1
00:00:07,800 --> 00:00:08,800
[CLAPPING]

2
00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:10,500
Thank you. Thank you,
Brother Reynolds,

3
00:00:10,700 --> 00:00:11,800
for your inaugural ode.

4
00:00:11,900 --> 00:00:13,700
And may I congratulate you
on your ingenuity

5
00:00:13,900 --> 00:00:17,000
in rhyming "Sauvignon"
with "tie one on."

6
00:00:17,400 --> 00:00:18,500
Sir.

7
00:00:18,700 --> 00:00:20,900
And now,
as outgoing corkmaster,

8
00:00:21,100 --> 00:00:25,000
it is my privilege
to bestow the sash of office

9
00:00:25,300 --> 00:00:28,000
upon the newly-elected corkmaster.

10
00:00:28,200 --> 00:00:30,300
Which would be me.

11
00:00:30,500 --> 00:00:32,400
Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you for your support.

12
00:00:32,700 --> 00:00:34,800
It humbles me,
and I only hope to live up

13
00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:38,000
to the shining example
of my predecessor.

14
00:00:38,300 --> 00:00:39,600
[NILES LAUGHING]

15
00:00:39,900 --> 00:00:42,300
And, of course,
the example of my opponent,

16
00:00:42,600 --> 00:00:45,400
the other Brother Crane,
who so graciously conceded

17
00:00:45,800 --> 00:00:48,100
after that fourth recount. Uh...

18
00:00:48,500 --> 00:00:49,900
Is he here?

19
00:00:50,100 --> 00:00:52,400
I guess he's not.
Well, I'm sure he's with us in spirit.

20
00:00:52,800 --> 00:00:56,000
Uh, if you'll indulge me,
I've cobbled together a few remarks

21
00:00:56,200 --> 00:01:00,200
to express what this moment
means to me.

22
00:01:00,600 --> 00:01:05,300
I'm sorry. Don't start yet.
Oh, God. I'm terribly sorry I'm late.

23
00:01:05,600 --> 00:01:08,500
You know, it's just coming down
in buckets out there.

24
00:01:08,800 --> 00:01:10,700
- Hello, Frasier.
- Oh, hi.

25
00:01:11,000 --> 00:01:13,000
Just as the cork protects the wine,

26
00:01:13,300 --> 00:01:15,800
as corkmaster,
I hope to protect the wine club

27
00:01:16,100 --> 00:01:18,500
from the forces
of metaphorical oxidation.

28
00:01:18,900 --> 00:01:21,500
Oh, Lord, Niles, are you in the middle
of your inauguration speech?

29
00:01:21,800 --> 00:01:23,800
- I'm so sorry.
- That's all right. That's all right.

30
00:01:24,100 --> 00:01:26,300
It's just that I have an announcement
of my own to make.

31
00:01:26,600 --> 00:01:28,700
Yes, well, new business
is concluded, brother Crane.

32
00:01:29,000 --> 00:01:30,500
- I move we reopen new business.
- Second.

33
00:01:30,800 --> 00:01:32,000
- Denied.
FRASIER: Point of order.

34
00:01:32,100 --> 00:01:33,900
Once a motion's been seconded,
there's a vote.

35
00:01:34,200 --> 00:01:35,500
Just tell us your new business.

36
00:01:35,800 --> 00:01:37,700
To override procedure,
there must be a quorum.

37
00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:40,200
Very well. Move for a vote.

38
00:01:40,500 --> 00:01:41,500
- Second.
- All in favour?

39
00:01:41,700 --> 00:01:44,300
ALL: Aye.
- Motion carried. Make a note.

40
00:01:44,600 --> 00:01:47,100
- Noted, corkmaster.
NILES: Thank you.

41
00:01:47,700 --> 00:01:48,800
Proceed.

42
00:01:49,000 --> 00:01:52,400
I remember when we
used to come here to drink.

43
00:01:54,400 --> 00:01:56,600
- Go ahead.
- Corkmaster,

44
00:01:56,800 --> 00:01:58,500
members of the Wine Cabinet,

45
00:01:58,600 --> 00:02:02,400
esteemed brothers and sisters,
I come here tonight with a heavy heart.

46
00:02:02,800 --> 00:02:06,100
You see, I am resigning
from the wine club.

47
00:02:06,500 --> 00:02:08,100
- What?
REYNOLDS: Oh, no.

