1 00:00:20,709 --> 00:00:23,169 -Mr. Moon? -You again. 2 00:00:23,378 --> 00:00:25,428 Didn't I toss you out of here last night? 3 00:00:25,547 --> 00:00:27,798 Six times. But if you'll just give me a minute to… 4 00:00:27,882 --> 00:00:31,177 Gentlemen, this lad has traveled all the way from America 5 00:00:31,343 --> 00:00:33,428 to reunite me with my wife. 6 00:00:33,595 --> 00:00:36,431 [ANGRY SHOUTING] 7 00:00:37,516 --> 00:00:38,725 NILES: Wait, wait, wait! 8 00:00:38,892 --> 00:00:41,519 You never gave me a chance to buy a round of drinks. 9 00:00:41,686 --> 00:00:43,771 [CHEERING] 10 00:00:45,648 --> 00:00:48,442 All right. The usual, Ray. 11 00:00:48,609 --> 00:00:51,236 Starting talking. You got one pint. 12 00:00:51,403 --> 00:00:54,823 Mr. Moon, a great man once wrote 13 00:00:54,990 --> 00:00:58,868 that the opposite of love is not hate, but indifference. 14 00:00:59,034 --> 00:01:01,203 Done. Get out. 15 00:01:01,370 --> 00:01:04,414 Mr. Moon, Mr. Moon, your wife… Your wife is miserable without you. 16 00:01:04,498 --> 00:01:07,625 You should give her another chance. After all, you were married 40 years. 17 00:01:07,709 --> 00:01:11,963 Forty years too long. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm late for work. 18 00:01:14,549 --> 00:01:20,012 Hello. Aren't you a pretty thing? Fancy a roll in the hay? 19 00:01:20,178 --> 00:01:22,890 Nobody talks to my woman that way. 20 00:01:23,056 --> 00:01:24,266 [GRUNTING] 21 00:01:24,432 --> 00:01:27,101 Let's go. 22 00:01:27,435 --> 00:01:30,146 [GROANING] 23 00:01:30,980 --> 00:01:33,147 Here's a tenner, Harry. Hope I didn't hurt you. 24 00:01:33,231 --> 00:01:34,982 All in the line of duty. Good luck to you. 25 00:01:35,066 --> 00:01:36,985 -She's a nice bit of skirt. -Ta. 26 00:01:39,571 --> 00:01:41,698 Same again, Ray. 27 00:01:45,200 --> 00:01:48,078 -Ooph. -What was that? 28 00:01:48,245 --> 00:01:50,289 My job. 29 00:01:50,456 --> 00:01:53,166 I let lads give me a thumping to impress their dates. 30 00:01:53,333 --> 00:01:56,168 I tell you, it's a cakewalk compared to being married to Gertrude. 31 00:01:56,252 --> 00:01:59,102 At least when these lads hit me, they hold something back. 32 00:01:59,796 --> 00:02:03,008 Well, you know, Mr. Moon, you wouldn't recognize your wife. 33 00:02:03,175 --> 00:02:05,475 -She's mellowed. -You're wasting your breath. 34 00:02:05,636 --> 00:02:07,887 All right, forget about your wife for a minute. 35 00:02:07,971 --> 00:02:10,723 Think about your daughter. She's heartbroken. 36 00:02:10,890 --> 00:02:12,808 -My Daphne? -Yes! Yes. 37 00:02:12,975 --> 00:02:15,394 This separation is tearing her apart. If… 38 00:02:15,561 --> 00:02:19,564 If you care about her, come back to Seattle with me and talk to your wife. 39 00:02:19,731 --> 00:02:21,181 If you don't patch things up, 40 00:02:21,316 --> 00:02:23,985 at least your only daughter will know you cared enough to try. 41 00:02:24,069 --> 00:02:27,196 Well, you know, I'd love to see my baby girl again. 42 00:02:27,363 --> 00:02:30,574 But I can't afford to travel across the Atlantic whenever I please. 43 00:02:30,658 --> 00:02:33,243 Oh, I would pay for the ticket, of course. 44 00:02:33,410 --> 00:02:37,622 I can't have you buying me a first-class ticket to America. 45 00:02:39,290 --> 00:02:42,043 -I insist. -All right. For Daphne. 46 00:02:42,210 --> 00:02:44,627 You know, you're lucky you caught me on a light workweek. 47 00:02:44,711 --> 00:02:48,256 Oh, here's my two o'clock now. 48 00:02:49,591 --> 00:02:54,720 Hello. Aren't you a pretty thing? 