1 00:00:09,344 --> 00:00:12,555 So I decided it was time I got to know some of my colleagues in the media. 2 00:00:12,639 --> 00:00:14,141 -But a convention? -Mm. 3 00:00:14,349 --> 00:00:15,975 You've never shown any interest before. 4 00:00:16,059 --> 00:00:18,061 They've never held one in Aspen before. 5 00:00:18,394 --> 00:00:22,940 Just think, hundreds of radio psychiatrists, all in the same location. 6 00:00:23,107 --> 00:00:24,400 One well-timed avalanche 7 00:00:24,567 --> 00:00:28,320 and the dignity of the entire psychiatric profession could be restored. 8 00:00:29,238 --> 00:00:30,656 [LAUGHS] 9 00:00:30,865 --> 00:00:32,867 Oh, good one. 10 00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:35,911 I can always count on you for some witty retort. 11 00:00:36,078 --> 00:00:37,579 I insult you, and you compliment me. 12 00:00:37,663 --> 00:00:39,665 Could the request for a favor be far behind? 13 00:00:39,749 --> 00:00:41,667 Damn. You are perceptive. 14 00:00:41,876 --> 00:00:44,170 -Oh, stop it. -Oh, all right. 15 00:00:44,336 --> 00:00:47,836 Listen, Niles, I'd like you to do my show for me for the week I'm gone. 16 00:00:48,215 --> 00:00:50,176 Me standing in for you? 17 00:00:50,342 --> 00:00:52,678 I'm sorry, Frasier, I couldn't presume to fill 18 00:00:52,845 --> 00:00:54,763 those big, floppy red shoes of yours. 19 00:00:56,097 --> 00:00:58,433 Please, please, Niles. Look, I'm begging you. 20 00:00:58,850 --> 00:01:01,352 The station wants to replace me with Helen Grogan, 21 00:01:01,519 --> 00:01:03,771 better known as Ma Nature. She does a gardening show, 22 00:01:03,855 --> 00:01:07,483 and I'm just a little worried that a week of discussing well-rotted manure 23 00:01:07,567 --> 00:01:09,611 will weaken my listener base. 24 00:01:10,445 --> 00:01:12,572 It hasn't yet. 25 00:01:14,449 --> 00:01:15,700 Very well. 26 00:01:15,867 --> 00:01:19,537 You leave me no alternative but to call in my marker. 27 00:01:22,248 --> 00:01:24,167 What marker? 28 00:01:25,001 --> 00:01:27,337 Oh, I think you know. 29 00:01:28,922 --> 00:01:30,840 -You wouldn't. -I would. 30 00:01:31,006 --> 00:01:32,090 -You can't. -I will. 31 00:01:32,257 --> 00:01:33,675 That was three years ago. 32 00:01:33,884 --> 00:01:36,553 I don't recall there being any statute of limitations. 33 00:01:37,763 --> 00:01:40,890 I distinctly recall that when you asked me to go out with Maris' sister, 34 00:01:40,974 --> 00:01:44,812 you said that you would owe me one forever. 35 00:01:45,813 --> 00:01:48,690 But you only spent one evening with Brie. 36 00:01:49,441 --> 00:01:52,191 That hardly compares to what you're asking me to endure. 37 00:01:52,653 --> 00:01:55,113 Shall I refresh your memory? 38 00:01:56,698 --> 00:02:01,745 Midway through the opera, her ermine muff began to tremble. 39 00:02:01,912 --> 00:02:03,455 As it turned out, she had used it 40 00:02:03,539 --> 00:02:06,500 to smuggle in her adorably incontinent Chihuahua. 41 00:02:07,333 --> 00:02:09,877 Just as I thought we'd reached the low point of the evening, 42 00:02:09,961 --> 00:02:14,257 I suddenly felt a sandpaper tongue licking my earlobe. 43 00:02:14,423 --> 00:02:18,094 Alas, it did not belong to little Hervé. 44 00:02:20,054 --> 00:02:24,767 Fortunately, my shriek coincided with the onstage murder of Gondalfo. 45 00:02:26,519 --> 00:02:29,438 Roz will expect you on Monday at 2:00. 46 00:02:30,565 --> 00:02:33,818 For your information, Brie had a very tough row to hoe growing up. 47 00:02:33,985 --> 00:02:37,572 It's not easy going through life with only one nostril. 48 00:02:39,949 --> 00:02:42,827 Did I mention she had a cold that night? 49 00:02:46,621 --> 00:02:49,332 Monday at 2:00 it is. 50 00:02:54,588 --> 00:02:57,089 WOMAN: We're at the point where all communication has broken down. 51 00:02:57,173 --> 00:02:58,841 -He won't even listen to me. -Linda. 52 00:02:58,925 --> 00:03:01,425 Do you how annoying that is, not to be listened to? 53 00:03:01,511 --> 00:03:03,263 -Linda. -It's driving me crazy. 54 00:03:03,430 --> 00:03:06,766 I was hoping maybe you would speak to him directly. 55 00:03:06,933 --> 00:03:08,184 Excuse me one moment. 