1 00:00:06,089 --> 00:00:07,881 Hey, remember when I had a monkey? 2 00:00:08,049 --> 00:00:09,591 - Yeah. Mm-hm. 3 00:00:09,759 --> 00:00:12,177 Yeah. What was I thinking? 4 00:00:12,887 --> 00:00:17,599 Hey, so, what's with the 20 percent tip? Did I do something wrong? 5 00:00:19,060 --> 00:00:21,061 Twenty percent is a pretty generous tip. 6 00:00:21,229 --> 00:00:24,398 You know what's more generous than that? Fifty percent. 7 00:00:25,066 --> 00:00:28,777 - You know what's even more generous? - I see where you're going. 8 00:00:29,404 --> 00:00:32,614 - What's up with the greed, Joe? - All right, look, I'm sorry, you guys. 9 00:00:32,782 --> 00:00:35,367 It's just that I gotta get these new headshots made... 10 00:00:35,535 --> 00:00:37,494 ...and they're really expensive, you know. 11 00:00:37,662 --> 00:00:39,621 I'm down to like three. 12 00:00:40,290 --> 00:00:43,542 Actually, two, because one of them I kind of blackened in some teeth. 13 00:00:43,710 --> 00:00:45,878 Why'd I do that? Ugh. 14 00:00:46,087 --> 00:00:49,298 Well, isn't there something you can do to earn a little extra money? 15 00:00:49,466 --> 00:00:52,551 I mean, can't you pick up, I don't know, an extra shift here? 16 00:00:52,719 --> 00:00:55,888 Or, you know, I used to beg for money. 17 00:00:57,682 --> 00:01:01,310 Of course, it helps if you've got, you know, a little of this going on. 18 00:01:01,478 --> 00:01:03,979 - Wow, I still have it. Ha, ha. - Yeah. 19 00:01:04,439 --> 00:01:07,858 Wait, don't you have an audition today? Yeah. Maybe you'll get that job. 20 00:01:08,068 --> 00:01:09,109 Oh, ha-ha-ha. 21 00:01:11,196 --> 00:01:12,446 Oh, wait a minute. 22 00:01:12,614 --> 00:01:15,449 I used to get medical experiments done on me all the time. 23 00:01:16,576 --> 00:01:19,036 Ah, finally, an explanation. 24 00:01:19,621 --> 00:01:22,831 No, I used to get paid for all kinds of medical stuff, remember? 25 00:01:22,999 --> 00:01:27,336 Let's see. Uh... Well, I don't wanna donate sperm again. 26 00:01:27,504 --> 00:01:30,422 I really prefer doing that at the home office, you know? 27 00:01:30,590 --> 00:01:34,676 Ooh, ooh, maybe they want some of my blood or spit or something, huh? 28 00:01:34,886 --> 00:01:36,220 - Joey. - Yeah? 29 00:01:36,387 --> 00:01:39,598 What did I tell you about talking to your friends while you're working? 30 00:01:39,766 --> 00:01:41,183 Uh, do it? 31 00:01:42,060 --> 00:01:44,561 That guy's been waiting for his coffee for 10 minutes. 32 00:01:44,729 --> 00:01:47,397 He's complained about you three times. 33 00:01:49,859 --> 00:01:51,235 Now, where was I? 34 00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:33,026 - Hey. - Hey. 35 00:02:33,194 --> 00:02:36,238 - Hey, what have you been up to? - Oh. We went to a self-defense class today. 36 00:02:36,406 --> 00:02:37,447 Wow. 37 00:02:37,615 --> 00:02:41,535 Yeah. Kicking a guy in the crotch all morning really takes it out of you. 38 00:02:41,703 --> 00:02:43,996 Takes it out of you? Heh. 39 00:02:45,290 --> 00:02:47,624 - No, now we can kick anybody's ass. - Yeah. 40 00:02:47,792 --> 00:02:50,043 After one class? I don't think so. 41 00:02:50,503 --> 00:02:52,921 What, you wanna see me self-defend myself? 