1 00:00:07,383 --> 00:00:10,344 Monica? Hey, can I borrow the Porsche? 2 00:00:10,511 --> 00:00:12,263 - Okay. - All right! 3 00:00:12,430 --> 00:00:14,849 But, uh, ahem, what is it not? 4 00:00:15,433 --> 00:00:18,436 A place to entertain my lady friends. 5 00:00:19,020 --> 00:00:23,524 - And what else is it not? - A place to eat spaghetti. 6 00:00:24,191 --> 00:00:25,234 - Very good. - Thanks. 7 00:00:25,401 --> 00:00:28,988 - What do you need it for anyway? - The, uh, lottery is up to 300 million... 8 00:00:29,196 --> 00:00:33,659 - ...and they don't sell tickets here. - So you're driving up to Connecticut? 9 00:00:33,826 --> 00:00:37,038 Yeah, Connecticut. Not West Virginia. 10 00:00:38,622 --> 00:00:41,876 Maybe I'll drive you up there. I'd like to buy some tickets myself. 11 00:00:42,251 --> 00:00:46,464 Yeah, with Chandler not getting paid, we could really use $300 million. 12 00:00:46,630 --> 00:00:51,552 Yes, because if I was at my old job, we'd say, "300 million? No, thank you." 13 00:00:53,387 --> 00:00:55,473 - Will you get me tickets too? - Yeah, me too. 14 00:00:55,639 --> 00:00:57,349 - Sure. - Ooh! I have an idea. 15 00:00:57,516 --> 00:01:00,770 Why don't we all pitch in 50 bucks, we'll pool our money together... 16 00:01:00,936 --> 00:01:04,648 - ...and then if we win, we'll split it. - That's a great idea! 17 00:01:05,191 --> 00:01:07,526 No, thanks. 18 00:01:08,194 --> 00:01:10,529 - You don't want to win the lottery? - Uh, sure I do. 19 00:01:10,696 --> 00:01:12,698 I also want to be king of my own country... 20 00:01:12,865 --> 00:01:15,659 ...and find out what happened to Amelia Earhart. 21 00:01:16,243 --> 00:01:19,413 - Still on Amelia Earhart? - The woman just vanished! 22 00:01:21,123 --> 00:01:22,917 Seriously, you don't want in on this? 23 00:01:23,125 --> 00:01:26,045 No. Do you know what your odds are of winning the lottery? 24 00:01:26,212 --> 00:01:29,840 I mean, you have a better chance of being struck by lightning 42 times. 25 00:01:30,049 --> 00:01:33,219 But there's six of us, so we'd only have to get struck 7 times. 26 00:01:33,427 --> 00:01:35,596 I like those odds! 27 00:01:36,388 --> 00:01:40,309 Seriously, you guys, I can't believe you're gonna spend $250 on the lottery. 28 00:01:40,476 --> 00:01:43,729 I mean, that's such a bunch of boo-hockey. 29 00:01:47,066 --> 00:01:48,984 I'll ask. 30 00:01:49,735 --> 00:01:51,237 "Boo-hockey"? 31 00:01:52,196 --> 00:01:54,365 Oh, we think Emma's about to start talking... 32 00:01:54,532 --> 00:01:58,160 ...so we're trying to be careful about what words we use in front of her. 33 00:01:58,369 --> 00:02:00,538 So get ready to hear a lot of, uh, boo-hockey... 34 00:02:00,704 --> 00:02:03,290 ...gosh darn it and brother pucker. 35 00:02:04,959 --> 00:02:06,919 How do you know she's gonna start talking? 36 00:02:07,128 --> 00:02:10,381 When I talk to her, I almost feel like she understands what I'm saying. 37 00:02:10,548 --> 00:02:13,008 Kind of like Joey. 38 00:02:14,176 --> 00:02:16,220 What's that now? 39 00:03:09,440 --> 00:03:13,068 God, look at all these tickets. It's so exciting. 40 00:03:13,277 --> 00:03:15,237 I haven't won anything since sixth grade. 41 00:03:15,446 --> 00:03:17,740 Pie-eating contest? 42 00:03:19,575 --> 00:03:23,078 You assume because I was heavy that's the only way I could win something? 43 00:03:23,287 --> 00:03:26,290 No, I saw a picture of you covered in blueberries. 