1
00:00:05,380 --> 00:00:08,257
- Oh, hey! How was your audition?
- Hey.

2
00:00:08,842 --> 00:00:11,260
I'm sorry, do I know you?

3
00:00:12,762 --> 00:00:13,804
What are you doing?

4
00:00:13,972 --> 00:00:16,724
Practicing blowing you off.
I'm gonna be a big movie star!

5
00:00:16,891 --> 00:00:18,892
Oh, you got it?

6
00:00:19,060 --> 00:00:22,646
- Not yet, but the audition went great!
- What's it for?

7
00:00:22,814 --> 00:00:26,442
A big-budget period movie about
three Italian brothers...

8
00:00:26,609 --> 00:00:30,320
...who come to America at the turn
of the century. It's classy.

9
00:00:30,488 --> 00:00:34,783
The director's supposed to be
the next-next Martin Scorsese.

10
00:00:36,619 --> 00:00:37,911
The "next-next"?

11
00:00:38,079 --> 00:00:41,915
A guy from Chicago's supposed to be
the next Martin Scorsese.

12
00:00:42,083 --> 00:00:44,209
This guy's right after him.

13
00:00:45,128 --> 00:00:46,795
[CELL PHONE RINGS]

14
00:00:47,547 --> 00:00:48,630
Hello?

15
00:00:48,798 --> 00:00:54,636
Joey, it's Estelle. I just talked to
the casting people. They loved you!

16
00:00:54,804 --> 00:00:55,888
They loved me!

17
00:00:57,140 --> 00:00:59,641
They want to see you again tomorrow.

18
00:00:59,809 --> 00:01:01,935
- Oh, my God.
ESTELLE [OVER PHONE]: Just one thing.

19
00:01:02,103 --> 00:01:05,814
Do you have a problem
with full-frontal nudity?

20
00:01:07,692 --> 00:01:11,403
Are you kidding me?
I never rent a movie without it!

21
00:01:12,280 --> 00:01:13,947
Oh.

22
00:01:14,449 --> 00:01:18,118
Uh, okay, let me call you back.

23
00:01:18,286 --> 00:01:21,997
- What's the matter?
- They want me naked in the movie.

24
00:01:22,165 --> 00:01:23,457
- Wow.
JOEY: I know.

25
00:01:23,625 --> 00:01:28,754
- My grandmother's gonna see this.
- Grandma's gonna have to get in line.

26
00:02:10,839 --> 00:02:13,382
The wedding's so close.
Are you nervous?

27
00:02:13,550 --> 00:02:16,510
Yeah, but I also can't
wait till it's over.

28
00:02:16,678 --> 00:02:19,805
We have a pact not to have sex
again until the wedding.

29
00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:22,683
A "no sex" pact, huh?

30
00:02:23,351 --> 00:02:26,979
I have one of those with
every woman in America.

31
00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:32,317
Will you give me a hand
making up the guest bedroom?

32
00:02:32,485 --> 00:02:34,945
Cousin Cassie's staying with us
for a few days.

33
00:02:35,113 --> 00:02:38,490
Cassie? I haven't seen her
in, like, forever.

34
00:02:38,658 --> 00:02:41,827
I wonder if she still carries
a Barbie everywhere?

35
00:02:41,995 --> 00:02:44,454
- She's 25 years old.
- So? I still...

36
00:02:44,622 --> 00:02:46,165
You're probably right.

37
00:02:48,001 --> 00:02:49,418
- Hi.
MONICA & PHOEBE: Hey.

38
00:02:49,586 --> 00:02:51,587
Pheebs, can I talk to you
over here for a second?

39
00:02:51,754 --> 00:02:53,088
PHOEBE:
Yeah.

40
00:02:53,256 --> 00:02:55,340
Subtle, guys.

41
00:02:56,092 --> 00:02:57,176
What?

42
00:02:57,343 --> 00:03:01,263
I know you're planning my
surprise bridal shower.

43
00:03:01,890 --> 00:03:06,393
Ha, okay, well, don't ruin it.
Just play along, at least.

44
00:03:06,561 --> 00:03:08,645
- Okay. Sorry.
RACHEL: Okay.

45
00:03:09,606 --> 00:03:12,191
Oh, my God.
We have to throw her a shower?

46
00:03:17,697 --> 00:03:20,199
What'd you decide to do
about the movie?

47
00:03:20,366 --> 00:03:22,743
I don't know.

