1
00:00:02,197 --> 00:00:04,199
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
2
00:00:08,954 --> 00:00:11,206
[FIRE ALARM BEEPING]
3
00:00:11,290 --> 00:00:15,043
FRASIER: Oh, my God! Fire! Fire!
4
00:00:15,127 --> 00:00:18,463
Eddie! Eddie! Where are you, boy?
5
00:00:18,547 --> 00:00:20,799
FRASIER: Dad, wake up!
Dad, are you in there?
6
00:00:20,883 --> 00:00:24,302
-Eddie! Here, Eddie!
-Dad! Dad, where are you?
7
00:00:24,386 --> 00:00:25,720
-Have you seen Eddie?
-No!
8
00:00:25,804 --> 00:00:28,056
What's burning? Where is the fire?
9
00:00:28,140 --> 00:00:31,351
-Eddie!
-It's all right! It's all right!
10
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False alarm. The one over me bed went off.
11
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Thank God.
12
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DAPHNE: And don't worry about Eddie.
13
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He's back in my room.
Oh, the noise the bloody thing makes.
14
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It would be less upsetting
to just wake up on fire.
15
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-What the hell triggered it?
-Who knows?
16
00:00:48,578 --> 00:00:51,539
I was dozing quite peacefully
when it started screaming away
17
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for no reason at all.
18
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FRASIER: I see. What have we here? Eddie?
19
00:00:58,963 --> 00:01:01,466
You've been smoking in Daphne's bedroom.
Bad dog!
20
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I know, I know, you
have a no-smoking rule.
21
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I'm sorry.
22
00:01:07,514 --> 00:01:10,433
But every now and
again, I feel a bit tense,
23
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and I find a ciggy can be very soothing.
24
00:01:12,811 --> 00:01:14,478
Oh, yeah, it's real soothing.
25
00:01:14,562 --> 00:01:17,812
It should only be about an hour
until my heart stops fibrillating.
26
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Oh, it figures… 3 a.m.
27
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Of course this would happen on the night
before I have an early-morning meeting.
28
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-Daphne, aren't you going back to bed?
-No, I'll just sit up for a bit.
29
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I'm feeling a bit blue.
30
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Anything you'd like to talk about?
31
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No, no, you need your sleep.
32
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It's nothing important.
33
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Just this feeling that me
life's a gaping sinkhole
34
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and I'm just marking time while the
flower of me youth rots on the vine.
35
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Well, so long as you're sure.
36
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[WHIMPERS]
37
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I really wish you'd tell me about it.
38
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Well, if you must know, it's me love life.
39
00:02:04,155 --> 00:02:05,947
Really? You've been seeing a man?
40
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Only when I close me eyes and concentrate.
41
00:02:11,620 --> 00:02:13,872
I see. You're going through
a bit of a drought, eh?
42
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Small wonder.
43
00:02:15,708 --> 00:02:19,378
The rare times I do go out,
it's usually with your father.
44
00:02:19,462 --> 00:02:23,590
People see us and assume I'm
his daughter or else his girlfriend.
45
00:02:23,674 --> 00:02:27,052
Either way, it's like having me
own personal can of stud repellent.
46
00:02:27,136 --> 00:02:28,053
Hmm.
47
00:02:29,180 --> 00:02:32,432
Yes, well, I know how
bleak these times can be,
48
00:02:32,516 --> 00:02:34,768
but believe me, they come
to an end sooner or later.
49
00:02:34,852 --> 00:02:36,603
I remember a time back in Boston
50
00:02:36,687 --> 00:02:38,564
I was going through
what you're going through.
51
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Just a week later, I met a lovely barmaid,
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sophisticated, if a bit loquacious.
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We fell madly in love.
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We got engaged.
55
00:02:50,619 --> 00:02:52,829
Of course, she left
me standing at the altar,
56
00:02:52,913 --> 00:02:55,207
but the point is, I didn't give up.
57
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I took my poor, battered
heart and offered it to Lilith.
58
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She put it in her little Cuisinart
and hit the puree button.