42 00:02:53,089 --> 00:02:55,424 Go over there and pretend you're a sexual predator. 43 00:02:55,592 --> 00:02:57,342 Go on, I dare you. 44 00:02:58,094 --> 00:03:01,930 Of course you can defend yourself from an attack you know is coming. 45 00:03:02,098 --> 00:03:03,932 That's not enough. 46 00:03:04,100 --> 00:03:07,394 Look, I studied karate for a long time. 47 00:03:08,938 --> 00:03:11,690 And there's a concept you should really be familiar with. 48 00:03:11,858 --> 00:03:16,236 It's what the Japanese call unagi. 49 00:03:18,072 --> 00:03:19,990 Isn't that a kind of sushi? 50 00:03:21,242 --> 00:03:25,329 - No, it's a concept. - Yeah, it is, it is. It's freshwater eel. 51 00:03:25,830 --> 00:03:27,456 All right, maybe it means that too. 52 00:03:27,624 --> 00:03:30,751 Oh, I would kill for a salmon-skin roll right now. 53 00:03:32,045 --> 00:03:35,172 You know what? Fine, get attacked. I don't even care. 54 00:03:35,340 --> 00:03:39,092 Come on, Ross, we're sorry. Please tell us what it is. 55 00:03:41,387 --> 00:03:46,391 Unagi is a state of total awareness. 56 00:03:46,559 --> 00:03:49,186 Okay? Only by achieving true unagi... 57 00:03:49,354 --> 00:03:53,941 ...can you be prepared for any danger that may befall you. 58 00:03:54,484 --> 00:03:57,402 In case someone's trying to steal your bamboo sleeping mat... 59 00:03:57,570 --> 00:03:58,612 ...or your kettle of fish? 60 00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:05,702 All I'm saying is, it's one thing being prepared... 61 00:04:05,870 --> 00:04:07,871 ...for an attack against, like, each other. 62 00:04:08,039 --> 00:04:10,874 Whole other story being prepared for an attack, I don't know... 63 00:04:11,042 --> 00:04:12,834 A surprise! 64 00:04:20,635 --> 00:04:26,265 All right, you knew that was coming, but that doesn't mean you have unagi. 65 00:04:29,185 --> 00:04:32,771 Ooh, if we made reservations, we could have unagi in about a half-hour. 66 00:04:32,939 --> 00:04:34,523 You know what? 67 00:04:36,317 --> 00:04:38,443 - Hey, hey, is Monica here? - No. 68 00:04:38,611 --> 00:04:42,197 Okay, look, I need your help. I don't know what to get for Valentine's Day. 69 00:04:42,365 --> 00:04:47,119 Well, Valentine's Day was two weeks ago, so I wouldn't get her a calendar. 70 00:04:47,328 --> 00:04:51,456 Heh. She was working on Valentine's Day, so we're celebrating it tonight. 71 00:04:51,708 --> 00:04:55,877 Oh, hey, why don't you book a day for both of you at one of those romantic spas? 72 00:04:56,045 --> 00:04:58,463 Ooh, Joey, that's actually a really good idea. 73 00:04:58,631 --> 00:05:01,717 Yeah, and of course, crotchless panties. 74 00:05:04,095 --> 00:05:07,014 Well, as appealing as that does sound to her boyfriend... 75 00:05:07,181 --> 00:05:09,182 ...and her brother... 76 00:05:12,520 --> 00:05:15,522 ...I can't. We promised we'd make each other gifts this year. 77 00:05:15,690 --> 00:05:17,024 - Oh, I love that. - You guys. 78 00:05:17,191 --> 00:05:19,526 You can't make crotchless panties? You take... 79 00:05:21,154 --> 00:05:24,698 - You take a pair of scissors and just cut... - Okay, okay, okay. 80 00:05:25,408 --> 00:05:27,576 So making things, that sounds so much fun. 81 00:05:27,744 --> 00:05:31,038 I thought so too, until I papier-mâchéd one of my eyes shut. 82 00:05:31,622 --> 00:05:33,957 I love papier-mâché. What did you make? 83 00:05:34,125 --> 00:05:35,167 I made a: 84 00:05:37,587 --> 00:05:39,087 - What is that? - Nothing. 