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[theme music playing]
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[playing heartfelt piano melody]
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Dad, he's doing it again.
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Must this dog stare at me all the time?
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I don't know. Eddie, must you?
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Apparently, he must.
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What is so fascinating about me?
What is it?
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In your eyes, is my head
a large piece of kibble?
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Am I some sort of canine enigma?
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Think about it. Get back to me.
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Here we go, gents. Dinner's up.
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Can I give you a hand
clearing your papers?
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No, you better let me.
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I need these in a particular order.
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What is all this, anyway?
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It's an old case of mine
from the police force.
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The Weeping Lotus murder.
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Dad, I can't believe
you're still trotting this out.
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He's been trying to solve this case
for 20 years.
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And I'm not stopping till I do solve it.
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You develop certain instincts
when you're a cop.
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And my instinct tells me
that this case can be cracked.
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There just must be one small thing
I keep overlooking.
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There is: who the murderer was.
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[doorbell rings]
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- It's nice you're still so dedicated.
- It's a hobby.
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Some guys build a boat in the garage.
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I try to figure out why a maniac
would kill a hooker
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and try to stuff her entire body
into a bowling bag.
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- It's relaxing.
- [Daphne] Hmm.
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- Hello, Niles.
- Sorry I'm late, Frasier.
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Just as we were leaving,
Maris had a run-in
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with a rude directory assistance operator,
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and it shattered her calm.
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Niles, have you ever considered that maybe
Maris is a bit high-strung?
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- Maybe she should see someone.
- She's seen everyone.
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Why do you think
she was calling directory assistance?
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Evening, Dr. Crane.
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Hello, Daphne. So good to see you again.
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What an enchanting scent you're wearing.
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Must be the ranch dressing.
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Won't Mrs. Crane be coming?
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No, I'm afraid not.
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And, please, no more of this
"Dr. and Mrs. Crane" formality.
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To you, it's Niles and... uh...
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- Maris.
- Yes, Maris.
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- Glad you could join us, Niles.
- Oh, I wouldn't have missed it.
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Well, I guess the food's all ready.
Why don't we start?
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- Well, enjoy.
- Where are you going?
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I thought I'd have mine in the kitchen.
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Don't be ridiculous.
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We can't have you eating
by yourself in the kitchen. I'll join you.
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We're all eating right here,
like a family.
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End of discussion.
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Well, isn't this nice?
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Feels just like home.
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- I'm famished.
- Me too.
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You boys still say a prayer
before you eat?
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- Oh, almost forgot. Yes, yes.
- Mm. Oh, every time.
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[Frasier clears throat]
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We thank you, Lord,
for the food we're about to eat.
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You have blessed our table
with your bounty.
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And thank you, Lord,
for bringing this family together.
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And we also thank you for the other gifts
you've bestowed upon us.
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And may we always
remember to share
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- with those less fortunate.
- Oh, will you stop staring?!
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I wasn't staring.
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Amen.
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So, Frasier, did you happen to read
Derek Mann's column today?
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- You were mentioned.
- No. I missed it.
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Just as well. It wasn't flattering.
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Still, I'd like to have seen it.
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Oh, well, why didn't you say so?
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If I may ask, who's Derek Mann?
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He writes that "Mann About Town"
column for the Times.
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Boy, the things
that guy comes out with.
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Sometimes he's really funny.
What did he say about you?
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"I hate Frasier Crane."
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Oh, sorry.
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That's it? "I hate Frasier Crane"?
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- That's it.
- Ah, don't let it bother you.
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Well, actually, it doesn't, Dad.
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I knew when I chose
a career in the public eye
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that I'd be open to certain criticism.
It's the price I pay for my celebrity.
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But thank you, Niles,
for bringing me the paper.
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And thank you
for highlighting it in yellow.
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Now who would like some wine?
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- I'll have some.
- Daphne, the salad is exquisite.
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And why would he say that?
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Must be the carrots.
He always did like them.
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Not the salad. Derek Mann.
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Why would he write a thing like that?
I've never done anything to him.
