1 00:00:10,677 --> 00:00:12,512 Dad, why aren't you dressed? It's 4:00 in the afternoon. 2 00:00:12,712 --> 00:00:14,247 Oh, I've been working nights. 3 00:00:14,247 --> 00:00:15,715 My body clock's off. 4 00:00:16,216 --> 00:00:17,784 I'm eating bacon and eggs at night, 5 00:00:18,284 --> 00:00:19,786 and drinking beer in the morning. 6 00:00:20,286 --> 00:00:21,588 That's what you always do. 7 00:00:21,588 --> 00:00:24,224 Yeah, but now I'm tired all the time. 8 00:00:24,224 --> 00:00:25,558 There must be some way 9 00:00:25,558 --> 00:00:28,061 to end this fight with your boss. 10 00:00:28,061 --> 00:00:29,396 What's the problem? 11 00:00:29,396 --> 00:00:32,232 Oh, he wants me to date his sister, and I won't do it, 12 00:00:32,232 --> 00:00:34,067 so he's put me on graveyard until I cave. 13 00:00:34,334 --> 00:00:35,402 He can't do that. 14 00:00:35,402 --> 00:00:36,669 Why don't you file a complaint? 15 00:00:36,669 --> 00:00:39,706 I'd just as soon keep it just between the two of us. 16 00:00:40,073 --> 00:00:41,574 I see. Is this woman really so repulsive 17 00:00:41,574 --> 00:00:43,643 that you're willing to sacrifice all your nights 18 00:00:43,643 --> 00:00:44,644 just to avoid a date with her? 19 00:00:45,078 --> 00:00:46,646 Well, let me put it this way: 20 00:00:47,147 --> 00:00:50,150 Years of chewing tobacco have discolored her tooth. 21 00:00:50,150 --> 00:00:51,017 (laughs) 22 00:00:53,319 --> 00:00:55,388 Someone left a book of one-liners 23 00:00:55,388 --> 00:00:56,589 in the Lost and Found. 24 00:00:58,158 --> 00:00:59,726 Hey, Fras, there's your friend again. 25 00:00:59,726 --> 00:01:01,227 MAN ( on TV ): ...have seen his top-rated show. 26 00:01:01,227 --> 00:01:03,596 Dr. Phil. Now meet Dr. Phil McGraw in person. 27 00:01:03,930 --> 00:01:05,999 I'll be talking about life strategies 28 00:01:05,999 --> 00:01:08,501 at the State Theater Friday through Sunday. 29 00:01:08,501 --> 00:01:10,804 Come join us. It might just change your life. 30 00:01:11,071 --> 00:01:13,406 Now, there's a doctor. 31 00:01:16,543 --> 00:01:18,778 I never knew you were friends with Dr. Phil. 32 00:01:18,778 --> 00:01:20,280 Some years back, we found ourselves 33 00:01:20,280 --> 00:01:24,284 running into each other at seminars and conferences. 34 00:01:24,284 --> 00:01:27,787 He's an excellent therapist. 35 00:01:27,787 --> 00:01:31,325 We had a bit of a clash over ethics. 36 00:01:31,758 --> 00:01:32,826 Oh, really? Mm-hmm. 37 00:01:32,826 --> 00:01:35,228 What did you do, sleep with a patient? 38 00:01:35,228 --> 00:01:37,130 Not my ethics. His. 39 00:01:37,630 --> 00:01:42,469 The man bilked me out of $200 in a card game. 40 00:01:42,469 --> 00:01:43,736 He did not bilk you. 41 00:01:43,736 --> 00:01:45,305 It's called a one-eyed jack. 42 00:01:45,305 --> 00:01:47,207 Oh, yes, yes, there is one eye. 43 00:01:47,207 --> 00:01:49,642 But the other eye is there by implication. 44 00:01:49,642 --> 00:01:52,645 Therefore, the hand should have been a do-over. 45 00:01:52,645 --> 00:01:55,849 And you can ask Niles about this, too. 46 00:01:55,849 --> 00:01:57,817 Far as I'm concerned, the man owes me $200. 47 00:01:58,251 --> 00:01:59,319 This guy's so cheap, 48 00:01:59,319 --> 00:02:01,821 he could squeeze a nickel till the buffalo chokes. 49 00:02:01,821 --> 00:02:02,722 (laughs) 50 00:02:07,560 --> 00:02:11,798 Dad, exactly how old is this book of one-liners? 51 00:02:11,798 --> 00:02:12,632 How old? 52 00:02:12,632 --> 00:02:14,634 You're asking me how old? 53 00:02:14,634 --> 00:02:17,003 Well, I'll tell you how old. 54 00:02:17,303 --> 00:02:19,639 1956. 55 00:02:23,743 --> 00:02:25,245 Oh, Frasier, Daphne told me 56 00:02:25,245 --> 00:02:27,313 all about Dr. Phil. Oh. 57 00:02:27,313 --> 00:02:30,183 I can't believe you know him. Well... 58 00:02:30,183 --> 00:02:31,918 You think you could get me in backstage? 