- Good day to you. - Good day to you.
- Good morning, Tom. - Good morning, Grace.
- Where are you heading? - Sullivan's. Care to join me?
- I wish I could, but there's a problem. - Really?
You see, the good Lord blessed me with a fine wife.
I'll never forget the day I met her. I was on my way to the fair in Dooleen.
Or was it Kilkee? There's fine trout fishing to be had in Kilkee.
- Who said anything about trout? - Timothy Ryan was one for the trout.
He's been dead a fortnight. Some say he had the croup. Don't believe it.
The widow Moore gave him the evil eye.
- And your point? - Me wife and I have hit a rough patch.
A better woman never walked the Earth.
- She threw you out. - With just the clothes on my back.
- How much? - A shilling or two should suffice.
- Keep the change. - God bless you, Tommy, my boy.
Harry, weren't you supposed to meet me at Sullivan's?
Sorry, I got distracted by the scenery.
- This is Maggie. - We've met. Could you excuse us?
- Charmed to have met you, Harry. - Charmed.
- What's the hurry? - A word to the wise.
Stay away from Maggie. She's promised to a pig farmer with a large rake.
- A sister? - Wooden teeth.
A holo-matrix adjustment would fix it.
No, no. I'm not changing a thing. Fair Haven is perfect just the way it is.
Tommy boy, you forgot the leprechauns.
No leprechauns, no aliens, no starships.
This is a place where the crew can unwind.
- Morning, lads. - Heard any good confessions lately?
Doctor-patient confidentiality, Mr Paris.
Harry hasn't seen Sullivan's. Join us?
Don't mind if I do. I'll need to leave no later than 1300 hours.
- Medical emergency? - Not exactly.
I'm working on my homily for Sunday's mass
and I expect both you sinners to be in attendance.
He's kidding, right?
You wanted authenticity.
- Everybody, place your bets. - Three bob on Liam.
- Three bob it is. - Five shillings on Liam.
You'll hurt Harry's feelings.
Very well. Two shillings on Mr Kim
and I'll pray for a miracle.
Excuse me, I need counsel.
I'm off duty.
I've broken the fifth commandment.
Say ten Our Fathers. Call me tomorrow.
Gentlemen.
Come on, Mr Kim! Show him what for!
What'll it be?
I'm looking for my friends.
We're all friends here.
Have you seen Tom Paris?
He's over there with young Harry.
Poor sod.
No one's whipped Liam in three years.
There's a first time for everything.
An optimist, are you?
A realist.
Try! Try!
Come on, my boy. Push. Push.
I'm trying!
Come on! Try harder!
You got him! You got him!
You're losing!
What in God's name? Come on, Liam, push!
Yes! Yes!
I knew you could do it, Ensign.
So this is the program I've been hearing so much about.
- Welcome, weary traveller. - You have outdone yourself.
Everything is authentic except for one tiny detail.
The harp on the sign, it's backwards.
Everybody's a critic.
The captain is an aficionado of Irish history.
I hate to break up the party, but we have business.
A neutronic is wavefront approaching. Class-9.
Class-9.
Sorry, boys. Duty calls.
Uh... wavefront? Now, what in the name of God is that?
Um... a wee bit of bad weather.
Borg classification 3472, particle density anomaly.
Where did it come from?
From the collision of two neutron stars.
It is travelling at a velocity of 200,000 kilometres per second
and it extends for 3.6 light years.
How long before it hits?
- Approximately 15 hours. - We're already feeling its effects.
Neutron radiation is disrupting plasma flow. We can't jump to warp.
Impulse power isn't enough to outrun it.
Then we'll have to ride it out.
We'll generate an inverse warp field and drop anchor.
- That should protect us from turbulence. - What about the radiation?
Have the Doctor prepare inoculations for the crew.
Go to Yellow Alert. Get started on converting the warp core.
Let's batten down the hatches.
Captain.
- Just burning the midnight oil. - Midnight's come and gone.
Then it's time for a break.
- Do you mind? - I could use the company.
This approaching wavefront is bringing back unpleasant memories.
- How so? - I grew up on a farm in Indiana.
We used to have terrible thunder storms during summer.
A bolt of lightning, I'd bolt under the bed.
We had nasty weather on Talax, too.
- I always enjoyed a good ion storm. - Give me clear skies any day.
Now that you bring it up, I am concerned with keeping up morale.
- The crew is not used to sitting still. - Suggestions?
