1
00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:10,700
FRASIER:
Roz, to what do I owe the pleasure?

2
00:00:10,900 --> 00:00:12,900
A messenger delivered this for you
after you left.

3
00:00:13,200 --> 00:00:16,300
It's marked "personal and confidential."
I thought it might be important.

4
00:00:16,600 --> 00:00:18,200
I already tried that. Forget it.

5
00:00:18,400 --> 00:00:21,000
We could use
some brighter bulbs at the office.

6
00:00:21,400 --> 00:00:25,400
Yes, well, a brighter bulb
wouldn't have admitted it.

7
00:00:27,500 --> 00:00:30,100
Let's see.

8
00:00:30,300 --> 00:00:33,200
"Dear Dr. Crane, enclosed are four
tickets to tonight's Sonics game

9
00:00:33,600 --> 00:00:36,000
as thanks for your advice
on today's show.

10
00:00:36,300 --> 00:00:38,400
Sincerely, Alan from Earlmont."

11
00:00:38,700 --> 00:00:39,900
That is gonna be a great game.

12
00:00:40,100 --> 00:00:41,600
Take your dad,
have a boys' night out.

13
00:00:41,900 --> 00:00:43,800
Niles and I were already
having a boys' night out.

14
00:00:44,100 --> 00:00:46,700
We're gonna go see the Northwest
Chamber Ensemble's Spring Sing.

15
00:00:47,000 --> 00:00:49,100
After that,
a late dinner at Le Cigare Volant.

16
00:00:49,500 --> 00:00:50,600
Oh.

17
00:00:51,400 --> 00:00:54,900
Throw in a couple of strippers,
and that still sounds boring.

18
00:00:55,900 --> 00:00:58,200
To think I was gonna offer you
these basketball tickets.

19
00:00:58,500 --> 00:00:59,900
Well, can't use them anyway.

20
00:01:00,100 --> 00:01:03,500
I have a date with this French guy,
Jean-Pierre.

21
00:01:03,800 --> 00:01:07,600
So that's it, huh? No Americans left.

22
00:01:12,400 --> 00:01:14,000
Very funny.

23
00:01:14,300 --> 00:01:16,900
You know, I hope it goes well,
because he doesn't speak any English,

24
00:01:17,200 --> 00:01:19,000
and the only French I know
is <i>oui</i> and <i>non</i>.

25
00:01:19,300 --> 00:01:21,400
I suppose you'll just be using
one of those.

26
00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:23,400
Before you get too clever,

27
00:01:23,600 --> 00:01:26,200
you're the one
who's going out with his brother.

28
00:01:27,200 --> 00:01:28,900
Have a nice date, Roz.

29
00:01:31,400 --> 00:01:35,700
Dad, I've got something here
that I think you might be interested in.

30
00:01:36,200 --> 00:01:38,800
- Whoa! Sonics tickets?
- Yeah.

31
00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:40,100
How about that?

32
00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:42,900
- Looks like I owe you an apology.
- An apology?

33
00:01:43,300 --> 00:01:45,400
Last October, you said we would go
to a game together,

34
00:01:45,700 --> 00:01:47,300
but I thought
that was just a lot of talk.

35
00:01:47,400 --> 00:01:50,400
- Listen, Dad, I intended to...
- It doesn't matter how long it took.

36
00:01:50,800 --> 00:01:53,700
You came through.
That's what's important.

37
00:01:54,400 --> 00:01:56,300
- Glad to see you so excited.
- Who wouldn't be?

38
00:01:56,600 --> 00:02:00,700
Look where we're sitting.
Frasier, you're the best.

39
00:02:01,100 --> 00:02:03,400
Listen, Dad,
there's something you should know.

40
00:02:08,100 --> 00:02:11,100
- You're paying for the snacks.
- All right.

41
00:02:11,400 --> 00:02:14,600
Well, we better get going.
Who are the other two tickets for?

42
00:02:14,900 --> 00:02:16,100
[DOORBELL RINGS]

43
00:02:16,300 --> 00:02:18,900
Well, they're for Niles and Daphne,
of course.

44
00:02:19,100 --> 00:02:20,700
But I made the arrangements
so long ago,

45
00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:23,600
I didn't anticipate Daphne
going for her master's degree

46
00:02:23,900 --> 00:02:25,600
at the fat academy.