59 00:02:32,218 --> 00:02:34,087 Roz, I really hadn't planned on seeing him. 60 00:02:34,087 --> 00:02:35,555 Oh. Jealous, huh? 61 00:02:35,555 --> 00:02:38,057 Oh, it's okay, I understand. 62 00:02:38,057 --> 00:02:40,059 I am most certainly not jealous. 63 00:02:40,059 --> 00:02:41,761 The man happens to owe me $200. 64 00:02:41,761 --> 00:02:43,096 Right. 65 00:02:43,096 --> 00:02:45,098 But you know who could help you 66 00:02:45,098 --> 00:02:46,533 with your jealousy? 67 00:02:46,900 --> 00:02:48,968 Dr. Phil. 68 00:02:51,304 --> 00:02:52,639 He'd be, like... 69 00:02:52,639 --> 00:02:56,643 "So your jealousy of me has taken over your life. 70 00:02:56,643 --> 00:02:59,045 How's that working for you?" 71 00:02:59,045 --> 00:03:00,947 Yes. 72 00:03:00,947 --> 00:03:02,448 And I'd be, like... 73 00:03:02,949 --> 00:03:05,785 "Fine. My money, sir." 74 00:03:05,785 --> 00:03:07,120 Oh, please? 75 00:03:07,120 --> 00:03:08,922 Please do it for me? Please? 76 00:03:08,922 --> 00:03:09,756 Well... 77 00:03:10,256 --> 00:03:11,758 all right, all right. 78 00:03:11,758 --> 00:03:13,117 Oh, thank you. 79 00:03:13,117 --> 00:03:14,294 All right, I'll see you at work. 80 00:03:14,761 --> 00:03:15,795 Yeah, okay. 81 00:03:15,795 --> 00:03:16,796 Here you go. Oh. 82 00:03:16,796 --> 00:03:19,299 I couldn't remember if you wanted it black or not, 83 00:03:19,299 --> 00:03:20,300 so I brought it both ways. 84 00:03:20,300 --> 00:03:22,302 Well, that's very thoughtful of you. 85 00:03:22,302 --> 00:03:23,236 Thank you. 86 00:03:23,603 --> 00:03:25,171 No, you might as well keep it. 87 00:03:25,171 --> 00:03:26,639 You're paying for both. 88 00:03:26,639 --> 00:03:28,107 Hello. 89 00:03:28,107 --> 00:03:30,109 Oh, hi, Daph. 90 00:03:30,109 --> 00:03:31,611 Niles. Hello. 91 00:03:31,611 --> 00:03:32,612 (gasps): Oh, Nile Mm-hmm? 92 00:03:33,112 --> 00:03:34,614 Look who's here. 93 00:03:34,614 --> 00:03:36,983 NILES: Oh, isn't that adorable? 94 00:03:36,983 --> 00:03:38,318 See this couple? 95 00:03:38,318 --> 00:03:39,819 We-we've seen them in the park a few times. 96 00:03:39,819 --> 00:03:40,820 They're so sweet together. 97 00:03:41,321 --> 00:03:43,223 We like to think they're us when we're older. 98 00:03:44,624 --> 00:03:45,959 Look how Old Niles 99 00:03:45,959 --> 00:03:48,828 still puts his jacket around Old Daphne's shoulders. 100 00:03:50,263 --> 00:03:52,932 Ooh! She's still a saucy little kitten. 101 00:03:53,166 --> 00:03:55,501 And I'll bet he still rolls overin the middle of the night... 102 00:03:55,501 --> 00:03:58,304 Yes, the picture is gotten. Thank you. 103 00:03:58,304 --> 00:04:02,308 Oh, look. I think I've found Old Frasier. 104 00:04:02,308 --> 00:04:04,110 Oh, yeah. 105 00:04:08,848 --> 00:04:10,350 I see. 106 00:04:10,350 --> 00:04:14,354 Well, I hope the two of you will understand if, in future, 107 00:04:14,354 --> 00:04:16,856 I choose to knit scarves only for myself. 108 00:04:16,856 --> 00:04:18,358 Come on, we were only joking. 109 00:04:18,358 --> 00:04:20,260 Yes, I know. It's all in good fun. 110 00:04:20,260 --> 00:04:22,161 Oh, Niles, I just remembered. I've got... 111 00:04:22,161 --> 00:04:25,031 Shut up! 112 00:04:25,031 --> 00:04:26,199 Excuse me? 113 00:04:26,199 --> 00:04:27,533 Shut up! 114 00:04:27,533 --> 00:04:29,302 We're trying to knit. 115 00:04:34,440 --> 00:04:36,709 (audience applauding) ROZ: Dr. Phil! 116 00:04:36,709 --> 00:04:37,910 Dr. Phil, over here! 117 00:04:38,177 --> 00:04:39,712 Roz, please! 118 00:04:39,712 --> 00:04:43,249 At least attempt to be cool 119 00:04:43,249 --> 00:04:45,151 Phil! Phil! 120 00:04:45,151 --> 00:04:47,887 Well, Frasier Crane, is that you? 121 00:04:48,221 --> 00:04:50,223 Most assuredly 122 00:04:50,623 --> 00:04:51,691 Oh, that's you all right. 