1
00:00:06,548 --> 00:00:08,882
Oh, look, look!
There's Joey's picture!

2
00:00:09,092 --> 00:00:10,426
This is so exciting!

3
00:00:10,635 --> 00:00:13,554
You can spot someone who's
never seen his plays.

4
00:00:13,805 --> 00:00:16,306
Notice, no fear.
No sense of impending doom.

5
00:00:16,516 --> 00:00:18,726
The exclamation point scares me.

6
00:00:18,977 --> 00:00:21,228
It's not just Freud,
it's Freud!

7
00:00:21,980 --> 00:00:24,356
ROSS:
Shh. Magic is about to happen!

8
00:00:25,316 --> 00:00:26,984
JOEY [IN GERMAN ACCENT]:
Well, Eva...

9
00:00:27,777 --> 00:00:30,863
...we've done
some excellent work here.

10
00:00:32,157 --> 00:00:33,866
And I would have to say...

11
00:00:34,409 --> 00:00:38,162
...your problem is quite clear.

12
00:00:38,371 --> 00:00:39,788
[ZANY PIANO MUSIC PLAYS]

13
00:00:39,998 --> 00:00:43,208
[SINGING]
All you want is a dinkle

14
00:00:43,585 --> 00:00:46,462
What you envy's a schwang

15
00:00:46,671 --> 00:00:50,007
A thing through which you can tinkle

16
00:00:50,216 --> 00:00:52,885
To play with or simply let hang

17
00:01:39,933 --> 00:01:42,434
[AUDIENCE CHEERS]
[ZANY PIANO MUSIC PLAYING]

18
00:01:47,607 --> 00:01:49,358
[ALL GROAN]

19
00:01:51,277 --> 00:01:53,403
I feel violated.

20
00:01:54,197 --> 00:01:57,324
Did anybody else feel like
peeling their skin off...

21
00:01:57,534 --> 00:01:59,451
...to have something else to do?

22
00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:01,161
Ross, 10:00.

23
00:02:01,412 --> 00:02:03,205
Is it? It feels like 2.

24
00:02:04,541 --> 00:02:06,333
No, 10:00!

25
00:02:08,294 --> 00:02:12,172
There's a beautiful woman
at 8, 9, 10:00!

26
00:02:14,342 --> 00:02:15,509
ROSS:
Hello!

27
00:02:15,760 --> 00:02:16,760
She's amazing!

28
00:02:16,970 --> 00:02:20,597
She makes the women I dream about
look like short, fat, bald men.

29
00:02:21,808 --> 00:02:23,517
Go over to her.
She's not with anyone.

30
00:02:23,726 --> 00:02:25,561
And what would my opening line be?

31
00:02:25,812 --> 00:02:26,812
Excuse me...

32
00:02:27,021 --> 00:02:28,063
[BABBLES]

33
00:02:29,774 --> 00:02:32,109
Come on, she's a person.
You can do it.

34
00:02:32,318 --> 00:02:35,320
Could she be more out of my league?
Ross, back me up.

35
00:02:35,530 --> 00:02:38,448
He could never get a woman
like that in a million years.

36
00:02:40,535 --> 00:02:44,329
But you always see these beautiful
women with these "nothing" guys.

37
00:02:44,581 --> 00:02:46,582
You could be one of those guys.

38
00:02:47,584 --> 00:02:49,418
- You could do that.
- You think?

39
00:02:49,669 --> 00:02:50,669
RACHEL:
Absolutely!

40
00:02:50,879 --> 00:02:53,380
I can't believe
I'm even considering this.

41
00:02:53,631 --> 00:02:56,216
- I'm very aware of my tongue.
- Come on.

42
00:02:56,467 --> 00:02:57,676
Here goes.

43
00:03:02,932 --> 00:03:04,057
Yes?

44
00:03:04,392 --> 00:03:06,393
Hi. Um... Ahem.

45
00:03:06,603 --> 00:03:08,604
Okay, next word would be...

46
00:03:08,813 --> 00:03:09,855
...uh, Chandler.