48
00:02:08,300 --> 00:02:11,300
This wouldn't have anything to do
with my winning the election, would it?

49
00:02:11,600 --> 00:02:14,100
No, no, of course not, Niles.
I couldn't be happier for you.

50
00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:16,500
You see, I've been afforded
a marvellous opportunity

51
00:02:16,700 --> 00:02:19,400
to pass on what I've learned here
to a much larger audience.

52
00:02:19,700 --> 00:02:20,800
Starting next week,

53
00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:25,900
I will be hosting a new feature
on KACL called <i>The Wine Corner</i>,

54
00:02:26,200 --> 00:02:29,000
just at the end of Gil Chesterton's
<i>Restaurant Beat.</i>

55
00:02:29,300 --> 00:02:30,700
[MURMURING]

56
00:02:32,700 --> 00:02:34,300
- Thank you.
- Can't you do both?

57
00:02:34,600 --> 00:02:36,900
Oh, well, no. Regrettably, no.

58
00:02:37,200 --> 00:02:39,500
You see, like this Camembert,

59
00:02:39,700 --> 00:02:44,300
I am at my most delicious
when I'm not spread too thin.

60
00:02:45,200 --> 00:02:47,400
But this isn't goodbye
by any stretch of the imagination.

61
00:02:47,700 --> 00:02:50,300
Please, I invite each and every
one of you to call into my show

62
00:02:50,500 --> 00:02:52,200
so that you can help me
get Seattle hooked

63
00:02:52,500 --> 00:02:54,600
on our sometimes whimsical,
always enlightened

64
00:02:54,900 --> 00:02:56,300
brand of discussion.

65
00:02:56,600 --> 00:02:59,100
But I've taken enough time
away from Niles.

66
00:02:59,300 --> 00:03:01,400
After all, this is his night.

67
00:03:01,700 --> 00:03:06,200
He has been elected corkmaster
of this fine club.

68
00:03:06,600 --> 00:03:07,600
Thank you, Frasier.

69
00:03:07,900 --> 00:03:10,600
I thought you were settling in
for a long farewell speech.

70
00:03:10,800 --> 00:03:12,000
- Second.
- All in favour?

71
00:03:12,200 --> 00:03:15,200
ALL: Aye.
- Well, if you insist.

72
00:03:16,200 --> 00:03:22,200
It was a short seven years ago,
on a night very much like this one,

73
00:03:22,700 --> 00:03:26,000
a man had a dream...

74
00:03:31,400 --> 00:03:33,700
[FOOTSTEPS]

75
00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:36,200
All right, Roz, now,
this is a very different kind of show

76
00:03:36,500 --> 00:03:38,700
we're gonna be doing,
so are you clear on the procedure?

77
00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:40,200
What's so hard?

78
00:03:40,400 --> 00:03:43,300
You talk for a while, I screen calls,
you answer them, I look interested...

79
00:03:43,600 --> 00:03:46,600
- Oh, I see the hard part.
- Oh, ha-ha, very funny.

80
00:03:46,800 --> 00:03:48,700
This is a list of the members
of the wine club.

81
00:03:48,900 --> 00:03:50,700
If any of these names
should happen to call,

82
00:03:50,900 --> 00:03:52,600
put them through,
and fasten your seat belt

83
00:03:52,900 --> 00:03:55,800
for an all-out, freewheeling
symposium.

84
00:03:56,000 --> 00:03:58,400
- Hey, there's my Renaissance man.
- Oh, Kenny.

85
00:03:58,700 --> 00:04:02,300
If you can't solve their problems
with therapy, solve them with drinking.

86
00:04:04,000 --> 00:04:06,300
Yes, well, let's just keep that
out of the ads, shall we?

87
00:04:06,600 --> 00:04:08,200
- Heh. Too late.
FRASIER: Oh.

88
00:04:09,400 --> 00:04:10,400
Kenny...

89
00:04:10,600 --> 00:04:13,400
And finally,
no review of Le Petit Oiseau

90
00:04:13,700 --> 00:04:16,600
would be complete
without a word about their décor.

91
00:04:17,200 --> 00:04:18,900
Hideous.

92
00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:22,600
I'll be back after these messages.

93
00:04:22,900 --> 00:04:24,900
[IN SING-SONG VOICE]
And we're out.

