Uh, yeah, look, Harlan, it's not me.
It's my wife Alice.
Perry, Alice is a woman.
Safety, security, three percent,
FDIC insured..
[chuckles] ...it's how they think.
Yeah, I know that.
You've seen how much I've made for the other members.
And you did okay with that little investment
we tested the waters with.
Listen, I did more than okay.
'I just wanna know that we're talking'
a minimum downside here.
Harlan, you've got a sizable chunk of my life savings.
It's only natural to have these kinds of fears
but, Perry, I'm telling you.
This is a brand new way
to manufacture microchips for pennies.
[floor creaks]
And unlike the typical Silicon Valley venture
all our basic managerials are farmed out
to low cost specialization services
so the pension alone will save us 45 cents per chip.
[grunts]
To get us into mass production fast we need equipment.
Now, we found an overseas company that's gone belly up
willing to sell its hardware
but they'll only deal in cash or bonds.
Wait a minute.
Are you telling me all my money
is sitting there in bearer bonds, good as cash?
Relax. Perry, this is not my first rodeo.
'I've got an armed guard on the way.'
Once in transit, it's all fully insured and..
[knock on door]
Well, there he is now.
Mmm! Nothing like a Single malt Scotch, huh?
Oh.
Hmm.
Ooh!
Whoa!
What the hell?
Ahh.
Ohh.
Ahh.
[electricity crackles]
(Perry) 'You alright, Harlan?'
Uh-huh.
Why you're a little late, pal.
'That safe is locked and secured.'
'There's not a chance you're gonna get'
'anything out of there.'
[explosion]
Oh, my God.
[intense music]
[grunts]
Harlan, this is bad, isn't it?
Uh-huh.
Oh, no.
[theme music]
So this hooded figure now
did you get a good look at his face?
He was wearing a hood.
Oh, right. Yeah, a hood.
- Is this decaf? - What?
Yeah, 'cause I just can't take all that caffeine anymore.
It used to be I could drink three, four cups every morning.
Look, excuse me, do you mind if we get back to my robbery?
Yeah. Sorry.
Alright, now, see the way he stunned me
well, I never felt anything like that before.
A-are these non-fat? I'm trying to cut down.
Will somebody get this man some non-fat muffins?
Thank you.
Looks like post traumatic stress is setting in.
Can you blame him?
I mean, he has no idea if he'll ever
see his life savings again.
Listen. Listen. Can you do me a favor?
Would you go in there with me?
He yells less when you're around.
Boy, if I get less, I'd hate to see more.
(Perry) 'Olsen! Muffins!'
Yes, you would.
Realistically, Mr. White, this is a big city.
There's a robbery that happens every 10 minutes.
My advice is, uh
don't hold your breath.
That's it?
What kinda bonds were they again?
Bearer bonds.
Futures, chief. That's the way to go.
Isn't that risky?
Yeah, it can be but the returns are huge.
I made 15 thou last week.
(Perry) 'Whoa.'
You made 15,000 dollars last week on futures
and we've been paying for your parking?
It's not real.
Oh.
I do it on my computer. It's my hobby.
My brother put me into five percent triple tax frees.
- How'd he know what you needed? - He asked.
[laughter]
Okay, see you.
Uh, uh, you'll be in touch?
About what?
Oh, right. Uh, yeah, sure.
Judas Priest.
Oh, boy.
Well...I'm done for, kids.
'Those bonds were as good as cash.'
'They're gone. They're not insured.'
I suck up enough courage to tell Alice
she's gonna boot me out the door
faster than you can say YMCA.
Well, don't start packing yet, chief.
Clark and I can try and find this guy.
[telephone rings]
Well, I can't ask you to do that for me.
- Why? - 'Daily Planet.'
Well, because it would be using Planet employees
to help me solve my own personal problems.
I don't see how can I do that?
Chief, it's your wife.
Go.
'Alice.'
How you doing, honey?
(Charles) 'Alright, that's fine, Mr. Mallory.'
You can go on up now.'
(Mallroy) 'Thank you, Charles.'
Hi, I'm Clark Kent, this is Lois Lane.
'and we're from the Daily Planet.'
I believe that Perry White called and said we're coming.
Let's see.
Oh, yes, here you are, Mr. Kent, you can go up.
- Thank you. - I'm sorry, ma'am.
You're gonna have to wait here.