48
00:03:23,119 --> 00:03:27,164
It's not like it's porn.
This is a serious, legitimate movie.

49
00:03:27,332 --> 00:03:29,750
Nudity's really important
to the story.

50
00:03:29,918 --> 00:03:32,085
That's what you say about porn.

51
00:03:33,004 --> 00:03:35,339
Maybe I shouldn't go on the callback.

52
00:03:35,506 --> 00:03:39,635
No, you should. A lot of major
actors do nude scenes.

53
00:03:39,802 --> 00:03:42,304
The chance to star in a movie?
Come on!

54
00:03:42,972 --> 00:03:48,227
That's true. And I'm only naked in
one scene. It sounds really great.

55
00:03:48,394 --> 00:03:51,480
My character's Catholic. He falls
in love with a Jewish girl.

56
00:03:51,648 --> 00:03:54,316
We run away and get caught
in a big rainstorm.

57
00:03:54,484 --> 00:03:58,028
We go into a barn, undress each other
and hold each other.

58
00:03:58,196 --> 00:04:01,240
It's really sweet and tender.

59
00:04:01,407 --> 00:04:02,991
Plus, everyone is gonna
see your thing.

60
00:04:03,159 --> 00:04:04,368
[LAUGHS]

61
00:04:07,455 --> 00:04:09,539
When can we have this shower?

62
00:04:09,707 --> 00:04:13,001
She has so much going on,
we have only two options.

63
00:04:13,169 --> 00:04:16,046
- We have Friday.
- That's just two days away.

64
00:04:16,214 --> 00:04:19,383
- What is the other option?
- Yesterday.

65
00:04:19,926 --> 00:04:22,844
Well, if we make it yesterday,
woo-hoo, we're done.

66
00:04:23,388 --> 00:04:25,639
It's impossible.
We can't do this by Friday.

67
00:04:25,807 --> 00:04:28,350
We have to find a place,
invite people, get food.

68
00:04:28,518 --> 00:04:30,811
There's too much to do.

69
00:04:30,979 --> 00:04:33,438
- We cannot do it!
- Calm down!

70
00:04:33,606 --> 00:04:36,858
Okay. I'm sorry, you're right.
I'm sorry.

71
00:04:37,026 --> 00:04:38,527
Just calm down, woman!

72
00:04:41,197 --> 00:04:43,240
Phoebe, I already did.

73
00:04:43,408 --> 00:04:45,826
- All right, then I need to calm down.
- Okay.

74
00:04:47,245 --> 00:04:49,621
I think we can do this
if we just get organized.

75
00:04:49,789 --> 00:04:51,707
- Uh-huh.
- We have two days to plan this party.

76
00:04:51,874 --> 00:04:54,668
- We just need to make fast decisions.
- Mm-hm.

77
00:04:54,836 --> 00:04:56,211
Where will we have it?

78
00:04:56,379 --> 00:04:59,298
- Um, here. What time?
- Four o'clock. Food?

79
00:04:59,507 --> 00:05:02,759
- Finger sandwiches and tea.
- Ooh, great. Very Monica.

80
00:05:02,927 --> 00:05:05,262
- And chili.
- Ah, you went one too far.

81
00:05:06,723 --> 00:05:08,849
- Uh, flowers or balloons?
- Both.

82
00:05:09,017 --> 00:05:11,143
- We're paying for this. Okay.
- Neither.

83
00:05:11,311 --> 00:05:17,024
- Um, what should we do for the theme?
- "Lusts of the Flesh."

84
00:05:18,234 --> 00:05:21,570
- What?
- I don't know. Cowboy theme?

85
00:05:23,614 --> 00:05:24,740
[DOOR OPENS]

86
00:05:24,907 --> 00:05:26,742
- Hey.
- Hey.

87
00:05:26,909 --> 00:05:30,495
I'm glad we decided not to sleep
together before the wedding.

88
00:05:30,705 --> 00:05:32,998
Oh, boy. Me too.

89
00:05:33,541 --> 00:05:35,751
You know, I was thinking,
if we had a big fight...

90
00:05:35,918 --> 00:05:38,211
- Mm-hm.
...and, uh, we broke up for a few hours.

91
00:05:38,379 --> 00:05:42,090
- Yeah.
- Technically, we could have sex again.

92
00:05:43,634 --> 00:05:46,136
What do you think,
bossy and domineering?

93
00:05:46,304 --> 00:05:48,972
The wedding's off,
sloppy and immature.