47
00:02:27,300 --> 00:02:29,000
You know, Dad,

48
00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:31,800
why don't I let Niles in and
then you can go get ready, all right?

49
00:02:32,100 --> 00:02:33,700
I am ready.

50
00:02:34,800 --> 00:02:36,400
Don't you wanna take
your big foam finger?

51
00:02:36,700 --> 00:02:39,700
No, I got some
nacho cheese on it last time.

52
00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:41,600
It smells kind of funky.

53
00:02:43,100 --> 00:02:44,100
[DOORBELL RINGS]

54
00:02:44,400 --> 00:02:46,400
This is gonna be fun.

55
00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:50,000
Oh, hi. For a moment,
I thought you'd left.

56
00:02:50,200 --> 00:02:53,100
- You got the tickets?
- Right here! We're good to go.

57
00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:57,100
- Dad's going with us?
- Yes, all three of us.

58
00:02:57,300 --> 00:02:58,600
Well, we'd better get a move on.

59
00:02:58,900 --> 00:03:00,900
I like to get there early,
see the players warm up.

60
00:03:01,100 --> 00:03:05,100
Hey, me too. What a surprise this is.

61
00:03:05,400 --> 00:03:09,000
Yes. Just you wait.

62
00:03:13,700 --> 00:03:15,000
[CROWD CHATTERING
INDISTINCTLY]

63
00:03:15,200 --> 00:03:17,200
FRASIER:
Here we are, Row 4.

64
00:03:17,500 --> 00:03:19,900
Tell you what,
why don't we let Dad sit between us?

65
00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:21,600
- There we are.
- That's a good idea.

66
00:03:21,800 --> 00:03:26,300
ANNOUNCER: <i>Now entering the game</i>
<i>for the Sonics, number 31, Rick Barry.</i>

67
00:03:26,700 --> 00:03:29,400
This is like those family road trips
that Dad used to drag us on.

68
00:03:29,700 --> 00:03:35,600
Uncomfortable seats, sticky floors,
underlying threat of violence.

69
00:03:37,100 --> 00:03:38,900
How ever did we get through those?

70
00:03:39,100 --> 00:03:40,600
- Games, mostly.
- Ah.

71
00:03:40,900 --> 00:03:45,000
Licence-plate spotting,
I Spy, throwing up.

72
00:03:45,700 --> 00:03:48,300
No, Niles, that wasn't
so much a game as an activity.

73
00:03:48,600 --> 00:03:49,900
[CROWD CHEERING]

74
00:03:50,200 --> 00:03:51,300
ANNOUNCER:
<i>Basket!</i>

75
00:03:51,500 --> 00:03:52,900
- Hey, guys.
- Oh, hi, Dad.

76
00:03:53,000 --> 00:03:54,100
Sold the other ticket.

77
00:03:54,400 --> 00:03:55,600
Good. What did you get for it?

78
00:03:55,700 --> 00:03:58,700
These three frosty fellas,
and a chilidog that didn't make it.

79
00:03:59,100 --> 00:04:02,100
- Thank you.
- Great, I haven't missed much.

80
00:04:07,400 --> 00:04:11,800
I spy with my little eye

81
00:04:12,100 --> 00:04:15,700
something beginning with V.

82
00:04:18,200 --> 00:04:20,600
- Vagabonds.
- No.

83
00:04:23,300 --> 00:04:26,100
- Vittles.
- No.

84
00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:27,900
Vienna sausages.

85
00:04:28,100 --> 00:04:29,600
Where do you see
Vienna sausages?

86
00:04:30,400 --> 00:04:33,200
I thought maybe that vendor might...
Vendor, vendor.

87
00:04:33,400 --> 00:04:36,200
Excellent, Niles. Your turn.

88
00:04:38,000 --> 00:04:39,700
I spy with my little eye...

89
00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:42,000
Would you cut it out?
I'm trying to watch the game.

90
00:04:43,600 --> 00:04:46,400
- We're just playing I Spy, Dad.
- I know, and it is distracting.

91
00:04:46,700 --> 00:04:49,300
We used to do it all the time
on family vacations.

92
00:04:49,700 --> 00:04:50,900
And it was distracting then,

93
00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:53,700
so cut it out or it'll end up
like our family trip to Arizona.

