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[THEME SONG PLAYING]
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Let me have a tall skinny to go,
please, and you can keep the change.
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Now, I've only got a moment.
I've taken on a very exciting project.
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-Oh, really.
-FRASIER: Yes. You know,
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this is KACL's 50th anniversary.
I did a little research,
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found out that they used to
specialize in live radio dramas.
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So I'm putting one on.
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-Surely you must remember them.
-Oh, sure.
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Yes, people of Dad's generation
would sit around at night,
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listening to the radio,
absolutely mesmerized.
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We were a simple people.
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FRASIER: All right, Dad.
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I spoke with the station manager.
He's given me 30 minutes
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to re-create the very first
mystery KACL ever aired.
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-Nightmare Inn.
-Oh, don't tell me, I know.
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Bunch of people get caught in a
storm, and everybody's wondering
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who's gonna be the first one murdered.
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-Exactly! And I'm going to direct.
-Oh, so we can stop wondering.
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You don't think he knows how to direct?
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No, the trouble is he doesn't
know how to stop directing.
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In our prep school
production of Richard III,
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he drove the entire cast crazy
with his constant critiquing.
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I seem to recall a delay on opening
night while our Richard chased Frasier
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around the dressing room,
beating him with his hump.
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Niles, it was just a little backstage
horseplay to relieve tension.
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-Thank you.
-You have an Orson Welles complex.
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In the end, you'll be directing,
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you'll have rewritten the
script and be playing the lead.
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I have no intention of
performing in it myself.
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The only rewriting I've done is simply
cutting, to get it down to 30 minutes.
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-"Frasier Crane's Nightmare Inn"?
-It's just a working title.
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Well, that's our show for today,
but let me remind you to tune in
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on Saturday night for KACL's
presentation of Nightmare Inn.
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Just set your dials for goose bumps.
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Till then, this is Dr. Frasier
Crane reminding you that
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you'll never know what's
lurking in the shadows.
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[LAUGHING]
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Well, that should certainly
comfort the woman
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who called in about her paranoia.
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-Do we have a leading man yet?
-No.
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-Well, you could do it.
-Oh, don't be silly, Roz.
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My God, it is a juicy part,
does call for a strong voice,
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-but believe me, my hands are full.
-Oh, Frasier,
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I've had a quick peek at your
script, and I think I'd be perfect
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as "Bull" Kragen, the brutish gamekeeper.
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You know, Gil, I think that's
just a bit too on the nose.
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-Well, maybe.
-But you know what you could play?
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Yes. Nigel Fairservice.
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Drummed out of the Royal Air
Force under mysterious circumstances.
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With him playing it, they
may not seem so mysterious.
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I'll take it.
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After all, Nigel does have that
divine speech in the second act
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about his boyhood in Surrey:
"Romping with his school chums
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"in the fens and spinneys,
when the twilight bathed"
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the hedgerows like a lambent flame."
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Actually, I had rather a
long peek at the script.
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Gosh, we still have a lot of
these supporting roles to cast.
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Actually, I'm working on that.
Jennifer down in Accounting
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is married to a professional
actor who specializes in dialects.
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I'm thinking of asking him to
play six or seven smaller parts.
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Hey, Doc. Need one more for your play?
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Absolutely, Bulldog.
Just as long as you promise
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-to promote it on your show.
-Actually, I wasn't talking about me.
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I was talking about a
friend of mine, Maxine.
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-Does she have experience?
-BULLDOG: Are you kidding?
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If she had a dollar for every
minute she spent on stage…
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Oh, wait a minute. She does.
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Well, we do still have the part of
the maid. She only has one line.
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-Does it have any big words?
-No, it's simple.
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"Look out! He's got a gun."
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Maxine could knock that
line right out of the park.
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Well, okay, but you have
to agree to play a part too.
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We still need someone for
the sinister silk merchant.
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Okay, it's a deal.
And Maxine is gonna be so excited.
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I gotta remember to pick her up
one of those cute French maid outfits
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-on my way home from work.
-It's radio.
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-She doesn't have to be in costume.
-Maybe here she doesn't.
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-Well, we're getting there.
-Except for the lead.
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I haven't found anyone remotely qualified
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to play a wily old
Scotland Yard inspector.
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You may be right.
I may have to bite the bullet.
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-Take on the part myself.
-IAN: Excuse me, Dr Crane.