59
00:03:08,637 --> 00:03:11,723
I rebounded. And look how far I've come.
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I'm divorced, lonely,
living with my father.
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[PEOPLE CHATTERING]
62
00:03:34,246 --> 00:03:36,372
You know, I figured I'd find you here.
63
00:03:36,456 --> 00:03:38,833
You know, you missed your
meeting with the new station manager.
64
00:03:38,917 --> 00:03:40,919
Oh, no, I completely forgot.
65
00:03:41,003 --> 00:03:44,298
God, you look like you've been
ridden hard and put away wet.
66
00:03:45,758 --> 00:03:48,135
Yes, well, I was up till all
hours of the night with Daphne,
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competing to see which of us
had the more pathetic love life.
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On the bright side, I won.
69
00:03:54,267 --> 00:03:56,351
Well, I know what your problems are.
70
00:03:56,435 --> 00:03:58,187
-What are Daphne's?
-Daphne?
71
00:03:58,271 --> 00:04:00,439
Oh, she's just having trouble finding men.
72
00:04:01,732 --> 00:04:02,566
-Oh.
-Say no more.
73
00:04:02,650 --> 00:04:04,860
No, Roz, Roz, no, please,
really, it's not necessary.
74
00:04:04,944 --> 00:04:07,905
You do not have to donate one
of your boyfriends to Daphne.
75
00:04:08,948 --> 00:04:10,157
Please, I'd be happy to.
76
00:04:10,241 --> 00:04:12,827
No, still, one hates to
break up a collection.
77
00:04:15,955 --> 00:04:18,832
There you go, triple
espresso, and my mocha latte…
78
00:04:18,916 --> 00:04:20,876
Do those chocolate
shavings look different to you?
79
00:04:20,960 --> 00:04:23,170
-No.
-Well, they do to me.
80
00:04:23,254 --> 00:04:25,965
I think they've switched to
an inferior domestic brand.
81
00:04:29,135 --> 00:04:30,303
Mm-hm, mm-hm, mm-hm.
82
00:04:31,220 --> 00:04:32,305
Waxy.
83
00:04:34,348 --> 00:04:37,017
Sven Botman. He's an aerobics instructor.
84
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I don't think so.
85
00:04:38,227 --> 00:04:41,104
Oh, oh, this one's perfect.
Gunther Dietrich.
86
00:04:41,188 --> 00:04:43,524
Oh, he's loads of fun,
and he's a runway model.
87
00:04:43,608 --> 00:04:44,859
A German narcissist?
88
00:04:44,943 --> 00:04:46,593
There's an appealing combination.
89
00:04:49,114 --> 00:04:51,950
-Okay, okay, okay, I'll keep looking.
-Looking for what?
90
00:04:52,034 --> 00:04:54,536
I'm helping Frasier find a man for Daphne.
91
00:04:59,541 --> 00:05:00,375
What?
92
00:05:01,501 --> 00:05:04,754
Here we go. He's a tennis
instructor, and his name is Brick.
93
00:05:04,838 --> 00:05:07,966
Dear God, Frasier. Sven? Gunther? Brick?
94
00:05:09,092 --> 00:05:11,386
Why not just lather
Daphne up with baby oil
95
00:05:11,470 --> 00:05:13,639
and hurl her over the
wall of a prison yard?
96
00:05:19,603 --> 00:05:21,771
Excuse me, but I've dated all these guys.
97
00:05:21,855 --> 00:05:24,105
Where do you think I
came up with the imagery?
98
00:05:26,318 --> 00:05:28,236
Listen, you little titmouse.
99
00:05:29,655 --> 00:05:31,614
Niles, you are completely out of line,
100
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and, Roz, he does have a point.
101
00:05:33,992 --> 00:05:36,661
You and Daphne are entirely
different kinds of women.
102
00:05:36,745 --> 00:05:41,040
While Daphne is very shy and
inexperienced, you are more, well,
103
00:05:41,124 --> 00:05:42,792
a lot more, well, you'd be hard-pressed
104
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-to find anyone who's more…
-Oh, I get it.
