1
00:00:01,400 --> 00:00:03,830
Oh, Niles, good.
2
00:00:03,116 --> 00:00:05,433
Look, I know
it's your day off,
but I need you to work.
3
00:00:05,466 --> 00:00:08,383
I need you to
run this ad copy
4
00:00:08,416 --> 00:00:10,383
-down to John Kennedy's
office for me.
-All right.
5
00:00:10,416 --> 00:00:12,216
John John?
6
00:00:12,250 --> 00:00:14,116
You know,
it's his day off.
7
00:00:14,150 --> 00:00:16,183
Would you stop being
such a slave driver?
8
00:00:16,216 --> 00:00:17,483
I'll take it to him.
9
00:00:18,160 --> 00:00:19,100
And what's more,
I'll make sure
10
00:00:19,133 --> 00:00:21,216
that John John
signs for it personally.
11
00:00:21,250 --> 00:00:23,116
Oh, that isn't
necessary, Miss Fine.
12
00:00:23,150 --> 00:00:25,183
Oh, yes, it is.
13
00:00:26,466 --> 00:00:28,100
Who's coming over?
14
00:00:28,133 --> 00:00:29,150
Elizabeth Taylor.
15
00:00:29,183 --> 00:00:33,660
Oh, beautifully executed,
sir.
16
00:00:33,100 --> 00:00:35,483
-Where's Mr. Kennedy?
-In Singapore.
17
00:00:36,160 --> 00:00:37,283
Think she'll wait for him?
18
00:00:37,316 --> 00:00:38,350
[BOTH LAUGH]
19
00:00:38,383 --> 00:00:41,200
Very good, sir.
Very, very good.
20
00:00:43,266 --> 00:00:47,200
Boys, boys, boys.
21
00:00:47,233 --> 00:00:49,283
Now, do you think
that my mother
22
00:00:49,316 --> 00:00:53,266
gave birth to a dummy
25 years ago?
23
00:00:54,433 --> 00:00:57,266
You two wouldn't let
me
near George Kennedy,
24
00:00:57,300 --> 00:00:59,416
let alone John.
25
00:00:59,450 --> 00:01:01,150
Now who's coming
over here?
26
00:01:01,183 --> 00:01:03,133
Well, it doesn't
really matter, Miss Fine,
27
00:01:03,166 --> 00:01:06,333
because you are not
going to meet her,
him or it.
28
00:01:06,366 --> 00:01:09,433
Oh, you know,
I cannot believe
that you don't trust me.
29
00:01:09,466 --> 00:01:12,233
I mean, I sit here
cooped up in the house
all day long.
30
00:01:12,266 --> 00:01:15,133
You never introduce me
to any of the stars
that you know.
31
00:01:15,166 --> 00:01:16,466
You never let me in
any of your shows.
32
00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:20,333
I have a good mind
to go get Little Ricky
and, oh...
33
00:01:23,200 --> 00:01:25,500
Nanny Fine,
34
00:01:25,830 --> 00:01:27,216
I need you
to drop off
this script
35
00:01:27,250 --> 00:01:31,116
to Antonio Banderas.
36
00:01:31,150 --> 00:01:32,416
Forget it, Miss Babcock.
37
00:01:32,450 --> 00:01:35,200
I already know who's
coming over here
this afternoon.
38
00:01:35,233 --> 00:01:38,466
-C.C...
-You told her about
Elizabeth Taylor?
39
00:01:40,333 --> 00:01:42,400
No. You did.
40
00:01:45,350 --> 00:01:47,183
Oh, Elizabeth Taylor!
41
00:01:47,216 --> 00:01:48,466
Oh, when I was
a little girl,
42
00:01:49,000 --> 00:01:51,316
my mother would
dress me up like her
for Halloween.
43
00:01:51,350 --> 00:01:54,383
All that big dark hair
and dramatic makeup,
44
00:01:54,416 --> 00:01:56,300
tight little dress.
45
00:01:56,333 --> 00:01:58,830
[SIGHING]
Oh, I'll tell you,
46
00:01:58,116 --> 00:02:01,183
the things you can
get away with
when you're a kid.