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I mean, this attack
is totally unwarranted.
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- I'm a healer, for God's sake.
- Oh, for crying out loud.
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I have every right to be upset about this.
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I will not enjoy my dinner
until this is where it belongs,
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in the trash.
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Oh, oh. There was an article
I wanted to save.
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- [Martin] On what?
- Uh-- Nothing.
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- Come on, I'm interested.
- Oh, let's drop it.
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Why can't you tell me?
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All right. It all was about
Margaret Thatcher's secret
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for growing prizewinning zinnias.
Are you happy?
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Not really.
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[Frasier]
All right, Lorraine, now, calm down
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and try to listen
to what I'm going to say to you.
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- Will you do that?
- [Lorraine over phone] Okay.
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All right. Good girl.
Now, your problem--
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- [line clicks]
- Oh, my gosh. That's call waiting.
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Someone else is trying to get through.
Do you mind if I take it?
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No, no. Go right ahead.
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Well, it's certainly a very interesting
situation she's got herself in.
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Don't you think so, Roz?
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Yes.
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- Okay, I'm back.
- All right, Lorraine.
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Now listen very carefully
to what I'm going to tell you.
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- Your problem seems to--
- [line clicks]
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Oh, I'm sorry.
I'll be right back. [chuckles]
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Oh. For someone
who's got so many problems,
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she certainly is popular.
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Okay. Go ahead, Dr. Crane. I'm here.
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- [line clicks]
- Oh! I don't believe this. Another call.
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Now hold it right there, Lorraine.
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The reason you want to take that call
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is the same reason
you want to change your career
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and break up with your boyfriend.
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You're obsessed
with what you think you're missing,
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the "better offer"
the "call on the other line."
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Well, you've got to take one call
at a time from now on.
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Fully explore and experience
each one in its turn,
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and you'll be a stronger person for it.
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- Do you follow me, Lorraine?
- Okay, I'm back!
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Thank you for your call.
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We've only got a few minutes left,
so I would like to end today's program
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on a personal note.
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As some of you may know,
yesterday I was mentioned
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in Derek Mann's
"Mann About Town" column.
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He said, and I quote,
"I hate Frasier Crane."
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"I hate Frasier Crane."
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What trenchant criticism.
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Move aside, Voltaire.
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Step back into the shadows,
H.L. Mencken.
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There's a new kid in town.
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One can only wonder how many hours
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Derek Mann sat in the glow
of his computer screen
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before his trembling fingers
sprang to life
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and pecked out this chef d'oeuvre...
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"I hate Frasier Crane."
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A lesser critic
would have wasted our time
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by presenting a well-thought-out
point-by-point
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constructive critique of this show.
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But, no, not our Mr. Mann.
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So, dear listeners,
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when Mr. Mann's column
arrives on your doorstep,
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read it, enjoy it,
but above all, treasure it.
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For one day, this man will be joining
the pantheon of the immortals.
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And if we're lucky,
it will be one day soon.
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I'm Dr. Frasier Crane.
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[blows]
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[crowd chattering]
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Frasier, how funny running into you here.
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I'm always here.
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You weren't here 20 minutes ago.
Have you seen today's Times?
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No.
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Lucky for you, I saved you this copy.
Look at Derek Mann's column.
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This is the second time
in as many days
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that you've given me a paper.
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Have you ever considered
getting yourself a route?
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Hello. I don't believe we've met.
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Oh-- Yes, we have, Niles,
three or four times.
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Roz Doyle.
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Oh, of course. It was at the, uh...
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It was during the, uh...
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I'm far too successful to feel awkward.
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Where did we meet?
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The radio station.
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I'll take your word for it.
Nice to see you again.
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Apparently, Mr. Mann heard
your program yesterday.
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So I see.
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"Yesterday afternoon,
Dr. Frasier Crane got on my case
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for not giving him
a point-by-point criticism
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00:09:03,752 --> 00:09:04,836
of his radio show.
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Well, he asked for it, so here goes."
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Oh, my God.
His entire column is about your show.