94
00:05:49,140 --> 00:05:50,474
- That's me. Come on.
- Okay.

95
00:05:50,641 --> 00:05:54,144
Wait. Cassie's in the guest room.
We're going to lunch.

96
00:05:54,312 --> 00:05:56,438
Get rid of her, obsessive and shrill!

97
00:05:57,440 --> 00:05:59,900
Shrill? The wedding is back on.

98
00:06:00,860 --> 00:06:01,943
[DOOR OPENS]

99
00:06:02,111 --> 00:06:05,447
I thought I heard voices.
You must be Chandler.

100
00:06:06,074 --> 00:06:09,201
- Hi. Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you too.

101
00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:11,912
- So, ready to go?
- Yeah.

102
00:06:29,847 --> 00:06:32,641
- Chandler?
- I'll be right with you.

103
00:06:35,019 --> 00:06:37,646
- Cassie needs to stay at your place.
- Why?

104
00:06:37,814 --> 00:06:41,483
Because "Pervie Perverson" here
can't stop staring at her.

105
00:06:41,901 --> 00:06:44,194
Chandler, she's our cousin!

106
00:06:44,362 --> 00:06:47,406
I wasn't staring.
I was listening intently.

107
00:06:47,573 --> 00:06:51,076
It's called being a good
conversationalist. Watch.

108
00:06:51,244 --> 00:06:52,869
Say something.

109
00:06:53,037 --> 00:06:56,331
You were staring about eight inches
south of there.

110
00:06:57,250 --> 00:06:59,543
Fine. She can stay at my place.

111
00:06:59,710 --> 00:07:02,003
What does Cassie look like now?

112
00:07:02,171 --> 00:07:04,714
- She looks exactly like Aunt Marilyn.
ROSS: Huh.

113
00:07:04,882 --> 00:07:07,843
So this Aunt Marilyn,
is she coming to the wedding?

114
00:07:08,010 --> 00:07:09,928
Wafer-thin ice.

115
00:07:15,601 --> 00:07:16,643
Hey, I'm back.

116
00:07:16,811 --> 00:07:17,894
Hi, Joey.

117
00:07:18,062 --> 00:07:21,148
Uh, so, will I be reading
the same scene again?

118
00:07:21,315 --> 00:07:24,151
I tried to call you.
You didn't need to come today.

119
00:07:24,735 --> 00:07:26,486
Oh, great.

120
00:07:27,447 --> 00:07:29,781
I'd have been perfect for this part.

121
00:07:29,949 --> 00:07:33,493
You made a bad decision and
ruined your movie. Good day!

122
00:07:33,661 --> 00:07:38,540
You didn't need to come, because the
director saw your tape and loved it.

123
00:07:41,002 --> 00:07:43,128
And scene.

124
00:07:45,131 --> 00:07:47,382
Huh? Wasn't that fun?

125
00:07:47,550 --> 00:07:50,886
We did a little improv there. Yeah!

126
00:07:51,053 --> 00:07:52,762
So, you... You were saying?

127
00:07:52,930 --> 00:07:55,599
The director wants to meet you
tomorrow.

128
00:07:55,766 --> 00:07:57,934
Wow. Sure. That's great.

129
00:07:58,102 --> 00:08:00,395
Your agent said you're okay
with nudity.

130
00:08:00,563 --> 00:08:03,523
Yeah, sure. As long as
it's handled tastefully.

131
00:08:03,691 --> 00:08:06,276
And that barn is not too cold.

132
00:08:09,363 --> 00:08:11,615
Terrific.
Well, uh, there's one more thing.

133
00:08:11,782 --> 00:08:17,037
Uh... Uh, it's important to the director
that everything in the movie is authentic.

134
00:08:17,955 --> 00:08:20,540
In your love scene with Sarah...

135
00:08:20,708 --> 00:08:24,878
...she talks about how she's never
seen a naked man who wasn't Jewish.

136
00:08:25,046 --> 00:08:26,087
So...

137
00:08:26,255 --> 00:08:27,589
[CHUCKLES]

138
00:08:29,008 --> 00:08:30,884
So, what?

139
00:08:31,052 --> 00:08:35,847
So, uh, well, the director is insisting
that whoever play that part...

140
00:08:36,015 --> 00:08:39,893
...be authentically, uh, anatomically...

141
00:08:40,061 --> 00:08:42,812
...not Jewish.
You know what I'm saying?

