1
00:00:04,005 --> 00:00:05,337
Mary!
2
00:00:05,339 --> 00:00:06,738
Mary!
3
00:00:06,740 --> 00:00:08,607
Let me take your picture
with my cool new camera!
4
00:00:08,609 --> 00:00:09,608
Oh, no! Quit it!
5
00:00:09,610 --> 00:00:11,443
I always look terrible
in those pictures.
6
00:00:11,445 --> 00:00:13,111
But these are sticky!
7
00:00:14,415 --> 00:00:15,914
Dick, I'm trying
to work here.
8
00:00:15,916 --> 00:00:18,183
Why don't you take
your new toy outside?
9
00:00:18,185 --> 00:00:19,617
Because you're in here!
10
00:00:20,921 --> 00:00:24,456
Let's do the many moods
of Mary Albright.
11
00:00:24,458 --> 00:00:25,390
Angry.
12
00:00:27,394 --> 00:00:28,861
Angry.
13
00:00:30,764 --> 00:00:32,964
Okay. That's enough angry.
14
00:00:32,966 --> 00:00:35,167
Let's move on to impish.
15
00:00:35,169 --> 00:00:38,303
This is really annoying
because you're not
listening to me.
16
00:00:38,305 --> 00:00:40,138
But you're not
listening to me!
17
00:00:40,140 --> 00:00:41,373
Where's impish?
18
00:00:41,375 --> 00:00:42,640
You know what?
19
00:00:42,642 --> 00:00:44,843
We are about to get
into a huge fight.
20
00:00:44,845 --> 00:00:45,878
If that's the case,
21
00:00:45,880 --> 00:00:47,445
I better put in
a new role of film.
22
00:00:49,583 --> 00:00:51,717
I've got to get out of here.
23
00:00:51,719 --> 00:00:53,185
All right.
24
00:00:53,187 --> 00:00:54,520
So, are we on for tonight?
25
00:00:54,522 --> 00:00:56,455
No. Um...
26
00:00:56,457 --> 00:00:58,556
I--I think we should
just take the weekend off.
27
00:00:58,558 --> 00:01:00,692
What?
Yeah, yeah.
This'll be great.
28
00:01:00,694 --> 00:01:02,728
Um, let's just talk
in a couple of days,
29
00:01:02,730 --> 00:01:04,596
and I'll have
some time to myself,
30
00:01:04,598 --> 00:01:06,465
and you'll have some time
to break your new camera.
31
00:01:06,467 --> 00:01:08,399
Mary...
32
00:01:09,870 --> 00:01:12,070
Nina!
33
00:01:12,072 --> 00:01:13,505
Did you hear
any of that?
34
00:01:13,507 --> 00:01:14,739
Unfortunately, yes.
35
00:01:14,741 --> 00:01:17,442
I couldn't find
my Walkman in time.
36
00:01:17,444 --> 00:01:20,879
So, is this the beginning
of the end for me and Mary?
37
00:01:20,881 --> 00:01:23,648
No.
No, not at all.
38
00:01:23,650 --> 00:01:26,451
Taking time apart is
what healthy couples do.
39
00:01:26,453 --> 00:01:27,585
That's why you two
have never done it.
40
00:01:29,456 --> 00:01:30,923
[mumbles]
But, Nina!
41
00:01:30,925 --> 00:01:32,857
♪♪ [theme]
42
00:02:09,096 --> 00:02:10,762
So, Dick, what are
you and Albright
doin' tonight?
43
00:02:10,764 --> 00:02:12,430
What all healthy couples
are doing.
44
00:02:12,432 --> 00:02:14,399
Spending time apart.
45
00:02:16,069 --> 00:02:18,069
Harry!
You're soaking!
46
00:02:18,071 --> 00:02:20,472
I went for a walk and
got caught in the rain,
47
00:02:20,474 --> 00:02:23,208
and so I called 911.
48
00:02:23,210 --> 00:02:25,077
Don gave me a ride home.
49
00:02:25,079 --> 00:02:27,779
I was glad to do it,
but when I file my paperwork,
50
00:02:27,781 --> 00:02:30,849
you're a runaway girl
who turned her life around
51
00:02:30,851 --> 00:02:33,818
after some straight talk
from a caring cop.
52
00:02:35,288 --> 00:02:38,389
That's actually closer
than you might think.
53
00:02:38,391 --> 00:02:39,524
Well, see you later,
Sally.
54
00:02:39,526 --> 00:02:40,725
Bye, hon.
55
00:02:40,727 --> 00:02:42,027
Harry!
56
00:02:43,296 --> 00:02:47,465
You went walking in the rain
in my new suede jacket?
57
00:02:47,467 --> 00:02:50,302
Well, the guy
on Channel 10 said it
was gonna be sunny,
58
00:02:50,304 --> 00:02:53,905
and I'm experimenting
with the buttons
on the other side.
59
00:02:53,907 --> 00:02:55,173
You jackass!
60
00:02:55,175 --> 00:02:58,610
Those idiots on TV
can't predict the weather!
61
00:02:58,612 --> 00:03:02,080
But they are very good
with the lotto numbers.
62
00:03:02,082 --> 00:03:06,385
Dick, this coat
cost me 400 bucks.
63
00:03:06,387 --> 00:03:08,520
We're goin' down there.
Someone's payin' for it.
