1
00:00:03,504 --> 00:00:05,381
God, you're beautiful.

2
00:00:06,090 --> 00:00:08,384
Why are we fighting this?

3
00:00:08,718 --> 00:00:12,722
You know you want it to happen
as much as I do.

4
00:00:12,888 --> 00:00:16,976
I want you. I need you.

5
00:00:19,437 --> 00:00:21,981
Let me make love to you.

6
00:00:22,148 --> 00:00:24,984
I don't wanna stand in the way
of, uh, true love or anything...

7
00:00:25,151 --> 00:00:28,487
...but I think a cantaloupe
might hurt less.

8
00:00:28,654 --> 00:00:31,073
No, I'm, uh, rehearsing my lines.

9
00:00:31,240 --> 00:00:34,035
They're giving me a romantic story
on Days of our Lives.

10
00:00:34,243 --> 00:00:37,955
It's the first time my character's got one.
I'm nervous. I want it to be good.

11
00:00:38,122 --> 00:00:42,626
Wow, I haven't seen you this worked-up
since you did that dog-food commercial...

12
00:00:42,793 --> 00:00:47,006
...and you thought you were gonna be
with a real talking dog.

13
00:00:47,173 --> 00:00:49,759
Yeah, that was a disappointment.

14
00:00:49,925 --> 00:00:53,846
Ooh, hey, you wanna, uh, come down
to the set and tell me if I'm doing okay?

15
00:00:54,055 --> 00:00:55,639
- Are you serious?
- Yeah.

16
00:00:55,848 --> 00:00:58,642
You just have to promise not
to get thrown out again.

17
00:00:58,809 --> 00:01:01,562
- That was an honest mistake.
- Right.

18
00:01:01,729 --> 00:01:06,150
"Oh, my God. Is this the men's room?
I feel so foolish.

19
00:01:06,317 --> 00:01:10,154
Have you always known
you wanted to be an actor?"

20
00:01:11,197 --> 00:01:14,366
Yeah, that was an awesome day.

21
00:01:52,488 --> 00:01:55,324
- Hey!
ROSS <i>&</i> PHOEBE: Hey.

22
00:01:55,491 --> 00:01:58,953
You guys wanna come eat dinner
at the restaurant in the next few weeks?

23
00:01:59,161 --> 00:02:00,412
- Sure!
- I'd love to.

24
00:02:00,663 --> 00:02:01,872
Well, you can't.

25
00:02:03,207 --> 00:02:06,752
- We're booked solid for the next month.
- Well, I can't give you a massage...

26
00:02:06,919 --> 00:02:10,381
...because my license
has been revoked again.

27
00:02:10,548 --> 00:02:14,135
- Phoebe, what happened?
- Well, it was an accident, you know.

28
00:02:14,301 --> 00:02:17,721
It's a lot of oil and sometimes
the hand just slips.

29
00:02:19,515 --> 00:02:22,309
Have I got a surprise for you.
Pack your bags.

30
00:02:22,476 --> 00:02:26,897
Oh, no. You guys aren't supposed
to get divorced for seven years.

31
00:02:28,482 --> 00:02:31,735
What? No, I'm taking Monica
to a romantic inn in Vermont.

32
00:02:31,902 --> 00:02:37,491
Oh, good. Okay, good for you.
Trying to recapture the magic.

33
00:02:38,868 --> 00:02:41,203
- So can you get out of work?
- Honey, I can't.

34
00:02:41,370 --> 00:02:45,124
- Things are crazy at the restaurant.
- You're really that busy?

35
00:02:45,332 --> 00:02:48,002
Yeah. I'm sorry, I really am.

36
00:02:48,169 --> 00:02:51,505
CHANDLER: That's okay.
I'll just, uh, try and reschedule.

37
00:02:52,965 --> 00:02:56,093
Hi, this is Chandler Bing.
I made a reservation there...

38
00:02:56,260 --> 00:02:58,053
...and I need to change it.

39
00:02:58,846 --> 00:03:02,933
What do you mean it's nonrefundable?
Well, can I just come some other time?

40
00:03:04,018 --> 00:03:05,603
Can't you make an exception?

41
00:03:05,811 --> 00:03:08,606
Tell them I'm a chef
at a big New York restaurant.

42
00:03:08,814 --> 00:03:13,235
Tell them that in two weeks, I will once
again be a masseuse in good standing.

43
00:03:14,612 --> 00:03:18,282
Look, this is ridiculous.
I'm not paying for that room, okay?

