1 00:00:02,266 --> 00:00:06,266 I cannot believe my mother is having an affair. 2 00:00:06,300 --> 00:00:08,150 I'm having palpitations. 3 00:00:08,183 --> 00:00:11,830 I'm having palpitations. 4 00:00:11,116 --> 00:00:12,416 Darling, seeing a doctor 5 00:00:12,450 --> 00:00:15,433 does not necessarily mean they're being intimate. 6 00:00:15,466 --> 00:00:19,433 Oh, please, when I see a man, you don't think I'm intimate with him? 7 00:00:19,466 --> 00:00:21,233 Not if he sees you. 8 00:00:24,400 --> 00:00:28,500 You know, sweetheart, I went through the same thing with my parents. 9 00:00:28,830 --> 00:00:30,160 It's totally beyond your control. 10 00:00:30,500 --> 00:00:32,316 Why aren't you as shocked as me? 11 00:00:32,350 --> 00:00:35,300 Well, I'm, you know, European. 12 00:00:37,266 --> 00:00:42,116 Things are a little more accepted there. It's looser. It's freer. 13 00:00:42,150 --> 00:00:44,233 It's, uh, so wrong. 14 00:00:46,333 --> 00:00:48,283 Well, my mother is not European. 15 00:00:48,316 --> 00:00:50,416 She's a middle-aged Jewish yenta 16 00:00:50,450 --> 00:00:53,333 that should be going to see a doctor for intestinal problems. 17 00:00:53,366 --> 00:00:55,333 That I can believe. 18 00:00:55,366 --> 00:00:58,483 I just heard about the affair. 19 00:00:59,160 --> 00:01:04,150 Oh, don't worry, Franny, your father's a very good man. 20 00:01:04,183 --> 00:01:08,333 Sylvia wouldn't throw that away for some fling. 21 00:01:08,366 --> 00:01:11,300 Exactly. Yetta's absolutely right. 22 00:01:11,333 --> 00:01:14,483 I'm sure this thing with your mother and her doctor won't last. 23 00:01:15,160 --> 00:01:17,100 My daughter's dating a doctor? 24 00:01:18,830 --> 00:01:19,660 Whoo-hoo. 25 00:01:27,116 --> 00:01:28,483 ♪ She was working In a bridal shop ♪ 26 00:01:29,160 --> 00:01:30,183 ♪ In Flushing, Queens ♪ 27 00:01:30,216 --> 00:01:31,350 ♪ Till her boyfriend Kicked her out ♪ 28 00:01:31,383 --> 00:01:33,330 ♪ In one of those Crushing scenes ♪ 29 00:01:33,660 --> 00:01:35,000 ♪ What was she to do? Where was she to go? ♪ 30 00:01:35,330 --> 00:01:37,350 ♪ She was out on her fanny ♪ 31 00:01:37,383 --> 00:01:39,166 ♪ So over the bridge From Flushing ♪ 32 00:01:39,200 --> 00:01:40,383 ♪ To the Sheffield's door ♪ 33 00:01:40,416 --> 00:01:43,216 ♪ She was there to sell make-up But the father saw more ♪ 34 00:01:43,250 --> 00:01:45,116 ♪ She had style! She had flair! She was there ♪ 35 00:01:45,150 --> 00:01:46,166 ♪ That's how she became ♪ 36 00:01:46,200 --> 00:01:49,330 ♪ The Nanny ♪ 37 00:01:49,660 --> 00:01:52,000 ♪ Who would have guessed That the girl we described ♪ 38 00:01:52,330 --> 00:01:54,200 ♪ Was just exactly What the doctor prescribed? ♪ 39 00:01:54,233 --> 00:01:55,350 ♪ Now, the father Finds her beguiling ♪ 40 00:01:55,383 --> 00:01:56,483 ♪ Watch out C.C. ♪ 41 00:01:57,160 --> 00:01:58,366 ♪ And the kids Are actually smiling ♪ 42 00:01:58,400 --> 00:01:59,383 ♪ Such joie de vivre ♪ 43 00:01:59,416 --> 00:02:01,830 ♪ She's the lady in red ♪ 44 00:02:01,116 --> 00:02:04,660 ♪ When everybody else Is wearing tan ♪ 45 00:02:05,233 --> 00:02:07,500 ♪ The flashy girl From Flushing ♪ 46 00:02:07,830 --> 00:02:08,350 ♪ The Nanny named Fran! ♪ 47 00:02:15,166 --> 00:02:16,383 Oh, doctor... 48 00:02:18,383 --> 00:02:22,200 I am so flattered, but I have to tell you the truth. 