94
00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:55,600
You mean,
you'll turn around in your seat

95
00:04:55,900 --> 00:04:58,200
and almost drive the arena
into the Grand Canyon?

96
00:05:00,700 --> 00:05:03,100
Tell you what, Dad, here,
why don't you switch seats with me?

97
00:05:03,400 --> 00:05:05,400
- And that way we won't disturb you.
- Okay, fine.

98
00:05:05,700 --> 00:05:08,500
- Come on. Here we go.
- Okay.

99
00:05:08,900 --> 00:05:10,900
There's the lady
who bought my ticket.

100
00:05:11,100 --> 00:05:13,100
I see you got yourself
some suds there.

101
00:05:13,300 --> 00:05:14,300
You know it.

102
00:05:14,600 --> 00:05:16,600
You can't watch the Sonics
without a beer or two.

103
00:05:16,900 --> 00:05:18,800
Especially this season,
you know what I'm saying?

104
00:05:19,100 --> 00:05:21,800
Yes. Right on.

105
00:05:23,300 --> 00:05:24,400
I spy...

106
00:05:24,600 --> 00:05:25,600
Come on, Baker!

107
00:05:25,900 --> 00:05:29,300
Move that side of beef down there
and play some defence!

108
00:05:29,600 --> 00:05:31,100
That's right. Put it back.

109
00:05:33,700 --> 00:05:35,200
Yeah!

110
00:05:35,500 --> 00:05:36,600
[CROWD CHEERING]

111
00:05:41,900 --> 00:05:43,000
Switch seats with me.

112
00:05:43,300 --> 00:05:46,900
Come on, hustle!
Let's see a little ball movement!

113
00:05:48,000 --> 00:05:50,600
I'm going to say no.

114
00:05:50,900 --> 00:05:55,000
There is no way I'm enduring this
for however long this thing lasts.

115
00:05:55,700 --> 00:05:57,100
I know. Dad, Dad, I'm sorry.

116
00:05:57,400 --> 00:05:58,800
My leg is getting a little stiff.

117
00:05:58,900 --> 00:06:01,400
Would you mind switching seats
with me so I can stretch it out?

118
00:06:01,800 --> 00:06:02,800
Stiff leg, huh?

119
00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:04,900
Must have been that bullet
you had pumped into you

120
00:06:05,200 --> 00:06:06,300
while stopping a robbery.

121
00:06:06,400 --> 00:06:08,900
Oh, no, wait, that was me.

122
00:06:10,300 --> 00:06:11,600
Dad?

123
00:06:11,900 --> 00:06:14,900
Oh, all right, all right.
This is the last time I'm moving.

124
00:06:15,200 --> 00:06:16,600
All right, excuse me.

125
00:06:16,800 --> 00:06:18,700
You go in there
and I'll step through here.

126
00:06:18,900 --> 00:06:22,000
FRASIER: Hold it.
- My leg is very tender.

127
00:06:22,300 --> 00:06:25,000
Yes.

128
00:06:25,300 --> 00:06:29,100
Oh, well, that's better.

129
00:06:29,500 --> 00:06:32,400
Niles, my legs
are much longer than yours.

130
00:06:32,600 --> 00:06:34,500
- So?
- So I should be sitting in that seat.

131
00:06:34,800 --> 00:06:37,300
- Well, I'm not switching.
- It was mine to begin with.

132
00:06:37,600 --> 00:06:40,300
Well, I'm still not switching.

133
00:06:40,700 --> 00:06:44,000
- I spy with my little...
- Then I'm not playing.

134
00:06:44,900 --> 00:06:47,600
- Fine.
- Fine.

135
00:06:54,300 --> 00:06:55,300
Now what are you doing?

136
00:06:56,600 --> 00:06:58,400
Staving off chapping.
It's very dry in here.

137
00:06:58,600 --> 00:06:59,800
I don't have any lip balm.

138
00:07:00,800 --> 00:07:02,400
I do.

139
00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:07,100
Switch seats with me.

140
00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:10,100
My integrity is not for sale.

141
00:07:10,300 --> 00:07:12,000
Suit yourself.

142
00:07:16,700 --> 00:07:17,900
Oh, Niles.