64
00:03:08,522 --> 00:03:11,189
Well, if you can that,
then I'll go halvsies
on your new blouse,
65
00:03:11,191 --> 00:03:13,992
'cause that ran
like a son of a gun.
66
00:03:21,902 --> 00:03:23,268
Wow!
67
00:03:23,270 --> 00:03:25,537
The Channel 10
news set.
68
00:03:25,539 --> 00:03:28,073
This is almost
like bein' there.
69
00:03:28,075 --> 00:03:30,541
Harry, we are there.
70
00:03:30,543 --> 00:03:32,878
Well, in that case,
I'm a little
disappointed .
71
00:03:32,880 --> 00:03:35,347
What can we do
for you folks?
72
00:03:35,349 --> 00:03:37,316
Are you the idiot
who does the weather?
73
00:03:37,318 --> 00:03:40,485
No. He's the idiot
who does the news.
74
00:03:40,487 --> 00:03:42,820
Wait a second.
I know you.
75
00:03:42,822 --> 00:03:44,256
You're, uh...you're...
76
00:03:44,258 --> 00:03:46,691
I'm Chaz Montana.
77
00:03:48,762 --> 00:03:51,229
No, that's not it.
78
00:03:51,231 --> 00:03:52,764
Give me a minute.
79
00:03:52,766 --> 00:03:55,300
Chaz Montana?
That's your real name?
80
00:03:56,369 --> 00:03:57,435
Yes.
81
00:03:57,437 --> 00:03:58,437
Okay.
82
00:03:58,439 --> 00:04:00,305
Look, Montana,
83
00:04:00,307 --> 00:04:02,341
you dopes predicted
clear skies,
84
00:04:02,343 --> 00:04:04,375
and my brother here got
caught in a downpour.
85
00:04:04,377 --> 00:04:06,978
Hey! Were you
in Flashdance?
86
00:04:06,980 --> 00:04:08,946
Whatever.
87
00:04:08,948 --> 00:04:10,648
Look, your
stupid forecast
88
00:04:10,650 --> 00:04:13,084
ruined the best jacket
I ever owned!
89
00:04:13,086 --> 00:04:15,186
Miss, we don't have
a big weather budget
90
00:04:15,188 --> 00:04:16,554
like the other
stations.
91
00:04:16,556 --> 00:04:18,023
We just pull
our forecasts off
the internet.
92
00:04:18,025 --> 00:04:19,657
It's really cool.
You just type in
your zip code--
93
00:04:19,659 --> 00:04:21,393
Save it!
Right.
94
00:04:22,662 --> 00:04:24,062
Look at that
satellite photo.
95
00:04:24,064 --> 00:04:26,297
Any idiot knows that
an occluded front
96
00:04:26,299 --> 00:04:27,599
hovering over
the Twin Counties
97
00:04:27,601 --> 00:04:29,167
will not generate
precipitation,
98
00:04:29,169 --> 00:04:30,902
provided that
the dew point doesn't spike.
99
00:04:30,904 --> 00:04:32,604
But look,
it's spiking.
100
00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:35,373
How do you know that?
101
00:04:35,375 --> 00:04:36,674
Oh, I'm trained
to know that.
102
00:04:36,676 --> 00:04:38,042
You can jeopardize
your own security
103
00:04:38,044 --> 00:04:41,579
by not being constantly aware
of atmospheric conditions.
104
00:04:42,783 --> 00:04:45,050
I totally agree.
105
00:04:45,052 --> 00:04:47,419
No, not Flashdance.
106
00:04:47,421 --> 00:04:49,821
You were on the new Fame!
107
00:04:51,291 --> 00:04:53,925
All right, boys, here is how
it's gonna go down, all right?
108
00:04:53,927 --> 00:04:56,795
Either I get paid in full
for my jacket,
109
00:04:56,797 --> 00:04:59,531
or I am walking out of here
with that Action News desk.
110
00:04:59,533 --> 00:05:01,699
I got a better idea.
111
00:05:01,701 --> 00:05:04,336
You got more knowledge
and training than
anyone we have.
112
00:05:04,338 --> 00:05:07,038
How would you like to be
our new weather girl?
113
00:05:08,308 --> 00:05:09,240
Me?
114
00:05:11,578 --> 00:05:14,146
On TV?
Mm-hmm.
115
00:05:14,148 --> 00:05:16,148
Okay.
116
00:05:20,787 --> 00:05:22,621
Oh, Dick!
I got a job!
117
00:05:22,623 --> 00:05:24,656
I'm the new weather girl
down at Channel 10!
118
00:05:24,658 --> 00:05:25,891
Isn't that cool?
119
00:05:25,893 --> 00:05:27,759
Yeah. And I've got some
news for you, too.
120
00:05:27,761 --> 00:05:31,363
This is guy night.
So, ciao, chickie.
121
00:05:31,365 --> 00:05:33,065
Thanks for your support.
122
00:05:33,067 --> 00:05:35,033
Harry!
123
00:05:35,035 --> 00:05:37,001
Come on in here,
will ya?
124
00:05:39,073 --> 00:05:41,406
Harry, this time
apart from Mary
125
00:05:41,408 --> 00:05:43,508
is a great opportunity
to hang out with you,
126
00:05:43,510 --> 00:05:45,110
like we used to.
