1
00:00:10,719 --> 00:00:14,013
Listen to yourself, Bob.
You follow her to work.
2
00:00:14,014 --> 00:00:15,681
You eavesdrop on her calls.
3
00:00:15,682 --> 00:00:17,266
You open her mail.
4
00:00:17,267 --> 00:00:20,978
The minute you started doing these things,
the relationship was over.
5
00:00:20,979 --> 00:00:22,231
Thank you for your call.
6
00:00:24,858 --> 00:00:26,776
Roz, I think we have time for one more.
7
00:00:26,777 --> 00:00:27,777
Yes, Dr. Crane.
8
00:00:27,778 --> 00:00:30,447
On line four we have
Russell from Kirkland.
9
00:00:31,740 --> 00:00:34,367
Hello, Russell, this is Dr. Frasier Crane.
10
00:00:34,368 --> 00:00:35,284
I'm listening.
11
00:00:35,285 --> 00:00:37,996
Well, I've been
feeling sort of, you know...
12
00:00:38,539 --> 00:00:39,623
depressed lately.
13
00:00:40,499 --> 00:00:42,875
My life's not going anywhere.
14
00:00:42,876 --> 00:00:45,003
And it's not that bad. It's just...
15
00:00:45,837 --> 00:00:48,506
the same old apartment, same old job...
16
00:00:48,507 --> 00:00:51,342
Uh, Russell,
we're just about at end of our hour.
17
00:00:51,343 --> 00:00:55,347
Let me see if I can cut to the chase
by using myself as an example.
18
00:00:56,098 --> 00:00:59,392
Six months ago I was living in Boston.
19
00:00:59,393 --> 00:01:03,104
My wife had left me,
which was very painful,
20
00:01:03,105 --> 00:01:04,605
then she came back to me...
21
00:01:04,606 --> 00:01:05,899
which was excruciating.
22
00:01:11,321 --> 00:01:14,241
On top of that,
my practice had grown stagnant
23
00:01:14,700 --> 00:01:16,368
and my social life consisted of,
24
00:01:17,619 --> 00:01:19,871
well, hanging around a bar
night after night.
25
00:01:21,415 --> 00:01:24,709
You see, I was clinging to a life
that wasn't working anymore.
26
00:01:24,710 --> 00:01:26,962
And I knew I had
to do something, anything.
27
00:01:27,504 --> 00:01:29,297
So I ended the marriage once and for all,
28
00:01:29,298 --> 00:01:32,675
packed up my things and moved
back here to my hometown of Seattle.
29
00:01:32,676 --> 00:01:33,594
Go Seahawks.
30
00:01:34,970 --> 00:01:38,306
I took action, Russell, and you can too.
31
00:01:38,307 --> 00:01:40,683
Move, change, do something.
32
00:01:40,684 --> 00:01:44,354
If it's a mistake do something else.
Will you do that, Russell?
33
00:01:46,356 --> 00:01:49,067
Will you? Russell?
34
00:01:50,277 --> 00:01:51,153
I think we lost him.
35
00:01:51,737 --> 00:01:54,156
No, we cut to the news 30 seconds ago.
36
00:01:57,451 --> 00:01:59,244
Oh, for crying out loud!
37
00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:01,954
I finally bare my soul to all of Seattle
38
00:02:01,955 --> 00:02:04,583
and they're listening to
Chopper Dave's Rush-Hour Roundup!
39
00:02:07,336 --> 00:02:08,879
The rest of the show was pretty good.
40
00:02:10,672 --> 00:02:12,381
It was a good show, wasn't it?
41
00:02:12,382 --> 00:02:14,592
Here, your brother called.
42
00:02:14,593 --> 00:02:16,761
Roz, in the trade,
we call that avoidance.
43
00:02:16,762 --> 00:02:18,846
Don't change the subject.
Tell me what you think.
44
00:02:18,847 --> 00:02:21,474
Did I ever tell you
what this little button does?
45
00:02:21,475 --> 00:02:23,643
I am not a piece of Lalique.
46
00:02:23,644 --> 00:02:25,436
I can handle criticism.
47
00:02:25,437 --> 00:02:27,481
- How was I today?
- Let's see.
48
00:02:28,231 --> 00:02:30,024
You dropped two commercials,
49
00:02:30,025 --> 00:02:32,234
you left a total
of 28 seconds of dead air,
50
00:02:32,235 --> 00:02:35,446
you scrambled the station's call letters,
you spilled yogurt on the control board,
51
00:02:35,447 --> 00:02:39,409
and you kept referring to Jerry
with the identity crisis as Jeff.
52
00:02:45,415 --> 00:02:47,167
- You say my brother called?
- Mm-hm.
53
00:02:53,256 --> 00:02:55,091
So I said to the gardener, "Yoshi,
54
00:02:55,092 --> 00:02:57,510
I do not want a Zen garden
in my back yard.
55
00:02:57,511 --> 00:03:00,346
If I want to rake gravel every ten minutes
to maintain my inner harmony,
56
00:03:00,347 --> 00:03:01,807
I'll move to Yokohama."