123 00:04:51,691 --> 00:04:52,692 So how are you? 124 00:04:53,192 --> 00:04:54,694 I'm fine, I'm fine. How's Robin? 125 00:04:55,194 --> 00:04:56,696 She's great. Can you believe it? 126 00:04:56,696 --> 00:04:58,197 We're going on 27 years. 127 00:04:58,197 --> 00:04:59,565 Oh, congratulations. 128 00:04:59,565 --> 00:05:00,833 And how's Lilith? 129 00:05:00,833 --> 00:05:04,537 Well, we've been divorced now for ten years. 130 00:05:04,537 --> 00:05:07,240 Congratulations. 131 00:05:07,540 --> 00:05:09,575 Hi. I'm Roz Doyle. Oh, I'm sorry. Yes. 132 00:05:09,575 --> 00:05:10,576 I'm Frasier's producer. 133 00:05:11,077 --> 00:05:12,111 I just think you're wonderful. 134 00:05:12,111 --> 00:05:14,614 I think your show is great, and you're a truly wise man. 135 00:05:14,614 --> 00:05:17,085 Do you know Tom Hanks? 136 00:05:17,750 --> 00:05:19,752 Uh... no, but thanks for the compliment. 137 00:05:20,186 --> 00:05:21,754 Y'all come on through. 138 00:05:21,754 --> 00:05:23,256 Oh, thank you. Thanks. 139 00:05:23,256 --> 00:05:24,257 Come on. 140 00:05:24,757 --> 00:05:26,259 So, Frasier, how's your show? 141 00:05:26,259 --> 00:05:27,760 Oh, huge, thank you. 142 00:05:27,760 --> 00:05:30,029 We just added Spokane last year. 143 00:05:30,229 --> 00:05:32,265 And a station in Saint Paul 144 00:05:32,265 --> 00:05:35,768 has agreed to let me send them a tape. 145 00:05:35,768 --> 00:05:37,737 Can you believe, after all that time 146 00:05:37,737 --> 00:05:38,738 we spent in the seminars, 147 00:05:39,238 --> 00:05:41,174 that we both turned out to be broadcasters? 148 00:05:41,174 --> 00:05:44,110 Boy, those were some good times, weren't they? 149 00:05:44,110 --> 00:05:45,545 Oh, indeed they were. 150 00:05:45,912 --> 00:05:49,482 Although sometimes the fun and games... 151 00:05:49,482 --> 00:05:51,317 were lacking in fun. 152 00:05:51,551 --> 00:05:54,921 Are you still whining about that 200 bucks? 153 00:05:54,921 --> 00:05:56,756 Well, it's the principle of the thing... 154 00:05:56,756 --> 00:05:58,257 I tell you what, I tell you what. 155 00:05:58,257 --> 00:05:59,759 Why don't we just discuss it over dinner? 156 00:05:59,759 --> 00:06:01,027 Love to. Can't. 157 00:06:01,027 --> 00:06:03,796 I am so busy-- personal appearances, 158 00:06:03,796 --> 00:06:06,299 and book signings, and interviews-- 159 00:06:06,299 --> 00:06:09,769 I've got this agent that's got me going 25/8 160 00:06:09,769 --> 00:06:12,271 In fact, speak of the devil, here she comes 161 00:06:12,772 --> 00:06:14,273 Phil, darling! 162 00:06:14,273 --> 00:06:17,744 Oh! That was sensational! 163 00:06:18,144 --> 00:06:19,011 Bebe? 164 00:06:20,313 --> 00:06:21,681 Frasier! 165 00:06:23,516 --> 00:06:25,952 And Roz, too. 166 00:06:26,319 --> 00:06:27,720 You guys know each other? 167 00:06:27,987 --> 00:06:29,021 She's my agent. 168 00:06:29,021 --> 00:06:29,822 And she used to be mine. 169 00:06:30,156 --> 00:06:31,724 Phil, there's a swarm of reporters 170 00:06:31,724 --> 00:06:34,060 in your dressing room waiting to talk to you. 171 00:06:34,293 --> 00:06:36,329 I probably should be going, actually 172 00:06:36,329 --> 00:06:38,865 But, Roz, it was really nice to meet you. 173 00:06:38,865 --> 00:06:39,832 And Frasier, 174 00:06:39,832 --> 00:06:41,267 tell you what, let's do e-mail. 175 00:06:41,667 --> 00:06:42,602 Okay. 176 00:06:44,470 --> 00:06:46,239 Isn't he marvelous? 177 00:06:46,239 --> 00:06:47,507 He's a cowboy... 178 00:06:48,007 --> 00:06:51,010 wrapped in a genius, wrapped in a dream... 179 00:06:51,010 --> 00:06:54,013 wrapped in another cowboy. 