What?
Well, it's a gentlemen's club.
Well, I'm a reporter on a story. Excuse me.
I'm-I'm sorry, ma'am.
Will you let go of my arm, please?
Will you get off the step, please?
Yes, I'm a female.
It's probably been few years since you've seen one.
Lois, this guy's just trying to do his job.
- Why don't I go upstairs-- - Clark, are we partners or not?
If you go in there without me
it's as if you're saying there is nothing wrong
with this kind of discrimination.
Okay. Fine. Fine. What do you want us to do?
Well, We don't have to go in there.
We can get the police report.
That'll tell us everything.
Okay.
Typical.
Excuse me?
Lois, he's just trying to provoke you.
Are you implying something?
And he's obviously doing a great job.
That women are volatile and unstable?
Prone to emotional outbursts?
Well, Let me tell you something.
At least we don't form organizations
the sole purpose of which
is to hide from the opposite sex.
I'm gonna go get a hot dog.
[clears throat]
Some guy in a Halloween suit
sneaks into my club
busts into my safe
and trick or treat
steals my money.
Our people are out in force.
We should have a lead by..
Superman.
I heard about the robbery.
I thought I might look around.
Well, the police have already been over the place
but of course your help would be more than welcome.
[whooshing]
Have you ever thought of joining a men's club, Superman?
It might be nice for you to have a place to relax
take your cape off, just be one of the guys.
Thanks, but I don't really have the time.
We have a full gym.
What is this?
What?
[zapping]
You mind if I take this with me and see what I can find out?
Be my guest.
And if you change your mind about the club..
Maybe the news hasn't penetrated these thick walls
but you know, women actually have the vote now.
You are blocking the entrance
and you're creating a nuisance.
A nuisance? I'm a nuisance?
Well, you know I could be picketing this place. I could--
- Fine. - Lois, look at this.
I'm not finished with you yet.
Fine.
I got this off a guard that I bribed inside.
He said that they found this design
etched onto the side of the safe.
What is it?
See the dragon symbol? Yin yang? They're power totems.
Some of the more obscure Chinese Martial Arts use them.
The design is cut into an artifact
like a necklace or a ring..
It's supposed to bestow power upon its wearer.
If it's obscure, how do you know about it?
I traveled to China a little bit.
I mean, I know some of them, but not all of em'.
I don't recognize this one at all.
But hey, I know who would. Chen Chow.
- Who? - Chen Chow.
He's a friend of mine.
He's the editor of the "Chinatown Daily."
His grandfather and sister Lin are really big into this stuff.
- Whoops. - What?
My folks are coming into town.
I've to let them into my apartment.
You go ahead.
You sure?
Yeah.
Where'd you say this guy Chen lived?
The heart of the dragon?
What's that, some kind of Bruce Lee movie?
It's no joke.
You saw what he did to the safe.
He's a 10th level Ye Chi master
and with a dragon's heart bracelet
he's unstoppable.
Excuse me.
Did I just fall through a rabbit hole?
I want this yahoo found.
And then I want him hurt.
And then I want to dance at his funeral.
Are you reading me on this?
Yes, but I don't think you're reading me.
Hyah! Hyah!
[speaking in foreign language]
[door bell jingles]
Hi. I'm Lois Lane.
Uh, Clark Kent called.
I have an appointment with Chen Chow.
[grunting]
[speaking in foreign language]
Hi. You must be Lois. I'm Chen.
Nice to finally meet you. I've heard a lot about you.
So, I hear the hooded figure strikes again.
Yeah. Clark said you'd heard about this guy.
He's hit four Chinatown businesses in the last week
but this is his first robbery outside Chinatown.
Same MO. Alone, big cash, no clues.
Actually, one clue. Um..
We found this. We were wondering if you know what it means.
Hmm.
I don't know.
Hey, grandpa.
You recognize this?
This one is
heart and head are in different places.
It's a good thing, if my heart was in my head
I wouldn't have room for my brain.
It is the dragon's heart, the Long Sum.
'Power totem of the Ye Chi discipline.'
Two bracelets worn on the wrists
taken from the Dao Monastery many years ago.
Where are they now?
Only the one who took them knows.
Um, well, Chen
if you could get me a list of the robberies
that took place in Chinatown and the dates.
(Chen) 'I'll fax it to your office.'
Thanks. How do you know Clark?