57
00:03:03,433 --> 00:03:06,477
Well, this offends him so he starts
pulling up Maris' prized camellias
58
00:03:06,478 --> 00:03:07,395
by the handful.
59
00:03:07,396 --> 00:03:09,105
Well, I couldn't stand for that,
60
00:03:09,106 --> 00:03:13,151
so I marched right into the morning room
and locked the door till he cooled down.
61
00:03:15,445 --> 00:03:17,698
Tell me you would have
handled it differently.
62
00:03:19,032 --> 00:03:21,660
Oh, I'm sorry, Niles.
I didn't realize you'd stopped talking.
63
00:03:23,036 --> 00:03:24,370
You haven't heard a word I said.
64
00:03:24,371 --> 00:03:25,579
Niles, you're a psychiatrist.
65
00:03:25,580 --> 00:03:28,082
You know what it's like
to listen to people prattling on endlessly
66
00:03:28,083 --> 00:03:29,418
about their mundane lives.
67
00:03:30,460 --> 00:03:31,544
Touché.
68
00:03:31,545 --> 00:03:34,005
And on that subject,
I heard your show today.
69
00:03:39,720 --> 00:03:40,636
And?
70
00:03:40,637 --> 00:03:42,638
You know what
I think about pop psychiatry.
71
00:03:42,639 --> 00:03:45,015
Yes, I know what
you think about everything.
72
00:03:45,016 --> 00:03:47,685
When was the last time
you had an unexpressed thought?
73
00:03:47,686 --> 00:03:49,187
I'm having one now.
74
00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:53,859
- You guys ready?
- Two café lattes supremos.
75
00:04:02,659 --> 00:04:03,535
No, thank you.
76
00:04:06,079 --> 00:04:08,790
So, Frasier, how you doing on your own?
77
00:04:09,875 --> 00:04:10,834
I'm fine.
78
00:04:11,668 --> 00:04:12,711
I love my new life.
79
00:04:13,295 --> 00:04:15,129
I love the solitude.
80
00:04:15,130 --> 00:04:17,089
I miss Fredrick like
the dickens, of course.
81
00:04:17,090 --> 00:04:18,257
You know, he's quite a boy.
82
00:04:18,258 --> 00:04:21,136
He's playing goalie
on the pee-wee soccer team now.
83
00:04:21,762 --> 00:04:23,388
A chip off the old block.
84
00:04:24,181 --> 00:04:25,807
- You hated sports.
- So does he!
85
00:04:28,226 --> 00:04:30,228
Yeah, the fresh air's good for him.
86
00:04:31,271 --> 00:04:33,022
Oh, well, this has been fun, Frasier,
87
00:04:33,023 --> 00:04:37,027
but we have a problem
and that's why I thought we should talk.
88
00:04:37,778 --> 00:04:39,653
- Is it Dad?
- Afraid so.
89
00:04:39,654 --> 00:04:42,698
One of his old buddies from
the police force called this morning.
90
00:04:42,699 --> 00:04:45,201
He went over to see him
and found him on the bathroom floor.
91
00:04:45,202 --> 00:04:47,578
- Oh, my God.
- No, it's okay, he's fine.
92
00:04:47,579 --> 00:04:48,914
What, his hip again?
93
00:04:50,081 --> 00:04:52,751
Frasier, I don't think
he can live alone anymore.
94
00:04:54,211 --> 00:04:55,461
What can we do?
95
00:04:55,462 --> 00:04:59,924
Well, I know this isn't going
to be anyone's favorite solution but...
96
00:04:59,925 --> 00:05:03,427
I took the liberty of checking out
a few convalescent homes for him.
97
00:05:03,428 --> 00:05:05,971
Niles, a home? He's still a young man.
98
00:05:05,972 --> 00:05:07,932
Well, you certainly
can't take care of him.
99
00:05:07,933 --> 00:05:09,767
You're just getting
your new life together.
100
00:05:09,768 --> 00:05:13,188
Absolutely. Well, besides,
we were never simpatico.
101
00:05:13,814 --> 00:05:15,815
Of course, I can't take care of him.
102
00:05:15,816 --> 00:05:18,735
Oh, yes, yes, of course, of course. Why?
103
00:05:20,237 --> 00:05:22,614
- Because Dad doesn't get along with Maris.
- Who does?
104
00:05:23,990 --> 00:05:25,616
I thought you liked my Maris.
105
00:05:25,617 --> 00:05:28,453
I do, I... I like her from a distance.
106
00:05:29,287 --> 00:05:31,288
You know, the way you like the sun.
107
00:05:31,289 --> 00:05:34,000
Maris is like the sun,
except without the warmth.
108
00:05:39,714 --> 00:05:42,259
Well, then we're agreed
about what to do with Dad.
109
00:05:43,301 --> 00:05:44,761
"Golden Acres.
110
00:05:45,262 --> 00:05:46,930
We care so you don't have to."
111
00:05:52,894 --> 00:05:54,938
- It says that?