180 00:06:54,013 --> 00:06:56,516 I cannot believe that I have 181 00:06:56,516 --> 00:06:58,518 the same agent as Dr. Phil! 182 00:06:58,518 --> 00:07:00,019 Actually, you don't. 183 00:07:00,019 --> 00:07:02,955 Somebody as big as Dr. Phil needs all of my attention, 184 00:07:02,955 --> 00:07:05,858 but rest assured, you are being handled ably 185 00:07:05,858 --> 00:07:08,828 by an agent in whom I have the utmost confidence. 186 00:07:08,828 --> 00:07:10,696 Who is it? 187 00:07:10,997 --> 00:07:12,999 I want to say Tim... 188 00:07:13,366 --> 00:07:14,934 I think I need to make a phone call. 189 00:07:14,934 --> 00:07:15,868 Yeah. 190 00:07:16,869 --> 00:07:18,871 So, Bebe... (chuckles) 191 00:07:18,871 --> 00:07:22,675 however did you land Dr. Phil? 192 00:07:22,875 --> 00:07:24,444 We met about a year ago 193 00:07:24,944 --> 00:07:27,280 at a charity donkey basketball game. 194 00:07:27,547 --> 00:07:30,082 Donkey basketball? 195 00:07:30,082 --> 00:07:31,551 Texas, darling. 196 00:07:31,551 --> 00:07:34,053 It's like the symphony to them 197 00:07:35,555 --> 00:07:36,889 Long story short, 198 00:07:37,156 --> 00:07:38,724 I gave him some advice 199 00:07:38,724 --> 00:07:40,993 and, finally, he hired me full-time. 200 00:07:41,227 --> 00:07:42,161 Well, congratulations. 201 00:07:42,161 --> 00:07:43,529 You can't imagine 202 00:07:43,529 --> 00:07:45,531 the connections I have these days. 203 00:07:45,531 --> 00:07:46,866 If only you and I had... 204 00:07:48,334 --> 00:07:50,903 Well... 205 00:07:51,404 --> 00:07:53,906 that's water under the bridge, I guess. 206 00:07:53,906 --> 00:07:55,908 It's fun catching up, but... 207 00:07:55,908 --> 00:07:57,910 Phil's interviewing stylists for the Emmys. 208 00:07:57,910 --> 00:07:59,378 Bye, Frasier. 209 00:08:03,382 --> 00:08:05,218 What a phony, huh? 210 00:08:06,552 --> 00:08:09,055 She used to be my phony. 211 00:08:12,992 --> 00:08:15,661 Dad, do you think I did the right thing changing agents? 212 00:08:15,661 --> 00:08:17,129 I mean the one I have now is fine, 213 00:08:17,129 --> 00:08:19,665 but after I've seen what Bebe's done for Phil, 214 00:08:19,665 --> 00:08:21,167 I can't help wondering 215 00:08:21,167 --> 00:08:23,603 if maybe I've denied myself access to a wider world. 216 00:08:26,739 --> 00:08:28,608 Dad, are you all right? 217 00:08:28,608 --> 00:08:29,942 Oh, I'm sorry. 218 00:08:29,942 --> 00:08:32,445 I... I haven't talked to anybody for a few days. 219 00:08:32,445 --> 00:08:34,947 It feels kind of strange. 220 00:08:34,947 --> 00:08:38,217 Even this is making me a little uncomfortable. 221 00:08:39,519 --> 00:08:42,021 Dad, you have got to stop with the graveyard shifts 222 00:08:42,021 --> 00:08:44,023 or you're going to start seeing apparitions. 223 00:08:44,023 --> 00:08:46,025 No, don't worry about me. I'm pretty tough. 224 00:08:46,025 --> 00:08:48,027 Listen, I'd love to stay here talking to you, 225 00:08:48,427 --> 00:08:50,930 but all this sunlight is making me dizzy. 226 00:08:50,930 --> 00:08:53,232 What, you don't like the sun? 227 00:08:53,232 --> 00:08:56,102 Us night-shift guys call it... 228 00:08:56,102 --> 00:08:57,803 "The Scare-Ball." 229 00:08:59,138 --> 00:09:02,141 (doorbell rings) 230 00:09:09,148 --> 00:09:10,483 Oh, Bebe. 231 00:09:10,483 --> 00:09:11,784 Hello, darling. 232 00:09:11,784 --> 00:09:14,587 I can across this old box of Frasier strategy memos, 233 00:09:14,820 --> 00:09:17,390 and I thought I'd bring them by to you. 234 00:09:17,390 --> 00:09:19,825 Gosh, I... I didn't realize there was so much. 235 00:09:19,825 --> 00:09:22,161 And you thought I didn't work hard. 236 00:09:22,461 --> 00:09:24,030 Now, now, there's no reason to take that tone. 237 00:09:24,030 --> 00:09:26,332 Things have certainly worked out for you, wouldn't you say? 238 00:09:26,332 --> 00:09:27,667 Too true. 239 00:09:27,667 --> 00:09:32,004 But... I can't be blamed for being a bit of a bitter Bebe. 240 00:09:32,004 --> 00:09:34,340 No one likes being tossed aside for a younger woman. 