1
00:00:02,585 --> 00:00:05,463
[instrumental music]
2
00:00:15,960 --> 00:00:18,873
(male #1 on TV)
It's gonna be critical.
They need five yards, Doug.
3
00:00:18,210 --> 00:00:22,460
Cooper sets, looks...
throws across the middle
4
00:00:22,543 --> 00:00:24,210
and it's...in and out
of the hands of Tyler
5
00:00:24,293 --> 00:00:26,043
and intercepted by..
6
00:00:26,873 --> 00:00:28,543
Yes!
7
00:00:28,626 --> 00:00:30,626
[telephone ringing]
8
00:00:34,043 --> 00:00:35,293
Hello?
9
00:00:35,376 --> 00:00:36,793
(Lois on phone)
'Oh, Clark, you're there.'
10
00:00:36,876 --> 00:00:39,876
It's horrible.
It's terrible.
11
00:00:39,960 --> 00:00:42,543
Lois!
12
00:00:42,626 --> 00:00:44,835
- What's the matter?
- Oh, you scared me.
13
00:00:44,918 --> 00:00:46,335
You said something horrible
was happening.
14
00:00:46,418 --> 00:00:50,501
Oh, no, uh..
No, it's just
that..
15
00:00:50,585 --> 00:00:52,001
Well, we're getting
married
in four days
16
00:00:52,463 --> 00:00:53,835
and I've never been
happier in my life.
17
00:00:53,918 --> 00:00:55,668
And every time that things
are going great between us
18
00:00:55,751 --> 00:00:57,873
something happens.
19
00:00:57,210 --> 00:00:58,918
And I just know that
something bad is gonna happen
20
00:00:59,001 --> 00:01:01,043
to mess up our
wedding,
I just know it.
21
00:01:02,543 --> 00:01:03,835
That's it?
22
00:01:03,918 --> 00:01:07,001
Well...yeah.
23
00:01:07,463 --> 00:01:10,873
Lois, nothing's gonna happen.
24
00:01:10,210 --> 00:01:12,501
You're just nervous,
that's all.
25
00:01:12,585 --> 00:01:14,876
- So am I.
- Really?
26
00:01:14,960 --> 00:01:18,210
Well, not as nervous as you,
but sure.
27
00:01:18,293 --> 00:01:19,960
Look, we took
the whole week off.
28
00:01:20,043 --> 00:01:21,501
We have no stories
to investigate.
29
00:01:21,585 --> 00:01:23,001
It's gonna be fine.
30
00:01:23,463 --> 00:01:24,585
The scariest thing
that's gonna happen
31
00:01:24,668 --> 00:01:26,043
is that tomorrow night
32
00:01:26,873 --> 00:01:28,463
we've to pick our parents
up at the airport.
33
00:01:28,168 --> 00:01:30,543
[chuckles]
34
00:01:30,626 --> 00:01:32,335
Oh, I just...
35
00:01:32,418 --> 00:01:35,043
I just have the
strangest
feeling all evening.
36
00:01:35,873 --> 00:01:36,043
Okay.
37
00:01:44,873 --> 00:01:45,418
[chuckles]
38
00:01:46,585 --> 00:01:48,751
Nope.
Not a bad guy in sight.
39
00:01:54,626 --> 00:01:55,710
Ugh. You must think--
40
00:01:55,793 --> 00:01:57,001
Lois Lane.
41
00:01:58,251 --> 00:02:00,418
I have a delivery for you.
42
00:02:00,501 --> 00:02:02,835
[grunts]
43
00:02:02,918 --> 00:02:05,463
Sorry.
44
00:02:05,168 --> 00:02:06,751
Nice grip.
45
00:02:06,835 --> 00:02:08,751
Sign here, please.
46
00:02:21,751 --> 00:02:25,543
See? Everything's gonna be
just fine.
47
00:02:25,626 --> 00:02:26,751
Yeah.
48
00:02:32,168 --> 00:02:33,751
They're dead.
49
00:02:33,835 --> 00:02:35,918
Maybe you were the last stop
on his delivery route.
50
00:02:36,001 --> 00:02:38,001
You know, they were fine
this morning, but now--
51
00:02:38,463 --> 00:02:40,626
There's no note.
See? I told you. It's
starting.
52
00:02:40,710 --> 00:02:43,793
Lois, the only thing
starting is this.
53
00:02:54,043 --> 00:02:57,001
[theme music]
54
00:03:14,626 --> 00:03:17,585
[music continues]
55
00:03:34,418 --> 00:03:37,376
[music continues]
56
00:03:57,463 --> 00:04:00,463
[thunder rumbling]
57
00:04:05,293 --> 00:04:06,960
[piano music]
58
00:04:07,043 --> 00:04:08,918
(Lois)
'Well, why don't you just
check the computer again?'
59
00:04:09,001 --> 00:04:12,168
'It's under Lane. L-A-N-E.'
60
00:04:12,251 --> 00:04:13,710
Maybe they didn't
spell it right.
61
00:04:13,793 --> 00:04:15,376
(male #2)
There are no
rooms
available.
62
00:04:15,460 --> 00:04:16,960
What do you mean,
there are no rooms?
63
00:04:17,043 --> 00:04:19,668
I made reservations a month
ago.
I confirmed them yesterday.
64
00:04:19,751 --> 00:04:22,251
Yes, ma'am but the
people
staying in your rooms
65
00:04:22,335 --> 00:04:23,418
haven't checked out.
66
00:04:23,501 --> 00:04:25,043
Well, I don't care
if they've put up tents.
67
00:04:25,873 --> 00:04:26,710
Just put them someplace else.
68
00:04:26,793 --> 00:04:29,543
I'm sorry
but there's no
room.
69
00:04:29,626 --> 00:04:33,463
Metropolis is socked in
and nobody can get a flight
out.
70
00:04:33,168 --> 00:04:34,585
Oh, God, what a disaster.
71
00:04:34,668 --> 00:04:36,626
I knew this wedding
would never go off.
72
00:04:36,710 --> 00:04:38,463
We'll probably end up
sleeping in alleys--
73
00:04:38,168 --> 00:04:39,585
Mother.
74
00:04:39,668 --> 00:04:41,585
Perhaps you'd like us to try
another hotel for you.
75
00:04:41,668 --> 00:04:43,876
[clearing throat]
They're all booked.
76
00:04:43,960 --> 00:04:47,668
Even the motels.
A dozen conventions are in
town.
77
00:04:47,751 --> 00:04:50,168
Listen, perhaps someone
with adjoining suites
78
00:04:50,251 --> 00:04:51,376
would consider consolidating
79
00:04:51,460 --> 00:04:53,460
and then we could sort
of...
take their--
80
00:04:53,543 --> 00:04:55,168
Look, my wedding
is in three days.
81
00:04:55,251 --> 00:04:57,293
'I have relatives flying in
from all over the country.'
82
00:04:57,376 --> 00:05:00,001
That is assuming they can
land.
And we're tired and we're wet
83
00:05:00,463 --> 00:05:01,710
and I have a very loud voice.
84
00:05:01,793 --> 00:05:03,463
So I don't care
if the President of
85
00:05:03,168 --> 00:05:04,751
the United States
is in my room.
86
00:05:04,835 --> 00:05:06,960
I want them out of there
or I'm going--
87
00:05:07,043 --> 00:05:10,043
Threats against the President
are a felony, ma'am.
88
00:05:10,873 --> 00:05:12,251
Punishable by imprisonment.
89
00:05:12,335 --> 00:05:14,293
I'm sure they have
rooms there.
90
00:05:14,376 --> 00:05:17,376
[indistinct chatter]
91
00:05:18,335 --> 00:05:20,460
- Mr. President.
- Lois Lane.
92
00:05:20,543 --> 00:05:21,710
Good to see you.
93
00:05:21,793 --> 00:05:23,376
Hated that story
you and Clark Kent did
94
00:05:23,460 --> 00:05:25,043
'on my tax increase proposal.'
95
00:05:25,873 --> 00:05:27,210
Oh, and congratulations.
96
00:05:27,293 --> 00:05:28,251
Thank you.
97
00:05:29,668 --> 00:05:30,793
Have a nice wedding.
98
00:05:32,168 --> 00:05:34,501
What do we do now?
99
00:05:34,585 --> 00:05:36,873
We can go to plan "B."
100
00:05:38,501 --> 00:05:39,626
Whatever that is.
101
00:05:39,710 --> 00:05:42,668
[raining]
102
00:05:42,751 --> 00:05:46,873
Uhh! Well, you certainly
came well prepared.
103
00:05:46,210 --> 00:05:47,835
Too bad I
didn't
bring a room.
104
00:05:47,918 --> 00:05:49,626
Oh, God, I
could
use a drink.
105
00:05:49,710 --> 00:05:51,585
Pity I gave that up.
106
00:05:51,668 --> 00:05:54,873
This has gotta be
the worst night of my
life..
107
00:05:54,210 --> 00:05:55,835
...excluding
our
first date.
108
00:05:55,918 --> 00:05:57,501
Maybe she could sleep
on the fire escape.
109
00:05:57,585 --> 00:06:00,376
Mom, dad, I'm sure this
situation is only temporary.
110
00:06:00,460 --> 00:06:02,460
Yeah, I'll call the
hotel
first thing in the
morning.
111
00:06:02,543 --> 00:06:05,873
Would, would anybody like
to have some nice hot tea?
112
00:06:05,210 --> 00:06:06,668
That sounds great.