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Not very flattering, either.
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Toward the end, he even attacks
your "dim-witted sidekick call screener."
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That's me.
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Oh, now I remember you.
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"It's hard to say what
to hate most about Crane's show:
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his pompous, sanctimonious style,
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his constant self-congratulatory
references to his own life,
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or his voice,
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a mock-sympathetic tone so sickly sweet
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one wonders if the man
graduated from medical school
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or from some mind-controlling cult."
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- It's continued on 12.
- I've read enough.
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Can I get you anything?
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How could the man say something like that?
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It's my job. I'm a waiter.
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We don't want anything, thank you.
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Listen, Frasier, I know this stinks,
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but in a couple of days, it'll blow over.
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Oh, perhaps you're right.
As angry as it makes me,
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00:10:02,477 --> 00:10:05,355
to retaliate would be
to stoop to his level.
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The best response is no response at all.
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00:10:08,775 --> 00:10:11,402
Pompous and sanctimonious, am I?
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00:10:12,153 --> 00:10:15,031
Well, this Mann character
can't even write grammatical sentences.
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00:10:15,031 --> 00:10:18,785
Every five words, there's another one
of his precious dot-dot-dots.
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00:10:18,785 --> 00:10:20,662
Must be because
he likes making those dots
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00:10:20,662 --> 00:10:23,164
with the crayon
he writes this drivel with.
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00:10:25,917 --> 00:10:28,503
Dr. Crane, on line two, we have Stewart,
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00:10:28,503 --> 00:10:31,214
who's having a problem
with delayed gratification.
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00:10:31,214 --> 00:10:32,841
Well, he's just gonna have to wait.
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00:10:34,759 --> 00:10:37,095
I don't know who
this Derek Mann thinks he is,
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00:10:37,095 --> 00:10:39,347
but if he thinks
he can hide behind his newspaper
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00:10:39,347 --> 00:10:42,642
like some sniveling schoolchild
cowering behind a tree,
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00:10:42,642 --> 00:10:45,562
then I say let's expose
this Derek Mann for what he is,
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00:10:45,562 --> 00:10:48,022
not a man at all but half a man.
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What line did you say Stewart was on?
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He hung up.
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00:10:52,235 --> 00:10:54,529
Well, I'm leaving all sorts
of bodies in my wake today.
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Let's see who's on line five.
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Hello. This is Dr. Frasier Crane.
I'm listening.
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[man over phone]
Good, 'cause I was listening too.
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00:11:04,330 --> 00:11:06,457
- And you are?
- Derek Mann.
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00:11:07,834 --> 00:11:08,835
I see.
227
00:11:10,670 --> 00:11:15,091
Look, nobody calls me half a man,
especially some Ivy League twit.
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00:11:15,592 --> 00:11:18,136
So, what do you say
we settle this like men?
229
00:11:19,137 --> 00:11:21,639
Are you implying
that you want to fight me?
230
00:11:21,639 --> 00:11:23,933
I'm not implying it. I'm saying it.
231
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Fight as in a fistfight?
232
00:11:25,977 --> 00:11:28,771
No, I thought we might
throw pies at each other.
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00:11:30,273 --> 00:11:33,193
So are you up to it,
or aren't you man enough?
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We'll be right back after these messages.
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[Frasier] And we're back.
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00:11:48,124 --> 00:11:51,794
Well, we have a surprise caller
on the line, Derek Mann.
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00:11:51,794 --> 00:11:53,630
[Derek] So, what's it gonna be, Crane?
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00:11:53,630 --> 00:11:55,048
You gonna fight me or not?
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Oh, you can't be serious.
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Just like I figured, you're chicken.
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00:11:58,968 --> 00:12:01,763
No, I just don't think
that civilized people behave that way.
242
00:12:01,763 --> 00:12:05,141
You know, Roz, perhaps our listeners
have an opinion about that subject.
243
00:12:05,141 --> 00:12:07,810
- Who do we have on the line?
- Well, lines one through eight
244
00:12:07,810 --> 00:12:09,437
are people who think you're chicken.