47
00:03:11,024 --> 00:03:12,941
Chandler is my name and, uh...

48
00:03:13,151 --> 00:03:14,151
[CLEARS THROAT]

49
00:03:14,360 --> 00:03:15,736
Hi!

50
00:03:17,322 --> 00:03:18,739
Yes, you said that.

51
00:03:18,990 --> 00:03:21,950
Yes! Yes, I did.
But what I didn't say...

52
00:03:22,160 --> 00:03:24,244
What I wanted to say was, uh...

53
00:03:24,454 --> 00:03:27,664
...would you like to go out with me?
Thank you. Good night.

54
00:03:28,333 --> 00:03:29,541
Chandler?

55
00:03:32,128 --> 00:03:33,128
PHOEBE:
There he is!

56
00:03:33,338 --> 00:03:36,423
ROSS: I didn't know you could dance!
RACHEL: You were in a play!

57
00:03:36,633 --> 00:03:38,091
What'd you think?

58
00:03:39,010 --> 00:03:42,137
ROSS: I didn't know you could dance!
RACHEL: You were in a play!

59
00:03:42,347 --> 00:03:45,015
Come on, it wasn't that bad.
I was the lead.

60
00:03:45,225 --> 00:03:48,477
It was better than the troll thing.
At least you got to see my head.

61
00:03:49,604 --> 00:03:51,813
RACHEL: You're right.
ROSS: We saw your head.

62
00:03:52,023 --> 00:03:53,565
She said yes! She said yes!

63
00:03:53,775 --> 00:03:54,775
MONICA:
Wow!

64
00:03:54,984 --> 00:03:57,361
Awful play, man! Whoa!

65
00:03:59,322 --> 00:04:03,575
Her name's Aurora. She's Italian
and she pronounces my name "Chandler."

66
00:04:05,662 --> 00:04:08,789
I like that better.
The usher gave me this to give to you.

67
00:04:08,998 --> 00:04:12,084
- What is it?
- The Estelle Leonard Talent Agency.

68
00:04:12,293 --> 00:04:15,128
An agency left me its card.
Maybe they wanna sign me!

69
00:04:15,338 --> 00:04:16,505
Based on this play?

70
00:04:19,133 --> 00:04:21,134
Based on this play!

71
00:04:30,103 --> 00:04:31,186
Hey, kids!

72
00:04:31,396 --> 00:04:32,396
ROSS:
Hey, Chandler.

73
00:04:32,605 --> 00:04:36,024
No, because this line is passion,
and this is just a line.

74
00:04:36,359 --> 00:04:40,070
I've been here seven seconds, and you
haven't asked me how my date went.

75
00:04:41,114 --> 00:04:43,740
How was your date, Chandler?

76
00:04:43,950 --> 00:04:45,200
It was unbelievable!

77
00:04:45,410 --> 00:04:49,037
I've never met anyone like her.
She's had the most amazing life!

78
00:04:49,247 --> 00:04:50,914
CHANDLER:
She was in the Israeli army.

79
00:04:51,124 --> 00:04:53,208
None of the bullets hit
the engine block...

80
00:04:53,459 --> 00:04:55,836
...so we made it to the border.

81
00:04:56,045 --> 00:04:57,963
But just barely and I...

82
00:04:59,048 --> 00:05:02,968
I've been talking about myself
all night long. I'm sorry.

83
00:05:03,177 --> 00:05:05,262
What about you?
Tell me your stories.

84
00:05:06,139 --> 00:05:07,347
All right, once...

85
00:05:07,598 --> 00:05:10,309
...once I got on the subway, right?

86
00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:12,185
And it was at night...

87
00:05:12,437 --> 00:05:15,063
...and I rode it
all the way to Brooklyn...

88
00:05:15,982 --> 00:05:17,774
...just for the hell of it.

89
00:05:18,609 --> 00:05:21,194
We talked till 2.
It was this perfect evening.

90
00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:23,363
More or less.

91
00:05:23,573 --> 00:05:25,949
Suddenly, we realized
we were in Yemen.