142
00:08:42,980 --> 00:08:44,397
Yes!

143
00:08:45,024 --> 00:08:46,900
No. What?

144
00:08:48,903 --> 00:08:53,365
An Italian Catholic immigrant
at this time would not be...

145
00:08:53,533 --> 00:08:54,783
Bar mitzvah-ed?

146
00:08:59,997 --> 00:09:02,666
- To get this part, you can't be...
- No.

147
00:09:02,833 --> 00:09:03,875
- But you are?
- Yep.

148
00:09:04,043 --> 00:09:06,545
- You told them you weren't?
- That's right.

149
00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:09,130
Wow. Wow.

150
00:09:09,507 --> 00:09:12,551
It's definitely all gone?
There's nothing there to work with?

151
00:09:16,931 --> 00:09:20,642
- What were you thinking?
- I don't know. I just want this part.

152
00:09:20,810 --> 00:09:25,063
They say no matter what you're asked
during an audition, say yes.

153
00:09:25,231 --> 00:09:27,899
They want you to ride a horse,
say you can.

154
00:09:28,067 --> 00:09:30,235
You figure out how to do it later.

155
00:09:30,403 --> 00:09:36,575
This is not like learning to ride
a horse. This is like learning to...

156
00:09:36,742 --> 00:09:38,827
...grow a turtleneck.

157
00:09:44,041 --> 00:09:50,088
I know, okay? Tomorrow,
when I go meet the director...

158
00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:53,758
...I have to take my clothes off so
they can see what my body looks like.

159
00:09:53,926 --> 00:09:56,595
Oh, my God. What are you gonna do?

160
00:09:57,221 --> 00:10:00,807
I have to call my agent
and tell her I can't do the part.

161
00:10:00,975 --> 00:10:02,225
[JOEY SIGHS]

162
00:10:02,393 --> 00:10:03,727
Unless...

163
00:10:05,563 --> 00:10:06,605
Unless what?

164
00:10:06,772 --> 00:10:11,026
This may sound crazy, but there may
be something we could...

165
00:10:11,193 --> 00:10:12,402
...fashion.

166
00:10:16,407 --> 00:10:19,576
- Like what?
- Well, I'm not sure yet, but, um...

167
00:10:19,744 --> 00:10:22,120
...off the top of my head,
I'm thinking...

168
00:10:22,288 --> 00:10:26,791
...double-sided tape
and some sort of luncheon meat.

169
00:10:33,549 --> 00:10:37,469
I've got a great idea for party
favors for the shower.

170
00:10:37,637 --> 00:10:41,473
We get mahogany boxes and
carve everyone's names in them.

171
00:10:41,641 --> 00:10:45,226
Then inside is each person's
individual birthstone.

172
00:10:47,104 --> 00:10:50,190
Okay. Okay.

173
00:10:50,983 --> 00:10:53,109
- All right, you take care of that.
- Okay.

174
00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:58,823
Meanwhile, the party's tomorrow
and we don't have a guest list.

175
00:10:58,991 --> 00:11:03,620
Okay. Who do we know that's coming?
Me. Are you?

176
00:11:06,957 --> 00:11:08,458
- Hey.
- Hey, what's up?

177
00:11:08,626 --> 00:11:12,337
I'm making something for Joey.
Can I raid your fridge?

178
00:11:12,505 --> 00:11:14,339
Have at it.

179
00:11:15,299 --> 00:11:19,469
All right. Turkey?
Mm, that won't work.

180
00:11:19,637 --> 00:11:22,138
Cheese? That won't work.

181
00:11:22,306 --> 00:11:26,059
Olive loaf? I hope that won't work.

182
00:11:28,270 --> 00:11:29,771
Are you making him a sandwich?

183
00:11:30,856 --> 00:11:33,441
No, it's, um, more like a wrap.

184
00:11:35,861 --> 00:11:37,862
Okay, so, um, I'm gonna go, guys.

185
00:11:38,030 --> 00:11:41,741
So you can get back to deciding on
what to get me for a present!

186
00:11:41,909 --> 00:11:43,118
[GIGGLES]

187
00:11:43,285 --> 00:11:44,411
[PHOEBE AND RACHEL CHUCKLE]

188
00:11:44,578 --> 00:11:45,620
[DOOR CLOSES]

189
00:11:45,788 --> 00:11:48,289
We have to get her a present?

190
00:11:49,041 --> 00:11:52,210
Okay, but look. Look at what I got.