245
00:12:11,189 --> 00:12:13,274
You're chicken, Crane. Admit it.
246
00:12:13,274 --> 00:12:14,609
I am not chicken.
247
00:12:14,609 --> 00:12:15,860
[Derek clucks]
248
00:12:15,860 --> 00:12:18,780
Look, we are mature,
thinking people, not cavemen.
249
00:12:18,780 --> 00:12:20,198
[Derek clucks]
250
00:12:20,198 --> 00:12:22,659
You want a fight so bad,
I'll give you a fight.
251
00:12:22,659 --> 00:12:24,244
You just name the time and place.
252
00:12:24,244 --> 00:12:26,329
Kinsley Square right outside your office
253
00:12:26,329 --> 00:12:28,623
by the old statue, noon tomorrow.
254
00:12:28,623 --> 00:12:32,252
- Don't back out.
- I won't.
255
00:12:33,878 --> 00:12:37,548
And don't you back out, either,
because I know where your office is too,
256
00:12:38,091 --> 00:12:41,010
and I know where you live,
and I'll track you down.
257
00:12:44,138 --> 00:12:46,057
Now, who else out there
wants a piece of me?
258
00:12:49,435 --> 00:12:51,604
[Daphne] Having a look
at that old murder case again?
259
00:12:51,604 --> 00:12:54,232
Yeah. I dug out
the old crime-scene photos.
260
00:12:54,232 --> 00:12:56,734
Well, don't be a greedy guts.
Let's have a look.
261
00:13:06,369 --> 00:13:07,537
Her name was Helen.
262
00:13:08,871 --> 00:13:09,831
Yeah, it was.
263
00:13:10,999 --> 00:13:13,710
You must have seen that
on some of the papers I had lying here.
264
00:13:13,710 --> 00:13:17,130
No, I just got this feeling
when I touched the picture.
265
00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:18,339
You're putting me on.
266
00:13:19,340 --> 00:13:21,092
She had a lot of men in her life.
267
00:13:21,092 --> 00:13:22,635
No kidding. She was a hooker.
268
00:13:24,512 --> 00:13:27,432
No, I mean she had four brothers.
269
00:13:28,933 --> 00:13:30,184
That's amazing.
270
00:13:30,184 --> 00:13:32,103
She did have four brothers.
271
00:13:32,770 --> 00:13:34,105
What else are you getting?
272
00:13:35,565 --> 00:13:37,150
Well, come on, tell me more.
273
00:13:37,150 --> 00:13:39,736
I can't just turn it on and off
like a faucet.
274
00:13:42,155 --> 00:13:45,408
Give it a try, will you, please?
What else are you getting?
275
00:13:45,408 --> 00:13:46,242
Nothing.
276
00:13:46,951 --> 00:13:47,785
No, wait.
277
00:13:48,703 --> 00:13:50,163
- I see a man.
- Yeah?
278
00:13:50,913 --> 00:13:52,582
A well-dressed man.
279
00:13:52,582 --> 00:13:55,251
He's wearing wing tips
and a trench coat.
280
00:13:55,251 --> 00:13:56,461
Yeah, yeah.
281
00:13:56,461 --> 00:13:57,962
He's getting off an elevator.
282
00:13:58,713 --> 00:14:01,007
He's walking down a long hallway.
283
00:14:01,716 --> 00:14:03,259
She doesn't know he's coming.
284
00:14:03,760 --> 00:14:05,345
He's opening the door.
285
00:14:05,345 --> 00:14:06,429
Hello, everyone.
286
00:14:10,808 --> 00:14:12,852
Sometimes I get me signals crossed.
287
00:14:15,146 --> 00:14:16,397
What's going on?
288
00:14:16,397 --> 00:14:19,567
Well, unless you killed a hooker
when you were 12, nothing much.
289
00:14:21,361 --> 00:14:22,820
[Daphne] We heard your show today.
290
00:14:22,820 --> 00:14:25,615
I just loved the way
you handled that Derek Mann.