49 00:02:58,516 --> 00:03:00,768 -You mind if I join you, Roz? -Oh, please. 50 00:03:00,935 --> 00:03:03,019 You can help me kill some time. 51 00:03:03,186 --> 00:03:05,536 Roger's picking up his things from my apartment. 52 00:03:05,689 --> 00:03:08,107 -I don't want to run into him. -Ah, afraid you'll fight? 53 00:03:08,191 --> 00:03:10,943 Worse. I'm afraid we'll end up in bed. 54 00:03:11,110 --> 00:03:14,488 There's something about him that is irresistible. 55 00:03:15,614 --> 00:03:18,075 -I understand. -Trust me, you don't. 56 00:03:18,242 --> 00:03:22,537 Roger is the best lover I have ever been with. 57 00:03:24,455 --> 00:03:28,875 Oh, my God, what am I saying? You were great, too. 58 00:03:29,626 --> 00:03:32,003 -There's no need to do this. -It's just that I forgot. 59 00:03:32,087 --> 00:03:34,589 Well, technically, it wasn't really sex because it was you. 60 00:03:34,673 --> 00:03:36,550 But whatever it was, it was great. 61 00:03:36,717 --> 00:03:39,135 Roz, please, there's no need to discuss it. 62 00:03:39,301 --> 00:03:44,098 -I was one satisfied customer. -Glad to hear it. 63 00:03:44,306 --> 00:03:47,141 Oh, here, let's pretend that this comment card is about you. 64 00:03:47,225 --> 00:03:49,185 Roz, please, there is no need to do that. 65 00:03:49,269 --> 00:03:50,729 Oh, all right, if you insist. 66 00:03:50,895 --> 00:03:52,605 Just remember that it was late at night, 67 00:03:52,689 --> 00:03:55,315 and I am really more of a morning person. 68 00:03:56,650 --> 00:03:58,610 There you go. 69 00:03:59,987 --> 00:04:01,030 Let's see. 70 00:04:01,196 --> 00:04:02,656 [ROZ CHUCKLES] 71 00:04:03,656 --> 00:04:05,950 High marks for courtesy and neatness of appearance. 72 00:04:06,034 --> 00:04:07,702 -That's good. -Mm-hmm. 73 00:04:08,661 --> 00:04:10,871 You were served in a prompt and timely manner. 74 00:04:10,955 --> 00:04:12,581 Absolutely. 75 00:04:12,748 --> 00:04:16,793 Now, I see here that, um, you're not planning a return visit. 76 00:04:16,960 --> 00:04:19,560 Well, only because we agreed. I mean, as you can see, 77 00:04:19,713 --> 00:04:23,466 I will highly recommend you to friends and family members. 78 00:04:24,925 --> 00:04:27,303 Well, that's very kind of you, Roz. Thank you. 79 00:04:27,470 --> 00:04:29,262 Would you like me to fill one out for you? 80 00:04:29,346 --> 00:04:34,017 No. I think you made your opinion clear when you screamed, "Outstanding!" 81 00:04:38,855 --> 00:04:40,105 Oh. 82 00:04:40,272 --> 00:04:42,232 Well, thanks for a tour of your city, lads. 83 00:04:42,316 --> 00:04:44,109 -Now where's your loo? -Ah. 84 00:04:44,276 --> 00:04:47,945 I need to splash me boots. Oh. 85 00:04:48,654 --> 00:04:51,741 Just an expression. Or so I've chosen to believe. 86 00:04:55,161 --> 00:04:59,706 Niles, are you and Daphne planning on having children? 87 00:04:59,873 --> 00:05:03,293 -Someday. Why? -No reason. 88 00:05:05,003 --> 00:05:09,632 Now, all I have to do is stash Mr. Moon at my place, 89 00:05:09,799 --> 00:05:12,301 pick up Daphne and her mom at the airport. 90 00:05:12,468 --> 00:05:16,930 Then get them all together and lay the groundwork for a reconciliation. 91 00:05:18,473 --> 00:05:20,423 -Oh, hi, Dad. How was work? -Hi, guys. 92 00:05:20,517 --> 00:05:22,936 Oh, great. I finally busted that guy 93 00:05:23,102 --> 00:05:26,438 who was writing "Seymour Butz" on the sign-out sheets. 94 00:05:28,690 --> 00:05:31,360 -So who was it? -Senior Vice-President Butz. 95 00:05:31,527 --> 00:05:33,778 I'm on probation for a week. 96 00:05:39,075 --> 00:05:42,869 Good God. You American police are persistent. 