1 00:00:05,005 --> 00:00:07,297 "We've got three minutes till the reactor blows. 2 00:00:07,465 --> 00:00:08,549 We'll never make it!" 3 00:00:08,717 --> 00:00:11,802 "You've got to get out of here! Save yourself!" 4 00:00:13,555 --> 00:00:15,014 "No, I won't leave you." 5 00:00:15,181 --> 00:00:20,060 "Don't worry about me. I'm a robot. I'm just a machine!" 6 00:00:21,521 --> 00:00:25,274 - "No, you're not. Not to me." - Oh, my God. 7 00:00:25,442 --> 00:00:28,610 - What? - I am extremely talented. 8 00:00:29,446 --> 00:00:30,863 - Yeah. You're great. - Yeah. 9 00:00:31,031 --> 00:00:35,159 - Okay, let's take it from... - No, I was really acting my ass off. 10 00:00:36,327 --> 00:00:38,078 I thought I was pretty good too. 11 00:00:38,246 --> 00:00:40,789 Yeah, you're solid. You're just no me. 12 00:00:42,500 --> 00:00:44,668 You know what? I think that's enough for now. 13 00:00:44,836 --> 00:00:46,962 I don't want to be over-rehearsed. Ha-ha-ha. 14 00:00:47,547 --> 00:00:50,215 Fine. I'll do it without you! 15 00:00:50,800 --> 00:00:53,552 I don't need you or anybody else! 16 00:00:53,803 --> 00:00:56,346 I'm gonna make it on my own! 17 00:00:57,682 --> 00:01:00,517 You'll see! You'll all see! 18 00:01:42,143 --> 00:01:44,353 So, what's this thing you're auditioning for? 19 00:01:44,521 --> 00:01:46,271 It's a new TV show. Yeah. 20 00:01:46,439 --> 00:01:49,817 I'm up for the part of Mac, Machiavelli, or "Mac"! 21 00:01:51,778 --> 00:01:56,031 I'm a detective and I solve crimes with the help of my robot partner. 22 00:01:56,199 --> 00:01:58,784 He's a computerized, humanoid... 23 00:01:58,952 --> 00:02:02,037 ...electronically enhanced secret enforcer. 24 00:02:02,205 --> 00:02:04,081 Or, "C.H.E.E.S.E." 25 00:02:06,084 --> 00:02:10,420 - So, Mac and C.H.E.E.S. E? - That's the title! 26 00:02:12,215 --> 00:02:14,967 They really lucked out that the initials spell "cheese." 27 00:02:15,802 --> 00:02:17,344 That is lucky. 28 00:02:18,263 --> 00:02:21,265 Huh. So, Joey, if you get this, you're gonna be, like... 29 00:02:21,432 --> 00:02:23,142 ...the star of your own TV show. 30 00:02:23,309 --> 00:02:27,771 I mean, you'll be like the "Big Cheese" or the "Big Mac." Hey, you love those! 31 00:02:28,314 --> 00:02:31,483 Don't get your hopes up, because it's probably not gonna happen. 32 00:02:31,651 --> 00:02:33,402 Now, why would you say that, Joseph? 33 00:02:33,570 --> 00:02:36,655 Well, I mean, come on, you guys. My own TV show? 34 00:02:36,823 --> 00:02:39,575 - I don't know if I'm good enough. - I am. Heh. 35 00:02:41,578 --> 00:02:44,454 What are you talking about? You're a terrific actor. 36 00:02:44,789 --> 00:02:48,125 - You really think so? - How can you even ask that question? 37 00:02:49,711 --> 00:02:53,088 - She's pretty. - Yeah. And she's really nice too. 38 00:02:53,256 --> 00:02:56,383 She taught me all about, you know, how to work with cameras... 39 00:02:56,551 --> 00:02:58,552 ...and "smell the fart" acting. 40 00:03:01,472 --> 00:03:04,016 - I'm sorry, what'd you say? - Excuse me? 41 00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:07,269 It's like you got so many lines to learn so fast... 42 00:03:07,437 --> 00:03:10,439 ...that sometimes you need a minute to remember your next one. 43 00:03:10,607 --> 00:03:15,736 So while you're thinking of it, you take this big pause where you look all intense. 44 00:03:15,904 --> 00:03:17,404 You know, like this: 45 00:03:19,824 --> 00:03:21,158 - Oh. - Okay. 46 00:03:22,577 --> 00:03:24,703 Here's my scene! Here's my scene! 