56 00:03:09,060 --> 00:03:12,355 Thank you for the brilliant job of call-screening. How do I get out of this? 57 00:03:12,439 --> 00:03:15,817 Did you think of saying there are other callers on the line? 58 00:03:16,109 --> 00:03:18,359 Linda, I'd love to go into this in more depth, 59 00:03:18,445 --> 00:03:20,403 but, unfortunately, we're nearly out of time 60 00:03:20,487 --> 00:03:23,406 and Roz has lots of other callers waiting anxiously on the line. 61 00:03:23,490 --> 00:03:26,327 Actually, Dr Crane, all our lines are open. 62 00:03:27,620 --> 00:03:29,538 So you can talk to him? Good. 63 00:03:29,747 --> 00:03:31,414 I'm putting him on the line right now. 64 00:03:31,498 --> 00:03:33,584 -Go ahead. -All right. 65 00:03:34,001 --> 00:03:35,669 Murray, you're dealing with your problem 66 00:03:35,753 --> 00:03:37,379 in a very self-destructive manner. 67 00:03:37,463 --> 00:03:39,798 It won't be solved by refusing to eat. 68 00:03:39,965 --> 00:03:41,592 Do you hear me? 69 00:03:41,759 --> 00:03:43,427 [CAT MEOWS OVER PHONE] 70 00:03:44,887 --> 00:03:47,222 Oh, my God, it's working. He's eating. 71 00:03:47,389 --> 00:03:49,725 Dr Crane, what did you say to him? 72 00:03:49,892 --> 00:03:54,188 Well, I'd like to tell you, but that would violate doctor-cat confidentiality. 73 00:03:54,605 --> 00:03:56,730 Oh, well, Seattle, I'm afraid we're out of time. 74 00:03:56,814 --> 00:04:00,610 This is Dr Niles Crane, one down, four to go. See you tomorrow. 75 00:04:02,779 --> 00:04:05,114 That little bit of sabotage was not amusing. 76 00:04:05,323 --> 00:04:07,575 Then why did coffee come out of my nose? 77 00:04:10,495 --> 00:04:13,915 Hey, Dr Dolittle, I heard your show. 78 00:04:14,082 --> 00:04:17,251 -It didn't suck. -"Dear diary…" 79 00:04:17,418 --> 00:04:18,670 So how's it feel? 80 00:04:19,629 --> 00:04:21,529 Like I'm walking away from my lamppost 81 00:04:21,631 --> 00:04:23,967 and counting the bills in my garter belt. 82 00:04:24,175 --> 00:04:25,635 [WHISTLE BLOWS] 83 00:04:25,802 --> 00:04:28,470 Okay, both of you get out of here. I gotta set up for my show. 84 00:04:28,554 --> 00:04:31,724 I got Reggie MacLemore on my show today. Don't ask me why. 85 00:04:31,933 --> 00:04:34,767 -I wasn't even going to ask who. -He's a guard for the Sonics. 86 00:04:34,851 --> 00:04:37,501 He used to be unstoppable. Twenty points a game, easy. 87 00:04:37,646 --> 00:04:38,981 Now he's in the tank. 88 00:04:39,189 --> 00:04:41,108 Just what I need on my show, a loser. 89 00:04:41,274 --> 00:04:42,776 Oh, look, there he is now. 90 00:04:42,943 --> 00:04:44,777 What an overpaid, worthless piece of… 91 00:04:44,861 --> 00:04:49,449 -Hey, Reggie, my man! -What's up? How you doing, man? 92 00:04:49,992 --> 00:04:52,827 You never call me unless you need tickets, man. What's up with that? 93 00:04:52,911 --> 00:04:54,371 [YELLS] 94 00:04:54,538 --> 00:04:55,998 I love this guy. 95 00:04:56,957 --> 00:04:59,209 Reggie MacLemore, Roz Doyle. 96 00:04:59,376 --> 00:05:02,421 -Hi. I'm a big fan of yours. -Thanks. 97 00:05:02,629 --> 00:05:05,882 I'd introduce you to this guy, but he doesn't know squat about sports. 98 00:05:05,966 --> 00:05:08,718 On the contrary. In prep school, I was an ardent sportsman. 99 00:05:08,802 --> 00:05:12,513 Until an inflamed instep forced me to resign from the croquet club. 100 00:05:15,766 --> 00:05:17,601 I'll see myself out. 101 00:05:17,768 --> 00:05:19,603 Oh, hey, wait a minute. You're the shrink. 102 00:05:19,687 --> 00:05:21,731 I heard you in my car on the way over. 103 00:05:21,897 --> 00:05:23,691 Dr Niles Crane. It's a pleasure. 104 00:05:23,899 --> 00:05:26,818 Doc, wait. You sounded like you really know what you're talking about. 105 00:05:26,902 --> 00:05:29,196 Anyway, there's this sort of problem I've been having, 106 00:05:29,280 --> 00:05:31,490 and I was wondering… Maybe you could help me out. 107 00:05:31,574 --> 00:05:32,742 Well, what is it? 108 00:05:33,159 --> 00:05:35,619 Well, you see, for the last two weeks, 109 00:05:35,786 --> 00:05:39,331 every time I get my hands on the pill, I choke. 110 00:05:40,166 --> 00:05:43,544 Well, have you tried mashing it with a spoon? 