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[theme music playing]
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[Frasier]
I'd like to take this opportunity
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to wish you all
the very, very best of holidays.
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Like many of you,
I'll be spending the time
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in the loving embrace of my family,
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which should give us all plenty
to talk about in the new year. [chuckles]
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Meantime, this is Dr. Frasier Crane,
KACL 780, talk radio.
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Come on, Frasier.
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There's a gin-and-tonic out there
with my name on it.
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You can tell Father Mike's had a few.
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He's trying to get everyone
to re-enact the Nativity scene.
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Well, we know
who he can get to play the ass.
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[barks]
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- I'm wearing her down.
- [chuckles]
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- Who's that for?
- It's for Roz.
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"Amazing trick microphone.
Squirts water." Nice, yeah.
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It's a gag.
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We agreed not to exchange gifts.
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Listen, doc, I'm scheduled
to do the noon-to-four slot on Christmas.
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No.
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But, doc, my whole family
is getting together in Chicago
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for the first time in five years.
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I am touched, and I don't care.
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But my-- My sister and her new baby...
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Listen, Bulldog,
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my son Frederick
is flying in tomorrow afternoon
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to spend the holidays with me.
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Now, I've never looked so forward
to a Christmas since I was, uh...
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well, your size.
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[yelling] Did you tell him yet, Bulldog?
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Dave, you don't have to yell.
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You're not up in the chopper
giving us a traffic report.
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[yelling] I was yelling?
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Hey, doc, you know, uh,
Bonnie Weems, right?
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Well, I don't actually know her,
but she does the auto show, right?
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Right. Bonnie tends to drink
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a little more than she should
at these parties.
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So the newest on-air personality
always drives her home.
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That's you, rookie.
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Oh, that sounds like a good tradition.
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I'd be delighted to drive her home.
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She'll be delighted to hear that.
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[both laughing]
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Merry Christmas.
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- Merry Christmas, Dr. Crane.
- Oh, Merry Christmas, Elizabeth.
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- I baked you some sugar cookies.
- Oh, well, how sweet of you.
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Sweets from the sweet.
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Would you by any chance happen to know
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who's driving Bonnie Weems home tonight?
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Yes. I am. And maybe you can tell me why--
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Hey, everybody, it's the doc!
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[all laughing]
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Roz, would you mind telling me
why everyone breaks into hysterics
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whenever I say that
I'm driving Bonnie Weems home?
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- [laughing]
- Oh, what is that?
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Well, Bonnie Weems
is kind of an office legend.
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She gets a couple of drinks
under her belt,
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and she gets a little amorous,
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and she will not take no for an answer.
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Oh, is that all? I'm a big boy.
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I can take care of myself.
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Okay.
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Oh, now listen, Roz, Roz.
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I know we promised not to,
but I couldn't help it.
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- I was out shopping--
- Oh, no. Don't worry, Frasier.
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- I couldn't help myself either.
- Oh, no.
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- Really?
- Yes.
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Great.
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- Merry Christmas.
- Oh, Roz.
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- Go on.
- You shouldn't have.
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- Open yours first.
- This is just...
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Oh, Roz.
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Roz, you really shouldn't have.
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- Now it's my turn.
- Oh, no, no, no.
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Maybe you should just think about
keeping that under the tree.
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Oh, me wait to open a Christmas present?
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Yeah, right.
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Oh, my God. It's great.
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It's great because I'm in radio.
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That's what I was going for. Yes.
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Well, thanks a million, Frasier.
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Have a happy holiday,
and I'll see you next week.
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Okay.
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- Merry Christmas.
- Merry Christmas.
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[woman] Dr. Crane?
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- Yes.
- I'm Bonnie Weems.
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Well, hello. It's a pleasure to meet you.
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I'll be driving you home tonight.
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- I'm sorry to put you out.
- Oh, it's no problem at all.
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I'll tell you what. Go enjoy the party.