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Is it too late to read for
the role of the inspector?
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I'm afraid the part has already been cast.
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[DOORBELL CHIMES]
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-DAPHNE: Come on in.
-Hi, Daphne.
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-GIL: Hello.
-FRASIER: Bulldog, Gil.
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Right on time, good.
We have to be on our toes tonight,
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we have a professional actor with us.
Mel White,
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-our man of a thousand voices.
-Oh, it's a huge pleasure.
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Mel is going to play Hans, the
German butler, both McCallister sisters,
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and Peppo the dwarf, "a
little man with a big secret."
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The same guy's playing all those parts?
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Yes, he's also playing "Bull"
Kragen, the gamekeeper,
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and O'Toole, the handyman.
Are you up to it?
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Just so they don't all talk at once.
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[FRASIER LAUGHING]
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Isn't it lovely to be
working with a professional?
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-Hold it. Bulldog, where's Maxine?
-She's home with food poisoning.
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It's nothing serious. I think she
just wrestled in some bad Jell-O.
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Well, never mind.
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She just has one line, anyway.
"Look out! He's got a gun."
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You think you… You might be
up to that this evening, Daphne?
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-Oh, I'll try.
-FRASIER: Good.
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Frasier, one of Nigel's
lines seems to be missing.
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Yes, I had to cut the
play by 20 minutes, Gil.
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Yes, yes. But that line so
neatly defined Nigel's character.
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Saying "gesundheit"
after the butler sneezes?
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It shows he's a caring person.
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-It's cut, Gil. Learn to let go.
-Oh, very well.
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As long as I still have that delicious
speech about my boyhood in Surrey.
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-Yes, that's still in.
-"Romping with my school chums
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-in fens and spinneys…"
-Yes, yes, that one!
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Yes, thank you.
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All right, now, I fear we may
be running just a bit long still.
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So I've asked Daphne
to time us this evening,
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and also, Noel hasn't rounded
up all the sound effects yet,
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so I'm gonna have Daphne
read those directions as well.
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Now, that's a lot of
responsibility on you,
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are you sure you're up to it?
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All right. Start the watch.
Stage direction.
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-"Sound of door opening."
-Inspector, thank God you've come.
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-Stop the watch.
-[STOPWATCH CLICKS]
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Roz, I have a line here that
says, "When she opened her lips,
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I caught a hint of some exotic accent."
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You'll notice it does not say, "When
she opened her lips, cheese fell out."
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Okay, and…
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Start the watch.
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This is a grisly business, Miss Thorndyke.
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"Sound of door closing."
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I can't believe any of my guests
could be a multiple murderer.
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That's easy for you to say,
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but my job is to suspect everyone.
Please introduce me to your guests.
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This is the silk merchant, Mr. Wang.
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[BULLDOG LAUGHS]
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Stop the watch.
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-What's your problem?
-"Wang"?
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You gotta give me another name.
I'll crack up every time I hear that.
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All right. All right.
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How about "Wing"? All right?
That's a great old Chinese name.
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All right, everybody, change
Wang to Wing in your scripts.
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Sound of people changing Wangs to Wings.
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From your line. Start.
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This is the silk merchant, Mr. Wing.
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Did you see anything suspicious, Wing?
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Oh, me no lookee.
Me go beddy-bye, chop-chop.
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Stop! Chinese Embassy on line one.
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-You can't say that.
-FRASIER: It's all right.
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I'll just adjust his dialogue later.
All right. Start.
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I'm Nigel Fairservice, Inspector.
I was strolling in the garden
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-when this dreadful tragedy occurred.
-Did anyone see you?
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Several people. Hans, the German butler…
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[GERMAN ACCENT] Ja, I saw him.
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Stop.
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You know, that's wonderful, Mel…
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But he sounds to me just a
bit more Austrian than German.
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I've done that accent both on
Broadway and the London stage.
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Yes, well, perhaps they have
different standards than I have.
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All right, everyone.
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From the beginning once again.
Now, this time, please, people, dig in,
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and try to find the reality.
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From the dwarf's entrance.
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And so the case was closed.
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And with a grateful shudder,
I swore I'd never return
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to Nightmare Inn.
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Stop. Time?
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-That's 32 minutes, 40 seconds.
-Damn!
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I'll trim some more before we try again.
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Again? We did this four times!
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We'll do it till I'm completely satisfied.