291
00:14:25,615 --> 00:14:27,700
Ah, you made your old man proud.
292
00:14:28,201 --> 00:14:30,411
The best part was when
he challenged you to a fight
293
00:14:30,411 --> 00:14:31,829
and you stood right up to him.
294
00:14:32,413 --> 00:14:33,539
Yes, I did, didn't I?
295
00:14:35,500 --> 00:14:37,251
Boy, I can't wait to see that.
296
00:14:37,960 --> 00:14:41,172
Well, I'm not actually
gonna go through with it, Dad.
297
00:14:41,172 --> 00:14:42,965
What are you talking about?
298
00:14:42,965 --> 00:14:45,259
Well, I already won
our little war of words.
299
00:14:46,219 --> 00:14:47,553
What would I stand to benefit
300
00:14:47,553 --> 00:14:49,722
by actually going through
with a fistfight?
301
00:14:50,348 --> 00:14:52,934
Frasier, maybe I'm
misunderstanding something here.
302
00:14:53,518 --> 00:14:56,187
He challenged you,
and you're backing down?
303
00:14:56,938 --> 00:14:59,941
Well, mature people
are supposed to use their intellect
304
00:14:59,941 --> 00:15:01,567
to settle their differences.
305
00:15:01,567 --> 00:15:04,821
A man doesn't just turn tail and run.
That's not the way I brought you up.
306
00:15:04,821 --> 00:15:06,364
Are you encouraging me to fight?
307
00:15:06,364 --> 00:15:08,658
Damn right, I am.
You gave the guy your word.
308
00:15:08,658 --> 00:15:11,744
I didn't know what I was saying.
I hadn't even had lunch yet.
309
00:15:13,621 --> 00:15:17,291
I might have known this would happen.
It's Billy Kriezel all over again.
310
00:15:18,501 --> 00:15:19,502
What did you say?
311
00:15:19,502 --> 00:15:23,256
- Something about a Billy Kriezel.
- I don't believe you're dredging that up.
312
00:15:23,256 --> 00:15:24,966
That was 30 years ago.
313
00:15:24,966 --> 00:15:26,300
Who's this Billy Kriezel?
314
00:15:26,300 --> 00:15:28,594
He was a kid in 5th grade
that used to torment me.
315
00:15:28,594 --> 00:15:30,972
So one day, Frasier made fun
of Billy's crew cut.
316
00:15:30,972 --> 00:15:33,766
Well, he started it. He made fun
of the elbow patches on my blazer.
317
00:15:38,062 --> 00:15:41,065
Well, the point is they were supposed
to meet for a fight after school,
318
00:15:41,065 --> 00:15:43,317
only Patches here didn't show up.
319
00:15:43,317 --> 00:15:45,319
I had a clarinet lesson!
320
00:15:46,737 --> 00:15:48,656
You don't need to remind me of that.
321
00:15:48,656 --> 00:15:50,241
Billy's old man was a cop too.
322
00:15:50,241 --> 00:15:53,244
Boy, the guys rode me
about that excuse of yours for years.
323
00:15:53,244 --> 00:15:54,662
Every time I couldn't make it out,
324
00:15:54,662 --> 00:15:57,623
they'd say, "What's the matter?
You got a clarinet lesson?"
325
00:15:58,374 --> 00:16:01,169
Couldn't you have met Billy
after the clarinet lesson?
326
00:16:01,669 --> 00:16:03,588
Would you please excuse us for a moment?
327
00:16:05,256 --> 00:16:06,090
Of course.
328
00:16:06,799 --> 00:16:10,011
I have a feeling I'm going
to be excused a lot in this house.
329
00:16:12,847 --> 00:16:16,184
Dad, I am sorry if I embarrassed you
330
00:16:16,184 --> 00:16:19,187
for not fighting Billy Kriezel
30 years ago,
331
00:16:19,187 --> 00:16:20,897
but the situation is not the same now.
332
00:16:20,897 --> 00:16:23,065
- It's exactly the same.
- I'm an adult now.