47 00:03:25,455 --> 00:03:29,041 Mrs. Wallace? I'm Dr. Drake Ramoray, your sister's neurosurgeon. 48 00:03:29,209 --> 00:03:31,710 You sister is suffering from a... 49 00:03:36,799 --> 00:03:42,179 Well, Eva, we've done some excellent work here. 50 00:03:43,514 --> 00:03:50,145 And I would have to say, your problem is quite clear. 51 00:03:51,272 --> 00:03:54,524 All you want is a dinkle 52 00:03:55,109 --> 00:03:57,694 What you envy's a schwang 53 00:03:57,862 --> 00:04:01,073 A thing through which you can tinkle 54 00:04:01,491 --> 00:04:04,243 Or play with or simply let hang 55 00:04:04,410 --> 00:04:06,828 I play Al Pacino's butt. 56 00:04:08,957 --> 00:04:13,335 All right? He goes into the shower and then, I'm his butt. 57 00:04:14,170 --> 00:04:16,713 - Oh, my God. - Come on, you guys. 58 00:04:16,881 --> 00:04:20,217 This is a real movie and Al Pacino's in it, and that's big! 59 00:04:20,385 --> 00:04:24,304 No, it's terrific. You deserve this after all your years of struggling... 60 00:04:24,472 --> 00:04:27,975 ...you've finally been able to crack your way into show business. 61 00:04:30,770 --> 00:04:35,023 Okay, fine, make jokes. I don't care. This is a big break for me. 62 00:04:35,191 --> 00:04:37,401 - No, you're right, it is. - Yeah. 63 00:04:37,944 --> 00:04:40,570 So, you gonna invite us all to the big opening? 64 00:04:42,740 --> 00:04:44,908 All right, I'm out of here. Wish me luck. 65 00:04:45,076 --> 00:04:51,081 Good luck, good luck We all wish you good luck 66 00:04:52,625 --> 00:04:54,418 Yeah, whatever. 67 00:04:59,507 --> 00:05:00,924 It's your turn. 68 00:05:01,968 --> 00:05:03,885 Oh, are we playing this? 69 00:05:06,097 --> 00:05:07,764 - Hey. - Hey. How did the audition go? 70 00:05:07,932 --> 00:05:12,144 Terrible. I messed up every line. I shouldn't even be an actor. 71 00:05:12,312 --> 00:05:15,897 Wait. Are you doing that thing where you pretend it didn't go well... 72 00:05:16,065 --> 00:05:17,482 ...but it really did go well? 73 00:05:18,609 --> 00:05:23,280 - Yeah, did I fool you? - Totally! 74 00:05:23,448 --> 00:05:25,949 - So, it did go well? - It went amazingly well! 75 00:05:26,117 --> 00:05:27,159 - Great. - That's great. 76 00:05:27,327 --> 00:05:29,703 - It's down to me and two other guys. - Oh, my God. 77 00:05:29,871 --> 00:05:32,039 I know both of them, and they're really good. 78 00:05:32,206 --> 00:05:35,334 One's from those allergy commercials who's always being chased... 79 00:05:35,501 --> 00:05:38,378 ...by those big flowers. - Oh, I love that guy. 80 00:05:39,130 --> 00:05:41,465 Oh. What are you doing? 81 00:05:41,632 --> 00:05:43,300 What am I doing? 82 00:05:45,053 --> 00:05:48,805 I'm so nervous, you know? The callback isn't till tomorrow at 5. 83 00:05:48,973 --> 00:05:50,724 I feel like my head's gonna explode. 84 00:05:50,892 --> 00:05:53,101 Well, it is overdue. 85 00:05:54,062 --> 00:05:56,104 Don't worry, okay? You're gonna be fine. 86 00:05:56,272 --> 00:05:58,065 Yeah, but it's so much pressure. 87 00:05:58,232 --> 00:06:00,984 No offense, but what you guys all do is very different. 88 00:06:01,152 --> 00:06:02,903 I don't know if you'd understand. 89 00:06:03,071 --> 00:06:06,365 Yeah, none of the rest of us have to deal with pressure at our jobs. 90 00:06:06,532 --> 00:06:08,492 Yes, I know what time it is... 91 00:06:08,659 --> 00:06:11,370 ...but I'm looking at the WENIS and I'm not happy. 