Everyone seems to love Fair Haven.
I thought we might initiate an open-door protocol on the holodeck.
Keep the program running 24 hours a day, let people come and go.
Permission granted. Fair Haven's just become our port in the storm.
I'm heading down there myself, if you'd like to join me.
There's a charming inn called the Ox and Lamb.
The owner offered to share some recipes.
- No, thanks. I still have work to do. - OK.
What'll it be?
A cup of tea would be nice.
I just made one. Cream?
Please.
So... what brings you to Fair Haven, Miss...?
Kathryn. I'm just passing through. On my way home.
- How long have you been on the road? - Five years, almost six.
- You must be homesick. - No. Sometimes.
Thank you.
- Cead mil failte. - Translation.
100,000 welcomes. It's an old Irish saying.
We're all friends here.
I had an aunt who used to have a saying like that.
"A stranger is a friend you haven't met yet."
- Definitely Irish. - She had an Irish temper, too.
She and my uncle had a place not far from here, in County Clare.
Then you're closer to home than you think, Katie O'Clare.
It's later than I thought. I've kept you long enough.
Stay a while. It's impolite to leave without playing a game of rings.
- I really can't, but thanks for the tea. - Afraid you'll lose?
I rarely lose.
Prove it.
- One game. - I'll set them up.
- Another ringer. - I'm not surprised.
- You stepped over the beer stain. - I did not.
By half a boot, then you moved back, hoping I wouldn't notice.
These boots are half a size too large, so my toes never crossed the line.
Your turn.
- For luck. - Getting sweet with the rings won't help.
We'll see.
- Damn. - Devil won't help you either.
Maybe rings aren't my forte after all.
Would you care to arm wrestle?
That's not a woman's game. You could get hurt.
I'm stronger than I look.
- That's quite a grip you have. - Not bad yourself.
I couldn't help but notice you have your leg braced against the bar?
How else do you expect me to win?
Will... we call it a draw?
Sounds good to me.
Shall we run a foot race down to the station and back?
It's good to make a new friend. You have a nice way about you.
Flattery is the food of fools.
Another pearl of wisdom from your auntie?
- Jonathan Swift. - Never heard of him.
- He was an author. - I was never one for reading.
That's too bad. Some of the greatest writers in the world are Irish.
Well, they say that Dr Gilroy has a library of books.
Next time I see him, I'll ask him if I can borrow one or two.
Good morning.
My God, will you look at the time?
Frannie, come here.
There's someone I want you to meet.
- Katie O'Clare, this is my wife Frances. - Pleased to meet you.
I hope Michael hasn't been bending your ear.
- My ear, my elbow. - We were arm wrestling.
Such a gentleman.
Thank you very much for your hospitality and now I really must leave.
- Drop in again before you leave town. - I will.
If you experience any dizziness, report to sickbay immediately.
- Good morning. - I believe it's afternoon. Oversleep?
- Holodeck. - Fair Haven?
Welcome weary traveller.
Even I admit Mr Paris' latest effort is a tour de force.
High praise from a hologram.
I was thinking, now that we've got this open-door policy,
maybe I could expand Fair Haven into holodeck 2.
- I could create the sea coast. - By all means.
I was hoping I could give my character a more active role.
The village priest was the most prominent member of the community,
held in the highest regard.
That's a great idea, doc.
We could send Father Mulligan on a retreat to a nearby monastery,
Where he takes a vow of silence and never speaks again.
Try it... and you'll be saying Hail Marys till St Patrick's Day.
- Time? - 30 seconds.
Let's see it.
All hands, this is the captain. Secure your stations and brace for impact.
Cleared the leading edge. Turbulence decreasing.
- Shields are holding. - Damage?
- A ruptured plasma conduit, deck 9. - Send a repair team.
Maintain Yellow Alert.
Let's hope that was the worst of it.
Captain's personal log. It's been ten hours since the storm hit.
We estimate three days before we're clear.
The crew's in good spirits.
Many have taken the opportunity to visit Fair Haven.
I met an interesting man there, and for a while I almost forgot he was a hologram.
We weren't exactly compatible,
but then again, Mr Paris didn't program him to my specifications.
Computer, display Fair Haven character Michael Sullivan.
Adjust his parameters to the following specifications.
Give him the education of a 19th century
third-year student at Trinity College.
Modification complete.
Now, access the character's interactive subroutines.