127
00:05:45,112 --> 00:05:46,244
I don't remember that.
128
00:05:46,246 --> 00:05:48,080
Yeah...
129
00:05:48,082 --> 00:05:49,481
that's how much
fun we had.
130
00:05:49,483 --> 00:05:51,282
Oh. Well, should I
go get some beers?
131
00:05:51,284 --> 00:05:53,618
Ah, ah, ah, ah.
No need.
132
00:05:53,620 --> 00:05:56,988
I've got a whole pitcher
of mai tais...
133
00:05:56,990 --> 00:05:58,656
right here!
134
00:05:58,658 --> 00:05:59,724
Mary's favorite.
135
00:05:59,726 --> 00:06:02,527
Look. I've even
got parasols.
136
00:06:02,529 --> 00:06:04,762
There you go!
137
00:06:04,764 --> 00:06:06,732
This is so cool.
138
00:06:06,734 --> 00:06:08,533
With Mary, it's all
about candlelight.
139
00:06:08,535 --> 00:06:10,301
But not for us guys.
140
00:06:10,303 --> 00:06:11,969
That's why I got
paper lanterns.
141
00:06:16,109 --> 00:06:18,043
You know, I'm good
with the overheads.
142
00:06:18,045 --> 00:06:19,644
Harry...
143
00:06:19,646 --> 00:06:21,145
do you love jazz?
144
00:06:21,147 --> 00:06:24,182
Uh--
Soft, smooth guy jazz?
145
00:06:25,619 --> 00:06:27,418
Sit. Sit.
♪♪ [soft jazz]
146
00:06:27,420 --> 00:06:29,387
No, no, no, no!
On the floor.
147
00:06:29,389 --> 00:06:30,421
Here.
148
00:06:30,423 --> 00:06:32,090
Under the quilt.
149
00:06:34,227 --> 00:06:36,194
Down the hatch, dude!
150
00:06:46,172 --> 00:06:48,740
This feels so right.
151
00:06:48,742 --> 00:06:49,841
You know...
152
00:06:49,843 --> 00:06:50,942
I'm startin'
to think that...
153
00:06:50,944 --> 00:06:53,712
maybe we need
a couple of days apart.
154
00:06:53,714 --> 00:06:55,246
No!
Yeah!
155
00:06:55,248 --> 00:06:57,048
Hey, why don't you go
play with your camera?
156
00:06:58,785 --> 00:07:00,885
I already broke it.
157
00:07:05,726 --> 00:07:07,225
Sally?
158
00:07:07,227 --> 00:07:10,061
There's the teeniest
of warming trends
on its way.
159
00:07:10,063 --> 00:07:13,131
But is it time to
break out our cocoa
butter and Espadrilles?
160
00:07:13,133 --> 00:07:16,835
Only I know for sure,
because I'm Sally Storm.
161
00:07:16,837 --> 00:07:18,703
And we're clear.
[bell rings]
162
00:07:18,705 --> 00:07:20,438
That was great!
163
00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:22,707
Now, the key to
drawing in an audience
164
00:07:22,709 --> 00:07:25,543
is for you and Chaz to have
that witty on-air banter.
165
00:07:25,545 --> 00:07:27,145
But it's gotta be genuine.
The folks at home love it
166
00:07:27,147 --> 00:07:28,212
if you and I are
really good buddies.
167
00:07:28,214 --> 00:07:31,283
Okay. Genuine
buddy banter comin' up.
168
00:07:31,285 --> 00:07:34,986
In 5, 4, 3, 2...
169
00:07:34,988 --> 00:07:37,221
Here's Sally
with the forecast.
170
00:07:37,223 --> 00:07:39,958
Thanks, Chazbo.
Well, tomorrow,
171
00:07:39,960 --> 00:07:42,360
the temperatures
will be in the low 50s,
172
00:07:42,362 --> 00:07:44,562
and we'll be goin'
from freezy to breezy
173
00:07:44,564 --> 00:07:47,531
as this shift
will bring about
a slight bit of wind
174
00:07:47,533 --> 00:07:49,768
to the southwest
quadrant of Rutherford.
175
00:07:49,770 --> 00:07:52,937
Actually, Chaz, it'll be
more like a zephyr.
176
00:07:52,939 --> 00:07:55,106
Wow. So a little windy,
huh, Sal?
177
00:07:55,108 --> 00:07:57,208
Oh, very windy, Chaz.
178
00:07:57,210 --> 00:07:59,277
So you'd better double-up
on that glue you use
179
00:07:59,279 --> 00:08:00,611
to hold your wig in place.
180
00:08:04,050 --> 00:08:05,550
No...no it isn't.
181
00:08:08,655 --> 00:08:10,722
[telephone rings]
182
00:08:13,593 --> 00:08:14,626
Hello?
183
00:08:14,628 --> 00:08:16,528
Hello? Did you call?
184
00:08:16,530 --> 00:08:17,762
Because I was
in the shower.
185
00:08:17,764 --> 00:08:19,864
I don't have a thing on.
186
00:08:23,070 --> 00:08:24,101
I didn't call.
187
00:08:24,103 --> 00:08:27,338
Are you sure?
Because the phone rang.
188
00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:28,673
How are you?
189
00:08:28,675 --> 00:08:30,074
Dick!
190
00:08:30,076 --> 00:08:31,610
[sing-songing]
Whatcha doin'?