49 00:02:22,233 --> 00:02:24,266 I am wearing a little makeup. 50 00:02:26,466 --> 00:02:28,160 No. 51 00:02:29,416 --> 00:02:32,133 You've changed your hair, haven't you? 52 00:02:32,166 --> 00:02:34,100 Did it get lighter from the sun? 53 00:02:34,133 --> 00:02:35,366 Yeah, the sun. 54 00:02:37,116 --> 00:02:40,366 You know, I notice every little thing about you. 55 00:02:41,316 --> 00:02:43,316 Including how much you love... 56 00:02:44,200 --> 00:02:46,183 Oh, my God! 57 00:02:46,216 --> 00:02:47,316 Samples! 58 00:02:50,383 --> 00:02:52,433 Cotton swabs! 59 00:02:52,466 --> 00:02:54,216 Oh, Handi Wipes. 60 00:02:55,316 --> 00:02:58,166 Antibacterial ointment. 61 00:02:59,233 --> 00:03:02,233 Oh, you are so extravagant. 62 00:03:04,500 --> 00:03:07,100 You know, my daughter is giving me the third degree about you. 63 00:03:08,830 --> 00:03:11,660 Hmm. She can't wait to meet you. 64 00:03:12,200 --> 00:03:14,316 Are your kids doing the same about me? 65 00:03:14,350 --> 00:03:18,160 Oh, no. My daughters respect my privacy. 66 00:03:18,500 --> 00:03:22,830 They know that when I'm ready I'll introduce you. 67 00:03:22,116 --> 00:03:26,330 They would never intrude in my private life. 68 00:03:27,250 --> 00:03:28,400 So, Miss Blodgett, 69 00:03:32,300 --> 00:03:34,150 what are your symptoms? 70 00:03:34,183 --> 00:03:36,133 Well, I'm sick and I'm nauseous. 71 00:03:36,166 --> 00:03:39,350 I think I had some bad Italian at an affair. 72 00:03:42,133 --> 00:03:43,183 Uh-huh. 73 00:03:45,160 --> 00:03:48,483 -Well, let's try your reflexes first. -Okay. 74 00:03:52,330 --> 00:03:55,150 Sorry. You know how weird those nerve connections can be. 75 00:03:56,333 --> 00:03:57,316 Um... 76 00:03:58,283 --> 00:04:00,266 I'm gonna look in your ear. 77 00:04:00,300 --> 00:04:02,160 Do I need to put on a cup? 78 00:04:03,150 --> 00:04:04,283 [chuckles] 79 00:04:06,150 --> 00:04:09,333 -Is that your family over there? -Yeah. 80 00:04:09,366 --> 00:04:12,466 -You have a lovely wife. -I did. 81 00:04:13,000 --> 00:04:14,166 I lost her nine years ago. 82 00:04:15,200 --> 00:04:18,150 Oh, I'm so sorry. 83 00:04:18,183 --> 00:04:21,500 Wow, did I say nine years? 84 00:04:21,830 --> 00:04:22,450 I can't believe it's been that long. 85 00:04:25,166 --> 00:04:27,300 This picture we took on our last anniversary. 86 00:04:27,333 --> 00:04:29,116 We went to Hawaii. 87 00:04:29,150 --> 00:04:32,250 Oh, yeah, it was so dark and you were so tan. 88 00:04:32,283 --> 00:04:33,383 That's Don Ho. 89 00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:42,660 Your wife was very beautiful. 90 00:04:42,100 --> 00:04:44,330 -She was, wasn't she? -Yeah. 91 00:04:45,160 --> 00:04:46,266 You know what you miss the most? 92 00:04:46,300 --> 00:04:48,100 The little things. 93 00:04:48,133 --> 00:04:50,660 Her perfume, her laugh. 94 00:04:51,333 --> 00:04:54,433 The look on her face whenever I would surprise her... 95 00:04:54,466 --> 00:04:57,383 with tickets for a Sunday matinee. 96 00:04:57,416 --> 00:05:00,400 You mean, you didn't spend your Sundays sitting in front of the TV 97 00:05:00,433 --> 00:05:03,100 spitting out peanut shells watching the football game? 98 00:05:04,200 --> 00:05:06,500 My wife hated sports. 