191
00:11:52,378 --> 00:11:54,504
It's her address book.
We have a guest list.

192
00:11:54,672 --> 00:11:56,339
Ah.

193
00:11:57,425 --> 00:12:00,760
You're amazing. Did you pull
that out of her purse?

194
00:12:00,928 --> 00:12:03,430
Uh-huh. And a little seed money
for the party.

195
00:12:03,597 --> 00:12:05,265
Oh, nice.

196
00:12:09,395 --> 00:12:11,438
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

197
00:12:12,273 --> 00:12:13,356
[CASSIE SIGHS]

198
00:12:13,524 --> 00:12:15,316
Cassie?

199
00:12:15,526 --> 00:12:18,027
- Hey, Ross.
- [STAMMERS] Hi. Ha, ha.

200
00:12:18,195 --> 00:12:20,780
It's been so long!

201
00:12:21,615 --> 00:12:23,241
Last time I saw you...

202
00:12:23,409 --> 00:12:27,078
...you were setting up your tent
in line for Return of the Jedi.

203
00:12:27,246 --> 00:12:28,580
[STAMMERS]
Oh, uh, that's right.

204
00:12:28,748 --> 00:12:33,293
So you did see me that day.
Because it seemed like you didn't.

205
00:12:33,461 --> 00:12:34,502
[CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY]

206
00:12:34,670 --> 00:12:38,214
- Yeah, sorry about that.
- It's okay. Come on in.

207
00:12:38,382 --> 00:12:42,427
Thanks for letting me stay here.
Monica's place was nice.

208
00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:46,055
But her fiancé sure stares a lot.

209
00:12:46,223 --> 00:12:47,807
Oh.

210
00:13:07,578 --> 00:13:11,456
Oh, my God! You do a great Chandler!

211
00:13:12,958 --> 00:13:14,000
Uh-huh.

212
00:13:14,168 --> 00:13:15,335
[CASSIE GIGGLES]

213
00:13:15,503 --> 00:13:18,129
Yeah, I have a knack for impressions.

214
00:13:18,297 --> 00:13:21,424
Well, maybe after we get re-acquainted,
uh, you could do me.

215
00:13:21,592 --> 00:13:23,551
Yeah. No!

216
00:13:32,645 --> 00:13:36,105
Cassie, how you...?
How you doing on that...

217
00:13:36,273 --> 00:13:37,982
...hot dog?

218
00:13:40,319 --> 00:13:43,530
- I'm all done.
- Thank God.

219
00:13:45,741 --> 00:13:49,619
The last time we hung out was when
our parents rented that beach house.

220
00:13:49,787 --> 00:13:51,996
Oh, right, right.
Ooh, remember the time...

221
00:13:52,164 --> 00:13:55,667
...l, uh, pinned you down
and tickled you until you cried?

222
00:13:55,835 --> 00:13:57,293
[BOTH CHUCKLING]

223
00:13:57,461 --> 00:14:00,421
We're probably too old to do that now.

224
00:14:02,800 --> 00:14:07,637
I'll always remember that summer.
It's when I got all these freckles.

225
00:14:07,805 --> 00:14:09,347
Uh-huh, Uh-huh.

226
00:14:10,140 --> 00:14:12,475
And... And I'll always remember
that summer...

227
00:14:12,643 --> 00:14:17,480
...because that's when I realized
that we are related.

228
00:14:17,731 --> 00:14:19,649
It took you that long
to figure it out, huh?

229
00:14:19,859 --> 00:14:21,192
Um, I'm a little slow.

230
00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:22,861
[BOTH CHUCKLE]

231
00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:26,614
Just as our children would be.

232
00:14:33,622 --> 00:14:34,789
- Hi.
WOMAN 1: Hi.

233
00:14:34,957 --> 00:14:37,500
How are you? Good. Hi.
Thanks for coming.

234
00:14:37,668 --> 00:14:40,587
WOMAN 2: Oh, thank you.
- Thank you. So nice to see you.

235
00:14:40,754 --> 00:14:43,673
WOMAN 3: No, thanks.
- Okay. Hey, Rach?

236
00:14:43,841 --> 00:14:46,718
- Yeah?
- Who the hell are all these people?

237
00:14:47,219 --> 00:14:50,013
I don't know.
I called everybody in her book.

238
00:14:50,180 --> 00:14:53,725
These are the ones that could
show up on 24 hours' notice.