44 00:03:26,498 --> 00:03:29,335 - That was a good day. - Yeah. 45 00:03:29,919 --> 00:03:33,881 - They're towing your car! - I'm parked in a garage on Morton. 46 00:03:34,715 --> 00:03:37,301 They're towing a car. 47 00:03:37,468 --> 00:03:41,180 And I am seeing spots. 48 00:03:41,388 --> 00:03:44,058 Ross, you don't have Emma! Rachel, you don't have Emma! 49 00:03:44,225 --> 00:03:46,644 - Where's Emma? Who has Emma? - Joey, relax. 50 00:03:46,810 --> 00:03:51,106 My mother picked her up two hours ago. You were there. 51 00:03:52,107 --> 00:03:54,902 - I was? - Yes, and you talked to her. 52 00:03:55,319 --> 00:03:58,405 - I did? - She dropped off a casserole. 53 00:03:58,614 --> 00:04:01,575 Oh, yeah, the casserole lady. 54 00:04:01,867 --> 00:04:04,161 Did you come by to watch us win the big bucks? 55 00:04:04,370 --> 00:04:07,915 Yeah. And then I figured after you win, we can all go out to the balcony... 56 00:04:08,082 --> 00:04:11,627 ...and see a night rainbow with gremlins dancing on top of it. 57 00:04:13,629 --> 00:04:16,006 Don't touch the phone! I'll get it! I'll get it! 58 00:04:16,465 --> 00:04:19,093 - You think he washed his hands? - Hello? 59 00:04:19,301 --> 00:04:21,637 - Hey, Charlie, what do you know? - What's going on? 60 00:04:21,845 --> 00:04:25,057 Chandler's supposed to find out if he's getting a job at his agency. 61 00:04:25,224 --> 00:04:27,643 But out of 15 interns, they're only hiring three. 62 00:04:27,851 --> 00:04:29,645 - Ooh. Tough odds. - Yeah. 63 00:04:29,853 --> 00:04:33,607 If only it were a sure thing like your 24-state lottery. 64 00:04:34,650 --> 00:04:38,445 Yeah, look who's coming around! 65 00:04:38,654 --> 00:04:42,366 Damn it. All right, call me when you know more. 66 00:04:43,701 --> 00:04:46,578 - Did you get it? - One of the slots got filled. 67 00:04:47,079 --> 00:04:51,500 - By you? - Sense the tone. 68 00:04:52,793 --> 00:04:56,338 - No, that kid Nate got it. - Oh, I hate that guy. 69 00:04:56,505 --> 00:04:59,758 - I mean, come on, pull up your pants! - I know. 70 00:04:59,925 --> 00:05:01,802 Well, there's two spots left, right? 71 00:05:02,011 --> 00:05:04,638 Yeah. I mean, I want this so much. I want to get one. 72 00:05:04,805 --> 00:05:07,016 I want my friend Charlie to get one. 73 00:05:07,182 --> 00:05:09,268 Except I don't care about Charlie. 74 00:05:11,145 --> 00:05:12,229 Hey! 75 00:05:12,396 --> 00:05:15,149 You are not gonna believe this. I just saw my psychic... 76 00:05:15,316 --> 00:05:19,194 ...and she said I was definitely gonna win the lottery tonight! 77 00:05:20,571 --> 00:05:22,656 I thought we could use some extra luck... 78 00:05:22,823 --> 00:05:24,867 ...so I brought a wishbone home from work. 79 00:05:25,075 --> 00:05:31,540 A psychic and a wishbone? Guys, give someone else a chance. 80 00:05:32,041 --> 00:05:34,084 - All right, who wants to do it? - Ooh, can I? 81 00:05:34,293 --> 00:05:37,254 Vegetarians never get to do the wishbone. 82 00:05:37,421 --> 00:05:40,257 It's really not fair. Just because we don't eat the meat... 83 00:05:40,424 --> 00:05:43,510 ...doesn't mean we don't like to play with the carcasses. 84 00:05:44,136 --> 00:05:45,846 All right. Rash'? 85 00:05:46,055 --> 00:05:48,432 I don't want that turkey smell all over my hands. 86 00:05:48,640 --> 00:05:52,186 I'll do it! It'll get the casserole stink off of mine. 87 00:05:54,646 --> 00:05:57,274 - I hope I win. - Well, it doesn't really matter. 