99 00:05:06,830 --> 00:05:07,166 So I gave them up. 100 00:05:11,383 --> 00:05:14,266 If you didn't wanna direct my school play, why did you say yes? 101 00:05:14,300 --> 00:05:16,266 Because you asked me before they were married and pregnant, 102 00:05:16,300 --> 00:05:18,216 and I thought I still had a shot with your daddy. 103 00:05:19,383 --> 00:05:22,400 Maxwell, will you tell her the director is god? 104 00:05:22,433 --> 00:05:25,100 She's rehearsing us until two in the morning. 105 00:05:25,133 --> 00:05:27,333 It's because you stink. 106 00:05:27,366 --> 00:05:30,483 C.C., what do you expect when you choose Antony and Cleopatra 107 00:05:31,160 --> 00:05:32,200 for a grammar school? 108 00:05:32,233 --> 00:05:34,350 How hard is it to play a pushy broad 109 00:05:34,383 --> 00:05:36,450 who runs around half naked with too much makeup? 110 00:05:36,483 --> 00:05:39,133 Have you learned nothing from your mother? 111 00:05:40,166 --> 00:05:42,116 [phone rings] 112 00:05:42,150 --> 00:05:44,283 You're all off script tomorrow, or you're out. 113 00:05:44,316 --> 00:05:45,316 Talk. 114 00:05:46,266 --> 00:05:50,500 -Help me. -Oh, sweetheart. 115 00:05:50,830 --> 00:05:52,183 You open Saturday and you're still not off script? 116 00:05:53,266 --> 00:05:55,000 All right. 117 00:05:55,330 --> 00:05:56,450 Well, this is just great. 118 00:05:56,483 --> 00:06:00,300 The kid playing the messenger is grounded for cheating. 119 00:06:00,333 --> 00:06:05,233 All I did was slip him a few answers so he could get to rehearsal on time. 120 00:06:05,266 --> 00:06:07,433 C.C., can't you just cast some other kid in the part? 121 00:06:07,466 --> 00:06:09,216 Who? He was perfect. 122 00:06:09,250 --> 00:06:13,100 He looked like a weak, tired old man beaten down by life. 123 00:06:13,133 --> 00:06:15,200 Who am I gonna find to play a part like that? 124 00:06:23,266 --> 00:06:24,266 What? 125 00:06:26,216 --> 00:06:29,300 Maxwell, wouldn't Niles be perfect 126 00:06:29,333 --> 00:06:31,300 for that part in our sitcom in L.A.? 127 00:06:32,233 --> 00:06:35,400 Me? What part? 128 00:06:35,433 --> 00:06:39,350 Oh, if only there were a way I could see him on stage first. 129 00:06:39,383 --> 00:06:41,483 Me? What part? 130 00:06:44,266 --> 00:06:46,333 C.C., I don't think this is a very good idea. 131 00:06:46,366 --> 00:06:48,466 Oh, you're always trying to hold me back. 132 00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:51,266 You're just terrified that people are gonna find out 133 00:06:51,300 --> 00:06:53,383 that someone in this house has more talent than you. 134 00:06:57,233 --> 00:06:59,133 You know what? Break a leg. 135 00:07:03,450 --> 00:07:08,330 Oh, honey, we are in so much trouble. 136 00:07:08,660 --> 00:07:09,483 This guy that Ma is seeing, 137 00:07:10,160 --> 00:07:13,166 he's handsome, he's romantic, he's a doctor. 138 00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:14,483 He could park wherever he wants. 139 00:07:17,330 --> 00:07:20,150 Daddy would have an affair with him. 140 00:07:20,183 --> 00:07:23,416 Sweetheart, are you sure your mother isn't just going through a phase? 141 00:07:23,450 --> 00:07:27,216 I would like a word in private with Miss Blodgett, please. 142 00:07:29,350 --> 00:07:32,266 How dare you interfere with my affairs? 