We go to the same optometrist.
Ah-ha.
[speaking in foreign language]
Excuse me.
Uh, it was a pleasure to meet you, sir.
I just wanted to say
that I've studied a little karate and Tai Chi
and I was watching you with your students.
I'd really be interested in maybe taking--
Women are not allowed in the master class.
Huh.
[instrumental music]
Clark, I'm sorry the plane was so late.
Next time, maybe we'll just have you fly us in.
[chuckles] Well, you'd certainly be
a lot gentler with our luggage.
What a day this has been. What a rare mood I'm in.
Oh, hi, Lois. How are you?
You look a little tense.
We're investigating this story
at the Metropolis Men's Club.
When Clark and I get there, they won't let me in.
Why ever not?
Because I'm a woman.
And at your friend Chen's, I find out I can't take
a Ye Chi class because I'm a woman.
Oh, that's awful.
Yeah. Still, you can understand why it's like that.
(Clark) 'Uh, dad.'
Hmm? No, I'm talking about the men's club part.
Because, after a hard day
a man likes time alone with his buddies.
A hard day?
So you're saying that men endure
intrinsically harder days than women?
Well, now, Lois..
Tell her what I mean, Martha.
No, Jonathan, you tell me.
What are you saying?
What I'm saying is men work.
And women work...of course.
Uh...and, uh..
Clark, help me out, huh?
I know nothing.
[telephone rings]
Excuse me.
Hello?
So you'd be willing to switch jobs
with me then say, for the next three days
that we're here in Metropolis?
Okay, for the next three days
I'll do your chores, you do mine.
- Mm-hm. - Deal?
Deal.
- My to do list. - Mm-hmm.
Okay.
Ah. Okay.
Number one, shop for dinner.
Okay. I'm off to work.
I guess I should start getting busy
doing Jonathan's chores.
Ahh.
Great. Thanks. That was Jimmy.
He got your fax from Chen. Did a little background check.
Turns out that all four of the Chinatown factories
that were robbed by the hooded figure
are subsidiaries of the same Chinatown company
Son Kwan Industries.
[horn honking]
So, we'd like to talk to someone here
at Son Kwan Industries about the robberies.
We understand you've been hit a lot...recently.
It's just not your day with doormen.
[sighs]
And in exchange for your passage here
you've agreed to work in our factories
live in our housings and set aside 50 percent of your wages
until the debt is repaid.
The boy, we were hoping he would go to school.
Oh, he will as soon as soon as he's worked off his debt.
But-but--
If you don't wanna work here
there's no problem sending you back.
There's still half a day left.
Go see the foreman and he'll get you on the line.
We just brought in another family.
We need 50 more.
A hundred.
Every day.
I could bring in thousands.
If only Superman didn't patrol the harbors.
Yeah, yeah.
Angels, pinheads.
Welcome to the wonderful world of if.
Tell me you've got good news about these robberies.
I do.
The Dragon's Heart bracelets
were brought here from China
by a family that's known to us.
- The bracelets-- - Bracelets again.
What, are you working up a drag act?
I don't care about bracelets.
You're into women's accessories? Fine.
Shop on your own time.
But find this guy that's taken my money.
[grunting]
Give me the gun.
[cheering]
Go! Around the corner!
[tires squealing]
Look! It's-it's the hooded..
Drop the bags and come with me.
Hey, I think your bracelet guy's about to have
his butt handed to him
faster than a speeding bullet.
That's great.
[screams]
Superman, are you alright?
I'm fine. Just a little mad.
But I'll be better as soon as this guy's in..
Jail.
You were saying something about women's accessories?
He can beat Superman.
Wearing the heart of the dragon
a Ye Chi master could kill Superman.
A dead Superman.
You know what that is?
Good for business.
Nobody flying over the harbor
with X-ray vision.
We could fill factories by the boatloads.
Welcome to that world of if.
Get him.
I don't care what it costs or who dies.
I want those bracelets.
Let's go!
Are you sure it wasn't kryptonite?
I'm sure, dad.
Do you suppose could he be some kind of super being?
Well, he wasn't strong. He was just..
I don't understand what he really was at all.
Light bulb.
Your job.
Right.
Clark, where do you keep the light bulbs?
I don't know, dad. Mom bought the last box.
They're in the storage space under the window in the bedroom.