88 00:05:57,441 --> 00:05:59,401 You're both wishing for the same thing. 89 00:05:59,610 --> 00:06:04,365 I can't tell you what I'm wishing for, or else, you know, it won't come true. Ha, ha. 90 00:06:04,698 --> 00:06:07,618 Right. But we know what you're wishing for. 91 00:06:07,826 --> 00:06:10,788 - I can't really say. - I understand. 92 00:06:10,954 --> 00:06:13,499 But you're wishing for what we think, aren't you? 93 00:06:13,707 --> 00:06:16,460 I'm not really comfortable with these questions! 94 00:06:16,627 --> 00:06:18,712 - Please! - Just do it! 95 00:06:18,921 --> 00:06:20,881 Okay. One, two, three. 96 00:06:21,048 --> 00:06:22,966 I won! Hey! 97 00:06:23,133 --> 00:06:26,261 You know what? I'm sure your wish is gonna come true. 98 00:06:26,428 --> 00:06:29,973 But, you guys, just in case, maybe a genie will come out if we rub this lamp. 99 00:06:30,140 --> 00:06:31,683 Qw! 100 00:06:32,601 --> 00:06:34,645 That thing gets hot! 101 00:06:34,812 --> 00:06:36,480 Ross, just keep making yourjokes. 102 00:06:36,647 --> 00:06:38,857 How are you gonna feel if we actually do win? 103 00:06:39,066 --> 00:06:42,236 - Uh, you're not gonna win. - I know the odds are against us... 104 00:06:42,403 --> 00:06:46,573 ...but somebody has to win, and it could be us. And then how you gonna feel? 105 00:06:46,740 --> 00:06:50,494 We're gonna be like, "Everybody, let's take our helicopters up to the Cape." 106 00:06:50,661 --> 00:06:53,038 And you're gonna be all, like, "Oh, I can't, guys. 107 00:06:53,205 --> 00:06:56,417 I'll have to meet you up there. I gotta gas up the Hyundai." 108 00:07:00,546 --> 00:07:04,591 Okay, I've heard myself on tape, and I sound nothing like that. 109 00:07:05,384 --> 00:07:07,970 I can see the headline now: "Lottery Winners' Friend... 110 00:07:08,137 --> 00:07:10,556 ...Filled With Regret, Eats Own Arm." 111 00:07:11,265 --> 00:07:12,724 Why would I eat my own arm? 112 00:07:12,933 --> 00:07:16,520 Well, you wouldn't, but we own the paper. We can print whatever we want. 113 00:07:16,687 --> 00:07:19,314 You know what? I'm gonna throw in 50 bucks for you. 114 00:07:19,982 --> 00:07:21,900 - Why? - Because I know that you think... 115 00:07:22,067 --> 00:07:25,154 ...that the lottery is boo-hockey... 116 00:07:25,529 --> 00:07:29,074 ...but we're all here, and we're gonna watch the numbers and have fun. 117 00:07:29,241 --> 00:07:33,245 And you're my brother, and I want you to be a part of this. 118 00:07:33,954 --> 00:07:37,666 You don't have to do that. I mean, I'll pay for myself. 119 00:07:37,833 --> 00:07:41,712 But just the fact that you want me to have fun with you guys, that's so sweet. 120 00:07:41,879 --> 00:07:43,505 Come here. 121 00:07:44,548 --> 00:07:47,009 Get a room. 122 00:07:50,345 --> 00:07:53,015 So now that you're in, what are you gonna do if we win? 123 00:07:53,223 --> 00:07:57,853 - I don't know. I'll probably just invest it. - Ooh. Calm down. 124 00:07:58,020 --> 00:08:00,814 Seriously, that's your fantasy? To invest it? 125 00:08:01,023 --> 00:08:05,736 Oh, I'm sorry. Did I say, "invest it"? I meant, "Be cool and piss it all away." 126 00:08:06,862 --> 00:08:11,658 Oh! Oh! I know! We should pool all our money and buy the Knicks! 127 00:08:11,992 --> 00:08:13,869 I don't really care about the Knicks. 