- Well, it might as well.
112
00:05:57,983 --> 00:06:00,192
All right, I'll make up the spare bedroom.
113
00:06:00,193 --> 00:06:01,902
Oh, you're a good son, Frasier.
114
00:06:01,903 --> 00:06:03,530
Oh, God, I am, aren't I?
115
00:06:04,865 --> 00:06:07,325
Two café supremos. Anything to eat?
116
00:06:08,076 --> 00:06:10,494
No, I seem to have lost my appetite.
117
00:06:10,495 --> 00:06:12,706
I'll have a large piece of cheesecake.
118
00:06:46,990 --> 00:06:47,991
Hi!
119
00:06:49,159 --> 00:06:50,243
We finally made it.
120
00:06:50,619 --> 00:06:53,288
Ah, Dad, Dad, welcome to your new home.
121
00:06:55,040 --> 00:06:56,457
Gee, you look great.
122
00:06:56,458 --> 00:06:58,543
Don't B.S. me. I do not look great.
123
00:06:59,210 --> 00:07:01,211
I spent Monday on the bathroom floor.
124
00:07:01,212 --> 00:07:03,506
You can still see
the tile marks on my face.
125
00:07:05,467 --> 00:07:07,969
Gives you some idea
about the ride over in the car.
126
00:07:08,970 --> 00:07:10,347
Well, uh, here we are.
127
00:07:11,932 --> 00:07:15,935
Rest assured the refrigerator is stocked
with your favorite beer, Ballantine,
128
00:07:15,936 --> 00:07:19,229
and we've got plenty
of hot links and coleslaw.
129
00:07:19,230 --> 00:07:22,066
I just rented
a Charles Bronson movie for later.
130
00:07:22,067 --> 00:07:24,068
Let's cut the
"Welcome to Camp Crane" speech.
131
00:07:24,069 --> 00:07:25,235
We know why I'm here.
132
00:07:25,236 --> 00:07:28,405
Your old man can't be left alone for
ten minutes without falling on his ass,
133
00:07:28,406 --> 00:07:30,158
and Frasier got stuck with me.
Isn't that right?
134
00:07:31,618 --> 00:07:32,827
No, no!
135
00:07:34,871 --> 00:07:37,957
I want you here. It'll give us
a chance to get reacquainted.
136
00:07:37,958 --> 00:07:40,293
That implies we were acquainted
at one point.
137
00:07:45,590 --> 00:07:49,218
Well, ahem.
Listen, why don't I take Dad's things
138
00:07:49,219 --> 00:07:50,844
into his new bachelor quarters
139
00:07:50,845 --> 00:07:53,056
so you two scoundrels
can plan some hijinks?
140
00:07:55,892 --> 00:07:58,186
I think that wife of his
is driving him Nutso.
141
00:07:58,812 --> 00:08:00,605
Yes, we Crane boys...
142
00:08:01,564 --> 00:08:02,857
sure know how to marry.
143
00:08:06,903 --> 00:08:08,571
Let me get you a beer, Dad.
144
00:08:09,698 --> 00:08:13,033
So, what do you think
of what I've done with the place, huh?
145
00:08:13,034 --> 00:08:15,536
You know, every item here
was carefully selected.
146
00:08:15,537 --> 00:08:16,829
This lamp by Corbu.
147
00:08:16,830 --> 00:08:18,247
The chair by Eames.
148
00:08:18,248 --> 00:08:23,836
And this couch is an exact replica of the
one Coco Chanel had in her Paris atelier.
149
00:08:23,837 --> 00:08:25,295
Nothing matches.
150
00:08:25,296 --> 00:08:28,049
Well, it's a style of decorating.
It's called eclectic.
151
00:08:29,718 --> 00:08:31,093
Well, the theory behind it is...
152
00:08:31,094 --> 00:08:33,637
if you've got really
fine pieces of furniture,
153
00:08:33,638 --> 00:08:36,558
it doesn't matter if they match.
They will go together.
154
00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:38,476
It's your money.
155
00:08:42,772 --> 00:08:45,691
Dad, what do you think of that view?
Hey, that's the Space Needle there.
156
00:08:45,692 --> 00:08:47,109
Oh, thanks of pointing that out.
157
00:08:47,110 --> 00:08:49,195
Being born and raised here,
I never would've known.
158
00:08:53,074 --> 00:08:54,450
Delivery for Martin Crane.
159
00:08:54,451 --> 00:08:56,160
- Oh, in here.
- Coming through.
160
00:08:56,161 --> 00:08:58,746
Excuse me. Excuse me! Wait a minute.
161
00:08:58,747 --> 00:09:01,040
- Where do you want it?
- Where's the TV?
162
00:09:01,041 --> 00:09:03,584
- It's in that credenza.
- Point it at that thing.
163
00:09:03,585 --> 00:09:04,835
What about this chair?
164
00:09:04,836 --> 00:09:06,628
The chair.
Let me get it out of your way.
165
00:09:06,629 --> 00:09:08,923
Niles be careful with that!