143
00:07:18,100 --> 00:07:22,400
These rich waxy emollients
are delightfully soothing.

144
00:07:22,800 --> 00:07:25,000
Oh, all right. You can have the seat.

145
00:07:26,000 --> 00:07:29,100
- Thank you.
- Give me that thing now.

146
00:07:29,500 --> 00:07:32,500
ANNOUNCER: <i>Ladies and</i>
<i>gentlemen, check your seat numbers.</i>

147
00:07:32,700 --> 00:07:34,500
<i>At half-time, one lucky fan</i>

148
00:07:34,700 --> 00:07:38,100
<i>will be taking</i>
<i>your Northwest Cable's half-court shot.</i>

149
00:07:38,300 --> 00:07:39,800
<i>Are you ready?</i>

150
00:07:40,100 --> 00:07:45,000
<i>If you're seated in Section 101,</i>
<i>Row 4, Seat 2,</i>

151
00:07:45,300 --> 00:07:48,400
<i>congratulations.</i>

152
00:08:00,700 --> 00:08:02,100
FRASIER: Good luck, Niles.
- Thanks. Thanks.

153
00:08:02,300 --> 00:08:03,800
- Great, Niles.
- Excuse me. Thanks, Dad.

154
00:08:04,100 --> 00:08:05,200
Come on, right this way.

155
00:08:05,400 --> 00:08:07,100
Now, I need you
to sign this release form.

156
00:08:07,300 --> 00:08:08,700
- Why? What happens?
- Look, nothing.

157
00:08:09,000 --> 00:08:11,200
It's just that so we can use
your image on television.

158
00:08:11,500 --> 00:08:13,400
- Okay.
- Okay. Here.

159
00:08:13,700 --> 00:08:15,500
Great.

160
00:08:16,200 --> 00:08:18,400
Perfect.
Now I need you to put this on.

161
00:08:18,600 --> 00:08:21,100
Okay, here. Let me undo this.

162
00:08:21,300 --> 00:08:23,500
Absolutely.

163
00:08:23,700 --> 00:08:26,200
- Are you feeling okay?
- Oh.

164
00:08:26,500 --> 00:08:31,000
Just, I haven't done
a lot of basketballing

165
00:08:31,400 --> 00:08:34,900
and I might just be a tad nervous.

166
00:08:35,300 --> 00:08:39,100
Don't worry.
Nobody makes the shot.

167
00:08:39,400 --> 00:08:44,000
That's comforting, except that's...
I'm not sure I can even roll that far.

168
00:08:44,400 --> 00:08:45,900
[AIR HORN BLOWING]

169
00:08:46,200 --> 00:08:48,600
Oh, my God.
What the hell was that?

170
00:08:48,900 --> 00:08:51,500
It's nothing. It's just half-time.

171
00:08:56,000 --> 00:08:59,800
Thank God we switched seats.
I mean, that could be me down there.

172
00:09:00,100 --> 00:09:01,700
- Poor Niles.
- What do you mean?

173
00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:04,800
Every guy
dreams of a chance like this.

174
00:09:05,100 --> 00:09:07,700
Dream or not, Dad, eventually,
he's gonna try to take that shot.

175
00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:09,500
You know how Niles throws.

176
00:09:09,700 --> 00:09:11,500
Yeah, and you're Pete Maravich.

177
00:09:12,100 --> 00:09:14,200
I don't know what that means.

178
00:09:14,500 --> 00:09:17,700
It means, instead of criticising him,
you might be a little more supportive.

179
00:09:18,100 --> 00:09:19,700
Because no matter
what happens down there,

180
00:09:20,000 --> 00:09:21,400
he's still your brother and my son.

181
00:09:23,500 --> 00:09:25,000
Here we go.

182
00:09:25,300 --> 00:09:27,000
Hand me his beer.
I'm gonna need it.

183
00:09:27,300 --> 00:09:28,800
ANNOUNCER:
<i>Ladies and gentlemen,</i>

184
00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:32,300
<i>here to attempt your</i>
<i>Northwest Cable's half-court shot,</i>

185
00:09:32,700 --> 00:09:37,900
<i>from right here in Seattle,</i>
<i>Niles Crane!</i>

186
00:09:38,300 --> 00:09:39,400
[CROWD CHEERING]

187
00:09:40,400 --> 00:09:42,900
Here you go, Niles. Good luck.