113
00:06:06,751 --> 00:06:10,626
Lois, what if Lucy can't get
in?
Who'll be your maid of honor?
114
00:06:10,710 --> 00:06:13,460
Oh, I know.
You can ask
Cindy.
115
00:06:13,543 --> 00:06:15,418
I mean, she would be thrilled.
116
00:06:15,501 --> 00:06:17,210
Maybe you ought to call her
right now, just to warn her.
117
00:06:17,293 --> 00:06:18,168
Uh, mom--
118
00:06:18,251 --> 00:06:19,668
Cindy? Your cousin, Cindy?
119
00:06:19,751 --> 00:06:22,001
If your sister doesn't show,
you've gotta have somebody.
120
00:06:22,463 --> 00:06:24,585
I mean, she invited you to all
her weddings. You didn't go.
121
00:06:24,668 --> 00:06:26,463
You were too busy.
You owe it to her.
122
00:06:26,168 --> 00:06:27,876
Mother, her receptions
lasted longer
123
00:06:27,960 --> 00:06:29,835
than both of her marriages.
124
00:06:29,918 --> 00:06:32,463
She's gonna drive me mad.
125
00:06:32,168 --> 00:06:33,501
She's just anxious, honey.
126
00:06:33,585 --> 00:06:36,168
I am this
close
to losing it.
127
00:06:36,251 --> 00:06:38,668
Lois sweety, you've been
slouching a little lately.
128
00:06:38,751 --> 00:06:41,835
You don't wanna do that when you
come walking down the aisle.
129
00:06:41,918 --> 00:06:43,418
[screaming]
130
00:06:43,501 --> 00:06:44,793
What?
131
00:06:47,251 --> 00:06:49,293
Lois, Clark, what are
you two doing here?
132
00:06:49,376 --> 00:06:50,543
Perry, I need a story.
133
00:06:50,626 --> 00:06:52,251
Something big,
horrible and
complex
134
00:06:52,335 --> 00:06:53,918
that'll get my
mind
off my parents.
135
00:06:54,001 --> 00:06:55,835
Preferably something
out of the country.
136
00:06:55,918 --> 00:06:59,251
I see she's entered phase two,
the manic stage.
137
00:06:59,335 --> 00:07:01,043
'Hold on to your spurs.'
138
00:07:01,873 --> 00:07:03,873
Yeah, maybe you could
just
give us a little story.
139
00:07:03,210 --> 00:07:05,626
You know, something
that would take two
hours.
140
00:07:05,710 --> 00:07:07,585
Oh, I got
just the thing.
141
00:07:07,668 --> 00:07:10,543
Uh, Lois, thank Elvis,
you two are here.
142
00:07:10,626 --> 00:07:12,418
I got a page one,
I need you on.
143
00:07:12,501 --> 00:07:15,668
Now Jimmy, give me that file
off
my desk. Will you please, sir?
144
00:07:15,751 --> 00:07:17,710
- One file, comin' up.
- Perry, you're the best.
145
00:07:17,793 --> 00:07:19,876
What's it about,
government
corruption
146
00:07:19,960 --> 00:07:23,043
banking scandal,
celebrity
infidelities?
147
00:07:23,793 --> 00:07:26,210
- Frogs.
- Frogs?
148
00:07:26,293 --> 00:07:28,210
Oh, not just any kind of frogs
149
00:07:28,293 --> 00:07:31,501
very rare and valuable frogs
from the South Pacific.
150
00:07:31,585 --> 00:07:33,918
All green and yellow.
Fantastic growth rate.
151
00:07:34,001 --> 00:07:36,668
People have been importing them
as pets for years.
152
00:07:36,751 --> 00:07:39,668
Now it turns out they may be
a medical miracle.
153
00:07:39,751 --> 00:07:42,251
And a bunch of them
got stolen last night
154
00:07:42,335 --> 00:07:44,543
from Phil's Exotic Pet Palace.
155
00:07:44,626 --> 00:07:47,418
So, now, this is big.
156
00:07:47,501 --> 00:07:48,918
'So hop to. Let's move.'
157
00:07:49,001 --> 00:07:51,043
Thanks, Perry.
You saved my sanity.
158
00:07:51,873 --> 00:07:52,918
See you at the rehearsal.
159
00:07:55,710 --> 00:07:57,876
Then about five years ago,
scientists found out
160
00:07:57,960 --> 00:08:01,501
that the doppelbufo frog
cell nucleus contains DNA
161
00:08:01,585 --> 00:08:04,168
that when grafted to the DNA
from another animal
162
00:08:04,251 --> 00:08:06,293
help make perfect
biological copies
163
00:08:06,376 --> 00:08:08,463
to whatever
the second animal was.
164
00:08:08,168 --> 00:08:09,418
You mean clone them?
165
00:08:09,501 --> 00:08:12,210
Yes. So far,
it's only been tried on
mice.
166
00:08:12,293 --> 00:08:14,751
So the only thing that
was
taken was these frogs?
167
00:08:14,835 --> 00:08:17,001
That's right.
None of the more valuable
pets.
168
00:08:17,463 --> 00:08:19,043
Just the doppelbufos.
169
00:08:19,873 --> 00:08:20,585
I came in about
7:00 this morning
170
00:08:20,668 --> 00:08:22,876
and discovered the front door
had been jimmied.
171
00:08:22,960 --> 00:08:25,210
A rogue medical researcher,
no doubt.
172
00:08:25,293 --> 00:08:27,001
Is there anything else you can
tell us about these frogs?
173
00:08:27,463 --> 00:08:30,876
No. Except they have
a very fast metabolism
174
00:08:30,960 --> 00:08:33,293
'due to some unusual
enzymes they have'
175
00:08:33,376 --> 00:08:36,873
which makes them hungry
most of the time.
176
00:08:36,210 --> 00:08:38,501
And if they can't make enough
of their own enzymes
177
00:08:38,585 --> 00:08:41,335
they'll happily turn on
each other for them.
178
00:08:44,376 --> 00:08:46,463
[sighs]
179
00:08:48,335 --> 00:08:50,543
I can't believe..
180
00:08:50,626 --> 00:08:53,335
...that you took the car
like that.
181
00:08:53,418 --> 00:08:56,043
Oh, I forgot.
You're clones.
182
00:08:56,873 --> 00:08:59,626
You may have the exact face
of the President
183
00:08:59,710 --> 00:09:03,873
but you've got the exact brain
as this cufflink.
184
00:09:03,210 --> 00:09:05,001
I was hungry.
185
00:09:05,463 --> 00:09:07,168
- It's not like anybody saw
us.
- Yeah.
186
00:09:07,251 --> 00:09:08,418
How would you have explained
187
00:09:08,501 --> 00:09:10,710
that the leader
of the free world
188
00:09:10,793 --> 00:09:13,251
is knocking off
a pet shop, huh?
189
00:09:13,335 --> 00:09:15,293
'And you wouldn't have been
able
to explain it, anyway.'
190
00:09:15,376 --> 00:09:17,668
'Cause you'd have a
frog in your throat.
191
00:09:17,751 --> 00:09:20,001
I'm sorry.
We're just
nervous.
192
00:09:20,463 --> 00:09:21,668
Yeah, this is never gonna work.
193
00:09:21,751 --> 00:09:23,668
Ever since that assassination
attempt, last month
194
00:09:23,751 --> 00:09:25,501
security around the President
has been tighter than ever.
195
00:09:25,585 --> 00:09:27,293
- Yeah.
- Alright.
196
00:09:27,376 --> 00:09:30,710
Let's go back to clone
school,
shall we?
197
00:09:30,793 --> 00:09:32,168
Now, you listen up.
198
00:09:32,251 --> 00:09:34,876
You're exact copies
of the president
199
00:09:34,960 --> 00:09:39,668
and the man in charge of the
secret service detail. Got
that?
200
00:09:39,751 --> 00:09:41,626
If fact, you are so exact
201
00:09:41,710 --> 00:09:45,873
that the President's wife
couldn't tell you apart.
202
00:09:45,210 --> 00:09:48,168
What about when I burp?
203
00:09:48,251 --> 00:09:50,293
Oh, God.
204
00:09:50,376 --> 00:09:52,376
Six months away
from curing cancer
205
00:09:52,460 --> 00:09:54,376
and I give it up for this.
206
00:09:54,460 --> 00:09:56,251
[chuckling]
207
00:09:56,335 --> 00:09:59,335
[telephone rings]
208
00:10:01,460 --> 00:10:04,501
Dr. Mamba. Oh, yes, sir.
209
00:10:04,585 --> 00:10:05,876
Of course, sir.
210
00:10:05,960 --> 00:10:08,873
No, everything is fine, sir.
211
00:10:08,210 --> 00:10:10,710
They're feeling great
and ready to go.
212
00:10:10,793 --> 00:10:12,585
Yes, sir. Absolutely.
213
00:10:12,668 --> 00:10:15,873
By tomorrow, we'll have
a new President. One of ours.
214
00:10:15,210 --> 00:10:16,543
[chuckling]
215
00:10:16,626 --> 00:10:19,376
Oh, they're, they're very
eager.
Eager, eager. Yeah, yeah.
216
00:10:19,460 --> 00:10:22,960
They're nodding their heads.
Yes, sir. Thank you.
217
00:10:23,043 --> 00:10:24,001
Goodbye.
218
00:10:32,418 --> 00:10:34,543
Don't make me
tell him the truth.
219
00:10:34,626 --> 00:10:37,876
- Hey, I'm still hungry.