44
00:03:18,449 --> 00:03:21,327
Well, thank you very much.

45
00:03:21,744 --> 00:03:24,496
Yeah, I'm going to Vermont.

46
00:03:24,663 --> 00:03:28,584
- Don't worry, use your travel insurance.
- I don't have travel insurance.

47
00:03:28,792 --> 00:03:33,214
Well, this is what happens
when people live on the edge.

48
00:03:33,422 --> 00:03:34,590
Why don't you take Ross?

49
00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:40,012
Heh. Don't you think that'll be a little weird?
I mean, two guys in a romantic inn?

50
00:03:40,304 --> 00:03:44,099
- No, not if the room has two beds.
- I guess.

51
00:03:44,266 --> 00:03:48,187
It still seems a little--
"Moonlight boat ride"?

52
00:03:52,983 --> 00:03:55,945
Joey, is this the bed
where Olivia lost her virginity?

53
00:03:56,153 --> 00:03:58,864
I don't know,
but one of the extras sure did.

54
00:03:59,031 --> 00:04:02,493
Listen, Rach. Thanks again
for coming down to watch my scenes.

55
00:04:02,701 --> 00:04:06,205
Please, honey. Just the fact that you
want me here to support you, I'm--

56
00:04:06,372 --> 00:04:11,210
Oh, my God. Is that Christian Saunders?
He is so gorgeous!

57
00:04:11,418 --> 00:04:14,088
And also, so gay.

58
00:04:14,255 --> 00:04:18,175
Well, in my head,
he's done some pretty not-gay stuff.

59
00:04:18,384 --> 00:04:22,763
Well, at the Christmas party,
him and Santa did some definitely-gay stuff.

60
00:04:22,930 --> 00:04:24,890
Joey? Joey, we're ready for you.

61
00:04:25,057 --> 00:04:27,351
RACHEL: Oh. Ahem.
JOEY: Okay. All right, wish me luck.

62
00:04:27,518 --> 00:04:31,230
Okay. Not that you need it, but good--
God! Is that Chase Lassiter?

63
00:04:31,563 --> 00:04:34,650
- He's straight, right?
- Rash, if you weren't here wondering...

64
00:04:34,817 --> 00:04:38,362
...if these guys were gay,
I don't know if I could do this.

65
00:04:38,570 --> 00:04:42,825
- I'm sorry, you're right. I'm sorry. Good luck.
MAN: On a bell, please.

66
00:04:42,992 --> 00:04:44,034
[BUZZER BUZZES]

67
00:04:44,201 --> 00:04:45,494
Quietly.

68
00:04:45,661 --> 00:04:47,371
And action!

69
00:04:47,538 --> 00:04:48,580
[DRAMATIC MUSIC
PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS]

70
00:04:48,747 --> 00:04:50,499
OLMA:
Drake, what are you doing here?

71
00:04:50,666 --> 00:04:52,710
Stopping you from marrying
the wrong man...

72
00:04:52,876 --> 00:04:54,962
...and making the biggest
mistake of your life.

73
00:04:55,170 --> 00:04:57,298
- Get out.
- You don't love him.

74
00:04:57,506 --> 00:04:59,049
What do you know about love?

75
00:04:59,258 --> 00:05:02,011
I know what I felt that night
when we kissed under the bridge.

76
00:05:02,219 --> 00:05:05,556
OLMA: That kiss never happened.
- Well, what about this one?

77
00:05:05,723 --> 00:05:07,516
[RACHEL GASPS]

78
00:05:07,975 --> 00:05:10,769
OLMA:
Now, I told you to get out.

79
00:05:10,936 --> 00:05:12,896
JOEY [AS DRAKE]:
Fine, I'll go.

80
00:05:13,814 --> 00:05:15,649
But let me ask you one question.

81
00:05:15,816 --> 00:05:20,070
- You look real familiar. Have we--?
- Shh! He's asking her a question.

82
00:05:20,988 --> 00:05:24,992
Can you live the rest of your life never
knowing what we could have been?

83
00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:28,162
- I don't have a choice.
- Yes, you do.

84
00:05:28,329 --> 00:05:32,916
Yes, you do. I'm the one who doesn't
have a choice because I...

85
00:05:33,083 --> 00:05:36,170
Because I can't stop loving you.

86
00:05:36,337 --> 00:05:40,215
OLMA: Don't say that.
JOEY [AS DRAKE]: Tell me to stop.

87
00:05:40,507 --> 00:05:42,593
Just"

88
00:05:43,135 --> 00:05:46,263
...tell me to stop.