94
00:04:25,200 --> 00:04:26,300
Hi, Lance.

95
00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:28,100
Here's Frasier, and this is Roz.

96
00:04:28,400 --> 00:04:29,800
- She'll be producing the show.
- Hi.

97
00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:31,900
ROZ: Hi.
- Oh, my, isn't that interesting?

98
00:04:32,200 --> 00:04:34,700
Yes, well, Frasier wants me
to produce his segment of the show.

99
00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:38,200
We have to get the levels right to
accommodate the timbre of his voice.

100
00:04:38,600 --> 00:04:40,200
My, my, my,
isn't she the fuss-pot?

101
00:04:41,100 --> 00:04:42,300
Actually, it was my idea.

102
00:04:43,400 --> 00:04:45,900
[IN SING-SONG VOICE]
That's who I was talking about.

103
00:04:46,200 --> 00:04:49,400
Listen, Gil, I hope you don't mind
my doing this segment.

104
00:04:49,800 --> 00:04:52,400
Oh, perish the thought.
I'm ecstatic.

105
00:04:52,700 --> 00:04:53,800
As ecstatic as you would be

106
00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:56,900
if someone hijacked
the last 15 minutes of your show.

107
00:04:57,400 --> 00:05:00,000
Hey, Gil,
what is the deal with Lance?

108
00:05:00,300 --> 00:05:03,900
Oh, smitten already,
are we, Roz?

109
00:05:04,300 --> 00:05:07,100
Well, he's certainly catnip
to the ladies.

110
00:05:07,400 --> 00:05:10,000
No, that was... Really?

111
00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:14,000
Well, that's what he claims.

112
00:05:14,300 --> 00:05:16,400
Of course, I've never actually
seen him with a woman.

113
00:05:16,700 --> 00:05:19,600
Well, just between us, I've always
thought he went the other way.

114
00:05:20,600 --> 00:05:22,800
Which way would that be?

115
00:05:24,400 --> 00:05:26,200
[IN SING-SONG VOICE]
And we're back.

116
00:05:26,500 --> 00:05:29,500
Normally at this time, I'd be doing
my final segment on food

117
00:05:29,800 --> 00:05:33,400
for the calorie-conscious,
"All Things Light and Edible."

118
00:05:33,600 --> 00:05:35,800
But, apparently,
health is going to take a back seat

119
00:05:36,000 --> 00:05:39,800
to the random musings
of a radio psychiatrist on wine.

120
00:05:40,200 --> 00:05:41,200
So without further ado,

121
00:05:41,500 --> 00:05:45,400
I give you <i>The Wine Corner</i>,
with your host, Dr. Frasier Crane.

122
00:05:55,700 --> 00:05:59,000
Thank you, Gil,
for that gracious introduction.

123
00:05:59,300 --> 00:06:02,700
And hello to you, Seattle.
Welcome to <i>The Wine Corner.</i>

124
00:06:03,100 --> 00:06:05,300
I hope you're as excited
about this new programme as I am.

125
00:06:05,600 --> 00:06:10,700
I offer myself as Sherpa,
a guide, if you will,

126
00:06:11,100 --> 00:06:15,100
to lead you through the labyrinth
of vintages and wine lists,

127
00:06:15,500 --> 00:06:19,500
chateaus and bodegas,
and take you, hopefully,

128
00:06:19,900 --> 00:06:23,300
to a whole new level
of sophistication.

129
00:06:23,600 --> 00:06:25,300
In summary, Linda,

130
00:06:25,600 --> 00:06:29,500
the year listed on the bottle
is not an expiration date.

131
00:06:34,400 --> 00:06:39,900
So that wine from 1997
should be perfectly safe to drink.

132
00:06:42,400 --> 00:06:45,000
- Who else, Roz?
- We have ten seconds, Frasier.

133
00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:47,800
In that case, this is Frasier Crane

134
00:06:48,100 --> 00:06:51,800
reminding you that a great wine
is like a great woman,

135
00:06:52,000 --> 00:06:57,300
always intoxicating, ever surprising,
and only getting better with age.

136
00:06:58,200 --> 00:07:01,300
- Aw, do you really believe that?
- Oh, who cares, Roz?

137
00:07:01,600 --> 00:07:04,900
I stopped listening
to myself ten minutes ago.

138
00:07:05,300 --> 00:07:07,000
Are you sure no one
from the wine club called?