111 00:05:44,295 --> 00:05:46,337 You don't watch much basketball, do you? 112 00:05:46,504 --> 00:05:49,549 It's my game, man. Because of me, we've lost six in a row. 113 00:05:50,008 --> 00:05:52,635 Oh, well, I'm not very well versed in sports psychology, 114 00:05:52,719 --> 00:05:54,720 but I could certainly schedule a session. 115 00:05:54,804 --> 00:05:57,974 No, no, I need something fast, man. We got Phoenix tonight. 116 00:05:58,266 --> 00:06:00,434 This is highly irregular, but since you're pressed, 117 00:06:00,518 --> 00:06:02,061 there are exercises I could suggest. 118 00:06:02,145 --> 00:06:03,437 Oh, great, man. Thanks, man. 119 00:06:03,521 --> 00:06:05,940 You know what, just name it. Tickets to any game you want. 120 00:06:06,024 --> 00:06:08,610 Nothing wrong with your sense of humor. Have a seat. 121 00:06:10,612 --> 00:06:12,864 We'll start with a positive visualization. 122 00:06:13,031 --> 00:06:15,617 I want you to close your eyes, take a deep breath. 123 00:06:15,784 --> 00:06:17,786 [INHALES, EXHALES] 124 00:06:17,994 --> 00:06:21,914 Good. Now, I want you to imagine yourself on the playing surface, 125 00:06:22,081 --> 00:06:24,958 doing whatever it is you actually do. 126 00:06:25,125 --> 00:06:26,752 Tell me what you see. 127 00:06:26,919 --> 00:06:30,089 -Okay. Kemp's passing me the ball. -Mm-hmm. 128 00:06:30,255 --> 00:06:32,299 -I'm bringing it up court. -Mm-hmm. 129 00:06:32,466 --> 00:06:35,066 -I'm dribbling. -Don't worry about your appearance. 130 00:06:37,179 --> 00:06:38,979 Start again, and I'll just be quiet. 131 00:06:40,849 --> 00:06:43,894 -Can I ask you a favor? -Yeah, forget it, he's married. 132 00:06:44,061 --> 00:06:46,271 Hey, that's pretty offensive. 133 00:06:46,438 --> 00:06:48,440 Why do you assume that's what I wanted? 134 00:06:48,607 --> 00:06:50,818 Okay, then, what did you want? 135 00:06:50,984 --> 00:06:52,610 Well, I don't know, I just wanted to… 136 00:06:52,694 --> 00:06:53,737 [HORN HONKS] 137 00:06:53,904 --> 00:06:54,988 Time's up. 138 00:06:55,197 --> 00:06:59,200 Oh, by the way, if you're so hungry for some good-looking, athletic guy, 139 00:06:59,367 --> 00:07:01,035 why won't you go out with me? 140 00:07:01,369 --> 00:07:04,872 If you're not at least this tall, you can't go on this ride. 141 00:07:07,333 --> 00:07:09,877 This next exercise is designed to block negative feelings. 142 00:07:09,961 --> 00:07:12,296 I've tried it myself. Simply take a moment, 143 00:07:12,505 --> 00:07:15,007 think of something comforting from childhood: 144 00:07:15,174 --> 00:07:18,344 A stuffed animal, a dog-eared copy of Middle march. 145 00:07:19,804 --> 00:07:21,556 You may have other memories. 146 00:07:21,764 --> 00:07:23,099 Come on, Reggie, shake it. 147 00:07:23,307 --> 00:07:26,101 I gotta run. Hey, but thanks a lot, Doc. I'll give it a try. 148 00:07:26,185 --> 00:07:29,897 Okay. Oh, wait, I saw this. It has steps, right? 149 00:07:32,066 --> 00:07:34,026 Later, man. 150 00:07:35,235 --> 00:07:36,403 [CHEERING ON TV] 151 00:07:36,570 --> 00:07:39,113 -You know, according to this article… -No, quiet. 152 00:07:39,197 --> 00:07:42,993 That's three seconds. Come on, he's camping out in the middle. 153 00:07:43,201 --> 00:07:46,663 No, don't double the ball. They'll just swing it around for a three. 154 00:07:47,164 --> 00:07:49,666 There it is. Just like I said. 155 00:07:49,875 --> 00:07:51,585 Oh! 156 00:07:52,586 --> 00:07:55,964 Oh, timeout. Sure, now you listen to me. 157 00:07:57,174 --> 00:07:59,592 You believe this? Two minutes ago, we were up six points… 158 00:07:59,676 --> 00:08:02,304 Shh! Quiet. This is my favorite commercial. 159 00:08:03,597 --> 00:08:08,226 No, don't pick that floor cleaner. It'll give your floors waxy build-up. 160 00:08:08,435 --> 00:08:11,896 No, don't do it. Don't do it! Dahh! 161 00:08:15,149 --> 00:08:16,609 It's completely different. 162 00:08:16,775 --> 00:08:18,068 [DOORBELL RINGS] 163 00:08:18,235 --> 00:08:19,403 There's Dr Crane. 164 00:08:19,570 --> 00:08:23,782 It'll be a pleasure to be around one man who's not obsessed with sports. 165 00:08:25,075 --> 00:08:26,368 -Hello, Daphne. -Hello. 