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Let me know when you're ready to go.
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I'm ready now, baby.
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[door opens]
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- Hello, Frasier.
- Oh, hello, Niles.
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Merry Christmas.
To what do I owe this occasion?
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Oh, nothing.
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Just stopped by to get an opinion
on a gift I was considering for Maris.
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Well, it pinches a bit under the arms,
but you be the judge.
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Oh, hello, Dr. Crane.
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Daphne.
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Shall I put the little red one back on
so you can make your choice?
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I think Niles has all
the information he needs. Thank you.
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Fair enough.
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You know, Maris and Daphne
are roughly the same size.
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Give or take a foot.
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Hey, Frasier, where you been?
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Well, I... After the Christmas party,
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I poured a colleague into a cab,
said a quick prayer for the driver,
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dislodged the wedgie of a lifetime...
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then I did a bit
of last-minute Christmas shopping.
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Niles, some sherry?
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- Thank you.
- [Frasier] You know,
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Santa Claus is gonna be
very, very good to Frederick this year.
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By the way,
Bulldog called a couple of times.
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He wanted to know
if you'd take his slot on Christmas Day.
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I already told him no.
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How long will that man nag me?
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Dad, what are you doing with that?
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- I'm gonna hang it on the front door.
- Yeah, but it's plastic.
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Of course it's plastic.
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You think a real one
would have lasted since 1967?
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Here you go.
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Oh, I'm glad to be out of that black one.
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I had to take me undies off
just to get the zipper up.
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- [glass shatters]
- Oh, dear. Let me get that.
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[phone ringing]
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Hello.
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Oh, hi.
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Frasier, it's for you. It's the nag.
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Oh, Lord.
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Listen, Bulldog, I already told you--
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Oh. Oh, hello, Lilith.
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Yeah, well, maybe I should, uh...
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I'll take this in the bedroom.
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Niles? Uh, everything's all set
for tomorrow, right?
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Yes, yes. Maris and I
are driving up to the cabin tonight.
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We'll expect you and Frasier
and Frederick tomorrow around noon.
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Oh, I wish I was coming with you.
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So do I.
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[indistinct arguing over phone]
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Oh, shut the hell up, will you?
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Daphne. Daphne, you should come.
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We have the most wonderful
traditional Christmas.
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It's an actual log cabin,
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with actual deer grazing
through the snow in our front yard.
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Of course, Maris fires off her shotgun
from time to time
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to scare them away from our garbage,
but still, it's enchanting.
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Yeah. You sure you can't come, Daph?
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No, I promised me Uncle Jackie I'd fly
down to San Francisco to be with him.
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Well, I guess you should be
with your family at this time of year.
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It's more traditional.
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Except that Jackie's a transvestite.
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Getting a bit long in the tooth
for it too, if you ask me.
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Thanksgiving he ate too much turkey
and I had to cut him out of his pantyhose.
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Well, Merry Christmas, everybody.
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Lilith isn't sending Frederick.
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What? Why not?
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Oh, apparently he has
this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity
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for an incredible Christmas.
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A friend of hers
has rented a home in Austria.
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What's the matter
with the good old U.S.A.?
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Well, apparently it's the same house
they filmed The Sound of Music in,
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and that happens
to be Freddy's favorite movie.
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And Julie Andrews is singing
with the Salzburg Choral.
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They're having dinner with her afterwards.
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And some nonsense about a horse-driven
sleigh ride through the snow,
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and a toboggan.
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And a balloon trip through the Alps.
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And apparently, on their way back,
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they're gonna spend an entire day
at Euro Disneyland.
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Well, up at the cabin,
there's an old stump
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that the local children
seem to enjoy kicking.
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You know you have to let him go.
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Of course I have to let him go.
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Thank you for pointing out
that you know what's right.
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I was just making sure you did.
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Oh, how would I ever live without you?
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Now, now, boys, that's enough.