92
00:05:26,367 --> 00:05:27,951
I'm sorry, so "we" is?

93
00:05:28,828 --> 00:05:30,078
"We" is me and Rick.

94
00:05:30,288 --> 00:05:32,748
- Who's Rick?
- Who's Rick?

95
00:05:33,958 --> 00:05:35,000
My husband.

96
00:05:35,251 --> 00:05:36,335
ALL:
Ooh.

97
00:05:37,462 --> 00:05:39,838
- Oh, so you're divorced?
- No.

98
00:05:40,798 --> 00:05:44,051
I'm sorry. So you're widowed?
Hopefully?

99
00:05:45,303 --> 00:05:46,720
No, I'm still married.

100
00:05:48,514 --> 00:05:52,809
So how would your husband feel
about you sitting here with me...

101
00:05:53,311 --> 00:05:55,479
...sliding your foot
so far up my leg...

102
00:05:55,688 --> 00:05:58,231
...you can count
the change in my pocket?

103
00:05:59,942 --> 00:06:01,193
Don't worry.

104
00:06:01,402 --> 00:06:04,404
I imagine he'd be okay with you
because he's okay with Ethan.

105
00:06:05,948 --> 00:06:08,367
Ethan? There's an Ethan?

106
00:06:09,577 --> 00:06:11,453
Ethan is my...

107
00:06:11,871 --> 00:06:12,913
...boyfriend.

108
00:06:13,247 --> 00:06:14,331
ALL:
What?

109
00:06:16,459 --> 00:06:19,336
So, uh, what kind of relationship
do you imagine us having...

110
00:06:19,545 --> 00:06:22,130
...if you already have
a husband and a boyfriend?

111
00:06:23,049 --> 00:06:25,550
I suppose, mainly sexual.

112
00:06:26,886 --> 00:06:27,928
Huh.

113
00:06:29,180 --> 00:06:30,806
I'm sorry it didn't work out.

114
00:06:31,182 --> 00:06:34,309
What not work out?
I'm seeing her again on Thursday.

115
00:06:34,685 --> 00:06:40,357
Didn't you listen to the story?

116
00:06:40,566 --> 00:06:43,276
How could you get involved
with a woman like this?

117
00:06:43,528 --> 00:06:46,947
I had trouble with it at first,
but I get all the good stuff.

118
00:06:47,156 --> 00:06:50,575
All the fun, all the talking,
all the sex...

119
00:06:50,785 --> 00:06:52,452
...and no responsibility.

120
00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:55,872
This is every guy's fantasy!

121
00:06:56,082 --> 00:06:58,625
That is not true.
Ross, is this your fantasy?

122
00:06:58,876 --> 00:07:00,585
No, of course not.

123
00:07:02,880 --> 00:07:04,714
Yeah. Yeah, it is.

124
00:07:05,466 --> 00:07:09,136
You'd go out with someone else
who's going out with someone else?

125
00:07:09,429 --> 00:07:10,470
I couldn't.

126
00:07:10,680 --> 00:07:11,721
Good for you.

127
00:07:12,014 --> 00:07:14,182
When I'm with a woman,
I need to know...

128
00:07:14,392 --> 00:07:17,269
...that I'm going out
with more people than she is.

129
00:07:17,812 --> 00:07:18,854
You know...

130
00:07:19,063 --> 00:07:22,065
...monogamy can be a tricky concept.

131
00:07:22,275 --> 00:07:23,608
I mean, anthropologically...

132
00:07:23,818 --> 00:07:24,860
[ALL SNORING]

133
00:07:26,529 --> 00:07:28,530
Fine. Now you'll never know.

134
00:07:28,781 --> 00:07:30,365
We're kidding. Tell us.

135
00:07:30,575 --> 00:07:32,200
MONICA: We wanna know.
JOEY: Come on!

136
00:07:32,410 --> 00:07:36,204
All right. There's a theory
put forth by Richard Leakey...

137
00:07:36,456 --> 00:07:37,831
[ALL SNORING]
[ROSS GROANS]

138
00:07:45,256 --> 00:07:46,339
Ta-da!