239
00:14:53,893 --> 00:14:57,520
There's a word for people like that:
Losers.

240
00:14:59,023 --> 00:15:02,442
Hi, I'm Rachel. This is Phoebe.
I'm the maid of honor.

241
00:15:02,610 --> 00:15:03,735
How do you know Monica?

242
00:15:03,903 --> 00:15:06,487
- I was her accountant four years ago.
- Oh...

243
00:15:06,655 --> 00:15:10,867
I'm interested to find out who's been
doing her taxes the last four years.

244
00:15:12,703 --> 00:15:14,370
That's great.

245
00:15:15,706 --> 00:15:19,500
- When is Monica supposed to get here?
RACHEL & PHOEBE: I don't know.

246
00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:22,170
Excuse us.

247
00:15:24,340 --> 00:15:27,175
- You didn't tell her?
- You were supposed to.

248
00:15:27,343 --> 00:15:31,220
You were supposed to tell her to come!
I was bringing the cake!

249
00:15:31,388 --> 00:15:35,516
- Fine, I'll go call her.
- And please tell her to bring a cake!

250
00:15:40,564 --> 00:15:41,689
[DOOR OPENS]

251
00:15:41,857 --> 00:15:46,694
We have a lot of options. A number
of prototypes for you to try on.

252
00:15:47,529 --> 00:15:48,905
Wow, those look great.

253
00:15:49,073 --> 00:15:53,910
Okay, this one's a mushroom cap.
Uh, this one is made of bologna.

254
00:15:54,078 --> 00:15:56,871
- And... And the toothpicks?
- Just until the glue dries.

255
00:15:57,039 --> 00:15:58,414
Thank God.

256
00:15:58,582 --> 00:15:59,791
[BOTH CHUCKLE]

257
00:15:59,959 --> 00:16:03,294
These are more realistic,
but perishable.

258
00:16:03,462 --> 00:16:06,798
Over here, we have pink suede,
which is nice.

259
00:16:06,966 --> 00:16:09,509
But if it gets wet, it'll shrink.

260
00:16:09,677 --> 00:16:12,428
Maybe we'll just
take that one away.

261
00:16:13,305 --> 00:16:18,142
I also did a little something in fur,
but, uh, that's really just for me.

262
00:16:20,896 --> 00:16:25,358
Why don't you try these on?
We'll get a better idea of what works.

263
00:16:25,526 --> 00:16:29,070
Thanks, you are such a good friend.
And this is so weird.

264
00:16:35,953 --> 00:16:36,995
JOEY:
Ow.

265
00:16:37,162 --> 00:16:39,414
- Toothpick?
JOEY: Yeah.

266
00:16:40,666 --> 00:16:43,126
- What are you trying now?
JOEY: The Fruit Roll-up.

267
00:16:43,293 --> 00:16:45,378
- And?
JOEY: Delicious.

268
00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:47,922
Joey.

269
00:16:48,090 --> 00:16:51,426
JOEY: Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
We have a winner!

270
00:16:51,593 --> 00:16:52,927
What? Which one?

271
00:16:54,221 --> 00:16:56,973
The Silly Putty.
Not so silly anymore!

272
00:16:57,141 --> 00:16:58,933
[JOEY LAUGHS]

273
00:17:05,107 --> 00:17:07,233
[WEAPONS FIRING ON TV]

274
00:17:07,401 --> 00:17:12,739
ROSS:
She's your cousin. She's your cousin.

275
00:17:12,906 --> 00:17:18,411
If she knew what was going on in
your head, she'd think you were sick.

276
00:17:24,376 --> 00:17:28,421
Or would she?
Let's back up for a second.

277
00:17:28,589 --> 00:17:33,509
She was the one who suggested
opening a bottle of wine.

278
00:17:33,677 --> 00:17:36,721
She was the one who
turned down the lights.

279
00:17:36,889 --> 00:17:40,558
She was the one that wanted to rent
Logan's Run...

280
00:17:40,726 --> 00:17:43,728
...the sexiest movie ever.

281
00:17:47,191 --> 00:17:49,192
I know that look.

282
00:17:49,359 --> 00:17:53,738
Forget it. I want it. She wants it.

283
00:17:53,906 --> 00:17:55,948
I'm going in.

284
00:18:03,373 --> 00:18:04,707
[CASSIE YELPS]

285
00:18:05,334 --> 00:18:06,959
What the hell are you doing?