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Dr. Crane, you're being a good father
letting Frederick go.
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[Niles] That's right.
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It doesn't have to ruin your Christmas.
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Yeah, come on. Let's finish
decorating the Christmas tree.
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I brought up the good lights
from the storage room.
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Oh, Dad, I don't wanna use
those lights this year.
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I picked up these just yesterday.
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Chili peppers?
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Well, yes, they're very fashionable.
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Chili peppers aren't Christmas.
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Well, for that matter, neither are
Scotch pines or snow ornaments.
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If you want to be technical,
Bethlehem was in the desert.
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Fine.
Why don't we just decorate a palm tree?
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I don't need your sarcasm.
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00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:06,629
But I always use those lights.
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00:09:06,629 --> 00:09:09,007
Dad, Dad, this is my house.
These are my decorations.
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Just once, can I have one thing
the way I want it this Christmas?
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Wait a minute.
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You're upset about Freddy.
Don't take it out on me.
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00:09:14,429 --> 00:09:15,722
Oh, now you're the psychiatrist?
199
00:09:15,722 --> 00:09:18,475
Oh, I give up. Go ahead.
Decorate the thing.
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Use your chili peppers.
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00:09:19,809 --> 00:09:20,977
Oh, I don't want them anymore.
202
00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:22,854
No, go ahead. Use them.
203
00:09:22,854 --> 00:09:26,107
Maybe we could hang a few radishes,
put a nice broccoli on top.
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00:09:28,359 --> 00:09:30,862
I hope you two aren't going
to be behaving this way up at the cabin.
205
00:09:30,862 --> 00:09:32,947
Oh, we won't.
'Cause I'm not going to the cabin.
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00:09:32,947 --> 00:09:33,865
What do you mean?
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00:09:33,865 --> 00:09:35,700
- Where are you going?
- I'm staying right here.
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- You can't stay alone on Christmas.
- I decided to fill in for Bulldog.
209
00:09:38,328 --> 00:09:40,830
- Somebody will have a merry Christmas.
- Well, Merry Christmas!
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00:09:40,830 --> 00:09:42,373
- Merry Christmas!
- Merry Christmas!
211
00:09:42,373 --> 00:09:43,833
Merry Christmas!
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00:09:50,840 --> 00:09:52,342
Roz, Roz, I'm sorry.
213
00:09:52,342 --> 00:09:54,636
I didn't realize that when I volunteered
to work on Christmas,
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00:09:54,636 --> 00:09:56,679
that I would ruin your plans for the day.
215
00:09:56,679 --> 00:09:59,390
- Please don't be mad.
- Mad? What for?
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00:09:59,390 --> 00:10:02,852
My mother just flew in from Wisconsin
to be here with me today,
217
00:10:02,852 --> 00:10:06,648
but instead, I'm back in this
stinking hellhole on Christmas Day,
218
00:10:06,648 --> 00:10:10,318
when only the loneliest, most depressed
people on the planet would ever call in.
219
00:10:10,318 --> 00:10:12,695
But look how nice
you made yourself look for me.
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00:10:14,280 --> 00:10:17,408
Well, Roz, try to see
this thing from my position.
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00:10:17,408 --> 00:10:19,869
I couldn't see my son,
I had a terrible fight with my father,
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00:10:19,869 --> 00:10:21,454
and I was facing a horrible Christmas.
223
00:10:21,454 --> 00:10:23,456
And then I thought, you know,
well, maybe
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if by trying to help other people
through their troubles,
225
00:10:26,042 --> 00:10:27,168
it might get me through mine.
226
00:10:27,168 --> 00:10:29,087
I think if we really try hard,
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00:10:29,087 --> 00:10:32,132
we can maybe have
the best Christmas we've ever had.
228
00:10:33,341 --> 00:10:34,467
What do you say?
229
00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:37,178
Okay, I'm not mad. Get ready.