191
00:08:32,880 --> 00:08:34,779
I'm watching a film.
192
00:08:34,781 --> 00:08:37,282
Oh! Is it a film
that we saw together
193
00:08:37,284 --> 00:08:39,618
and you're watching it
because it reminds
you of me?
194
00:08:39,620 --> 00:08:43,688
If you must know,
it's Deuce Bigalow:
Male Gigolo.
195
00:08:46,993 --> 00:08:48,259
I'm hanging up now.
196
00:08:48,261 --> 00:08:51,028
No. No, no. Mary, wait.
197
00:08:51,030 --> 00:08:54,365
There's...there's something
I have to ask you.
198
00:08:54,367 --> 00:08:55,566
Well, quickly!
199
00:08:55,568 --> 00:08:57,201
[sing-songing]
Whatcha doin'?
200
00:09:00,106 --> 00:09:01,405
[sighs]
201
00:09:05,378 --> 00:09:07,144
[sighs]
If only she looked at me
202
00:09:07,146 --> 00:09:10,615
the way she looked at
Deuce Bigalow, male gigolo.
203
00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:18,356
[Sally, on TV]
Welcome back.
204
00:09:18,358 --> 00:09:21,860
I'm Sally Storm,
and this is the
AccuWeather forecast.
205
00:09:21,862 --> 00:09:23,427
Sally! Lookin' good!
206
00:09:23,429 --> 00:09:26,230
So, Mr. Happy Sun will
hit like a lead pipe
207
00:09:26,232 --> 00:09:28,532
on the soft cartilage
of Rutherford's nose
208
00:09:28,534 --> 00:09:31,135
creating a 2.5
mile-per-hour breeze
209
00:09:31,137 --> 00:09:32,770
that'll travel
down Elm Street,
210
00:09:32,772 --> 00:09:35,139
bank off City Hall,
and dissipate into the park.
211
00:09:35,141 --> 00:09:36,741
Wait a minute.
212
00:09:36,743 --> 00:09:38,676
[Chaz] Are you sure you wanna
be that specific, Sally?
213
00:09:38,678 --> 00:09:40,611
Well, was I right
today, Chaz?
214
00:09:40,613 --> 00:09:43,348
Well, yes.
You're always right,
every forecast.
215
00:09:43,350 --> 00:09:45,483
No!
216
00:09:45,485 --> 00:09:47,385
I've never seen anyone predict
the weather so accurately.
217
00:09:47,387 --> 00:09:50,454
And I've never seen
a grown man throw up
to keep his weight down,
218
00:09:50,456 --> 00:09:53,391
but it seems to be
workin' for you, Chaz.
219
00:09:54,795 --> 00:09:56,394
[telephone rings]
220
00:09:59,566 --> 00:10:00,565
Hello?
221
00:10:00,567 --> 00:10:01,499
Hello, Mary?
222
00:10:02,769 --> 00:10:04,101
[sing-songing]
Whatcha doin'?
223
00:10:10,143 --> 00:10:12,243
Sally.
Hey.
224
00:10:12,245 --> 00:10:14,812
I saw your broadcast.
We have to talk.
225
00:10:14,814 --> 00:10:17,648
Oh, I can't. I got to get
these charts together
for tomorrow night.
226
00:10:17,650 --> 00:10:18,783
Sally, it's over.
227
00:10:18,785 --> 00:10:20,351
What? Why?
228
00:10:20,353 --> 00:10:21,920
You're too accurate.
229
00:10:21,922 --> 00:10:23,455
They're gonna be
onto us.
230
00:10:23,457 --> 00:10:25,022
Dick, I cannot quit.
231
00:10:25,024 --> 00:10:28,459
I have what we,
in this business,
call "heat."
232
00:10:28,461 --> 00:10:33,098
You'll feel heat when
you're under the FBI's
giant magnifying glass.
233
00:10:33,100 --> 00:10:35,533
That's right.
They have one.
234
00:10:37,004 --> 00:10:39,537
You're just jealous
'cause you've never been on TV.
235
00:10:39,539 --> 00:10:40,972
Sally, maybe you've
forgotten about
236
00:10:40,974 --> 00:10:43,775
The Dick Solomon
Goodtime Hour.
237
00:10:43,777 --> 00:10:45,877
I have work to do, okay?
238
00:10:45,879 --> 00:10:47,479
Sally, you will not--
Oh, my God.
239
00:10:47,481 --> 00:10:49,781
What?
Look at this.
240
00:10:49,783 --> 00:10:51,182
When this moist Gulf air
241
00:10:51,184 --> 00:10:53,150
collides with this
Canadian cold front
242
00:10:53,152 --> 00:10:54,952
and this Alberta clipper
has her way,
243
00:10:54,954 --> 00:10:57,822
a series of tornadoes
will level...
244
00:10:57,824 --> 00:10:59,123
all of Rutherford.
245
00:10:59,125 --> 00:11:00,124
Ouch.
246
00:11:00,126 --> 00:11:01,559
I gotta warn 'em.
247
00:11:01,561 --> 00:11:04,796
No, you are
a security officer first
and a weather girl second!
248
00:11:04,798 --> 00:11:06,564
You cannot compromise
this mission!
249
00:11:06,566 --> 00:11:08,399
No one else can predict
these tornadoes.