128 00:08:14,077 --> 00:08:16,997 You will when I pick you as starting forward. 129 00:08:17,414 --> 00:08:21,418 You would do that? I never get picked! 130 00:08:21,793 --> 00:08:23,795 I'm not sure a sports team is the way to go. 131 00:08:23,962 --> 00:08:27,466 You won't let me buy the Knicks? I can't believe you're taking this away. 132 00:08:27,633 --> 00:08:30,802 You're right, it has been your dream for over 15 seconds. 133 00:08:32,513 --> 00:08:35,974 Uh, how long until they announce the numbers, Mommy? 134 00:08:36,475 --> 00:08:40,729 I'll take this one too. Uh, "Mommy"? 135 00:08:41,188 --> 00:08:43,941 Oh, I've gotten into the habit of calling Rachel "Mommy"... 136 00:08:44,107 --> 00:08:45,984 ...when we're around Emma. 137 00:08:46,151 --> 00:08:50,030 Which I now realize we are not. 138 00:08:51,156 --> 00:08:53,075 I'm hoping that if she hears it enough... 139 00:08:53,242 --> 00:08:54,576 - ...it'll be her first word. - Oh. 140 00:08:54,785 --> 00:08:57,829 Although if we're gonna do that, we should probably call me "Daddy" too. 141 00:08:57,996 --> 00:09:01,959 Mm. I like that, Daddy. 142 00:09:05,671 --> 00:09:08,549 I, uh... I was just talking about Rachel. 143 00:09:08,757 --> 00:09:10,842 Ooh, is Daddy getting angry? 144 00:09:13,512 --> 00:09:16,181 Is Daddy gonna spank me? 145 00:09:18,100 --> 00:09:20,352 Well, that depends. 146 00:09:20,519 --> 00:09:23,272 Have you been a bad...? No, I can't. 147 00:09:26,733 --> 00:09:30,946 Hello? Hello? Hey, Charlie. Did anybody else hear? 148 00:09:31,947 --> 00:09:34,491 What? Susan got it? How? 149 00:09:34,658 --> 00:09:37,786 Oh, man, I would've slept with him! 150 00:09:38,537 --> 00:09:40,581 All right, bye. 151 00:09:41,164 --> 00:09:43,792 Dude, I'm sorry. But hey, there's one spot left, right? 152 00:09:43,959 --> 00:09:46,670 - Well, Charlie's gonna get that. - Hey, don't say that. 153 00:09:46,837 --> 00:09:49,506 You've got just as good a chance of getting that job. 154 00:09:49,715 --> 00:09:51,383 He is the boss' son. 155 00:09:51,925 --> 00:09:54,469 - Come on, lottery! - Yeah! 156 00:09:54,636 --> 00:09:57,347 - It starts in, like, 20 minutes. - Okay, here we go. 157 00:09:57,514 --> 00:10:00,892 We need to sort through the tickets quickly to see if we've won. 158 00:10:01,059 --> 00:10:03,770 So does anybody have any ideas how to organize this? 159 00:10:03,937 --> 00:10:06,106 Okay, how about this: 160 00:10:06,898 --> 00:10:08,942 We divide them into six groups of 40. 161 00:10:09,109 --> 00:10:12,154 The remaining 10 can be read by whoever finishes first. 162 00:10:12,362 --> 00:10:15,115 - I have another idea. - I'm sorry, idea time is over. 163 00:10:17,200 --> 00:10:19,661 - Well, are all the tickets in the bowl? - Yeah. 164 00:10:19,870 --> 00:10:23,332 - What about the ones on the nightstand? - There are no tickets there. 165 00:10:23,540 --> 00:10:25,834 Yes, there are. I just saw them a few minutes ago. 166 00:10:26,001 --> 00:10:30,380 Heh. Uh, no, you didn't. You must be mistaken. 167 00:10:30,547 --> 00:10:33,842 - There are 20 tickets on the nightstand. - Chandler, sense the tone. 168 00:10:35,510 --> 00:10:39,723 Well, well, well. Look what Mommy found. 169 00:10:40,682 --> 00:10:44,102 Okay, fine. I bought 20 extra tickets for me and Chandler. 170 00:10:45,479 --> 00:10:47,981 The psychic also said that I would be betrayed. 171 00:10:49,691 --> 00:10:52,569 I can't believe this. I thought we were all in this together. 