92 00:06:12,580 --> 00:06:14,915 Well, I'm tearing the lettuce. 93 00:06:15,083 --> 00:06:18,335 - Uh-huh? Is it dirty? - No, don't worry, I'm gonna wash it. 94 00:06:18,503 --> 00:06:20,379 Don't. I like it dirty. 95 00:06:23,257 --> 00:06:25,092 That's your call. 96 00:06:25,259 --> 00:06:28,178 So, uh, what are you going to do next? 97 00:06:28,346 --> 00:06:31,098 Well, I thought that I would cut up the tomatoes. 98 00:06:31,265 --> 00:06:33,266 Are they firm? 99 00:06:35,436 --> 00:06:36,770 They're all right. 100 00:06:36,938 --> 00:06:41,775 You sure they haven't gone bad? You sure they're not very, very bad? 101 00:06:44,821 --> 00:06:46,655 No, really. They're okay. 102 00:06:46,823 --> 00:06:49,574 You gonna slice them up real nice? 103 00:06:49,742 --> 00:06:51,701 Ahem. Actually, I was gonna do them julienne. 104 00:06:54,205 --> 00:06:55,831 I'm out of here. 105 00:06:55,998 --> 00:06:59,543 Monica, I'm quitting. I just helped an 81 -year-old woman put on a thong... 106 00:06:59,710 --> 00:07:01,461 ...and she didn't even buy it. 107 00:07:02,171 --> 00:07:05,382 I'm quitting. That's it. I'm talking to my boss right now. 108 00:07:05,550 --> 00:07:07,634 Yes, I am. Yes, I am. 109 00:07:08,636 --> 00:07:11,263 Okay, bye. Call me when you get this message. 110 00:07:11,431 --> 00:07:12,556 Well, what happened? 111 00:07:12,723 --> 00:07:17,227 Well, he came in for a massage, and everything was fine until... 112 00:07:20,648 --> 00:07:22,190 Oh, my God. 113 00:07:22,358 --> 00:07:25,610 And all of a sudden, his hands weren't the problem anymore. 114 00:07:30,450 --> 00:07:33,702 - Was it? - Oh, Boy Scouts could've camped under there. 115 00:07:35,329 --> 00:07:36,955 You ate my sandwich. 116 00:07:37,123 --> 00:07:39,666 It was a simple mistake. It could happen to anyone. 117 00:07:39,834 --> 00:07:42,043 Oh, really? 118 00:07:42,253 --> 00:07:44,087 Now calm down. 119 00:07:44,380 --> 00:07:47,424 Come look in my office. Some of it may still be in the trash. 120 00:07:49,719 --> 00:07:51,887 - What? - Well, it was quite large. 121 00:07:52,054 --> 00:07:54,431 I had to throw most of it away. 122 00:07:56,017 --> 00:07:59,102 You threw my sandwich away? 123 00:08:00,229 --> 00:08:02,147 My sandwich? 124 00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:05,066 My sandwich! 125 00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:09,279 It's just, I want this part so much, you know? 126 00:08:09,447 --> 00:08:13,575 If I don't get this part, I'm never gonna eat macaroni and cheese again. 127 00:08:13,743 --> 00:08:16,328 No, I didn't say that. That doesn't count. 128 00:08:20,374 --> 00:08:23,460 Come on, guys. It's not like I moved to Europe. 129 00:08:23,628 --> 00:08:25,629 I just moved across the hall. 130 00:08:25,796 --> 00:08:28,006 And we would have you over all the time... 131 00:08:28,174 --> 00:08:32,344 ...if it weren't for Monica's allergies. 132 00:08:33,721 --> 00:08:36,097 You're right, I could never lie to you. 133 00:08:36,265 --> 00:08:37,641 She hates you. 134 00:08:40,144 --> 00:08:42,312 Should I get that? Ha-ha-ha. 135 00:08:44,148 --> 00:08:47,484 Hello? Uh, no, Joey's not here right now. 136 00:08:47,652 --> 00:08:49,194 Can I take a message? 137 00:08:49,362 --> 00:08:53,073 Yeah, okay. So the audition's been moved from 5 to 2:30? 138 00:08:53,241 --> 00:08:55,200 Okay, great. Bye. 139 00:09:04,627 --> 00:09:08,880 - Aren't you dressed yet? - Am I naked again? 140 00:09:09,715 --> 00:09:12,133 We're supposed to meet my parents in 15 minutes. 