250
00:11:08,401 --> 00:11:10,001
The other stations will
get it all wrong.
251
00:11:10,003 --> 00:11:12,470
That's because the aliens
who work on those stations
252
00:11:12,472 --> 00:11:14,739
are keeping
their mouths shut!
253
00:11:17,210 --> 00:11:18,843
Dick, listen to me.
254
00:11:18,845 --> 00:11:20,978
At 9:05 tomorrow night,
255
00:11:20,980 --> 00:11:23,047
there will be
a catastrophic
weather event,
256
00:11:23,049 --> 00:11:24,482
and people
will get hurt.
257
00:11:24,484 --> 00:11:27,852
You know we are forbidden
to change the course
of human events.
258
00:11:27,854 --> 00:11:29,487
Now, you will stand
in front of those cameras,
259
00:11:29,489 --> 00:11:30,755
smile your biggest smile,
260
00:11:30,757 --> 00:11:33,590
and predict sunny skies
and mild temperatures.
261
00:11:33,592 --> 00:11:35,359
Are you asking me
to take a dive?
262
00:11:35,361 --> 00:11:37,161
I'm not asking, Lieutenant,
I'm telling.
263
00:11:37,163 --> 00:11:38,195
It's an order.
264
00:11:45,438 --> 00:11:47,538
Okay, now that that's over,
can we talk about Mary?
265
00:11:47,540 --> 00:11:49,708
'Cause I'm feeling
kind of blue.
266
00:11:55,048 --> 00:11:57,014
Oh, wow!
This is great, Dick!
267
00:11:57,016 --> 00:11:59,050
How did you find out
that Pendleton had
a bomb shelter?
268
00:11:59,052 --> 00:12:01,286
The same way I found out
about the airport.
269
00:12:01,288 --> 00:12:04,488
Mary and I snuck in here
for a "nooner."
270
00:12:04,490 --> 00:12:06,124
So, what are we
supposed to do?
271
00:12:06,126 --> 00:12:07,358
Just come down here
and live
272
00:12:07,360 --> 00:12:09,127
while the rest of
Rutherford perishes?
273
00:12:09,129 --> 00:12:10,361
No, no, no.
We'll invite people.
274
00:12:10,363 --> 00:12:11,629
We just have
to convince them
275
00:12:11,631 --> 00:12:13,631
to spend a night in
an abandoned bomb shelter
276
00:12:13,633 --> 00:12:15,133
without getting them
all suspicious.
277
00:12:15,135 --> 00:12:17,802
Well, I mean, there's
plenty of room.
278
00:12:17,804 --> 00:12:19,404
We can probably pack in,
like, 20 people.
279
00:12:19,406 --> 00:12:21,972
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
I do not want
a sweat-fest.
280
00:12:21,974 --> 00:12:24,709
Yeah, that's
a no-can-do, Harry.
281
00:12:24,711 --> 00:12:26,845
I tell you what.
Let's all just choose
one person.
282
00:12:26,847 --> 00:12:29,047
Yeah, yeah. Somebody
with practical skills
283
00:12:29,049 --> 00:12:30,181
that we'll need
to survive.
284
00:12:30,183 --> 00:12:31,516
Oh! How about
the plumber?
285
00:12:31,518 --> 00:12:32,850
I don't know.
We owe him money.
286
00:12:32,852 --> 00:12:34,919
What are we talking about?
287
00:12:34,921 --> 00:12:36,954
We need to save
our loved ones.
288
00:12:36,956 --> 00:12:39,023
What about all that stuff
you were talkin' about,
289
00:12:39,025 --> 00:12:41,459
about us not changing
the course of human events?
290
00:12:41,461 --> 00:12:42,594
Oh, come on, Sally.
291
00:12:42,596 --> 00:12:44,362
Do you really think
that saving Mary and Don
292
00:12:44,364 --> 00:12:45,630
will make a bean's worth
of difference?
293
00:12:45,632 --> 00:12:46,830
Oh, yeah.
Good point.
294
00:12:46,832 --> 00:12:48,666
So, Har,
who you bringing?
295
00:12:48,668 --> 00:12:49,733
Me?
Uh-huh.
296
00:12:49,735 --> 00:12:52,270
Oh! Well,
I'm bringin'...
297
00:12:52,272 --> 00:12:54,938
Flimfy Jorgensen.
298
00:12:54,940 --> 00:12:57,308
Because everything
that Flimfy does...
299
00:12:57,310 --> 00:13:00,512
is just
spanky-doodle-doo.
300
00:13:07,387 --> 00:13:08,820
What are you doing here?
301
00:13:08,822 --> 00:13:11,456
Why do you refuse
to respect my wishes?
302
00:13:11,458 --> 00:13:14,258
Mary, prepare yourself
for an evening
303
00:13:14,260 --> 00:13:19,063
of passion, romance,
and dried beef as
tender as the night.
304
00:13:19,065 --> 00:13:21,698
I have plans. I'm going
to the movies with Nina.
305
00:13:21,700 --> 00:13:23,300
Tell her we'll
bring her along...
306
00:13:23,302 --> 00:13:27,005
and then we'll
"accidentally" forget
to pick her up.
307
00:13:27,007 --> 00:13:28,673
Yeah, okay,
just give me a minute.
308
00:13:28,675 --> 00:13:29,908
I just want to check my door.
