: FIXING POTHOLES,
AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, ESTABLISH
THAT MY HOME STATE IS DEFINITELY
NOT FLORIDA.
>> Gov. Whitmer: OTHER STATES
ARE WAGING WARS AGAINST
DIFFERENT PARTS OF THEIR
POPULATION.
I THINK A LOT OF POLITICIANS
JUST WANT TO PICK FIGHTS OR GOOD
HEADLINES, WHETHER IT IS PICKING
A FIGHT WITH MICKEY MOUSE, OR
MOVING BACKWARDS TO THE EARLY
1900s, IT IS SO MUCH EASIER TO
SHOW UP AND TO LISTEN TO PEOPLE
ON WHAT REALLY MATTERS.
SO WE ARE TRYING TO MAKE
MICHIGAN A PLACE WHERE EVERY
BUSINESS CAN THRIVE AND EVERY
PERSON HAS RIGHTS AND FREEDOMS
TO MAKE THEIR OWN DECISIONS, AND
TO LIVE THE LIFE THEY WANT AND
BE SUCCESSFUL.
>> Jordan: YOU ARE PROGRESSIVE
ON GUNS COME ON ABORTION RIGHTS.
IT FEELS LIKE THE MICHIGAN HAND
IS A WELCOMING HAND.
>> Gov. Whitmer: IT IS.
IT IS FREEDOM.
>> Jordan: MICHIGAN IS A HAND,
WHAT IS FLORIDA?
IT LOOKS LIKE A --
>> Gov. Whitmer: TRYING NOT TO
GO THERE.
[LAUGHTER]
>> Jordan: JUST SAYING.
IT IS ONE, THAT IS THE
DEMOCRACY.
AT TIMES.
>> Gov. Whitmer: YOUR WORDS.
[LAUGHTER]
>> Jordan: FAIR.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> Jordan: THANK YOU.
STAY TUNED, BECAUSE WHEN WE COME
BACK, MICHAEL SHANNON WILL BE
JOINING ME ON THE SHOW.
DON'T GO AWAY.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> Jordan: WELCOME BACK TO
"THE DAILY SHOW."
MY GUEST TONIGHT IS AN
ACADEMY AWARD NOMINATED ACTOR
WHO CAN CURRENTLY BE SEEN IN THE
SHOWTIME SERIES,
"WACO: THE AFTERMATH."
>> THIS THING WAS PUBLISHED
ALMOST 20 YEARS AGO.
SO HOW IS IT SUDDENLY AN
EMERGENCY?
>> BECAUSE I BELIEVE THAT THESE
GROUPS ARE USING THIS BOOK TO
HELP COORDINATE THEIR EFFORTS.
THESE MILITIAS, THEY USED TO BE
SEPARATE.
LITTLE POCKETS HERE AND THERE,
WE COULD DEAL WITH THEM.
BUT NOW, WACO HAS DONE SOMETHING
TO THEM.
IT HAS UNITED THEM.
AND THEY ARE STARTING TO LOOK
MORE LIKE A FOREIGN TERRORIST
NETWORK THAN ANYTHING WE'VE EVER
SEEN IN THE U.S. BEFORE.
>> Jordan: PLEASE WELCOME
MICHAEL SHANNON!
♪
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> THIS IS EXCITING.
>> Jordan: MICHAEL, WELCOME TO
THE SHOW.
>> THANKS FOR HAVING ME.
>> Jordan: THE SERIES, TODAY
IS A 30TH ANNIVERSARY OF THE
WACO SIEGE.
AND I KNOW THIS SERIES, YOU DID
A SERIES THAT LOOKED AT THE WACO
SIEGE, AND NOW THIS IS
REVISITING IT.
IT IS THE AFTERMATH.
WHAT IS IT ABOUT WACO THAT MADE
YOU WANT TO RETURN TO THE STORY?
>> YEAH, I MEAN, A LOT OF
PEOPLE, WHEN I TOLD THEM I WAS
MAKING A SEQUEL FOR WACO, THEY
SAID, DIDN'T YOU DO IT ALL?
AND GRANTED, THAT WAS THE EVENT,
BUT OBVIOUSLY, AN EVENT LIKE
THAT IS LIKE A METEOR CRASHING
INTO THE EARTH, YOU KNOW?