97 00:05:43,036 --> 00:05:45,247 I suppose you'd be looking for this. 98 00:05:45,413 --> 00:05:48,708 -A Space Needle snow globe? -You see, I meant to pay for it. 99 00:05:48,875 --> 00:05:51,752 I put it in my pocket, and somewhere between there and the register, 100 00:05:51,836 --> 00:05:54,463 I forgot about it. Why don't you take it back? 101 00:05:54,630 --> 00:05:56,131 Mr. Moon, I think you're mistaken. 102 00:05:56,215 --> 00:05:58,549 This is our father. He… He works as a security guard. 103 00:05:58,633 --> 00:06:02,387 -Yeah, Marty Crane. How do you do? -Oh, ha, ha. Harold Moon. 104 00:06:02,554 --> 00:06:05,849 Oh, well, you did a terrific job bringing up your daughter. 105 00:06:06,057 --> 00:06:07,640 Oh, well, you know, you do your best. 106 00:06:07,724 --> 00:06:09,101 [LAUGHS] 107 00:06:09,268 --> 00:06:11,728 -I'll be needing that back then. -Oh. 108 00:06:12,396 --> 00:06:15,899 -Harry, let me get you a beer. -Oh, get a man a beer, 109 00:06:16,066 --> 00:06:17,859 he'll drink for five minutes. 110 00:06:18,025 --> 00:06:22,155 Teach him where they are, he drinks all day. 111 00:06:22,989 --> 00:06:25,615 Oh, uh, Dad, Dad, I need you to do me a favor. 112 00:06:25,824 --> 00:06:28,993 Mr. Moon is a bit reluctant about getting back together with his wife. 113 00:06:29,077 --> 00:06:31,246 Ha. Can you blame him? 114 00:06:31,413 --> 00:06:34,290 It occurs to me that there's no woman so attractive 115 00:06:34,456 --> 00:06:37,206 as the one that some other guy seems to be attracted to. 116 00:06:37,293 --> 00:06:38,419 -So… -No way. 117 00:06:38,586 --> 00:06:40,296 [NILES STAMMERS] 118 00:06:40,462 --> 00:06:42,006 It would mean a lot to Daphne. 119 00:06:42,173 --> 00:06:44,757 And… And it'll get Mrs. Moon out of the country. 120 00:06:46,467 --> 00:06:49,512 Well, if it means a lot to Daphne. 121 00:06:49,679 --> 00:06:52,764 Well, she's a hell of a woman, your Gertrude. 122 00:06:52,931 --> 00:06:55,642 I don't blame you for coming over here to fight for her. 123 00:06:55,726 --> 00:06:57,436 Really? 124 00:06:58,312 --> 00:07:01,731 -What's so great about her? -Oh, well, you know, ha, ha. 125 00:07:01,898 --> 00:07:05,276 I mean, uh, like I have to tell you. 126 00:07:05,651 --> 00:07:09,529 The whole package, heh. She's got, uh 127 00:07:09,696 --> 00:07:11,948 hair. 128 00:07:12,115 --> 00:07:14,910 Skin, uh, et cetera. 129 00:07:15,076 --> 00:07:18,913 -And she's a good little drinker. -Dad, Dad, Dad. Why, just last week, 130 00:07:19,079 --> 00:07:23,667 you were commenting on her twinkly eyes and her sunny smile. 131 00:07:23,834 --> 00:07:26,378 Definitely. Yes, I was. Ha, ha. 132 00:07:26,545 --> 00:07:31,633 Yeah, they sure don't make women like that in America. Come on, boy. 133 00:07:31,799 --> 00:07:36,053 Wait a minute. I think I know what's going on here. 134 00:07:36,220 --> 00:07:39,431 The dog, the cane. 135 00:07:40,974 --> 00:07:43,769 He's lost his vision, hasn't he? 136 00:07:49,357 --> 00:07:52,652 And then she drags me to another luau. 137 00:07:52,860 --> 00:07:56,154 Where I come from, you bury a dead pig because it's diseased, 138 00:07:56,321 --> 00:07:58,571 not because you're gonna dig it up and eat it. 139 00:07:59,574 --> 00:08:01,826 Yes, well, Hawaii's not for everyone. 140 00:08:02,993 --> 00:08:06,121 Things may be looking up. I have a surprise. 141 00:08:06,288 --> 00:08:08,457 Oh, a surprise. 