That's a Wassily!
166
00:09:10,467 --> 00:09:14,053
Oh, Dad, as dear as I'm sure
that this piece is to you,
167
00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:16,764
I just don't think
it goes with anything here.
168
00:09:16,765 --> 00:09:18,641
I know. It's eclectic.
169
00:09:22,479 --> 00:09:24,897
Niles. Niles, will you help me out here?
170
00:09:24,898 --> 00:09:26,815
You're gonna have
to run an extension cord over here
171
00:09:26,816 --> 00:09:28,817
so I can plug in the vibrating part.
172
00:09:28,818 --> 00:09:31,404
Oh, yes, yes,
that will be the crowning touch.
173
00:09:35,867 --> 00:09:38,994
Well, now that you two are settled in,
I've got to run.
174
00:09:38,995 --> 00:09:41,456
I'm late for
my dysfunctional family seminar.
175
00:09:43,208 --> 00:09:45,626
Dad, have you mentioned Eddie yet?
176
00:09:45,627 --> 00:09:47,629
- Eddie?
- Ta, ta.
177
00:09:48,379 --> 00:09:51,507
- No, Dad, no, no, not Eddie.
- But he's my best friend.
178
00:09:51,508 --> 00:09:53,802
- Get me my beer, will you?
- But he's weird.
179
00:09:55,053 --> 00:09:57,930
He gives me the creeps.
All he does is stare at me.
180
00:09:57,931 --> 00:09:59,598
Ah, it's just your imagination.
181
00:09:59,599 --> 00:10:02,810
No, Dad, no. No, I'm sorry.
But I am putting my foot down.
182
00:10:02,811 --> 00:10:04,187
Eddie is not moving in here.
183
00:10:27,627 --> 00:10:29,670
Oh, Niles, there you are.
184
00:10:29,671 --> 00:10:30,838
I'm sorry I'm late.
185
00:10:30,839 --> 00:10:34,676
Just as I was leaving, Dad decided to cook
lunch by the glow of a small kitchen fire.
186
00:10:35,885 --> 00:10:38,220
Oh, Niles, this last week with Dad,
187
00:10:38,221 --> 00:10:39,555
it's been a living hell.
188
00:10:39,556 --> 00:10:41,807
When I'm there, I feel like
my territory's being violated.
189
00:10:41,808 --> 00:10:43,851
When I'm not,
I'm worried about what he's up to.
190
00:10:43,852 --> 00:10:45,853
Look at me, I'm a nervous wreck!
191
00:10:45,854 --> 00:10:48,606
I've gotta do something to calm down.
Double espresso, please.
192
00:10:49,691 --> 00:10:53,986
Niles, you don't still have the brochures
for those... those rest homes, do you?
193
00:10:53,987 --> 00:10:55,070
Of course I do.
194
00:10:55,071 --> 00:10:57,532
Don't forget,
Maris is five years older than I am.
195
00:11:01,619 --> 00:11:03,705
But do you really think that's necessary?
196
00:11:03,997 --> 00:11:04,998
I'm afraid I do.
197
00:11:05,748 --> 00:11:07,666
I don't have my life anymore.
198
00:11:07,667 --> 00:11:09,751
Tuesday night,
I gave up my tickets to the theater.
199
00:11:09,752 --> 00:11:11,170
Wednesday, it was the symphony.
200
00:11:11,171 --> 00:11:13,046
Weren't you going to the opera on Friday?
201
00:11:13,047 --> 00:11:14,465
- Yes, here.
- Thank you.
202
00:11:17,969 --> 00:11:23,223
Niles, you don't suppose there's
a chance that you and Maris could...
203
00:11:23,224 --> 00:11:26,518
Funny you should mention that.
Maris and I were just discussing this.
204
00:11:26,519 --> 00:11:29,229
We feel we should do more
to share the responsibility.
205
00:11:29,230 --> 00:11:30,523
Do you mean you'd take him in?
206
00:11:31,274 --> 00:11:32,192
Dear God, no.
207
00:11:34,527 --> 00:11:37,779
But we would be willing to help you
pay for a home-care worker.
208
00:11:37,780 --> 00:11:38,989
A what?
209
00:11:38,990 --> 00:11:41,992
Someone who cooks and cleans and
can help Dad with his physical therapy.
210
00:11:41,993 --> 00:11:43,620
These angels exist?
211
00:11:44,787 --> 00:11:45,787
I know of an agency.
212
00:11:45,788 --> 00:11:48,416
Let me arrange for them to send
a few people over to meet with you.
213
00:11:49,876 --> 00:11:52,794
Niles, I can't thank you enough.
214
00:11:52,795 --> 00:11:56,131
I feel this overwhelming urge to hug you.
215
00:11:56,132 --> 00:11:59,677
Remember what Mom always said,
"A handshake is as good as a hug."
216
00:12:01,638 --> 00:12:02,513
Wise woman.
217
00:12:04,057 --> 00:12:09,270
I have never been more impressed
with a human being in my life.