241 00:09:34,340 --> 00:09:35,841 Oh, Bebe, you know very well 242 00:09:35,841 --> 00:09:37,310 I only changed agents 243 00:09:37,310 --> 00:09:39,845 because you were ignoring me in favor of another client. 244 00:09:39,845 --> 00:09:41,347 I wasn't ignoring you, 245 00:09:41,347 --> 00:09:43,849 I was merely getting some much-needed critical distance 246 00:09:43,849 --> 00:09:46,719 for a final glorious Frasierian push! 247 00:09:48,888 --> 00:09:51,557 But let's not rehash the past. 248 00:09:51,857 --> 00:09:52,925 Agreed. 249 00:09:52,925 --> 00:09:54,927 We accomplished too much together 250 00:09:54,927 --> 00:09:57,330 to stop being friends now. 251 00:09:57,330 --> 00:09:59,198 True. 252 00:10:00,700 --> 00:10:02,201 Frasier... 253 00:10:02,201 --> 00:10:05,204 have you ever wondered what it would be like... 254 00:10:05,204 --> 00:10:07,707 if I could apply what I've learned... 255 00:10:08,207 --> 00:10:09,709 to you? 256 00:10:09,709 --> 00:10:12,178 Yes, I have. 257 00:10:12,178 --> 00:10:15,181 But it cannot be. 258 00:10:15,681 --> 00:10:16,616 Can it? 259 00:10:18,551 --> 00:10:20,553 Dangerous thoughts. 260 00:10:20,553 --> 00:10:22,555 You're a siren... 261 00:10:22,555 --> 00:10:24,957 luring me to the rocks. 262 00:10:24,957 --> 00:10:26,392 But I must resist, 263 00:10:26,392 --> 00:10:28,394 or you'll hurt me again. 264 00:10:28,394 --> 00:10:29,395 No, I'm no siren! 265 00:10:29,395 --> 00:10:31,731 I'm a man! A man with ambitions! 266 00:10:31,731 --> 00:10:33,566 Ambition! 267 00:10:33,566 --> 00:10:37,570 The word is candy to me. 268 00:10:37,570 --> 00:10:39,572 Damn you, devil man! 269 00:10:39,572 --> 00:10:42,074 I must go! 270 00:10:42,074 --> 00:10:44,076 I'm all confused and woozy! 271 00:10:44,076 --> 00:10:45,344 I understand! 272 00:10:45,344 --> 00:10:47,113 But what about me?! 273 00:10:47,113 --> 00:10:48,114 Very well. 274 00:10:48,614 --> 00:10:52,118 Be at my hotel tonight for dinner. 275 00:10:52,118 --> 00:10:57,456 Perhaps you'll show me just how serious you are. 276 00:11:06,799 --> 00:11:08,300 I think I've figured it out. 277 00:11:08,300 --> 00:11:09,802 Bebe wants to have sex with a human male 278 00:11:10,302 --> 00:11:11,804 to bring about the apocalypse. 279 00:11:14,206 --> 00:11:17,076 Perhaps. 280 00:11:17,076 --> 00:11:19,078 But here's my theory: 281 00:11:19,078 --> 00:11:22,448 Bebe's had a thing for me for years. Mm-hmm. 282 00:11:22,715 --> 00:11:24,283 This, coupled with the fact 283 00:11:24,283 --> 00:11:26,786 that control is an aphrodisiac for her, 284 00:11:26,786 --> 00:11:29,288 it's not surprising to find that she hopes 285 00:11:29,288 --> 00:11:34,927 to parlay her advantage into a sexual conquest. 286 00:11:34,927 --> 00:11:37,430 the promise of wealth and exposure 287 00:11:37,430 --> 00:11:38,698 lure you into her bed? 288 00:11:38,698 --> 00:11:40,466 It's not going to come to that 289 00:11:40,966 --> 00:11:42,368 It's all about the dance 290 00:11:43,669 --> 00:11:47,139 It's all about the possibility of sex-- the promise-- 291 00:11:47,139 --> 00:11:50,142 that's never delivered that keeps them tantalized. 292 00:11:50,643 --> 00:11:53,646 One only needs to know how not to cross the line. 293 00:11:53,646 --> 00:11:57,049 Excuse me, but didn't you sleep with her once? 294 00:11:58,451 --> 00:12:01,721 Yes. That's how I know where the line is. 295 00:12:05,091 --> 00:12:07,159 I almost feel sorry for her. 296 00:12:07,660 --> 00:12:09,662 Just another helpless woman 297 00:12:09,662 --> 00:12:12,631 suffering from an unslakable thirst... 298 00:12:13,099 --> 00:12:15,668 For Crane. for Crane. 299 00:12:19,171 --> 00:12:20,673 Still, I can't help thinking 300 00:12:20,673 --> 00:12:23,175 there's something Faustian about this whole thing. 