85 00:05:39,297 --> 00:05:40,464 Oh. 86 00:05:41,507 --> 00:05:42,799 So, what are you gonna do? 87 00:05:42,967 --> 00:05:45,802 Have you guys made anything that I could take credit for? 88 00:05:45,970 --> 00:05:49,556 Ooh, I have, I have. I started making these little sock bunnies. 89 00:05:49,724 --> 00:05:51,933 Oh, for crying out loud. 90 00:05:53,603 --> 00:05:55,979 Hey, wait a minute. That is my sock. 91 00:05:57,899 --> 00:05:59,524 Now it's your little bunny friend. 92 00:06:10,036 --> 00:06:11,745 Okay. 93 00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:17,501 This actually is a: 94 00:06:21,172 --> 00:06:22,464 - Hey. - Hey, honey. 95 00:06:22,632 --> 00:06:25,258 Can I ask you a question about the Valentine's Day gifts? 96 00:06:25,468 --> 00:06:27,969 - Oh, yeah. - Do we have to make the entire thing? 97 00:06:28,513 --> 00:06:30,806 Yes. Why, did you forget to make yours? 98 00:06:32,225 --> 00:06:33,767 Of course not. 99 00:06:35,603 --> 00:06:38,772 I just have to, uh, go over to the place where I made it and pick it up. 100 00:06:38,940 --> 00:06:39,981 - Okay. - Okay. 101 00:06:40,149 --> 00:06:42,401 I can't wait. It's gonna be the best Valentine's Day ever. 102 00:06:45,488 --> 00:06:48,782 I can't believe it. Make the presents. Make the presents. 103 00:06:49,575 --> 00:06:53,286 - What? - Just so excited to make the presents! 104 00:06:57,792 --> 00:06:59,418 Shoot. 105 00:07:01,546 --> 00:07:03,964 Hi, I'm Joey Tribbiani. 106 00:07:04,132 --> 00:07:06,967 And with all due respect, I'd like to donate some fluids. 107 00:07:08,845 --> 00:07:11,263 We're at the end of one of our research cycles... 108 00:07:11,431 --> 00:07:13,473 ...so we're not looking for applicants now. 109 00:07:13,641 --> 00:07:16,226 That's too bad. I've kind of been saving up. 110 00:07:20,064 --> 00:07:23,191 Uh, you sure there's no studies I can participate in? 111 00:07:23,401 --> 00:07:25,444 Well, here's a schedule of what's coming up. 112 00:07:25,611 --> 00:07:27,195 Ah, thanks. 113 00:07:27,697 --> 00:07:29,239 Oh, but this one starts now. 114 00:07:29,407 --> 00:07:32,409 That one is available now, but only identical twins are eligible. 115 00:07:32,577 --> 00:07:35,245 - It's a twin study. - But it's $2000. 116 00:07:35,955 --> 00:07:38,248 - Sorry. - Oh. 117 00:07:39,709 --> 00:07:41,084 Well, how about this one? 118 00:07:41,252 --> 00:07:46,673 "Testing the Effects of Joey Tribbiani on Attractive Nurse Receptionists." 119 00:07:47,592 --> 00:07:51,386 We already got the results back on that one, and they're not good. 120 00:07:55,433 --> 00:07:57,350 - That was good. - Wasn't that a blast? 121 00:07:57,518 --> 00:08:00,770 - Danger! Danger! - God, Ross! 122 00:08:04,233 --> 00:08:06,443 What the hell was that? 123 00:08:06,611 --> 00:08:10,697 A lesson in the importance of unagi. 124 00:08:13,284 --> 00:08:14,993 You're a freak. 