89
00:05:46,472 --> 00:05:49,224
MAN: Cut!
- No!

90
00:05:50,351 --> 00:05:53,854
Or, cut. You know, that's your call.

91
00:05:55,731 --> 00:05:57,733
- Everything was delicious.
- Thank you.

92
00:05:57,900 --> 00:06:00,444
It was. The duck in particular
was superb.

93
00:06:00,611 --> 00:06:02,946
Thank you.

94
00:06:05,657 --> 00:06:07,993
You haven't said anything.

95
00:06:08,202 --> 00:06:10,704
Actually, I do have one small complaint.

96
00:06:10,871 --> 00:06:15,501
Oh, well, please, I welcome criticism.

97
00:06:16,168 --> 00:06:19,463
The musician right outside the restaurant
is kind of a mood killer.

98
00:06:19,671 --> 00:06:20,756
What musician?

99
00:06:21,006 --> 00:06:23,926
<i>[SINGING]
And there's</i> a <i>country called Argentina</i>

100
00:06:24,093 --> 00:06:26,720
<i>It's a place I've never seen</i>

101
00:06:26,887 --> 00:06:33,185
<i>But I'm told for 50 pesos
You can buy a human spleen</i>

102
00:06:33,352 --> 00:06:37,231
<i>Human spleen</i>

103
00:06:37,398 --> 00:06:38,607
<i>Olé!</i>

104
00:06:40,734 --> 00:06:42,152
What are you doing here?

105
00:06:42,361 --> 00:06:46,365
You said you had customers lined up
in the street, so I'm here to entertain.

106
00:06:46,532 --> 00:06:49,326
- Great.
- Yeah, it really has been great too.

107
00:06:49,535 --> 00:06:51,453
They must have seen me
play before...

108
00:06:51,620 --> 00:06:54,081
...because they requested
a bunch of my songs.

109
00:06:54,248 --> 00:06:56,625
Yeah, "You Suck"...

110
00:06:56,792 --> 00:06:58,710
...and, um, "Shut Up and Go Home."

111
00:07:00,546 --> 00:07:02,005
- Listen, Phoebe.
- Yeah.

112
00:07:02,172 --> 00:07:05,050
You know how much
I love listening to your music...

113
00:07:05,217 --> 00:07:08,095
-...but...
- But what?

114
00:07:08,262 --> 00:07:13,183
Um, this is kind of a classy place.

115
00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:14,893
Okay, say no more.

116
00:07:15,102 --> 00:07:19,064
<i>[SINGING] It wasn't just that she was fat
The woman smelled like garbage</i>

117
00:07:19,231 --> 00:07:20,274
[IN NORMAL VOICE]
Everyone!

118
00:07:20,441 --> 00:07:25,404
<i>[SINGING] It wasn't just that she was fat
The woman smelled like garbage</i>

119
00:07:25,863 --> 00:07:27,531
[IN NORMAL VOICE]
Classy, huh?

120
00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:35,080
Hi, Chandler Bing. I have a reservation.

121
00:07:35,247 --> 00:07:38,125
Welcome to the Chestnut Inn.
Where are you joining us from?

122
00:07:38,333 --> 00:07:41,336
- New York.
- The Big Apple.

123
00:07:41,503 --> 00:07:45,549
He's wound up. We had to stop at every
maple-candy stand on the way here.

124
00:07:45,716 --> 00:07:48,969
I ate all my gifts for everybody.

125
00:07:50,471 --> 00:07:53,724
I'm sorry, there's no record
of your reservation in the computer.

126
00:07:53,932 --> 00:07:58,729
- That's impossible. Check again, please.
- Check again, please.

127
00:07:59,688 --> 00:08:03,317
- I'm sorry, it's not here.
- It's not there.

128
00:08:03,484 --> 00:08:07,029
Let me get this straight.
I called to try to cancel my reservation...

129
00:08:07,196 --> 00:08:11,033
...was told it's not refundable.
We drove six hours all the way up here...

130
00:08:11,200 --> 00:08:14,369
-...and now we don't have a reservation?
- I don't know what to say.

131
00:08:14,578 --> 00:08:16,788
She doesn't know what to say.

132
00:08:16,955 --> 00:08:19,082
Just give us
the cheapest room you have.

133
00:08:19,291 --> 00:08:23,295
The only thing we have available
is our deluxe suite. The rate is $600.

134
00:08:23,504 --> 00:08:25,923
- That's insane.
- It's totally insane.

135
00:08:26,089 --> 00:08:30,135
Let's drive home. We'll hit all the
maple-candy stores on the way back...