- Me, too.
220
00:10:37,960 --> 00:10:41,543
"I'm hungry, I'm a mutant,
I have needs." Huh?
221
00:10:44,918 --> 00:10:46,876
Alright.
222
00:10:46,960 --> 00:10:48,918
- I'll give you one each.
- Okay.
223
00:10:49,001 --> 00:10:52,835
You know, it's not good to
eat
after 10:00 at night.
224
00:11:00,168 --> 00:11:03,293
Housekeeping. I just came in
to turn down the..
225
00:11:03,376 --> 00:11:04,501
[gasps]
226
00:11:04,585 --> 00:11:06,543
- Grab her!
- Aah!
227
00:11:09,876 --> 00:11:10,960
And how do I get from
the stage to the limo
228
00:11:11,043 --> 00:11:12,460
in case, I need to
leave in a hurry?
229
00:11:12,543 --> 00:11:15,626
They may not take too kindly
to my tax increase proposal.
230
00:11:15,710 --> 00:11:18,460
We have a secure route through
the wings to the side bar, sir.
231
00:11:18,543 --> 00:11:20,873
Excellent.
232
00:11:20,210 --> 00:11:21,460
Thought you might like
to see the game
233
00:11:21,543 --> 00:11:22,793
in wide-screen tonight, sir?
234
00:11:22,876 --> 00:11:24,876
Oh, all the better to
watch your Tar Heels
235
00:11:24,960 --> 00:11:26,001
get their butts kicked.
236
00:11:26,463 --> 00:11:27,293
Never happen.
237
00:11:27,376 --> 00:11:28,918
I thought you said
you were on your way up
238
00:11:29,001 --> 00:11:30,668
in the passenger elevator.
239
00:11:30,751 --> 00:11:34,168
Did I?
I meant "Service."
240
00:11:34,251 --> 00:11:36,873
We came up in
the service elevator.
241
00:11:36,210 --> 00:11:39,873
In fact, do me a favor,
take it back down to the
garage.
242
00:11:39,210 --> 00:11:41,873
Let 'em know that we roll
in 15 minutes.
243
00:11:41,210 --> 00:11:42,210
Will do.
244
00:11:47,793 --> 00:11:49,793
Sir, we're..
245
00:11:49,876 --> 00:11:51,168
[gunshot]
246
00:11:51,251 --> 00:11:52,793
Nighty night.
247
00:11:55,835 --> 00:11:57,293
[chuckles]
248
00:11:57,376 --> 00:11:59,043
- What in the--
- Ah, no screaming.
249
00:11:59,873 --> 00:12:00,168
That's not dignified.
250
00:12:01,460 --> 00:12:04,918
(male #3)
'Sweet dreams, Mr. President.'
251
00:12:05,001 --> 00:12:07,543
Certainly cheaper
than an election, isn't it?
252
00:12:07,626 --> 00:12:10,873
Change clothes.
253
00:12:10,210 --> 00:12:12,835
Then we'll put his body
in the passageway.
254
00:12:17,293 --> 00:12:19,168
[horns honking]
255
00:12:20,668 --> 00:12:22,793
Look, what you did to my
car.
How could you do that?
256
00:12:22,876 --> 00:12:26,463
What I did to your car?
You were in my lane.
257
00:12:30,463 --> 00:12:31,918
Hey, I got you
there,
didn't I?
258
00:12:32,001 --> 00:12:34,793
[bell ringing]
259
00:12:34,876 --> 00:12:38,626
Hey, buddy, don't try
and cut in front of me!
260
00:12:38,710 --> 00:12:41,293
Lois, Lois, relax.
We've got plenty of time.
261
00:12:41,376 --> 00:12:43,210
The rehearsal's not
till 2:30.
262
00:12:43,293 --> 00:12:45,626
Clark, don't you
remember?
We moved it up to noon.
263
00:12:45,710 --> 00:12:49,043
The minister's got
that important
meeting.
264
00:12:49,873 --> 00:12:52,876
- Yo, come on.
- We've gotta get through.
265
00:12:52,960 --> 00:12:56,460
Oh, we're cooked. I can
practically hear my mother
now.
266
00:12:56,543 --> 00:12:58,376
[telephone ringing]
267
00:12:58,460 --> 00:13:00,210
Uncanny how that works.
268
00:13:02,460 --> 00:13:04,168
Yes, mother?
269
00:13:04,251 --> 00:13:07,210
I know we're supposed to
be
there. We're stuck in
traffic.
270
00:13:07,293 --> 00:13:09,251
But not for long.
271
00:13:10,501 --> 00:13:12,463
What?
272
00:13:12,168 --> 00:13:13,418
What? I can't hear you.
273
00:13:13,501 --> 00:13:15,835
Two things cannot be
in the same place--
274
00:13:15,918 --> 00:13:18,873
Excuse me, folks, excuse me,
can I help you here?
275
00:13:18,210 --> 00:13:20,873
Excuse us,
we're talking
here.
276
00:13:24,251 --> 00:13:26,626
No, I haven't made
my mind up about Cindy.
277
00:13:29,960 --> 00:13:32,751
Look mom, I've gotta go. The
accident's about to clear up.
278
00:13:36,835 --> 00:13:38,668
[sighs]
279
00:13:38,751 --> 00:13:41,168
You are going to
come in pretty
handy.
280
00:13:41,251 --> 00:13:43,251
You should see me
take out the garbage.
281
00:13:43,335 --> 00:13:44,835
[chuckles]
282
00:13:47,585 --> 00:13:48,710
Hmm..
283
00:13:50,960 --> 00:13:53,463
'ATM machines
have hidden cameras.'
284
00:13:53,168 --> 00:13:55,376
Looks like our frog-napper
may have made a deposit
285
00:13:55,460 --> 00:13:58,001
he wasn't aware of.
286
00:13:58,463 --> 00:13:59,960
[horn honking]
287
00:14:01,876 --> 00:14:04,876
And then my second wedding was
in the Dominican Republic
288
00:14:04,960 --> 00:14:06,460
or was it my third?
289
00:14:06,543 --> 00:14:07,960
Anyway, we got
the whole thing annulled
290
00:14:08,043 --> 00:14:11,293
and I enrolled
in bullfighting school.
291
00:14:11,376 --> 00:14:12,626
So have you ever
been married?
292
00:14:12,710 --> 00:14:14,668
You know sometimes,
I think she does this
293
00:14:14,751 --> 00:14:16,873
just to make me anxious.
294
00:14:16,210 --> 00:14:18,585
You know, keep the upper hand
and all of that.
295
00:14:18,668 --> 00:14:20,918
Oh, I'm sure it's the
traffic,
just like she said.
296
00:14:21,001 --> 00:14:23,543
Wait a minute, those are not
birds of paradise.
297
00:14:23,626 --> 00:14:26,668
I distinctly ordered
birds of paradise!
298
00:14:26,751 --> 00:14:29,668
Now, what nitwit
changed that?
299
00:14:29,751 --> 00:14:32,001
[sighs]
300
00:14:32,463 --> 00:14:35,501
- This nitwit.
- Oh.
301
00:14:35,585 --> 00:14:37,876
Hello, hello,
hello,
I'm Reverend Bob.
302
00:14:37,960 --> 00:14:39,210
I'll be your
host
this
afternoon.
303
00:14:39,293 --> 00:14:40,835
Hello, how are you?
304
00:14:40,918 --> 00:14:43,918
What are the seven scariest
words in the English language?
305
00:14:46,043 --> 00:14:48,293
"I now pronounce you
man and wife."
306
00:14:48,376 --> 00:14:49,460
[chuckles]
307
00:14:49,543 --> 00:14:51,001
Funny.
308
00:14:51,463 --> 00:14:53,543
Hey, how many brides does it
take to screw in a light
bulb?
309
00:14:53,626 --> 00:14:55,001
- I don't know.
- Well, neither do they.
310
00:14:55,463 --> 00:14:57,876
That's why they have
wedding coordinators.
311
00:14:57,960 --> 00:15:00,668
- You hired him?
- Don't start.
312
00:15:00,751 --> 00:15:02,463
Uh, sorry we're late.
313
00:15:02,168 --> 00:15:03,710
Oh, hey, look, no problem,
you can be late for
314
00:15:03,793 --> 00:15:05,501
the rehearsal, you can even
be late for the wedding
315
00:15:05,585 --> 00:15:08,335
just make sure you're not
late
with my check. Hiyo!
316
00:15:08,418 --> 00:15:10,293
What were we thinking of?
317
00:15:10,376 --> 00:15:12,668
(Bob)
Okay, let's start with
the rehearsal now, shall we?
318
00:15:12,751 --> 00:15:15,501
Okay, starting with
the terrified bachelor
319
00:15:15,585 --> 00:15:16,710
right over here.
320
00:15:16,793 --> 00:15:19,043
- And the best man?
- Oh, that's me.
321
00:15:19,873 --> 00:15:20,835
Okay, you'll be
standing
right over here
322
00:15:20,918 --> 00:15:23,668
wondering if you,
uh,
forgot the ring or
not.
323
00:15:23,751 --> 00:15:25,210
Okay, then the organ
will play the music.
324
00:15:25,293 --> 00:15:26,835
[gibbering]
325
00:15:26,918 --> 00:15:30,873
'Then the groom's mama
will be led down the aisle'
326
00:15:30,210 --> 00:15:31,418
followed by the groom's dada
327
00:15:31,501 --> 00:15:33,376
not to be confused
with the art movement.