301 00:12:23,676 --> 00:12:27,179 (chuckling): Faust was a moron. 302 00:12:27,179 --> 00:12:31,183 I'm going to be a star. 303 00:12:31,183 --> 00:12:33,152 Hi, Daph. 304 00:12:33,152 --> 00:12:34,186 Hello. 305 00:12:34,186 --> 00:12:35,688 A latte, please. 306 00:12:35,688 --> 00:12:36,689 Hello, darling. 307 00:12:36,689 --> 00:12:37,690 Hello. 308 00:12:37,690 --> 00:12:39,191 Did you see who's here? 309 00:12:39,191 --> 00:12:40,126 Yes. 310 00:12:41,861 --> 00:12:44,697 I wonder if you'll still be stirring my coffee like that 311 00:12:44,697 --> 00:12:46,599 when we're in our golden years. Yes. 312 00:12:46,599 --> 00:12:49,034 And I know that a touch from you then 313 00:12:49,034 --> 00:12:51,437 will be just as sweet as it is today. 314 00:12:51,437 --> 00:12:53,873 So this is where you've been going! 315 00:12:54,373 --> 00:12:56,876 And with this tramp from water aerobics! 316 00:12:58,344 --> 00:12:59,411 Who are you? 317 00:12:59,411 --> 00:13:00,412 I'm his wife. 318 00:13:00,412 --> 00:13:01,814 You're married? 319 00:13:01,814 --> 00:13:03,048 I can explain. 320 00:13:03,048 --> 00:13:04,884 Don't bother, you worm! 321 00:13:04,884 --> 00:13:08,888 You promised that was it the last time. 322 00:13:15,895 --> 00:13:18,397 (knocking on door) 323 00:13:18,397 --> 00:13:20,900 Frasier, come in. 324 00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:22,902 (distant choir singing) 325 00:13:22,902 --> 00:13:24,370 How did you know it was me? 326 00:13:24,370 --> 00:13:28,274 I felt a certain tingle in the knob. 327 00:13:28,574 --> 00:13:30,075 Indeed. 328 00:13:32,111 --> 00:13:35,581 Well, I see Phil has landed you 329 00:13:35,581 --> 00:13:37,583 in the lap of luxury. 330 00:13:37,583 --> 00:13:39,084 Yes, it's a lovely suite. 331 00:13:39,084 --> 00:13:41,086 Unfortunately, there's some sort 332 00:13:41,086 --> 00:13:43,022 of choir championship this weekend, 333 00:13:43,389 --> 00:13:45,758 and they practice at all hours. 334 00:13:46,058 --> 00:13:48,127 Is it Madrigal Madness already? 335 00:13:48,127 --> 00:13:51,030 I had no idea it was this close to Whitsun. 336 00:13:51,397 --> 00:13:53,432 Please, darling, sit. 337 00:13:53,432 --> 00:13:55,434 I'll pour the champagne. 338 00:13:55,434 --> 00:13:58,470 Well, I... I suppose a drop wouldn't hurt. 339 00:14:01,473 --> 00:14:03,976 So... have you given any thought 340 00:14:03,976 --> 00:14:05,811 to taking me on again? 341 00:14:05,811 --> 00:14:08,113 Yes, I have. 342 00:14:08,113 --> 00:14:12,418 And I have to say there's almost nothing I'd enjoy more. 343 00:14:12,618 --> 00:14:14,119 Wonderful. 344 00:14:14,119 --> 00:14:15,120 But first... 345 00:14:15,120 --> 00:14:19,191 let's talk about what I'd enjoy more. 346 00:14:20,492 --> 00:14:22,228 You want more than ten percent? 347 00:14:22,228 --> 00:14:23,629 I want you. 348 00:14:23,629 --> 00:14:26,131 And yes to the other thing. 349 00:14:28,801 --> 00:14:30,736 Gosh, Bebe... 350 00:14:31,070 --> 00:14:32,638 I'm-I'm terribly flattered. 351 00:14:32,638 --> 00:14:33,639 It-it's just that, um... 352 00:14:33,639 --> 00:14:35,140 Frasier. Hmm? 353 00:14:35,140 --> 00:14:38,143 A few years ago I let down my guard 354 00:14:38,143 --> 00:14:39,545 and succumbed to your advances. 355 00:14:39,545 --> 00:14:40,913 You seduced me. 356 00:14:41,280 --> 00:14:42,314 It changed me, Frasier. 357 00:14:42,815 --> 00:14:46,185 If I crave your touch again, you've only yourself to blame. 358 00:14:46,185 --> 00:14:48,754 I'm not going to say that you're not a beautiful woman. 359 00:14:48,954 --> 00:14:52,925 But is it wise for us to jump into a relationship? 360 00:14:52,925 --> 00:14:55,828 I'm only talking about having a little fun. 361 00:14:55,828 --> 00:14:59,832 After all, when I'm having fun, I'm happy. 