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Oh, which reminds me, Mel…
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I'm still not entirely happy with
the second McCallister sister.
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Oh?
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Well, she doesn't sound
spinsterish enough to me.
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I see.
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You also told me that my
gamekeeper sounded too cultured,
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that my Irishman sounded
more Protestant than Catholic,
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and that my dwarf was too tall!
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Let me try Hans again and tell
me how my German is sounding.
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-[GERMAN ACCENT] I quit!
-Well, oh, wait! You can't…
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Sound of door slamming.
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-So, what do we do now, boss?
-Not to worry. I have a plan.
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ROZ: Oh, yeah, right. We're
supposed to do this thing tomorrow night.
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Where are you gonna find an idiot
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willing to take six dialect
parts unrehearsed?
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Niles.
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The sound of ominous organ
music indicating trouble ahead.
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GIL: Oh, there's your brother.
189
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How is he enjoying the
prospect of playing six parts?
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00:09:51,984 --> 00:09:54,153
Actually, he doesn't know about it yet.
191
00:09:54,320 --> 00:09:56,154
If he did, he never would have agreed.
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Frasier. You were going to
messenger the script to me
193
00:09:58,698 --> 00:10:01,284
-this morning.
-I'm so, so sorry, I was tinkering with it
194
00:10:01,368 --> 00:10:03,870
until the last minute.
But not to worry, your natural talent
195
00:10:03,954 --> 00:10:06,581
will carry you through.
All right, look, take a look at this.
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00:10:06,665 --> 00:10:08,082
Noel will give us a demonstration
197
00:10:08,166 --> 00:10:09,834
of the sound effects. What have you got?
198
00:10:09,918 --> 00:10:11,710
Okay.
199
00:10:11,877 --> 00:10:15,297
This is my door sound, my thunder screen,
200
00:10:15,464 --> 00:10:17,550
balloons for gunshots,
201
00:10:17,716 --> 00:10:20,719
and this plays various
kinds of organ music.
202
00:10:20,928 --> 00:10:22,263
[ORGAN MUSIC PLAYING]
203
00:10:22,596 --> 00:10:25,099
-Oh, yes.
-That's great.
204
00:10:25,266 --> 00:10:29,185
I've also got a gravel box, bells,
a rain stick and coffee thermos.
205
00:10:29,352 --> 00:10:32,647
-What does that do?
-Keeps my coffee warm.
206
00:10:33,314 --> 00:10:36,818
-Everybody, this is Maxine.
-Oh, hello, Maxine. Welcome.
207
00:10:36,985 --> 00:10:39,571
Hi.
I need a quiet place to work on my part.
208
00:10:39,737 --> 00:10:41,239
Oh, you got it, baby.
209
00:10:41,406 --> 00:10:43,073
Why don't you go up here in the booth.
210
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FRASIER: Bulldog?
211
00:10:45,367 --> 00:10:47,244
Work on her part? It's just one line.
212
00:10:47,411 --> 00:10:49,871
Yeah, but she's got that
condition, what do you call it?
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00:10:49,955 --> 00:10:51,999
It begins with a "dis." Dis, dis…
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00:10:52,166 --> 00:10:53,375
Distemper?
215
00:10:55,085 --> 00:10:57,462
Dyslexia. That's it, she's dyslexic.
216
00:10:57,629 --> 00:11:00,529
-And you tell me that now.
-No, no. Hey, she'll be great.
217
00:11:00,673 --> 00:11:02,132
It's me I'm worried about.
218
00:11:02,216 --> 00:11:04,134
I've got some serious
butterflies going here.
219
00:11:04,218 --> 00:11:05,719
But you're on radio all the time.
220
00:11:05,803 --> 00:11:09,891
Yeah, but that's me being me.
This is acting. It's… It's scary.
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00:11:11,642 --> 00:11:14,310
Listen, that's all a part of the
thrill of the live performance,
222
00:11:14,394 --> 00:11:15,896
butterflies in the stomach,
223
00:11:16,062 --> 00:11:19,191
sweaty palms, scratchy
throat, pounding heart.
224
00:11:19,357 --> 00:11:22,777
-I suppose you have all of those.
-I do now.
225
00:11:24,446 --> 00:11:29,742
[MUMBLING] Sorry I'm late, Frasier. I just spent
two hours in the dentist's chair.