166 00:08:26,535 --> 00:08:28,370 Oh, the Sonics are on, excuse me. 167 00:08:28,537 --> 00:08:30,080 -So, Dad… -Hold it, Niles. 168 00:08:30,247 --> 00:08:31,748 There's only nine seconds to go. 169 00:08:31,832 --> 00:08:33,542 -What's the score? -What do you care? 170 00:08:33,626 --> 00:08:35,293 No, get it to MacLemore, to MacLemore. 171 00:08:35,377 --> 00:08:36,754 He's got the hot hand. 172 00:08:37,129 --> 00:08:39,089 Yes! Come on, Reggie! 173 00:08:39,298 --> 00:08:42,134 Unbelievable. Sonics win! 174 00:08:42,343 --> 00:08:45,554 -This is fantastic. You know, Dad… -Wait, wait. I wanna see the replay. 175 00:08:45,638 --> 00:08:47,597 No, get it to MacLemore. 176 00:08:47,805 --> 00:08:49,515 Unbelievable! 177 00:08:51,768 --> 00:08:54,645 -You might be interested to know… -Quiet, I wanna see the interview. 178 00:08:54,729 --> 00:08:56,105 REPORTER [ON TV]: Reggie, got a minute? 179 00:08:56,189 --> 00:08:58,607 Great game tonight. Seems like your slump is over. 180 00:08:58,691 --> 00:09:00,693 Yeah, I was really feeling it out there tonight. 181 00:09:00,777 --> 00:09:02,904 What turned it around for you? 182 00:09:03,238 --> 00:09:05,865 Well, I was having a little problem getting my head together, 183 00:09:05,949 --> 00:09:08,659 but this radio shrink really helped me out. Dr Niles Crane. 184 00:09:08,743 --> 00:09:11,204 -Well, good luck against Utah. -Thanks a lot. 185 00:09:11,371 --> 00:09:12,997 Let's send it back upstairs. 186 00:09:15,250 --> 00:09:16,876 [TV CLICKS OFF] 187 00:09:17,335 --> 00:09:18,503 You? 188 00:09:18,795 --> 00:09:19,921 [LAUGHS] 189 00:09:20,088 --> 00:09:23,215 -Is that so hard to believe? -Yeah. 190 00:09:23,715 --> 00:09:26,802 -When did you talk to him? -He was on Bulldog's show today. 191 00:09:27,010 --> 00:09:29,846 We had a brief session in the hallway. Not more than two minutes. 192 00:09:29,930 --> 00:09:32,557 You turned Reggie's game around in only two minutes? 193 00:09:32,724 --> 00:09:34,601 Well, you could be a little less surprised. 194 00:09:34,685 --> 00:09:36,728 I am a skilled psychiatrist. 195 00:09:36,895 --> 00:09:40,899 After 16 years in the field, I have developed certain instincts. 196 00:09:41,108 --> 00:09:42,901 I gotta say, I'm impressed. 197 00:09:43,110 --> 00:09:45,570 DAPHNE: I'm starting to think maybe I should spend an hour or two 198 00:09:45,654 --> 00:09:47,906 on the couch with you. 199 00:09:48,865 --> 00:09:51,615 Are you kidding? With Niles, it'd only take two minutes. 200 00:09:57,791 --> 00:09:59,709 Thanks, Dad. 201 00:10:03,462 --> 00:10:05,631 HOOPLA 202 00:10:05,798 --> 00:10:07,717 -[PHONE RINGS] -[FOOTSTEPS] 203 00:10:07,967 --> 00:10:10,553 Hey, Doc, great job. Go Sonics. 204 00:10:10,720 --> 00:10:14,181 -You're the man. -Thank you. Same to you. 205 00:10:14,432 --> 00:10:16,225 [MOUTHING] Way to go. 206 00:10:16,517 --> 00:10:18,978 Heavens, I need a clip and a buff. 207 00:10:21,188 --> 00:10:23,274 There he is, the toast of Seattle. 208 00:10:23,482 --> 00:10:26,526 You know you made the sports section of the paper this morning? 209 00:10:26,610 --> 00:10:30,114 Yes, I'd heard. I must admit, I find this all a bit mystifying. 210 00:10:30,281 --> 00:10:32,783 Do people really care this much about a basketball game? 211 00:10:32,867 --> 00:10:35,952 Are you kidding? This is Seattle. It rains nine months out of the year. 212 00:10:36,036 --> 00:10:38,330 We take our indoor sports very seriously. 213 00:10:38,538 --> 00:10:40,665 Well, I know you always have. 214 00:10:42,250 --> 00:10:45,128 You're a hero today, so I'm gonna let that one go. 215 00:10:45,337 --> 00:10:48,840 Pucker up, baby, I'm planting a big, wet one on you. 216 00:10:49,132 --> 00:10:51,009 Mwah! 217 00:10:52,218 --> 00:10:56,431 Well, there's a layer of skin I'll be exfoliating this evening. 218 00:10:57,682 --> 00:11:02,020 -I had 200 bucks on the Sonics. -Two hundred? Isn't gambling illegal? 219 00:11:02,187 --> 00:11:03,855 -Isn't he the cutest? -Oh, yes. 220 00:11:04,481 --> 00:11:05,857 -Down. Down. -Okay. 221 00:11:06,024 --> 00:11:08,025 I hope you don't feel this way about chicks. 