141 00:09:12,301 --> 00:09:15,011 Okay. I was just talking to the guys. Just look at them. 142 00:09:15,179 --> 00:09:17,722 I mean, is it okay if they come visit? 143 00:09:17,890 --> 00:09:20,100 What about my allergies? 144 00:09:20,268 --> 00:09:23,019 Right. Your allergies. 145 00:09:25,231 --> 00:09:27,023 All her. She hates you. 146 00:09:37,076 --> 00:09:39,077 Ooh, ooh, ooh. 147 00:09:39,245 --> 00:09:41,621 Yes! All right. 148 00:09:43,040 --> 00:09:47,043 How cool would it be if you could watch like a real life-size version of this? 149 00:09:47,211 --> 00:09:51,256 - I mean, how crazy would that be? - As crazy as soccer? 150 00:09:55,595 --> 00:09:56,636 Hello? 151 00:09:58,014 --> 00:10:01,182 What are you talking about? The audition's not till 5. 152 00:10:04,103 --> 00:10:05,979 Well, nobody told me. 153 00:10:06,647 --> 00:10:08,023 Who'd you talk to? 154 00:10:12,695 --> 00:10:14,070 Never mind. 155 00:10:14,905 --> 00:10:17,449 You mean you didn't get it from this? 156 00:10:17,992 --> 00:10:20,243 The allergy guy got the part. Thanks. 157 00:10:20,411 --> 00:10:22,120 Maybe we can fix it, you know? 158 00:10:22,288 --> 00:10:26,082 Maybe we can send him some big, big flowers and scare him! 159 00:10:26,917 --> 00:10:28,293 How could you do this to me? 160 00:10:28,461 --> 00:10:31,046 This part could've turned my whole career around. 161 00:10:31,213 --> 00:10:34,049 I messed up, okay? I'm sorry. I really messed up. 162 00:10:34,216 --> 00:10:37,177 You don't even live here anymore. Why'd you answer my phone? 163 00:10:37,345 --> 00:10:39,846 - I have a machine! - Which I bought for you. 164 00:10:41,098 --> 00:10:44,476 Taught you how to use it. You thought it was a copier. 165 00:10:45,728 --> 00:10:48,480 If there was anything I could do, I would do it, okay? 166 00:10:48,648 --> 00:10:51,775 But everybody's allowed one mistake, right? 167 00:10:51,942 --> 00:10:55,111 He could have gotten me a VCR. He could have gotten me golf clubs. 168 00:10:55,279 --> 00:10:57,697 But no, he has to get me the "woman repeller." 169 00:10:58,741 --> 00:11:01,117 The eyesore from the "Liberace House of Crap!" 170 00:11:02,078 --> 00:11:04,079 - It's not that bad. - Easy for you to say. 171 00:11:04,246 --> 00:11:07,290 You don't have to sport a reject from the "Mr. T Collection." 172 00:11:07,458 --> 00:11:08,792 Chandler. Chandler. 173 00:11:08,959 --> 00:11:12,253 I pity the fool who puts on my jewelry! I do! I do! 174 00:11:12,713 --> 00:11:14,005 I pity the fool that... 175 00:11:14,173 --> 00:11:15,799 Hi... 176 00:11:16,634 --> 00:11:20,095 When you were late last night, Kathy and I got to talking... 177 00:11:20,388 --> 00:11:23,348 ...and one thing led to another and... 178 00:11:23,516 --> 00:11:26,017 And what? Did you sleep with her? 179 00:11:26,185 --> 00:11:30,063 - No! No, I just kissed her. - What? That's even worse! 180 00:11:30,940 --> 00:11:33,817 - How is that worse? - I don't know! But it's the same! 181 00:11:33,984 --> 00:11:37,362 You're right, I have no excuses. I was totally over the line. 182 00:11:37,530 --> 00:11:38,697 "Over the line?" 183 00:11:38,864 --> 00:11:42,075 You're so far past the line that you can't even see the line! 184 00:11:42,243 --> 00:11:43,827 Yeah, the line is a dot to you! 185 00:11:45,162 --> 00:11:47,664 I'm not saying that you should magically forgive me. 186 00:11:47,832 --> 00:11:51,710 But you're not perfect. You've made some errors in judgment too. 187 00:11:52,002 --> 00:11:53,086 Name one. 188 00:11:54,505 --> 00:11:56,047 What happened? 