218
00:12:10,563 --> 00:12:12,398
Now what was wrong with that one?
219
00:12:13,900 --> 00:12:17,694
- She was casing the joint.
- Casing the joint.
220
00:12:17,695 --> 00:12:19,405
She spent two years with Mother Teresa.
221
00:12:21,032 --> 00:12:23,576
If I were Mother Teresa,
I'd check my jewelry box.
222
00:12:26,287 --> 00:12:28,622
Now this is the last one.
223
00:12:28,623 --> 00:12:31,417
Can you please try to keep an open mind?
224
00:12:32,460 --> 00:12:36,005
Oh, hello.
Caught me with me hand in the biscuit tin.
225
00:12:37,131 --> 00:12:39,383
I'm Daphne. Daphne Moon.
226
00:12:39,384 --> 00:12:41,176
- Frasier Crane. Please come in.
- Thank you.
227
00:12:41,177 --> 00:12:43,387
This is my father, Martin Crane.
228
00:12:43,388 --> 00:12:46,349
- Dad, this is Daphne Moon.
- Nice to meet you.
229
00:12:47,058 --> 00:12:48,601
Oh, and who might this be?
230
00:12:49,811 --> 00:12:50,687
That is Eddie.
231
00:12:55,608 --> 00:12:57,359
I call him Eddie Spaghetti.
232
00:12:57,360 --> 00:12:59,904
- Oh, he likes pasta?
- No, he has worms.
233
00:13:04,951 --> 00:13:05,952
Uh...
234
00:13:06,619 --> 00:13:08,203
Have a seat, Miss Moon.
235
00:13:08,204 --> 00:13:09,539
Daphne. Thank you.
236
00:13:11,374 --> 00:13:13,917
Oh, will you look at that?
237
00:13:13,918 --> 00:13:15,294
What a comfy chair.
238
00:13:15,295 --> 00:13:17,421
It's like I always say,
239
00:13:17,422 --> 00:13:20,132
start with a good piece
and replace the rest
240
00:13:20,133 --> 00:13:21,175
when you can afford it.
241
00:13:28,850 --> 00:13:30,475
Yes, well, uh,
242
00:13:30,476 --> 00:13:33,312
perhaps you should start
by telling us a little bit about yourself.
243
00:13:33,313 --> 00:13:36,523
Well, I'm originally
from Manchester, England.
244
00:13:36,524 --> 00:13:37,858
Did you hear that, Dad?
245
00:13:37,859 --> 00:13:40,445
I'm three feet away.
There's nothing wrong with my hearing.
246
00:13:43,281 --> 00:13:46,783
I've only been in the U.S.
for a few months.
247
00:13:46,784 --> 00:13:52,789
But I have quite an extensive background
in home care and physical therapy,
248
00:13:52,790 --> 00:13:55,084
as you can see from my résumé. I--
249
00:13:56,502 --> 00:13:58,462
You were a policeman, weren't you?
250
00:13:58,463 --> 00:13:59,464
Yeah. How'd you know?
251
00:14:00,256 --> 00:14:03,509
I must confess, I'm a bit psychic.
252
00:14:06,179 --> 00:14:10,849
It's nothing big.
Just little things I sense about people.
253
00:14:10,850 --> 00:14:12,976
It's not like I could pick the lottery.
254
00:14:12,977 --> 00:14:16,022
If I could, I wouldn't be talking
to the likes of you two now, would I?
255
00:14:18,191 --> 00:14:19,107
Yes.
256
00:14:19,108 --> 00:14:21,234
Perhaps I should describe
the duties around here.
257
00:14:21,235 --> 00:14:23,236
- You would be responsible for--
- Oh, wait a minute.
258
00:14:23,237 --> 00:14:25,447
I'm getting something on you.
259
00:14:25,448 --> 00:14:27,158
You're a florist.
260
00:14:30,078 --> 00:14:32,204
No, I'm a psychiatrist.
261
00:14:32,205 --> 00:14:33,915
Well, it comes and goes.
262
00:14:35,541 --> 00:14:39,003
Usually it's strongest
during my time of the month.
263
00:14:39,670 --> 00:14:42,632
Oh, I guess I let a little secret
out there, didn't I?
264
00:14:44,384 --> 00:14:45,676
It's safe with us.
265
00:14:47,762 --> 00:14:50,680
Well, Miss Moon, I think we've learned
just about all we need to know about you.
266
00:14:50,681 --> 00:14:52,392
And a dash extra.
267
00:14:55,144 --> 00:14:56,646
You're a dog, aren't you?
268
00:15:01,526 --> 00:15:04,152
Well, we'll be calling you Miss Moon.
269
00:15:04,153 --> 00:15:05,195
Why wait?
270
00:15:05,196 --> 00:15:07,072
- You got the job.
- Oh, wonderful!
271
00:15:07,073 --> 00:15:08,698
Oh, excuse me, excuse me.
272
00:15:08,699 --> 00:15:10,534
Aren't you forgetting something?
273
00:15:10,535 --> 00:15:12,702
Don't you think we should
talk about this in private?