Make him more provocative.
Specify.
Give him a more complicated personality.
Specify.
More outspoken, more confident, not so reserved.
And make him more curious about the world around him.
- Modification complete. - Good.
Now...
...increase the character's height by...three centimetres.
Remove the facial hair.
No, I don't like that. Put some back. About two days' growth.
Better. One more thing.
Access his interpersonal subroutines. Familial characters.
Delete the wife.
Modification complete.
Pleased to meet you, Mr Sullivan.
Are you ill, Commander?
I am experiencing a slight loss of equilibrium
and some gastrointestinal distress.
- Space sickness? - Unlikely. I'm not prone to that condition.
- Perhaps you should go to sickbay. - I'll be fine.
- I tell you, we should add more fog. - Fog is depressing.
- It's authentic. - It's dangerous.
- All right, we could add a lighthouse. - It's Fair Haven. Sunshine.
What do you think? Irish sea coast, fog or no fog?
- I have no opinion. - He hasn't visited our paradise yet.
- Nor do I intend to. - You'd like it. A great place to meditate.
Imagine yourself sitting high on a bluff, overlooking the ocean.
The salt air, the rhythm of the waves rising and crashing against the rocks.
A tiny fishing boat, bobbing on the water below. Up and down, up and down.
I get the idea, Ensign. Thank you.
Mutton, creamed cabbage or blood pudding.
Explain.
I'm preparing an Irish meal at the Ox and Lamb
and I cannot decide on a main course.
- Blood pudding, you can't lose. - That was my first choice, too.
But replicating the lamb's intestines could be tricky
and every time I tried to heat the blood, it coagulates in the milk.
If you'll excuse me. I think I will consult the Doctor.
Excuse me, ma'am, have you seen Michael Sullivan?
- Try the pub. - I just came from there.
Then he'll be at the train station.
- Yeah. - Thank you.
Excuse me, sir, is the train to Galway running on time?
I'm afraid you've just missed it.
Have a seat. Wait for the next one.
- Do you know Jane Eldon? - Eldon? No, I've never met her.
I'd be terrified if you had. She's been dead 70 years.
No, I was thinking about her poetry.
It's too pastoral for my taste, don't you agree?
- I'm not familiar with her work. - Really?
What about Sean Gogarty? They have similar rhyming schemes.
You've some catching up to do.
I'm here every afternoon. You should join me some time.
I tried talking poetry with Seamus, but all he can do is recite limericks.
I'd love to. Strange place to read, though.
Not at all. I love the sound of the trains coming and going.
Gets me thinking about places I'd like to visit.
Have you travelled much yourself?
As a matter of fact. But there's one place I haven't been yet.
Castle O'Dell.
It's a steep climb, but from the top, you can see all the way to Dublin.
We'd better be moving.
They say when the sun goes down, the king of the faeries reclaims the castle.
- Maybe he'll invite us to supper. - You'll be dining alone without me.
One taste of the faeries' banquet and you never return to this world.
- Don't tell me you believe those stories. - Believe? No. But I do respect them.
- Can I ask you something, Katie? - Please.
Have you a man waiting for you at home?
- No. - Are you looking for one?
Why? Do you have somebody?
In Fair Haven, not unless you fancy a pig farmer.
Not my type.
What about a barkeep who reads poetry in strange places?
- I thought that was you. - Just getting in the spirit.
I can see that. I don't believe we've met.
Sullivan. Michael Sullivan.
- Chakotay. - That's a fine tattoo. Are you off a ship?
You could say that.
We're on our way up to the old castle. You're welcome to come with us.
Thanks, but I'm meeting Neelix at the Ox and Lamb.
You two have fun.
Is it my imagination or did he call you captain?
Did he?
Looks like the worst is yet to come. I just came from astrometrics.
Seven's found an increase in the neutronic gradient of the wavefront.
It'll be a rough ride when it hits.
We've still got two days. Start working on a new shield modulation.
That explains my space sickness.
My physiology is sensitive to neutronic gradients.
You'd make a good barometer, Tuvok. If you get queasy, we go to Red Alert.
- Thanks for your report, Commander. - Don't mention it.
"Hills Most Green, Hearts Unseen."
Jane Eldon. Catching up on my reading.
Those hills and hearts wouldn't happen to be in Ireland?
Wipe that smirk of your face. It's not what you think.
I wasn't thinking anything, but now that you mention it...