136
00:08:30,302 --> 00:08:36,350
...and if they're closed, then maybe we'll
tap a tree and make some ourselves.

137
00:08:36,517 --> 00:08:40,604
Does that room have a closet
I can lock him in?

138
00:08:41,230 --> 00:08:44,316
- We'll take it.
- Great.

139
00:08:44,525 --> 00:08:47,486
- They are totally ripping us off!
- Dude, don't worry about it.

140
00:08:47,653 --> 00:08:51,740
I know how to make your money back.
This is a nice hotel. Plenty of amenities.

141
00:08:51,907 --> 00:08:56,119
We just load up on those.
Like those apples. Instead of taking one...

142
00:08:56,286 --> 00:08:59,122
...um, I take six.

143
00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:03,418
Great. At $100 an apple, we're there.

144
00:09:03,585 --> 00:09:07,881
Come on, you get the idea. You know,
we'll make our money back in no time.

145
00:09:08,090 --> 00:09:12,928
- Dude, you're shaking.
- It's the sugar. Could you hold the apple?

146
00:09:17,724 --> 00:09:19,142
RACHEL: Hi.
- Hey.

147
00:09:19,309 --> 00:09:24,106
Joey, I got to tell you, I have been
thinking all day about that scene you did.

148
00:09:24,273 --> 00:09:26,358
- You were amazing.
- Oh.

149
00:09:26,650 --> 00:09:29,903
You know, the writing was good.
And the director's good.

150
00:09:30,070 --> 00:09:32,197
And my costar's good.

151
00:09:32,364 --> 00:09:34,408
But they're not as good as me!

152
00:09:35,909 --> 00:09:38,036
You have to tell me
what happens tomorrow.

153
00:09:38,245 --> 00:09:41,039
I'm going over the script now.
Wanna read lines with me?

154
00:09:41,206 --> 00:09:44,668
Me? Oh, I'm not an actress.

155
00:09:44,876 --> 00:09:47,296
- I can ask Monica.
- Screw her! That part is mine!

156
00:09:47,504 --> 00:09:48,714
JOEY:
Right.

157
00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:51,675
Okay, so, uh, just from the top
of the page right here.

158
00:09:51,842 --> 00:09:53,427
Okay.

159
00:09:53,594 --> 00:09:54,636
[SIGHS]

160
00:09:56,513 --> 00:09:59,850
Hello, Drake.
I'm surprised to see you here.

161
00:10:00,058 --> 00:10:03,353
- I can't believe you married him.
- Well, what choice did I have?

162
00:10:03,520 --> 00:10:06,815
He was keeping my sister in a dungeon.

163
00:10:09,443 --> 00:10:12,696
So, what about us?
Everything we feel for each other?

164
00:10:12,904 --> 00:10:15,365
It's over. You have to accept that.

165
00:10:15,532 --> 00:10:20,037
How can I, knowing I'll never
hold you in my arms again...

166
00:10:20,203 --> 00:10:24,249
...or touch your skin or feel your lips...

167
00:10:24,833 --> 00:10:27,961
...knowing I'll never make love to you?

168
00:10:28,128 --> 00:10:31,131
How can I accept
that I can never kiss you again...

169
00:10:31,298 --> 00:10:34,301
...when it's all I can do not
to kiss you right now?

170
00:10:37,638 --> 00:10:38,805
Kiss me.

171
00:10:40,057 --> 00:10:41,767
What?

172
00:10:42,559 --> 00:10:43,894
Kiss me.

173
00:10:44,102 --> 00:10:49,483
- Uh, Rach, it doesn't say that.
- No, I'm saying it.

174
00:10:49,650 --> 00:10:52,486
- But--
- Just don't talk.

175
00:10:54,112 --> 00:10:55,697
[GASPS]

176
00:10:59,618 --> 00:11:01,578
Well, that's new.

177
00:11:10,671 --> 00:11:14,132
Hi, this is Ross Geller in suite 206.

178
00:11:14,341 --> 00:11:16,093
Um, I've forgotten a couple of things.

179
00:11:16,259 --> 00:11:20,555
Could you have some complimentary
toiletries sent up to my room?

180
00:11:20,722 --> 00:11:24,518
Thank you.
Okay, a toothbrush, toothpaste...

181
00:11:24,685 --> 00:11:30,732
...razor, mouthwash, deodorant, floss,
Band-Aids, shaving cream, after shave.

182
00:11:30,899 --> 00:11:32,526
And I feel like I'm forgetting something.