274
00:15:12,703 --> 00:15:16,456
Oh, of course you should.
I completely understand.
275
00:15:16,457 --> 00:15:18,375
I'll just pop into the loo.
276
00:15:18,376 --> 00:15:20,585
- You do have one, don't you?
- Yes.
277
00:15:20,586 --> 00:15:22,296
Oh, I love America.
278
00:15:25,800 --> 00:15:27,592
What do you think you're doing?
279
00:15:27,593 --> 00:15:29,136
You wanted me to pick one, I picked one.
280
00:15:29,137 --> 00:15:30,846
But she's a kook. I don't like her.
281
00:15:30,847 --> 00:15:32,764
Well, what difference does it make to you?
282
00:15:32,765 --> 00:15:34,475
She's only gonna be here when you're not.
283
00:15:35,101 --> 00:15:37,311
Then... what's my problem?
284
00:15:38,438 --> 00:15:39,355
Daphne!
285
00:15:40,648 --> 00:15:43,400
- You've been retained.
- Oh, wonderful.
286
00:15:43,401 --> 00:15:45,026
I had a premonition.
287
00:15:45,027 --> 00:15:45,903
Quelle surprise.
288
00:15:48,406 --> 00:15:50,490
I'll move the things in tomorrow.
289
00:15:50,491 --> 00:15:51,616
Oh, move in?
290
00:15:51,617 --> 00:15:53,660
Oh, I'm sorry.
There must be some misunderstanding.
291
00:15:53,661 --> 00:15:55,203
This isn't a live-in position.
292
00:15:55,204 --> 00:15:58,707
- Oh, dear. Well, the lady at the agency--
- The lady at the agency was wrong.
293
00:15:58,708 --> 00:16:00,208
This is just a part-time position.
294
00:16:00,209 --> 00:16:02,169
I'm afraid it just won't work out.
295
00:16:02,170 --> 00:16:04,463
Hold on there, Frasier!
Let's talk about this.
296
00:16:04,464 --> 00:16:06,006
Dad, there's nothing to discuss.
297
00:16:06,007 --> 00:16:07,716
You two should talk about this.
298
00:16:07,717 --> 00:16:11,846
So I'll just pop back in here and enjoy
some more of your African erotic art.
299
00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:15,557
Daphne, Daphne.
I think it would be best if you leave.
300
00:16:15,558 --> 00:16:17,018
Oh, well, all right, then.
301
00:16:17,810 --> 00:16:18,894
Don't be alarmed.
302
00:16:18,895 --> 00:16:20,520
We'll contact you...
303
00:16:20,521 --> 00:16:23,399
if not be telephone,
then through the toaster.
304
00:16:30,323 --> 00:16:32,908
I'm not having
another person living in this house.
305
00:16:32,909 --> 00:16:34,201
Give me one good reason why not?
306
00:16:34,202 --> 00:16:35,827
For one thing,
there's no room for her.
307
00:16:35,828 --> 00:16:37,454
What about that room
across from mine?
308
00:16:37,455 --> 00:16:39,539
My study?
You expect me to give up my study?
309
00:16:39,540 --> 00:16:41,958
The place where I read,
where I do my most profound thinking?
310
00:16:41,959 --> 00:16:44,420
Ah, use the can
like the rest of the world.
311
00:16:47,548 --> 00:16:48,715
You'll adjust.
312
00:16:48,716 --> 00:16:50,050
I don't want to adjust.
313
00:16:50,051 --> 00:16:51,510
I've done enough adjusting.
314
00:16:51,511 --> 00:16:53,637
I'm in a new city, I've got a new job.
315
00:16:53,638 --> 00:16:57,474
I'm separated from my little boy which
in itself is enough to drive me nuts.
316
00:16:57,475 --> 00:17:00,018
And now my father
and his dog are living with me.
317
00:17:00,019 --> 00:17:01,978
That's enough on my plate, thank you.
318
00:17:01,979 --> 00:17:04,564
The whole idea of getting somebody
in here was to help ease my burden,
319
00:17:04,565 --> 00:17:05,982
not to add to it.
320
00:17:05,983 --> 00:17:07,067
You hear that, Eddie?
321
00:17:07,068 --> 00:17:08,610
- We're a burden.
- Oh, Dad.
322
00:17:08,611 --> 00:17:12,573
Dad, you're twisting my words.
I meant burden in its most positive sense.
323
00:17:14,784 --> 00:17:16,953
As in "Gee, what a lovely burden"?
324
00:17:17,537 --> 00:17:19,538
Something like that. Yes.
325
00:17:19,539 --> 00:17:21,498
You're not the only one
who got screwed here.
326
00:17:21,499 --> 00:17:23,959
Two years ago I'm sailing
toward retirement and some punk
327
00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:26,545
robbing a convenience store
puts a bullet in my hip.
328
00:17:26,546 --> 00:17:29,422
Next, I'm trading in my golf clubs
for one of these.
329
00:17:29,423 --> 00:17:31,591
Well, I had plans too, you know.