125 00:08:16,120 --> 00:08:17,245 Perhaps. 126 00:08:19,040 --> 00:08:20,081 Now, I'm curious. 127 00:08:20,249 --> 00:08:25,629 At what point during those girlish screams would you have begun to kick my ass? 128 00:08:27,757 --> 00:08:30,550 All right, so we weren't prepared. 129 00:08:32,011 --> 00:08:35,430 I'm sorry I had to take such drastic measures to make my point. 130 00:08:35,598 --> 00:08:37,766 But, look, I just want you guys to be safe. 131 00:08:37,934 --> 00:08:39,309 Oh... 132 00:08:39,477 --> 00:08:41,645 Danger! 133 00:08:45,274 --> 00:08:48,985 Ah, huh? Unagi. 134 00:08:55,243 --> 00:08:57,827 Two thousand bucks is a lot of money. 135 00:08:57,995 --> 00:09:00,413 Boy, I wish I had a twin. 136 00:09:00,581 --> 00:09:03,041 Where could I find someone... 137 00:09:03,209 --> 00:09:06,962 ...who looks exactly like me? 138 00:09:26,732 --> 00:09:27,816 Hey. 139 00:09:27,984 --> 00:09:29,776 Chandler. 140 00:09:31,070 --> 00:09:33,655 I sensed it was you. 141 00:09:35,491 --> 00:09:36,992 What? 142 00:09:37,660 --> 00:09:39,160 Unagi. 143 00:09:39,954 --> 00:09:41,705 I'm always aware. 144 00:09:41,872 --> 00:09:44,833 Okay, are you aware that unagi is an eel? 145 00:09:46,711 --> 00:09:49,462 - What's up? - I can't figure out what to make Monica. 146 00:09:49,630 --> 00:09:52,048 Oh. Why don't you make her one of your little jokes? 147 00:09:52,216 --> 00:09:53,550 I'm going crazy, okay? 148 00:09:53,718 --> 00:09:56,219 Do you have anything around here that looks homemade? 149 00:09:57,096 --> 00:09:59,723 Oh, you know what? She'd love this. 150 00:09:59,890 --> 00:10:03,310 It's an exact replica of Apollo 8. I made it in the sixth grade. 151 00:10:04,645 --> 00:10:08,273 Yeah, I guess I could use that. I could say, "Your love sends me to the moon." 152 00:10:08,441 --> 00:10:11,651 Yeah, yeah. Except Apollo 8 didn't actually land on the moon. 153 00:10:11,819 --> 00:10:12,986 But you could write, um: 154 00:10:13,154 --> 00:10:18,199 "Your love lets me orbit the moon twice and return safely." 155 00:10:19,577 --> 00:10:21,036 Wait, I can't give this to her. 156 00:10:21,245 --> 00:10:24,205 - Why not? - It says "Captain Ross" on the side. 157 00:10:26,083 --> 00:10:28,960 - And it says "I hate Monica" on the bottom. - Oh. 158 00:10:33,049 --> 00:10:35,884 - Danger! - Aah! 159 00:10:40,890 --> 00:10:45,018 Ah. Salmon-skin roll. 160 00:10:49,065 --> 00:10:51,316 Okay, okay. 161 00:11:05,831 --> 00:11:07,707 Yes, honey, I made it myself. 162 00:11:21,764 --> 00:11:24,099 I can't do it. I can't do it. 163 00:11:26,936 --> 00:11:30,772 Oh, oh. A mixed tape. A mixed tape. 164 00:11:32,400 --> 00:11:33,566 - Hey, hi. - Hey. 165 00:11:33,734 --> 00:11:36,653 - You ready to exchange gifts? - Sure. Okay, you go first. 166 00:11:36,821 --> 00:11:38,405 - Okay, come here, come here. - Okay. 167 00:11:38,572 --> 00:11:41,700 Okay, now, it's not wrapped, because I just finished it. 168 00:11:41,867 --> 00:11:43,159 Okay. 169 00:11:43,327 --> 00:11:46,913 But I made you a tape of what I think are all romantic songs. 