362 00:14:59,832 --> 00:15:02,835 When I'm happy, I work harder. 363 00:15:03,335 --> 00:15:05,838 When I work harder, you become famous 364 00:15:05,838 --> 00:15:07,339 and rich and powerful. 365 00:15:07,840 --> 00:15:11,110 That's what you want, isn't it-- fame and power? 366 00:15:11,343 --> 00:15:13,913 Well, I... I like to think of it 367 00:15:13,913 --> 00:15:16,215 more as influence, really, but... 368 00:15:16,215 --> 00:15:19,852 I'll bet I can make you bigger than Dr. Phil. 369 00:15:20,152 --> 00:15:22,187 Is that running water I hear? 370 00:15:22,621 --> 00:15:25,658 Yes. I'm steaming the wrinkles out of a dress. 371 00:15:25,658 --> 00:15:28,627 Does it put you in mind of a tropic night... 372 00:15:31,030 --> 00:15:33,065 ...a moonlit stroll, 373 00:15:33,565 --> 00:15:36,068 the rhythmic lapping of waves 374 00:15:36,068 --> 00:15:38,037 against the shore? 375 00:15:38,037 --> 00:15:41,907 You know, if it's silk, the steam could damage it. 376 00:15:41,907 --> 00:15:44,221 Wait right here. 377 00:15:44,221 --> 00:15:46,879 . I'd better open a window 378 00:15:46,879 --> 00:15:48,347 Yes, darling. 379 00:15:48,347 --> 00:15:50,382 Let the night in 380 00:15:50,382 --> 00:15:53,719 while I slip into something a little more comfortable 381 00:15:53,719 --> 00:15:57,523 Well, if you want comfortable, how about that sweater ensemble 382 00:15:57,523 --> 00:16:00,025 I saw you in this morning? 383 00:16:00,025 --> 00:16:02,895 (choir singing ominous tune ) 384 00:16:04,730 --> 00:16:06,098 Bebe? 385 00:16:06,098 --> 00:16:07,900 Join me, Frasier. 386 00:16:07,900 --> 00:16:11,403 I'll make your dreams come true. 387 00:16:11,403 --> 00:16:16,742 But... at what cost? 388 00:16:16,976 --> 00:16:19,478 What I'm offering you is priceless. 389 00:16:19,845 --> 00:16:21,413 Come, Frasier. 390 00:16:21,413 --> 00:16:24,416 (ominous tune intensifies) 391 00:16:27,886 --> 00:16:29,221 FRASIER: I can't! 392 00:16:29,421 --> 00:16:31,991 (yelling) 393 00:16:31,991 --> 00:16:33,392 (shrieks) 394 00:16:38,197 --> 00:16:40,265 (sighs heavily) 395 00:16:49,108 --> 00:16:50,609 ( dings ) 396 00:16:57,282 --> 00:16:59,218 (chuckles softly) 397 00:17:04,423 --> 00:17:06,191 (whirring) 398 00:17:22,674 --> 00:17:25,644 (whirring) 399 00:17:32,651 --> 00:17:35,154 (imitates sizzling) 400 00:17:37,089 --> 00:17:40,659 Roger. You are go for liftoff. 401 00:17:40,659 --> 00:17:43,162 Godspeed, Martin Six. 402 00:17:50,669 --> 00:17:52,171 (microwave dings) 403 00:17:52,171 --> 00:17:53,539 Oh! 404 00:17:53,806 --> 00:17:55,340 Aah! 405 00:18:07,186 --> 00:18:09,688 What the hell's going on? 406 00:18:09,688 --> 00:18:10,656 Oh, geez. 407 00:18:11,190 --> 00:18:12,691 Just sort of a... 408 00:18:12,691 --> 00:18:15,194 a... minor accident here. 409 00:18:15,194 --> 00:18:16,695 But don't worry about it 410 00:18:16,695 --> 00:18:18,163 Everything's under control 411 00:18:26,705 --> 00:18:29,675 So, what time you want me to pick up your sister? 412 00:18:32,211 --> 00:18:34,680 Well, if it isn't the First Couple of radio. 413 00:18:34,680 --> 00:18:36,615 I knew I could find you here. 414 00:18:37,015 --> 00:18:39,084 Bebe, shouldn't you be in Los Angeles with Dr. Phil? 415 00:18:39,585 --> 00:18:40,552 That's up to you, Frasier. 416 00:18:40,552 --> 00:18:43,055 I don't understand. 417 00:18:43,055 --> 00:18:47,059 Well, after our. .. meeting last night 418 00:18:47,059 --> 00:18:49,027 I had to ask myself a very difficult question: 419 00:18:49,394 --> 00:18:52,464 Am I really that happy with Dr. Phil 420 00:18:52,464 --> 00:18:55,267 if I'm entertaining thoughts of returning to you? 421 00:18:55,267 --> 00:18:57,002 Are you saying you'll have me back? 422 00:18:57,002 --> 00:18:58,370 How could I refuse you? 423 00:18:58,370 --> 00:18:59,805 Dr. Phil has been amusing, 424 00:18:59,805 --> 00:19:02,207 but I need a project. 