188
00:10:30,400 --> 00:10:31,500
[CROWD CHEERING]

189
00:10:59,300 --> 00:11:00,800
Now entering the apartment,

190
00:11:01,000 --> 00:11:04,000
a 5'9" psychiatrist
from Seattle, Washington.

191
00:11:04,300 --> 00:11:07,400
- Niles Crane!
MARTIN: Yay!

192
00:11:07,900 --> 00:11:10,100
He shakes, he bakes.

193
00:11:10,400 --> 00:11:11,800
He drives to the coat rack.

194
00:11:12,100 --> 00:11:16,100
He fakes an arm out of the sleeve,
he puts it up, it's gone!

195
00:11:17,400 --> 00:11:18,400
Thank you, Dad.

196
00:11:18,700 --> 00:11:20,300
- Glass of sherry, Niles?
NILES: Please.

197
00:11:20,500 --> 00:11:24,000
He calls glass,
and except for the sherry, it's good!

198
00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:25,400
Okay, Dad.

199
00:11:25,700 --> 00:11:26,800
FRASIER:
Gosh, Niles.

200
00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:29,600
You making that basket tonight
was truly astonishing.

201
00:11:29,900 --> 00:11:31,100
And what's even
more unbelievable

202
00:11:31,400 --> 00:11:35,500
is that you are now the proud owner
of a rugged, ram-tough,

203
00:11:35,900 --> 00:11:38,700
all-terrain pickup truck.

204
00:11:39,500 --> 00:11:41,400
It occurred to me
we could use it to go antiquing.

205
00:11:41,600 --> 00:11:42,800
Ah.

206
00:11:43,500 --> 00:11:46,200
Fourteen messages. New record.

207
00:11:46,500 --> 00:11:47,500
[MACHINE BEEPS]

208
00:11:47,800 --> 00:11:49,400
DUKE'S VOICE:
<i>Hey, Martin, it's Duke.</i>

209
00:11:49,600 --> 00:11:52,100
<i>Was that Niles on SportsCenter</i>
<i>or am I drunk?</i>

210
00:11:52,500 --> 00:11:53,700
<i>Call me.</i>

211
00:11:53,900 --> 00:11:54,800
[MACHINE BEEPS]

212
00:11:55,100 --> 00:11:57,200
FRANK'S VOICE:
<i>Marty, it's Frank. Bad news.</i>

213
00:11:57,500 --> 00:11:59,400
<i>Stosh had another heart attack.</i>

214
00:11:59,700 --> 00:12:01,300
<i>He saw your son make that basket.</i>

215
00:12:01,500 --> 00:12:04,400
<i>It's the greatest thing I ever seen.</i>
<i>Give me a call.</i>

216
00:12:04,800 --> 00:12:05,800
[MACHINE BEEPS]

217
00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:08,600
STOSH'S VOICE:
<i>Hey, Marty, it's Stosh. Bad news</i>...

218
00:12:08,900 --> 00:12:10,200
FRANK'S VOICE:
<i>I just did that one.</i>

219
00:12:11,100 --> 00:12:12,600
STOSH:
<i>I'll call you later.</i>

220
00:12:12,900 --> 00:12:15,100
<i>Make sure you catch SportsCenter.</i>
<i>Congrats.</i>

221
00:12:15,400 --> 00:12:17,100
We'll listen to the rest of them later.

222
00:12:17,300 --> 00:12:20,100
Niles, I can't tell you
how great you were tonight.

223
00:12:20,400 --> 00:12:22,000
Well, thanks, Dad,
but I wasn't great.

224
00:12:22,300 --> 00:12:24,000
I just walked out on the court

225
00:12:24,300 --> 00:12:25,900
and heaved the ball
as hard as I could,

226
00:12:26,200 --> 00:12:27,300
and the rest was just luck.

227
00:12:27,500 --> 00:12:30,400
That may be so, Niles, but still and all,
you did go down and do it.

228
00:12:30,900 --> 00:12:32,300
Not many people
could have done that.

229
00:12:32,500 --> 00:12:35,400
I know I always told you boys
that sports aren't important,

230
00:12:35,700 --> 00:12:37,700
but they are.

231
00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:43,300
And what you did tonight out there
makes me really proud.