170 00:11:48,582 --> 00:11:50,250 What a great gift. 171 00:11:51,127 --> 00:11:52,585 Oh. 172 00:11:52,753 --> 00:11:55,338 Is "The Way You Look Tonight" on it? 173 00:11:58,008 --> 00:12:00,051 Maybe. We'll have to listen and see. 174 00:12:00,928 --> 00:12:04,305 - Oh, I love it. Thank you so much. Mwah. - Aw. Okay. Mwah. 175 00:12:04,473 --> 00:12:06,224 Okay, you ready to open yours? 176 00:12:06,392 --> 00:12:08,393 - Yeah. - Okay. 177 00:12:19,822 --> 00:12:21,239 It's a sock bunny. 178 00:12:21,449 --> 00:12:24,159 Ha, ha. Yeah, yeah. Remember how I call you "bunny"? 179 00:12:25,035 --> 00:12:26,786 Not really. 180 00:12:27,997 --> 00:12:31,124 Well, I did one time. And I wanna start doing it more. 181 00:12:32,793 --> 00:12:34,461 - That's what this is about. - I see. 182 00:12:35,045 --> 00:12:37,130 You know, um, Phoebe makes sock bunnies. 183 00:12:37,298 --> 00:12:38,339 No. No, she doesn't. 184 00:12:38,507 --> 00:12:41,009 Phoebe, what she makes, that's... They're sock rabbits. 185 00:12:41,177 --> 00:12:43,720 They're completely different. Okay, okay. 186 00:12:43,888 --> 00:12:47,307 Okay, I didn't make it. I'm sorry. I totally forgot about tonight... 187 00:12:47,475 --> 00:12:49,768 ...and that we were supposed to make the presents. 188 00:12:49,935 --> 00:12:52,896 - Oh, it's okay. I don't... - No, no, it's not okay. It's not. 189 00:12:53,063 --> 00:12:54,564 I mean, you're so incredible. 190 00:12:54,732 --> 00:12:58,777 You went through all this time and effort to make this tape for me. 191 00:12:59,612 --> 00:13:03,239 You know, I'm just gonna... I'm gonna make this up to you. I will. 192 00:13:03,407 --> 00:13:07,577 I am going to cook you anything you want in here. 193 00:13:07,745 --> 00:13:12,332 And I'm going to do anything you want in there. 194 00:13:14,335 --> 00:13:17,545 Well, I did put a lot of thought into the tape. 195 00:13:27,056 --> 00:13:28,473 Wow. 196 00:13:31,894 --> 00:13:36,439 - You are way too young to have seen that. - Oops. Ha, ha. 197 00:13:36,607 --> 00:13:38,483 Your birthday's in a month and a half. 198 00:13:38,651 --> 00:13:40,985 What do you say I forget to get you a present for that too? 199 00:13:42,404 --> 00:13:46,199 You are totally and completely 100 percent forgiven. 200 00:13:47,618 --> 00:13:48,993 - We have got to wash that. - Yeah. 201 00:13:52,498 --> 00:13:55,708 Hey, do you remember that jacket that you loved so much... 202 00:13:55,876 --> 00:13:59,337 ...that you thought was too expensive? - You have done enough. 203 00:13:59,588 --> 00:14:02,090 Ha, ha. I'm gonna wake up early and get it for you. 204 00:14:02,258 --> 00:14:04,425 No, you don't have... Get it in black, not brown. 205 00:14:06,887 --> 00:14:09,347 - Oop. Your cake is ready. - Oop. 206 00:14:12,685 --> 00:14:15,311 It's like that old saying, "Have sex, eat some cake." 207 00:14:19,525 --> 00:14:22,443 Hey, Mon. Hey, Chan. Just getting a soda. 208 00:14:27,533 --> 00:14:29,242 Who the hell are you? 209 00:14:29,994 --> 00:14:31,786 I'm Joey. 210 00:14:32,371 --> 00:14:34,539 How are you doing? 211 00:14:36,333 --> 00:14:39,002 No, no, no! 212 00:14:39,169 --> 00:14:40,753 "How you doing?" 213 00:14:42,506 --> 00:14:45,091 "How you doing?" Damn it, Carl. Go wait in the hall. 214 00:14:51,599 --> 00:14:56,477 - Look, I got to apologize on behalf of Carl. - Who the hell is Carl? 215 00:14:57,062 --> 00:14:58,271 Oh, did I not mention? 