142 00:08:08,624 --> 00:08:10,125 I hope not another trip, darling, 143 00:08:10,209 --> 00:08:12,877 or I might just have to kill you in your sleep. 144 00:08:13,086 --> 00:08:16,089 Niles, good news. Our feet are the same size. 145 00:08:16,256 --> 00:08:20,175 -Daddy. I knew you'd come! -Hello, Stilts. 146 00:08:20,384 --> 00:08:21,927 Oh, give your old dad a kiss. 147 00:08:22,094 --> 00:08:24,638 [LAUGHING, KISSING] 148 00:08:24,805 --> 00:08:27,641 Mum, look who's here, all the way from England. 149 00:08:27,808 --> 00:08:29,475 Hello, Gert. 150 00:08:30,142 --> 00:08:34,897 "Hello, Gert"? That's all you have to say for yourself? 151 00:08:35,064 --> 00:08:37,164 For 40 years I've been a good wife to you, 152 00:08:37,316 --> 00:08:39,943 raising your children and boiling your meals, 153 00:08:40,110 --> 00:08:42,487 and letting you work off your animal lusts, 154 00:08:42,654 --> 00:08:46,116 and all I get for my trouble is a cheery, "Hello, Gert"? 155 00:08:46,283 --> 00:08:48,993 Well, your fatal charm is not gonna work this time. 156 00:08:49,201 --> 00:08:53,330 So you can drag your sorry ass back to that barstool it normally sags over 157 00:08:53,497 --> 00:08:55,207 and leave me the hell alone! 158 00:08:57,917 --> 00:09:00,295 Thank you, Niles, that was a nice surprise. 159 00:09:03,256 --> 00:09:05,465 You're right. She has mellowed. 160 00:09:08,010 --> 00:09:11,054 See? And I'm… I'm sure if you just give her a little more time, 161 00:09:11,138 --> 00:09:14,015 -you'll work everything out. -I gave it my best shot. 162 00:09:14,181 --> 00:09:17,143 -I'm gonna go pack. -Daddy. 163 00:09:18,644 --> 00:09:22,480 I don't understand. He came all this way and he's just gonna give up? 164 00:09:22,647 --> 00:09:25,900 Well, actually, he didn't even want to come. 165 00:09:26,067 --> 00:09:30,738 I sort of flew to England and persuaded him. 166 00:09:31,864 --> 00:09:35,451 -You what? -I wanted to surprise you. 167 00:09:36,327 --> 00:09:38,954 How could you do this without talking to me first? 168 00:09:39,579 --> 00:09:41,414 That would've ruined the surprise. 169 00:09:41,956 --> 00:09:44,833 Niles, I could have flown to England and talked to him too. 170 00:09:44,917 --> 00:09:47,378 But I didn't because I know my parents. 171 00:09:47,545 --> 00:09:50,129 When they fight, they need time apart to miss each other. 172 00:09:50,213 --> 00:09:53,717 And you would have known that had you consulted me first. 173 00:09:54,760 --> 00:09:58,554 -HARRY: I'm off. -Uh, Mr. Moon, Mr. Moon, wait. 174 00:09:58,721 --> 00:10:00,973 Just… Just… Just stay one more day 175 00:10:01,140 --> 00:10:04,890 and spend a little more time with your daughter. I'll put you up in a hotel. 176 00:10:04,977 --> 00:10:09,147 I can't let you buy me a suite in a five-star hotel. 177 00:10:19,907 --> 00:10:22,450 -I'm sorry I yelled at you last night. -No, no, I'm sorry. 178 00:10:22,534 --> 00:10:25,119 I… I was thinking about it. You were absolutely right. 179 00:10:25,203 --> 00:10:27,803 Look… We are a team now, and bringing your dad back 180 00:10:27,955 --> 00:10:30,916 -should have been our joint decision. -Thanks for understanding. 181 00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:33,126 Anyway, what's done is done. 182 00:10:33,293 --> 00:10:35,044 Mum's taken her claws out of the ceiling, 183 00:10:35,128 --> 00:10:36,587 and Dad's headed back to England. 184 00:10:36,671 --> 00:10:39,341 Actually, I convinced him to stay another day. 185 00:10:39,508 --> 00:10:41,808 I thought I should tell you since we're a team. 186 00:10:42,343 --> 00:10:44,428 -You what? -Well, I thought you'd wanna 187 00:10:44,595 --> 00:10:46,138 spend more time with him. Plus, 188 00:10:46,222 --> 00:10:49,599 since they're both in the same city, we can get them together tonight. 