105
00:05:45,295 --> 00:05:47,923
Not one man I've ever dated is
good enough for Miss Daphne.
106
00:05:48,007 --> 00:05:49,508
Is that what you're trying to say?
107
00:05:49,592 --> 00:05:53,095
No, that is what I'm trying not to say.
You're not making it very easy.
108
00:05:53,179 --> 00:05:54,972
-Oh, I'm out of here.
-Oh, Roz, please, wait.
109
00:05:55,056 --> 00:05:57,642
No, I can't stay. The fleet is in.
110
00:06:02,855 --> 00:06:04,899
[SHRILL TONE PLAYING]
111
00:06:12,323 --> 00:06:15,576
And this concludes our test of
the Emergency Broadcast System.
112
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Had this been a real emergency, your
radio would be melting in your hands.
113
00:06:26,045 --> 00:06:28,131
We'll be right back after these messages.
114
00:06:29,966 --> 00:06:34,470
In the future, please keep your
disgusting half-eaten food off my console.
115
00:06:34,554 --> 00:06:35,930
In fact, just stay out of my sight.
116
00:06:36,014 --> 00:06:38,141
You're still mad at me. I can tell.
117
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Ooh, there's that keen sensitivity that
keeps you in such demand with the ladies.
118
00:06:42,645 --> 00:06:43,521
FRASIER: Oh…
119
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Look, Roz, I'm sorry if I insulted
you earlier, but the truth is,
120
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I feel very protective about Daphne.
121
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The kind of man I'm looking for has
to be good-looking, smart, successful…
122
00:06:56,243 --> 00:06:58,703
-Excuse me.
-FRASIER: Yes?
123
00:06:58,787 --> 00:07:02,165
-I'm Tom Duran, the new station manager.
-Oh, Tom, hi.
124
00:07:02,249 --> 00:07:03,458
It's a pleasure to meet you.
125
00:07:03,542 --> 00:07:06,211
I'm so sorry about missing the meeting.
I slept right through it.
126
00:07:06,295 --> 00:07:08,047
Oh, yeah, me too. And I was there.
127
00:07:08,922 --> 00:07:11,633
-Say, that's a beautiful tie.
-Oh, thank you.
128
00:07:11,717 --> 00:07:14,469
Yes, I got this in London at
one of those custom shops.
129
00:07:14,553 --> 00:07:16,096
It was just off of Sloane Square.
130
00:07:16,180 --> 00:07:17,389
I just came from London.
131
00:07:17,473 --> 00:07:19,557
I spent the last five years
there working for the BBC.
132
00:07:19,641 --> 00:07:22,019
Really? Yes, I love London.
133
00:07:22,728 --> 00:07:25,480
-The museums, the theater…
-Oh, yeah, I'm a big theater buff.
134
00:07:25,564 --> 00:07:27,023
Three shows a week.
135
00:07:27,107 --> 00:07:29,901
-I hated leaving.
-Well, I can imagine. Why did you?
136
00:07:29,985 --> 00:07:32,696
Well, I just kind of went
through a messy breakup.
137
00:07:32,780 --> 00:07:35,532
I thought I'd sleep better
with a continent between us.
138
00:07:36,366 --> 00:07:37,659
Yes, I know the feeling.
139
00:07:41,663 --> 00:07:45,125
So… I take it, then, you're unattached?
140
00:07:45,209 --> 00:07:47,127
Uh, yes, but I haven't given up hope.
141
00:07:47,836 --> 00:07:50,422
Well, you may have
come to the right place.
142
00:07:50,506 --> 00:07:52,549
-Really?
-Yes.
143
00:07:53,426 --> 00:07:56,095
-You say you're very fond of the English?
-TOM: Oh, yes, very much.
144
00:07:56,179 --> 00:07:58,180
You know, I think I've always
had a weakness for people
145
00:07:58,264 --> 00:08:00,057
who are just a little eccentric.
146
00:08:00,141 --> 00:08:01,892
-Really?
-ROZ: Fifteen seconds.
147
00:08:01,976 --> 00:08:03,519
-Oh.