328
00:15:34,918 --> 00:15:38,418
'Then we got the bride's mommy,
followed by the bridesmaids.'
329
00:15:38,501 --> 00:15:40,835
And then we have
the maid of honor who is..
330
00:15:43,710 --> 00:15:46,751
Uh...still trying to
make it in.
331
00:15:48,251 --> 00:15:51,210
Hey, what's the difference
between a maid of honor
332
00:15:51,293 --> 00:15:53,543
and a maid's honor?
333
00:15:53,626 --> 00:15:54,960
About seven beers.
334
00:15:55,043 --> 00:15:56,960
[imitating Herman Munster]
335
00:15:57,043 --> 00:15:59,626
I made a funny, Lily.
336
00:15:59,710 --> 00:16:01,543
'Ba-dump bump. Thank you.
Tip the waitresses.'
337
00:16:01,626 --> 00:16:04,168
Uh, Reverend Bob, can we just
kinda get on with the..
338
00:16:04,251 --> 00:16:06,001
I'm sorry. Of course.
You're, you're right.
339
00:16:06,463 --> 00:16:08,585
I was just practicing
my routine a little.
340
00:16:08,668 --> 00:16:10,873
- Your routine?
- Yeah, yeah.
341
00:16:10,210 --> 00:16:12,168
I have a try-out
this afternoon.
342
00:16:12,251 --> 00:16:13,876
King Neptune Cruise Lines.
343
00:16:13,960 --> 00:16:15,418
There's an open audition
for a new comedian
344
00:16:15,501 --> 00:16:16,751
on one of the cruise ships.
345
00:16:16,835 --> 00:16:18,585
That was the important meeting?
346
00:16:18,668 --> 00:16:22,335
Six islands, seven nights,
all the shrimp you can eat.
347
00:16:22,418 --> 00:16:25,001
What'd the porcupine say to
his wife on their wedding
night?
348
00:16:25,463 --> 00:16:26,460
Come on, stay with me.
349
00:16:26,543 --> 00:16:30,626
Sir, everything went off
without a hitch.
350
00:16:30,710 --> 00:16:33,043
There wasn't even
a hint of a hitch.
351
00:16:33,873 --> 00:16:35,293
It was hitch less.
352
00:16:35,376 --> 00:16:37,418
'Oh, oh, they're resting
quietly now'
353
00:16:37,501 --> 00:16:39,043
but they're not
talking very much.
354
00:16:39,873 --> 00:16:41,293
Oh, there's the President.
355
00:16:41,376 --> 00:16:42,710
'He's gonna announce
phase two.'
356
00:16:42,793 --> 00:16:45,335
Get to a television set
if you've got one..
357
00:16:45,418 --> 00:16:49,418
Well, I didn't mean if you
got
one. I'm sure you got--
358
00:16:49,501 --> 00:16:50,835
[sighs]
359
00:16:50,918 --> 00:16:53,960
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
I am an idiot.
360
00:16:54,043 --> 00:16:55,793
Thank you, sir.
Your compliments.
361
00:16:55,876 --> 00:16:58,543
Much thought and consideration
362
00:16:58,626 --> 00:17:00,876
and in contrast to
my previous position
363
00:17:00,960 --> 00:17:03,460
I have decided to endorse
the proposed
364
00:17:03,543 --> 00:17:06,873
tax decrease for the upcoming..
365
00:17:06,210 --> 00:17:09,501
Decrease? Just yesterday he was
talking about an increase.
366
00:17:09,585 --> 00:17:11,626
Maybe a good night's
sleep
on a nice, soft
367
00:17:11,710 --> 00:17:14,376
hotel mattress
changed his
mind.
368
00:17:14,460 --> 00:17:17,376
Do I detect a hint
of annoyance?
369
00:17:17,460 --> 00:17:18,960
Okay, I'll try
the hotel again.
370
00:17:19,043 --> 00:17:21,873
- May I?
- Yes, please.
371
00:17:21,210 --> 00:17:23,960
Could you call the airlines,
too? I'm worried about Lucy.
372
00:17:24,043 --> 00:17:28,501
C.K! A messenger just
dropped this off for you.
373
00:17:28,585 --> 00:17:31,751
Oh. Let's see
what Mr. ATM has to
say.
374
00:17:38,210 --> 00:17:40,168
The ATM camera records
every 10 seconds.
375
00:17:40,251 --> 00:17:43,335
I asked the bank if we
could
make photos of the tape.
376
00:17:43,418 --> 00:17:45,168
You can't see the pet store
on this angle.
377
00:17:45,251 --> 00:17:48,501
Sure you can, it's right here
in the background. Kinda
fuzzy.
378
00:17:48,585 --> 00:17:52,376
Oh, look. There's Elvis
and Jimmy Hoffa...
379
00:17:52,460 --> 00:17:54,668
and the plot
to "Showgirls."
380
00:17:54,751 --> 00:17:57,463
Actually, there
is
someone there.
381
00:18:02,251 --> 00:18:03,585
What's he look like?
382
00:18:03,668 --> 00:18:07,043
Like the head of the
President's
secret service detail.
383
00:18:07,873 --> 00:18:10,543
The secret service
is stealing frogs?
384
00:18:10,626 --> 00:18:14,751
I can't be sure but
I do have a license
number.
385
00:18:14,835 --> 00:18:16,168
Jimmy! Jimmy.
386
00:18:17,793 --> 00:18:19,460
Could you run this license
plate
for me, please?
387
00:18:19,543 --> 00:18:21,501
- Yeah.
- Thanks.
388
00:18:26,626 --> 00:18:27,876
Lois, is everything alight?
389
00:18:27,960 --> 00:18:29,460
This is just so typical.
390
00:18:29,543 --> 00:18:31,626
You want a big story,
you're disappointed.
391
00:18:31,710 --> 00:18:34,001
You think it's a
simple frog-napping.
392
00:18:34,463 --> 00:18:36,043
Then the secret service
is involved.
393
00:18:36,873 --> 00:18:38,710
National security,
foreign intrigue.
394
00:18:38,793 --> 00:18:41,710
This could be it.
This could be the Pulitzer.
395
00:18:41,793 --> 00:18:44,668
But...you've got
your wedding to consider.
396
00:18:44,751 --> 00:18:46,001
So, what are you supposed to do?
397
00:18:46,463 --> 00:18:48,793
You want the Pulitzer,
but you want your wedding.
398
00:18:48,876 --> 00:18:50,918
Do you forget the Pulitzer
or do you forget your wedding?
399
00:18:51,001 --> 00:18:52,626
See, I knew something
bad was gonna happen
400
00:18:52,710 --> 00:18:54,751
no matter what I do,
there's always a part of me
401
00:18:54,835 --> 00:18:56,463
that wants to be doing
something else.
402
00:18:56,168 --> 00:18:59,463
Lois, honey..
Nothing's gonna
happen.
403
00:18:59,168 --> 00:19:01,585
- What did you say?
- Lois.
404
00:19:01,668 --> 00:19:03,710
After that.
405
00:19:03,793 --> 00:19:05,460
Honey.
406
00:19:05,543 --> 00:19:07,751
That's the first time
you've ever called me that.
407
00:19:07,835 --> 00:19:09,585
[chuckles]
408
00:19:09,668 --> 00:19:12,463
Say it again.
409
00:19:12,168 --> 00:19:14,210
Honey.
410
00:19:14,293 --> 00:19:16,501
That's amazing.
411
00:19:16,585 --> 00:19:18,043
I like it.
412
00:19:18,873 --> 00:19:20,668
I never thought of myself
as a honey.
413
00:19:21,835 --> 00:19:23,460
What's happening to me?
414
00:19:25,710 --> 00:19:28,335
So, do you got, uh..
415
00:19:28,418 --> 00:19:30,668
...got any
other names in mind?
416
00:19:30,751 --> 00:19:32,876
Oh.
Sweetheart?
417
00:19:32,960 --> 00:19:35,251
- Hmm.
- Darling.
418
00:19:36,376 --> 00:19:40,293
My little...tornado.
419
00:19:40,376 --> 00:19:42,626
Oh, this is disgusting.
420
00:19:48,251 --> 00:19:50,710
[clearing throat]
421
00:19:50,793 --> 00:19:54,043
Um, that license you guys
gave me was to a rental car.
422
00:19:54,873 --> 00:19:55,501
'It belongs to
a corporate account'
423
00:19:55,585 --> 00:19:57,873
'at a place called Greentech.'
424
00:19:57,210 --> 00:19:59,376
The name on the account
is Dr. Isaac Mamba.
425
00:19:59,460 --> 00:20:00,793
He's some kind of
biologist working on
426
00:20:00,876 --> 00:20:02,626
'cloning and
accelerated growth.'
427
00:20:02,710 --> 00:20:06,501
Get this. His research,
it involves exotic frogs.
428
00:20:07,793 --> 00:20:09,251
Wow, Clark, we've
got
to talk to him.
429
00:20:09,335 --> 00:20:12,501
Well, I can try to find him
but your mom's on line one.
430
00:20:15,168 --> 00:20:17,251
Hi, mom.
431
00:20:17,335 --> 00:20:18,960
I-I can't understand you.
432
00:20:19,043 --> 00:20:21,873
'Well, move the ice bag.'
433
00:20:21,210 --> 00:20:23,751
What? Well, can't we just..
434
00:20:23,835 --> 00:20:25,293
[sighs]
435
00:20:25,376 --> 00:20:28,918
I see. Alright, bye.