216 00:14:59,523 --> 00:15:05,153 Carl is a guy I hired to be my identical twin for a medical research project. 217 00:15:07,907 --> 00:15:11,618 You know, sometimes the good ideas are just right in front of you, aren't they? 218 00:15:11,785 --> 00:15:14,370 Look, I know it sounds crazy, but I think it might work. 219 00:15:14,538 --> 00:15:16,998 But the only problem is Carl's acting is: 220 00:15:17,166 --> 00:15:19,417 The only problem? 221 00:15:20,169 --> 00:15:23,963 Yeah. He's the reason I didn't get that big Minute Maid commercial. 222 00:15:24,131 --> 00:15:27,050 We were supposed to be brothers, but he messed it up. 223 00:15:27,217 --> 00:15:29,844 Hey. Can I get a little piece of that cake? 224 00:15:30,054 --> 00:15:33,014 Pizza. We like pizza. Get out! 225 00:15:41,148 --> 00:15:43,274 - Pat Sajak? - Yep. 226 00:15:43,442 --> 00:15:45,318 - Alex Trebek? - Oh, of course. 227 00:15:45,486 --> 00:15:47,195 - Chuck Woolery? - Definitely. 228 00:15:47,363 --> 00:15:51,407 Phoebe, you will not find a single game-show host... 229 00:15:51,575 --> 00:15:53,242 ...whose ass I cannot kick. 230 00:16:02,628 --> 00:16:05,046 - Say it. - Say we are unagi. 231 00:16:06,632 --> 00:16:09,717 It's not something you are, it's something you have. 232 00:16:10,761 --> 00:16:11,803 Say it. 233 00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:13,638 I could easily get out of this... 234 00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:17,767 ...but there's a chance you could get very, very hurt. 235 00:16:30,406 --> 00:16:34,701 All right, Carl, we're next. Now, remember, what is this not gonna be? 236 00:16:34,868 --> 00:16:37,787 - Another Minute Maid fiasco. - That's right. 237 00:16:37,955 --> 00:16:39,372 And what are you not gonna do? 238 00:16:39,540 --> 00:16:43,292 - I'm not gonna talk, because... - Ah. Damn it, Carl. 239 00:16:47,548 --> 00:16:49,549 Can I have the next one, please? 240 00:16:49,717 --> 00:16:51,134 Thank you. 241 00:16:51,301 --> 00:16:53,344 Joey and Tony Tribbiani. 242 00:16:53,512 --> 00:16:54,887 That's us. 243 00:16:55,055 --> 00:16:58,516 But, uh, this is a study for identical twins. 244 00:16:58,684 --> 00:17:02,103 That's right. Two thousand dollars. 245 00:17:02,730 --> 00:17:04,605 But you're not identical twins. 246 00:17:07,401 --> 00:17:09,110 Damn it, Carl. 247 00:17:15,534 --> 00:17:18,036 Oh, my good God. 248 00:17:18,871 --> 00:17:23,791 Hey. Continuing the countdown of your favorite meals. 249 00:17:23,959 --> 00:17:26,753 Tonight, number three: 250 00:17:27,296 --> 00:17:30,798 Macaroni and cheese with cut-up hot dogs. 251 00:17:32,551 --> 00:17:36,012 Look, you have done enough, okay? You have to stop this now. 252 00:17:36,180 --> 00:17:38,056 I will, but not tonight. 253 00:17:38,223 --> 00:17:42,560 For dinner music, I thought we could listen to that tape that you made me. 254 00:17:42,728 --> 00:17:44,520 - Oh, the mixed tape. - Mm-hm. 255 00:17:48,275 --> 00:17:50,735 When I'm awfully low 256 00:17:51,945 --> 00:17:55,907 Oh. "The Way You Look Tonight" is on here. 257 00:17:56,075 --> 00:17:57,325 Dance with me. 258 00:17:57,534 --> 00:18:00,578 I will feel a glow 259 00:18:00,746 --> 00:18:05,708 Just thinking of you 260 00:18:07,878 --> 00:18:12,590 And the way you look tonight 261 00:18:16,136 --> 00:18:19,055 You are just the sweetest. 