189 00:10:49,683 --> 00:10:51,351 Or not. 190 00:10:51,559 --> 00:10:53,728 We're a team. 191 00:10:53,895 --> 00:10:55,980 It's totally up to you. 192 00:10:56,648 --> 00:11:00,025 I don't know. Maybe we should let them work it out for themselves. 193 00:11:00,234 --> 00:11:03,612 Yeah. Or, on the other hand, maybe our love will inspire them, 194 00:11:03,779 --> 00:11:07,199 and come October, they'll be dancing at our wedding. 195 00:11:07,408 --> 00:11:09,742 -That would be wonderful. -Oh, hi, guys. 196 00:11:09,909 --> 00:11:12,370 Hey, Frasier. Frasier, listen. Uh… 197 00:11:12,537 --> 00:11:14,997 Daphne and I are taking her parents out to dinner tonight. 198 00:11:15,081 --> 00:11:16,914 Can you get us a reservation at Chez Henri? 199 00:11:16,998 --> 00:11:18,375 Oh, Chez Henri. 200 00:11:18,542 --> 00:11:20,376 Niles, they're booked up months in advance. 201 00:11:20,460 --> 00:11:23,296 I know that I wouldn't get in, but I was hoping if I cloaked myself 202 00:11:23,380 --> 00:11:25,964 -in the mantle of your renown… -You know better than that. 203 00:11:26,048 --> 00:11:28,300 Niles, I am not susceptible to flattery. 204 00:11:28,467 --> 00:11:31,053 I know. You're the most grounded, down-to-earth person I know. 205 00:11:31,137 --> 00:11:33,222 Thank you. I'll make a call. 206 00:11:34,348 --> 00:11:37,142 -Hey, Daphne, Niles. Frasier. -Oh! Roz, Roz. 207 00:11:37,308 --> 00:11:41,396 Uh, listen, I wanted to talk to you about this. 208 00:11:41,563 --> 00:11:47,651 -Oh, my God. You still have that? -Yes, well, I was glancing at it. 209 00:11:48,193 --> 00:11:53,030 I couldn't help but notice that the overall score you gave me, 210 00:11:53,197 --> 00:11:57,452 out of a possible five cups of coffee, 211 00:11:57,618 --> 00:11:59,745 was a four. 212 00:11:59,954 --> 00:12:02,747 -Yeah. That's a good score. -It's… It's a fine score. 213 00:12:02,831 --> 00:12:05,375 But it occurs to me that this presents an opportunity for me 214 00:12:05,459 --> 00:12:09,962 to learn something about my performance that might benefit me. 215 00:12:10,171 --> 00:12:12,631 So, what might I have done 216 00:12:13,215 --> 00:12:16,677 to earn that elusive fifth cup? 217 00:12:18,137 --> 00:12:21,264 Oh, I'm a tough grader. No one's a five-cup per. 218 00:12:21,473 --> 00:12:27,103 Nevertheless, there is a theoretical fifth cup out there. 219 00:12:27,312 --> 00:12:31,398 Now, I'm going to put ego aside. This is strictly about self-improvement. 220 00:12:31,565 --> 00:12:35,944 My commitment to sexcellence, if you will. 221 00:12:36,986 --> 00:12:40,072 -You just lost a cup. -Oh, please, Roz. 222 00:12:41,657 --> 00:12:43,993 All right. Um… 223 00:12:44,160 --> 00:12:46,077 [CHUCKLES] 224 00:12:46,870 --> 00:12:48,997 You know that thing you did at the end? 225 00:12:49,164 --> 00:12:52,167 -At the very end? -Just before. 226 00:12:52,334 --> 00:12:56,212 -I know exactly what you mean. -I could have done without that. 227 00:12:58,172 --> 00:12:59,840 Really? 228 00:13:00,007 --> 00:13:03,176 You didn't like that? Hm. Well, maybe that's just your taste. 229 00:13:03,343 --> 00:13:04,802 -No. -Oh. 230 00:13:05,345 --> 00:13:07,596 Because I've received high kudos for that in the past. 231 00:13:07,680 --> 00:13:09,390 No, look, don't take it personally. 