230
00:10:37,178 --> 00:10:38,972
I need a hug to prove we're still friends.
231
00:10:38,972 --> 00:10:40,765
- Frasier, I am not hugging you.
- Come on.
232
00:10:40,765 --> 00:10:42,267
No. You're grungy.
233
00:10:42,267 --> 00:10:43,476
Come to Papa.
234
00:10:43,476 --> 00:10:45,812
- Hug, hug, hug, hug.
- All right.
235
00:10:45,812 --> 00:10:48,189
Yuck, we're friends.
Now get ready. You're on.
236
00:10:55,196 --> 00:10:58,199
Merry Christmas, Seattle.
237
00:10:58,199 --> 00:11:00,827
Yes, this is Dr. Frasier Crane
coming to you on Christmas Day.
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00:11:00,827 --> 00:11:04,122
Christmas,
that very magical time of the year,
239
00:11:04,122 --> 00:11:08,877
when each moment is as unique
as a snowflake, never to be recreated.
240
00:11:09,669 --> 00:11:12,088
I'm sorry. The news went over.
You're gonna have to do that again.
241
00:11:13,882 --> 00:11:16,342
Merry Christmas, Seattle.
242
00:11:16,342 --> 00:11:18,803
[Frasier] Well, as we head into
our second hour,
243
00:11:18,803 --> 00:11:21,556
I'd like to lighten things up a bit.
244
00:11:22,140 --> 00:11:24,684
Although, Ned, we were certainly glad
to hear from you,
245
00:11:24,684 --> 00:11:27,353
and how you got mugged
on your way home from the soup kitchen.
246
00:11:28,438 --> 00:11:29,898
Roz, who's next?
247
00:11:29,898 --> 00:11:31,733
We have Don on line five.
248
00:11:31,733 --> 00:11:34,986
He wants to tell us about a time when
he was filled with the Christmas spirit.
249
00:11:34,986 --> 00:11:37,906
It's about time. Hello, Don.
250
00:11:37,906 --> 00:11:40,867
[Don] Hello, Dr. Crane.
Something happened to me yesterday
251
00:11:40,867 --> 00:11:43,912
that kind of sums up
why we call this the season of giving.
252
00:11:43,912 --> 00:11:47,248
Well, then swaddle me in Christmas cheer.
253
00:11:47,248 --> 00:11:49,918
Okay, well, see,
I was driving home from the gym,
254
00:11:49,918 --> 00:11:51,044
and I suddenly realized
255
00:11:51,044 --> 00:11:54,631
I had left my favorite old pair
of sneakers on the roof of the car.
256
00:11:54,631 --> 00:11:56,925
So I looked back,
and there's this homeless guy.
257
00:11:56,925 --> 00:11:59,886
And he'd already picked them up,
and he's putting them on.
258
00:11:59,886 --> 00:12:02,347
So I just thought, "What the hell?"
And I kept driving.
259
00:12:09,270 --> 00:12:11,898
So your experience
of the Christmas spirit
260
00:12:11,898 --> 00:12:15,276
would be that you didn't
slam the car into reverse,
261
00:12:15,276 --> 00:12:16,361
speed back there,
262
00:12:16,361 --> 00:12:19,739
and rip a pair of smelly old sneakers
out of a homeless man's hands?
263
00:12:20,573 --> 00:12:21,866
Well, Roz, this is special.
264
00:12:21,866 --> 00:12:24,202
I think we've got Santa Claus himself
on the line.
265
00:12:25,495 --> 00:12:28,039
[man] I'm sorry. That was the last time.
266
00:12:28,039 --> 00:12:29,791
I'm okay now. I'm really okay.
267
00:12:30,333 --> 00:12:34,045
[sobbing] No, I'm not. I am not.
268
00:12:34,045 --> 00:12:35,380
Barry, listen.
269
00:12:35,380 --> 00:12:38,132
I've got to put you on hold for a bit
while you pull yourself together.