425 00:19:02,207 --> 00:19:03,976 I need a Frasier Crane. 426 00:19:03,976 --> 00:19:05,744 Well, that's... that's wonderful. 427 00:19:05,744 --> 00:19:08,647 Incidentally, Dr. Phil paid me 15%. 428 00:19:08,647 --> 00:19:10,549 Well, as will Dr. Frasier. 429 00:19:10,549 --> 00:19:12,551 I've just got one very difficult call 430 00:19:12,551 --> 00:19:14,052 to make to my agent. 431 00:19:14,052 --> 00:19:14,920 Already handled. 432 00:19:15,354 --> 00:19:16,922 I also took the liberty of calling Spokane. 433 00:19:16,922 --> 00:19:19,258 The terms of your deal there were worse than abysmal. 434 00:19:19,591 --> 00:19:21,460 Great. Great. You got me more money! 435 00:19:21,460 --> 00:19:23,262 No, they wouldn't budge, so you quit. 436 00:19:23,262 --> 00:19:25,697 You're no longer on in Spokane. Isn't that exciting? 437 00:19:26,064 --> 00:19:26,932 Wait a minute. 438 00:19:26,932 --> 00:19:28,200 That is a step backwards. 439 00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:30,903 All the better to get a running start. 440 00:19:30,903 --> 00:19:32,471 In my opinion, 441 00:19:32,471 --> 00:19:36,241 the future is firmly in front of us. 442 00:19:36,675 --> 00:19:37,743 Congratulations, Frasier. 443 00:19:37,743 --> 00:19:40,245 Oh, thank you, Bebe. Thank you so much. 444 00:19:40,245 --> 00:19:41,747 I'll call you tomorrow. 445 00:19:42,247 --> 00:19:43,115 I'll be waiting. 446 00:19:43,115 --> 00:19:44,950 Gosh! Roz, isn'’t that great news? 447 00:19:44,950 --> 00:19:47,452 I feel like a weight has been lifted from me. 448 00:19:47,452 --> 00:19:48,787 Oh, it's marvelous! 449 00:19:49,121 --> 00:19:51,690 She's charging you more money, and we just lost Spokane. 450 00:19:51,690 --> 00:19:56,461 Big picture: the future is firmly in front of me. 451 00:19:56,795 --> 00:19:59,264 Isn't the future always in front of you? 452 00:19:59,264 --> 00:20:03,135 Yes... but not firmly. 453 00:20:07,606 --> 00:20:08,540 Well, my little lamb 454 00:20:08,540 --> 00:20:10,609 has bleated his way back to me 455 00:20:12,778 --> 00:20:13,845 So my debt i 456 00:20:13,845 --> 00:20:15,847 We don't have to keep pretending you're my agent? 457 00:20:15,847 --> 00:20:17,316 We're square, darling. 458 00:20:17,816 --> 00:20:19,818 And maybe next time you gamble with Bebe... 459 00:20:19,818 --> 00:20:22,321 you'll pay your debts with cash. 460 00:20:22,321 --> 00:20:23,822 See, the problem is, 461 00:20:23,822 --> 00:20:25,824 my wife looks at the bank statements, 462 00:20:25,824 --> 00:20:28,827 and if she knew I was losing money playing cards, 463 00:20:28,827 --> 00:20:30,662 she would kill me. 464 00:20:30,662 --> 00:20:35,000 So, your wife doesn't know you play poker? 465 00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:37,502 I don't tell her everything. 466 00:20:37,502 --> 00:20:38,837 I see. 467 00:20:39,104 --> 00:20:42,975 And how's that working for you? 468 00:20:43,175 --> 00:20:45,544 Just deal the cards. 469 00:20:52,217 --> 00:20:54,052 ♪♪ Hey, baby, I hear the blues a-calling ♪ ♪ 470 00:20:54,219 --> 00:20:57,122 ♪♪ Tossed salads and scrambled eggs ♪♪ 471 00:20:57,122 --> 00:20:59,424 ♪♪ Mercy ♪♪ 472 00:20:59,424 --> 00:21:01,893 ♪♪ And maybe I seem a bit confused ♪♪ 473 00:21:01,893 --> 00:21:04,997 ♪♪ Yeah, maybe, but I got you pegged ♪♪ 474 00:21:05,430 --> 00:21:06,498 (laughs) 475 00:21:06,498 --> 00:21:08,367 ♪♪ But I don'’’t know what to do ♪♪ 476 00:21:08,367 --> 00:21:12,738 ♪♪ With those tossed salad s and scrambled eggs ♪♪ 477 00:21:13,238 --> 00:21:15,073 ♪♪ They'’’re calling again . ♪♪ 478 00:21:15,941 --> 00:21:18,944 Scrambled eggs all over my face. 479 00:21:18,944 --> 00:21:20,912 What is a boy to do? 480 00:21:23,081 --> 00:21:25,584 Good night, Seattle! We love you!