IT IS GOING TO HAVE SEISMIC
CONSEQUENCES, AND I REALLY THINK
IT IS WORTH EXPLORING THESE
INCIDENTS, THEY DON'T JUST EXIST
IN A VACUUM.
AND EVERYTHING IS CONNECTED AND
EVERYTHING LEADS TO THE NEXT
THING, AND THAT IS WHAT WAS SO
WORTHWHILE TO EXPLORE.
>> Jordan: YEAH, I MEAN, YOU
LOOK AT WACO, IT IS IN MANY
WAYS, IF NOT THE BIRTH OF THE
MODERN MILITIA MOVEMENT,
DEFINITELY PART OF THE
INTRODUCTORY FOR IT.
>> YEAH.
AND JUST SEWING THIS DISTRUST
AND THEN GOVERNMENT.
A LOT OF TIMES, WHEN I THINK
ABOUT ANARCHY, I THINK, WHAT IS
IT THAT REALLY FRIGHTENS PEOPLE
ABOUT ANARCHY?
WHAT IS THE THING THAT YOU WOULD
LOSE IN A STATE OF ANARCHY THAT
IS SO SIGNIFICANT?
AND THE ANSWER TO THAT, I KEEP
COMING UP WITH IS, WELL, THE
GOVERNMENT KEEPS YOU SAFE.
THE GOVERNMENT EXISTS IN ORDER
TO KEEP THE POPULATION SAFE,
TAKEN CARE OF, AND IF THE
GOVERNMENT ISN'T DOING THAT, IT
IS REALLY KIND OF WORTHLESS.
LIKE, THERE IS NO REASON FOR IT
TO EXIST.
AND IT DOES THAT IN A VARIETY OF
WAYS, WHETHER IT IS THE MOST
OBVIOUS WAY IS JUST KEEPING US
SAFE FROM HARM, BUT ALSO HELPING
US TO TAKE CARE OF OURSELVES AND
BE ABLE TO TAKE CARE OF
OURSELVES AND LIVE SOMEWHERE
WHERE WE DON'T HAVE TO WORRY
ABOUT OUR OWN WELL-BEING ALL THE
TIME.
LIKE, THAT IS, AS FAR AS I CAN
TELL, WHY IT IS THERE.
[APPLAUSE]
>> Jordan: YEAH.
I THINK IN AN IDEAL SENSE, YES.
I SPEND A LOT OF TIME ON THE
ROAD, I TALKED TO A LOT OF FOLKS
WHO HAVE THIS INHERENT DISTRUST
IN THE GOVERNMENT.
THEY DON'T SEE IT AS SOMETHING
THAT SERVES A ROLE TO SUPPORT
AND TO PROTECT.
IT IS SOMETHING YOU SHOULD
SHOULD BE DISTRUSTFUL OF.
WACO IS AN EXPERIENCE THAT WAS
COMPLICATED FOR A LOT OF FOLKS.
THE GOVERNMENT DIDN'T HANDLE IT
PERHAPS THE WAY THEY COULD HAVE
OR SHOULD HAVE.
YOU EVEN MAKE THIS SERIES AT A
TIME THAT WAS.
WHAT HAPPENED ON JANUARY 6.
THE SERIES ORIGINALLY LOOKS AT
THE EXTREMISM, AND SINCE THEN,
WE HAVE SEEN WHAT IS EXTREMISM
IN A SERIES LIKE THAT NOW MAKE
ITS WAY ONTO THE FRONT PAGES
COME ONTO THE STEPS OF THE
CAPITOL, JANUARY 6 HAS NOW HAPPENED.
HOW DOES THAT AFFECT APPROACHING
TELLING THE STORY?
>> WELL, JEEZ, IT JUST MAKES ME
WONDER, LIKE, BECAUSE THINGS
KEEP HAPPENING THAT YOU THINK,
THERE IS NO WAY THIS COULD EVER
HAPPEN.
AND THEN IT HAPPENS.
AND SO I AM LIKE, WELL, WHAT IS
THE NEXT -- WHAT'S THE NEXT
THING AFTER JANUARY 6?
AND WHAT IS FASCINATING IS, THE
FELLOW I AM PLAYING, WHO IS AN
ACTUAL REAL PERSON, HAS AN
INCREDIBLE BOOK.
I HIGHLY RECOMMEND EVERYBODY
READ IT, CALLED "STALLING FOR
TIME.