I have an interest in Irish culture.
Understandable. They've produced great writers for hundreds of years.
Not to mention great bartenders.
He's a hologram.
He seemed a little taller than the last time I saw him.
- I made modifications. - In the interest of Irish culture?
Exactly.
You seemed embarrassed when I ran into you. There was no reason to be.
It was nice to see you having a little fun.
He is rather charming. Too bad he's made of photons and force fields.
I never let that stand in my way.
- The boys are getting tired. - Them or you?
Faster, boys.
Computer, remove all characters except for Michael Sullivan.
- Can I ask you something, Katie? - Please.
- Would you mind if I kissed you? - I might even kiss you back.
There's no point in waiting any longer, is there?
I think I've waited long enough.
Is there something wrong?
Computer, recycle.
Come in.
We've organised a rings tournament tonight at Sullivan's.
Thanks, Neelix, but I have work to do.
The Doctor's going to sing something called Danny Boy.
Mossie Donegan's bringing his talking pig.
Let's just say I'd rather stick to reality right now.
- 1900 hours, if you change your mind. - Thank you.
Saints preserve us.
I possess superior hand-eye coordination.
That's not all that's superior.
The lily and the rose are staging a competition on your face.
Clarify.
The fullness of your lips and the paleness of your cheeks,
it's enough to make a man faint.
Then, in that case, perhaps we should sit down.
- I don't believe it. - It's called old-world charm, Harry.
What'll it be, gentlemen?
Nothing for me. Temperance is a virtue.
- Where's Michael? - Over there.
That's strange. I programmed him not to drink.
Must be a glitch in his subroutine.
Are these seats taken?
Sit anywhere you like.
Vile.
It's been 15 years since I touched the stuff.
- Making up for lost time? - I was hoping it might ease the pain.
- Are you in discomfort? - Agony's more like it.
How could you do this to me, Lord?
Why don't you ask him? You've got his ear.
Well...
Three days. The happiest three days of my life.
I was a fool to think she felt the same.
- I was such a fool! - Sit down.
- Shut your mouth or I'll shut it. - Oh, you will?
Hey, hey. Take it easy.
Um... why don't you tell us what happened?
We... spent a perfect day together, by the lake.
I drifted off to sleep and when I woke up, she was gone.
- Where is she, Tom? - Who?
Katie O'Clare, who else?
- Katie O'Clare? - Your friend.
Are you sure you didn't.. Misinterpret her interest?
We're all friends. Maybe she was being friendly.
- Are you calling me a liar? - No, not at all.
I thought Katie and me were in love.
- I'll have to reprogram. - What's the matter?
- I'm not good enough? - I didn't say that.
- Tell me where she's gone. - I don't know.
I think you do!
Gentlemen, please! Love thy neighbour.
I remember trying to reach the holodeck controls and somebody grabbed my leg.
Maybe it was the talking pig.
If it was, he had one hell of a left hook.
- What's all this? - There's been trouble in paradise.
An altercation in the pub. Several crewmen were injured. Nothing serious.
- Arm wrestling get out of hand? - Not exactly.
It was Michael Sullivan. He was...
...looking for someone.
Why don't we take a little walk?
Let me guess. That someone is me.
I don't mean to pry, but we've got a broken-hearted hologram
who believed you were in love.
I was sure he'd be onto the next lass by now. I hope he's all right.
Far from it. The fight spilled out onto the street.
Before long, he climbed up a tree and began shouting your name.
Mr Neelix managed to talk him down.
A malfunction in his behavioural subroutines?
I checked. His subroutines are fine.
But you made a number of alterations to his program.
- Minor ones. - To make him more appealing?
- You're starting to pry, Doctor. - I apologise, but I'm worried about you.
Michael Sullivan is a hologram. His broken heart can be mended.
Your feelings, however, are a little more... complicated.
I won't be climbing any trees if that's what you're worried about.
If you decide you want to talk, I've been hearing a lot of confessions lately.
Let me know.
You want a confession, Doctor?
All right.
I've become romantically involved with a hologram, if that's possible.
- What happened? - Girl meets boy.
- Girl modifies boy's subroutines. - Were you intimate?
None of your business. Let's say it was a memorable three days.
- I don't see the problem. - Don't you? Michael Sullivan is my type.
Attractive, intelligent. We share the same interests.
If there's something I don't like, I can change it.
I've noticed humans try to change their lover. What's the difference?
In this case, it works.