232 00:13:09,474 --> 00:13:11,559 It would have been impossible for either one of us 233 00:13:11,643 --> 00:13:14,269 to get a perfect score that night, given the circumstances. 234 00:13:14,353 --> 00:13:17,731 We were both tentative, more than a little vulnerable. 235 00:13:17,940 --> 00:13:20,567 -That's true. -And it was tough to concentrate 236 00:13:20,733 --> 00:13:23,903 with the TV blaring away in your dad's bedroom. 237 00:13:24,654 --> 00:13:25,947 I didn't hear that. 238 00:13:26,155 --> 00:13:29,283 Don't you remember? Sting was on Letterman. 239 00:13:32,452 --> 00:13:34,245 He was talking about the rain forest 240 00:13:34,329 --> 00:13:36,540 and the plight of the Yanomama Indians. 241 00:13:38,083 --> 00:13:39,750 It was really sad. 242 00:13:39,917 --> 00:13:43,837 I mean, the whole Orinoco River Valley is being forested into extinction. 243 00:13:45,839 --> 00:13:50,885 Well, I'm glad my woefully inadequate performance 244 00:13:51,052 --> 00:13:53,763 didn't distract you from your ecology lesson. 245 00:13:54,973 --> 00:13:58,183 Did Sting happen to mention anything about you shaving your legs? 246 00:14:00,561 --> 00:14:02,979 Because that's a rain forest that could use some pruning. 247 00:14:03,063 --> 00:14:04,273 Frasier! 248 00:14:04,439 --> 00:14:07,858 That is exactly why I didn't want to do… Forget it. 249 00:14:08,025 --> 00:14:10,069 Forget it. 250 00:14:16,866 --> 00:14:20,078 -You know, you're a very good kisser. -No, I'm not. 251 00:14:21,746 --> 00:14:24,790 -You are. I'm not. -Oh, yes, you are. 252 00:14:25,457 --> 00:14:28,377 -Do I need to fill out another card? -Oh, please. 253 00:14:29,920 --> 00:14:31,546 Would you? 254 00:14:31,713 --> 00:14:33,631 [LAUGHS] 255 00:14:34,215 --> 00:14:36,759 We have some magnificent specials this evening. 256 00:14:36,926 --> 00:14:41,471 Just so you know, Henri, I won't eat frogs, snails, slugs or eels. 257 00:14:41,638 --> 00:14:45,267 And don't try slipping them under the sauce. I'm on to you people. 258 00:14:46,268 --> 00:14:48,604 I shall, uh, repeat this to the chef, 259 00:14:48,770 --> 00:14:50,938 and I'm sure some other delightful surprise 260 00:14:51,105 --> 00:14:53,774 will find its way onto your plate. 261 00:14:55,526 --> 00:14:59,654 NILES: Isn't this lovely? Candlelight, romantic music. 262 00:14:59,863 --> 00:15:03,575 Ah. It must take you back to the days of your courtship. 263 00:15:03,742 --> 00:15:06,202 -Where did you two meet? -At a soccer riot. 264 00:15:06,369 --> 00:15:09,329 She stopped a Spanish bloke from smashing a chair over my head. 265 00:15:09,413 --> 00:15:12,416 He wasn't Spanish, he was Portuguese. 266 00:15:12,625 --> 00:15:15,876 -I believe he was Spanish. -Well, I believe I know the difference 267 00:15:15,960 --> 00:15:18,128 between a bloody Spaniard and a bloody Portuguese. 268 00:15:18,212 --> 00:15:22,216 Oh, okay. Okay, moving on. Um… 269 00:15:22,383 --> 00:15:25,260 -Your first date? -She had me over for dinner. 270 00:15:25,427 --> 00:15:28,722 Oh, do you remember, I cooked you bubble and squeak. 271 00:15:28,930 --> 00:15:32,225 And then we went out, got squiffy and half-starkers, 272 00:15:32,392 --> 00:15:33,934 and snogged behind the chippy. 273 00:15:34,101 --> 00:15:36,187 [ALL LAUGH] 274 00:15:36,354 --> 00:15:40,858 You lost me after the word "dinner," but the language of love is universal. 275 00:15:42,984 --> 00:15:45,069 Oh, listen, we had some good times back then, eh? 276 00:15:45,153 --> 00:15:47,238 Oh, you should have seen her, Daphne. 277 00:15:47,405 --> 00:15:50,033 -She was a real firecracker. -Oh. 278 00:15:51,283 --> 00:15:53,535 Maybe we should order some champagne. 