139
00:07:07,300 --> 00:07:10,600
I'm positive. Don't feel bad.
You got a lot of other callers.

140
00:07:10,900 --> 00:07:12,400
It's just that
I was hoping to provoke

141
00:07:12,700 --> 00:07:16,300
the same kind of spirited debates
we have at the wine club.

142
00:07:16,700 --> 00:07:19,200
No holds barred free-for-alls

143
00:07:19,400 --> 00:07:21,300
that sometimes go into
the wee hours of the night,

144
00:07:21,600 --> 00:07:24,500
and even spill out into the streets.

145
00:07:24,700 --> 00:07:28,800
Oh, Roz, we loved wine then.

146
00:07:30,700 --> 00:07:32,100
Huzzah, Frasier.

147
00:07:32,300 --> 00:07:36,000
I'm sure everyone who was listening
is hitting the bottle as we speak.

148
00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:40,900
Well, Lance and I
are going for a boys' night out.

149
00:07:41,200 --> 00:07:43,500
Lock up your daughters.

150
00:07:57,600 --> 00:07:59,600
[INHALES DEEPLY]

151
00:08:03,900 --> 00:08:04,900
[MUTTERING]

152
00:08:05,100 --> 00:08:08,700
Dad, tell me if you think this is too
subtle for my listening audience.

153
00:08:09,100 --> 00:08:12,400
"This delightful offering is infused
with the brooding,

154
00:08:12,700 --> 00:08:17,200
almost dangerous presence
of vanilla."

155
00:08:18,900 --> 00:08:20,100
No, it's not too subtle,

156
00:08:20,400 --> 00:08:23,700
unless you want them to know
what the hell you're talking about.

157
00:08:25,100 --> 00:08:27,400
What, you don't think it's clear
that I enjoyed the wine?

158
00:08:27,700 --> 00:08:30,600
I don't think it's clear
you're talking about wine.

159
00:08:31,100 --> 00:08:32,600
[DOORBELL RINGS]

160
00:08:33,300 --> 00:08:35,800
- Lord, that'll be the new therapist.
- Ah, lucky me.

161
00:08:36,100 --> 00:08:37,400
Oh, now, behave yourself, Dad.

162
00:08:37,700 --> 00:08:40,500
It's only until Daphne comes back.
You have no idea how difficult it is

163
00:08:40,800 --> 00:08:42,600
to find a therapist
that can also cook.

164
00:08:42,800 --> 00:08:44,300
- Her name is Frederica.
- Oh.

165
00:08:44,600 --> 00:08:46,100
Sounds German.
You know what that means.

166
00:08:46,400 --> 00:08:50,600
She was probably kicked off
the shot-put team for using steroids.

167
00:08:51,000 --> 00:08:53,500
Now, Dad, the Germans never threw
anybody off the team for that.

168
00:08:53,800 --> 00:08:54,900
[CHUCKLES]

169
00:08:56,100 --> 00:08:57,800
- Ah. Hello.
- Hi, I'm Frederica.

170
00:08:58,000 --> 00:09:00,200
Won't you come in?
Here, let me take your bag.

171
00:09:00,500 --> 00:09:03,100
I'm Dr. Frasier Crane,
and this is my father, Martin.

172
00:09:03,400 --> 00:09:05,700
- Here, let me take your coat.
- Pleasure to meet you.

173
00:09:06,500 --> 00:09:10,800
Listen, my father's been,
well, letting his exercises slide a bit.

174
00:09:11,200 --> 00:09:13,500
Oh, well, that's human nature,
Dr. Crane.

175
00:09:13,800 --> 00:09:16,700
People neglect their exercising
for many reasons:

176
00:09:17,000 --> 00:09:23,600
Holidays, travel, illness,
lack of time, death.

177
00:09:25,300 --> 00:09:28,500
And there's only one
of those excuses that I accept:

178
00:09:28,900 --> 00:09:30,100
It's holidays.

179
00:09:30,300 --> 00:09:32,300
[LAUGHING]

180
00:09:34,300 --> 00:09:38,000
- Ah, it's just your leg I'm pulling.
- Oh. Well, good one.

181
00:09:38,400 --> 00:09:41,300
I was worried that you were gonna
be one of those drill-sergeant types.

182
00:09:41,600 --> 00:09:43,200
You'll show me your exercise mat.