47
00:02:02,316 --> 00:02:04,383
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
48
00:02:04,416 --> 00:02:07,100
SINGER:♪♪ She was working
in a bridal shop
in Flushing, Queens ♪♪
49
00:02:07,133 --> 00:02:08,366
♪♪ 'Til her boyfriend
kicked her out ♪♪
50
00:02:08,400 --> 00:02:10,333
♪♪ In one of those
crushing scenes ♪♪
51
00:02:10,366 --> 00:02:12,200
♪♪ What was she to do?
Where was she to go? ♪♪
52
00:02:12,233 --> 00:02:15,400
♪♪ She was out on her fanny ♪♪
53
00:02:15,433 --> 00:02:18,150
♪♪ So over the bridge
from Flushing
to the Sheffield's door ♪♪
54
00:02:18,183 --> 00:02:20,350
♪♪ She was there
to sell makeup,
but the father saw more ♪♪
55
00:02:20,383 --> 00:02:22,400
♪♪ She had style!
She had flair!
She was there! ♪♪
56
00:02:22,433 --> 00:02:26,233
♪♪ That's how
she became the nanny! ♪♪
57
00:02:26,266 --> 00:02:29,266
♪♪ Who would have guessed
that the girl
we've described
58
00:02:29,300 --> 00:02:31,233
♪♪ Was just exactly what
the doctor prescribed? ♪♪
59
00:02:31,266 --> 00:02:33,330
♪♪ Now the father
finds her beguiling ♪♪
60
00:02:33,660 --> 00:02:34,250
♪♪ Watch out, C.C.! ♪♪
61
00:02:34,283 --> 00:02:36,500
♪♪ And the kids
are actually smiling ♪♪
62
00:02:36,830 --> 00:02:37,233
♪♪ Such♪♪
63
00:02:37,266 --> 00:02:39,330
♪♪ She's the lady in red ♪♪
64
00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:42,283
♪♪ When everybody else
is wearing tan ♪♪
65
00:02:42,316 --> 00:02:44,450
♪♪ The flashy girl
from Flushing ♪♪
66
00:02:44,483 --> 00:02:46,316
♪♪ The nanny named Fran! ♪♪
67
00:02:49,830 --> 00:02:52,266
Oh, it's so nice
to meet you, Miss Taylor.
68
00:02:53,200 --> 00:02:54,300
[CAMERA CLICKS]
69
00:02:56,330 --> 00:02:57,660
[SIGHS]
70
00:02:57,100 --> 00:02:58,433
Perfect.
71
00:03:00,160 --> 00:03:02,166
Maxwell, Nanny Fine's
in the living room!
72
00:03:02,200 --> 00:03:03,400
[SHUSHING]
73
00:03:03,433 --> 00:03:05,133
Miss Fine!
74
00:03:05,166 --> 00:03:07,466
I'm just seeing
the kids off to school.
75
00:03:08,000 --> 00:03:09,366
They left an hour ago.
76
00:03:09,400 --> 00:03:12,416
Well, it's a clear day.
I can see forever.
77
00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:17,500
Miss Fine,
what are the rules?
78
00:03:17,830 --> 00:03:19,483
Niles, and only Niles,
is to answer the door.
79
00:03:20,160 --> 00:03:21,466
I'm to stay away
from your office,
80
00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:25,200
and I'm forbidden
to create a diversion
81
00:03:25,233 --> 00:03:29,200
such as
setting a small
but containable fire.
82
00:03:31,660 --> 00:03:34,383
And no staged emergencies
with the children either.
83
00:03:34,416 --> 00:03:36,200
Oh, come on.
84
00:03:36,233 --> 00:03:39,366
Help! I think
I broke my arm.
85
00:03:39,400 --> 00:03:43,000
Save it, honey.
We've been busted.
86
00:03:44,366 --> 00:03:46,183
[DOORBELL RINGING]
87
00:03:46,216 --> 00:03:49,500
Elizabeth Taylor.
88
00:03:50,183 --> 00:03:52,183
[THUDDING]
89
00:03:55,416 --> 00:03:57,350
[DOORBELL RINGING]
90
00:03:57,383 --> 00:03:59,483
I'll get it.
91
00:04:10,330 --> 00:04:11,400
Hello.
92
00:04:16,350 --> 00:04:19,283
Oh, Elizabeth Taylor.
93
00:04:19,316 --> 00:04:21,466
This is such an honor.