222 00:11:08,109 --> 00:11:10,778 I got one of those Sonics cheerleaders coming on my show today, 223 00:11:10,862 --> 00:11:12,462 and she really wants to see you. 224 00:11:12,613 --> 00:11:15,407 Believe it or not, Bulldog, not every man's dream woman 225 00:11:15,616 --> 00:11:18,702 is a pompom-shaking, half-time halfwit. 226 00:11:18,911 --> 00:11:20,496 Is she the head cheerleader? 227 00:11:21,121 --> 00:11:23,832 Yeah, and she's coming in costume. 228 00:11:24,041 --> 00:11:26,502 Of course she is. It's radio. 229 00:11:29,880 --> 00:11:31,506 Look at these faxes that came for you. 230 00:11:31,590 --> 00:11:33,342 Faxes? 231 00:11:34,093 --> 00:11:36,345 "Seattle thanks you." 232 00:11:37,388 --> 00:11:40,599 "You're the Sonics' MVP." 233 00:11:40,808 --> 00:11:43,018 -Most valuable player. -Oh! 234 00:11:45,270 --> 00:11:46,563 "You're a genius." 235 00:11:46,730 --> 00:11:50,080 With the less-common J spelling. But still, his point is well taken. 236 00:11:50,441 --> 00:11:52,735 I bet you're feeling pretty good about yourself. 237 00:11:52,819 --> 00:11:55,362 Suddenly I'm being revered as a god by the same troglodytes 238 00:11:55,446 --> 00:11:58,615 who in junior high school tried to pack me into my own briefcase. 239 00:11:58,699 --> 00:12:00,576 It's glorious. 240 00:12:00,785 --> 00:12:02,703 Oh, I almost forgot the best part. 241 00:12:03,037 --> 00:12:06,207 Reggie sent these tickets for tonight's game over. 242 00:12:06,624 --> 00:12:09,252 Well, I suppose I can't disappoint my new fans. 243 00:12:09,419 --> 00:12:11,569 Tell me, does one still wear a white sweater 244 00:12:11,671 --> 00:12:13,589 jauntily tied around the neck to these things? 245 00:12:13,673 --> 00:12:16,801 If one wants to get the crap beat out of one. 246 00:12:18,636 --> 00:12:21,222 -Hey. -Dad. What a surprise. 247 00:12:21,431 --> 00:12:23,182 I'm not interrupting or anything, am I? 248 00:12:23,266 --> 00:12:25,683 -No, come in. Is everything all right? -Oh, sure, sure. 249 00:12:25,767 --> 00:12:27,477 I was just having lunch at McGinty's, 250 00:12:27,561 --> 00:12:29,687 and some of the guys would really like to meet you, 251 00:12:29,771 --> 00:12:32,732 and I was hoping that after your show, you could stop in for a drink. 252 00:12:32,816 --> 00:12:36,403 I mean, I wouldn't ask you, but some of these guys are my best buddies. 253 00:12:36,611 --> 00:12:39,280 Actually, Dad, Reggie sent over these tickets to tonight's game, 254 00:12:39,364 --> 00:12:41,449 and I was going to ask you to go, but since… 255 00:12:41,533 --> 00:12:44,077 The hell with those guys. I'm there. 256 00:12:44,703 --> 00:12:47,789 I have to tell you, I'm finding all this attention a bit overwhelming. 257 00:12:47,873 --> 00:12:51,126 Oh, come on, you deserve it. You're a hero. 258 00:12:51,334 --> 00:12:53,461 Perhaps it's time we put all this into perspective. 259 00:12:53,545 --> 00:12:55,588 The only real heroes are the fine athletes 260 00:12:55,672 --> 00:12:57,799 who worked so hard for two hours to win that game. 261 00:12:57,883 --> 00:12:59,683 My contribution was minimal at best. 262 00:13:00,051 --> 00:13:01,427 What did I tell you, Doc? 263 00:13:01,594 --> 00:13:03,595 Which of you won the game for us last night? 264 00:13:03,679 --> 00:13:05,264 That would be me. 265 00:13:08,976 --> 00:13:11,645 AY, THERE'S THE RUB 266 00:13:11,854 --> 00:13:13,189 [CHATTERING] 267 00:13:13,564 --> 00:13:16,692 Nice talking to you too. Enjoy the game. 268 00:13:17,318 --> 00:13:20,571 Dad, it really isn't necessary to tell everyone we bump into 269 00:13:20,738 --> 00:13:24,388 [RAISED VOICE] that I'm the one Reggie credited with last night's victory. 270 00:13:24,533 --> 00:13:28,787 -That was you? -Yeah, yeah, it's my son, Niles Crane. 271 00:13:31,790 --> 00:13:33,333 They must've sold too many tickets. 272 00:13:33,417 --> 00:13:35,503 They've stuck us in these folding chairs. 273 00:13:35,669 --> 00:13:40,381 Wow, we're right on the hardwood, five feet from the baseline. 