226
00:11:31,202 --> 00:11:34,955
-An emergency.
-What is the matter?
227
00:11:35,122 --> 00:11:39,043
Novocain.
He said it would wear off by now.
228
00:11:39,210 --> 00:11:42,129
Oh, I keep biting my lip.
229
00:11:43,672 --> 00:11:45,965
Dear God. We've got 60 seconds.
230
00:11:46,132 --> 00:11:47,842
Well, I don't even know who I'm playing.
231
00:11:47,926 --> 00:11:49,802
Don't worry, I'll cue you as we go along.
232
00:11:49,886 --> 00:11:51,804
-Shouldn't I prepare a little?
-Now, listen,
233
00:11:51,888 --> 00:11:54,265
your natural spontaneity is
your best asset as an actor.
234
00:11:54,349 --> 00:11:56,767
What was it the Yale Daily
News said about your Tartuffe?
235
00:11:56,851 --> 00:11:59,436
Oh, who remembers?
That I had the magnetism of Marlon Brando,
236
00:11:59,520 --> 00:12:02,522
the charm of Danny Kaye and
the range of Laurence Olivier.
237
00:12:03,106 --> 00:12:05,317
All right, everyone. Places, please.
238
00:12:05,484 --> 00:12:08,195
-Hurry up, it's starting!
-All right.
239
00:12:08,362 --> 00:12:10,947
FRASIER: Good evening.
This is Frasier Crane
240
00:12:11,031 --> 00:12:15,660
welcoming you to KACL's re-creation
of the original Mystery Theater.
241
00:12:15,826 --> 00:12:19,204
I already know the plot, but I'll try not
to blurt out the name of the murderer.
242
00:12:19,288 --> 00:12:23,292
Great.
As a cop, I hated it when people did that.
243
00:12:24,627 --> 00:12:26,503
FRASIER: In all my years at the Yard,
244
00:12:26,587 --> 00:12:29,131
I doubt I'd ever seen a fouler night…
245
00:12:30,424 --> 00:12:34,261
Than that on which I was called
out to investigate a double murder
246
00:12:34,427 --> 00:12:37,013
at the old inn on the moors.
247
00:12:41,226 --> 00:12:44,771
The door was answered
by Miss Carlotta Thorndyke.
248
00:12:46,563 --> 00:12:47,856
Her face was unfamiliar,
249
00:12:48,023 --> 00:12:49,775
and when she opened her lips,
250
00:12:49,942 --> 00:12:53,195
I caught a hint of some exotic accent.
251
00:12:53,362 --> 00:12:54,822
Inspector… Ow.
252
00:12:57,199 --> 00:12:59,868
Thank God you've come.
253
00:13:07,458 --> 00:13:10,503
This is a grisly business, Miss Thorndyke.
254
00:13:10,837 --> 00:13:16,676
I can't believe any of my guests
could be a multiple murderer.
255
00:13:22,139 --> 00:13:25,225
That's easy for you to say.
256
00:13:26,852 --> 00:13:29,646
But my job is to suspect everybody.
257
00:13:29,813 --> 00:13:31,398
Please introduce me to your…
258
00:13:31,565 --> 00:13:36,986
No, no. Never mind.
I know your guests by reputation.
259
00:13:37,153 --> 00:13:39,864
This must be Mr. Wing, the silk merchant.
260
00:13:40,031 --> 00:13:42,533
Did you witness anything suspicious, Wing?
261
00:13:44,869 --> 00:13:49,998
Of course, the inscrutable
and mute Mr. Wing…
262
00:13:51,166 --> 00:13:53,126
Who…
263
00:13:54,044 --> 00:13:56,171
Wears a bell on his hat.
264
00:13:56,379 --> 00:13:59,299
Did you witness anything suspicious, Wing?
265
00:14:01,259 --> 00:14:03,594
No, eh? I'll remember you said that.
266
00:14:05,304 --> 00:14:07,431
I'm Nigel Fairservice, Inspector.
267
00:14:07,598 --> 00:14:11,143
I was strolling in the garden
when this dreadful tragedy occurred.
268
00:14:11,310 --> 00:14:13,479
-Did anyone see you?
-Several people.
269
00:14:13,645 --> 00:14:16,023
Hans, the German butler.
270
00:14:16,690 --> 00:14:20,109
Ja, I saw the gentleman.