262 00:18:21,225 --> 00:18:26,854 I love the way you look every night, Chandler. 263 00:18:31,235 --> 00:18:33,361 That's why I made you this tape. 264 00:18:33,529 --> 00:18:37,907 Happy birthday. Love, Janice. Mwah. 265 00:18:43,455 --> 00:18:45,206 No, you're the sweetest. 266 00:18:51,797 --> 00:18:56,050 Okay, ladies, that ends today's class. Let's remember, let's be safe out there. 267 00:19:02,933 --> 00:19:05,017 - Great class. Heh. - Thanks, man. 268 00:19:05,185 --> 00:19:07,061 Yeah, yeah. I was watching. 269 00:19:10,065 --> 00:19:12,400 Um, hey, a couple of questions, though. 270 00:19:12,568 --> 00:19:15,153 Um, you know that last move... 271 00:19:15,320 --> 00:19:18,406 ...where that woman tripped you and then pinned you to the floor? 272 00:19:18,574 --> 00:19:20,074 What would you do next? 273 00:19:20,242 --> 00:19:22,785 Well, then she'd take her keys and jam them in your... 274 00:19:22,953 --> 00:19:25,997 No, no, no. What would you do next? 275 00:19:26,165 --> 00:19:29,083 - Who, me, the attacker? - Yes, that's right. 276 00:19:30,252 --> 00:19:31,294 Why? 277 00:19:31,461 --> 00:19:35,047 I tried attacking two women. Did not work. 278 00:19:35,632 --> 00:19:37,341 - What? - No, I mean, it's okay. 279 00:19:37,509 --> 00:19:42,305 I mean, they're my friends. In fact, I was married to one of them. 280 00:19:42,472 --> 00:19:44,849 Let me get this straight. You attacked your ex-wife? 281 00:19:45,559 --> 00:19:47,768 Oh, no, no, no. Heh. 282 00:19:47,936 --> 00:19:49,896 I tried. 283 00:19:51,773 --> 00:19:54,567 But I couldn't. That's why I'm here. 284 00:19:55,027 --> 00:19:57,695 Maybe we could attack them together. 285 00:19:59,823 --> 00:20:01,908 That's a no. 286 00:20:03,118 --> 00:20:06,996 I am so, so, so sorry. 287 00:20:07,915 --> 00:20:09,165 Uh-huh. 288 00:20:11,043 --> 00:20:14,670 Oh! And I will cook anything you want in here... 289 00:20:14,838 --> 00:20:18,633 ...and do anything you want in there. 290 00:20:19,885 --> 00:20:23,095 Yeah, you will, and are you kidding me? 291 00:20:25,515 --> 00:20:28,476 Come on, Monica, it's our Valentine's Day. 292 00:20:28,644 --> 00:20:30,811 Please, please, please? 293 00:20:33,106 --> 00:20:36,025 - Okay. - Okay. 294 00:20:39,821 --> 00:20:45,243 My funny valentine 295 00:20:45,410 --> 00:20:49,956 Sweet comic valentine You make me... 296 00:20:50,123 --> 00:20:53,668 - So are we going in there? - I am. 297 00:20:56,797 --> 00:20:59,966 Your looks are laughable 298 00:21:07,057 --> 00:21:08,474 Aha. 299 00:21:08,850 --> 00:21:11,811 Nowhere to run. 300 00:21:13,605 --> 00:21:16,315 I don't like sitting up here. I'm gonna go over... 301 00:21:16,483 --> 00:21:18,150 No, Rachel, they got here first. 302 00:21:27,452 --> 00:21:29,704 - Why is Ross doing that? - Danger! 303 00:21:29,871 --> 00:21:34,709 Oh, my God. Why is he jumping on those women? 304 00:21:36,003 --> 00:21:38,170 We should help them. 305 00:21:38,338 --> 00:21:40,548 I don't think they need any help.