279 00:15:53,744 --> 00:15:55,996 I brought a very special bottle. It's in the car. 280 00:15:56,080 --> 00:16:00,750 Um, you two, you just, uh, keep reminiscing. I'll be right back. 281 00:16:04,921 --> 00:16:07,048 Hello, lovely dog. 282 00:16:09,174 --> 00:16:10,676 Hey, hey, hey. 283 00:16:15,806 --> 00:16:17,807 -Hello. -Hello. 284 00:16:17,973 --> 00:16:19,892 [CAR ALARM BEEPS] 285 00:16:20,101 --> 00:16:22,478 -Bastard. Take that back. -I will not. 286 00:16:22,645 --> 00:16:24,730 -Mummy, Daddy, please. -What's going on? 287 00:16:24,897 --> 00:16:27,857 What happened to snogging behind the chippy? 288 00:16:28,024 --> 00:16:31,069 -Get out of my country. -I can't leave soon enough. 289 00:16:31,236 --> 00:16:32,404 [GROANS] 290 00:16:32,570 --> 00:16:35,406 -You're Martin Crane's problem now. -What? 291 00:16:35,614 --> 00:16:38,116 Did you think I wouldn't find out about your old fancy man? 292 00:16:38,200 --> 00:16:40,869 -He can't stop thinking about you. -That's because he knows 293 00:16:40,953 --> 00:16:44,414 -a good thing when he sees it. -He can't see anything! 294 00:16:45,206 --> 00:16:48,418 Take me home, Daphne. I've had enough of this horrid man. 295 00:16:48,626 --> 00:16:51,045 Oh, wait. Now that the lines of communication are open… 296 00:16:51,129 --> 00:16:53,171 Oh, leave it alone, Niles. Come on, Mum. 297 00:16:56,800 --> 00:17:00,637 No, Gertrude, I never said I had a thing for you. 298 00:17:00,804 --> 00:17:04,014 No, I'm not playing hard to get. 299 00:17:04,223 --> 00:17:09,311 Yes, I guess if I was playing hard to get I'd say that I wasn't, but I'm not. 300 00:17:09,979 --> 00:17:15,984 Henri, you… You can't ban me from your bistro. 301 00:17:16,151 --> 00:17:19,320 It's my chez away from Chez. 302 00:17:19,486 --> 00:17:21,071 But… 303 00:17:22,114 --> 00:17:26,034 -Very well. Goodbye, Henri. -Goodbye, Gertrude. 304 00:17:26,201 --> 00:17:27,244 [DOORBELL RINGS] 305 00:17:27,411 --> 00:17:31,831 Great. I cheated death in Korea for this. 306 00:17:34,167 --> 00:17:36,711 -Hello. -Hello. 307 00:17:36,919 --> 00:17:39,337 -I see word travels fast. -Is Daphne here? 308 00:17:39,546 --> 00:17:41,631 No, she's not back from taking her mother home yet. 309 00:17:41,715 --> 00:17:44,593 Oh, well, I was hoping to see her before I left. 310 00:17:44,760 --> 00:17:47,595 -I guess I'll leave her a note then. -Uh, Mr. Moon. 311 00:17:47,762 --> 00:17:50,062 I'm sorry I dragged you all the way to America. 312 00:17:50,181 --> 00:17:55,226 Oh, it wasn't all that bad. I got to see Daphne. And that hotel was brilliant. 313 00:17:55,769 --> 00:17:59,731 The towels were so fluffy, I could barely close my suitcase. 314 00:18:03,485 --> 00:18:08,238 -Niles, I'm sorry things didn't work out. -Well, we can't say you didn't try. 315 00:18:09,865 --> 00:18:13,242 -Hello. -Hello. 316 00:18:13,993 --> 00:18:17,497 Well, uh, Dad, uh, why don't we go to your bedroom? 317 00:18:17,663 --> 00:18:20,207 I wanna show you how to use your closed captioning on the TV 318 00:18:20,291 --> 00:18:22,375 so you don't have to have it on so loud at night. 319 00:18:22,459 --> 00:18:24,336 Yeah, sure. 320 00:18:25,045 --> 00:18:27,797 Your dad's here in your room. He's just leaving you a note. 321 00:18:27,881 --> 00:18:29,549 How's your mom? 322 00:18:29,716 --> 00:18:31,883 Apparently there's nothing left for her in England, 323 00:18:31,967 --> 00:18:35,221 so she's thinking about putting down roots here. 324 00:18:35,763 --> 00:18:37,890 Daphne, from the bottom of my heart… 325 00:18:38,057 --> 00:18:42,310 Niles, it's been a very trying day. Could we talk about this later? 