94
00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:25,116
I'm Fran.
Look at the pretty table.
95
00:04:26,400 --> 00:04:28,333
Keep looking.
96
00:04:30,500 --> 00:04:32,166
Keep looking.
97
00:04:34,116 --> 00:04:36,830
Oh, forget it.
98
00:04:40,233 --> 00:04:42,183
Miss Fine.
99
00:04:46,283 --> 00:04:48,266
[GROWLING]
100
00:04:51,160 --> 00:04:53,183
So, are you
Maxwell's wife?
101
00:04:53,216 --> 00:04:56,160
Oh, no.
I just work for him.
102
00:04:56,500 --> 00:04:58,200
Actually,
I've never been married.
103
00:04:58,233 --> 00:05:00,350
Not even once?
104
00:05:06,266 --> 00:05:08,133
Well, you know,
there was one time,
105
00:05:08,166 --> 00:05:10,830
but then
I thought about it...
106
00:05:10,116 --> 00:05:12,383
[LAUGHING]
That was your mistake, dear.
107
00:05:19,830 --> 00:05:21,166
Shouldn't you tell
Maxwell I'm here?
108
00:05:21,200 --> 00:05:23,200
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Sure. Sure.
109
00:05:23,233 --> 00:05:25,350
You know what?
I'll just buzz him.
110
00:05:25,383 --> 00:05:27,466
Just buzz him.
111
00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:29,233
Buzz, buzz.
112
00:05:31,660 --> 00:05:35,500
Oh, Miss Taylor,
I have seen everything
that you've ever done.
113
00:05:35,830 --> 00:05:37,233
Cleopatra,
Virginia Woolf.
114
00:05:37,266 --> 00:05:39,416
But you know what
my favorite was?
115
00:05:39,450 --> 00:05:41,433
Here's Lucy.
116
00:05:43,366 --> 00:05:46,266
Oh, I'll tell you,
when your ring
117
00:05:46,300 --> 00:05:49,233
got stuck
on her finger...
118
00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:52,450
You know, I bet you
a lot of people ask you this,
119
00:05:52,483 --> 00:05:55,283
-but could I just...
-No.
120
00:05:57,283 --> 00:06:01,400
Okay.
Well, I'll just go
hang up your coat.
121
00:06:09,183 --> 00:06:10,316
Ma!
122
00:06:15,283 --> 00:06:17,500
What are you
doing here?
123
00:06:17,830 --> 00:06:19,300
The boy let me in.
124
00:06:19,333 --> 00:06:21,400
I've got to meet
Elizabeth Taylor!
125
00:06:21,433 --> 00:06:23,366
Excuse me!
126
00:06:23,400 --> 00:06:25,200
FRAN: Over my dead body.
127
00:06:25,233 --> 00:06:27,150
SYLVIA:
If I could meet
Elizabeth Taylor,
128
00:06:27,183 --> 00:06:30,330
I could retire
in Florida tomorrow.
129
00:06:30,660 --> 00:06:33,330
Miss Taylor,
I'd like you
to meet my mother.
130
00:06:43,100 --> 00:06:46,233
Sylvia Fine.
131
00:06:46,266 --> 00:06:50,183
This meeting bestows
an honor upon me
132
00:06:50,216 --> 00:06:54,283
which is unparalleled
within my universe.
133
00:06:56,383 --> 00:07:00,660
Oh, Maxwell! Thank God.
134
00:07:00,100 --> 00:07:01,133
Elizabeth.
135
00:07:01,166 --> 00:07:04,416
Sylvia, Miss Fine.
You're fired.
136
00:07:06,830 --> 00:07:07,216
Elizabeth, I'm so sorry.
137
00:07:07,250 --> 00:07:09,150
I didn't know you
had already arrived.
138
00:07:09,183 --> 00:07:11,000
Oh, didn't you
hear the buzzer?
139
00:07:11,330 --> 00:07:12,216
No.
140
00:07:13,400 --> 00:07:17,200
Elizabeth,
this is my associate,
C.C. Babcock.
141
00:07:19,316 --> 00:07:21,316
[GIGGLING]
142
00:07:22,433 --> 00:07:25,366
Hello, Elizabeth Taylor.