183
00:11:32,693 --> 00:11:37,781
Um, is there anything else you have
that I haven't asked for already?

184
00:11:38,073 --> 00:11:41,284
Yeah, go ahead,
send up some tampons.

185
00:11:43,704 --> 00:11:45,330
- What'd you get?
- USA Today.

186
00:11:45,497 --> 00:11:47,499
Nice. Put it with the others.

187
00:11:47,749 --> 00:11:51,712
And I also got two more apples.

188
00:11:51,920 --> 00:11:53,839
We're four short of a bushel!

189
00:11:54,798 --> 00:11:58,844
God, I feel so alive.
I love being in the country!

190
00:11:59,010 --> 00:12:01,346
Also, got these great
salt and pepper shakers...

191
00:12:01,513 --> 00:12:03,807
-...from the restaurant.
- That's not cool.

192
00:12:05,016 --> 00:12:07,728
Dude, none of this is cool.

193
00:12:08,311 --> 00:12:11,898
Look, Chandler, you have to find
the line between stealing...

194
00:12:12,065 --> 00:12:14,359
...and taking what the hotel owes you.

195
00:12:14,526 --> 00:12:17,362
For example: a hair dryer, no, no, no.

196
00:12:17,571 --> 00:12:20,657
But shampoos and conditioners,
yes,yes,yes.

197
00:12:21,950 --> 00:12:25,412
Now, the salt shaker is off limits. Ah.

198
00:12:25,579 --> 00:12:29,499
But the salt...

199
00:12:29,666 --> 00:12:32,419
I wish I'd thought this through.

200
00:12:32,586 --> 00:12:36,631
I think I get what you mean, though.
Like, the lamp is the hotel's...

201
00:12:36,798 --> 00:12:39,968
...but the bulbs--
Oh, you already got that.

202
00:12:40,177 --> 00:12:43,096
Not my first time in a hotel, my friend.

203
00:12:43,263 --> 00:12:46,016
- Okay, uh, how about this?
- No, no, no.

204
00:12:46,224 --> 00:12:50,687
- You can't take the remote control.
- Yes, but the batteries.

205
00:12:55,776 --> 00:12:57,444
Thank you. Thank you very much.

206
00:12:57,652 --> 00:13:01,072
- Ooh! Let's celebrate with some maple candy.
- No!

207
00:13:02,491 --> 00:13:05,869
At least tell me where you hid it.

208
00:13:09,498 --> 00:13:12,417
- Can I ask you a question?
- Yeah.

209
00:13:12,709 --> 00:13:15,712
Have you ever had any...

210
00:13:15,879 --> 00:13:20,425
...weird, romantic dreams?

211
00:13:21,676 --> 00:13:23,261
Hmm, let me think.

212
00:13:23,470 --> 00:13:28,725
Oh. When I was younger, I used to dream
that I got married to Mayor McCheese.

213
00:13:28,892 --> 00:13:31,978
And on our wedding night,
I ate his head.

214
00:13:33,605 --> 00:13:35,941
Okay.

215
00:13:36,107 --> 00:13:38,568
Well, this is like that...

216
00:13:38,735 --> 00:13:40,654
...in no way.

217
00:13:40,821 --> 00:13:44,783
I had a dream last night
that I wanted to kiss Joey.

218
00:13:44,950 --> 00:13:47,911
Wow! You mean like
"kiss him" kiss him?

219
00:13:48,078 --> 00:13:51,414
Oh, yeah.
I mean, it was pretty intense.

220
00:13:51,623 --> 00:13:53,750
- What brought that on?
- I don't know.

221
00:13:53,959 --> 00:13:56,962
Maybe it had to do with the fact
I saw him do a love scene.

222
00:13:57,170 --> 00:13:59,464
- A love scene? With who?
- Olivia.

223
00:13:59,673 --> 00:14:02,968
Olivia?
I thought she was marrying Connor?

224
00:14:03,134 --> 00:14:06,263
Oh, right. Real life more important.

225
00:14:06,471 --> 00:14:09,891
- You think my dream means anything?
- I don't know.

226
00:14:10,100 --> 00:14:14,521
I mean, you saw him do a love scene.
Maybe you don't have a thing for Joey.

227
00:14:14,688 --> 00:14:17,732
Maybe you have a thing for Drake.

228
00:14:17,941 --> 00:14:19,651
Huh...

229
00:14:20,110 --> 00:14:24,531
Well, it was Joey reading
Drake's lines in the dream.