- Dad? - 'Mm-hmm?'
What happened to this shirt?
(Jonathan) 'What do you mean?'
It was white.
I just washed it. It should be clean.
Well, it is clean, dad. Only, now it's pink.
You didn't wash this with my cape, did you?
Can't you fix it with your heat vision or something?
Dad, there's not a superpower on Earth that can get this out.
Speaking of heat vision
do you smell something burning?
Dad, my cape.
Ah-ha-ha.
I got it!
'Oh, it bugged me all night'
then I finally figured it out.
Hey, nice shirt.
You look good in pink.
(Clark) 'Thanks, Lois. Come on in.'
(Lois) 'So, the moves that the hooded figure was using'
'I recognize them, they're the exact moves'
that Chen's grandfather taught. The Ye Chi.
[chuckles]
[intense music]
- Let's get outta here. - Alright.
- Oh, no. - Chen?
Lois, I think I hear something.
Chen, what happened?
Four guys broke in, tore the place up.
Who were they?
The Tong.
The Chinese mafia?
What did they want?
They think we have the dragon heart bracelets
grandpa was talking about.
(Lois) 'That's part of the reason we're here.'
The hooded robber hit Son Kwan Industries.
Lois saw him using the same Ye Chi moves that you taught
and he was wearing the bracelets.
He threw Superman around like a rag doll
and then disappeared.
I wouldn't say like a rag doll.
A Ye Chi master utilizes many devices
a smoke that paralyzes.
A sound that confuses.
A...a dust that can create an image so real
that even another Ye Chi master
would be fooled.
And the Dragon Heart's bracelet?
Your chi is strong.
Very, very strong.
Yes, I trust you.
I have the bracelets.
Grandpa, for real?
[speaking in foreign language]
When my grandfather died
he gave them to me to hold for the next worthy one.
I thought it would be my student Jzuk Mao
but he was seduced by evil and greed.
The last thing I did before leaving China
with my grandchildren for America
was to have him arrested.
What's so amazing about the bracelets?
I will show you.
Like so many
the Tong search without seeing.
Ay-ya!
'It's gone!'
Someone has stolen them.
They were here yesterday.
I checked on it
after you left, Ms. Lane.
(Liu) 'Chen!'
Mr. Liu, where'd you get this?
The hooded man left it with us.
'Now I can pay back the factory.'
'My boy can go to school.'
Please, Chen, you understand these things.
You can make arrangements to pay back these men
so they don't bother me again?
Don't worry.
I think I know who to talk to, to straighten this out
Thank you.
Where do they work?
Son Kwan.
And suddenly there's a thief
hitting Son Kwan Industries.
And handing out donations.
'Maybe we should go at this from another angle.'
Maybe we should be looking at who's behind Son Kwan
and how that's connected to Perry.
I can tell you who everybody whispers about
but there's never been any proof.
Indentured workers?
Sounds like something out of the middle ages.
Kind of like a men's club.
Well, what has this gotta do with Harlan and my club?
The buzz in Chinatown
is that Harlan Black is Son Kwan Industries.
Good Lord.
You know, he told me he'd found a way to cut production costs.
'He didn't say indentured labor was a part of it.'
If an investment sounds too good to be true, it usually is.
I'm just quoting "The Wall Street" journal.
And as far as the hooded robber, was concerned, chief
'your money was as dirty as Harlan's.'
And if we're gonna get your money back, we've gotta find him
and convince him that you were just an innocent dupe.
No offense.
No, no, Lois, I deserve that one.
You know, I was wondering
what if Chen is the hooded robber?
A mild-mannered reporter
really a superhero?
Clark, please.
[laughing]
[grunts]
Chen, do I look like a nine year old?
No.
Then why are you telling me fairy tales?
You stole this from me.
I told you.
I just wanted to help the Liu's.
What, you think I never read "Zorro?"
There's only one reason you're not dead.
You have something I want.
Now, where are the bracelets?
I don't know.
Kid, you can either tell me, or..
You can tell Jzuk Mao.
Recognize the name?
'Your grandfather practically raised him.'
His star pupil, I'm told.
Tenth-level Chi master.
Whatever that is.
This is a mistake, uh..
I'm not the guy who's been robbing you.
Well, either you are and there's gonna be
one heck of a fight, or I'm totally wrong
in which case
you're one dead nerd.
I swear.