183
00:09:43,500 --> 00:09:45,100
That's my other leg
you're pulling, huh?

184
00:09:45,400 --> 00:09:46,800
Now!

185
00:09:55,900 --> 00:09:57,000
[SIGHS]

186
00:09:57,300 --> 00:09:59,000
Now, ahem...

187
00:10:01,900 --> 00:10:03,800
Ah, yes.

188
00:10:09,300 --> 00:10:10,800
[INHALES DEEPLY]

189
00:10:14,300 --> 00:10:17,400
"But discernable

190
00:10:17,700 --> 00:10:22,700
only to the educated palate

191
00:10:23,200 --> 00:10:29,100
is the hint of violets

192
00:10:29,400 --> 00:10:34,100
that lingers
like a haunting refrain."

193
00:10:34,600 --> 00:10:36,400
[MARTIN SCREAMS]

194
00:10:37,800 --> 00:10:39,700
Good Lord.

195
00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:42,500
Oh. Shame on you, Dr. Crane.

196
00:10:42,800 --> 00:10:45,100
You really should have kept him
at his exercises.

197
00:10:45,400 --> 00:10:46,900
- Is he all right?
- No, indeed.

198
00:10:47,200 --> 00:10:49,500
- He is shamefully out of shape.
- But I meant...

199
00:10:49,800 --> 00:10:52,100
But don't worry.
I got here just in time.

200
00:10:52,400 --> 00:10:56,400
I'll shape him up
or know the reason why.

201
00:10:57,000 --> 00:10:58,100
[PHONE RINGING]

202
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:08,300
Hello.

203
00:11:08,600 --> 00:11:11,300
Oh, yes, thank you for returning
my call, Brother Peabody.

204
00:11:11,500 --> 00:11:14,700
Yes, well, I was just wondering
how come none of the members

205
00:11:14,900 --> 00:11:17,700
have been calling
my wine show.

206
00:11:18,800 --> 00:11:20,300
No.

207
00:11:21,400 --> 00:11:24,600
Well, just because Niles
is corkmaster,

208
00:11:25,000 --> 00:11:27,000
it doesn't mean
he has the right to dictate

209
00:11:27,300 --> 00:11:30,400
whom you may and may not call.

210
00:11:30,600 --> 00:11:34,300
Good Lord,
the man is my own brother.

211
00:11:34,800 --> 00:11:38,300
How can someone turn his back
on his own flesh and blood?

212
00:11:38,600 --> 00:11:39,700
[MARTIN SCREAMING]

213
00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:42,500
Someone on the phone here!

214
00:11:47,100 --> 00:11:49,200
ALL:
Aye.

215
00:11:49,500 --> 00:11:52,200
It is so resolved.
Any other business?

216
00:11:54,600 --> 00:11:57,000
Ah. Former Brother Crane,
what are you doing here?

217
00:11:57,300 --> 00:11:58,900
You know very well.

218
00:11:59,200 --> 00:12:02,000
How dare you instruct the members
not to call into my radio show.

219
00:12:02,300 --> 00:12:05,600
I simply directed their attention
to law 10C

220
00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:08,700
which states that the club shall not,
through contract or deed,

221
00:12:09,000 --> 00:12:11,000
- endorse any commercial endeavour.
- Any commercial endeavour.

222
00:12:11,300 --> 00:12:13,000
Yes, you can hide
behind some flimsy by-law

223
00:12:13,200 --> 00:12:14,800
if you wish to
for as long as you like.

224
00:12:15,100 --> 00:12:17,900
We both know the subtext
behind this pretext, vindictiveness.

225
00:12:18,200 --> 00:12:20,600
- Oh. I've...
- In light of this abuse of power,

226
00:12:20,900 --> 00:12:23,700
I move that the corkmaster
be stripped of his title,

227
00:12:24,100 --> 00:12:26,500
and that some well-deserving
member be named in his stead.

228
00:12:26,700 --> 00:12:28,800
Oh. The motion fails
for lack of a second.

229
00:12:29,100 --> 00:12:32,200
- Second.
- Stop that. Motion denied.

230
00:12:32,400 --> 00:12:35,000
Point of order, a motion cannot
be denied that has been seconded.

231
00:12:35,300 --> 00:12:38,300
The chair doesn't recognise motions
from former members, ergo,

232
00:12:38,600 --> 00:12:40,700
there can be no second
to a motion that doesn't exist.