143 00:07:32,300 --> 00:07:35,150 Affairs? How many you having, Ma? 144 00:07:36,300 --> 00:07:38,216 Why are you doing this to me? 145 00:07:38,250 --> 00:07:41,500 I have never interfered in your personal life. 146 00:07:41,830 --> 00:07:43,133 Oh, please! 147 00:07:43,166 --> 00:07:46,183 Let there be a witness. No one will believe this. 148 00:07:46,216 --> 00:07:49,660 Ma, how could you do this to Daddy? 149 00:07:49,100 --> 00:07:51,300 Don't you realize how much he loves you? 150 00:07:51,333 --> 00:07:56,283 Darling, the only time your father looks at me with desire in his eyes 151 00:07:56,316 --> 00:07:58,250 is when I'm holding a chicken. 152 00:08:01,500 --> 00:08:03,100 You know what he gave me for my birthday? 153 00:08:03,133 --> 00:08:06,116 A standing rotisserie that drips the fat off. 154 00:08:07,100 --> 00:08:08,416 Is that stupid or what? 155 00:08:09,450 --> 00:08:11,500 I thought you'd like it. 156 00:08:13,150 --> 00:08:16,000 Fran, your father doesn't talk to me anymore. 157 00:08:16,330 --> 00:08:18,133 If at least he fought with me, that's life. 158 00:08:18,166 --> 00:08:21,000 But indifference, I can't live with that. 159 00:08:21,330 --> 00:08:24,500 But, Ma, if you and Daddy have problems, 160 00:08:24,830 --> 00:08:26,366 why don't you go see a professional? 161 00:08:26,400 --> 00:08:27,483 I am. 162 00:08:29,316 --> 00:08:32,133 Fran, you're my daughter and I love you, 163 00:08:32,166 --> 00:08:35,400 but you have no idea what I'm going through. 164 00:08:35,433 --> 00:08:39,450 Ma, I'm sorry, but I cannot and I will not accept this. 165 00:08:39,483 --> 00:08:43,366 Then you and I no longer have anything left to say to each other. 166 00:08:45,150 --> 00:08:48,350 Oh, yes, there is. 167 00:08:48,383 --> 00:08:52,150 That fatless rotisserie was a great gift! 168 00:08:54,283 --> 00:08:58,166 -Well, what happened? -I just broke up with my mother. 169 00:09:03,250 --> 00:09:06,330 You know, I'm very impressed with how you're handling 170 00:09:06,660 --> 00:09:08,233 the fact that your mother decided to show up. 171 00:09:08,266 --> 00:09:12,000 Well, honey, I'm a big enough person to set my differences aside. 172 00:09:12,330 --> 00:09:14,166 Today's day is all about Gracie. 173 00:09:15,366 --> 00:09:17,830 [fanfare playing] 174 00:09:19,250 --> 00:09:23,660 Tell me, messenger, what news bring you from Caesar? 175 00:09:33,100 --> 00:09:38,466 Tell her that she is not going out for Chinese with us after. 176 00:09:39,000 --> 00:09:43,660 Tell her that I would be happy to get it to go. 177 00:09:43,100 --> 00:09:45,400 Would you two be quiet? My son is in this play, too. 178 00:09:45,433 --> 00:09:48,160 Big deal. What is he playing? The camel? 179 00:09:49,830 --> 00:09:51,200 And don't you yell at my daughter. 180 00:09:51,233 --> 00:09:53,400 She's pregnant with my new grandchildren. 181 00:09:53,433 --> 00:09:54,400 Yeah. 182 00:09:55,333 --> 00:09:56,383 Yeah. 183 00:09:59,200 --> 00:10:03,100 Tell her that when her morning sickness kicks in 184 00:10:03,133 --> 00:10:05,416 a little warm seltzer would help. 185 00:10:05,450 --> 00:10:07,483 -Oh, my mother always said... -Tell her! 186 00:10:10,116 --> 00:10:12,116 Warm seltzer helps. 187 00:10:13,830 --> 00:10:15,100 Tell her thank you. 188 00:10:16,316 --> 00:10:21,383 I ask you, messenger, what news bring you from Caesar? 189 00:10:31,160 --> 00:10:33,116 That big kid stinks. 