I'm not the guy.
'I'm not.'
Really.
(Clark) Uh, okay even if Chen isn't the robber
he can put the word out on the street that we wanna talk to him
and straighten everything out.
We should be digging deeper into Son Kwan
trying to get some hard connection to Black.
This is a waste of time.
Lois, we flipped a coin. You lost.
Let me see the quarter again.
Guess we keep looking.
Make it look like an accident.
[speaking in foreign language]
[grunting]
(Chen) Help!
Ahh!
[instrumental music]
(Chen) 'No.'
Oh, no. No!
Help!
[laughing]
[screams]
It's alright.
You're gonna be okay.
Alright, people. Let's brainstorm.
Uh, Lois!
I got it, chief. How about we--
Look, you think you can rustle us up some coffee?
Black, with sugar.
Cream.
Cream, four sugars.
Hold on a second. Why should I get the coffee?
- I got it last time. - And you're already up.
Oh, boy, women.
What? What'd you say?
He said, women.
As in..
As in women.
You know, like table, chair, lamp.
It's a word, Lois, like coffee.
She sure is sensitive today.
(Jimmy) 'That's how they get sometimes, huh?'
(Perry) 'Yeah, but God love 'em, huh?'
[laughter]
Easy on the eyes, hard on the ears.
Oh, yeah.
[laughter]
Lois! Coffee! We need coffee!
So go get us some coffee!
'Coffee! Coffee! Coffee! Coffee!'
'Coffee! Coffee!'
Lois, how about some coffee? Lois, coffee?
[gasps] Get your own damn coffee!
What..
Coffee.
Oh.
- Thanks. - Sure.
I just got off the phone with the hospital.
Chen is gonna be fine.
What about his family?
(Clark) I can't get them on the phone.
And none of the neighbors haven't seen him.
Well, they're probably out looking
for those dragon whatever's.
The hearts.
(Jonathan) 'Clark?'
Dad, what are you doing here?
Oh, I was wondering if I could leave these packages here
while I finish shopping.
Sure.
Thanks.
[sighs]
Hi, Lois.
You look a little pooped.
Ah, Martha always spends a day while we're in Metropolis
stocking up on linens, kitchenware
'stuff like that for the house.'
So, what's mom doing?
Well, so far, she's beaten herself at checkers
twelve times in a row.
Oh.
Alice is taking this a whole lot better than I thought.
Well, I mean
she's basically barred me
from any and all fiduciary responsibility
but that's probably a good thing.
You know, I, I'm real good at making money.
But holding on to it..
Well, it slips right through my fingers like water.
There's no real trick to it, chief.
It's just a little common sense
and a little research
but anybody can have bad luck.
I mean, whew, I took a bath
on that phone stock deal last year.
Lost $80,000 like that.
Well, did you make it back?
Are you kidding?
I got a tip from a buddy, right?
Took my cushion fund, put it into minerals.
Tripled what I would've made on the phone deal.
If only it was real money.
[chuckles]
Anyway gotta go, lots to do.
[chuckles] Alright. Bye, dad.
Oh, I almost forgot.
Martha wants to throw a party on Friday.
Nothing fancy.
And we'd like you to come, Lois.
You cooking?
I am.
Wouldn't miss it.
Okay, kids. What's our status?
We're run into a dead end trying to figure who that robber is.
It's gotta be somebody who's a Ye Chi master.
I don't think it's the grandfather.
(Lois) 'Unless that hobbling with the cane is an act.'
Okay, but we know it's not Chen.
Getting thrown off that building was no act.
We've been running checks on all the grandfather's students
but that could take forever.
So we think our next option is to go after Harlan.
Yeah, but, but how's that gonna stop the robber?
If we can help put Harlan away
then we might've some leverage
to convince the robber to return your money.
(Clark) 'If we ever figure out who he is.'
The problem is from all public records
Harlan's attachment to Son Kwan Industries is nonexistent.
Well. Well, we're gonna need some hard evidence.
I doubt there'd be much at his factories
or any of his other businesses.
What about his home?
- Or the club. - The club.
You know, he does an awful lot of business down there
including trying to raise money from members like me.
'I bet there's more than a little something'
'in those computer files.'
Chief, do you think you'd get me inside?
Well, yeah.
That's no problem.
We'll just act like you're a prospective member.