143
00:07:27,350 --> 00:07:29,483
I bet she isn't married.
144
00:07:33,283 --> 00:07:38,300
Well, why don't we
step into my study,
have a spot of tea?
145
00:07:43,350 --> 00:07:46,233
Ah, and here it is.
146
00:07:55,160 --> 00:07:56,433
Oh, how do you do,
Tiss Maylor.
147
00:07:56,466 --> 00:07:59,660
I'm Biles the nutler.
148
00:08:02,450 --> 00:08:04,333
That's not right,
is it?
149
00:08:06,233 --> 00:08:09,416
This way, Elizabeth.
Just follow the nutler.
150
00:08:09,450 --> 00:08:12,333
I'll be right there,
Maxwell.
151
00:08:12,366 --> 00:08:15,350
Oh, Fran,
could you do me
a massive favor?
152
00:08:15,383 --> 00:08:18,100
-Yes. Yes.
-I'm wearing these
for a photo shoot
153
00:08:18,133 --> 00:08:20,383
to promote my new fragrance,
"Black Pearls."
154
00:08:20,416 --> 00:08:23,166
[BOTH SQUEAL]
155
00:08:23,200 --> 00:08:24,483
-Say, could I...
-No.
156
00:08:25,160 --> 00:08:26,433
Oh.
157
00:08:26,466 --> 00:08:29,166
Could you just call
a bonded courier
158
00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:31,166
and have these sent
to this address?
159
00:08:31,200 --> 00:08:34,330
-You're a love.
-Oh, oh, yes, my queen.
160
00:08:34,660 --> 00:08:35,383
Yes. That call
will get made.
161
00:08:35,416 --> 00:08:39,200
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
162
00:08:44,166 --> 00:08:47,233
You know, sweetheart,
I wouldn't trust a courier.
163
00:08:47,266 --> 00:08:49,133
-No?
-Those armed trucks
164
00:08:49,166 --> 00:08:51,366
just scream,
"Rob me. Rob me".
165
00:08:52,333 --> 00:08:54,160
You know,
you're right, ma.
166
00:08:54,500 --> 00:08:58,330
I can't trust no
bonded courier professional.
167
00:08:58,660 --> 00:09:01,000
I'm gonna have
to do this myself.
168
00:09:01,330 --> 00:09:04,500
Oh, I can't believe
you hid in the closet.
169
00:09:04,830 --> 00:09:07,333
To tell you the truth,
it wasn't my idea.
170
00:09:13,233 --> 00:09:15,283
Come on out, Yetta.
171
00:09:27,450 --> 00:09:30,400
Ah, excuse me.
172
00:09:32,830 --> 00:09:34,183
Excuse me!
173
00:09:34,216 --> 00:09:35,433
What?
174
00:09:47,466 --> 00:09:51,300
You know,
it isn't so much
the half-eaten McDLT
175
00:09:51,333 --> 00:09:53,483
that bothers me so much.
176
00:09:54,160 --> 00:09:57,216
It's the fact that they
discontinued them in '94.
177
00:09:58,316 --> 00:10:00,330
Oh, my God!
I didn't realize
178
00:10:00,660 --> 00:10:04,500
I had Princess Caroline
of Monaco in my back seat.
179
00:10:04,830 --> 00:10:06,183
Forgive me, Your Highness.
I didn't recognize you
180
00:10:06,216 --> 00:10:09,500
with your new
Priscilla Presley hairdo.
181
00:10:12,283 --> 00:10:14,483
Listen, uh... Cozette?
182
00:10:15,160 --> 00:10:17,233
Yeah. I'm French.
183
00:10:19,500 --> 00:10:23,383
You know,
there are occupations
that don't depend on tips.
184
00:10:25,830 --> 00:10:27,500
What is that
supposed to mean?
185
00:10:27,830 --> 00:10:29,166
Well, it's just
that you're...
186
00:10:29,200 --> 00:10:32,233
You're a very
unpleasant person,
as people go.
187
00:10:34,116 --> 00:10:36,316
Well, thank you
very much.
188
00:10:36,350 --> 00:10:39,166
If you were trying
to hurt my feelings
189
00:10:41,830 --> 00:10:44,383
you have succeeded.
Okay?