-It was nice meeting you.
148
00:08:03,603 --> 00:08:04,770
Likewise, Tom.
149
00:08:04,854 --> 00:08:07,440
Oh, say, Tom, this may
sound like short notice,
150
00:08:07,524 --> 00:08:10,568
but if you're not busy Saturday, why
don't you come by my place for dinner?
151
00:08:10,652 --> 00:08:12,403
-Nothing fancy.
-Oh, thanks. I'd like that.
152
00:08:12,487 --> 00:08:13,321
FRASIER: Great.
153
00:08:15,907 --> 00:08:19,410
Hello, Seattle, we're back.
Roz, whom do we have up next?
154
00:08:19,494 --> 00:08:21,788
ROZ: We have James
from Tacoma on line one.
155
00:08:22,372 --> 00:08:24,415
FRASIER: Hello, James, I'm listening.
156
00:08:25,166 --> 00:08:27,126
-JAMES: I'm glad you're listening…
-Hey, Roz.
157
00:08:27,210 --> 00:08:28,169
Oh, hey, Tom.
158
00:08:28,837 --> 00:08:30,838
Boy, it's the same every job I take.
159
00:08:30,922 --> 00:08:32,965
Word spreads like wildfire.
160
00:08:33,049 --> 00:08:34,050
Oh, what's that?
161
00:08:34,134 --> 00:08:37,094
Oh, you know, you tell one
or two people you're gay,
162
00:08:37,178 --> 00:08:40,140
and before you can blink,
it's all over the station.
163
00:08:41,099 --> 00:08:43,809
Well, they don't call it
"broadcasting" for nothing.
164
00:08:43,893 --> 00:08:45,293
You're not paying attention.
165
00:08:46,312 --> 00:08:49,440
-He seems like a nice guy.
-Oh, he's okay.
166
00:08:49,524 --> 00:08:52,777
Well, I hope he's more than okay.
He just asked me out on a date.
167
00:08:58,784 --> 00:09:00,786
Frasier just asked you out on a date?
168
00:09:00,870 --> 00:09:02,537
He asked me to his place for dinner.
169
00:09:02,621 --> 00:09:05,082
So I wanted to ask you, is
there any particular wine he likes?
170
00:09:05,166 --> 00:09:07,584
There's something you
need to know about Frasier.
171
00:09:07,668 --> 00:09:08,669
What?
172
00:09:10,546 --> 00:09:13,716
-He's nuts about Chardonnay.
-Thanks.
173
00:09:23,309 --> 00:09:24,768
DAPHNE: Does he ask permission first?
174
00:09:24,852 --> 00:09:28,271
Oh, no, he just barges in and says
he set me up with God knows who,
175
00:09:28,355 --> 00:09:31,455
and I'm supposed to turn
cartwheels like I'm bloody Cinderella.
176
00:09:31,859 --> 00:09:34,027
Daphne, will you please relax?
177
00:09:34,111 --> 00:09:36,154
Look, I told you, this is not a setup.
178
00:09:36,238 --> 00:09:39,199
-Tom doesn't even know you'll be here.
-Oh, an ambush, then.
179
00:09:39,283 --> 00:09:40,492
Much nicer.
180
00:09:41,744 --> 00:09:44,746
Me girlfriends in Manchester
used to set me up all the time.
181
00:09:44,830 --> 00:09:48,291
And it was always some gangly
bounder with a boardinghouse reach.
182
00:09:48,375 --> 00:09:52,025
And he wasn't going for the Colman's
hot mustard, if you know what I mean.
183
00:09:52,129 --> 00:09:56,174
Keep in mind that Tom is just a coworker
coming by for a pleasant little dinner.
184
00:09:56,258 --> 00:09:57,759
If some sparks should ignite, fine.
185
00:09:57,843 --> 00:10:00,221
But there is no pressure,
absolutely no pressure.
186
00:10:00,305 --> 00:10:01,705
Is that what you're wearing?
187
00:10:03,433 --> 00:10:05,059
-What's wrong with it?