I'll show you around and when the coast is clear
I'll duck into Harlan's office.
Chief, maybe I should do the ducking.
Excuse me. Lois Lane here. Remember me?
Award-winning investigative reporter
emphasis on investigative
specializing in covert break-ins.
Lois, you may not go on this mission.
Well, what am I supposed to do?
Sit here knitting, waiting for the hunter-gatherers to return?
Clark, explain it to her, will you?
Chief, have you ever heard the expression
"Pulling a Schultz?"
Ah! "Hogan's heroes."
'"I know nothing."'
(Clark) '"I see nothing."'
(Perry) '"I hear nothing."'
Yeah, so we got the pool
gym, billiard room
squash courts, racquetball courts
and right in there, the President's office.
Chief, you should let me do this one.
Alright, no look, Clark, I know you're some kind of
hotshot but believe me, son.
- I invented the word hotshot. - I understand that, chief.
- Hey, Donovan. - 'Oh, hi, Perry.'
Listen, I want you to meet Clark Kent.
He's thinking about becoming a member.
(Donovan) 'Pleasure to meet you.'
You think you could take him over and
show him the squash courts?
- Uh, certainly. Yeah. - Sure would appreciate it.
Great. See you in about 20.
(Donovan) 'We haven't had a, uh, squash court since '83..'
- Oh, Perry. - Harlan, uh..
I, I-I-I was just looking for you. Uh..
I talked to the insurance company again.
This whole thing is just a nightmare.
I feel so, I mean..
I know it's not my fault.
No, no, Harlan, look, I think you're being
too hard on yourself here.
Tell you what. I'll buy you dinner.
Uh, no, no. Uh..
I can give you a detailed account of why
this is such a morass.
I feel terrible, Perry, really, I do.
No, really. Harlan, uh..
- No, no, I insist, I insist. - Wait a minute.
'See, I've got something..'
(Harlan) 'Bye now, Perry.'
- Yeah. - Chief.
It was just bad luck running into Harlan like that.
I don't know, somehow, I think I should've
found some way around it, you know, I..
Chief, why don't you go back to the "Planet," and I'll--
Hey, bud, you got a light?
Ah, yeah.
On second thought, smoking's a bad habit.
- Lois? - Oh, Lord.
She's gone round the behind.
Hardly.
Harlan's financial records?
Lois, you didn't get into my club.
Yep.
But not the billiard room.
Banged a few balls with a guy named Krell.
The bar?
Had a few belts. Charged 'em to you.
Yeah, but you didn't..
You didn't go to the..
Well, when you gotta go, you gotta go.
Lois. Ha-ha.
You are amazing.
Hey, what the hell are you looking at?
It's a girl. Hey, it's a..
Lois, tell him you're a girl.
Chief, people are gonna see what they wanna see.
That's it.
What?
It's not the grandfather or Chen.
It's a master
or maybe somebody who's been around a master
their entire life, like his granddaughter.
Lin Chow.
So, it is you.
What you have done is a shameful thing.
You have stolen the dragon's heart.
I'm sorry, grandpa.
I thought that--
Do not think.
The Long Sum is mine to give
not yours to take.
You have dishonored me.
Give them back.
[laughs]
- Lin, no. - Grandpa!
Jzuk Mao! To have called you student is my greatest shame.
Unhand her!
Okay, everybody calm down.
Daddy's home.
Let him go.
Sure.
Just kidding.
Of course I'm not gonna let him go.
And there's nothing you can do about it
as long as old Jzuk here's got those bracelets on.
'And aren't they smart?'
Accessories for any and all occasions.
Alright, you've got them. Now get out.
Oh, there's a few other things I'd like to know
like, oh, I don't know, where's the rest
of the money you stole from me?
You'll get it when you let my grandfather go.
You know, I like this.
Your arm's about to get torn off
and you're little miss spunk.
'Tell you what.'
We'll table the money thing for now.
There's something I want even more.
Superman.
Maybe we should try the Chow loft again.
Chen said that she likes to come down to this market
at night and buy her grandfather's tea.
This is it right here.
Now, see, part of the key is planning ahead.
Planning ahead, right.
I think we should get you into pharmaceuticals.
It can be risky, but..
Jimmy, look.
I don't even have my money back yet.
See, see, that's what I'm talking about
with planning ahead.
You will have your money back, and when you do
you've gotta know exactly what to do with it.