271
00:14:20,276 --> 00:14:22,278
O'Toole, the gardener.
272
00:14:24,530 --> 00:14:27,658
Aye, 'twas himself and no mistake.
273
00:14:27,992 --> 00:14:30,912
As well as Prudence McCallister.
274
00:14:34,290 --> 00:14:37,209
Yes, I was taking a breath of air.
275
00:14:37,876 --> 00:14:41,755
I tried to shake Nigel's alibi,
but each witness was adamant.
276
00:14:41,922 --> 00:14:43,506
-O'Toole:
-Faith, and it's true.
277
00:14:43,590 --> 00:14:44,758
-Hans:
-Jawohl.
278
00:14:44,966 --> 00:14:47,761
-Miss McCallister:
-Oh, mercy, yes.
279
00:14:47,928 --> 00:14:49,970
There remained one
suspect whose whereabouts
280
00:14:50,054 --> 00:14:51,555
had not yet been established.
281
00:14:51,722 --> 00:14:54,683
Peppo the dwarf, a
retired circus performer.
282
00:14:57,353 --> 00:15:01,357
Exactly where were you when
the murders occurred, Peppo?
283
00:15:10,156 --> 00:15:12,700
Peppo! Where were you?
284
00:15:12,867 --> 00:15:15,120
I was at the movies.
285
00:15:16,746 --> 00:15:18,998
At the movies, you say?
286
00:15:19,165 --> 00:15:22,376
Well, one quick phone
call can verify that.
287
00:15:23,127 --> 00:15:25,087
What's this?
288
00:15:25,254 --> 00:15:28,715
Dear God! The phone lines have been cut.
289
00:15:28,882 --> 00:15:31,176
[ORGAN MUSIC PLAYING]
290
00:15:31,844 --> 00:15:33,637
Now we're really stranded.
291
00:15:33,804 --> 00:15:37,056
Totally and completely
isolated from any contact
292
00:15:37,223 --> 00:15:38,724
with the outside world.
293
00:15:38,891 --> 00:15:40,435
[PHONE RINGS]
294
00:15:40,601 --> 00:15:42,520
Studio Five.
295
00:15:42,728 --> 00:15:44,480
Sorry.
296
00:15:48,818 --> 00:15:52,946
The phone lines have been
repaired, you say? Hello?
297
00:15:53,113 --> 00:15:55,532
Wait! They've gone dead again.
298
00:15:57,284 --> 00:16:00,454
Who knows what other
surprises this night may bring.
299
00:16:00,620 --> 00:16:04,040
I don't remember the plots
of these things being so goofy.
300
00:16:04,207 --> 00:16:07,418
Mr. Wing wasn't mute last night.
301
00:16:09,003 --> 00:16:11,129
Six different roles in
six different accents?
302
00:16:11,213 --> 00:16:12,663
I've half a mind to walk out.
303
00:16:12,756 --> 00:16:14,925
Yes, I'm sorry, Niles,
but you're doing brilliantly.
304
00:16:15,009 --> 00:16:18,053
Except your…
Your Hans could be a bit gruffer.
305
00:16:18,220 --> 00:16:21,890
-Don't direct me.
-I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You're right.
306
00:16:21,974 --> 00:16:23,891
Right now, frankly, I'm
just a bit more worried
307
00:16:23,975 --> 00:16:25,768
-about being over time. Gil!
-GIL: Yes?
308
00:16:25,852 --> 00:16:28,146
At the bottom of page 14, listen,
309
00:16:28,313 --> 00:16:31,733
after you're shot, just say, "I'm dying."
Cut the rest.
310
00:16:32,650 --> 00:16:36,029
-That's my boyhood-in-Surrey speech.
-Yes, I know.
311
00:16:36,196 --> 00:16:40,199
-You can't cut that, you can't.
-Stop whining. We have a play to do.
312
00:16:40,365 --> 00:16:42,659
I don't care anymore.
313
00:16:43,827 --> 00:16:46,788
All right. Please, quiet, everybody.
Ten seconds.
314
00:16:46,955 --> 00:16:49,374
Oh, Maxine, be sure to
watch out for your cue,
315
00:16:49,541 --> 00:16:52,169
and please, people,
let's pick up the pace!
316
00:16:53,462 --> 00:16:55,630
[ORGAN MUSIC PLAYING]
317
00:16:55,838 --> 00:16:59,258
Nightmare Inn. Act Two.