-[DOORBELL RINGS]
188
00:10:05,143 --> 00:10:07,395
FRASIER: Don't you have
something with a little more oomph?
189
00:10:07,479 --> 00:10:10,774
I mean, what about that…
Oh, that strapless number you have?
190
00:10:13,235 --> 00:10:16,947
Do you have any idea how
uncomfortable a strapless bra is?
191
00:10:17,614 --> 00:10:20,664
Well, thanks to my fraternity
days, as a matter of fact, I do.
192
00:10:25,622 --> 00:10:27,623
-Tom, come on in.
-Hi, Frasier.
193
00:10:27,707 --> 00:10:29,292
-Good to see you.
-Oh, I don't know.
194
00:10:29,376 --> 00:10:33,046
-Something told me you'd like Chardonnay.
-Oh, my, that's my favorite.
195
00:10:34,756 --> 00:10:37,925
-So, what do you think of the place?
-That's a hell of a view.
196
00:10:38,009 --> 00:10:39,803
It's even better from the bedroom.
197
00:10:45,725 --> 00:10:47,575
Why don't we just start with a drink?
198
00:10:48,728 --> 00:10:50,313
Oh.
199
00:10:50,939 --> 00:10:52,690
TOM: Oh, four places. Who's joining us?
200
00:10:52,774 --> 00:10:54,483
Oh, well, just my, uh, little household.
201
00:10:54,567 --> 00:10:58,613
My father and his physical
therapist, charming Daphne.
202
00:10:59,197 --> 00:11:00,573
You live with your dad?
203
00:11:00,657 --> 00:11:01,657
Mm.
204
00:11:01,741 --> 00:11:03,785
Ugh. I can't even imagine that.
205
00:11:03,869 --> 00:11:05,871
I think it's great that
you get along so well,
206
00:11:05,955 --> 00:11:09,666
but doesn't having him here
kind of put a crimp in your love life?
207
00:11:09,750 --> 00:11:12,085
Not at all. No, well, except
when I bring my dates home,
208
00:11:12,169 --> 00:11:13,629
he tries to steal them.
209
00:11:20,636 --> 00:11:22,138
He's quite the old rascal.
210
00:11:24,390 --> 00:11:25,307
DAPHNE: Good evening.
211
00:11:25,391 --> 00:11:28,561
Oh, well, look who we have here. Hmm.
212
00:11:29,687 --> 00:11:32,356
Tom, I'd like you to meet Daphne.
213
00:11:32,440 --> 00:11:34,524
Daphne, this is Tom Duran.
214
00:11:34,608 --> 00:11:36,693
-Pleasure to meet you.
-Likewise.
215
00:11:36,777 --> 00:11:38,612
Dr. Crane, you didn't take his coat.
216
00:11:38,696 --> 00:11:39,947
-Oh, sorry.
-May I?
217
00:11:41,824 --> 00:11:44,827
[BOTH MOUTHING]
218
00:11:48,164 --> 00:11:50,457
Oh, this is strange.
219
00:11:50,541 --> 00:11:52,668
I'm picking up a vibration from your coat.
220
00:11:52,752 --> 00:11:53,669
TOM: Excuse me?
221
00:11:53,753 --> 00:11:56,672
Yes, well, Daphne feels that
she possesses psychic powers.
222
00:11:56,756 --> 00:11:58,882
You know those English eccentrics.
223
00:11:58,966 --> 00:12:02,761
Oh, you've just been through a
very painful breakup, haven't you?
224
00:12:02,845 --> 00:12:03,971
Yes!
225
00:12:04,055 --> 00:12:05,807
-Wait a minute, you told her that.
-No.
226
00:12:05,891 --> 00:12:09,477
There was a bitter dispute about
ownership of opera recordings.
227
00:12:09,561 --> 00:12:10,562
Whoa.
228
00:12:13,065 --> 00:12:15,858
Now, if you'll excuse
me, I'll nip into the kitchen.
229
00:12:15,942 --> 00:12:17,778
-I have a bird to baste.
-Mm-hm.