309
00:13:29,910 --> 00:13:31,642
Tell me if it makes
a loud bang.
310
00:13:35,181 --> 00:13:37,481
[sing-songing]
It does!
311
00:13:40,620 --> 00:13:42,120
On a lighter note,
312
00:13:42,122 --> 00:13:44,322
the fairgrounds
welcomed Big Bessie,
313
00:13:44,324 --> 00:13:47,225
a Guernsey from Toledo
who captured the blue ribbon
314
00:13:47,227 --> 00:13:50,128
tipping the scales
at 1,200 pounds.
315
00:13:50,130 --> 00:13:51,963
Ooh!
316
00:13:51,965 --> 00:13:54,599
That is one fat cow.
317
00:13:54,601 --> 00:13:59,837
But not as fat as
the one grazing at your
apartment, right, Chaz?
318
00:13:59,839 --> 00:14:01,939
I--I never said
my mom was fat.
319
00:14:01,941 --> 00:14:04,008
[laughs] Playful minx!
320
00:14:04,010 --> 00:14:07,345
Okay, and now for
tonight's forecast.
321
00:14:07,347 --> 00:14:11,715
It'll be clear and mild,
with winds...
322
00:14:11,717 --> 00:14:13,751
I mean, no winds.
No winds.
323
00:14:13,753 --> 00:14:16,720
Uh, calm. Dead calm.
324
00:14:16,722 --> 00:14:19,524
Well, that's good news for
the hundreds of citizens
325
00:14:19,526 --> 00:14:20,924
who'll be gathering
down at the pier
326
00:14:20,926 --> 00:14:24,595
to celebrate the renovation
of old downtown.
327
00:14:24,597 --> 00:14:26,197
Hundreds?
Yeah.
328
00:14:26,199 --> 00:14:29,600
Well, perhaps
all of those citizens
gathering at the pier
329
00:14:29,602 --> 00:14:32,136
should bring, uh,
inflatable pillows.
330
00:14:32,138 --> 00:14:37,141
Uh, big ones that
they can perhaps use
as flotation devices.
331
00:14:37,143 --> 00:14:39,877
Inflatable pillows?
That's kind of an odd thought.
332
00:14:39,879 --> 00:14:41,412
Well, not so odd, Chaz.
333
00:14:41,414 --> 00:14:43,214
You have one
in your dressing room
shaped like a girl.
334
00:14:43,216 --> 00:14:45,449
I've heard you
talking to it.
335
00:14:46,752 --> 00:14:48,486
Okay, that's
a big fat lie!
336
00:14:48,488 --> 00:14:49,620
All right, then.
337
00:14:49,622 --> 00:14:50,954
Have a great
tomorrow...
338
00:14:50,956 --> 00:14:52,857
because Sally
says so.
[breaks pencil]
339
00:14:52,859 --> 00:14:54,391
And we're clear!
[bell rings]
340
00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:00,631
Okay, Sally.
When you started here,
341
00:15:00,633 --> 00:15:01,732
I liked you. Okay?
342
00:15:01,734 --> 00:15:03,501
I was actually even thinking
of asking you out.
343
00:15:03,503 --> 00:15:05,069
But you blew it, baby.
344
00:15:05,071 --> 00:15:06,670
Did I do something
wrong, Chaz?
345
00:15:06,672 --> 00:15:07,872
Okay. You know what?
346
00:15:07,874 --> 00:15:10,007
The coy little I-just-
popped-out-of-an-egg routine
347
00:15:10,009 --> 00:15:11,542
might've worked before.
But, no.
348
00:15:11,544 --> 00:15:13,611
Now I know you are
a self-concerned,
349
00:15:13,613 --> 00:15:15,813
arrogant,
castrating person.
350
00:15:17,116 --> 00:15:18,049
Ouch.
Yeah.
351
00:15:19,886 --> 00:15:20,818
Chaz!
352
00:15:21,887 --> 00:15:23,887
Let me make it up to ya.
353
00:15:23,889 --> 00:15:25,656
Whaddaya say you and I
go out tonight?
354
00:15:25,658 --> 00:15:27,258
Just, you know...
together.
355
00:15:27,260 --> 00:15:28,760
We could meet
at the pier.
356
00:15:28,762 --> 00:15:30,428
What do you have in mind?
357
00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:32,729
Well, I thought perhaps
we could play a little game
358
00:15:32,731 --> 00:15:34,465
called...Twister.
359
00:15:35,802 --> 00:15:36,900
Oh.
360
00:15:38,037 --> 00:15:40,638
Well, then I'd better
do some stretches.
361
00:15:45,745 --> 00:15:47,111
So, you're having
a party?
362
00:15:47,113 --> 00:15:48,613
Well, it's actually
more of a gathering.
363
00:15:48,615 --> 00:15:50,981
You know, just us
and some loved ones.
364
00:15:50,983 --> 00:15:52,517
You know, my sister's
Sally Storm.
365
00:15:52,519 --> 00:15:54,652
The weather girl
who's always right?
366
00:15:54,654 --> 00:15:56,787
Well, she's not
always right.
367
00:15:56,789 --> 00:15:58,289
She didn't predict
that I'd be meetin'
368
00:15:58,291 --> 00:15:59,923
a sweet little angel
like yourself.