333
00:16:23,065 --> 00:16:25,485
I have been to medical school.
I hold a certain position.
334
00:16:25,485 --> 00:16:27,778
I do not settle my differences
with brawling.
335
00:16:27,778 --> 00:16:30,823
- The man challenged you, you accepted.
- I don't believe this.
336
00:16:30,823 --> 00:16:32,783
You won't be happy
till I come home with a black eye.
337
00:16:32,783 --> 00:16:35,036
I want you to do
what you said you were gonna do.
338
00:16:35,995 --> 00:16:38,164
You know, you can talk
about your medical school,
339
00:16:38,164 --> 00:16:41,501
your intellect, your place in this city,
340
00:16:42,084 --> 00:16:43,085
but you know what?
341
00:16:43,753 --> 00:16:45,755
It's all one big clarinet lesson.
342
00:16:48,466 --> 00:16:50,092
I can't even look at you.
343
00:17:01,395 --> 00:17:03,523
[Roz] So I step out of the shower,
344
00:17:03,523 --> 00:17:08,069
I look out the window, and I notice
the garbageman looking right in at me.
345
00:17:08,069 --> 00:17:10,029
So I say, "Did you get a good look?"
346
00:17:10,029 --> 00:17:12,156
And he says,
"Not completely. Turn around."
347
00:17:14,075 --> 00:17:15,826
Then he smiles,
and he's missing a tooth.
348
00:17:15,826 --> 00:17:18,621
And that's when the romance
went right out of it for me.
349
00:17:20,748 --> 00:17:22,959
Roz, why are you telling me this story?
350
00:17:22,959 --> 00:17:24,877
I am trying to get your mind off the fact
351
00:17:24,877 --> 00:17:27,046
that in five minutes
you're gonna walk out in that square
352
00:17:27,046 --> 00:17:28,548
and get your clock cleaned.
353
00:17:29,215 --> 00:17:32,593
Did it ever occur to you
that I might actually win this fight?
354
00:17:32,593 --> 00:17:33,636
Your shoe's untied.
355
00:17:34,512 --> 00:17:36,639
If you fell for that, you're going down,
356
00:17:36,639 --> 00:17:38,057
and you're going down hard.
357
00:17:40,977 --> 00:17:43,437
There's quite a crowd forming out there.
358
00:17:43,437 --> 00:17:45,022
Secretaries with bag lunches,
359
00:17:45,022 --> 00:17:46,983
businessmen, children with balloons.
360
00:17:46,983 --> 00:17:49,193
All that's missing is a mariachi band.
361
00:17:49,193 --> 00:17:50,278
They're setting up.
362
00:17:51,988 --> 00:17:55,032
Well, I'd better go find
a great place in the crowd.
363
00:17:55,032 --> 00:17:57,285
I'll be off to the left,
Frasier, if you tear his ear off
364
00:17:57,285 --> 00:17:59,495
and wanna throw it
to a beautiful senorita.
365
00:18:01,455 --> 00:18:04,166
Frasier, as your brother
and as your friend,
366
00:18:04,834 --> 00:18:06,168
why are you doing this?
367
00:18:08,921 --> 00:18:10,548
- It's Billy Kriezel.
- Where?
368
00:18:16,804 --> 00:18:18,681
He's not here, Niles.
369
00:18:18,681 --> 00:18:22,518
It's just that I ran away
from him when I was 10.
370
00:18:22,518 --> 00:18:23,561
I remember.
371
00:18:24,478 --> 00:18:25,855
You know, and I've been...
372
00:18:26,397 --> 00:18:27,898
I've been running ever since.
373
00:18:28,983 --> 00:18:30,568
Well, this is where it stops.
374
00:18:31,694 --> 00:18:32,945
I'm not running anymore.
375
00:18:33,446 --> 00:18:36,032
What is it that makes us
Crane boys such targets?
376
00:18:42,496 --> 00:18:44,498
Chalk it up to random violence.
377
00:18:45,583 --> 00:18:46,542
No.
378
00:18:49,003 --> 00:18:50,046
Hey there.