We had a picnic by the lake yesterday.
Michael drifted off to sleep, his head lying on my shoulder.
I remember thinking this is close to perfect, then he began to snore.
Did I nudge him with my elbow, hoping he'd stop?
Did I whisper in his ear to wake him? No.
Why bother when I could alter his vocal algorithms? I was about to do it,
when I realised that everything was an illusion, including him.
So I left. I almost wrote him a note to say goodbye. Can you believe that?
A Dear John letter to a hologram.
I understand your trepidation, but you're the captain.
You can't have a relationship with any of the crew, your subordinates.
Where does that leave you?
Occasional dalliances with passing aliens?
Voyager could be in the Delta Quadrant for a long time.
- A hologram is the only alternative. - He's not real.
As real as I am. Photons and force fields, flesh and blood,
it's the same if your feelings are real.
He makes a joke, you laugh. Is that an illusion?
He makes you think. Does it matter how his molecules are aligned?
Did it occur to you that it's not a question of whether or not he's real?
Meaning?
Stop trying to control every aspect of this relationship.
Romance is born out of differences, as well as similarities.
Out of the unexpected, as well as the familiar.
Maybe I just needed to be sure that he'd love me back.
But isn't that the risk you always take? Hologram or not?
All I know is... Michael Sullivan was up in that tree shouting your name.
I've never been afraid of taking risks.
Then perhaps, next time, you should just let him snore.
The gradient's rising. 30 million terajoules... 40 million...
- Shields? - Holding.
60 million.
The inverse warp field's destabilising. We're losing our anchor.
How long before we're clear?
- At least five minutes. - Four minutes too long.
The gradient's rising fast. 90 million.
Stabilisers are off-line!
- Thrusters? - No effect.
- Shields failing. - How close to the perimeter?
1,000 kilometres. We're being pulled by the storm.
- What have you in mind? - Deflector beam to cut a path through.
We'd have to route all available power to the emitters.
Not enough. Primary systems down.
Transfer all secondary power sources - transporters, replicators, holodecks.
There's no time to go through holo-grid shutdown sequence.
We'd lose most of Fair Haven.
Do it.
Hull fractures, decks 6 and 7.
- You've got all the power. Is it enough? - Negative.
Siphon energy from the plasma network.
- Every last deciwatt. - Deflector beam active.
We're approaching the perimeter. 500 kilometres...
- 400... - Deflector output is dropping.
Give him everything we've got. Life support.
Scrape the residual ions off the sonic showers if you have to.
Doesn't look good. With this much photonic decay,
we'll be able to save 5, maybe 10%.
- So much for the luck of the Irish. - Easier to start from scratch.
It wouldn't be the same. It's like rewriting a novel after the datafile's been deleted.
All the details, the nuances, they're all gone.
- Morning, lads. - Seamus.
- Looks like a storm brewing. - Storm?
Heading in from the west. Could be a big one.
- Great. - Could you spare a shilling or two?
My wife and I made up last night and I wanted...
Grid's destabilising. We'd better start on those repairs.
So what'll we try and save? The Ox and Lamb? The church? Maggie O'Halloran?
There's someone I should talk to before we decide.
Come in.
- Fair Haven didn't fare too well. - I'll break the news to the crew.
With your permission, I'd like to reconstruct the program.
- How long will it take? - Six or seven weeks.
Harry tells me we should be able to save about 10% of the existing elements.
I thought you might have a suggestion or two.
Computer, is Fair Haven character Michael Sullivan still intact?
Affirmative.
Activate him.
Hello.
You disappeared on me, Katie.
I woke up and you'd gone.
- I had some thinking to do. - Are you done?
Yes.
- I'm leaving Fair Haven. - Why?
- Because... - That's not a very good reason.
- The situation is complicated. - Another man?
- No. - Your friends?
- They don't approve of me? - They think you're charming.
Are you not ready to settle down yet?
I'm as ready as I'll ever be.
- You're not making sense. - No, I guess I'm not.
I've a feeling that you won't be forgetting us that easily.
Fair Haven has that effect on people.
But there's one thing I want you to know.
I love you, Katie.
I might actually be passing this way in six or seven weeks.
Maybe I'll stop by the pub.
See that you do.
Computer, end program.
Wait.
I want to make one more modification to the character.
Specify.
Deny Kathryn Janeway any future access to his behavioural subroutines.
Modification complete.
Save program.