190
00:10:44,416 --> 00:10:48,433
I mean, I have been having
a really hard week,
191
00:10:48,466 --> 00:10:51,233
a lot of stress,
a lot of pain.
192
00:10:51,266 --> 00:10:56,000
Oh, honey, I'm sorry.
I... I had no idea.
193
00:10:56,330 --> 00:10:58,330
What's his name?
What did he do?
194
00:10:58,660 --> 00:10:59,466
Jean-Claude.
195
00:11:01,166 --> 00:11:02,416
It's my birthday,
right?
196
00:11:02,450 --> 00:11:05,830
-Happy birthday.
-Oh, thank you.
197
00:11:05,116 --> 00:11:06,216
Do I get perfume?
198
00:11:06,250 --> 00:11:07,350
-No.
-No.
199
00:11:07,383 --> 00:11:08,383
Do I get flowers?
200
00:11:08,416 --> 00:11:10,500
-No.
-No.
201
00:11:10,830 --> 00:11:13,830
You know,
I'm a woman.
I'm sensitive.
202
00:11:13,116 --> 00:11:15,500
I have needs.
203
00:11:15,830 --> 00:11:18,216
Hey, does it say
"Wheelchair Crossing"?
204
00:11:27,416 --> 00:11:31,150
Honey, you know,
let me give you just
a little piece of advice.
205
00:11:31,183 --> 00:11:34,830
I was just talking
to my girlfriend,
206
00:11:34,116 --> 00:11:37,116
Elizabeth Taylor.
207
00:11:37,150 --> 00:11:40,366
Elizabeth Taylor Hilton
Wilding Todd Fisher
208
00:11:40,400 --> 00:11:45,216
BOTH:
Burton Burton
Warner Fortenski?
209
00:11:49,350 --> 00:11:53,500
No wonder her hips
keep breaking down.
210
00:11:57,160 --> 00:12:00,166
That's a good one.
One for you.
211
00:12:00,200 --> 00:12:03,250
Oh, honey,
your mascara's running
just a little bit over there.
212
00:12:03,283 --> 00:12:05,830
-Oh, thank you.
Thank you.
-Yeah.
213
00:12:05,116 --> 00:12:07,330
So, let me just
show you something.
214
00:12:07,660 --> 00:12:09,150
You're gonna get
a big kick out of this.
215
00:12:09,183 --> 00:12:11,000
Red light, sweetie.
216
00:12:11,330 --> 00:12:13,160
Have you ever
seen anything...
217
00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:14,383
Red light, honey.
218
00:12:14,416 --> 00:12:17,500
Take one look at--
red light!
219
00:12:17,830 --> 00:12:19,216
[HORN BLARING]
220
00:12:34,333 --> 00:12:37,133
What could be taking
that doctor so long?
221
00:12:37,166 --> 00:12:39,300
Well, she couldn't have
hit her head that badly.
222
00:12:39,333 --> 00:12:43,500
Her hair alone should act
like a built-in air bag.
223
00:12:44,266 --> 00:12:48,150
I can't believe my daughter
is lying in a hospital.
224
00:12:51,133 --> 00:12:54,166
Mmm. This isn't bad.
225
00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:57,483
I don't know why
everyone complains
about the food.
226
00:13:02,100 --> 00:13:04,150
Don't worry.
She's gonna be just fine.
227
00:13:04,183 --> 00:13:07,160
But I have to warn you,
she's not quite all there.
228
00:13:07,500 --> 00:13:10,416
Oh, no, no.
That's normal.
229
00:13:10,450 --> 00:13:15,660
She bruised her brain
and is experiencing
some loss of memory.
230
00:13:15,100 --> 00:13:16,166
Memory loss?
231
00:13:16,200 --> 00:13:19,383
Don't worry.
It'll come back.
232
00:13:19,416 --> 00:13:23,100
The same thing
happened to me once.
233
00:13:23,133 --> 00:13:25,160
When?
234
00:13:25,500 --> 00:13:27,160
When what?
235
00:13:29,316 --> 00:13:31,483
Her memory will
return on its own.
236
00:13:32,160 --> 00:13:35,116
Just don't force it.
You can see her now.
237
00:13:39,200 --> 00:13:41,116
Maxwell,
thank goodness.