189 00:11:56,632 --> 00:11:59,968 Aw, man! He promised he wouldn't take the chairs! 190 00:12:00,845 --> 00:12:03,221 What the hell happened? How were you locked in? 191 00:12:03,389 --> 00:12:05,306 And where the hell's all of our stuff? 192 00:12:05,766 --> 00:12:07,684 This guy came by to look at the unit... 193 00:12:07,852 --> 00:12:11,146 ...and he said he didn't think it was big enough to fit a grown man. 194 00:12:11,772 --> 00:12:14,441 So you got in voluntarily? 195 00:12:14,608 --> 00:12:16,568 I was trying to make a sale! 196 00:12:17,445 --> 00:12:20,822 Oh, man, if I ever run into that guy again, you know what I'm gonna do? 197 00:12:20,990 --> 00:12:22,741 Bend over? 198 00:12:23,409 --> 00:12:24,743 There's Lorraine. 199 00:12:24,910 --> 00:12:29,289 Okay, now remember, no trading. You get the pretty one, I get the mess. 200 00:12:29,498 --> 00:12:31,374 - Hi, Joey. - Hey. 201 00:12:34,170 --> 00:12:37,714 Well, well. Look what you brought. 202 00:12:37,882 --> 00:12:39,549 And what did you bring? 203 00:12:41,552 --> 00:12:43,428 She's checking her coat. 204 00:12:43,596 --> 00:12:46,890 Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cab smell off my hands. 205 00:12:47,057 --> 00:12:50,685 Will you get me a white Zinfandel and a glass of red for Janice? 206 00:12:55,608 --> 00:13:00,820 Janice? 207 00:13:01,405 --> 00:13:06,326 Oh, my God! 208 00:13:06,535 --> 00:13:09,746 Joey's tailor took advantage of me. 209 00:13:10,706 --> 00:13:11,748 What? 210 00:13:11,916 --> 00:13:15,418 No way. I've been going to the guy for 12 years. 211 00:13:15,586 --> 00:13:17,504 He said he was gonna do my inseam... 212 00:13:17,671 --> 00:13:21,466 ...then he ran his hand up my leg and then there was definite... 213 00:13:21,634 --> 00:13:22,801 What? 214 00:13:23,469 --> 00:13:25,261 Cupping. 215 00:13:28,098 --> 00:13:30,600 That's how they do pants! 216 00:13:32,561 --> 00:13:33,728 Ross, will you tell him? 217 00:13:33,896 --> 00:13:38,191 - Isn't that how a tailor measures pants? - Yes, yes, it is. In prison! 218 00:13:40,778 --> 00:13:42,111 I said name one! 219 00:13:49,787 --> 00:13:53,915 - I can't believe I did this. What an idiot. - Stop beating yourself up. 220 00:13:54,083 --> 00:13:56,751 People make mistakes. These things happen. 221 00:13:58,379 --> 00:14:02,048 There aren't any messages you've forgotten to give me, are there? 222 00:14:02,424 --> 00:14:04,926 Apparently, you're not very good at it. 223 00:14:05,427 --> 00:14:08,263 - Do you think he'll ever forgive me? - Of course he will. 224 00:14:08,430 --> 00:14:11,516 Chandler, the most important thing is that you forgive yourself. 225 00:14:11,809 --> 00:14:14,602 - You know what, I kind of have. - Already? 226 00:14:14,937 --> 00:14:16,688 That was pretty bad, what you did. 227 00:14:17,773 --> 00:14:19,649 You know what? He will forgive you. 228 00:14:19,817 --> 00:14:24,362 I like to bring a pad with me when I go answer the phone, just in case. Okay. 229 00:14:24,530 --> 00:14:26,489 You didn't see how mad he was, you know? 230 00:14:26,657 --> 00:14:28,283 I'm sure he will forgive you. 231 00:14:28,450 --> 00:14:31,411 Look, we've all been there, you know? You fight, you make up. 232 00:14:31,579 --> 00:14:32,829 That's the way it works. 233 00:14:32,997 --> 00:14:36,040 It took two people to break up this relationship! 234 00:14:36,208 --> 00:14:38,376 Yeah! You and that girl from the copy place... 