274 00:13:40,673 --> 00:13:41,841 [CHUCKLES] 275 00:13:42,467 --> 00:13:46,095 -Like front-row orchestra, stage right. -Oh. 276 00:13:46,804 --> 00:13:50,642 Oh, man, we're so close we're gonna hear teeth rattle when they set a pick. 277 00:13:50,975 --> 00:13:52,685 [CHUCKLES] 278 00:13:52,894 --> 00:13:56,481 It's like sitting close enough to get hit by Placido Domingo's spit. 279 00:13:56,648 --> 00:13:57,732 Oh. 280 00:13:58,650 --> 00:14:01,778 -REGGIE: Hey, hey, N.C., you made it. -I beg your pardon? 281 00:14:01,945 --> 00:14:04,572 Oh, "N.C." I thought you said "nancy." 282 00:14:05,156 --> 00:14:08,356 For a second it was prep school all over again. Let me introduce. 283 00:14:08,451 --> 00:14:09,994 Reggie MacLemore, Daphne Moon. 284 00:14:10,161 --> 00:14:11,329 -Hello. -And this… 285 00:14:11,496 --> 00:14:13,830 Hi. Marty Crane. Niles' dad. 286 00:14:14,039 --> 00:14:15,290 Yeah, I'm a big fan. 287 00:14:15,457 --> 00:14:17,667 I want you to know, I never lost faith in you. 288 00:14:17,751 --> 00:14:20,753 Not when you were in your slump, not when you tanked it in the playoffs, 289 00:14:20,837 --> 00:14:25,050 not even when all my friends were calling you Reggie Hack-Lemore. 290 00:14:25,717 --> 00:14:27,135 What? 291 00:14:27,302 --> 00:14:28,845 You know, this might be a good time 292 00:14:28,929 --> 00:14:31,222 to try that negative-thought-blocking exercise. 293 00:14:31,306 --> 00:14:34,100 Yeah, okay. Look, you guys enjoy the game. I'll see you afterwards. 294 00:14:34,184 --> 00:14:37,187 -All right. Make me proud. -Go Sonics. 295 00:14:38,647 --> 00:14:40,482 [HORN BLOWS] 296 00:14:40,732 --> 00:14:43,318 -What the hell was that? -That's the end of the shoot around. 297 00:14:43,402 --> 00:14:46,863 The coach is about to send the starting five in for the tip-off. 298 00:14:47,030 --> 00:14:50,491 -The stage manager just called places. -Oh. 299 00:14:51,200 --> 00:14:52,368 [AUDIENCE BOOS] 300 00:14:52,535 --> 00:14:53,786 [WHISTLE BLOWS] 301 00:14:53,953 --> 00:14:57,331 ANNOUNCER: Foul on the rebound, MacLemore. 302 00:14:57,498 --> 00:15:00,248 I gather Reggie's not performing up to par this evening. 303 00:15:00,334 --> 00:15:02,085 Oh, you got that from all the booing, huh? 304 00:15:02,169 --> 00:15:05,423 Nice counseling job. He's been throwing up bricks all night. 305 00:15:05,590 --> 00:15:07,758 Judging from that empty tureen of nachos and cheese, 306 00:15:07,842 --> 00:15:09,802 you may be joining him. 307 00:15:10,136 --> 00:15:12,847 ANNOUNCER: Malone to the line to shoot two. 308 00:15:13,014 --> 00:15:15,265 Doc, you gotta help me out. I don't know what's wrong. 309 00:15:15,349 --> 00:15:17,768 Perhaps you've forgotten my advice. Let's review quickly. 310 00:15:17,852 --> 00:15:19,895 Did you empty your mind of negative thoughts? 311 00:15:19,979 --> 00:15:21,271 -Yeah. -The imaging exercises? 312 00:15:21,355 --> 00:15:23,941 Yeah, yeah, I did them. What else did you tell me to do? 313 00:15:24,025 --> 00:15:26,401 Nothing. Bulldog called you, you ran back in. 314 00:15:26,568 --> 00:15:29,320 No, no, wait. Now, right before that, I rubbed your head. 315 00:15:29,404 --> 00:15:31,322 I remember because my hand smelled like peach 316 00:15:31,406 --> 00:15:34,367 and I thought, "What the hell does this guy wash his hair with?" 317 00:15:34,451 --> 00:15:37,787 Well, you can't possibly think that my head is some sort of lucky charm. 318 00:15:37,871 --> 00:15:40,123 Well, we'll know in a minute. 319 00:15:43,084 --> 00:15:46,087 I saw you talking to Reggie again. Hope you gave him some more advice. 320 00:15:46,171 --> 00:15:47,922 I tried to, but he has this absurd idea… 321 00:15:48,006 --> 00:15:49,716 No, wait, wait, wait. 322 00:15:50,300 --> 00:15:51,509 [CROWD CHEERING] 323 00:15:51,676 --> 00:15:53,470 ANNOUNCER: MacLemore for three. 324 00:15:54,262 --> 00:15:56,162 Unbelievable. What did you say to him? 325 00:15:56,264 --> 00:15:58,015 I didn't say anything he could possibly… 326 00:15:58,099 --> 00:16:00,018 Look, look, look, he stole the ball. 327 00:16:00,185 --> 00:16:01,311 [CROWD CHEERING] 328 00:16:01,478 --> 00:16:03,061 ANNOUNCER: MacLemore, three more. 329 00:16:03,145 --> 00:16:05,648 Oh, Dr Crane, you're a miracle worker. 