190 00:10:41,330 --> 00:10:45,266 Oh, there's my adorable husband. 191 00:10:45,300 --> 00:10:49,433 You know, honey, I am so glad that you set up your office here at the house. 192 00:10:49,466 --> 00:10:54,233 [Maxwell]Well, she made up with her mother, so now she's gonna nudge the father. 193 00:10:54,266 --> 00:10:58,150 So if I don't get out of here soon, she's gonna ask me to do something. 194 00:10:58,183 --> 00:11:00,350 Ooh, I'll make up a meeting. 195 00:11:00,383 --> 00:11:03,200 ...a wonderful husband you are. So, what do you say? 196 00:11:03,233 --> 00:11:05,500 Will you stick around and help me out with Daddy? 197 00:11:05,830 --> 00:11:08,316 Oh, sweetheart, I'm so sorry. I'm afraid I have a meeting. 198 00:11:08,350 --> 00:11:12,150 Oh, uh, you know, they called and canceled that meeting. 199 00:11:18,200 --> 00:11:22,450 Oh. Oh, well, in that case, I'm free as a bird. 200 00:11:22,483 --> 00:11:25,116 She canceled my fake meeting. 201 00:11:29,166 --> 00:11:32,500 I'll get it. I'll get it. 202 00:11:35,150 --> 00:11:38,166 -Hi, Daddy. -Hello, sweetheart. 203 00:11:44,450 --> 00:11:46,133 What's in the bag? 204 00:11:46,166 --> 00:11:48,000 Hey, I'm no idiot. 205 00:11:48,330 --> 00:11:50,233 There's a lot of thieves out there that want these. 206 00:11:52,330 --> 00:11:54,366 Daddy, they don't even want the car. 207 00:11:54,400 --> 00:11:56,133 Come, sit down. 208 00:11:56,166 --> 00:11:58,200 -Hey, you're looking pretty good, kiddo. -Thank you. 209 00:11:58,233 --> 00:12:00,466 So, what's up? You invite Daddy to brunch, 210 00:12:01,000 --> 00:12:02,150 you got something on your mind, huh? 211 00:12:02,183 --> 00:12:03,433 Something bothering you? I can always tell. 212 00:12:03,466 --> 00:12:05,350 Come on, sit on Daddy's lap, and tell me all about it. 213 00:12:05,383 --> 00:12:09,500 -Come on. Tell me all about it. -Daddy. Daddy, Dad, I'm pregnant. 214 00:12:09,830 --> 00:12:10,266 Daddy, Daddy. 215 00:12:11,200 --> 00:12:12,466 Well, you know, this weekend 216 00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:15,466 is yours and Mommy's 40th wedding anniversary. 217 00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:17,450 -Yeah. -And I was just thinking 218 00:12:17,483 --> 00:12:22,150 maybe the four of us could go out for dinner and dancing at the Skylight Room. 219 00:12:22,183 --> 00:12:25,500 What would I do there? I wouldn't know what to do in a place like that. 220 00:12:25,830 --> 00:12:26,160 I don't fit in there. 221 00:12:26,500 --> 00:12:27,383 Sure you do, Daddy. 222 00:12:27,416 --> 00:12:30,183 You're eating the paper off the muffin. 223 00:12:35,233 --> 00:12:36,316 Plus... 224 00:12:38,000 --> 00:12:40,266 you would make Mommy very happy 225 00:12:40,300 --> 00:12:43,330 and you wouldn't even have to buy her a gift 226 00:12:43,660 --> 00:12:45,316 because you can give her like a real fantasy night. 227 00:12:45,350 --> 00:12:49,150 Hey, hey, hey, wait a minute. We don't get into that kinky stuff. 228 00:12:51,466 --> 00:12:54,233 One time we ate cheesecake off each other in bed. 229 00:12:54,266 --> 00:12:56,450 But, that's only because nobody wanted to get up for a napkin. 230 00:13:04,233 --> 00:13:08,100 I'm talking about being debonair, romantic. 