238
00:13:41,150 --> 00:13:44,283
Elizabeth Taylor's
black pearls are missing,
239
00:13:44,316 --> 00:13:46,500
and the last person
who had them...
240
00:13:46,830 --> 00:13:47,333
C.C., not now.
241
00:13:47,366 --> 00:13:51,100
Miss Fine is lying
in a hospital bed
with amnesia.
242
00:13:51,133 --> 00:13:53,133
I'll kill her!
243
00:13:53,166 --> 00:13:55,200
Hi.
244
00:13:55,233 --> 00:13:56,350
I'm Gracie.
245
00:13:56,383 --> 00:13:57,383
I'm Brighton.
246
00:13:57,416 --> 00:13:59,250
I'm Maggie.
247
00:13:59,283 --> 00:14:00,416
Wait a minute.
248
00:14:00,450 --> 00:14:04,830
You know, this seems
familiar to me.
249
00:14:04,116 --> 00:14:07,100
Say, did I ever sing
on some Austrian hillside
250
00:14:07,133 --> 00:14:09,350
with a really
butch haircut?
251
00:14:13,150 --> 00:14:17,000
Everybody out.
Out.
252
00:14:17,330 --> 00:14:21,483
I have to speak to
the brain-bruised
woman in the bed.
253
00:14:22,160 --> 00:14:24,166
She does need
her rest now.
254
00:14:24,200 --> 00:14:26,450
Your family can
come back later
and take you home.
255
00:14:26,483 --> 00:14:28,266
Oh, thank you.
256
00:14:29,466 --> 00:14:32,830
So how are you?
How are you feeling?
257
00:14:32,116 --> 00:14:34,250
Well, you know,
I feel pretty good,
258
00:14:34,283 --> 00:14:36,283
but I think that
this bump on the head
259
00:14:36,316 --> 00:14:40,133
really screwed with
my nasal passages.
260
00:14:40,166 --> 00:14:44,233
I mean, can you imagine
going through life like this?
261
00:14:48,830 --> 00:14:50,250
Please, please, does...
262
00:14:50,283 --> 00:14:54,416
does the name
Elizabeth Taylor
ring any bells?
263
00:14:54,450 --> 00:14:56,266
Yes, yes, of course.
264
00:14:56,300 --> 00:14:59,316
-Of course. I remember.
-Oh, yes. Yes.
265
00:14:59,350 --> 00:15:02,166
I'm Elizabeth Taylor.
266
00:15:03,200 --> 00:15:07,283
No! You're not
Elizabeth Taylor!
267
00:15:07,316 --> 00:15:08,366
Bummer.
268
00:15:13,150 --> 00:15:15,233
She doesn't remember.
269
00:15:18,216 --> 00:15:20,133
Who are you?
270
00:15:20,166 --> 00:15:22,366
I'm your grandma.
271
00:15:24,660 --> 00:15:25,416
Boy, I'm lucky.
272
00:15:25,450 --> 00:15:29,350
I think everything
worked out just the way
I always thought it would.
273
00:15:29,383 --> 00:15:32,116
I'm married to
a great-looking guy
274
00:15:32,150 --> 00:15:34,283
and I have three
gorgeous children.
275
00:15:34,316 --> 00:15:38,166
Oh, honey,
you got hit
on the head.
276
00:15:38,200 --> 00:15:40,316
You're a little
confused.
277
00:15:40,350 --> 00:15:44,416
The two big ones
are from a previous
marriage.
278
00:15:54,183 --> 00:15:57,383
Niles,
what could she have done
with those bloody pearls?
279
00:15:57,416 --> 00:16:01,000
Is there any sign
of Miss Fine's
memory returning?
280
00:16:01,330 --> 00:16:03,500
Well, she couldn't
find her room,
281
00:16:03,830 --> 00:16:05,000
but she was able
to recall the numbers
282
00:16:05,330 --> 00:16:07,250
on your American
Express Gold Card.
283
00:16:12,660 --> 00:16:14,133
And your mother's
maiden name.
284
00:16:15,483 --> 00:16:18,316
Oh, here, try to relax,
sir. There.
285
00:16:18,350 --> 00:16:21,250
I'll have your brandy
and cigar.
286
00:16:21,283 --> 00:16:23,233
Waiting for me
when I get out?
287
00:16:23,266 --> 00:16:25,416
Um... yeah.