Yeah. Keep your feet elevated.
436
00:20:30,043 --> 00:20:31,501
The rehearsal dinner
is canceled.
437
00:20:31,585 --> 00:20:34,001
The restaurant was closed
by the board of health.
438
00:20:34,463 --> 00:20:37,210
Everything else is booked.
We are doomed.
439
00:20:37,293 --> 00:20:39,376
- Lois.
- Yes, Clark?
440
00:20:39,460 --> 00:20:41,835
Not every place is booked.
441
00:20:48,835 --> 00:20:51,251
Exactly how guilt-ridden
should I feel about this?
442
00:20:51,335 --> 00:20:52,793
Um, not very.
443
00:20:52,876 --> 00:20:56,873
One slice of pepperoni
pizza's
only about 400 calories.
444
00:20:56,210 --> 00:20:57,626
Not the food.
445
00:20:57,710 --> 00:21:00,293
The fact that we're eating it
without parental supervision.
446
00:21:00,376 --> 00:21:01,835
Hey, you had
nothing
to do with
447
00:21:01,918 --> 00:21:04,585
that restaurant
getting shut
down.
448
00:21:04,668 --> 00:21:06,043
No, but..
449
00:21:08,251 --> 00:21:10,501
Clark..
450
00:21:10,585 --> 00:21:12,710
...marrying you..
451
00:21:12,793 --> 00:21:15,960
...is the most remarkable
thing
that's ever happened to me.
452
00:21:18,210 --> 00:21:20,710
And in all this craziness..
453
00:21:20,793 --> 00:21:22,793
...all I really wanted was
a few minutes alone
454
00:21:22,876 --> 00:21:24,335
with you to tell you that.
455
00:21:25,293 --> 00:21:26,876
Actually, I think..
456
00:21:26,960 --> 00:21:29,543
...everyone's glad
to have the night
off.
457
00:21:30,918 --> 00:21:34,001
Except for the toast.
Daddy loves giving toasts.
458
00:21:34,463 --> 00:21:37,876
Oh. So I guess right about
now
he'd probably be saying..
459
00:21:39,168 --> 00:21:42,835
...how sorry he
was
to have left home
460
00:21:42,918 --> 00:21:45,918
because...he missed out on
461
00:21:46,001 --> 00:21:48,960
seeing his little girl..
462
00:21:49,043 --> 00:21:52,835
...grow up into the
most
lovely woman..
463
00:21:54,501 --> 00:21:56,335
...that anyone has ever seen.
464
00:21:58,710 --> 00:22:01,335
And my mother would say
it served him right.
465
00:22:03,793 --> 00:22:05,668
But then she'd admit..
466
00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:09,168
...that if teaching
their child
467
00:22:09,251 --> 00:22:11,793
the value of love
was important..
468
00:22:13,335 --> 00:22:15,043
...they'd done their job.
469
00:22:16,210 --> 00:22:17,335
Mm-hmm.
470
00:22:22,001 --> 00:22:23,793
And your parents..
471
00:22:23,876 --> 00:22:25,293
Hmm?
472
00:22:25,376 --> 00:22:28,460
Would remind me that
473
00:22:28,543 --> 00:22:32,043
the son that came to them
as the most special of gifts..
474
00:22:33,376 --> 00:22:34,960
...they now share it with me.
475
00:22:36,918 --> 00:22:39,793
And they'd ask me
to protect him
476
00:22:39,876 --> 00:22:43,668
with all the strength
that he uses to protect
others.
477
00:22:48,418 --> 00:22:51,043
Now I guess..
478
00:22:51,873 --> 00:22:53,001
...it's the groom's toast.
479
00:23:00,418 --> 00:23:01,751
I..
480
00:23:02,918 --> 00:23:05,668
...love you...Lois.
481
00:23:09,543 --> 00:23:10,668
I..
482
00:23:15,585 --> 00:23:17,543
And I love you, Clark.
483
00:23:21,460 --> 00:23:23,918
You are the man
I never thought I'd meet.
484
00:23:31,376 --> 00:23:32,335
[knocking on door]
485
00:23:32,418 --> 00:23:35,210
[moaning]
486
00:23:49,210 --> 00:23:50,376
Hmm.
487
00:23:50,460 --> 00:23:51,543
Who brought that?
488
00:23:51,626 --> 00:23:52,835
(Clark)
'I don't know.'
489
00:23:56,918 --> 00:23:59,835
Looks like another...present.
490
00:24:04,335 --> 00:24:07,001
Oh, Lois, take it easy.
They probably just dropped
it.
491
00:24:10,293 --> 00:24:14,626
"Marrying Clark will be
the beginning...of the end."
492
00:24:24,376 --> 00:24:25,460
[footsteps approaching]
493
00:24:25,543 --> 00:24:27,463
- Did you see anybody?
- Nothing.
494
00:24:27,168 --> 00:24:29,043
Whoever brought that
cake
is long gone.
495
00:24:29,873 --> 00:24:31,585
First the flowers
and now this.
496
00:24:31,668 --> 00:24:33,463
What do you hear?
497
00:24:33,168 --> 00:24:34,626
The neighbor's radio.
498
00:24:38,873 --> 00:24:40,585
(female #1 on radio)
'And sources now report
thousands of lives'
499
00:24:40,668 --> 00:24:42,210
'are threatened by
the typhoon smashing'
500
00:24:42,293 --> 00:24:45,168
'into the coast of India.'
501
00:24:45,251 --> 00:24:46,501
Go.
502
00:24:53,251 --> 00:24:56,043
Stay here tonight, Lois.
Don't do anything foolish.
503
00:24:57,585 --> 00:24:58,668
Nothing foolish.
504
00:25:01,835 --> 00:25:03,960
[sighs]
505
00:25:04,043 --> 00:25:05,293
Love you.
506
00:25:05,376 --> 00:25:08,335
[telephone rings]
507
00:25:10,251 --> 00:25:11,543
Hello.
508
00:25:11,626 --> 00:25:13,918
Hi, Jimmy. What's up?
509
00:25:14,001 --> 00:25:16,835
What about Dr. Mamba?
510
00:25:16,918 --> 00:25:18,793
He checked in where?
511
00:25:18,876 --> 00:25:21,710
The Metropolis Diamond Hotel?
Thanks.
512
00:25:23,710 --> 00:25:25,835
Just doing my job.
513
00:25:25,918 --> 00:25:28,293
That's not exactly foolish.
514
00:25:28,376 --> 00:25:31,335
[instrumental music]
515
00:25:47,001 --> 00:25:48,668
[knocking on door]
516
00:25:48,751 --> 00:25:49,876
Who is it?
517
00:25:49,960 --> 00:25:52,463
Lois Lane
from "The Daily Planet."
518
00:25:54,251 --> 00:25:55,960
Excuse me.
519
00:25:56,043 --> 00:25:58,251
Don't you think
it's a little late for
an..
520
00:26:05,001 --> 00:26:06,960
P-please, please come in.
521
00:26:09,793 --> 00:26:11,463
I'd like to ask you
a few questions.
522
00:26:11,168 --> 00:26:12,835
- May I take your coat?
- Oh, no, that's okay.
523
00:26:12,918 --> 00:26:14,835
Well, won't you sit down
here.
Make yourself comfortable.
524
00:26:14,918 --> 00:26:16,460
This looks comfortable.
525
00:26:16,543 --> 00:26:20,168
Oh, well, uh, maybe I can
pour you a glass of champagne.
526
00:26:20,251 --> 00:26:22,710
I-I'd just really like
to ask the questions.
527
00:26:22,793 --> 00:26:24,463
How about dinner for
two,
room service?
528
00:26:24,168 --> 00:26:25,668
Uh, just the questions.
529
00:26:25,751 --> 00:26:27,251
[chuckles]
530
00:26:27,335 --> 00:26:29,251
Just the questions.
531
00:26:29,335 --> 00:26:32,543
Why would someone like you
be interested in
amphibians?
532
00:26:32,626 --> 00:26:34,626
Well, actually,
I'm interested to know
533
00:26:34,710 --> 00:26:36,793
if you have a dark blue
rental car.
534
00:26:36,876 --> 00:26:40,168
License plate number,
M-R-C-7-0-1?
535
00:26:40,251 --> 00:26:42,335
I do have a dark blue car.
536
00:26:42,418 --> 00:26:44,543
I also have three
suits,
two tuxedos
537
00:26:44,626 --> 00:26:48,251
three pairs of trousers,
socks,
shoes, and some undies.
538
00:26:48,335 --> 00:26:52,293
- Would you like to see them?
- Uh, I'll pass.
539
00:26:52,376 --> 00:26:54,793
At 12:13 a.m..
540
00:26:54,876 --> 00:26:56,043
Yes.
541
00:26:56,873 --> 00:26:58,876
Someone robbed
Phil's Exotic Pet Palace.
542
00:26:58,960 --> 00:27:00,876
No.
543
00:27:00,960 --> 00:27:03,626
And they sent you out on
a story like that and pay
you?
544
00:27:03,710 --> 00:27:07,251
Well, the robber was driving
your dark blue rental car.
545
00:27:07,335 --> 00:27:09,751
He was? Well, the valet
service
down below
546
00:27:09,835 --> 00:27:11,418
could give the car to anybody.
547
00:27:11,501 --> 00:27:13,918
Besides, I don't tip very
much,
so you know what it's like.
548
00:27:15,626 --> 00:27:18,918
Well, he looked like he worked
for the secret service.