231 00:13:08,133 --> 00:13:11,133 Send her flowers. Fawn over her. 232 00:13:11,166 --> 00:13:13,316 Are you crazy? If I sent your mother flowers for no reason, 233 00:13:13,350 --> 00:13:14,483 she'd think I'm fooling around. 234 00:13:16,416 --> 00:13:20,233 Daddy, take the risk. 235 00:13:20,266 --> 00:13:24,830 I think Mommy's feeling just a little bit underappreciated. 236 00:13:24,116 --> 00:13:27,660 Oh, you're talking crazy talk. Your mother's a very happy woman. 237 00:13:27,100 --> 00:13:28,316 She's not, Dad. 238 00:13:28,350 --> 00:13:31,266 Bringing home a case of Heinz vegetarian beans 239 00:13:31,300 --> 00:13:33,660 does not a happy woman make. 240 00:13:34,283 --> 00:13:36,300 Franny, come on. You don't know what you're talking about. 241 00:13:36,333 --> 00:13:39,350 Dad, she was over here. She talked to me. 242 00:13:40,183 --> 00:13:42,233 She's not happy. 243 00:13:42,266 --> 00:13:44,150 Did she mention the beans specifically? 244 00:13:49,300 --> 00:13:51,383 Would you genug with the beans, already? 245 00:13:51,416 --> 00:13:53,133 You're gonna lose her, Pop. 246 00:13:53,166 --> 00:13:55,116 I mean, if you don't smarten up, 247 00:13:55,150 --> 00:13:57,183 you are gonna end up spending the rest of your life without her. 248 00:13:57,216 --> 00:13:58,300 Now, is that what you want? 249 00:13:58,333 --> 00:14:00,400 No, of course not. I mean, we're a team. 250 00:14:00,433 --> 00:14:02,466 Morty and Sylvia. We belong together. 251 00:14:03,000 --> 00:14:05,330 All right. Well, then here's what you're gonna do. 252 00:14:05,660 --> 00:14:07,660 You're gonna go out with us to the restaurant. 253 00:14:07,100 --> 00:14:10,483 We're gonna celebrate your anniversary, and you are gonna romance your wife. 254 00:14:11,160 --> 00:14:13,450 Okay. You got a deal. Just let me know when, that's all. 255 00:14:13,483 --> 00:14:16,316 It's Saturday night. 256 00:14:16,350 --> 00:14:18,400 Saturday? Hey. The Islanders are playing. 257 00:14:18,433 --> 00:14:20,830 [Fran] Daddy! 258 00:14:20,116 --> 00:14:22,183 All right, all right. I'll tape, I'll tape, I'll tape. 259 00:14:25,483 --> 00:14:28,330 -Hello. -Hello. 260 00:14:28,660 --> 00:14:29,466 Heard you laid a big egg last night. 261 00:14:36,183 --> 00:14:38,200 [slow music playing] 262 00:14:56,250 --> 00:15:00,433 Oh, this place is so romantic. Isn't it, Daddy? 263 00:15:00,466 --> 00:15:04,200 Huh? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Sure, sure. 264 00:15:04,233 --> 00:15:07,400 Sylvia, how about--? How about I order a skirt steak for two? 265 00:15:09,216 --> 00:15:13,116 Morty, this is a fancy restaurant. They don't have skirt steak. 266 00:15:13,150 --> 00:15:15,830 I'd like a Beef Ellington. 267 00:15:17,333 --> 00:15:19,400 Oh, God, they're talking about skirt steaks. 268 00:15:19,433 --> 00:15:21,830 How embarrassing. 269 00:15:21,116 --> 00:15:23,383 Just order Beef Ellington for the table. 270 00:15:25,233 --> 00:15:28,416 Say, Morty, I bet every man in the place 271 00:15:28,450 --> 00:15:31,133 wishes he could change places with us right now. 272 00:15:31,166 --> 00:15:32,233 Why? 273 00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:36,330 I'm sitting under a vent here. It's blowing on me. 274 00:15:37,200 --> 00:15:38,283 Sylvia, you wanna switch? 275 00:15:38,316 --> 00:15:40,250 Daddy! 