288
00:16:57,450 --> 00:17:00,150
Hi, hubby.
289
00:17:03,333 --> 00:17:06,100
Oh, dear God in heaven!
290
00:17:06,133 --> 00:17:10,160
Oh, sweetie,
I don't remember much
about our married life,
291
00:17:10,500 --> 00:17:12,383
but I figure there's
got to be a reason
292
00:17:12,416 --> 00:17:15,416
why this tub is
big enough for two.
293
00:17:19,233 --> 00:17:22,366
Oh, gee, I wish that
would clear up.
294
00:17:22,400 --> 00:17:25,400
Ah, yes, of course,
our, um...
295
00:17:25,433 --> 00:17:28,000
our married life.
Uh...
296
00:17:28,330 --> 00:17:29,300
I... I know
I'm not supposed
297
00:17:29,333 --> 00:17:33,400
to jar your memory
or anything, but, uh...
298
00:17:33,433 --> 00:17:36,433
But what?
299
00:17:38,660 --> 00:17:40,366
Happy 10th anniversary,
darling.
300
00:17:43,166 --> 00:17:46,200
No, no, no, no, no, no!
I can't do this.
301
00:17:46,233 --> 00:17:50,660
Look, I'm not your husband.
302
00:17:50,100 --> 00:17:53,183
Oh, my God!
We're not married?
303
00:17:55,233 --> 00:17:57,200
The truth is I hired you.
304
00:17:57,233 --> 00:17:59,350
I'm a hooker?
305
00:18:03,233 --> 00:18:05,300
Well, that explains my shoes.
306
00:18:07,150 --> 00:18:09,266
No, no. You're...
you're my nanny.
307
00:18:09,300 --> 00:18:12,200
You take care
of my children.
308
00:18:12,233 --> 00:18:16,000
But I've got style.
I've got flair.
309
00:18:16,330 --> 00:18:18,266
How could I become
the nanny?
310
00:18:20,483 --> 00:18:23,300
Oh, everything's
upside down.
311
00:18:23,333 --> 00:18:27,000
Wait a minute. You're still on
Remington Steele,
312
00:18:29,466 --> 00:18:32,200
I am not Pierce Brosnan.
313
00:18:34,416 --> 00:18:39,160
I am Maxwell Sheffield,
and you are my nanny,
Fran Fine.
314
00:18:39,500 --> 00:18:43,000
Now, would you
please get out
of my bath?
315
00:18:43,330 --> 00:18:46,500
Oh, nice try, mister.
316
00:18:46,830 --> 00:18:48,383
You get out first.
317
00:18:48,416 --> 00:18:51,133
Don't splash me!
318
00:18:51,166 --> 00:18:52,333
Don't. Stop it!
Stop it!
319
00:18:52,366 --> 00:18:55,133
Oh! Don't! Stop it!
Don't! Don't!
320
00:18:55,166 --> 00:18:56,300
Oh! Oh! Oh!
321
00:18:56,333 --> 00:18:58,316
[BOTH SHOUTING]
322
00:19:04,116 --> 00:19:07,166
NILES: Excuse me, sir,
Miss Babcock's on
the phone for you,
323
00:19:07,200 --> 00:19:11,283
but I'll just tell her
you'll call right back
324
00:19:11,316 --> 00:19:14,483
right after you and Miss Fine
get out of the Jacuzzi.
325
00:19:22,333 --> 00:19:23,316
Morning, sir.
326
00:19:23,350 --> 00:19:25,500
Morning, Niles.
327
00:19:25,830 --> 00:19:27,350
There seems
to be a problem
with the phones.
328
00:19:27,383 --> 00:19:30,216
I unplugged them, Niles.
329
00:19:30,250 --> 00:19:33,150
What if Miss Taylor
should call looking
for her pearls?
330
00:19:33,183 --> 00:19:37,450
Ah, what if the person
who finds them tries to call?
331
00:19:40,450 --> 00:19:42,400
Plug them back in, Niles.
332
00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:46,283
Got any more
bright ideas?
333
00:19:50,500 --> 00:19:51,466
Good morning.
334
00:19:52,000 --> 00:19:54,200
Can I ask you
a question?