549
00:27:19,001 --> 00:27:21,210
Hmm. Really?
How
interesting.
550
00:27:21,293 --> 00:27:22,710
Does that ring a bell?
551
00:27:22,793 --> 00:27:25,463
Not even a tinkle.
552
00:27:25,168 --> 00:27:27,751
You know, I've decided
to spend the evening
in.
553
00:27:27,835 --> 00:27:29,793
I thought maybe
you'd like to join
me?
554
00:27:29,876 --> 00:27:31,043
Oh, well, no.
555
00:27:31,873 --> 00:27:32,418
Maybe, listen to
a little music?
556
00:27:32,501 --> 00:27:35,251
No. Thank you...though.
557
00:27:35,335 --> 00:27:37,873
I have to go.
558
00:27:37,210 --> 00:27:38,293
[laughing]
559
00:27:38,376 --> 00:27:40,335
It's okay, it's okay.
560
00:27:40,418 --> 00:27:41,793
You're a very beautiful woman.
561
00:27:41,876 --> 00:27:45,793
Very sweet,
very intelligent.
562
00:27:45,876 --> 00:27:48,501
You do do research
with
doppelbufo frogs
563
00:27:48,585 --> 00:27:50,418
don't you, Dr. Mamba?
564
00:27:50,501 --> 00:27:52,251
What kind of frogs?
565
00:27:52,335 --> 00:27:55,501
- Doppelbufo.
- Doppelbufo.
566
00:27:55,585 --> 00:27:59,793
Well, you're as I said, very
intelligent and very
beautiful.
567
00:27:59,876 --> 00:28:01,210
Your keen sense
should tell you
568
00:28:01,293 --> 00:28:05,873
that this is a hotel suite
and not a research lab.
569
00:28:05,210 --> 00:28:06,793
Unfortunately, I'm off to bed
570
00:28:06,876 --> 00:28:11,293
because it's getting late
and I want to wish you..
571
00:28:11,376 --> 00:28:12,876
...au revoir.
572
00:28:12,960 --> 00:28:14,210
Goodnight.
573
00:28:18,585 --> 00:28:19,668
Did you hear that?
574
00:28:21,043 --> 00:28:22,251
Most of it.
575
00:28:22,335 --> 00:28:24,460
You just had to get those
frogs.
Didn't you, huh?
576
00:28:24,543 --> 00:28:27,626
Do you know how
to spell stupid?
Y-O-U.
577
00:28:27,710 --> 00:28:29,873
Now she's gone.
578
00:28:29,210 --> 00:28:30,460
I want you to follow her.
579
00:28:30,543 --> 00:28:33,001
She gets in a cab,
follow her in the
cab.
580
00:28:33,463 --> 00:28:34,335
See who she talks to.
581
00:28:34,418 --> 00:28:36,793
If it looks like
she's getting close at
all
582
00:28:36,876 --> 00:28:38,418
bring her back here.
583
00:28:39,876 --> 00:28:42,335
Threatening gifts,
weird frogs
584
00:28:42,418 --> 00:28:45,626
my fiancé's typhoon-fighting
in India
585
00:28:45,710 --> 00:28:48,210
it's not even 8 o'clock,
what's next?
586
00:28:48,293 --> 00:28:51,168
Lois, I'm not coming
to your wedding.
587
00:28:51,251 --> 00:28:52,168
What?
588
00:28:52,251 --> 00:28:53,668
Your father says
I'm too controlling
589
00:28:53,751 --> 00:28:55,835
that I'm driving you crazy
and I can't leave things alone
590
00:28:55,918 --> 00:28:57,335
so I am leaving things alone.
591
00:28:57,418 --> 00:28:58,460
Send photos.
592
00:28:58,543 --> 00:28:59,835
You are being unreasonable.
593
00:28:59,918 --> 00:29:02,668
Ah. Unreasonable
and controlling.
594
00:29:02,751 --> 00:29:04,376
I don't know, why no
one
mentioned that before?
595
00:29:04,460 --> 00:29:06,376
Well, I have repeatedly
for years.
596
00:29:06,460 --> 00:29:07,751
And what did I say?
597
00:29:07,835 --> 00:29:10,376
That I shouldn't wear bangs,
that red isn't my color
598
00:29:10,460 --> 00:29:13,418
that I've gained weight,
that I slouch when I stand.
599
00:29:13,501 --> 00:29:15,376
Maybe you weren't listening.
600
00:29:20,463 --> 00:29:22,835
I'm really that difficult?
601
00:29:22,918 --> 00:29:23,876
No wonder you turned
to Martha.
602
00:29:23,960 --> 00:29:26,710
Oh, I do not turn
to Martha.
603
00:29:26,793 --> 00:29:29,626
Lois, I'm unreasonable
and controlling, not
blind.
604
00:29:29,710 --> 00:29:33,710
Well, I'd rather turn to you,
mother. You're my mother.
605
00:29:33,793 --> 00:29:35,626
Face it.
You're not easy.
606
00:29:42,168 --> 00:29:43,335
I know.
607
00:29:46,335 --> 00:29:47,835
Mom..
608
00:29:47,918 --> 00:29:49,960
Clark is the best thing
in my life
609
00:29:50,043 --> 00:29:52,460
and I almost missed him
because I was too busy
610
00:29:52,543 --> 00:29:56,418
controlling my work,
my feelings, everything.
611
00:29:56,501 --> 00:29:59,835
I got lucky.
He made me notice him.
612
00:30:02,668 --> 00:30:06,501
I just wanted your
wedding
to be perfect.
613
00:30:06,585 --> 00:30:09,293
Well, I'm marrying
the man I love.
614
00:30:09,376 --> 00:30:11,168
It is perfect.
615
00:30:11,251 --> 00:30:14,463
Alright. Well, maybe I have
been
a little over concerned
616
00:30:14,168 --> 00:30:16,751
but isn't that's
a mother's job?
617
00:30:16,835 --> 00:30:19,835
If I let that go,
what have I got left?
618
00:30:19,918 --> 00:30:23,043
Everything you had
before and more.
619
00:30:23,873 --> 00:30:25,710
We'll be friends.
620
00:30:25,793 --> 00:30:29,001
And I expect my friends
at my wedding.
621
00:30:31,668 --> 00:30:33,918
You are so manipulative.
622
00:30:34,001 --> 00:30:35,168
Well, I learned from the best.
623
00:30:35,251 --> 00:30:36,543
Oh, I love you.
624
00:30:37,876 --> 00:30:39,543
So, where've you been anyway?
625
00:30:39,626 --> 00:30:42,460
Oh, the story of my life,
a story.
626
00:30:42,543 --> 00:30:44,668
Would you think any of
daddy's old medical friends
627
00:30:44,751 --> 00:30:47,873
would know anything
about a Dr. Mamba?
628
00:30:47,210 --> 00:30:48,918
I don't know.
I suppose
you--
629
00:30:49,001 --> 00:30:50,210
Ask him?
630
00:30:52,873 --> 00:30:53,335
[both gasp]
631
00:30:53,418 --> 00:30:56,293
That would be very low
on the idea meter.
632
00:30:56,376 --> 00:30:59,043
[gunshots]
633
00:31:00,460 --> 00:31:03,873
[grunts]
634
00:31:08,460 --> 00:31:10,873
And people say I'm tough.
635
00:31:10,210 --> 00:31:11,251
Look.
636
00:31:13,418 --> 00:31:16,043
He's not human,
he's..
He's an alien.
637
00:31:16,873 --> 00:31:18,043
Mother, not all aliens are
bad.
Assuming there is--
638
00:31:18,873 --> 00:31:20,168
Of course they're bad. They eat
your brains, I read the papers.
639
00:31:20,251 --> 00:31:23,251
They abduct women for
bizarre sexual
experiments.
640
00:31:23,335 --> 00:31:25,835
- 'Bizarre? Like what?'
- 'Like..'
641
00:31:25,918 --> 00:31:26,876
[screams]
642
00:31:26,960 --> 00:31:28,168
[gunshot]
643
00:31:30,210 --> 00:31:31,293
Neat.
644
00:31:36,501 --> 00:31:39,168
Secret service!
My God, we're going to
prison.
645
00:31:39,251 --> 00:31:41,001
I knew I recognized him.
646
00:31:41,463 --> 00:31:43,251
He was there when we tried
to check in.
647
00:31:47,960 --> 00:31:49,210
'He's a clone.'
648
00:31:49,293 --> 00:31:51,543
Like that's
better
than an alien?
649
00:31:51,626 --> 00:31:55,001
Clark and I are working on a
story about some stolen frogs
650
00:31:55,463 --> 00:31:56,501
frogs that are used
in cloning
651
00:31:56,585 --> 00:31:58,751
and accelerated growth
experiments.
652
00:31:58,835 --> 00:32:01,210
This is one of those frogs.
653
00:32:01,293 --> 00:32:03,918
And he had accelerated healing.
654
00:32:04,001 --> 00:32:07,001
And Dr. Mamba's here in
Metropolis. It all fits.
655
00:32:10,460 --> 00:32:12,543
Lois, we're gonna
pack
our bags right now.
656
00:32:12,626 --> 00:32:14,668
We're gonna get a bus
or a boat or a dog
sledge
657
00:32:14,751 --> 00:32:16,001
and the hell out of Dodge.
658
00:32:16,463 --> 00:32:17,793
Oh, no.