326 00:18:42,477 --> 00:18:46,981 I'll drive Daddy to the airport. I'll move his suitcase to your car. 327 00:18:47,190 --> 00:18:51,151 There you are. Well, back to England then. 328 00:18:51,318 --> 00:18:54,696 Yes. No chance of you and Mum getting back together? 329 00:18:54,905 --> 00:18:57,114 Don't think so, love. Not this time. 330 00:18:57,323 --> 00:19:02,328 -Maybe if you give it another chance. -Daphne, I'm sorry. It's over. 331 00:19:02,495 --> 00:19:06,748 Has been for a long time. I mean, I've got no complaints. 332 00:19:06,915 --> 00:19:09,584 I got something wonderful out of it. You. 333 00:19:09,751 --> 00:19:11,169 [LAUGHS] 334 00:19:11,336 --> 00:19:14,839 Oh, Dad. If you didn't love each other, 335 00:19:15,005 --> 00:19:17,383 why did you stay together for 40 years? 336 00:19:17,550 --> 00:19:20,450 Through all the fighting and the screaming and the hitting? 337 00:19:20,594 --> 00:19:22,388 That was for you kids. 338 00:19:24,264 --> 00:19:26,599 I can't believe this is really happening. 339 00:19:26,766 --> 00:19:30,270 Maybe I'm naive, but I always thought love would save the day. 340 00:19:30,478 --> 00:19:32,645 Well, you know, we all think that when we're young, 341 00:19:32,729 --> 00:19:34,479 but then life beats us around a bit 342 00:19:34,565 --> 00:19:37,109 and you learn to dream a little smaller. 343 00:19:37,276 --> 00:19:40,362 So that's how it goes. Two people get married, 344 00:19:40,529 --> 00:19:44,031 they're together 40 years, and then all of a sudden it just ends. 345 00:19:44,240 --> 00:19:48,077 But it's different for you. I mean, you've found the right person. 346 00:19:48,286 --> 00:19:50,537 -You barely know him. -Well, all I know is 347 00:19:50,704 --> 00:19:53,623 I threw him out of my pub six times, and six times he marched back in 348 00:19:53,707 --> 00:19:55,249 and yammered my ear off until… 349 00:19:55,333 --> 00:19:57,126 Until I went back with him to America. 350 00:19:57,210 --> 00:20:02,047 All to make you happy. I never did anything like that for your mother. 351 00:20:02,256 --> 00:20:05,467 No, no. I tell you, Daphne, you've got a right one there. 352 00:20:05,634 --> 00:20:09,637 A good one, you know. And another thing, he's worth a bob or two. 353 00:20:10,430 --> 00:20:12,265 -Oh, Dad. -Ha, ha, sweetie. 354 00:20:12,432 --> 00:20:14,183 [LAUGHS] 355 00:20:14,684 --> 00:20:15,977 [KNOCKING ON DOOR] 356 00:20:17,978 --> 00:20:20,522 -I want to marry you. -I want to marry you. 357 00:20:20,689 --> 00:20:23,150 No, I want to marry you now. 358 00:20:23,358 --> 00:20:25,568 -As in now? -Yes. 359 00:20:25,985 --> 00:20:28,404 -Why? -Why? 360 00:20:28,571 --> 00:20:31,282 Because you'd do anything, 361 00:20:31,490 --> 00:20:35,201 even put up with my insane family, to make me happy. 362 00:20:35,368 --> 00:20:37,568 Because you'd travel halfway around the world 363 00:20:37,662 --> 00:20:41,708 to make my dreams come true, even the impossible ones. 364 00:20:41,875 --> 00:20:44,585 And because I can't spend one more second 365 00:20:44,752 --> 00:20:47,546 without being your wife, Niles Crane, 366 00:20:47,713 --> 00:20:49,340 because I adore you. 367 00:20:49,506 --> 00:20:50,841 [LAUGHS] 368 00:20:51,008 --> 00:20:54,010 But I thought you always wanted a big wedding. 369 00:20:54,218 --> 00:20:56,387 You want to make my dreams come true? 370 00:20:56,554 --> 00:20:58,890 This is my dream.