330
00:17:31,592 --> 00:17:33,260
And this may come
as a shock to you,
331
00:17:33,261 --> 00:17:34,803
but one of them wasn't living with you.
332
00:17:34,804 --> 00:17:36,638
I'm just trying
to do the right thing here.
333
00:17:36,639 --> 00:17:38,974
- I'm trying to be the good son.
- Don't worry.
334
00:17:38,975 --> 00:17:42,310
After I'm gone, you can live guilt-free
knowing you've done right by your papa.
335
00:17:42,311 --> 00:17:43,937
You think this is all about guilt?
336
00:17:43,938 --> 00:17:45,897
- Isn't it?
- Of course it is.
337
00:17:45,898 --> 00:17:49,859
The point is I did it.
I took you in and I've got news for you.
338
00:17:49,860 --> 00:17:52,280
I wanted to do it
because you're my father.
339
00:17:53,614 --> 00:17:54,906
And how do you repay me?
340
00:17:54,907 --> 00:17:57,826
Ever since you moved in here,
it's been a snide comment about this
341
00:17:57,827 --> 00:18:00,078
or a smart little put-down about that.
342
00:18:00,079 --> 00:18:01,955
I've done my best
to make a home here for you.
343
00:18:01,956 --> 00:18:06,668
And once, just once would
it have killed you to say thank you?
344
00:18:06,669 --> 00:18:08,254
One lousy thank you?
345
00:18:19,265 --> 00:18:21,350
Come on, Eddie,
it's past your dinnertime.
346
00:18:22,685 --> 00:18:23,811
I'm going out.
347
00:18:38,784 --> 00:18:41,412
They have got to move
the bathroom closer to the studio!
348
00:18:43,289 --> 00:18:45,749
We'll be right back
after these messages.
349
00:18:45,750 --> 00:18:47,293
Can't I put that on tape?
350
00:18:49,378 --> 00:18:50,630
What's eating you?
351
00:18:51,547 --> 00:18:54,342
Oh, I'm sorry.
It's just this thing with my father.
352
00:18:55,551 --> 00:18:57,135
This person he wants to hire.
353
00:18:57,136 --> 00:19:00,138
I thought I'd start my life
with a clean slate
354
00:19:00,139 --> 00:19:04,602
and I had a picture of what it was
gonna be like and then... I don't know.
355
00:19:05,728 --> 00:19:07,896
Ever heard of Lupe Velez?
356
00:19:07,897 --> 00:19:08,897
Who?
357
00:19:08,898 --> 00:19:10,024
Lupe Velez?
358
00:19:10,524 --> 00:19:11,984
The movie star in the '30s?
359
00:19:12,943 --> 00:19:15,570
Well, her career hit the skids.
360
00:19:15,571 --> 00:19:18,948
So she decided she'd make
one final stab at immortality.
361
00:19:18,949 --> 00:19:21,576
She figured if she couldn't
be remembered for her movies,
362
00:19:21,577 --> 00:19:23,745
she'd be remembered for the way she died.
363
00:19:23,746 --> 00:19:26,539
And all Lupe wanted was to be remembered.
364
00:19:26,540 --> 00:19:29,584
So she plans this lavish suicide.
365
00:19:29,585 --> 00:19:32,837
Flowers, candles,
silk sheets, white satin gown.
366
00:19:32,838 --> 00:19:34,798
Full hair and makeup... the works.
367
00:19:34,799 --> 00:19:36,800
She takes the overdose of pills,
368
00:19:36,801 --> 00:19:40,887
lays on the bed and imagines
how beautiful she's going to look
369
00:19:40,888 --> 00:19:43,349
on the front page of tomorrow's newspaper.
370
00:19:43,933 --> 00:19:47,977
Unfortunately, the pills don't set well
with the enchilada combo plate
371
00:19:47,978 --> 00:19:49,980
she sadly chose as her last meal.
372
00:19:52,191 --> 00:19:53,900
She stumbles to the bathroom,
373
00:19:53,901 --> 00:19:57,613
trips and goes head first into the toilet
and that's how they found her.
374
00:20:00,241 --> 00:20:02,576
Is there a reason
you're telling me this story?
375
00:20:03,369 --> 00:20:04,286
Yes.
376
00:20:04,704 --> 00:20:07,789
Even though things
may not happen like we planned,
377
00:20:07,790 --> 00:20:09,208
they can work out anyway.
378
00:20:10,793 --> 00:20:14,129
Remind me again how it worked for Lupe,
379
00:20:14,130 --> 00:20:16,257
last seen with her head in the toilet.
380
00:20:17,717 --> 00:20:19,677
All she wanted was to be remembered.
381
00:20:20,261 --> 00:20:22,012
Will you ever forget that story?
382
00:20:26,600 --> 00:20:27,435
We're back.
383
00:20:28,227 --> 00:20:29,937
Roz, who's our next caller?
384
00:20:30,604 --> 00:20:32,647
We have Martin on line one.