230
00:12:21,198 --> 00:12:23,324
-Quite something, isn't she?
-Oh, she's great.
231
00:12:23,408 --> 00:12:25,243
I love hearing that accent again.
232
00:12:25,327 --> 00:12:28,830
Hey, Frasier, I don't have to
put a tie on for this joker, do I?
233
00:12:32,709 --> 00:12:35,670
Tom, this is my father, Martin Crane.
234
00:12:35,754 --> 00:12:37,005
Tom Duran. Nice to meet you.
235
00:12:37,089 --> 00:12:39,048
Oh, yeah, sorry about that joker business.
236
00:12:39,132 --> 00:12:41,259
I call everybody "joker" or "jerk."
237
00:12:42,386 --> 00:12:44,513
"Pinhead." "Bozo."
238
00:12:45,555 --> 00:12:48,392
Amazingly, he's free
for dinner on short notice.
239
00:12:49,101 --> 00:12:51,603
Why don't I just open
some of this wonderful wine?
240
00:12:53,522 --> 00:12:56,024
-Well?
-Oh, he's a looker.
241
00:12:56,108 --> 00:12:58,568
-Mm-hm.
-I'm glad you made me put on me lucky bra.
242
00:12:58,652 --> 00:13:01,154
He's worth every wire
digging into me rib cage.
243
00:13:02,239 --> 00:13:04,282
Yes, you made quite
an impression on him too.
244
00:13:04,366 --> 00:13:05,325
He thinks you're great.
245
00:13:05,409 --> 00:13:06,617
Oh, go on.
246
00:13:06,701 --> 00:13:09,872
Oh, ho, ho, God, listen
to me, getting carried away
247
00:13:09,956 --> 00:13:11,915
like a schoolgirl when I just met the man.
248
00:13:11,999 --> 00:13:14,626
No, I'm not raising me hopes tonight.
249
00:13:14,710 --> 00:13:16,587
Though I'm glad I raised me bosom.
250
00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:19,757
Let me tell you, you're
gonna love Seattle.
251
00:13:19,841 --> 00:13:21,300
It's a real people place.
252
00:13:21,384 --> 00:13:23,802
-Good food, great bars.
-I've heard that.
253
00:13:23,886 --> 00:13:24,845
Any you recommend?
254
00:13:24,929 --> 00:13:26,764
Yeah, I usually hang out
at a place called Duke's.
255
00:13:26,848 --> 00:13:28,932
Great crowd. A lot of young cops.
256
00:13:29,016 --> 00:13:30,143
Mm.
257
00:13:35,314 --> 00:13:36,231
Say, you like football?
258
00:13:36,315 --> 00:13:38,692
Yeah, I really missed it
when I was living in London.
259
00:13:38,776 --> 00:13:41,445
Well, maybe we could take
in a Seahawk game sometime.
260
00:13:41,529 --> 00:13:43,572
Frasier hates it, so it'd just be us.
261
00:13:43,656 --> 00:13:45,657
Hey, Frasier warned me about you.
262
00:13:45,741 --> 00:13:46,941
MARTIN: [CHUCKLING] Oh…
263
00:13:48,119 --> 00:13:51,622
Yeah, I guess I yell
at the players too loud.
264
00:13:51,706 --> 00:13:53,541
Here we are, Tom.
265
00:13:55,126 --> 00:13:58,379
Dad, I took the liberty of selecting
an amusing little vintage for you too.
266
00:13:58,463 --> 00:14:01,213
Sorry I didn't bring the
pull tab so you could sniff it.
267
00:14:02,550 --> 00:14:04,635
-Merci beaucoops.
-[DOORBELL RINGS]
268
00:14:04,719 --> 00:14:05,803
Oh, excuse me.
269
00:14:11,852 --> 00:14:13,144
Oh, Niles.
270
00:14:13,228 --> 00:14:14,771
Hello, Frasier. Oh, thank you.
271
00:14:16,899 --> 00:14:19,192
-Just stopped by to return your book.
-FRASIER: Well, thank you.
272
00:14:19,276 --> 00:14:21,028
-Don't let me keep you.