139
00:07:47,467 --> 00:07:50,510
Are we greeting each other
this way now? I like that.

140
00:07:52,180 --> 00:07:53,847
Look! I cleaned!

141
00:07:54,056 --> 00:07:56,308
I did the windows.
I did the floors.

142
00:07:56,517 --> 00:07:59,853
I used all the attachments on
the vacuum except for that round one.

143
00:08:00,062 --> 00:08:01,480
I don't know what it's for.

144
00:08:01,731 --> 00:08:03,899
Nobody knows, and we're
not supposed to ask.

145
00:08:05,109 --> 00:08:06,318
RACHEL:
What do you think?

146
00:08:06,569 --> 00:08:09,279
CHANDLER: It's very clean.
MONICA: Really, it looks great!

147
00:08:12,366 --> 00:08:16,369
Oh. Heh.
I see you moved the green ottoman.

148
00:08:16,662 --> 00:08:18,371
ROSS & PHOEBE:
Uh-oh.

149
00:08:20,291 --> 00:08:21,791
How did that happen?

150
00:08:23,252 --> 00:08:25,712
I don't know.
I thought it looked better there.

151
00:08:25,963 --> 00:08:29,257
And also, it's an extra seat
around the coffee table.

152
00:08:29,884 --> 00:08:31,801
Yeah, it's interesting.

153
00:08:33,346 --> 00:08:35,472
But you know what? Just for fun...

154
00:08:35,973 --> 00:08:39,434
...let's see what it looked like
in the old spot.

155
00:08:40,144 --> 00:08:41,937
Just to compare.

156
00:08:42,146 --> 00:08:43,647
Let's see. Ha!

157
00:08:43,856 --> 00:08:45,732
Well, it looks good there too.

158
00:08:46,275 --> 00:08:48,318
Let's leave it there for a while.

159
00:08:49,320 --> 00:08:52,155
I can't believe you tried
to move the green ottoman.

160
00:08:53,282 --> 00:08:55,492
Thank God you didn't
fan out the magazines.

161
00:08:55,701 --> 00:08:57,577
She'll scratch your eyes out.

162
00:08:57,828 --> 00:08:59,663
You guys, I am not that bad!

163
00:08:59,872 --> 00:09:01,122
Yeah, you are.

164
00:09:02,542 --> 00:09:04,042
Remember, I lived with you?

165
00:09:04,293 --> 00:09:05,710
You were a little, you know...

166
00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:07,546
[MIMICS STABBING SOUND
FROM "PSYCHO"]

167
00:09:10,132 --> 00:09:11,424
That is so unfair!

168
00:09:11,634 --> 00:09:15,470
When we were kids, yours was the only
Raggedy Ann doll that wasn't raggedy.

169
00:09:18,307 --> 00:09:20,934
Okay, so I'm responsible.
I'm organized.

170
00:09:21,143 --> 00:09:22,978
But, hey, I can be a kook!

171
00:09:25,356 --> 00:09:27,440
All right, you madcap gal!

172
00:09:29,193 --> 00:09:30,360
Try to imagine this.

173
00:09:30,570 --> 00:09:34,281
The phone bill arrives,
but you don't pay it right away.

174
00:09:34,532 --> 00:09:37,117
- Why not?
- Because you're a kook!

175
00:09:39,245 --> 00:09:41,997
Instead, you wait until
they send you a notice.

176
00:09:42,915 --> 00:09:44,124
I could do that.

177
00:09:44,333 --> 00:09:48,295
Okay, then you let me
go grocery shopping...

178
00:09:48,504 --> 00:09:50,297
...and I buy laundry detergent.

179
00:09:50,631 --> 00:09:53,967
But it's not the one
with the easy-pour spout.

180
00:09:54,176 --> 00:09:55,802
Why would someone do that?

181
00:09:58,097 --> 00:10:00,140
One might wonder.

182
00:10:00,433 --> 00:10:03,101
A glass is on the table.
There's no coaster.