335
00:19:54,233 --> 00:19:57,216
I have been
dressing like this
for three years,
336
00:19:57,250 --> 00:19:59,466
and there's nothing
going on between us?
337
00:20:03,283 --> 00:20:05,450
That's right.
I'm your employer.
338
00:20:05,483 --> 00:20:06,483
Mmm.
339
00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:09,330
And what is it
you do again?
340
00:20:09,660 --> 00:20:11,200
I produce
musical theater.
341
00:20:11,233 --> 00:20:13,483
Oh, now it's all
making sense to me.
342
00:20:18,150 --> 00:20:21,216
Oh, and you, mister,
don't you go anywhere.
343
00:20:21,250 --> 00:20:23,250
After breakfast,
you're cleaning
up the dishes.
344
00:20:23,283 --> 00:20:27,150
It's part of your punishment
for cutting fourth period
last Thursday.
345
00:20:27,183 --> 00:20:29,160
That she remembers?
346
00:20:33,483 --> 00:20:36,200
Do you recognize
this man?
347
00:20:36,233 --> 00:20:39,183
No. No.
348
00:20:39,216 --> 00:20:42,416
No. No. No.
349
00:20:42,450 --> 00:20:44,300
Who are all those men?
350
00:20:44,333 --> 00:20:46,350
They're your father,
351
00:20:48,150 --> 00:20:50,383
just wearing different hair.
352
00:20:53,433 --> 00:20:57,160
I just can't take this
any more. I got to go.
353
00:20:57,500 --> 00:21:00,150
I'm late for your
cousin Rose's wedding.
354
00:21:00,183 --> 00:21:01,366
What?
355
00:21:01,400 --> 00:21:05,383
Rose the nose
is getting married
before me?
356
00:21:08,116 --> 00:21:09,266
Fran?
357
00:21:10,333 --> 00:21:12,300
Ma?
358
00:21:13,300 --> 00:21:16,166
♪♪ How much is that dress ♪♪
359
00:21:16,200 --> 00:21:19,266
♪♪ In Macy's window? ♪♪
360
00:21:21,160 --> 00:21:22,383
♪♪ Who cares ♪♪
361
00:21:22,416 --> 00:21:27,166
♪♪ It'll be at
Loehmann's
on sale ♪♪
362
00:21:28,466 --> 00:21:31,660
Fran, you're back.
363
00:21:31,100 --> 00:21:32,416
Oh, ma.
364
00:21:35,316 --> 00:21:38,383
Oh, ma,
I don't believe it.
365
00:21:38,416 --> 00:21:40,450
It's all coming
back to me now.
366
00:21:40,483 --> 00:21:43,466
I was driving along,
and I hit my head,
367
00:21:44,000 --> 00:21:47,116
and I left
Elizabeth Taylor's
pearls in the taxi.
368
00:21:47,150 --> 00:21:48,366
And I'm getting
out of here.
369
00:21:49,416 --> 00:21:52,266
You lost
Elizabeth Taylor's pearls?
370
00:21:52,300 --> 00:21:55,660
Well, you're the one that
told me not to use a courier.
371
00:21:55,100 --> 00:21:56,466
Oh, Miss Fine.
372
00:21:58,660 --> 00:21:59,250
Who are you?
373
00:22:00,333 --> 00:22:03,400
Oh, don't you remember me?
374
00:22:03,433 --> 00:22:07,183
Ah, well, you look
awfully familiar, but...
375
00:22:07,216 --> 00:22:10,183
oh, gee, I've met so
many people this week.
376
00:22:10,216 --> 00:22:12,160
Oh, come on, think.
377
00:22:12,500 --> 00:22:15,300
Oh, I know.
You're that nice,
loving, and forgiving man.
378
00:22:15,333 --> 00:22:17,200
Guess again.
379
00:22:17,233 --> 00:22:18,283
[GRUNTING]
380
00:22:18,316 --> 00:22:19,316
You're my employer?
381
00:22:19,350 --> 00:22:21,466
[CHUCKLING]
Guess again.
382
00:22:23,300 --> 00:22:25,166
You're my worst
nightmare?
383
00:22:25,200 --> 00:22:26,366
You've got it!
384
00:22:26,400 --> 00:22:29,160
[SCREAMING]
385
00:22:41,416 --> 00:22:44,350
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]