330 00:16:05,814 --> 00:16:07,358 What did you say to him? 331 00:16:07,524 --> 00:16:10,861 Oh, just something off the top of my head. 332 00:16:11,737 --> 00:16:14,531 ANNOUNCER: Timeout, Utah. 333 00:16:15,240 --> 00:16:16,659 [DOOR SHUTS] 334 00:16:18,118 --> 00:16:19,370 Oh, isn't this nice. 335 00:16:19,536 --> 00:16:21,872 Dr Crane sent us a postcard from Aspen. 336 00:16:22,039 --> 00:16:23,832 Great. How's he doing? 337 00:16:23,999 --> 00:16:25,167 Let's see. 338 00:16:25,334 --> 00:16:27,878 "I delivered a speech at the conference last night. 339 00:16:28,087 --> 00:16:30,881 "I was especially pleased with my opening line:" 340 00:16:31,090 --> 00:16:34,718 " 'My fellow psychiatrists. As I watched you on the slopes today," 341 00:16:34,885 --> 00:16:39,430 "I realized I've never seen so many Freudians slip.' " 342 00:16:44,477 --> 00:16:46,145 "As hard as you're laughing now," 343 00:16:46,312 --> 00:16:49,565 "imagine the thunder of an auditorium of colleagues." 344 00:16:49,732 --> 00:16:51,901 Well, see you Saturday. Frasier." 345 00:16:52,985 --> 00:16:57,073 Well, I better get going. I'm meeting Joe at the movies. 346 00:16:57,281 --> 00:16:59,381 Oh, bloody hell, it's later than I thought. 347 00:16:59,534 --> 00:17:02,161 -MARTIN: Enjoy. -Yeah. Enjoy your game. 348 00:17:02,495 --> 00:17:05,123 Oh, Dr Crane, have fun at the game. 349 00:17:05,289 --> 00:17:08,042 -I'm afraid we won't be going. -Oh, that's too bad. 350 00:17:08,251 --> 00:17:10,101 -Do you wanna know why? -Not really. 351 00:17:13,131 --> 00:17:15,882 MARTIN: VIP parking. Uh-huh. 352 00:17:17,217 --> 00:17:21,221 Yeah, that's courtside, pal. Yeah, right on the hardwood. 353 00:17:21,471 --> 00:17:23,140 Yeah, swear to God. 354 00:17:23,348 --> 00:17:26,398 And Reggie said the seats are ours for the rest of the season. 355 00:17:27,352 --> 00:17:31,148 I believe it's what they call "living large." 356 00:17:32,733 --> 00:17:35,360 I don't know. Somewhere on TV. 357 00:17:35,569 --> 00:17:38,321 Yeah. Yeah, okay. Yeah, I gotta go. Bye. 358 00:17:38,488 --> 00:17:39,781 Let's go, Niles. 359 00:17:40,073 --> 00:17:41,908 You know, Dad, I was thinking, 360 00:17:42,075 --> 00:17:43,743 maybe we shouldn't go to the game today. 361 00:17:43,827 --> 00:17:45,829 [LAUGHS] 362 00:17:46,246 --> 00:17:49,248 Hey, you know what I was thinking? Maybe we shouldn't go to any of them. 363 00:17:49,332 --> 00:17:52,042 [LAUGHS] 364 00:17:52,460 --> 00:17:54,586 You know, that's one of the best things about this. 365 00:17:54,670 --> 00:17:56,963 When was the last time you and I joked like this? 366 00:17:57,047 --> 00:17:59,508 Well, we better get going, because it's late. 367 00:17:59,675 --> 00:18:01,469 Last night at the game… 368 00:18:01,635 --> 00:18:04,305 Did you happen to notice when Reggie tousled my hair? 369 00:18:04,513 --> 00:18:05,765 Yeah, yeah. Let's go. 370 00:18:05,931 --> 00:18:09,852 Well, somehow, some way, he's convinced himself that 371 00:18:10,019 --> 00:18:12,419 that's what he needs to do in order to play well. 372 00:18:12,563 --> 00:18:14,439 Oh, well, can't we talk about it in the car? 373 00:18:14,523 --> 00:18:16,566 It has nothing to do with any advice I've given. 374 00:18:16,650 --> 00:18:18,486 It's all some bizarre superstition, 375 00:18:18,652 --> 00:18:22,156 and Reggie wants to rub my head again before today's game. 376 00:18:22,615 --> 00:18:25,515 Well, you know, a lot of athletes have weird superstitions. 377 00:18:25,618 --> 00:18:28,536 Yes, but I'm a psychiatrist. 378 00:18:29,496 --> 00:18:31,455 I can't let people think I'm treating the man 379 00:18:31,539 --> 00:18:34,375 when all I am is a rabbit's foot. 380 00:18:34,542 --> 00:18:37,002 I'd be taking credit for something I don't deserve. 381 00:18:37,086 --> 00:18:40,423 Okay. What would you be taking credit for? Helping him. 382 00:18:40,632 --> 00:18:44,302 What are you doing? Helping him. I'm getting my coat. 383 00:18:44,511 --> 00:18:47,138 But I wouldn't be helping him as a psychiatrist. 384 00:18:47,305 --> 00:18:50,391 Oh, that's what's bugging you? People thinking you're a good psychiatrist? 385 00:18:50,475 --> 00:18:52,309 -Exactly. -Are you a good psychiatrist? 386 00:18:52,393 --> 00:18:54,813 -Yes. -I'm getting my coat. 387 00:18:55,271 --> 00:18:57,732 Dad, Dad, I'm sorry. 