276 00:15:40,283 --> 00:15:41,466 What? What? 277 00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:44,830 Your mother's got hot flashes. She'd like a breeze. 278 00:15:46,233 --> 00:15:49,000 Besides, I want the most beautiful woman in this restaurant 279 00:15:49,330 --> 00:15:50,500 to be comfortable. 280 00:15:50,400 --> 00:15:51,450 What? 281 00:15:53,150 --> 00:15:54,450 I'm trying to be nice. 282 00:15:54,483 --> 00:15:57,150 Well, cut it out. It's unsettling. 283 00:15:59,500 --> 00:16:01,660 Sylvia, I'm trying to treat you special. 284 00:16:01,100 --> 00:16:03,433 -Why now all of a sudden? -Because-- 285 00:16:04,466 --> 00:16:06,283 Because she said I should. 286 00:16:09,183 --> 00:16:12,660 Franny, this is no good. This isn't me. I'm not comfortable. 287 00:16:12,100 --> 00:16:13,283 I gotta get out of here. 288 00:16:16,166 --> 00:16:19,466 -Did you say something to your father? -No. 289 00:16:20,483 --> 00:16:22,660 He did. 290 00:16:27,400 --> 00:16:29,333 [whistling] 291 00:16:37,416 --> 00:16:40,433 Daddy, Daddy, come out here. I need to talk to you. 292 00:16:40,466 --> 00:16:43,500 Oh, excuse me. Oh, your fly's open, sir. 293 00:16:44,366 --> 00:16:47,660 Daddy, I have to talk to you. 294 00:16:47,100 --> 00:16:49,316 Oh, my God. 295 00:16:49,350 --> 00:16:52,133 What are you doing here? 296 00:16:52,166 --> 00:16:53,466 -I was just walking by. -You know each other? 297 00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:56,300 Yes. This is the doctor that Mommy's been seeing 298 00:16:56,333 --> 00:17:00,100 uh, because she's got, you know, that... 299 00:17:00,133 --> 00:17:02,333 -that, she's got-- -Carpal tunnel syndrome. 300 00:17:02,366 --> 00:17:04,450 Carpal tunnel syndrome. Carpal tunnel syndrome. 301 00:17:04,483 --> 00:17:08,266 Daddy, who's been married to my mother for 40 years, this is Dr. Razzo. 302 00:17:08,300 --> 00:17:10,500 -How do you do? -What do you say? 303 00:17:10,830 --> 00:17:11,316 Hey, look. Look, Franny, 304 00:17:11,350 --> 00:17:14,366 I'm sorry that your mother's upset with me. I really am. 305 00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:18,330 Look, I'm just not the kind of guy she needs or wants anymore. 306 00:17:18,660 --> 00:17:20,660 Your mother's at the point of her life, I think... 307 00:17:20,100 --> 00:17:22,330 Your mother needs somebody like-- 308 00:17:22,660 --> 00:17:23,400 Somebody like a guy like this. 309 00:17:23,433 --> 00:17:26,450 No, she doesn't. She does not. 310 00:17:28,100 --> 00:17:29,433 Dad, don't you love Mommy? 311 00:17:29,466 --> 00:17:32,500 Of course I love Sylvia. I'm crazy about her. 312 00:17:32,830 --> 00:17:34,830 So look, I forget things once in awhile. 313 00:17:34,116 --> 00:17:35,466 I forget things like birthdays. 314 00:17:36,000 --> 00:17:38,383 I forget to talk to her during the commercial. 315 00:17:38,416 --> 00:17:41,500 But she's got to know how much I care about her. 316 00:17:41,830 --> 00:17:44,416 Daddy-- And I meant him. 317 00:17:44,450 --> 00:17:47,350 How is she going to know if you don't tell her? 318 00:17:47,383 --> 00:17:50,500 You are gonna lose her, you know? 319 00:17:50,830 --> 00:17:51,400 Some other guy could come along. 320 00:17:51,433 --> 00:17:54,366 You know, I think that you guys have exceeded the amount of time 321 00:17:54,400 --> 00:17:56,100 two men should stay in a men's room. 322 00:17:56,133 --> 00:17:58,116 No, no, no. Let him finish. Go ahead. 