270
00:12:38,132 --> 00:12:40,176
But, please, please stay on the line.
271
00:12:40,176 --> 00:12:42,136
I'd really like to help you.
272
00:12:42,136 --> 00:12:44,639
It's all right.
I think I've got a hold of myself.
273
00:12:45,515 --> 00:12:48,059
[sobbing] No, I don't.
274
00:12:49,560 --> 00:12:54,107
[woman] So, you see, Dr. Crane,
I've fallen in the shower so many times,
275
00:12:54,107 --> 00:12:56,693
they can't fit any more pins in my hip.
276
00:13:00,613 --> 00:13:04,075
Gladys, Gladys, listen,
can I put you on hold for a second?
277
00:13:04,075 --> 00:13:05,743
There's somebody else I have to check on.
278
00:13:07,245 --> 00:13:08,329
How's it going there, Barry?
279
00:13:08,329 --> 00:13:09,914
[Barry sobbing]
280
00:13:12,542 --> 00:13:14,085
My sentiments exactly.
281
00:13:15,420 --> 00:13:18,339
[man] It still traumatizes me, Dr. Crane.
282
00:13:18,339 --> 00:13:22,218
I wake up nights
and I remember that Christmas morning.
283
00:13:22,218 --> 00:13:23,803
I walked into my mother's bedroom,
284
00:13:23,803 --> 00:13:27,473
tears running down my face,
and I said, "Mommy, Mommy,
285
00:13:27,473 --> 00:13:30,977
the puppy Santa gave me
won't wake up."
286
00:13:35,064 --> 00:13:36,316
Okay, Tom.
287
00:13:36,316 --> 00:13:41,070
You win the prize for the saddest
Christmas story we've heard today.
288
00:13:42,322 --> 00:13:43,614
Happy holidays.
289
00:13:46,743 --> 00:13:47,744
Roz.
290
00:13:50,288 --> 00:13:52,332
Roz. Roz.
291
00:13:52,332 --> 00:13:55,668
- [sobbing]
- Oh, have you been crying, Roz?
292
00:13:55,668 --> 00:13:58,129
Just for the last hour.
293
00:13:58,129 --> 00:14:00,965
Oh. Oh, listen,
why don't you just go home, honey?
294
00:14:00,965 --> 00:14:02,759
I can take over for the next two hours.
295
00:14:02,759 --> 00:14:05,136
- But you can't do this on your own.
- Oh, sure I can.
296
00:14:05,136 --> 00:14:06,637
Go home, be with your mom.
297
00:14:06,637 --> 00:14:09,390
Won't it even be sadder
with you here all by yourself?
298
00:14:09,390 --> 00:14:10,975
I don't think that's possible.
299
00:14:12,310 --> 00:14:14,854
Well, if you really mean it, then I'll go.
300
00:14:14,854 --> 00:14:15,980
- I mean it.
- [sniffles]
301
00:14:17,940 --> 00:14:20,443
But, Frasier, promise me one thing.
302
00:14:20,443 --> 00:14:22,445
Don't sit here and get more depressed.
303
00:14:22,445 --> 00:14:24,614
You'll see your little boy again soon.
304
00:14:25,198 --> 00:14:27,158
- I know I will.
- Okay.
305
00:14:27,158 --> 00:14:28,242
Hug, hug, hug.
306
00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:33,456
Merry Christmas. [sobbing]
307
00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:35,208
[Frasier] Hi, we're back.
308
00:14:36,459 --> 00:14:37,627
Well, you know what?
309
00:14:37,627 --> 00:14:40,463
I realize it's been a pretty tough day
out there for most of you, and, uh...
310
00:14:41,172 --> 00:14:45,009
I'd like to hear now from someone
who's having a good Christmas.
311
00:14:45,593 --> 00:14:46,761
Uh...