286
00:18:08,796 --> 00:18:10,880
ROSS:
Say something clever.

287
00:18:12,925 --> 00:18:15,134
Okay, doesn't have to be clever.

288
00:18:15,302 --> 00:18:19,222
Just has to be words. Say some words.

289
00:18:20,015 --> 00:18:23,184
Any words will do.

290
00:18:24,686 --> 00:18:27,396
Oh, my God, this is the longest...

291
00:18:27,564 --> 00:18:32,527
...that anyone has not talked ever!

292
00:18:33,946 --> 00:18:36,572
There is nothing you could say
to make this worse...

293
00:18:36,740 --> 00:18:40,451
...so just say something!

294
00:18:42,204 --> 00:18:46,040
[STAMMERS]
I haven't had sex in a very long time.

295
00:18:49,586 --> 00:18:52,380
ROSS: Yeah, you really
shouldn't have said anything.

296
00:18:55,175 --> 00:18:57,343
Phoebe? Rachel? It's Monica.

297
00:18:57,511 --> 00:19:01,806
I wonder what you could possibly
need me for on such short notice?

298
00:19:05,060 --> 00:19:06,310
Oh.

299
00:19:06,478 --> 00:19:10,273
- Oh, Monica. We are so sorry.
- For what?

300
00:19:10,440 --> 00:19:14,318
First, for forgetting to
throw you a bridal shower.

301
00:19:14,486 --> 00:19:16,946
Then, forgetting to invite you to it.

302
00:19:19,366 --> 00:19:20,867
You already had it?

303
00:19:21,034 --> 00:19:24,370
We called everyone in your phone book.
A bunch of people came.

304
00:19:24,538 --> 00:19:27,915
It took us so long to get you here
that they had to leave.

305
00:19:28,750 --> 00:19:33,087
We wanted to throw you a big surprise
and a great shower.

306
00:19:33,255 --> 00:19:35,173
Now you don't have either.

307
00:19:35,340 --> 00:19:36,799
- We ruined everything.
- Ugh.

308
00:19:36,967 --> 00:19:41,804
No, wait a minute, that's not true.
What you did was really sweet.

309
00:19:41,972 --> 00:19:45,474
- It kind of works out for the best, heh.
- What do you mean?

310
00:19:45,642 --> 00:19:50,229
Now I get to spend my shower
with the only people I really love.

311
00:19:50,397 --> 00:19:55,234
I get all those presents without
talking to people I don't even like!

312
00:20:01,116 --> 00:20:03,826
- Surprise.
- Surprise, Monica.

313
00:20:09,583 --> 00:20:12,835
What's cool is, the character
is from Naples, right?

314
00:20:13,003 --> 00:20:15,838
DIRECTOR: Yeah.
- My whole family's from Naples.

315
00:20:16,006 --> 00:20:21,260
That's great. Okay. I've heard
everything I need to hear...

316
00:20:21,428 --> 00:20:23,930
We just need to, uh...

317
00:20:24,598 --> 00:20:26,015
Leslie?

318
00:20:26,183 --> 00:20:30,269
- Uh, Joey, this is the awkward part.
- Oh, hey, right. Not a problem.

319
00:20:30,437 --> 00:20:33,189
I totally understand you need to...

320
00:20:33,357 --> 00:20:36,984
...make sure I don't have any
horrible scars or tattoos.

321
00:20:37,152 --> 00:20:38,527
Don't you worry.

322
00:20:39,196 --> 00:20:41,656
I have nothing to hide.

323
00:20:42,950 --> 00:20:45,910
So, there you go. That's me.

324
00:20:46,078 --> 00:20:48,704
One hundred-percent natural.

325
00:20:48,872 --> 00:20:50,206
[THUD]

326
00:21:04,137 --> 00:21:07,640
I tell you, that has never
happened before.

327
00:21:14,147 --> 00:21:16,482
Cassie, are you finding
everything okay?

328
00:21:16,650 --> 00:21:19,443
CASSIE: Yeah. Thank you so much
for letting me stay here.

329
00:21:19,611 --> 00:21:21,821
Oh, it's no problem. I've...

330
00:21:40,007 --> 00:21:41,048
What?

331
00:21:41,633 --> 00:21:44,385
PHOEBE:
Say something. Say anything.

332
00:21:44,678 --> 00:21:47,430
Ask her out! She's not your cousin!

333
00:21:52,978 --> 00:21:54,979
[English - US - SDH]