183
00:10:03,352 --> 00:10:05,145
It's a cold drink. It's a hot day.

184
00:10:05,855 --> 00:10:10,150
Beads of condensation are inching
their way closer to the wood...

185
00:10:10,401 --> 00:10:11,443
Stop it!

186
00:10:15,156 --> 00:10:16,448
Oh, my God!

187
00:10:16,907 --> 00:10:18,825
It's true. Who am I?

188
00:10:19,327 --> 00:10:21,369
Monica, you're Mom.

189
00:10:22,622 --> 00:10:24,789
[MIMICS STABBING SOUND
FROM "PSYCHO"]

190
00:10:28,711 --> 00:10:30,795
JOEY:
Uh-huh? Oh, my God!

191
00:10:31,797 --> 00:10:33,048
Okay.

192
00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:35,175
Okay, I'll be there.

193
00:10:37,553 --> 00:10:39,137
That was my agent.

194
00:10:41,098 --> 00:10:45,852
My agent has just gotten me a job
in the new Al Pacino movie!

195
00:10:46,687 --> 00:10:48,647
CHANDLER:
Whoa! That's great!

196
00:10:48,981 --> 00:10:50,023
What's the part?

197
00:10:50,232 --> 00:10:52,275
Can you believe this?
Al Pacino!

198
00:10:52,526 --> 00:10:54,361
This guy's why I became an actor.

199
00:10:54,570 --> 00:10:56,905
"I'm out of order?
You're out of order!

200
00:10:57,156 --> 00:10:59,991
This whole courtroom's out of order!"

201
00:11:01,035 --> 00:11:02,702
Seriously, what's the part?

202
00:11:02,953 --> 00:11:06,623
"Just when I thought I was out,
they pull me back in!"

203
00:11:06,957 --> 00:11:10,001
Come on. Seriously,
Joey, what's the part?

204
00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:11,544
[MUMBLES]

205
00:11:11,962 --> 00:11:13,546
You're, you're...
What?

206
00:11:16,133 --> 00:11:18,510
I'm his butt double, okay?

207
00:11:22,932 --> 00:11:25,475
I play Al Pacino's butt.

208
00:11:27,728 --> 00:11:30,980
All right? He goes
into the shower, and then...

209
00:11:31,232 --> 00:11:32,732
...I'm his butt.

210
00:11:33,609 --> 00:11:34,818
Oh, my God!

211
00:11:35,111 --> 00:11:36,277
Come on, you guys.

212
00:11:36,529 --> 00:11:39,823
This is a real movie,
and Al Pacino's in it and that's big!

213
00:11:40,074 --> 00:11:41,491
Oh, no, it's terrific.

214
00:11:41,701 --> 00:11:43,910
After all your years of struggling...

215
00:11:44,120 --> 00:11:47,330
...you've finally been able
to crack your way into show business.

216
00:11:50,501 --> 00:11:52,877
Okay, fine.
Make jokes, I don't care.

217
00:11:53,129 --> 00:11:54,546
This is a big break for me!

218
00:11:54,797 --> 00:11:56,423
You're right. It is.

219
00:11:57,633 --> 00:12:00,468
So are you gonna invite us all
to the big opening?

220
00:12:07,727 --> 00:12:09,018
[KNOCK ON DOOR]

221
00:12:12,356 --> 00:12:15,066
- I need to borrow some moisturizer.
- For what?

222
00:12:15,276 --> 00:12:17,277
What do you think?
Today's the big day!

223
00:12:17,820 --> 00:12:20,655
Okay, go into the bathroom.
Use whatever you want.

224
00:12:20,865 --> 00:12:23,575
Just don't ever tell me
what you did in there.

225
00:12:24,034 --> 00:12:25,076
JOEY:
Thank you.

226
00:12:28,038 --> 00:12:30,123
- Joey's mom's on the phone.
- He's in the bathroom.

227
00:12:30,332 --> 00:12:33,793
- You don't wanna go in there!
- Come on, we're roommates.