172 00:10:52,778 --> 00:10:56,114 - Hey, you just got in five minutes ago! - Three minutes ago! 173 00:10:56,281 --> 00:10:58,825 I don't know why that's important. 174 00:10:59,034 --> 00:11:03,163 I was with you the whole time. When did you even get those? 175 00:11:03,372 --> 00:11:07,876 When you were reading the dirty magazines without taking off the plastic. 176 00:11:08,210 --> 00:11:09,961 I'll show you how. 177 00:11:10,921 --> 00:11:14,216 Okay. Well, Monica, suppose one of your special tickets wins? 178 00:11:14,383 --> 00:11:17,219 How are you gonna feel when you win and lose your friends? 179 00:11:17,427 --> 00:11:21,223 Please. If I win the lottery, you guys are not gonna leave me. 180 00:11:21,390 --> 00:11:25,560 Someone gave me muffins last week. I couldn't get rid of you for three days! 181 00:11:26,645 --> 00:11:29,856 Chandler, would you just tell her what she did was wrong? 182 00:11:30,065 --> 00:11:32,943 She's right. You shouldn't have bought tickets just for us. 183 00:11:33,151 --> 00:11:34,778 Let me finish. 184 00:11:34,945 --> 00:11:37,572 However, it doesn't look like I'm gonna get this job... 185 00:11:37,739 --> 00:11:42,077 ...so I can't afford to have principles. So screw you! The tickets are ours! 186 00:11:43,036 --> 00:11:45,622 There's the man I married. 187 00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:48,166 All right. Believe me, if you win the lottery... 188 00:11:48,333 --> 00:11:50,335 ...it's the last you're gonna hear from us. 189 00:11:50,544 --> 00:11:55,257 Fine. Don't be my friends. I'll buy new friends. 190 00:11:55,507 --> 00:12:00,429 Yeah, and then I'll pay for their plastic surgery so they look just like you! 191 00:12:00,595 --> 00:12:03,223 You know what? I want my share of the tickets. 192 00:12:03,390 --> 00:12:05,892 I want my tickets too! And I'm buying the Knicks! 193 00:12:06,059 --> 00:12:08,520 And Steffi Graf! Ha, ha. 194 00:12:08,687 --> 00:12:11,064 Cool. Then I want mine too! And if I win... 195 00:12:11,231 --> 00:12:14,401 ...I'm gonna put it all into a very low-yield bond! 196 00:12:14,609 --> 00:12:18,947 No. You guys, we gotta keep all the tickets together. 197 00:12:19,114 --> 00:12:21,158 No. No, we should divide them up... 198 00:12:21,324 --> 00:12:23,744 ...and I should get extra because we used my car! 199 00:12:23,952 --> 00:12:26,663 Hey! Hey! If anybody gets extra tickets, it should be me! 200 00:12:26,830 --> 00:12:31,460 - This whole thing was my idea! - Yeah. Thanks for inventing the lottery! 201 00:12:32,544 --> 00:12:35,046 Just give them to me, and I'll split them up! 202 00:12:35,213 --> 00:12:37,215 Aw! - Ah! 203 00:12:37,382 --> 00:12:39,426 ROSSI Hey, hey! - Aah! 204 00:12:40,093 --> 00:12:43,138 God, I can't take it anymore! I'm putting an end to this! 205 00:12:43,346 --> 00:12:46,683 - Okay, if she jumps, I get her tickets! - Wait, no, no! Hey! 206 00:12:48,477 --> 00:12:51,480 If we're not doing this together, we're not doing it at all. 207 00:12:51,646 --> 00:12:53,982 - Say goodbye to your tickets. - No! No! No! 208 00:12:54,191 --> 00:12:56,777 Do not come any closer! 209 00:12:56,943 --> 00:13:00,655 Can I come a little bit closer? Valuable things are getting squished. 210 00:13:00,864 --> 00:13:03,533 Now, what's more important, your friends or money? 211 00:13:03,742 --> 00:13:06,119 - Fflends! - Money! 