-Oh.
273
00:14:22,070 --> 00:14:23,530
Am I interrupting something?
274
00:14:24,031 --> 00:14:26,533
Niles, as a matter of fact, I'm
introducing a man to Daphne.
275
00:14:26,617 --> 00:14:29,536
-Oh, guess you don't want me around, then.
-Thank you.
276
00:14:30,162 --> 00:14:31,079
How do you do?
277
00:14:33,707 --> 00:14:35,291
I'm Dr. Niles Crane.
278
00:14:35,375 --> 00:14:37,419
-Hi, I'm Tom Duran.
-DAPHNE: The bird's all done.
279
00:14:37,503 --> 00:14:41,297
All I need is a pair of big strong
arms to haul it out of the oven.
280
00:14:41,381 --> 00:14:43,717
Well, I certainly don't
need to be asked twice.
281
00:14:52,184 --> 00:14:55,478
So halfway through the interview,
her stomach starts rumbling.
282
00:14:55,562 --> 00:14:57,439
And her body mike's picking it up,
283
00:14:58,148 --> 00:15:00,233
but I have to ignore it,
because what am I gonna say?
284
00:15:00,317 --> 00:15:02,903
Excuse me, would Her
Majesty care for a Tums?
285
00:15:05,697 --> 00:15:09,200
Oh, I could listen to
your stories all night.
286
00:15:09,284 --> 00:15:10,869
They're so funny.
287
00:15:10,953 --> 00:15:12,871
And all involving bodily functions.
288
00:15:14,540 --> 00:15:15,792
[FRASIER CLEARS THROAT]
289
00:15:18,962 --> 00:15:21,589
Tom, I could use a
little hand in the kitchen.
290
00:15:21,673 --> 00:15:23,382
No, no, sit, Daphne.
291
00:15:23,466 --> 00:15:26,302
After all that cooking, you
must be absolutely strapless.
292
00:15:36,396 --> 00:15:38,856
Uh, Niles, can I speak
with you for a moment?
293
00:15:38,940 --> 00:15:39,857
Yes.
294
00:15:40,858 --> 00:15:43,402
I was wondering, did I do
anything that offended you?
295
00:15:43,486 --> 00:15:44,362
No.
296
00:15:45,947 --> 00:15:48,449
Oh. Must be all in my head.
297
00:15:48,533 --> 00:15:51,327
But I sensed that you had a
problem with me dating Frasier.
298
00:15:51,411 --> 00:15:52,704
Well, if you must know…
299
00:16:02,880 --> 00:16:04,591
I'm sorry, what was the question?
300
00:16:07,093 --> 00:16:09,804
Do you have some problem
with me dating your brother?
301
00:16:13,558 --> 00:16:14,517
No.
302
00:16:17,604 --> 00:16:19,940
Now, Niles, I didn't ask
Tom to dinner so he'd end up
303
00:16:20,024 --> 00:16:21,775
talking to you all night in the kitchen.
304
00:16:21,859 --> 00:16:24,559
There are others who would
like to have a crack at him.
305
00:16:38,417 --> 00:16:40,418
Hey, that Tom's a great guy, huh?
306
00:16:40,502 --> 00:16:42,837
You think maybe him and Daphne, uh…
307
00:16:42,921 --> 00:16:44,298
[CHORTLES]
308
00:16:46,925 --> 00:16:50,512
You know, I can't remember the last
time I had such a wonderful evening.
309
00:16:50,596 --> 00:16:52,305
Oh, no, we should be thanking you.
310
00:16:52,389 --> 00:16:54,641
I can't remember when
I've laughed so hard.
311
00:16:54,725 --> 00:16:56,727
[MARTIN GUFFAWING]
312
00:17:02,232 --> 00:17:03,984
You've still got Mr. Crane going.
313
00:17:05,611 --> 00:17:08,363
Daphne, I think a little after-dinner
music might be appropriate.
314
00:17:08,447 --> 00:17:09,448
Good idea.
315
00:17:13,369 --> 00:17:15,454
She's quite a woman, isn't she?