228
00:12:34,211 --> 00:12:35,253
[CHANDLER YELLS]

229
00:12:35,504 --> 00:12:38,006
My eyes! My eyes!

230
00:12:40,551 --> 00:12:42,051
MONICA:
I warned you.

231
00:12:42,303 --> 00:12:44,095
Who is being loud?

232
00:12:44,305 --> 00:12:46,306
Oh, that would be Monica.

233
00:12:46,849 --> 00:12:49,642
Can I borrow some things?
I wanna make Aurora breakfast.

234
00:12:49,894 --> 00:12:51,644
You got the whole night, huh?

235
00:12:51,896 --> 00:12:55,190
Well, I only have 20 minutes
until Ethan, so...

236
00:12:55,441 --> 00:12:57,358
Do I sense a bit of resentment?

237
00:12:57,610 --> 00:13:00,695
No, no, no. No resentment.
Believe me...

238
00:13:00,946 --> 00:13:03,031
...it's worth it, okay?

239
00:13:03,240 --> 00:13:05,450
In a relationship,
you have these key moments...

240
00:13:05,659 --> 00:13:08,119
...you'll remember
for the rest of your life.

241
00:13:08,370 --> 00:13:11,581
Well, every single second
is like that with Aurora.

242
00:13:11,832 --> 00:13:14,334
And I've just wasted
35 of them talking to you.

243
00:13:14,543 --> 00:13:17,796
So, uh, Monica, can you
help me with the door?

244
00:13:18,047 --> 00:13:21,508
Um, Chandler, you know, the old Monica
would remind you...

245
00:13:21,717 --> 00:13:25,512
...to scrub that Teflon pan
with a plastic brush.

246
00:13:26,931 --> 00:13:28,848
But I'm not gonna do that.

247
00:13:34,730 --> 00:13:36,981
DIRECTOR:
Damn it! Hire the girl.

248
00:13:38,108 --> 00:13:39,317
Okay, everybody ready?

249
00:13:40,069 --> 00:13:43,738
Uh, listen, I just wanna thank you
for this great opportunity.

250
00:13:44,990 --> 00:13:46,032
Lose the robe.

251
00:13:47,117 --> 00:13:48,159
Me?

252
00:13:48,410 --> 00:13:49,661
That would work.

253
00:13:50,162 --> 00:13:53,039
Right. Okay.
Losing the robe!

254
00:13:54,542 --> 00:13:56,501
Okay, and the robe is lost.

255
00:13:57,294 --> 00:14:00,088
Everybody, I would like
to get this in one take.

256
00:14:00,297 --> 00:14:01,631
Let's roll it.

257
00:14:01,841 --> 00:14:03,258
Water's working.

258
00:14:04,051 --> 00:14:05,844
And action!

259
00:14:07,930 --> 00:14:09,347
And cut!

260
00:14:10,182 --> 00:14:11,641
Butt guy, what are you doing?

261
00:14:13,143 --> 00:14:14,352
I'm showering.

262
00:14:14,895 --> 00:14:16,354
No, that was clenching.

263
00:14:17,189 --> 00:14:20,984
Well, the way I see it,
the guy's upset here, you know?

264
00:14:21,235 --> 00:14:23,486
His wife's dead,
his brother's missing.

265
00:14:23,696 --> 00:14:26,406
I think his butt would be angry here.

266
00:14:27,324 --> 00:14:30,076
I think his butt would like
to get the shot before lunch.

267
00:14:31,036 --> 00:14:33,913
Once again, rolling.
Water working.

268
00:14:34,915 --> 00:14:36,833
And action!

269
00:14:38,168 --> 00:14:40,587
And cut! What was that?

270
00:14:41,922 --> 00:14:44,299
I was going for quiet desperation.

271
00:14:45,676 --> 00:14:48,511
But if you have to ask...

272
00:14:55,227 --> 00:14:57,061
God, I love these fingers.

273
00:14:57,313 --> 00:14:58,479
Thank you.

274
00:14:58,689 --> 00:15:01,232
No, actually, I meant my fingers.

275
00:15:02,318 --> 00:15:04,777
Look at them.
Look at how happy they are.