212 00:13:09,456 --> 00:13:10,999 Fflends. 213 00:13:11,875 --> 00:13:14,294 Hey, Monica, what about your extra tickets? 214 00:13:14,503 --> 00:13:16,505 They're all in there. 215 00:13:17,255 --> 00:13:20,592 - Even these five that I hid in my bra. - Monica! 216 00:13:20,759 --> 00:13:23,595 Okay. Good. You guys were so scared. 217 00:13:23,762 --> 00:13:26,598 There is no way I was gonna dump this... 218 00:13:26,765 --> 00:13:29,392 - Aah! 219 00:13:32,062 --> 00:13:34,731 I think I broke your bowl. 220 00:13:35,023 --> 00:13:37,692 Go! Go! Go! 221 00:13:52,040 --> 00:13:56,378 What a beautiful night to be running around the street, looking for tickets. 222 00:13:57,128 --> 00:13:59,339 And the wind sure made it fun. 223 00:14:00,173 --> 00:14:02,634 - Phoebe, we lost half of them. - So what? 224 00:14:02,801 --> 00:14:04,928 Monica, we have the winning ticket. 225 00:14:05,095 --> 00:14:08,557 My psychic said I was gonna win, remember? 226 00:14:08,723 --> 00:14:12,477 Weird your psychic didn't mention anything about the scary pigeon. 227 00:14:13,979 --> 00:14:17,607 As a matter of fact, she said that's how I'm going to die. 228 00:14:17,774 --> 00:14:22,070 So excuse me for being a little skittish. 229 00:14:22,237 --> 00:14:24,406 There's two messages. This could be from work. 230 00:14:24,573 --> 00:14:27,951 - Oh, play them. - Okay. Here we go. 231 00:14:29,327 --> 00:14:35,166 Hello. This is the pigeon from the balcony calling to apologize. 232 00:14:35,625 --> 00:14:41,089 I shouldn't have knocked the tickets out of the pretty lady's hand. 233 00:14:41,756 --> 00:14:46,303 It was all my fault. Not hers. Bye. Coo. 234 00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:55,353 Well, I bet that was very hard for him to do. 235 00:14:57,397 --> 00:14:59,065 Hey, Chandler, it's Charlie. 236 00:14:59,232 --> 00:15:01,109 This is it. Shh, Shh! 237 00:15:01,276 --> 00:15:05,447 Listen, um, it turns out I got the last spot. 238 00:15:05,614 --> 00:15:08,450 I'm really sorry, man. It was a lot of fun working with you 239 00:15:08,617 --> 00:15:11,077 Give me a call if you want. 240 00:15:11,244 --> 00:15:13,997 Gosh, I'm so sorry, honey. 241 00:15:14,164 --> 00:15:15,707 Sorry, Chandler. 242 00:15:15,874 --> 00:15:20,795 It is so unfair. It's like that time they promoted Saundra over me at work. 243 00:15:21,004 --> 00:15:22,714 Was she related to Ralph Lauren? 244 00:15:22,923 --> 00:15:26,593 No, she was just much better at her job than me. 245 00:15:26,801 --> 00:15:28,637 You guys, the drawing's about to start. 246 00:15:28,803 --> 00:15:31,806 We should call my mom's and say good night to Emma... 247 00:15:31,973 --> 00:15:34,017 - ...before she goes down. - Good idea. 248 00:15:34,517 --> 00:15:37,312 Honey, you're being really strong about this. 249 00:15:37,479 --> 00:15:40,023 I know how badly you wanted that job. 250 00:15:40,231 --> 00:15:43,026 Yeah, you know, I really thought I deserved it. 251 00:15:43,318 --> 00:15:48,615 But let's go win the lottery. I mean, we still have a 130 chances to win, right? 252 00:15:50,241 --> 00:15:52,661 Hundred and thirty-one. 253 00:15:53,578 --> 00:15:56,289 Yeah, good night, sweetheart. I love you. 254 00:15:56,456 --> 00:16:00,293 And remember, you're Daddy's little girl. Heh. 255 00:16:00,460 --> 00:16:03,129 Phoebe's totally ruined that for me. 256 00:16:06,758 --> 00:16:08,259 Hi, Mom. Put her back on. 257 00:16:08,426 --> 00:16:10,428 Rach, they're announcing the numbers! 