BUT WACO IS ONE CHAPTER IN HIS
BOOK.
LIKE I SAID, AS CATACLYSMIC AS
IT WAS, IT IS ONLY -- HE'S GOT
ALL OF THESE INCIDENTS THAT HE
HAS DEALT WITH OVER THE YEARS,
ON A MICRO AND MACRO LEVELS.
AND HE IS VERY RELUCTANT.
HE IS NOT -- HE'S NOT LOOKING TO
VILIFY ANYBODY OR SAY, OH, AND
HE WOULD AGREE THAT THAT
SITUATION IN WACO WAS AN
INCREDIBLY COMPLICATED
SITUATION.
AND HE HAS DOUBTS HIMSELF ABOUT
HOW HE HANDLED IT AND CERTAINLY
HAS DOUBTS ABOUT HOW OTHER
PEOPLE HANDLE THAT.
BUT HE DOESN'T THINK THERE IS A
BIG, BAD WOLF OR ANYTHING LIKE
THAT.
BUT I THINK IT JUST -- IT'S
EXTRAORDINARILY COMPELLING, I
THINK, THIS STORY.
AND I THINK IT'S EXTRAORDINARILY
VALUABLE TO REALIZE THAT NO
MATTER HOW OUTLANDISH AN EVENT
IS, THAT THERE IS SOMETHING EVEN
MORE OUTLANDISH JUST AROUND THE
CORNER.
AND I THINK THAT THAT IS WHY THE
STORY IS WORTH KEEPING IN THE
FOREFRONT OF OUR MINDS.
>> Jordan: YOU WERE TELLING
THAT BECAUSE YOU ARE A
STORYTELLER AND YOU ARE LIKE,
NEXT SEASON -- YOU GOT TWO
SERIES OUT OF IT.
"YOU THINK YOU HAVE SEEN THIS SO
FAR, THE AFTER AFTER PART, ARE
YOU PITCHING IT NOW?
>> [LAUGHS]
THERE ARE ACTUALLY -- GARY AND
I -- BECAUSE GARY AND I ACTUALLY
HAVE BECOME VERY GOOD FRIENDS.
>> Jordan: YOU BOUGHT THE IP.
I SEE.
>> GARY, I THINK IT IS IMPORTANT
TO POINT OUT THAT I AM
ABSOLUTELY NOTHING LIKE GARY.
I DON'T LOOK LIKE GARY, I DON'T
SOUND LIKE GARY.
>> Jordan: YOU ARE THE SECOND,
THIRD, FOURTH CHOICE?
>> YEAH, YEAH.
IT WAS DANNY DeVITO, FISHER
STEVENS, AND THEN BE.
>> Jordan: --
>> I AM LIKE A CATCH BASICALLY,
I GET WHEN NO ONE ELSE WANTS.
BUT HE IS LIKE, WE'VE GOT TO
MAKE ALL THE CHAPTERS.
THERE IS A POTENTIAL THIRD
SEASON.
IF YOU READ THE BOOK, YOU'LL
FIGURE IT OUT.
BUT ANYWAY, THE ONLY OTHER POINT
I WANT TO MAKE -- I HAVE HEARD
OTHER PEOPLE, FRIENDS OF MINE,
SAY THIS, PARTICULARLY THE
BROTHERS WHO MADE THE SHOW WHO
ARE JUST JOHN ANDREW, ARE JUST
BEAUTIFUL, BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE, AND
THEY REALLY, REALLY CARE.
IT IS NOT EASY TO MAKE A SHOW
LIKE THIS.
THERE IS GOING TO BE A LOT OF
RESISTANCE.
LIKE, REALLY, THIS IS KIND OF A
DRAG.
YEAH, WE NEED TO DO THIS.
>> Jordan: IS IT BECAUSE IT'S
AN INHERENTLY POLITICAL STORY?
>> YEAH, THAT'S PART OF IT.
IT'S ALSO UNPLEASANT.
IT IS PRETTY DARN UNPLEASANT.
IT IS TEXAS.
BUT I THINK ONE OF THE THINGS
THAT IS VALUABLE ALSO ABOUT IT
IS THAT IT PROVES THAT NO MATTER
WHAT SIDE OF THIS DEBATE OR
ISSUE THAT YOU ARE ON, EVERYONE
IS CAPABLE OF HAVING A FLAWED
PERSPECTIVE.