388 00:18:58,399 --> 00:18:59,776 We're not going. 389 00:19:00,443 --> 00:19:05,614 Oh, man, I knew you'd find some way to ruin this. 390 00:19:05,781 --> 00:19:07,115 Dad. 391 00:19:07,282 --> 00:19:10,869 Courtside season tickets. VIP parking. 392 00:19:11,036 --> 00:19:12,120 Dad. 393 00:19:12,287 --> 00:19:14,998 No, no, you've gotta have your reasons. 394 00:19:15,165 --> 00:19:20,379 "It's my ethics. It's my integrity. It's my allergies." 395 00:19:21,171 --> 00:19:24,424 Well, that's it. I'm never getting my hopes up again. 396 00:19:24,633 --> 00:19:26,509 Dad, you can still watch the game on TV. 397 00:19:26,593 --> 00:19:29,221 I don't wanna watch it on TV. 398 00:19:29,596 --> 00:19:32,891 -I'll get you a beer. -I don't like beer. 399 00:19:33,809 --> 00:19:36,270 Dad, you know I'm right. 400 00:19:39,773 --> 00:19:42,942 Will you look me in the eye and answer me one question? 401 00:19:43,234 --> 00:19:47,530 Would you still be doing this if these were courtside seats at the opera? 402 00:19:48,906 --> 00:19:50,741 Yes. 403 00:19:51,158 --> 00:19:52,743 My ethics are my ethics. 404 00:19:52,952 --> 00:19:55,454 And by the way, where do you think I got those ethics? 405 00:19:55,538 --> 00:19:58,416 Oh, yeah, throw it back at me. 406 00:19:58,583 --> 00:20:00,793 That's real mature. 407 00:20:08,301 --> 00:20:10,001 I'd like to talk to Mr. MacLemore. 408 00:20:10,094 --> 00:20:13,306 -Who wants to see him? -Just tell him N.C. is here. 409 00:20:13,514 --> 00:20:16,100 Nancy? 410 00:20:19,269 --> 00:20:21,646 No, N.C. 411 00:20:25,150 --> 00:20:27,068 What is so hard about that? 412 00:20:30,196 --> 00:20:33,157 Damn, man, where've you been? I gotta be on the court in five minutes. 413 00:20:33,241 --> 00:20:35,577 I know, I know. Stop. 414 00:20:36,411 --> 00:20:39,289 Before you rub your hands all over me, we need to talk. 415 00:20:39,581 --> 00:20:41,666 -REGGIE: What's up? -Well, I'll come right to the point. 416 00:20:41,750 --> 00:20:45,629 This entire affair has grown out of control. I need to end it. 417 00:20:45,837 --> 00:20:47,922 What are you saying, you're not coming anymore? 418 00:20:48,006 --> 00:20:49,257 Well, no. 419 00:20:49,424 --> 00:20:53,260 We can still see each other to talk, but no touching. 420 00:20:54,929 --> 00:20:57,806 That part of our relationship is over. 421 00:20:58,557 --> 00:21:02,144 -Does this concern you? -It's starting to. 422 00:21:03,395 --> 00:21:06,774 -All right, come on, dude. -No. Now, listen. 423 00:21:06,941 --> 00:21:09,443 Do you really expect me to drop what I'm doing 424 00:21:09,610 --> 00:21:10,986 and race down here every day 425 00:21:11,070 --> 00:21:14,031 just so you can run your fingers over my head? 426 00:21:14,531 --> 00:21:16,241 Yeah. 427 00:21:17,368 --> 00:21:18,702 Listen to me closely. 428 00:21:18,911 --> 00:21:21,830 You are a gifted athlete with tremendous skill. 429 00:21:22,081 --> 00:21:25,709 Marshal your talents. Concentrate. Focus. 430 00:21:25,876 --> 00:21:29,879 The key to your success is to trust your own God-given ability. 431 00:21:30,088 --> 00:21:31,788 It has nothing to do with my head. 432 00:21:32,256 --> 00:21:34,550 -It must be your hair. -Will you stop it. 433 00:21:34,717 --> 00:21:38,846 -You're obsessing. -Come on, man, just let me touch it. 434 00:21:41,849 --> 00:21:43,434 No. 435 00:21:44,060 --> 00:21:45,728 You have to look at this logically. 436 00:21:45,812 --> 00:21:47,438 I can't come down here for every game, 437 00:21:47,522 --> 00:21:50,065 and I certainly can't go with you when the team is on tour. 438 00:21:50,149 --> 00:21:51,943 This is not a long-term solution. 439 00:21:52,151 --> 00:21:54,070 What you need is legitimate therapy. 440 00:21:54,278 --> 00:21:55,696 If you wanna start, come inside. 441 00:21:55,780 --> 00:21:58,741 I'll give you a quick session, we can proceed from there. 442 00:21:59,075 --> 00:22:02,578 Yeah, you're right, Doc. I mean, what I need is a long-term solution. 443 00:22:02,787 --> 00:22:04,372 Good. 444 00:22:04,706 --> 00:22:06,832 Yo, Frank, let me see those scissors. 445 00:22:06,999 --> 00:22:09,001 Coming, Doc.