233
00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:44,300
I move whatever it takes
to get us to the bar.

234
00:12:44,900 --> 00:12:46,300
Second that.

235
00:12:46,900 --> 00:12:49,900
All right, the chair declares a state of
emergency and a five-minute recess.

236
00:12:50,200 --> 00:12:51,500
[BANGS GAVEL]

237
00:12:51,800 --> 00:12:54,700
I want you out of here. It's bad enough
you upstaged me the other night.

238
00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:56,100
I did no such thing.

239
00:12:56,300 --> 00:12:59,300
Oh, no, you could've picked any time
to announce your resignation,

240
00:12:59,600 --> 00:13:01,400
but you chose
my inauguration to do it.

241
00:13:01,600 --> 00:13:03,400
Nonsense, Niles.
Will you listen to yourself?

242
00:13:03,500 --> 00:13:05,700
- This is just a wine club.
- Just a wine club?

243
00:13:05,900 --> 00:13:08,500
That's not the platform
you campaigned on two years in a row.

244
00:13:08,800 --> 00:13:10,200
You can say anything
you want now,

245
00:13:10,400 --> 00:13:12,300
you know how important
this place is to me.

246
00:13:12,600 --> 00:13:14,800
Yes, and you know how important
my radio show is to me.

247
00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:16,600
Oh, well, I guess then we're even.

248
00:13:18,300 --> 00:13:20,100
So you admit it.

249
00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:23,600
You have dishonoured this club
with your selfishness.

250
00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:25,600
Yes, well,
at least I'm still in the club.

251
00:13:25,900 --> 00:13:28,600
You are a trespasser.
Sergeant at arms.

252
00:13:34,600 --> 00:13:38,300
Well, we can do this the easy way
or the hard way.

253
00:13:40,300 --> 00:13:43,000
All right, call off your henchman.

254
00:13:44,800 --> 00:13:47,100
All right, thank you.
Stand down, Brother Hefflewhite.

255
00:13:48,100 --> 00:13:50,800
I'm just trying to save you
from yourself, Niles.

256
00:13:51,100 --> 00:13:53,600
I see. Well, goodbye,
former brother.

257
00:13:54,600 --> 00:13:57,700
You took the words
right out of my mouth.

258
00:14:08,100 --> 00:14:10,700
- Hi, Dad.
- Hi.

259
00:14:17,600 --> 00:14:19,100
Anything good on TV tonight?

260
00:14:19,800 --> 00:14:21,000
I don't know. Why?

261
00:14:21,400 --> 00:14:25,400
Oh, got the night free.
Thought we might hang out together.

262
00:14:26,900 --> 00:14:29,400
Oh, that's nice.

263
00:14:30,500 --> 00:14:33,100
You know, I usually have Wine Club
on Wednesday nights.

264
00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:36,900
What do you usually do
Wednesday nights?

265
00:14:37,900 --> 00:14:43,100
Oh, just sit back,
uh, enjoy the silence.

266
00:14:46,600 --> 00:14:48,400
Sounds good.

267
00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:03,100
- Seven thirty.
- Mm.

268
00:15:07,100 --> 00:15:08,800
Wonder what they're doing
at the wine club.

269
00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:11,400
Oh, jeez.
You gonna do this all night?

270
00:15:11,800 --> 00:15:13,700
No, no, Dad, you're right. I'm sorry.

271
00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:17,300
It's just that I hate to see
a once-proud institution

272
00:15:17,700 --> 00:15:19,700
making so many foolish mistakes.

273
00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:23,500
Well, if it makes you feel any better,
the club will probably fail without you.

274
00:15:23,900 --> 00:15:27,100
It'll be no fun.
All the members will resign.

275
00:15:27,400 --> 00:15:32,000
This time next month they'll probably
have torn the building down.

276
00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:37,300
I never know
when you're being facetious.

277
00:15:38,300 --> 00:15:40,200
Yeah, you do.

278
00:15:42,900 --> 00:15:45,700
All right, all right,
let's talk about something else.

279
00:15:46,200 --> 00:15:48,200
- How was your physical therapy?
- Oh.

280
00:15:48,500 --> 00:15:51,300
It was the most painful afternoon
of my life.

281
00:15:51,800 --> 00:15:53,900
She did things to me.