258 00:16:11,179 --> 00:16:14,641 My God, I can already feel myself changing. 259 00:16:15,058 --> 00:16:18,937 Here are your official Powerball numbers. We have 53. 260 00:16:19,145 --> 00:16:21,648 - I've got that. - We have one too! 261 00:16:21,815 --> 00:16:24,609 We are on the road, people! 262 00:16:25,944 --> 00:16:26,987 Come on! 263 00:16:27,195 --> 00:16:32,659 Mom, please, I know you love your new lips, but I can barely understand you. 264 00:16:32,826 --> 00:16:35,954 Would you please just let me say good night to my daughter? 265 00:16:36,162 --> 00:16:38,540 And here we go. The Powerball is seven. 266 00:16:38,748 --> 00:16:42,460 All right, check your numbers! Make me rich. 267 00:16:43,920 --> 00:16:45,922 You guys, you're not gonna believe this. 268 00:16:46,089 --> 00:16:49,467 I was just saying good night to Emma, and she said her first words. 269 00:16:49,884 --> 00:16:51,761 - What? - Well, what did she say? 270 00:16:51,970 --> 00:16:54,806 She said, "Gleba"! 271 00:16:58,643 --> 00:17:00,895 Make me rich! 272 00:17:01,521 --> 00:17:04,899 - Isn't that amazing? - Oh, yeah. No, no, no, that's great. 273 00:17:05,066 --> 00:17:06,776 Why aren't you more excited? 274 00:17:07,527 --> 00:17:11,239 Rach, heh, "gleba" is not a word. 275 00:17:11,656 --> 00:17:15,660 - Well, of course it is. - Okay. What does it mean? 276 00:17:15,869 --> 00:17:18,913 Well, I don't know all the words. 277 00:17:19,289 --> 00:17:22,792 You know, I'm just glad I didn't miss my daughter's first word. 278 00:17:22,959 --> 00:17:27,297 - Yes you did! Gleba is a word! - Okay. Use it in a sentence. 279 00:17:27,505 --> 00:17:31,301 Okay. Uh, Emma just said, "Gleba 280 00:17:34,345 --> 00:17:38,349 - It's not a word. - Ugh. Okay, fine. I'm gonna look it up. 281 00:17:38,516 --> 00:17:40,060 Oh, okay, great. 282 00:17:40,268 --> 00:17:43,980 While you're at it, she said another word the other day. Why don't you look up: 283 00:17:49,861 --> 00:17:54,240 All right. Okay. Okay. Gleba Gleba. Gleba. Gleba! 284 00:17:54,449 --> 00:17:59,829 Here it is! "The fleshy, spore-bearing inner mass of a certain fungi." 285 00:18:03,500 --> 00:18:04,584 Heh. 286 00:18:04,751 --> 00:18:08,171 She's gonna be a scientist. 287 00:18:15,428 --> 00:18:17,972 - Damn it. Anybody got anything? - No. 288 00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:20,308 I'm still looking through mine. 289 00:18:20,517 --> 00:18:23,686 Just double-checking. No. 290 00:18:23,853 --> 00:18:26,773 No. No. 291 00:18:31,611 --> 00:18:33,655 No! 292 00:18:36,866 --> 00:18:39,661 Hello? Hold on. 293 00:18:39,828 --> 00:18:40,870 It's your boss. 294 00:18:41,037 --> 00:18:43,832 Ah, the "I'm sorry I rejected you" phone call. 295 00:18:43,998 --> 00:18:46,626 I'm not used to getting these from guys. 296 00:18:47,669 --> 00:18:50,171 - Hey, Steve. - Chandler, hi. 297 00:18:50,338 --> 00:18:53,258 I'm sure you've heard we filled the three positions. 298 00:18:53,424 --> 00:18:55,760 We felt that with your maturity and experience... 299 00:18:55,927 --> 00:18:58,388 ...you wouldn't be happy being someone's assistant. 300 00:18:58,596 --> 00:19:01,182 I'd love to be somebody's assistant. Answering phones... 301 00:19:01,349 --> 00:19:03,184 ...getting coffee, I live for that stuff. 302 00:19:03,351 --> 00:19:08,273 And I'm not too mature. Farts, boobies, butt cracks! 