230
00:14:24,739 --> 00:14:28,493
Of course it was.
Trust me, when it comes to psychology...

231
00:14:28,660 --> 00:14:31,913
...I know what I'm talking about.

232
00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:36,251
- I took two psych classes in college.
- You took the same class twice.

233
00:14:36,459 --> 00:14:39,004
- It was hard!
- I know.

234
00:14:39,671 --> 00:14:42,007
- Hey.
RACHEL & MONICA: Hi.

235
00:14:42,173 --> 00:14:47,137
Here, Monica, look what I got to wear
when I play at your restaurant.

236
00:14:50,724 --> 00:14:53,727
Ah. Ah. Wait.

237
00:14:55,186 --> 00:15:00,025
Right? I think this might even class up
"The Ballad of the Uncircumcised Man."

238
00:15:01,860 --> 00:15:04,487
Um, Phoebe...

239
00:15:04,654 --> 00:15:07,616
...maybe I wasn't clear before.

240
00:15:07,782 --> 00:15:11,286
I really love listening
to your music here.

241
00:15:11,453 --> 00:15:14,331
But my restaurant,
it's sort of an upscale place.

242
00:15:14,539 --> 00:15:19,294
Right, yeah, okay. I'll ask the butler
to fetch my diamonds out of the vault.

243
00:15:19,461 --> 00:15:22,339
Phoebe, it's not what you wear.

244
00:15:22,505 --> 00:15:25,675
It's sort of your songs.

245
00:15:25,842 --> 00:15:28,887
I just don't think you should play
at the restaurant anymore.

246
00:15:29,930 --> 00:15:34,601
Oh. Okay. Fine, <i>I'll</i> just--

247
00:15:34,768 --> 00:15:37,520
I'll take the hat back.

248
00:15:39,397 --> 00:15:41,524
There.

249
00:15:46,821 --> 00:15:49,950
Hey, so you guys, the funniest
thing happened at work the--

250
00:15:50,158 --> 00:15:52,243
My songs aren't good enough
for your restaurant?

251
00:15:52,452 --> 00:15:55,038
Okay, we're still on that.

252
00:15:55,246 --> 00:15:58,750
- I didn't say they weren't good enough.
- Then what's wrong with them?

253
00:15:58,917 --> 00:16:02,003
What, they don't go with your
tiny portions of pretentious food?

254
00:16:02,212 --> 00:16:05,465
- Tiny portions?
- Yeah, well, um, "Excuse me.

255
00:16:05,632 --> 00:16:10,845
I ordered the smoked salmon appetizer,
but I can't see it. I can't see it."

256
00:16:12,973 --> 00:16:16,935
- Phoebe, it's not about quantity.
- Well, it's not about quality.

257
00:16:17,227 --> 00:16:20,188
Oh, really?
You wanna talk about quality?

258
00:16:20,438 --> 00:16:24,734
Have you ever heard of a "key"?
It's what some people sing in.

259
00:16:24,943 --> 00:16:28,905
Well, at least all my songs
don't taste like garlic.

260
00:16:29,114 --> 00:16:31,616
Yeah, there are other
ingredients, Monica.

261
00:16:32,659 --> 00:16:34,244
So that's what we're doing.

262
00:16:34,411 --> 00:16:37,414
When I'm in a coffeehouse bopping
along to one of your songs...

263
00:16:37,580 --> 00:16:41,292
-...I'm wearing earplugs.
- Earplugs or cloves of garlic?

264
00:16:43,253 --> 00:16:45,422
You know what?
I take back what I said before.

265
00:16:45,588 --> 00:16:49,342
Keep playing at the restaurant, because
with your music driving people inside...

266
00:16:49,509 --> 00:16:51,386
...my bar sales
have gone up like crazy.

267
00:16:51,553 --> 00:16:54,556
What are people having,
the garlic martini?

268
00:16:57,517 --> 00:16:59,811
Here's your bill.
We hope you enjoyed your stay.

269
00:17:00,020 --> 00:17:03,815
Oh, we did.
And you still have all your lamps.

270
00:17:05,817 --> 00:17:09,571
- I didn't factor in the room tax.
- Dude, don't worry about it.

271
00:17:09,738 --> 00:17:14,826
I found an unattended maid's cart.
We're way ahead of the game.

272
00:17:14,993 --> 00:17:17,287
- Oh, my God.
- What?

273
00:17:17,454 --> 00:17:20,081
There's something new in the bowl.

274
00:17:20,248 --> 00:17:25,045
- Look, we have enough. Just walk away.
- No, but I want the pine cones.