235 00:14:38,544 --> 00:14:41,212 ...which yesterday you took full responsibility for! 236 00:14:41,505 --> 00:14:44,382 I didn't know what I was taking responsibility for, okay? 237 00:14:44,550 --> 00:14:46,342 I didn't finish the whole letter. 238 00:14:46,510 --> 00:14:48,219 - What? - I fell asleep. 239 00:14:48,387 --> 00:14:50,096 You fell asleep? 240 00:14:51,098 --> 00:14:54,058 It was 5:30 in the morning. 241 00:14:54,226 --> 00:15:00,356 And you had rambled on for 18 pages. 242 00:15:00,524 --> 00:15:03,151 Front and back! 243 00:15:04,528 --> 00:15:09,407 And by the way? Y-O-U, apostrophe R-E means, "you are." 244 00:15:09,575 --> 00:15:11,826 Y-O-U-R means "your." 245 00:15:12,328 --> 00:15:15,288 I can't believe I thought of getting back together with you. 246 00:15:15,456 --> 00:15:17,290 We are so over! 247 00:15:19,126 --> 00:15:20,418 Fine by me! 248 00:15:22,129 --> 00:15:25,340 And just so you know, it's not that common... 249 00:15:25,507 --> 00:15:28,843 ...it doesn't happen to every guy, and it is a big deal! 250 00:15:30,387 --> 00:15:31,888 I knew it! 251 00:15:33,098 --> 00:15:36,392 - You had no right to go out with him. - That is the most ridiculous... 252 00:15:36,810 --> 00:15:38,895 - You sold me out! - I did not sell you out! 253 00:15:39,188 --> 00:15:42,565 - Yes, you did! You absolutely sold me... - Would you let me talk? 254 00:15:45,194 --> 00:15:47,362 Did you just flick me? 255 00:15:48,405 --> 00:15:51,282 Okay, well, you wouldn't let me finish and I was just... Ow! 256 00:15:51,450 --> 00:15:53,910 - Stop it! Ow! - Ow! 257 00:15:54,078 --> 00:15:55,411 - Stop. - Stop. 258 00:15:55,579 --> 00:15:58,498 - All right. No, let's not do this. - No! 259 00:16:00,125 --> 00:16:02,001 - Happy thoughts. - No! 260 00:16:03,921 --> 00:16:06,297 - Stop it! - Oh! Oh! 261 00:16:06,465 --> 00:16:09,384 Okay, now I'm gonna kick some ass! 262 00:16:10,636 --> 00:16:12,845 - Ow! - Ow! 263 00:16:13,013 --> 00:16:15,682 - Ow. Ow. Ow. - I know, I know. 264 00:16:17,184 --> 00:16:22,063 All right. Now, I will let go if you both stop. 265 00:16:22,231 --> 00:16:23,898 - Fine. - Fine. 266 00:16:24,692 --> 00:16:26,025 There we go. 267 00:16:27,236 --> 00:16:31,781 Ha. You know what? If we were in prison, you guys would be like my bitches. 268 00:16:39,873 --> 00:16:42,083 Okay, buddy boy, here it is. 269 00:16:42,835 --> 00:16:46,546 You hide my clothes? I'm wearing everything you own. 270 00:16:47,089 --> 00:16:49,382 Oh, my God! 271 00:16:49,550 --> 00:16:54,387 Look at me, I'm Chandler! Could I be wearing any more clothes? 272 00:16:55,806 --> 00:16:58,266 Maybe if I wasn't going "commando." 273 00:17:01,478 --> 00:17:07,275 Whew. I tell you, it's hot with all this stuff on. I'd better not do any lunges. 274 00:17:59,661 --> 00:18:00,828 Joey? 275 00:18:01,955 --> 00:18:05,708 Got you the Joey special. Two pizzas! 276 00:18:06,668 --> 00:18:08,086 Joe? 277 00:18:09,755 --> 00:18:11,798 Hello? Damn it! 278 00:18:14,051 --> 00:18:15,093 Hello? 279 00:18:15,469 --> 00:18:19,222 No, Joey's not here right now, but I can take a message. I think. 280 00:18:20,474 --> 00:18:23,976 He's still got a chance for the part? That's great news! 281 00:18:24,269 --> 00:18:28,106 Well, no, obviously not for the actor who was mauled by his dog. 282 00:18:29,024 --> 00:18:32,110 Well, that's great. I will give Joey the message. Thank you. 283 00:18:32,277 --> 00:18:33,319 Yes! 284 00:18:34,696 --> 00:18:35,738 Okay. 285 00:18:36,198 --> 00:18:37,532 Mac... 286 00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:39,909 ...audition... 