659
00:32:17,876 --> 00:32:21,463
Greentech, Dr. Mamba's
corporation
660
00:32:21,168 --> 00:32:25,376
it's owned by Omni
Agricultural,
a former division of Lexcorp.
661
00:32:25,460 --> 00:32:27,418
- Lex Luthor?
- Yeah.
662
00:32:27,501 --> 00:32:30,876
He experimented with clones
in the past.
663
00:32:30,960 --> 00:32:32,876
And a former division
of Lexcorp built
664
00:32:32,960 --> 00:32:34,376
the Metropolis Diamond Hotel.
665
00:32:34,460 --> 00:32:37,960
He's had this whole thing
wired from the beginning.
666
00:32:38,043 --> 00:32:39,001
Quit it.
667
00:32:42,335 --> 00:32:44,918
Why would Lex clone
a secret service agent?
668
00:32:46,335 --> 00:32:48,585
He's trying to
kill
the President.
669
00:32:48,668 --> 00:32:49,793
[gasp]
670
00:32:52,251 --> 00:32:53,376
Come on.
Be there.
671
00:32:53,460 --> 00:32:54,835
(Martha)
'Hello.'
672
00:32:54,918 --> 00:32:57,418
Hi, Martha. I'm sorry to
wake you. Is Clark there?
673
00:32:57,501 --> 00:33:00,251
Uh, no, honey. He's not here.
I think he's still in India.
674
00:33:00,335 --> 00:33:02,293
Oh, when he gets back
tell him that Lex Luthor
675
00:33:02,376 --> 00:33:04,463
is trying to kill the President.
676
00:33:04,168 --> 00:33:06,668
He's already made a clone
of one secret service
agent
677
00:33:06,751 --> 00:33:08,543
and I'm sure there's more.
678
00:33:08,626 --> 00:33:11,501
Tell him to tell
Superman
if he sees him before I
do.
679
00:33:11,585 --> 00:33:13,960
I'm going to warn
the President.
Bye.
680
00:33:14,043 --> 00:33:17,463
Uh, but Lo..
681
00:33:17,168 --> 00:33:19,835
How will they ever find
a time to have some kids?
682
00:33:19,918 --> 00:33:24,873
I'll call 911 from the car.
If he moves again, shoot
him.
683
00:33:24,210 --> 00:33:26,501
If Clark calls,
tell him
where I've gone.
684
00:33:26,585 --> 00:33:28,751
Oh, if I don't see
you
before the wedding
685
00:33:28,835 --> 00:33:31,835
wear the teal outfit instead
of the rose. It's much nicer.
686
00:33:34,460 --> 00:33:35,418
Come on.
687
00:33:38,873 --> 00:33:40,585
Phase three complete.
688
00:33:40,668 --> 00:33:42,543
Fax this immediately.
689
00:33:45,585 --> 00:33:46,918
Look, I'm telling you
690
00:33:47,001 --> 00:33:48,960
I have got to talk to him
before our deadline.
691
00:33:49,043 --> 00:33:50,793
'I've got to confirm
this quote.'
692
00:33:50,876 --> 00:33:52,168
If I don't get it right
693
00:33:52,251 --> 00:33:53,918
then it'll hurt his chances
for re-election.
694
00:33:54,001 --> 00:33:55,376
And you'll be out of jobs.
695
00:33:55,460 --> 00:33:58,543
- Mr. President!
- Lois, you're up rather
late.
696
00:33:58,626 --> 00:34:00,876
Let her in.
It's an election year.
697
00:34:00,960 --> 00:34:02,043
Yes, sir.
698
00:34:05,876 --> 00:34:09,335
Mr. President, I have reason
to believe that Lex Luthor
699
00:34:09,418 --> 00:34:12,335
is behind an attempt
to assassinate you.
700
00:34:12,418 --> 00:34:14,168
What?
701
00:34:14,251 --> 00:34:16,918
The problem is, I think
the assassin could be
702
00:34:17,001 --> 00:34:18,960
one of your
secret service agents.
703
00:34:19,043 --> 00:34:21,251
Or at least a clone
of one of them.
704
00:34:21,335 --> 00:34:23,463
One already tried
to kidnap me tonight.
705
00:34:23,168 --> 00:34:27,001
A clone? Lois, I must say,
this is fantastic.
706
00:34:27,463 --> 00:34:30,585
It's mind-boggling.
Do you have any proof?
707
00:34:30,668 --> 00:34:33,460
Yes, by now the police
should have in custody
708
00:34:33,543 --> 00:34:35,668
the clone that tried
to kidnap me.
709
00:34:35,751 --> 00:34:38,335
You could examine him.
710
00:34:38,418 --> 00:34:41,960
Lois, I insist
you have dinner with me.
711
00:34:44,168 --> 00:34:46,501
Handy things,
these secret passages.
712
00:34:46,585 --> 00:34:49,710
'Mr. Luthor certainly
was farsighted enough'
713
00:34:49,793 --> 00:34:51,335
to have installed them.
714
00:34:51,418 --> 00:34:52,876
You know, you had
everything right about
715
00:34:52,960 --> 00:34:57,418
this whole clone business
except one thing
716
00:34:58,501 --> 00:35:00,043
the assassination attempt.
717
00:35:00,873 --> 00:35:01,376
'We didn't have to.'
718
00:35:01,460 --> 00:35:04,251
We already got
to the President.
719
00:35:04,335 --> 00:35:05,793
He's a clone, too.
720
00:35:07,918 --> 00:35:09,626
No.
721
00:35:09,710 --> 00:35:11,335
Pretty cool, huh?
722
00:35:11,418 --> 00:35:12,876
[gasps]
723
00:35:12,960 --> 00:35:14,710
[screams]
724
00:35:14,793 --> 00:35:15,793
[gunshot]
725
00:35:20,793 --> 00:35:22,876
Superman!
726
00:35:22,960 --> 00:35:25,251
Get the President!
He's a fake! He's a clone!
727
00:35:25,335 --> 00:35:28,835
Lois, please. What next?
I started as a frog?
728
00:35:28,918 --> 00:35:30,876
- She's telling the--
- Stop him!
729
00:35:33,751 --> 00:35:34,876
[grunts]
730
00:35:36,001 --> 00:35:38,463
Wait, I can prove it!
731
00:35:38,168 --> 00:35:40,168
We don't have to get
violent about this.
732
00:35:40,251 --> 00:35:42,335
[grunts]
733
00:35:42,418 --> 00:35:44,626
Lois, I sure hope you know
what you're doing.
734
00:35:44,710 --> 00:35:47,585
Look at his lip.
Does that look human to
you?
735
00:35:50,335 --> 00:35:52,835
You can't even
bleed properly.
736
00:35:58,835 --> 00:36:00,626
[grunting]
737
00:36:02,210 --> 00:36:04,463
Gentlemen, I think
you'll find the President
738
00:36:04,168 --> 00:36:06,001
waiting downstairs.
739
00:36:06,463 --> 00:36:07,668
(male #4)
'Come on, you.'
740
00:36:10,876 --> 00:36:15,293
Miss Lane, I believe you have
a wedding to prepare for.
741
00:36:15,376 --> 00:36:17,710
That's right.
I almost forgot.
742
00:36:19,835 --> 00:36:22,873
You know, Lois being late,
that's a rule of nature
743
00:36:22,210 --> 00:36:23,876
but the Reverend Bob?
744
00:36:23,960 --> 00:36:25,626
Where the Sam Hill is he?
745
00:36:25,710 --> 00:36:27,210
Probably
practicing
his routine.
746
00:36:27,293 --> 00:36:29,376
Don't even say that.
747
00:36:40,460 --> 00:36:41,668
[grunts]
748
00:36:43,668 --> 00:36:45,873
- Lois.
- Clark, go away.
749
00:36:45,210 --> 00:36:47,043
It's bad luck to see the
bride
before the wedding.
750
00:36:47,873 --> 00:36:49,293
Lois, come on. That's just
an old superstition.
751
00:36:49,376 --> 00:36:51,501
Maybe it's not.
Maybe it's based on
truth.
752
00:36:51,585 --> 00:36:53,335
Look at all the bad things
that have happened to us.
753
00:36:53,418 --> 00:36:55,001
- Why risk it?
- Lois.
754
00:36:55,463 --> 00:36:59,543
Lois, I promise. Nothing is
gonna happen, okay?
755
00:36:59,626 --> 00:37:01,626
Mrs. Lane, I have a
message
from your daughter, Lucy.
756
00:37:01,710 --> 00:37:04,585
Oh, she's at the
airport?
My God, we got to
wait.
757
00:37:04,668 --> 00:37:07,001
- Just my luck.
- Well, not exactly.
758
00:37:07,463 --> 00:37:08,543
See? What happened?
759
00:37:08,626 --> 00:37:10,751
'Well, apparently, she was
running late for her plane'
760
00:37:10,835 --> 00:37:13,918
and set off the metal
detector
when she went through.
761
00:37:14,001 --> 00:37:16,293
I guess, she got a bit
frustrated at the delay..
762
00:37:16,376 --> 00:37:17,710
Oh, here it comes.
763
00:37:17,793 --> 00:37:19,873
She slugged a security guard,
and she's in jail.
764
00:37:19,210 --> 00:37:21,460
And they won't hear
bail till Monday.
765
00:37:21,543 --> 00:37:23,460
Your sister will be
the death of me yet.
766
00:37:26,210 --> 00:37:27,835
[clears throat]
767
00:37:27,918 --> 00:37:29,463
So, uh..