232
00:12:43,700 --> 00:12:44,700
Thanks.

233
00:12:44,900 --> 00:12:46,700
Good thing I wangled those tickets,
hey, Dad?

234
00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:48,500
Oh, look, Niles is on TV!

235
00:12:48,800 --> 00:12:51,200
I can't believe it.
You made Play of the Week.

236
00:12:51,500 --> 00:12:54,300
We got us a real live celebrity
in our own home.

237
00:12:54,600 --> 00:12:56,600
It's up and it's good!

238
00:13:05,000 --> 00:13:08,400
NILES: Excuse me.
Nonfat latte to go, please.

239
00:13:08,600 --> 00:13:10,900
Hey, Frasier, mind if I join you?

240
00:13:14,400 --> 00:13:18,100
Are you sure?
The jocks usually sit over at that table.

241
00:13:18,400 --> 00:13:20,100
This thing?

242
00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:24,000
Yes, this was just part
of a gift package the Sonics sent over.

243
00:13:26,100 --> 00:13:29,500
I just didn't wanna seem ungrateful.
Not that I owe them anything.

244
00:13:29,900 --> 00:13:33,600
After all, I'm the one
that drained it from way downtown.

245
00:13:34,500 --> 00:13:35,900
Yes, so we've been hearing.

246
00:13:36,200 --> 00:13:37,400
NILES:
Frasier, don't grouse.

247
00:13:37,600 --> 00:13:40,300
I've earmarked
a pair of practise pants for you.

248
00:13:41,400 --> 00:13:45,300
Thank you, Niles, but I like to think
I've already mastered pants.

249
00:13:46,200 --> 00:13:47,300
I assume you're gonna select

250
00:13:47,500 --> 00:13:49,500
a more appropriate jacket
for this evening's concert.

251
00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:52,100
Yeah, about that, Dad wants me
to go with him to McGinty's,

252
00:13:52,400 --> 00:13:53,900
so he can have me tell the tale.

253
00:13:54,200 --> 00:13:56,100
But we've already
rescheduled the concert once.

254
00:13:56,400 --> 00:13:57,600
That was because of you.

255
00:13:57,900 --> 00:13:59,800
It was not because of me,
it was because of Dad.

256
00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:02,500
- So is McGinty's.
- Well, it's not the same.

257
00:14:02,900 --> 00:14:03,900
We had an agreement.

258
00:14:04,100 --> 00:14:07,000
If you should choose to dishonour it,
there will be consequences.

259
00:14:08,300 --> 00:14:09,300
Why don't we compromise?

260
00:14:09,500 --> 00:14:12,300
Let's say we go and have
a drink with Dad at McGinty's,

261
00:14:12,600 --> 00:14:14,900
and then afterwards
proceed on to the concert?

262
00:14:15,200 --> 00:14:17,100
Well, I just don't...
I don't... Well, l...

263
00:14:17,400 --> 00:14:19,100
All right, fine.

264
00:14:19,800 --> 00:14:22,800
- Thank you. I'll see you later, Frasier.
- Yes.

265
00:14:23,600 --> 00:14:26,000
Wow, Niles.

266
00:14:26,300 --> 00:14:29,600
Finally made varsity
after 30 years, huh?

267
00:14:31,200 --> 00:14:33,200
Yes, but it's not
a real varsity jacket, Roz,

268
00:14:33,500 --> 00:14:36,200
so you're under no obligation
to sleep with me.

269
00:14:38,400 --> 00:14:40,600
- See you around.
- Take care.

270
00:14:41,700 --> 00:14:43,200
Hi, Frasier.

271
00:14:43,300 --> 00:14:45,100
You may join me if you wish, Roz.

272
00:14:45,400 --> 00:14:48,000
Be forewarned,
I'm feeling a bit peevish.

273
00:14:48,300 --> 00:14:51,700
For God's sake,
you're like Goldilocks with that latte.

274
00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:55,200
This foam is too hard,
this foam is too soft.

275
00:14:55,500 --> 00:14:57,600
No, this is not about
latte foam, Roz.

276
00:14:57,900 --> 00:15:01,000
And since Niles made that basket, his
head's been getting bigger and bigger.

277
00:15:01,400 --> 00:15:03,600
You have to admit
it was pretty amazing.