303 00:19:10,316 --> 00:19:13,611 Chandler, you were the strongest person in the program. 304 00:19:13,778 --> 00:19:17,240 We're offering you the position of junior copywriter. 305 00:19:18,950 --> 00:19:21,703 Me? That guy who just said, "butt cracks"? 306 00:19:21,870 --> 00:19:23,079 Yes, that's right. 307 00:19:23,288 --> 00:19:25,623 We're excited about the level of sophistication... 308 00:19:25,790 --> 00:19:28,126 ...you'll be bringing to the job. 309 00:19:29,544 --> 00:19:33,214 Okay. Well, thanks, you won't regret it. I'll see you tomorrow. 310 00:19:45,685 --> 00:19:47,353 What? 311 00:19:47,520 --> 00:19:49,480 Oh, yeah, I'm gonna be a junior copywriter! 312 00:19:51,566 --> 00:19:54,527 Congratulations! Oh, sweetie, I'm so proud of you. 313 00:19:54,694 --> 00:19:57,322 Thanks. Does that mean I get the good loving tonight? 314 00:19:57,488 --> 00:20:01,326 You bet. No TV or anything. 315 00:20:01,993 --> 00:20:05,330 - Hey, that is so great about the job. - Thanks, man. 316 00:20:05,496 --> 00:20:07,665 I'd like to think I had something to do with it. 317 00:20:07,874 --> 00:20:11,085 - Really? Why? - Well, before with the wishbone. 318 00:20:11,252 --> 00:20:17,008 I, uh, didn't wish we would win the lottery. I wished you'd get the job. 319 00:20:17,467 --> 00:20:19,510 Oh, yeah? 320 00:20:19,844 --> 00:20:21,888 Don't tell Monica. She'll rip your heart out. 321 00:20:22,096 --> 00:20:23,264 Oh, yeah. 322 00:20:26,017 --> 00:20:28,519 Well, you know what? There was a little part of me... 323 00:20:28,686 --> 00:20:30,772 ...that really thought we were gonna win. 324 00:20:30,980 --> 00:20:37,445 Me too. So much for my dinosaur/Amelia Earhart theme park. 325 00:20:38,571 --> 00:20:42,033 You guys? What was the Powerball number again? 326 00:20:42,200 --> 00:20:44,786 - Seven. - We won. 327 00:20:45,078 --> 00:20:46,871 - What? - We won! 328 00:20:47,038 --> 00:20:49,749 - Let me see! Let me see! - Don't tear it! 329 00:20:50,124 --> 00:20:53,920 Phoebe, you don't have any of the first five numbers! 330 00:20:55,004 --> 00:21:01,261 I know that, but look, we got the Powerball number. We won $3! 331 00:21:02,136 --> 00:21:06,224 Wow, you think we should get that over 20 years or go for the big payout? 332 00:21:06,391 --> 00:21:11,020 I don't care. I've never won anything before. I can't believe this! 333 00:21:11,229 --> 00:21:13,481 So, Pheebs, what are you gonna do with your $3? 334 00:21:13,690 --> 00:21:16,818 Well, it's not all mine. We all get 50 cents. 335 00:21:17,527 --> 00:21:20,488 Aw. You know what? You can have mine. 336 00:21:20,655 --> 00:21:21,906 - Me too. - Me too. 337 00:21:22,073 --> 00:21:24,409 Me too. Ha, ha. 338 00:21:29,122 --> 00:21:32,000 Well, I guess if everybody else is. 339 00:21:41,467 --> 00:21:44,429 Hey, guys. So I just called the Powerball hot line. 340 00:21:44,762 --> 00:21:49,892 - Can you believe it? Nobody won. - Um, I beg to differ. 341 00:21:51,394 --> 00:21:55,023 Maybe nobody won the jackpot, but there was this guy in here earlier... 342 00:21:55,189 --> 00:22:00,111 ...and he found a ticket on the street right outside and won $10,000. 343 00:22:09,620 --> 00:22:14,751 Coo. Again, don't blame the pretty lady. 344 00:22:15,126 --> 00:22:20,089 It was not her fault. It was me, the pigeon. Coo. 345 00:22:23,634 --> 00:22:26,929 Seriously, stop staring at her.