768
00:37:30,960 --> 00:37:32,668
Cindy..
769
00:37:32,751 --> 00:37:34,293
I would..
770
00:37:34,376 --> 00:37:35,501
...be honored--
771
00:37:35,585 --> 00:37:37,293
Yes.
772
00:37:37,376 --> 00:37:41,710
Uh, I'm afraid I have
one other bit of bad news.
773
00:37:41,793 --> 00:37:42,960
Reverend Bob can't make it.
774
00:37:43,043 --> 00:37:44,543
Are you kidding me?
775
00:37:44,626 --> 00:37:48,873
He got a gig on a cruise ship
that sailed this morning.
776
00:37:48,210 --> 00:37:49,835
But he's trying to
find a replacement.
777
00:37:49,918 --> 00:37:52,793
He called me ship-to-shore
just a few minutes ago.
778
00:37:52,876 --> 00:37:55,793
Well, I knew it.
I knew it. I knew
it.
779
00:37:55,876 --> 00:37:59,210
You know, Lex Luthor
probably
owns the cruise line, too.
780
00:37:59,293 --> 00:38:02,710
Lois, honey, we're going
to sort this out, okay.
781
00:38:02,793 --> 00:38:06,710
Lex.
Why didn't I think of
this?
782
00:38:06,793 --> 00:38:10,376
He's probably the one that
sent me all those creepy
gifts.
783
00:38:10,460 --> 00:38:12,418
It's making him crazy
that I'm marrying you.
784
00:38:12,501 --> 00:38:14,210
See, I knew something
bad
was gonna happen
785
00:38:14,293 --> 00:38:15,668
and it is
happening
in space.
786
00:38:15,751 --> 00:38:18,668
Look, Lois, it's over, okay?
787
00:38:18,751 --> 00:38:20,460
Lex is in prison
where he's gonna be
788
00:38:20,543 --> 00:38:23,751
for the next 983 years.
789
00:38:23,835 --> 00:38:28,251
Okay? The only thing we have to
do today...is get married.
790
00:38:30,668 --> 00:38:34,210
Now, come on,
let's get you dressed.
791
00:38:34,293 --> 00:38:36,168
And I'll find a minister.
792
00:38:36,251 --> 00:38:37,251
[clearing throat]
793
00:38:37,335 --> 00:38:40,960
Uh...normally, I, uh..
794
00:38:41,043 --> 00:38:43,793
...wouldn't reveal this
795
00:38:43,876 --> 00:38:45,793
but...I can marry you.
796
00:38:46,793 --> 00:38:48,463
(Jimmy)
'No way.'
797
00:38:48,168 --> 00:38:49,876
I am an ordained minister
798
00:38:49,960 --> 00:38:52,251
of the first church
of Blue Suede Deliverance.
799
00:38:52,335 --> 00:38:54,751
This is no time for bad jokes.
800
00:38:54,835 --> 00:38:57,168
Reverend Bob was enough
for a lifetime.
801
00:38:57,251 --> 00:39:00,168
Ma'am, this is no joke.
802
00:39:00,251 --> 00:39:02,960
Alice and I were down
at Graceland, one time
803
00:39:03,043 --> 00:39:06,626
celebrating and I saw this
on the inside of a matchbook
804
00:39:06,710 --> 00:39:08,876
at this little motel
we were staying at.
805
00:39:08,960 --> 00:39:11,168
And well,
the rest is history.
806
00:39:12,460 --> 00:39:13,501
Perry, we'd be honored.
807
00:39:13,585 --> 00:39:16,293
Great! I've been
to enough weddings
808
00:39:16,376 --> 00:39:18,751
Well, I know exactly
what to say..
809
00:39:18,835 --> 00:39:21,460
Sort of, you know...
more or less.
810
00:39:21,543 --> 00:39:24,293
Well, I'll just wing it.
811
00:39:24,376 --> 00:39:25,918
Okay.
812
00:39:26,001 --> 00:39:28,463
(Perry)
'Ha-ha-ha!
Come on, Jimmy.'
813
00:39:31,960 --> 00:39:33,626
Thank you, Clark.
814
00:39:35,043 --> 00:39:36,460
Uh, Miss Lane?
815
00:39:36,543 --> 00:39:38,168
I need you to sign
the wedding license.
816
00:39:38,251 --> 00:39:41,585
- It'll take a minute.
- I already signed.
817
00:39:41,668 --> 00:39:44,463
Teacher's pet. Take this.
818
00:39:49,463 --> 00:39:51,418
[instrumental music]
819
00:39:52,918 --> 00:39:55,501
I haven't straightened your
tie
since you were a little boy.
820
00:39:57,418 --> 00:39:59,751
- Oh.
- I love you.
821
00:40:06,626 --> 00:40:09,418
[organ music]
822
00:40:42,585 --> 00:40:44,710
(Perry)
Please be seated.
823
00:40:53,168 --> 00:40:54,585
Friends..
824
00:40:54,668 --> 00:40:57,876
...we're gathered here today
to join this man
825
00:40:57,960 --> 00:41:01,873
and this woman
in holy matrimony.
826
00:41:01,210 --> 00:41:03,210
Marriage, um..
827
00:41:03,293 --> 00:41:05,210
Well, it's a lot
like a newspaper.
828
00:41:05,293 --> 00:41:07,626
Takes a lot of hard work
to make it a success.
829
00:41:07,710 --> 00:41:10,251
But if anybody can do it,
you two can.
830
00:41:11,501 --> 00:41:13,210
Jimmy, the ring.
831
00:41:17,460 --> 00:41:19,751
Now...repeat after me.
832
00:41:19,835 --> 00:41:22,918
I, Clark, take thee, Lois
833
00:41:23,001 --> 00:41:25,585
to love, honor and cherish
834
00:41:25,668 --> 00:41:27,463
for as long as I live.
835
00:41:27,168 --> 00:41:29,873
I, Clark..
836
00:41:29,210 --> 00:41:31,873
...take thee, Lois
837
00:41:31,210 --> 00:41:33,876
to love, honor
838
00:41:33,960 --> 00:41:36,463
and cherish
839
00:41:36,168 --> 00:41:38,168
for as long as I live.
840
00:41:51,293 --> 00:41:52,960
(Perry)
Now repeat after me.
841
00:41:53,043 --> 00:41:54,543
I, Lois..
842
00:41:54,626 --> 00:41:56,251
'...take thee, Clark'
843
00:41:56,335 --> 00:41:58,710
to love, honor and cherish
844
00:41:58,793 --> 00:42:00,793
for as long as I live.
845
00:42:00,876 --> 00:42:02,876
I, Lois..
846
00:42:02,960 --> 00:42:04,918
...take thee, Clark
847
00:42:05,001 --> 00:42:07,960
to love, honor and cherish
848
00:42:08,043 --> 00:42:10,873
for as long as I live.
849
00:42:23,626 --> 00:42:27,710
Now, by the power vested
in me by this state
850
00:42:27,793 --> 00:42:30,668
and the first church
of Blue Suede Deliverance
851
00:42:30,751 --> 00:42:33,585
I pronounce you
husband and wife.
852
00:42:33,668 --> 00:42:35,543
You may kiss the bride.
853
00:42:40,501 --> 00:42:43,460
[all applauding]
854
00:42:57,668 --> 00:43:00,626
[crowd cheering]
855
00:43:05,251 --> 00:43:07,376
(male #5 on TV)
'This is L.N.N.'
856
00:43:07,460 --> 00:43:09,626
'L.N.N has just learned
that prison authorities'
857
00:43:09,710 --> 00:43:11,210
'released Lex Luthor
this morning'
858
00:43:11,293 --> 00:43:13,418
'after they received a
Presidential pardon for him.'
859
00:43:13,501 --> 00:43:15,873
'Prison officials
were unaware at the time'
860
00:43:15,210 --> 00:43:17,543
'that the pardon had been
issued
by the false President.'
861
00:43:17,626 --> 00:43:18,876
'A search
was immediately begun'
862
00:43:18,960 --> 00:43:21,001
'but so far Mr. Luthor
remains at large.'
863
00:43:28,873 --> 00:43:31,463
[all applauding]
864
00:43:43,873 --> 00:43:44,710
(female #2)
Lois, don't forget
to throw the bouquet.
865
00:43:44,793 --> 00:43:46,210
(female #3)
The bouquet. Here.
866
00:43:46,293 --> 00:43:47,668
(Clark)
Here it comes!
867
00:44:03,001 --> 00:44:04,210
[indistinct chatter]
868
00:44:06,501 --> 00:44:07,710
[cork popping]
869
00:44:15,293 --> 00:44:18,543
Just think, this time
tomorrow,
we'll be in Hawaii.
870
00:44:19,668 --> 00:44:21,960
(Lois)
'Maybe we can just stay
there.'
871
00:44:22,043 --> 00:44:24,835
(Clark)
'You want it, you got it.'
872
00:44:25,876 --> 00:44:29,168
We'll eat coconuts every day.
873
00:44:29,251 --> 00:44:33,001
'I'll just go up and grab
some
whenever we need more.'
874
00:44:33,463 --> 00:44:34,835
Sounds great.
875
00:44:56,918 --> 00:44:58,251
Lois?
876
00:45:00,873 --> 00:45:01,793
Is everything alright?
877
00:45:06,876 --> 00:45:09,210
Stand by to be stunned.
878
00:45:11,751 --> 00:45:14,751
[dramatic music]
879
00:45:25,626 --> 00:45:28,585
[theme music]