278
00:15:03,900 --> 00:15:06,300
Amazingly lucky.

279
00:15:06,600 --> 00:15:08,100
But to hear Niles tell it:

280
00:15:08,400 --> 00:15:12,400
It all started
in a little rubber factory in Sumatra,

281
00:15:14,200 --> 00:15:16,500
where an unsuspecting basketball
began a journey

282
00:15:16,700 --> 00:15:18,900
that would lead to greatness.

283
00:15:19,200 --> 00:15:21,900
So he's milking it a little bit.
You would do the same thing.

284
00:15:22,200 --> 00:15:23,200
I would not.

285
00:15:23,500 --> 00:15:25,400
I would treat it
as the chance occurrence it was.

286
00:15:25,700 --> 00:15:28,500
Like finding a terrific parking spot
in front of the opera house.

287
00:15:28,800 --> 00:15:32,900
- You bragged about that for weeks.
- It was right in front of the steps, Roz.

288
00:15:33,300 --> 00:15:35,300
You know what I mean, Frasier.

289
00:15:36,400 --> 00:15:38,500
Yes, I suppose I do.

290
00:15:38,800 --> 00:15:41,400
Guess I'll just have to grin
and bear it for a little while longer.

291
00:15:42,800 --> 00:15:44,000
ROZ:
Here's Jean-Pierre.

292
00:15:44,300 --> 00:15:45,800
Oh, your French beau.
How's that going?

293
00:15:46,000 --> 00:15:47,500
- I'm breaking up with him.
- I'm sorry.

294
00:15:48,100 --> 00:15:50,100
- Actually, you're going to do it for me.
- What?

295
00:15:50,300 --> 00:15:52,700
Since I don't speak French,
I need you to translate, please.

296
00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:54,800
For God's sake... Well, all right.

297
00:15:56,200 --> 00:16:00,000
We're having coffee. Sit down.

298
00:16:01,300 --> 00:16:03,200
I can't imagine
why this isn't working.

299
00:16:04,300 --> 00:16:07,000
Jean-Pierre, this is Frasier.

300
00:16:07,500 --> 00:16:08,500
[IN FRENCH]

301
00:16:10,200 --> 00:16:11,500
ROZ:
Now, I wanna do this gently,

302
00:16:11,800 --> 00:16:14,000
so will you tell him
that I think he's a really nice guy?

303
00:16:14,300 --> 00:16:15,200
Uh-huh.

304
00:16:15,400 --> 00:16:16,600
[IN FRENCH]

305
00:16:25,400 --> 00:16:26,500
- What did he say?
- Um...

306
00:16:26,600 --> 00:16:29,900
He says
that he's very fond of you too.

307
00:16:30,600 --> 00:16:35,700
Okay. Now tell him that these past
few weeks have been really fun.

308
00:16:36,100 --> 00:16:38,500
You can go faster, Roz.

309
00:16:38,900 --> 00:16:41,300
Let me do this my way. Tell him.

310
00:16:57,700 --> 00:17:00,700
He says,
"What are you trying to say?"

311
00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:02,200
Okay.

312
00:17:02,500 --> 00:17:04,500
Tell him that another time,

313
00:17:04,800 --> 00:17:08,800
another place,
we might have a shot.

314
00:17:09,200 --> 00:17:11,200
But this just isn't working for me.

315
00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:32,500
Is there any chance
you would reconsider?

316
00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:35,600
- I don't think so.
- Uh-huh.

317
00:17:41,300 --> 00:17:43,900
- Is he okay?
- Yes, Roz, he'll be fine.

318
00:17:44,200 --> 00:17:47,000
But, you know, for his sake I think
we should wrap this up, all right?

319
00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:50,100
- Jean-Pierre...
- Roz.

320
00:17:54,400 --> 00:17:56,100
- He says that he'll...
- Please, Frasier.

321
00:17:56,400 --> 00:17:58,500
Some things
don't need to be translated.

322
00:18:09,200 --> 00:18:12,000
So at this point,
what were you thinking?

323
00:18:12,600 --> 00:18:14,200
Stop tape, please.

324
00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:17,600
I'd have been thinking
about that sweet truck.

325
00:18:17,900 --> 00:18:19,500
BARTENDER: Yeah, me too.
- Not me.