385
00:20:32,648 --> 00:20:34,608
He's having a problem with his son.
386
00:20:36,736 --> 00:20:39,529
Hello, Martin, this is Dr. Frasier Crane.
387
00:20:39,530 --> 00:20:42,324
- I'm listening.
- I'm a first time caller.
388
00:20:48,748 --> 00:20:50,291
Welcome to the show.
389
00:20:51,208 --> 00:20:52,751
How can I help you?
390
00:20:52,752 --> 00:20:55,588
I just moved in with my son and, uh...
391
00:20:56,756 --> 00:20:57,631
it ain't working.
392
00:20:58,758 --> 00:21:01,469
- There's a lot of tension between us.
- I can imagine.
393
00:21:02,178 --> 00:21:03,554
Why do you think that's so?
394
00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:08,767
I guess I didn't see he had
a whole new life planned for himself,
395
00:21:08,768 --> 00:21:10,977
and I kind of got in the way.
396
00:21:10,978 --> 00:21:13,022
Well, these things are a two-way street.
397
00:21:13,606 --> 00:21:16,399
Perhaps your son
wasn't sensitive enough to see
398
00:21:16,400 --> 00:21:19,360
how your life was changing.
399
00:21:19,361 --> 00:21:20,403
You got that right!
400
00:21:20,404 --> 00:21:22,323
I've been telling him that
ever since I got there!
401
00:21:24,533 --> 00:21:26,619
I'm sure he appreciated your candor.
402
00:21:27,453 --> 00:21:30,288
Maybe sometimes I ought
to just learn to keep my trap shut.
403
00:21:30,289 --> 00:21:31,916
That's good advice for us all.
404
00:21:35,211 --> 00:21:36,045
Anything else?
405
00:21:37,004 --> 00:21:40,800
I'm worried that my son doesn't know
I appreciate what he's done for me.
406
00:21:42,468 --> 00:21:43,843
Why don't you tell him?
407
00:21:43,844 --> 00:21:48,098
You know how it is with fathers and sons,
you have trouble saying that stuff.
408
00:21:49,266 --> 00:21:54,897
Well, if it helps, I suspect your son
already knows how you feel.
409
00:21:59,068 --> 00:22:01,402
- Is that all?
- Yeah, I guess that's it.
410
00:22:01,403 --> 00:22:02,696
Thank you, Dr. Crane.
411
00:22:03,364 --> 00:22:04,781
My pleasure, Martin.
412
00:22:04,782 --> 00:22:06,658
Did you hear what I said,
I said thank you!
413
00:22:06,659 --> 00:22:07,701
Yes, I heard.
414
00:22:14,208 --> 00:22:17,293
Uh, Dr. Crane we have Claire on line four.
415
00:22:17,294 --> 00:22:20,214
She's having a problem
getting over a relationship.
416
00:22:22,132 --> 00:22:23,884
Hello, Claire. I'm listening.
417
00:22:24,718 --> 00:22:29,640
I'm a... Well, I'm a mess.
418
00:22:30,558 --> 00:22:33,227
Eight months ago,
my boyfriend and I broke up,
419
00:22:33,853 --> 00:22:35,312
and I just can't get over it.
420
00:22:36,480 --> 00:22:38,022
The pain isn't going away.
421
00:22:38,023 --> 00:22:40,568
It's almost like
I'm in mourning for something.
422
00:22:41,151 --> 00:22:44,154
Claire, you are in mourning.
423
00:22:45,406 --> 00:22:47,908
But you're not mourning
the loss of your boyfriend.
424
00:22:48,742 --> 00:22:51,786
You're mourning the loss
of what you thought your life
425
00:22:51,787 --> 00:22:52,788
was going to be.
426
00:22:54,874 --> 00:22:55,708
Let it go.
427
00:22:56,792 --> 00:22:59,044
Things don't always
work out how you planned.
428
00:22:59,545 --> 00:23:01,338
That's not necessarily bad.
429
00:23:02,840 --> 00:23:04,842
Things have a way of working out anyway.
430
00:23:06,468 --> 00:23:08,888
Have you ever heard of Lupe Velez?
431
00:23:18,022 --> 00:23:22,693
♪ Hey, baby, I hear the blues a-callin'
Tossed salads and scrambled eggs ♪
432
00:23:23,777 --> 00:23:24,903
♪ Oh, my ♪
433
00:23:24,904 --> 00:23:26,946
♪ And maybe I seem a bit confused ♪
434
00:23:26,947 --> 00:23:29,908
♪ Well, maybe, but I got you pegged! ♪
435
00:23:29,909 --> 00:23:31,993
♪ Ha, ha, ha, ha ♪
436
00:23:31,994 --> 00:23:33,578
♪ But I don't know what to do ♪
437
00:23:33,579 --> 00:23:36,749
♪ With those tossed salads
And scrambled eggs ♪
438
00:23:37,917 --> 00:23:40,085
♪ They're callin' again ♪
439
00:23:40,628 --> 00:23:42,463
♪ Good night, Seattle, we love you ♪