287 00:18:40,744 --> 00:18:42,703 ...at 2. 288 00:18:43,956 --> 00:18:45,373 Allergy... 289 00:18:45,916 --> 00:18:47,166 ...actor... 290 00:18:48,335 --> 00:18:49,919 ...attacked. 291 00:18:54,883 --> 00:18:57,260 By dog... 292 00:18:57,678 --> 00:18:59,095 ...not... 293 00:18:59,471 --> 00:19:01,055 ...flowers. 294 00:19:08,939 --> 00:19:12,150 - Hey. - Please tell me you got the message. 295 00:19:12,484 --> 00:19:15,111 - What message? - The actor playing Mac couldn't do it. 296 00:19:15,279 --> 00:19:19,115 - They needed to see you at 2:00. - What? It's 6:00! 297 00:19:19,408 --> 00:19:21,659 Look! I wrote it! I wrote it on the board! 298 00:19:21,827 --> 00:19:24,745 I wrote it on the board, then went looking all over for you! 299 00:19:24,913 --> 00:19:26,664 I went to Ross's, the coffee house. 300 00:19:26,832 --> 00:19:29,667 I went to any place that they make sandwiches! 301 00:19:30,294 --> 00:19:33,171 - I can't believe this, Chandler! - I'm sorry. 302 00:19:33,839 --> 00:19:35,214 I don't know what to say! 303 00:19:35,757 --> 00:19:38,885 You might say, "Congratulations." 304 00:19:39,052 --> 00:19:42,930 I saw the board, I went to the audition, I got the part! 305 00:19:43,640 --> 00:19:46,267 Was that supposed to be funny? I was worried over here. 306 00:19:46,435 --> 00:19:50,313 - I'm sorry. - At times that fake-out thing is mean. 307 00:19:50,480 --> 00:19:52,940 Okay, man. I'm sorry. I did not mean to make you feel bad. 308 00:19:53,108 --> 00:19:54,734 Well, that's good. 309 00:19:54,902 --> 00:19:58,112 Because you didn't. And I'm incredibly happy for you! 310 00:19:58,739 --> 00:20:00,448 That's mean! 311 00:20:02,242 --> 00:20:04,911 - You had me going there! - We could do this all day. 312 00:20:05,078 --> 00:20:06,621 Yeah, you're right. 313 00:20:07,331 --> 00:20:10,041 Look, let's talk about what a huge star I'm gonna be. 314 00:20:10,209 --> 00:20:12,418 You are gonna be a huge star. I'm gonna hug you. 315 00:20:12,586 --> 00:20:14,253 - You hug me. - All right. 316 00:20:43,325 --> 00:20:46,160 - Do we do this too much? - I think so. 317 00:20:46,370 --> 00:20:48,329 - Yeah. Get off me. - Yeah. 318 00:20:56,338 --> 00:20:58,881 "Come on, C.H.E.E.S.E., I'm not leaving without you. 319 00:20:59,049 --> 00:21:02,218 Try routing your backup power source through your primary CPU." 320 00:21:02,386 --> 00:21:07,014 "I can't! My circuits are fried! They're fried, I tell you!" 321 00:21:09,101 --> 00:21:10,643 Wow. 322 00:21:11,228 --> 00:21:13,312 "Well, then I'll just have to carry you." 323 00:21:13,480 --> 00:21:15,481 "That'll be a neat trick... 324 00:21:15,649 --> 00:21:19,318 ...when you're dead!" 325 00:21:20,362 --> 00:21:22,071 Ross, you don't have to yell. 326 00:21:22,239 --> 00:21:26,367 There was just an explosion, okay? My hearing would be impaired. 327 00:21:27,494 --> 00:21:28,911 I thought you were excellent. 328 00:21:29,079 --> 00:21:32,081 In fact, for a minute there, I was like, "Ooh, where did Ross go?" 329 00:21:33,333 --> 00:21:37,003 Thank you. And I have to say that first scene where you meet Mac... 330 00:21:37,170 --> 00:21:39,297 - Yeah. - Oh, my God. I mean... 331 00:21:39,464 --> 00:21:40,589 You know what? 332 00:21:40,757 --> 00:21:43,843 I think that's enough for today. Thanks for your help. 333 00:21:46,221 --> 00:21:48,556 - Holding us back. - Totally.