323 00:17:58,150 --> 00:18:01,316 Some other guy could come along and tell Sylvia... 324 00:18:06,150 --> 00:18:10,216 all the things she really wants to hear from you. 325 00:18:14,000 --> 00:18:15,216 Come on, Daddy. 326 00:18:21,000 --> 00:18:23,433 Oh, thank you. Thank you so much. 327 00:18:23,466 --> 00:18:26,300 I know you don't see this right now, but trust me, 328 00:18:26,333 --> 00:18:29,250 someday you'll thank me for this. 329 00:18:42,100 --> 00:18:43,166 Sylvia. 330 00:18:46,283 --> 00:18:48,166 Sylvia, I don't wanna lose you. 331 00:18:51,383 --> 00:18:55,416 I'm sorry if I didn't do or say the things that... 332 00:18:55,450 --> 00:18:59,366 made you feel like you were appreciated. I'm sorry. 333 00:18:59,400 --> 00:19:03,116 I don't know where the hell our 40 years have gone. 334 00:19:03,150 --> 00:19:07,133 I look at you and I see a sweet little 16-year-old girl... 335 00:19:08,316 --> 00:19:10,316 behind the candy counter at Woolworths. 336 00:19:12,400 --> 00:19:15,366 You're wearing a pale blue dress. 337 00:19:15,400 --> 00:19:18,000 And you're eating that chocolate-covered cherry 338 00:19:18,330 --> 00:19:19,450 with the juice dripping down your mouth. 339 00:19:21,500 --> 00:19:23,000 It was marzipan. 340 00:19:24,400 --> 00:19:26,333 You remember my blue dress? 341 00:19:27,350 --> 00:19:29,166 I remember a lot of things, Sylvia. 342 00:19:31,160 --> 00:19:34,300 I just don't know why you don't know how I feel. 343 00:19:34,333 --> 00:19:37,233 I'll tell you now, Sylvia. I-- 344 00:19:38,433 --> 00:19:40,450 Oh, God, I love you. 345 00:19:44,416 --> 00:19:48,150 Morty, I love you too. I just-- 346 00:19:49,216 --> 00:19:52,000 I just don't feel special anymore. 347 00:19:53,200 --> 00:19:55,160 Our life is like... 348 00:19:58,150 --> 00:20:01,500 There are no surprises anymore. 349 00:20:04,433 --> 00:20:06,116 No surprises, huh? 350 00:20:07,450 --> 00:20:09,660 You want a surprise? 351 00:20:10,450 --> 00:20:12,283 I'll give you a surprise. 352 00:20:16,500 --> 00:20:17,416 ♪ The very thought of you ♪ 353 00:20:19,133 --> 00:20:21,400 ♪ And I forget to do ♪ 354 00:20:21,433 --> 00:20:23,450 ♪ The little ordinary things ♪ 355 00:20:23,483 --> 00:20:27,330 ♪ That everyone ought to do ♪ 356 00:20:28,283 --> 00:20:33,500 ♪ I see your face In every flower ♪ 357 00:20:33,830 --> 00:20:36,450 ♪ Your eyes in stars above ♪ 358 00:20:38,333 --> 00:20:41,183 ♪ It's just The thought of you ♪ 359 00:20:42,266 --> 00:20:44,350 ♪ The very thought of you ♪ 360 00:20:45,483 --> 00:20:50,200 ♪ My love ♪ 361 00:20:58,300 --> 00:21:01,250 Well, I don't think you have to worry about your mother 362 00:21:01,283 --> 00:21:03,150 leaving your father anymore. 363 00:21:05,333 --> 00:21:07,160 What? 364 00:21:07,500 --> 00:21:09,330 Why don't you ever sing to me? 365 00:21:11,233 --> 00:21:13,250 [slow music playing] 366 00:21:38,216 --> 00:21:39,416 [groans] 367 00:21:44,233 --> 00:21:48,266 You got a lousy review in a grammar school news flyer. 368 00:21:49,133 --> 00:21:50,316 Get over it. 369 00:21:53,333 --> 00:21:56,150 Do you think my British accent sounds fake? 370 00:21:59,466 --> 00:22:01,483 [theme music playing] 371 00:22:16,483 --> 00:22:19,000 [theme music ends]