318
00:16:59,425 --> 00:17:02,845
I was baffled. They all had alibis.
319
00:17:03,012 --> 00:17:07,016
Suddenly Miss Thorndyke
pointed, her eyes wide with alarm.
320
00:17:07,183 --> 00:17:09,101
There's someone outside the window!
321
00:17:09,267 --> 00:17:10,685
FRASIER: Why, yes, Miss Thorndyke.
322
00:17:10,769 --> 00:17:12,354
It appears to be…
323
00:17:12,521 --> 00:17:16,233
[CALLIOPE MUSIC PLAYING]
324
00:17:18,777 --> 00:17:21,112
…the ice cream truck.
325
00:17:23,573 --> 00:17:25,991
But never mind that.
326
00:17:27,117 --> 00:17:29,328
Suddenly…
327
00:17:29,495 --> 00:17:32,331
The storm put the lights out.
328
00:17:33,958 --> 00:17:37,294
And we were left in darkness.
329
00:17:37,711 --> 00:17:39,588
Then, a scream.
330
00:17:39,755 --> 00:17:44,842
Ah! Look out! He's got a nug!
331
00:17:52,225 --> 00:17:54,978
A gun!
332
00:17:55,144 --> 00:17:57,312
A gun is what he's got!
333
00:17:59,147 --> 00:18:00,899
When the lights came back up,
334
00:18:01,066 --> 00:18:02,818
a smoking gun lay on the table.
335
00:18:02,985 --> 00:18:06,530
The maid lay dead,
unable to name her killer,
336
00:18:06,697 --> 00:18:10,409
and Nigel Fairservice
lay mortally wounded.
337
00:18:10,576 --> 00:18:12,034
I'm dying.
338
00:18:12,201 --> 00:18:13,619
Poor man was gone.
339
00:18:13,786 --> 00:18:18,124
Never again to revisit the
scene of my boyhood in Surrey.
340
00:18:18,291 --> 00:18:22,003
Romping with my school
chums in the fens and spinneys…
341
00:18:22,169 --> 00:18:25,298
Just then, the lights went out again!
342
00:18:25,464 --> 00:18:27,966
Nigel Fairservice was shot again.
343
00:18:28,133 --> 00:18:30,176
Only grazed me.
344
00:18:31,636 --> 00:18:35,056
When the twilight bathed
the hedgerows like a lambent…
345
00:18:35,223 --> 00:18:39,060
The final bullet blew his
head clean off his shoulders.
346
00:18:42,855 --> 00:18:45,524
All right, people, let's try to keep calm.
347
00:18:45,691 --> 00:18:48,360
Although it's hard when
the killer is among us.
348
00:18:50,779 --> 00:18:53,449
Heigh-ho, I'm Nigel's brother, Cedric.
349
00:18:53,616 --> 00:18:56,869
I haven't seen him since our boyhood.
We'd romp…
350
00:18:58,077 --> 00:19:03,374
And so died the last surviving
member of the Fairservice family.
351
00:19:04,709 --> 00:19:07,045
Boy, I sure didn't see that one coming.
352
00:19:07,253 --> 00:19:08,296
[KNOCKING]
353
00:19:08,463 --> 00:19:10,172
GIL: Hello, I'm the ice cream man.
354
00:19:10,256 --> 00:19:13,592
Years ago I went to school
with Nigel Fairservice.
355
00:19:14,676 --> 00:19:17,387
We used to romp in the fens and spinneys…
356
00:19:17,471 --> 00:19:19,097
[BALLOON POPS]
357
00:19:21,433 --> 00:19:23,602
This is turning into a bloodbath.
358
00:19:24,811 --> 00:19:28,148
See, that's why I prefer TV.
You want to be able to see that stuff.
359
00:19:29,440 --> 00:19:34,403
By this time, I was more baffled
than ever, so I played a hunch.
360
00:19:34,570 --> 00:19:38,240
Hans, may I see your fingernails?
361
00:19:38,407 --> 00:19:41,035
-Why?
-They seem a bit ragged
362
00:19:41,202 --> 00:19:43,454
-for a butler.
-All right, all right,
363
00:19:43,621 --> 00:19:47,290
I'm not what I appear.
None of us is. I'm not a butler.
364
00:19:47,457 --> 00:19:48,958
I'm not even…
365
00:19:49,125 --> 00:19:50,168
German.