EVERYONE IS.
AND THAT IS ALSO IMPORTANT THING
TO REMEMBER, AND A LOT OF PEOPLE
PAID LIP SERVICE TO THAT.
IT'S LIKE, IT'S NOT UNTIL WE
REACH ACROSS THE AISLE,
WHATEVER, FIND COMMON GROUND,
BUT I THINK IT IS REALLY
INTERESTING IN THIS SITUATION,
THE STORY, TO SEE HOW THAT
REALLY IS NOT EASY TO DO FOR
EITHER SIDE.
AND HOW COMPLICATED THAT TRULY
CAN BE IN PRACTICE, NOT JUST AS,
LIKE, A CATCHY SLOGAN, SOMETHING
THAT YOU ACTUALLY DO.
>> Jordan: YEAH, IT IS
VULNERABLE TO SUCCEED ANY KIND
OF GROUND.
ADMITTING THAT YOUR POINT OF
VIEW MIGHT BE FLAWED COULD PUT
YOU IN A POSITION WHERE YOU
SUDDENLY NOW LOSE GROUND TO THIS
OTHER SIDE.
I FEEL LIKE WE ARE CONSTANTLY
FIGHTING THOSE BATTLES TODAY.
>> AND PARTICULARLY WHEN THEY
ARE ACTUALLY LIVES ON THE LINE.
LIKE, IT IS NOT JUST
THANKSGIVING AND YOU ARE
THROWING TO SWEET POTATOES AT
YOUR UNCLE.
THERE ARE PEOPLE IN VERY
LIFE-AND-DEATH SITUATIONS, AND
DECISIONS HAS TO GET MADE VERY
QUICKLY.
>> Jordan: NOW SWITCHING GEARS
A LITTLE BIT HERE, I AM FROM
CHICAGO.
I KNOW YOUR REPUTATION, I SAW
YOU IN CHICAGO PERFORM, NOT ONLY
ARE YOU WONDERFUL ON THE BIG
SCREEN, BUT ALSO LIVE IN
THEATER.
I KNOW NOT ONLY DO YOU DO LIVE
THEATER.
I KNOW YOU ALSO PERFORM MUSIC.
YOU COVER HISTORIC BANDS, AND
THEY ARE HISTORIC ALBUMS.
I KNOW YOU ALSO DO IMPROV.
IS THERE --
WHAT?
[LAUGHTER]
YEAH.
IT IS LIKE "WHOSE LINE IS IT
ANYWAY" TYPE SITUATION, A LOT OF
PROPS -- I'M KIDDING.
I WOULD NOT --
>> IT IS FUNNY TO SEE A GROWN
MAN WITH A PACIFIER.
[LAUGHTER]
>> Jordan: ARE YOU DRAWN TO
THAT TYPE OF THING?
I FEEL LIKE YOU ARE KNOWN MORE
FOR YOUR HEAVIER, MORE DRAMATIC
PERFORMANCES.
DO YOU SORT OF HAVE TO INDULGE
THE OTHER SIDE?
>> OH, G.
I DON'T KNOW.
I FEEL LIKE I DON'T DO ENOUGH.
THERE IS THINGS, I SHOULD TRY
OTHER THINGS AND KEEP
DIVERSIFYING MY PORTFOLIO AS IT
WERE.
BUT THEN I THINK, WELL, YOU HEAR
A LOT OF TIMES, JUST STAY IN
YOUR LANE.
WHETHER THAT IS WITH YOUR WORK
OR YOUR OPINIONS OR WHATEVER,
YOU KNOW, JUST STAY IN YOUR
LANE.
SO I'M KIND OF CONSCIOUS OF THAT
TOO.
LIKE, THE MUSIC STUFF, PEOPLE
ARE ALWAYS LIKABLE WHAT HAPPENED
TO YOUR BAND?
WHAT IS GOING ON WITH THAT?
I AM LIKE, IT JUST STARTED TO
FEEL -- I JUST STARTED TO FEEL
LIKE -- BECAUSE WHO WANTS --
ACTOR BRANDS, I AM EMBARRASSED
BY THEM.
AND I'M AN ACTOR.
SO I DON'T WANT --
[APPLAUSE]
TO PARTICIPATE IN THAT.
I REMEMBER -- I FREAKING LOVE
KEVIN BACON SO MUCH.