369
00:16:01,461 --> 00:16:02,593
Hey, you wanna come?
370
00:16:02,595 --> 00:16:04,061
I get off at 8.
371
00:16:04,063 --> 00:16:06,930
No, no. The party's at 8.
372
00:16:06,932 --> 00:16:08,466
You'll get off at 9.
373
00:16:11,171 --> 00:16:12,470
You know somethin'?
374
00:16:12,472 --> 00:16:14,138
I like you so much,
375
00:16:14,140 --> 00:16:15,939
I'm gonna pay
for these steaks.
376
00:16:22,114 --> 00:16:24,248
Thank God you're still here.
I need your help.
377
00:16:24,250 --> 00:16:25,616
I'm off the clock,
and I'm going
to the movies.
378
00:16:25,618 --> 00:16:27,251
With Mary. I know.
379
00:16:27,253 --> 00:16:29,153
But there's something
more important
that you have to do.
380
00:16:29,155 --> 00:16:31,188
Nina, you do care about
381
00:16:31,190 --> 00:16:33,424
Dr. Albright's health
and well-being, don't you?
382
00:16:33,426 --> 00:16:34,659
Yes, I care!
383
00:16:34,661 --> 00:16:36,727
Then you need to bring her
to a place tonight,
384
00:16:36,729 --> 00:16:38,029
where we'll all
be together.
385
00:16:38,031 --> 00:16:39,964
And our love will help us
deal with this
386
00:16:39,966 --> 00:16:41,532
inevitable disaster.
387
00:16:41,534 --> 00:16:43,067
Oh, my God.
388
00:16:43,069 --> 00:16:45,703
Are you talking about
an intervention?
389
00:16:45,705 --> 00:16:48,806
Uh, well...I, uh...
390
00:16:48,808 --> 00:16:50,307
Yes, Nina.
391
00:16:50,309 --> 00:16:51,876
It's an intervention.
392
00:16:51,878 --> 00:16:54,678
I know how Dr. Albright
likes to drink,
393
00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:56,547
but I didn't think
it had gotten this bad.
394
00:16:58,618 --> 00:16:59,783
It has.
395
00:17:01,520 --> 00:17:04,822
You know, my clergyman
has a special room
at the family center--
396
00:17:04,824 --> 00:17:06,757
And I'm sure it's lovely.
But for our purposes,
397
00:17:06,759 --> 00:17:08,759
we'll meet at an abandoned
bomb shelter
398
00:17:08,761 --> 00:17:10,261
behind the Poly Sci building.
399
00:17:10,263 --> 00:17:12,330
How am I supposed to
get her to go down there?
400
00:17:12,332 --> 00:17:14,097
[stammering] Well...
401
00:17:14,099 --> 00:17:17,401
tell her...that it's
the grand opening
of a new discothèque.
402
00:17:17,403 --> 00:17:20,204
and the free shooters
and hot wings stop
at 9:00 sharp.
403
00:17:20,206 --> 00:17:22,206
Gotcha.
You got it. 9:00. Remember.
404
00:17:22,208 --> 00:17:23,807
9:00. Sharp, Nina!
405
00:17:26,646 --> 00:17:28,545
Water. Batteries.
406
00:17:28,547 --> 00:17:29,580
Cat food?
407
00:17:30,850 --> 00:17:32,183
I'm not eating
cat food.
408
00:17:32,185 --> 00:17:36,154
Well, I knew
you'd be all stuck up
about it, Dick!
409
00:17:36,156 --> 00:17:38,923
So I got ya
Fancy Feast.
Oh.
410
00:17:38,925 --> 00:17:40,925
Thank goodness.
411
00:17:40,927 --> 00:17:41,926
Dick!
Mary!
412
00:17:41,928 --> 00:17:43,561
Hey, Sally!
What's goin' on?
413
00:17:43,563 --> 00:17:44,995
Yeah! What the hell
is going on?
414
00:17:44,997 --> 00:17:46,997
Well...wait till we're
all settled, Mary,
415
00:17:46,999 --> 00:17:48,733
and then I'll explain.
416
00:17:48,735 --> 00:17:50,568
Are any of her
relatives coming?
417
00:17:50,570 --> 00:17:53,003
No. I hate them.
418
00:17:53,005 --> 00:17:54,805
Sorry! I'm sorry I'm late.
419
00:17:54,807 --> 00:17:57,508
I had no idea there was
really a bomb shelter here.
420
00:17:57,510 --> 00:17:59,110
Yes, sweetheart.
It was build during
421
00:17:59,112 --> 00:18:01,345
the Cuban Missile Crisis.
Now, who the hell are you?
422
00:18:01,347 --> 00:18:04,649
Oh. I'm Sheryl
from the market.
Harry invited me.
423
00:18:04,651 --> 00:18:07,952
Oh, how nice of him,
considering he'll have
to give you half his rations.
424
00:18:07,954 --> 00:18:10,220
She will have the kibble.
I will have the bits.
425
00:18:11,657 --> 00:18:14,658
Hey. All right. You're
Sally Storm from TV.
426
00:18:14,660 --> 00:18:18,262
Yeah, that's me.
Be cool. Stay in school.
427
00:18:18,264 --> 00:18:19,864
Now, um...
428
00:18:19,866 --> 00:18:22,366
I suppose you'd all
like to know
429
00:18:22,368 --> 00:18:23,533
why you're here.