276
00:15:06,822 --> 00:15:09,824
- Oh, my God, I'm late!
- Oh, no, no, no.

277
00:15:10,075 --> 00:15:12,994
- Don't go, don't go.
- Okay, okay.

278
00:15:13,954 --> 00:15:15,914
- I have to.
- Look, she's leaving.

279
00:15:16,665 --> 00:15:19,208
I'm sorry.
He'll be waiting for me.

280
00:15:19,418 --> 00:15:21,044
I thought you talked to Rick.

281
00:15:21,295 --> 00:15:23,171
It's not Rick.

282
00:15:23,380 --> 00:15:25,506
Ethan? He gets
the whole day with you!

283
00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:27,425
No, it's Andrew.

284
00:15:33,015 --> 00:15:35,016
I know there'll be many moments...

285
00:15:35,225 --> 00:15:38,561
...when I'll regret asking
the following question, but...

286
00:15:39,396 --> 00:15:40,813
And Andrew is?

287
00:15:41,023 --> 00:15:43,149
He's... new.

288
00:15:44,360 --> 00:15:48,655
So you're not completely fulfilled
by Rick, Ethan and myself?

289
00:15:48,864 --> 00:15:51,324
No, that's not exactly what I was...

290
00:15:51,533 --> 00:15:53,368
Most women would kill...

291
00:15:53,619 --> 00:15:55,662
...for three guys like us.

292
00:15:57,122 --> 00:15:58,414
So, what do you want?

293
00:15:59,124 --> 00:16:00,166
You.

294
00:16:00,459 --> 00:16:03,211
- You have me.
- No, no. Just you.

295
00:16:03,587 --> 00:16:04,629
What do you mean?

296
00:16:04,880 --> 00:16:06,714
Lose the other guys.

297
00:16:08,759 --> 00:16:10,468
Like, all of them?

298
00:16:11,178 --> 00:16:14,138
Come on, we're great together.
Why not?

299
00:16:14,598 --> 00:16:16,516
Why can't we just have
what we have now?

300
00:16:16,725 --> 00:16:19,060
Why can't we just talk,
laugh and make love...

301
00:16:19,311 --> 00:16:22,105
...without feeling obligated
to one another?

302
00:16:22,523 --> 00:16:26,109
Up until tonight, I thought
that's what you wanted too.

303
00:16:27,319 --> 00:16:29,237
Well, part of me wants that...

304
00:16:29,446 --> 00:16:31,656
...but it's like I'm two guys.

305
00:16:31,907 --> 00:16:34,867
I mean, one guy's saying,
"Shut up! This is great!"

306
00:16:35,995 --> 00:16:37,745
But there's this other guy.

307
00:16:37,955 --> 00:16:40,957
It's the guy who wells up
every time the Grinch's heart...

308
00:16:41,208 --> 00:16:44,043
...grows three sizes
and breaks that measuring device.

309
00:16:44,712 --> 00:16:48,840
He's saying, you know,
"This is too hard. Get out, get out!"

310
00:16:49,758 --> 00:16:52,552
So which one of the two guys
will you listen to?

311
00:16:53,721 --> 00:16:57,348
I have to listen to both.
They don't let each other finish.

312
00:16:59,018 --> 00:17:00,059
Which one?

313
00:17:03,981 --> 00:17:05,023
The second guy.

314
00:17:06,859 --> 00:17:07,900
I see.

315
00:17:12,781 --> 00:17:14,907
Call me if you change your mind.

316
00:17:23,667 --> 00:17:26,794
Sorry, the first guy runs the lips.

317
00:17:39,641 --> 00:17:42,518
Look at it this way.
You dumped her!

318
00:17:43,979 --> 00:17:46,147
Right? I mean, this woman was...

319
00:17:46,356 --> 00:17:47,982
...unbelievably sexy...

320
00:17:48,233 --> 00:17:51,569
...and beautiful,
intelligent, unattainable...

321
00:17:53,781 --> 00:17:55,782
Tell me why you did this again?