282
00:15:54,700 --> 00:15:56,600
Bad things.

283
00:15:58,200 --> 00:16:00,400
Well, Dad, I suppose
we could look for another therapist.

284
00:16:00,700 --> 00:16:05,300
Oh, hold on a second.
Here, try this.

285
00:16:06,500 --> 00:16:08,300
[LAUGHING]

286
00:16:08,700 --> 00:16:11,500
My God.
Oh, that sauerbraten is ambrosia.

287
00:16:11,800 --> 00:16:16,200
Oh, and wait till you wash it down
with her papa's homemade lager.

288
00:16:17,100 --> 00:16:18,100
How is everything?

289
00:16:18,400 --> 00:16:20,700
Oh, gosh, Frederica,
I've never tasted anything so divine.

290
00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:22,100
Oh, yeah, you see, Dr. Crane,

291
00:16:22,300 --> 00:16:25,600
I don't believe that fitness depends
on starving yourself.

292
00:16:25,900 --> 00:16:29,000
The secret is exercise, hard work,
then good food,

293
00:16:29,200 --> 00:16:30,900
and lots of it
when you've earned it.

294
00:16:31,200 --> 00:16:33,500
- Oh...
- Well, this is fabulous food.

295
00:16:34,100 --> 00:16:36,600
You haven't earned it!

296
00:16:36,800 --> 00:16:38,900
[LAUGHING]

297
00:16:39,700 --> 00:16:42,000
FREDERICA:
That's just my way of having fun.

298
00:16:43,300 --> 00:16:46,800
Of course, you're welcome.
I'll get another plate.

299
00:16:47,200 --> 00:16:49,200
Thank you.

300
00:16:50,600 --> 00:16:52,500
We ought to get Niles over here,
you know.

301
00:16:52,700 --> 00:16:54,200
He'd love this stuff.

302
00:16:54,500 --> 00:16:57,000
Niles? Dad, I told you, Niles
is no longer welcome in this house.

303
00:16:57,300 --> 00:16:58,300
Thank you, Frederica.

304
00:16:58,600 --> 00:17:01,900
Oh, son, why don't you just
ask your brother to take you back?

305
00:17:03,300 --> 00:17:04,300
I did.

306
00:17:06,200 --> 00:17:08,100
I called him and I apologised.

307
00:17:08,400 --> 00:17:10,300
He would hear none of it.

308
00:17:10,600 --> 00:17:14,100
All he did was keep quoting rules
and by-laws.

309
00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:16,800
Just like when you were kids
with that fort.

310
00:17:17,000 --> 00:17:19,600
You were always making up
these big fancy rules

311
00:17:19,900 --> 00:17:22,800
and titles for yourself.
It always ended up in a fight.

312
00:17:23,100 --> 00:17:25,200
I didn't like it then,
and I don't like it now.

313
00:17:25,500 --> 00:17:27,600
All right, then,
we just won't talk about it.

314
00:17:27,900 --> 00:17:29,900
Besides,
I'm through with the wine club.

315
00:17:30,200 --> 00:17:32,300
Good. Why don't we
just enjoy our Wednesday?

316
00:17:32,600 --> 00:17:34,400
Second.

317
00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:37,000
All in favour?

318
00:17:37,700 --> 00:17:38,900
Aye.

319
00:17:39,200 --> 00:17:41,200
Motion carried.

320
00:17:45,700 --> 00:17:47,600
I'm done now.

321
00:17:49,600 --> 00:17:51,800
NILES:
Mm. Mm-hm, mm-hm.

322
00:17:52,400 --> 00:17:54,400
I'm getting oak
with plummy overtones.

323
00:17:54,700 --> 00:17:57,400
I'm getting screwed on alimony.

324
00:17:59,800 --> 00:18:01,600
Niles, I wanna talk to you.

325
00:18:01,800 --> 00:18:03,800
Dad? What happened?
Is there something wrong?

326
00:18:04,100 --> 00:18:07,000
You're damned right there is.
It's about you and Frasier.

327
00:18:07,400 --> 00:18:10,400
Good God, you wear a sash?

328
00:18:12,600 --> 00:18:14,000
Frasier sent you down here,
didn't he?

329
00:18:14,300 --> 00:18:17,900
FRASIER: No.
- Frasier, get in here, now.

330
00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:21,700
Dad, this isn't necessary.