275
00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:29,674
- There's a forest right outside.
- It's not the same.

276
00:17:29,883 --> 00:17:32,427
Okay, go quick.

277
00:17:34,262 --> 00:17:36,681
[CAWING]

278
00:17:39,350 --> 00:17:42,145
Thank you for a delightful stay.

279
00:17:50,653 --> 00:17:53,615
MY maple candy!

280
00:17:56,910 --> 00:18:00,330
<i>[SINGING] The food here at Javu
Will kill you</i>

281
00:18:00,538 --> 00:18:04,084
<i>The food here at Javu
Will kill you</i>

282
00:18:04,250 --> 00:18:09,130
It's just you. I thought someone was
swinging a bag of cats against the wall.

283
00:18:09,464 --> 00:18:14,010
You'd better get back in that kitchen.
The garlic's not gonna overuse itself.

284
00:18:14,177 --> 00:18:16,721
- Okay, you have to stop playing now.
- Why?

285
00:18:16,888 --> 00:18:19,182
The only person my playing
is bothering is you.

286
00:18:19,349 --> 00:18:24,562
- Oh, yeah? Let's settle this. Come on.
- Get your garlic peelers off me.

287
00:18:25,230 --> 00:18:27,148
Excuse me? Excuse me?

288
00:18:27,315 --> 00:18:30,860
Hi, I'm Monica Geller.
I'm the head chef here.

289
00:18:31,486 --> 00:18:35,031
Okay, I was actually expecting
a little applause there, but whatever.

290
00:18:35,240 --> 00:18:37,992
Quick question.
By a show of hands...

291
00:18:38,159 --> 00:18:42,372
...how many of you were bothered
by this woman's singing outside?

292
00:18:43,081 --> 00:18:46,835
Okay, okay. How many of you
enjoyed the music outside?

293
00:18:48,461 --> 00:18:49,504
Ha!

294
00:18:49,671 --> 00:18:52,799
Let me ask you this question.
How many thought the music was fine...

295
00:18:52,966 --> 00:18:56,261
...but not in keeping with the tone
of the restaurant?

296
00:18:56,427 --> 00:19:02,350
Who identified this restaurant's tone
as "pretentious-comma-garlicky"?

297
00:19:02,517 --> 00:19:08,648
Okay, who thinks the food is delicious
and a little pretension never hurt anyone?

298
00:19:09,399 --> 00:19:12,902
Okay, well, all right, who thinks
the food is fine, the music was fine...

299
00:19:13,069 --> 00:19:16,573
...but your evening was ruined
by this incessant poll-taking?

300
00:19:20,243 --> 00:19:22,704
Excuse us.

301
00:19:25,206 --> 00:19:27,500
All right, here's a question.

302
00:19:27,667 --> 00:19:31,629
Uh, who was so worried about
her restaurant being fancy...

303
00:19:31,796 --> 00:19:35,008
...that she made a big deal about
her friend playing her music...

304
00:19:35,175 --> 00:19:38,469
...and feels really bad about it now?

305
00:19:39,512 --> 00:19:42,098
Well, who was so stupid
and stubborn...

306
00:19:42,265 --> 00:19:44,684
...that she lashed out
against her friend's cooking...

307
00:19:44,851 --> 00:19:48,188
...which she actually thinks
is pretty great?

308
00:19:48,396 --> 00:19:51,316
- I'm sorry.
- I'm sorry too.

309
00:19:51,608 --> 00:19:54,569
Hey, you wanna stick around
and I'll whip you up some dinner?

310
00:19:54,777 --> 00:19:59,490
Yeah, as long as it's free.
The food here is ridiculously overpr--

311
00:20:02,118 --> 00:20:06,998
Who hopes the hand-raising thing is still
cute enough that you won't hate me?

312
00:20:09,459 --> 00:20:11,294
_H6Y-
_H6Y-

313
00:20:12,670 --> 00:20:17,383
Joey, do you have peanut butter
on the back of your head?

314
00:20:19,761 --> 00:20:23,014
Oh, man. I thought I got it all.

315
00:20:24,432 --> 00:20:25,934
How...?

316
00:20:26,100 --> 00:20:27,894
How?

317
00:20:28,144 --> 00:20:30,605
I was making a peanut butter
smoothie, right?

318
00:20:30,772 --> 00:20:34,943
I couldn't find this little plastic thingy
that goes in the top of the blender.

319
00:20:35,109 --> 00:20:39,280
And I thought, "Well, you know,
how important can that be?" Right?