Now, here, I put together this chart to illustrate.
Now, wait, Jimmy, this goes all the way up to 2024.
Big picture, chief.
I want you thinking
big picture.
[knock on door]
Please, I need Lois Lane.
I can't believe with all those different types of tea
you like Lapsang Souchong.
I mean, what happened to classic orange pekoe?
(Jimmy) 'Lois!'
C.K.
Black said that unless Superman comes at 11 o'clock
he'll kill grandpa, and there's nothing I can do to stop him.
Ten minutes.
What does he want Superman for?
With Superman dead, Harlan's smuggling business
gets a lot easier.
That's something the police should know.
I'll be right back.
I fought Superman.
He has a Chi of steel
and if I could show him how to use it, he could beat Jzuk.
I'm sorry, Lin, I don't know how to call him.
I mean, he usually just shows up when I need him.
And I always will.
Against Jzuk
your strength
is your weakness.
He'll use it against you.
How's Superman supposed to fight him without being strong?
[sighs] It's five to 11:00.
If only he had more time to learn
which he would if the grandfather
wasn't a hostage.
Lois, uh..
Superman has saved us dozens of times.
This is our chance to help him.
[sighs] Guilt. The kung fu of emotions.
Remember
the more you fight
the more you give him.
And the reverse
is also true.
Don't make a sound.
We're too late.
11:00 o'clock. Good.
I like my superheroes punctual.
Jzuk.
'A contest!'
Super strength against super chi.
Personally, I'd put my money on Jzuk
wouldn't you, Ms. Lane?
You are Lois Lane, aren't you?
'A great reporter'
but a lousy commando.
Nobody's perfect.
You're a good dresser
but a lousy human being.
Really? You like the suit?
I've come to take the Dragon's Heart back
to its rightful owner.
May I have it, please?
[laughing]
Don't say I didn't ask nicely.
Alright! Just in time, baby.
Kill him.
[instrumental music]
[grunting]
(Harlan) 'Jzuk, get up!'
(Mr. Chow) 'Jzuk Mao, you have lost. Do what's honorable.'
'Give up the dragon bracelets.'
Oh, please.
Give me a break with this bowing crap.
Come on, Superman, you want to get crazy, huh? Come on.
What the..
Ahh!
The power.
He cannot control it.
It controls him.
[screaming]
[siren wailing in distance]
That'll be Clark with the police.
Everybody back up.
Hyah!
Not bad.
[Harlan coughing]
Thank you.
But they are not mine.
They belong to Lin
'my granddaughter.'
Tenth-level Ye Chi master.
Glad we're on the same side now.
(Lois) 'Smells great, Mr. Kent.'
And since Lin was able to return all the money
the police aren't pressing any charges.
Except against Harlan.
Lots of charges there.
Jimmy's is gonna start investing
Perry's money tomorrow morning
and Perry asked me to tell you, Lois
that he has reviewed his financial records
and decided he has a little bit more cash
to play with every month than he thought
now that he has resigned from the men's club.
Well, welcome to the 20th century, chief.
Okay, folks, here we are.
Hot stuff.
Eat hearty.
Oh, Jonathan, it's beautiful.
It's delicious.
Dad, I am impressed.
It's beginner's luck.
Oh, beginner's nothing.
Mr. Kent, I haven't had Chinese food this good since..
I've never had Chinese food this good.
[laughing]
Jonathan, you look a little perturbed.
Is something wrong?
Martha, do I really just sit around all day
and play checkers?
No.
Sometimes you watch football.
Read.
Take amazingly long naps.
(Jonathan) 'Ah..'
When we're visiting Clark.
[laughing]
But at home you're up at 4:00 a.m.
every morning running a farm.
Well, so are you.
Honey, the point of all this
isn't that I work harder than you
but that we both work hard
except when we're visiting our son.
[laughing]
You know, this was fun.
'I'm almost sorry things have to go back to the way they were.'
(Martha) 'Oh, they don't have to.'
(Jonathan) 'What?'
(Martha) 'You can keep making the meals.'
'Mmm, you're good.'
Martha, I've got a confession.
But, personally
I'd order from the Szechwan Palace.
Now, the House of Hunan is great
but all this garlic just gives me gas.
Mom.
'We're in front of company here.'
Oh, I'm sorry. She's family.
[instrumental music]
[theme music]