326
00:18:19,800 --> 00:18:21,100
If you're focusing on the reward,

327
00:18:21,400 --> 00:18:24,300
that's energy you're not using
to make the shot.

328
00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:26,100
MARTIN:
You know what else?

329
00:18:26,300 --> 00:18:28,100
He's donating that truck
to the Police Activities League.

330
00:18:28,300 --> 00:18:29,400
[PATRONS APPLAUDING]

331
00:18:29,600 --> 00:18:32,800
I just want the kids to know
it's about the playoffs, not the payoffs.

332
00:18:33,100 --> 00:18:36,000
Is this a great boy or what?

333
00:18:36,300 --> 00:18:38,100
You sure I can't pay you
for this beer?

334
00:18:38,400 --> 00:18:39,400
Your money's no good here.

335
00:18:39,600 --> 00:18:42,800
Half-court Crane's dad
doesn't pay for drinks.

336
00:18:43,700 --> 00:18:45,800
Excuse me, Niles,
but we have a concert to make.

337
00:18:46,200 --> 00:18:48,400
I know, soon. I can't leave
the fellas hanging, Frasier.

338
00:18:48,600 --> 00:18:49,900
All right, back to the tape.

339
00:18:50,200 --> 00:18:54,200
All right, now,
that's about 45 feet to that basket.

340
00:18:54,500 --> 00:18:58,900
You see, I used my whole body.
Form is everything.

341
00:18:59,300 --> 00:19:01,700
You've already made
or missed the shot

342
00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:04,600
even before you release the ball.

343
00:19:05,000 --> 00:19:07,100
And, of course,
we all know the rest of the story.

344
00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:08,600
Yes, yes.

345
00:19:08,800 --> 00:19:10,200
The story is:

346
00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:13,200
Once upon a time, Niles Crane
accidentally made a basket.

347
00:19:13,500 --> 00:19:15,400
The end!

348
00:19:17,100 --> 00:19:18,800
I don't deny
there was some luck involved,

349
00:19:18,900 --> 00:19:22,800
but as we all know,
luck is the residue of design.

350
00:19:23,200 --> 00:19:27,500
Please. Somehow managing to hurl
a ball forward is hardly design.

351
00:19:27,900 --> 00:19:32,500
You're just jealous
because I have game and you don't.

352
00:19:33,700 --> 00:19:36,300
Oh, please.
So you think you have game?

353
00:19:36,500 --> 00:19:38,800
- I do have game.
- Do you think they're gonna fight?

354
00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:41,400
I got news for you, they are fighting.

355
00:19:41,700 --> 00:19:43,600
We'll just see about that. Barkeep.

356
00:19:43,900 --> 00:19:44,900
What are you doing?

357
00:19:45,200 --> 00:19:48,300
I'm gonna challenge Niles to a game of
one-on-one on that contraption there.

358
00:19:48,700 --> 00:19:49,900
What do you wanna do that for?

359
00:19:50,100 --> 00:19:51,900
Twenty dollars
of your cleanest quarters.

360
00:19:52,200 --> 00:19:53,200
What about your concert?

361
00:19:53,500 --> 00:19:55,000
You guys better get moving.
Tick, tock.

362
00:19:55,200 --> 00:19:57,500
All right, Frasier, game on.

363
00:19:59,600 --> 00:20:04,100
Wait, it's not worth it.
Sports aren't everything.

364
00:20:04,500 --> 00:20:07,400
All right, hotshot, after you.

365
00:20:07,800 --> 00:20:10,600
Let's go half court. Put it up, baby.

366
00:20:10,900 --> 00:20:11,900
Thank you, thank you.

367
00:20:12,100 --> 00:20:15,700
I appreciate the support, but I think
I might throw better with fewer voices.

368
00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:28,000
Well, obviously I'm accustomed
to shooting from further back.

369
00:20:28,300 --> 00:20:31,700
Yes, and just once. Allow me.

370
00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:41,300
All right, all right, your turn.

371
00:20:41,600 --> 00:20:44,500
All right.
I believe I'm warmed up now.

372
00:20:50,500 --> 00:20:53,900
Yeah, I hit the round part
and that's worth a half a point.

373
00:20:55,800 --> 00:20:59,200
- I think I could use another beer.
- That will be 2.95.