312
00:14:46,761 --> 00:14:50,223
You know, someone who's maybe
learned a way to beat the holiday blues.
313
00:14:50,223 --> 00:14:51,057
How about it?
314
00:14:51,557 --> 00:14:53,434
Well, let's take our first call here.
315
00:14:54,227 --> 00:14:55,937
Hello, you're on the air.
316
00:14:55,937 --> 00:14:57,355
[man] Hello, Dr. Crane.
317
00:14:57,355 --> 00:15:00,108
- This is Jeff.
- Hello, Jeff. Merry Christmas.
318
00:15:00,108 --> 00:15:03,861
Well, Merry Christmas to you.
I used to get depressed on Christmas.
319
00:15:03,861 --> 00:15:06,614
And then I found
a surefire way to beat it.
320
00:15:06,614 --> 00:15:10,493
I pop my favorite movie,
The Sound of Music, in the VCR.
321
00:15:12,078 --> 00:15:15,748
Watching Julie Andrews
lead those adorable little tykes
322
00:15:15,748 --> 00:15:17,583
through the streets of Salzburg,
323
00:15:17,583 --> 00:15:19,252
nobody could be depressed.
324
00:15:19,252 --> 00:15:20,461
I mean, nobody.
325
00:15:23,714 --> 00:15:25,341
Jeff, are you a betting man?
326
00:15:27,051 --> 00:15:28,886
Well, we're just about out of time.
327
00:15:28,886 --> 00:15:31,556
My, my, this day has flown by.
328
00:15:32,265 --> 00:15:36,394
I'd like to wish all of you happy revelers
out there a Merry Christmas.
329
00:15:36,394 --> 00:15:37,353
And for the rest of you,
330
00:15:37,353 --> 00:15:40,356
why don't you go out and treat yourself
to something special?
331
00:15:40,857 --> 00:15:43,025
Personally,
I'm gonna go get myself a meal
332
00:15:43,025 --> 00:15:45,278
at one of Seattle's fine eateries.
333
00:15:46,487 --> 00:15:49,073
I don't know where,
but I promise you one thing,
334
00:15:49,782 --> 00:15:51,492
it'll have a liquor license.
335
00:15:54,036 --> 00:15:55,496
Just kidding. Heh.
336
00:15:55,496 --> 00:15:56,622
Don't drink and drive.
337
00:15:57,123 --> 00:16:03,087
This is Dr. Frasier Crane,
KACL 780, talk radio.
338
00:16:08,468 --> 00:16:09,719
[sighs]
339
00:16:10,136 --> 00:16:12,138
[chattering]
340
00:16:24,484 --> 00:16:25,401
Thank you.
341
00:16:38,581 --> 00:16:39,749
[waitress] Merry Christmas.
342
00:16:39,749 --> 00:16:41,542
Welcome to Lou's.
343
00:16:43,336 --> 00:16:44,170
Thank you.
344
00:16:45,004 --> 00:16:46,130
I'm sure glad you're open.
345
00:16:46,130 --> 00:16:48,925
All the other places in town
are either closed or all booked up.
346
00:16:48,925 --> 00:16:50,968
That's what makes us so special.
347
00:16:52,637 --> 00:16:54,430
I can bring you a menu,
348
00:16:54,430 --> 00:16:57,725
but almost everybody's having
the Christmas platter.
349
00:16:57,725 --> 00:17:00,228
That's a turkey log with mashed potatoes.
350
00:17:00,228 --> 00:17:02,230
Then yule log for dessert.
351
00:17:02,897 --> 00:17:06,609
How much more appetizing food always
becomes when you add the word "log."
352
00:17:08,611 --> 00:17:11,697
I'll just have the Christmas platter.
353
00:17:11,697 --> 00:17:12,865
Platter!
354
00:17:15,368 --> 00:17:16,244
How you doin'?
355
00:17:17,119 --> 00:17:17,954
Okay.