379
00:18:51,589 --> 00:18:53,299
Dad, what are you doing here?
380
00:18:53,299 --> 00:18:56,177
Look, son, I said a couple
of things last night
381
00:18:56,177 --> 00:18:57,803
that maybe went over the line.
382
00:18:57,803 --> 00:19:00,765
Look, Dad, if you're worried
that you talked me into something
383
00:19:00,765 --> 00:19:03,351
that I wasn't ready to do, you're wrong.
384
00:19:03,351 --> 00:19:04,393
You can relax. I...
385
00:19:05,811 --> 00:19:07,647
- I'm doing this for myself.
- Good.
386
00:19:09,231 --> 00:19:12,026
Who told you that I was
going through with it, anyway?
387
00:19:12,026 --> 00:19:15,237
Ah, let's just say a father knows
certain things about his son.
388
00:19:17,865 --> 00:19:20,534
Good news.
I parked in front of a broken meter.
389
00:19:20,534 --> 00:19:21,786
We're getting a freebie.
390
00:19:22,703 --> 00:19:25,122
Well, good luck, Dr. Crane,
with the fight.
391
00:19:25,122 --> 00:19:29,502
Thank you, Daphne.
Any psychic predictions on the outcome?
392
00:19:29,502 --> 00:19:32,713
Actually, yes.
But don't worry, I'm frequently wrong.
393
00:19:36,509 --> 00:19:39,011
Frasier. There's something
I want you to see.
394
00:19:40,221 --> 00:19:43,474
There, the man standing
to the left of the statue.
395
00:19:43,474 --> 00:19:45,685
I recognize his picture
from the newspaper.
396
00:19:45,685 --> 00:19:46,894
That's Derek Mann.
397
00:19:47,812 --> 00:19:48,813
He's gigantic.
398
00:19:50,648 --> 00:19:53,275
My God, you could show
a movie on his back.
399
00:19:55,986 --> 00:19:57,988
You sure you wanna
go through with this?
400
00:19:58,489 --> 00:20:00,866
- Yes. Yes, I am.
- Good.
401
00:20:00,866 --> 00:20:02,284
Now, you'll be fine.
402
00:20:02,284 --> 00:20:03,786
Remember, this is a street fight,
403
00:20:03,786 --> 00:20:06,914
not a boxing match, so fight dirty
and throw the first punch.
404
00:20:06,914 --> 00:20:09,375
- First punch.
- I've found that a swift knee to the groin
405
00:20:09,375 --> 00:20:10,668
usually does the trick.
406
00:20:10,668 --> 00:20:12,128
If you have any doubts,
407
00:20:12,128 --> 00:20:14,880
check with a fellow in Manchester
named Nigel Tavers.
408
00:20:17,007 --> 00:20:18,843
If we want an unobstructed view...
409
00:20:18,843 --> 00:20:20,761
I'd prefer it
if you guys just stayed here.
410
00:20:20,761 --> 00:20:23,264
- You'll only make me nervous.
- Whatever you want.
411
00:20:25,349 --> 00:20:26,183
Well...
412
00:20:27,727 --> 00:20:28,644
wish me luck.
413
00:20:28,644 --> 00:20:30,354
- Okay, champ. Attaboy.
- Go get him, Dr. C.
414
00:20:31,397 --> 00:20:34,400
[band playing upbeat mariachi music]
415
00:20:36,152 --> 00:20:38,070
[Martin] They got a mariachi band
out there.
416
00:20:38,070 --> 00:20:39,447
Yes. I have to get their card.
417
00:20:39,447 --> 00:20:41,407
I need someone
for our summer barbecue.
418
00:20:42,283 --> 00:20:44,827
Oh, look, they're starting to fight.
419
00:20:44,827 --> 00:20:47,246
No, they're just circling,
sizing each other up.
420
00:20:47,747 --> 00:20:49,999
Come on, Frasier.
If you're gonna hit him, hit him first.
421
00:20:49,999 --> 00:20:51,542
[sirens wailing]
422
00:20:52,126 --> 00:20:54,587
- [Niles] Is that the police?