320
00:20:39,864 --> 00:20:41,616
Turns out, very.

321
00:20:43,409 --> 00:20:45,328
Wow, definitely just Drake.

322
00:20:45,954 --> 00:20:48,206
- What?
- How's it going with Drake?

323
00:20:48,456 --> 00:20:51,668
- I don't think it's going very well.
- What?

324
00:20:51,876 --> 00:20:53,711
That scene I saw was so good.

325
00:20:53,920 --> 00:20:58,549
Well, I'm feeling really insecure
about the one we're shooting tomorrow.

326
00:20:58,841 --> 00:21:02,971
Is this that thing you do when you say
you're bad so I'll give you a compliment?

327
00:21:03,304 --> 00:21:05,306
A little.

328
00:21:05,473 --> 00:21:11,854
No, I really am worried. I have to make it
convincing that I'm in love with Olivia.

329
00:21:12,021 --> 00:21:15,024
- So?
- So I've never played that.

330
00:21:15,233 --> 00:21:19,028
Oh, honey, it can't be that hard.
I mean, you've been in love before.

331
00:21:19,737 --> 00:21:23,074
Uh, well, just once...

332
00:21:23,241 --> 00:21:25,535
...with you.

333
00:21:27,036 --> 00:21:29,205
Okay. Well, this could be
a little awkward.

334
00:21:29,372 --> 00:21:31,874
I'm just gonna blow past it.

335
00:21:32,041 --> 00:21:35,086
Well, look, can't you just use
that method-actor thing...

336
00:21:35,295 --> 00:21:40,174
...where you use your real-life memories
to help you in your performance?

337
00:21:40,341 --> 00:21:42,719
What the hell are you talking about?

338
00:21:45,179 --> 00:21:51,060
All right, look, just, um, try to remember
how you felt when you were in love...

339
00:21:51,227 --> 00:21:54,105
...and think about that
when you're playing the scene.

340
00:21:54,272 --> 00:21:55,815
Oh.

341
00:21:56,983 --> 00:22:00,278
Okay. Yeah, I think I can do that.

342
00:22:00,445 --> 00:22:03,323
Yeah. Okay, there's this
party scene coming up.

343
00:22:03,489 --> 00:22:05,950
- Uh-huh.
- And Olivia and her husband are there...

344
00:22:06,159 --> 00:22:11,331
...and all Drake wants to do is
grab her and kiss her, but he can't.

345
00:22:11,497 --> 00:22:16,044
That makes me think about those times
I wanted to grab you and kiss you...

346
00:22:16,210 --> 00:22:19,505
...but you didn't know, so I would
just pretend everything was cool...

347
00:22:19,672 --> 00:22:21,716
...but really it was killing me.

348
00:22:23,718 --> 00:22:27,722
Joey, you never
talked about that before.

349
00:22:27,972 --> 00:22:29,557
Well...

350
00:22:29,849 --> 00:22:32,852
Hey, you know what else I could use?

351
00:22:33,019 --> 00:22:36,356
There's this scene where Drake
sneaks into Olivia's bedroom...

352
00:22:36,522 --> 00:22:40,902
...and she doesn't know he's there,
which never happened with us.

353
00:22:42,278 --> 00:22:47,241
I mean, he knows he shouldn't be there,
but he just wants to look at her.

354
00:22:48,659 --> 00:22:50,119
You know?

355
00:22:50,286 --> 00:22:55,291
And I remember all those mornings
before you even put on your makeup...

356
00:22:55,458 --> 00:23:00,838
...when I would think to myself,
"My God, she is beautiful."

357
00:23:02,548 --> 00:23:07,595
And it hurt so much because I knew
I could never tell you.

358
00:23:10,306 --> 00:23:15,311
But it was worth it just to be there
looking at you.

359
00:23:20,942 --> 00:23:22,819
Thanks, dude. This is great!

360
00:23:33,955 --> 00:23:36,249
I got you something from Vermont.

361
00:23:36,457 --> 00:23:38,626
Besides tampons and salt?

362
00:23:40,211 --> 00:23:41,921
Oh, my God.

363
00:23:42,130 --> 00:23:45,716
Maple candy. That's so sweet of you.

364
00:23:46,759 --> 00:23:48,719
That's weird, it's empty.

365
00:23:49,095 --> 00:23:54,350
Hi, you guys. What's going on?
You guys wanna hang out, or...?

366
00:24:00,690 --> 00:24:02,525
Do you guys hear a buzzing?

367
00:24:06,821 --> 00:24:08,823
[English - US - SDH]