430
00:18:24,737 --> 00:18:27,004
Yeah.
Dr. Albright.
431
00:18:27,006 --> 00:18:29,540
Please know that none of us
are here to judge you.
432
00:18:32,178 --> 00:18:33,210
Why would you be?
433
00:18:33,212 --> 00:18:35,012
What you have
is a disease.
434
00:18:36,382 --> 00:18:37,681
You do?
435
00:18:37,683 --> 00:18:39,016
Well, could we crack
a window?
436
00:18:39,018 --> 00:18:41,485
I got Jimmy Buffett tickets
next Tuesday.
437
00:18:41,487 --> 00:18:43,453
I'm talking
about her drinking.
438
00:18:43,455 --> 00:18:44,622
My drinking?!
439
00:18:44,624 --> 00:18:46,056
[Stammering]
Now, just hang on--
440
00:18:46,058 --> 00:18:47,558
Hey, I thought you
looked familiar!
441
00:18:47,560 --> 00:18:49,259
I know you
from the supermarket.
442
00:18:49,261 --> 00:18:51,195
You're the white
zinfandel lady.
443
00:18:54,166 --> 00:18:55,566
They-- They call me that?
444
00:18:55,568 --> 00:18:57,834
Let me tell you
somethin', Albright.
445
00:18:57,836 --> 00:19:00,037
Your drinkin'
doesn't just hurt you.
446
00:19:00,039 --> 00:19:01,639
It hurts everyone
around you.
447
00:19:01,641 --> 00:19:03,141
Will you shut up?!
448
00:19:03,143 --> 00:19:05,542
I do not have
a drinking problem!
449
00:19:05,544 --> 00:19:07,444
Oh, Dick, it's time!
450
00:19:07,446 --> 00:19:10,348
Hit the dirty, Mary!
Everybody,
duck and cover!
451
00:19:15,655 --> 00:19:16,887
I don't hear anything.
452
00:19:16,889 --> 00:19:18,655
All right.
Let's check it out.
453
00:19:18,657 --> 00:19:20,557
Everybody, just
stay where you are!
454
00:19:20,559 --> 00:19:21,491
Careful!
455
00:19:23,629 --> 00:19:25,429
There's no tornado.
456
00:19:25,431 --> 00:19:27,998
No wind. Not even
a cloud in the sky!
457
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:29,499
There has to be,
unless you--
458
00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:33,804
Unless you were wrong.
459
00:19:35,741 --> 00:19:37,841
Oh, no...
460
00:19:39,011 --> 00:19:42,646
I gotta go push Chaz
off the pier myself.
461
00:19:46,852 --> 00:19:48,352
I don't know
how this happened.
462
00:19:48,354 --> 00:19:50,187
I start my weekend,
463
00:19:50,189 --> 00:19:52,390
determined to spend
a little time away from you,
464
00:19:52,392 --> 00:19:54,625
and I end up
in a cinderblock cell
465
00:19:54,627 --> 00:19:56,960
with you and your
entire family.
466
00:19:56,962 --> 00:19:58,261
I may have problems,
467
00:19:58,263 --> 00:20:01,431
but they have nothing
to do with alcohol!
468
00:20:06,172 --> 00:20:08,639
Well done, people!
She's completely recovered!
469
00:20:08,641 --> 00:20:10,440
Let's get out of here!
470
00:20:15,948 --> 00:20:17,114
Good job, Sally.
471
00:20:17,116 --> 00:20:19,349
Yeah. Really
good job.
472
00:20:19,351 --> 00:20:21,585
I know. I already
feel like an idiot.
473
00:20:21,587 --> 00:20:22,819
I just didn't factor in
474
00:20:22,821 --> 00:20:25,489
the single-band lake
effect off Mikford Pond.
475
00:20:25,491 --> 00:20:27,992
Yeah. Loser! Oo-oo!
Loser! Oo-oo!
476
00:20:29,762 --> 00:20:32,696
Yeah, so some things
in life really are
unpredictable.
477
00:20:32,698 --> 00:20:35,565
I mean, there are forces
out there that are greater
than humans.
478
00:20:35,567 --> 00:20:36,601
Even greater than us!
479
00:20:36,603 --> 00:20:39,604
Yep. Like elephants,
garlic, and Slinkies.
480
00:20:41,641 --> 00:20:42,907
You know, Harry,
you don't always
481
00:20:42,909 --> 00:20:44,976
have to join us
out here on the roof.
482
00:20:44,978 --> 00:20:46,743
I'll tell you
what's unpredictable.
483
00:20:46,745 --> 00:20:49,480
Mary wanted to take
a break from me.
484
00:20:49,482 --> 00:20:51,816
And the fact is, something
good actually came of it.
485
00:20:51,818 --> 00:20:54,518
So Mary's off
the sauce, huh?
Yeah.
486
00:20:54,520 --> 00:20:57,021
But when she's not drinking,
she gets a little crabby,
487
00:20:57,023 --> 00:20:59,390
so I told her that I needed
to take some time off.
488
00:20:59,392 --> 00:21:01,158
Hey, you know what?
That's a good thing,
489
00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:02,125
because, you know...
490
00:21:05,998 --> 00:21:08,932
Closed-Captioned by
J.R. Media Services, Inc.
Burbank, CA