356
00:17:18,871 --> 00:17:20,331
You having a merry Christmas?
357
00:17:21,207 --> 00:17:22,833
Now that you ask, no, I'm not.
358
00:17:24,001 --> 00:17:25,336
Can't be with my son.
359
00:17:25,336 --> 00:17:29,340
Had a terrible argument
over something stupid with my father.
360
00:17:30,132 --> 00:17:31,968
- That's why I'm alone.
- Oh.
361
00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:33,594
How about you?
362
00:17:34,262 --> 00:17:35,721
Pretty good, actually.
363
00:17:35,721 --> 00:17:38,474
Just yesterday, I was crossing the street,
364
00:17:38,474 --> 00:17:41,978
and this beautiful pair of sneakers
flew off the back of a car
365
00:17:41,978 --> 00:17:43,563
and landed on my feet.
366
00:17:43,563 --> 00:17:45,064
[laughs]
367
00:17:45,940 --> 00:17:47,066
Merry Christmas.
368
00:17:49,443 --> 00:17:50,403
Here you go.
369
00:17:51,195 --> 00:17:54,907
Well, the chef didn't exactly
dally over the remoulade, did he?
370
00:18:00,788 --> 00:18:01,789
Hey, Tim.
371
00:18:02,290 --> 00:18:03,416
Merry Christmas.
372
00:18:03,416 --> 00:18:06,210
Hey, Bill. Same to you.
Glad you could make it.
373
00:18:06,210 --> 00:18:07,753
Well, I wouldn't miss this.
374
00:18:07,753 --> 00:18:09,297
How's that turkey platter?
375
00:18:09,297 --> 00:18:10,715
Good as last year's?
376
00:18:10,715 --> 00:18:12,883
I'm not sure this isn't last year's.
377
00:18:14,218 --> 00:18:15,469
- [coughs]
- Huh?
378
00:18:15,469 --> 00:18:18,598
Listen, I'm done here.
Go ahead and take this seat.
379
00:18:18,598 --> 00:18:20,433
- Oh, geez, thanks, pal.
- You bet.
380
00:18:26,814 --> 00:18:27,732
Oh, no.
381
00:18:27,732 --> 00:18:28,816
Excuse me, miss.
382
00:18:28,816 --> 00:18:30,901
Uh, something rather embarrassing
has just happened.
383
00:18:30,901 --> 00:18:33,237
I seem to have lost my wallet.
384
00:18:33,237 --> 00:18:34,572
You mean you can't pay?
385
00:18:34,572 --> 00:18:37,325
Oh, no. I can pay. I can pay.
386
00:18:37,325 --> 00:18:39,660
- I must have left it at the office.
- [waitress] Uh-huh.
387
00:18:39,660 --> 00:18:41,287
Well, I could just go back there
and get it.
388
00:18:41,287 --> 00:18:42,705
[Tim] Lou, it's all right.
389
00:18:42,705 --> 00:18:43,914
This one's on me.
390
00:18:43,914 --> 00:18:46,667
Oh, no, no, no.
You don't understand. I... I...
391
00:18:46,667 --> 00:18:49,420
It's okay, buddy. We've all been there.
392
00:18:49,420 --> 00:18:51,672
Yes, but you see,
I really did misplace my wallet.
393
00:18:51,672 --> 00:18:52,840
I know you did.
394
00:18:52,840 --> 00:18:56,636
And Bill here misplaced
his Wall Street portfolio. [laughs]
395
00:18:58,804 --> 00:19:00,681
- Here, Bill, help me out.
- Oh.
396
00:19:01,807 --> 00:19:03,976
- Oh, no, no, no.
- Hey, everybody.
397
00:19:03,976 --> 00:19:05,519
- People.
- No, that's not necessary.
398
00:19:05,519 --> 00:19:08,773
Come on, let's help a poor man
get a nice Christmas dinner.
399
00:19:08,773 --> 00:19:09,982
- Come on.