- Yeah. What are they doing here?
423
00:20:54,587 --> 00:20:57,173
[Daphne] They're breaking it up,
just when they were getting started.
424
00:20:57,173 --> 00:20:59,175
[crowd jeering]
425
00:21:01,761 --> 00:21:03,637
All right, I'm coming along peacefully.
426
00:21:03,637 --> 00:21:05,055
Just let me get my jacket.
427
00:21:05,055 --> 00:21:06,932
Relax. I'm not arresting you.
428
00:21:06,932 --> 00:21:09,810
But I'm warning you, in this town,
we don't settle our differences
429
00:21:09,810 --> 00:21:11,771
with street fights, no matter who you are.
430
00:21:12,646 --> 00:21:15,357
Well, thank you, officer.
You'll have no more trouble from me.
431
00:21:15,357 --> 00:21:16,192
Okay.
432
00:21:17,985 --> 00:21:20,279
Dad, Dad, did you see me?
433
00:21:20,279 --> 00:21:21,906
My hands are trembling.
434
00:21:21,906 --> 00:21:24,825
My chest is pounding. My mouth is all dry.
My knees are like Jell-O.
435
00:21:24,825 --> 00:21:26,160
I feel great.
436
00:21:27,661 --> 00:21:28,662
You did good.
437
00:21:28,662 --> 00:21:30,831
Yeah, I was out there. I was ready.
438
00:21:30,831 --> 00:21:32,583
You saw that, right? I was ready.
439
00:21:32,583 --> 00:21:34,543
I know. You would've kicked his butt.
440
00:21:34,543 --> 00:21:37,171
- From here to Tacoma.
- I say we celebrate.
441
00:21:37,171 --> 00:21:39,799
Everyone, a round
of victory lattes on me.
442
00:21:39,799 --> 00:21:40,633
Yeah!
443
00:21:46,305 --> 00:21:47,640
Thanks, Harry. I owe you one.
444
00:21:47,640 --> 00:21:49,642
- No problem.
- You cut it kind of close, though.
445
00:21:49,642 --> 00:21:51,727
Another minute and Frasier
would've been eating sidewalk.
446
00:21:51,727 --> 00:21:53,979
Give me a break.
I'm missing lunch for this.
447
00:21:53,979 --> 00:21:56,023
You could stand to miss a few lunches.
448
00:21:56,023 --> 00:21:57,733
Some of the guys are getting together
449
00:21:57,733 --> 00:21:59,735
down at Duke's for a beer.
Why don't you come?
450
00:21:59,735 --> 00:22:01,403
Yeah. Maybe I will.
451
00:22:01,403 --> 00:22:02,530
You know why I will?
452
00:22:03,072 --> 00:22:05,950
'Cause the Crane boys
don't take clarinet lessons anymore.
453
00:22:06,450 --> 00:22:08,327
What the hell are you talking about?
454
00:22:08,911 --> 00:22:11,413
Oh, that's right.
You weren't in my precinct.
455
00:22:16,794 --> 00:22:17,962
[theme music playing]
456
00:22:17,962 --> 00:22:20,130
♪ Hey, baby, I hear the blues a-callin' ♪
457
00:22:20,130 --> 00:22:23,092
♪ Tossed salads and scrambled eggs ♪
458
00:22:23,676 --> 00:22:25,010
♪ Oh, my ♪
459
00:22:25,010 --> 00:22:27,263
♪ And maybe I seem a bit confused ♪
460
00:22:27,263 --> 00:22:30,015
♪ Well, maybe, but I got you pegged ♪
461
00:22:30,015 --> 00:22:32,226
[laughs]
462
00:22:32,226 --> 00:22:33,894
♪ But I don't know what to do ♪
463
00:22:33,894 --> 00:22:37,314
♪ With those tossed salads
And scrambled eggs ♪
464
00:22:38,107 --> 00:22:39,859
♪ They're callin' again ♪
465
00:22:40,901 --> 00:22:41,777
Thank you!