366
00:19:50,335 --> 00:19:52,087
[ORGAN MUSIC PLAYING]
367
00:19:53,463 --> 00:19:56,340
Sit down, Inspector.
You're about to hear a fascinating tale.
368
00:19:56,424 --> 00:19:59,219
Each of us holds a piece of the puzzle
369
00:19:59,386 --> 00:20:01,136
to relate to you. When we've finished,
370
00:20:01,220 --> 00:20:05,474
you'll know the full, dark
secret of Nightmare Inn.
371
00:20:05,641 --> 00:20:07,351
Are you sure we should, Hans?
372
00:20:09,561 --> 00:20:11,188
Be quiet, Mother.
373
00:20:11,355 --> 00:20:14,108
[ORGAN MUSIC PLAYING]
374
00:20:14,316 --> 00:20:17,735
Mother and I moved here
when I was a small boy after
375
00:20:18,194 --> 00:20:20,697
the tragic death of my father.
376
00:20:20,863 --> 00:20:23,866
I kept the pain of that
loss buried deep within me
377
00:20:24,033 --> 00:20:27,120
like a serpent coiled within a damp cave.
378
00:20:27,286 --> 00:20:28,371
Okay, that's it.
379
00:20:29,664 --> 00:20:30,956
Never mind all that.
380
00:20:31,123 --> 00:20:33,373
I'm just going to take
this gun off the table.
381
00:20:33,709 --> 00:20:35,009
Sorry about that, O'Toole.
382
00:20:35,168 --> 00:20:38,218
I guess we'll never hear your
fascinating piece of the puzzle.
383
00:20:39,381 --> 00:20:41,717
Or yours, Kragen and Peppo.
384
00:20:44,553 --> 00:20:46,637
Could the McCallister
sisters stand back-to-back?
385
00:20:46,721 --> 00:20:48,431
I'm short on bullets.
386
00:20:49,932 --> 00:20:51,100
Thank you.
387
00:20:51,267 --> 00:20:52,893
-What was your name?
-Miss Thorndyke.
388
00:20:52,977 --> 00:20:54,478
Thank you.
389
00:20:56,647 --> 00:20:58,733
And also Mr. Wing.
390
00:21:03,862 --> 00:21:06,281
And, of course, one
final bullet for myself,
391
00:21:06,448 --> 00:21:08,491
so the mystery will die with me.
392
00:21:08,908 --> 00:21:09,993
Ha.
393
00:21:20,544 --> 00:21:22,129
Well, then…
394
00:21:23,338 --> 00:21:25,674
That pretty much wrapped things up.
395
00:21:27,134 --> 00:21:31,180
Hans was a mass murderer,
to the surprise of everyone.
396
00:21:32,388 --> 00:21:36,225
Case was closed.
And with a grateful shudder,
397
00:21:36,392 --> 00:21:41,147
I swore I'd never return to Nightmare Inn.
398
00:21:41,773 --> 00:21:46,027
[ORGAN MUSIC PLAYING]
399
00:21:48,612 --> 00:21:53,450
Well, we still have, um…
400
00:21:54,951 --> 00:21:56,369
Nine minutes remaining.
401
00:22:01,416 --> 00:22:05,085
Perhaps we could have a
little post-play discussion.
402
00:22:12,718 --> 00:22:13,760
[THEME SONG PLAYING]
403
00:22:13,844 --> 00:22:16,820
♪ Hey, baby, I hear the blues a-callin' ♪
404
00:22:16,904 --> 00:22:19,473
♪ Tossed salads and scrambled eggs ♪
405
00:22:19,557 --> 00:22:20,558
Quite stylish.
406
00:22:20,642 --> 00:22:23,102
♪ And maybe I seem a bit confused ♪
407
00:22:23,186 --> 00:22:25,604
♪ Well, maybe, but I got you pegged ♪
408
00:22:25,688 --> 00:22:27,982
Ha, ha, ha, ha!
409
00:22:28,066 --> 00:22:29,817
♪ But I don't know what to do ♪
410
00:22:29,901 --> 00:22:33,112
♪ With those tossed salads
and scrambled eggs ♪
411
00:22:34,030 --> 00:22:36,197
♪ They're callin' again ♪
412
00:22:36,281 --> 00:22:38,367
Frasier has left the building.