331
00:18:22,000 --> 00:18:23,900
Yeah, we can talk about this
some other time.

332
00:18:24,100 --> 00:18:25,500
Zip it up, both of you.

333
00:18:25,800 --> 00:18:29,500
I just gave up the best meal of my life
to come down here, so listen up.

334
00:18:29,800 --> 00:18:32,800
Niles, let your brother play.

335
00:18:35,600 --> 00:18:36,700
Dad, this is not a game.

336
00:18:36,800 --> 00:18:38,600
This is a club,
and Frasier broke the rules.

337
00:18:38,800 --> 00:18:40,000
- Technically, I did...
- Zip!

338
00:18:40,400 --> 00:18:42,900
Well, then you write a new rule
so that Frasier can come back.

339
00:18:43,200 --> 00:18:44,900
- First, I want an apology.
- I said zip it.

340
00:18:45,200 --> 00:18:47,200
- He did. I heard him.
- Don't get smart.

341
00:18:47,700 --> 00:18:49,700
Now, are you gonna
let your brother play?

342
00:18:50,000 --> 00:18:52,400
- Dad, l... Why...?
- Are you gonna let your brother play?

343
00:18:52,700 --> 00:18:55,100
Are you gonna
let your brother play?

344
00:18:56,900 --> 00:18:57,900
Fine.

345
00:18:58,100 --> 00:19:00,600
Am I gonna have any more trouble
between you two?

346
00:19:01,700 --> 00:19:03,700
- No.
- No.

347
00:19:04,700 --> 00:19:05,900
No what?

348
00:19:06,400 --> 00:19:07,400
- No, sir.
- No, sir.

349
00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:10,300
Good. Now, shake hands.

350
00:19:11,900 --> 00:19:13,000
That's more like it.

351
00:19:13,300 --> 00:19:15,700
Now, you don't mind, I've got
a big plate of <i>Gewürzplätzchen</i>

352
00:19:15,900 --> 00:19:18,100
waiting for me at home
with my name on it.

353
00:19:22,000 --> 00:19:25,700
Ahem. Well, let's get back
to the wine, shall we?

354
00:19:26,100 --> 00:19:28,800
You got yelled at by your dad.

355
00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:31,200
[LAUGHING]

356
00:19:32,500 --> 00:19:35,200
- Well, be that as it may...
- Zip it.

357
00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:45,300
- Niles.
- Hello, Frasier.

358
00:19:45,500 --> 00:19:48,300
Thought we could drive over
to Wine Club together.

359
00:19:48,700 --> 00:19:50,700
Actually,
I'm thinking about not going.

360
00:19:51,200 --> 00:19:52,300
Why not?

361
00:19:52,500 --> 00:19:58,100
Niles, truth be told, my enthusiasm
for the wine club has started to turn.

362
00:19:58,600 --> 00:19:59,700
I know what you mean.

363
00:19:59,900 --> 00:20:03,700
It used to be the wine club,
now it's just the teasing-people club.

364
00:20:04,100 --> 00:20:05,400
Then let's not go.

365
00:20:05,700 --> 00:20:07,500
They'll put our names
in the absent bottle.

366
00:20:07,700 --> 00:20:10,100
We'll have to bring
the crackers next time.

367
00:20:10,600 --> 00:20:13,600
- What if there's no next time?
- What do you mean?

368
00:20:13,900 --> 00:20:17,100
Niles, those people
don't care about wine.

369
00:20:17,500 --> 00:20:18,600
Not the way you and I do, no.

370
00:20:18,700 --> 00:20:21,300
What's preventing us from starting
a whole new club from scratch?

371
00:20:21,600 --> 00:20:24,500
- We could really get back to basics.
- Something that's just about wine,

372
00:20:24,900 --> 00:20:27,400
and a clear constitutional procedure
for enjoying it.

373
00:20:27,700 --> 00:20:30,400
Yes, well, then maybe this time
the governing body could be bicameral.

374
00:20:30,600 --> 00:20:31,700
Well, I don't know, Niles.

375
00:20:31,900 --> 00:20:34,200
There is something to be said
for the parliamentary system.

376
00:20:34,500 --> 00:20:38,000
Well, either way, we have to have
a strong judiciary to keep it in check.

377
00:20:38,200 --> 00:20:40,500
God, I love wine.

378
00:20:49,600 --> 00:20:52,300
[INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]