322
00:17:56,867 --> 00:17:57,950
ROSS: Hey!
MONICA: Hey!

323
00:17:58,202 --> 00:17:59,619
RACHEL:
Movie star!

324
00:17:59,828 --> 00:18:03,498
Aren't you the guy who plays
the butt in the new Al Pacino movie?

325
00:18:05,667 --> 00:18:06,709
Nope.

326
00:18:07,127 --> 00:18:09,545
No? What happened, big guy?

327
00:18:09,797 --> 00:18:11,214
Big guy?

328
00:18:13,383 --> 00:18:15,593
It felt like a "big guy" moment.

329
00:18:16,553 --> 00:18:17,595
I got fired!

330
00:18:18,847 --> 00:18:20,765
They said I acted too much with it.

331
00:18:23,602 --> 00:18:25,436
I told everybody about this.

332
00:18:25,646 --> 00:18:27,605
Everybody will be
expecting to see me.

333
00:18:27,856 --> 00:18:30,399
You know what?
No one will be able to tell.

334
00:18:30,692 --> 00:18:32,276
My mom will.

335
00:18:34,196 --> 00:18:36,280
There's something so sweet...

336
00:18:36,532 --> 00:18:38,741
...and disturbing about that.

337
00:18:40,035 --> 00:18:42,954
I've done nothing
but crappy plays for six years...

338
00:18:43,205 --> 00:18:46,207
...and I finally get my shot,
and I blow it!

339
00:18:46,416 --> 00:18:48,167
Maybe this wasn't your shot.

340
00:18:48,377 --> 00:18:52,922
I think when it's your shot,
you know it's your shot.

341
00:18:53,590 --> 00:18:56,050
Did it feel like your shot?

342
00:18:57,469 --> 00:19:00,054
Hard to tell. I was naked.

343
00:19:00,305 --> 00:19:01,889
I don't think this was your shot.

344
00:19:02,099 --> 00:19:04,392
I don't even think
you just get one shot.

345
00:19:04,601 --> 00:19:07,979
I really believe big things are
gonna happen for you. I do.

346
00:19:08,230 --> 00:19:12,108
You've gotta keep thinking about
the day that some kid will go...

347
00:19:12,317 --> 00:19:15,987
..."I got the part! I'm gonna be
Joey Tribbiani's ass!"

348
00:19:19,283 --> 00:19:21,909
You think? That's so nice.

349
00:19:23,287 --> 00:19:24,704
Oh, come here.

350
00:19:28,250 --> 00:19:30,835
I'm sorry, Joey.
I'm gonna go to bed, guys.

351
00:19:31,086 --> 00:19:32,128
ROSS:
Good night.

352
00:19:32,504 --> 00:19:34,714
RACHEL: You're gonna leave
your shoes out here?

353
00:19:36,925 --> 00:19:38,342
Uh-huh.

354
00:19:39,887 --> 00:19:43,181
Really? Just casually
strewn about...

355
00:19:43,390 --> 00:19:45,683
...in that reckless,
haphazard manner?

356
00:19:47,603 --> 00:19:51,314
It doesn't matter.
I'll get them tomorrow. Or not!

357
00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:54,233
Whenever.

358
00:19:56,904 --> 00:19:59,655
She is a kook.

359
00:20:07,206 --> 00:20:09,290
[HUMMING]

360
00:20:13,378 --> 00:20:17,465
MONICA [THINKING]: If it bothers you
that much, just go out and get the shoes.

361
00:20:19,051 --> 00:20:21,636
No, don't do this!

362
00:20:21,887 --> 00:20:23,304
This is stupid!

363
00:20:23,555 --> 00:20:26,641
I don't have to prove anything.
I'm gonna go get them.

364
00:20:27,434 --> 00:20:29,185
But then everyone will know.

365
00:20:30,687 --> 00:20:34,982
Unless I get them, and then wake up
really early and put them back.

366
00:20:35,359 --> 00:20:36,943
I need help!

367
00:20:42,157 --> 00:20:44,158
[English - US - SDH]