- No, no, please.
400
00:19:09,982 --> 00:19:11,901
- Anything. It doesn't matter.
- You don't understand.
401
00:19:11,901 --> 00:19:13,319
Even pennies.
402
00:19:13,319 --> 00:19:16,197
- I make a very decent living. I really do.
- Thank you very much.
403
00:19:16,197 --> 00:19:18,574
- Merry Christmas.
- This is not necessary.
404
00:19:18,574 --> 00:19:22,328
Well, I must say,
I've never been so touched in my life.
405
00:19:22,912 --> 00:19:25,456
To think that you people
would give up your money,
406
00:19:25,456 --> 00:19:29,669
which you can ill afford,
to help out a fellow human being.
407
00:19:29,669 --> 00:19:30,628
There you go, Lou.
408
00:19:31,545 --> 00:19:32,380
Gee, I'm...
409
00:19:33,047 --> 00:19:34,590
I'm still so embarrassed.
410
00:19:34,590 --> 00:19:36,300
Don't be embarrassed.
411
00:19:36,300 --> 00:19:37,468
Look at it this way.
412
00:19:37,468 --> 00:19:40,179
The rest of the year
belongs to the rich people
413
00:19:40,179 --> 00:19:43,891
with their fancy houses
and expensive foreign cars.
414
00:19:45,559 --> 00:19:46,852
But Christmas...
415
00:19:47,603 --> 00:19:50,314
Christmas belongs to guys like us.
416
00:19:52,233 --> 00:19:53,067
Right.
417
00:19:53,818 --> 00:19:55,319
Well, I never will forget this Christmas.
418
00:19:56,404 --> 00:19:59,073
Thank you. Thank you all. Thanks.
419
00:20:25,850 --> 00:20:26,851
[Lou] Hey.
420
00:20:27,852 --> 00:20:29,645
Somebody lose a set of car keys?
421
00:21:01,927 --> 00:21:04,013
Hey, we're not buying you dessert.
422
00:21:05,514 --> 00:21:08,559
No, you see, I, uh... I forgot, uh...
423
00:21:08,559 --> 00:21:09,727
What?
424
00:21:09,727 --> 00:21:10,895
Uh...
425
00:21:12,229 --> 00:21:14,523
To wish you a Merry Christmas.
426
00:21:14,523 --> 00:21:16,233
- Merry Christmas.
- Merry Christmas.
427
00:21:16,233 --> 00:21:17,526
Merry Christmas.
428
00:21:17,526 --> 00:21:18,652
Hey, bud.
429
00:21:21,322 --> 00:21:22,323
Since you're here.
430
00:21:24,116 --> 00:21:25,534
Go call your old man.
431
00:21:26,452 --> 00:21:27,328
[chuckles]
432
00:21:28,329 --> 00:21:29,288
Thank you.
433
00:21:30,247 --> 00:21:31,290
I think I will.
434
00:21:46,931 --> 00:21:48,182
[theme music playing]
435
00:21:48,182 --> 00:21:53,229
♪ Hey, baby, I hear the blues a-callin'
Tossed salads and scrambled eggs ♪
436
00:21:53,854 --> 00:21:55,231
Quite stylish.
437
00:21:55,231 --> 00:21:57,525
♪ And maybe I seem a bit confused ♪
438
00:21:57,525 --> 00:22:00,319
♪ Well, maybe, but I got you pegged ♪
439
00:22:00,319 --> 00:22:02,446
♪ Ha, ha, ha, ha ♪
440
00:22:02,446 --> 00:22:04,031
♪ But I don't know what to do ♪
441
00:22:04,031 --> 00:22:07,660
♪ With those tossed salads
And scrambled eggs ♪
442
00:22:08,327 --> 00:22:10,538
♪ They're callin' again ♪
443
00:22:11,121 --> 00:22:13,123
Good night, Seattle! We love you!