>> Jordan: [LAUGHS]
>> I REMEMBER SEEING THE BACON
BROTHERS ON JAY LENO.
I WAS LIKE --
>> Jordan: REMEMBER HEARING
JOE SCARBOROUGH TALK ABOUT HIS
BAND, GOD BLESS, GO WITH GOD,
JOE.
>> THERE ARE CERTAIN PEOPLE WHO
I WON'T MENTION WHO COME INTO
THE MAKEUP TRAILER IN THE
MORNING AND THEY SAY, "HEY, HAVE
YOU HEARD MY ALBUM?"
AND THEN THEY PUT IT ON WHILE
EVERYONE IS GETTING THEIR HAIR
DOWN AND MAKE US US INTO THE
RECORD.
>> Jordan: YOU HAVEN'T DONE
THAT?
>> I SAID I WASN'T GOING TO MIX
WITH THE BAD.
I DON'T WANT TO INCRIMINATE
MYSELF.
>> Jordan: TELL ME THERE HAS
BEEN A MOMENT WHEN YOU HAVE
LOCKED UP VERY SERIOUSLY AND ASK
SOMEBODY TO COME TO YOUR IMPROV
SHOW.
>> I HAVE NEVER -- NO.
WELL, I AM USUALLY WRITING
SOMEONE ELSE'S COAT TAILS.
AS YOU KNOW, I AM PERFORMING
OFTEN TIMES WITH TWO OF THE
LEGENDARY IMPROVISERS OF ALL
TIME.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> Jordan: THE GREATS OF ALL
TIME.
>> SO YOU BASICALLY JUST STAND
ON STAGE NEXT TO THEM AND DROOL
ON YOUR SHOES AND IT BE LIKE,
BRAVO.
NOBODY IS WATCHING YOU ANYWAY.
>> Jordan: YOU ARE NOT TRULY
AN IMPROVISER UNTIL YOU BEG
SOMEONE TO COME TO ONE OF YOUR
SHOWS.
>> THAT'S TRUE.
BECAUSE YOU DID THAT AT THE I
OWE.
>> Jordan: YEAH.
>> AND THEY WOULD HAVE 500 EUROS
A DAY.
ONE AFTER THE OTHER.
>> Jordan: DID YOU EVER COME
AND SEE ANY OF MY SHOWS?
>> NO.
>> Jordan: NOT INTERESTED?
I WAS AT SECOND CITY, WHICH WAS
LITERALLY TWO BLOCKS FROM YOUR
THEATER.
I'M SURE YOU CAME TO SEE SOME OF
THAT TOO?
>> IT'S A LITTLE CORPORATE,
ISN'T IT?
AM I IN TROUBLE?
>> Jordan: IT'S NOT CORPORATE,
IT'S JUST OWNED BY A VENTURE
CAPITALIST NOW.
SO EVENTS CORPORATIVE, MAY BE.
IT'S CORPORATE.
I AM GLAD YOU COULD COME ON HERE
TO HELP ME BURN DOWN ANY BRIDGES
I HAVE.
[LAUGHTER AND CHEERING]
MICHAEL --
>> EVERYONE'S FAVORITE ARSONIST.
>> Jordan: ON THE ANNIVERSARY
OF A SIEGE, YOU CAME HERE AND
YOU TOOK IT TO THE GROUND.
MICHAEL SHANNON, EVERYONE.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
"WACO: THE AFTERMATH" AIRS
FRIDAYS AND SUNDAYS ON SHOWTIME.
WE'LL TAKE A BREAK AND WE'LL BE
RIGHT BACK AFTER THIS.
♪
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> Jordan: THAT'S OUR SHOW FOR
TONIGHT, BUT BEFORE WE GO:
PLEASE CONSIDER DONATING TO THE
HUNTINGTON DISEASE SOCIETY OF
AMERICA.
A TERRIBLE DISEASE THAT HITS
CLOSE TO HOME TO ME.
PLEASE DONATE AT THE LINK BELOW.
HERE IT IS, YOUR
"MOMENT OF ZEN."
>> AND I HOPE THAT YOU ALWAYS
SUPPORT ME WITH HOW IMPORTANT
MILK AND THE MILK PRODUCTS ARE
TO THE PROGRAMS THAT YOU RUN.
SO JUST BEAR WITH ME A MOMENT