316
00:17:16,038 --> 00:17:18,290
Yes, she's… She's really something.
317
00:17:18,832 --> 00:17:21,002
-Uh, Frasier, I was wondering…
-Yes?
318
00:17:21,836 --> 00:17:25,924
Do you think before the evening's over
we could get a little one-on-one time?
319
00:17:27,342 --> 00:17:29,636
Oh, I think I can arrange that.
320
00:17:35,141 --> 00:17:36,183
-Daphne!
-What?
321
00:17:36,267 --> 00:17:38,144
-He says he wants to be alone with you.
-DAPHNE: No!
322
00:17:38,228 --> 00:17:39,812
-Yes!
-This really is me lucky bra.
323
00:17:39,896 --> 00:17:41,814
Keep the wine flowing.
I'll go fix me lipstick.
324
00:17:41,898 --> 00:17:42,732
Okay.
325
00:17:43,566 --> 00:17:46,361
Yeah, I guess I'd better
be hitting the old sack.
326
00:17:48,488 --> 00:17:51,074
I don't wanna stand in
the way of young romance.
327
00:17:52,325 --> 00:17:53,200
Thanks, Dad.
328
00:17:53,284 --> 00:17:55,411
-MARTIN: Good night, Tom.
-Good night, Martin.
329
00:17:55,495 --> 00:17:57,747
[ELEGANT JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING ON STEREO]
330
00:17:57,831 --> 00:18:00,291
I think it's time that you
be running along too.
331
00:18:00,375 --> 00:18:02,501
Yes, I must be on my way.
And I must apologize.
332
00:18:02,585 --> 00:18:03,836
I was wrong about Tom.
333
00:18:03,920 --> 00:18:06,881
If I had to choose a man for
Daphne, he's the one I'd pick.
334
00:18:07,424 --> 00:18:09,759
-Good night, Tom. Nice to meet you.
-Good night.
335
00:18:09,843 --> 00:18:13,193
-FRASIER: I'll show you out.
-Mm-hmm. Frasier, a word in your ear?
336
00:18:13,805 --> 00:18:15,724
Oh. Uh, excuse me.
337
00:18:17,726 --> 00:18:21,563
There's something I have to tell you.
Dad wanted to, but I won the coin toss.
338
00:18:27,027 --> 00:18:27,861
Yes? What is it?
339
00:18:27,945 --> 00:18:29,988
Well, I had a little chat
with Tom in the kitchen,
340
00:18:30,072 --> 00:18:33,033
and he told me he's interested in
pursuing a romantic relationship,
341
00:18:33,117 --> 00:18:35,869
but the object of his
affections is not Daphne.
342
00:18:35,953 --> 00:18:37,288
Damn that Roz!
343
00:18:38,372 --> 00:18:40,499
No, no. It's you.
344
00:18:44,837 --> 00:18:45,962
Me?
345
00:18:46,046 --> 00:18:48,048
Well, that's impossible. Tom's not gay.
346
00:18:48,132 --> 00:18:50,232
Well, he seems to be
under that impression.
347
00:18:53,971 --> 00:18:54,972
Well…
348
00:18:57,141 --> 00:18:59,309
What could have made him
think that I was interested in him?
349
00:18:59,393 --> 00:19:01,228
All I did was ask him if he was attached,
350
00:19:01,312 --> 00:19:04,962
and then we talked about the theater
and men's fashions and… Oh, my God.
351
00:19:08,068 --> 00:19:11,618
-Niles, do you realize what this means?
-Yes, you're dating your boss.
352
00:19:16,994 --> 00:19:20,664
You, of all people, should know
the pitfalls of an office relationship.
353
00:19:22,082 --> 00:19:25,085
Yes, but he didn't say anything.
He never mentioned the fact that…
354
00:19:25,169 --> 00:19:28,006
I'll call you tomorrow, but
not too early, of course.
355
00:19:44,898 --> 00:19:46,233
So…
356
00:19:47,526 --> 00:19:48,443
So…
357
00:19:50,403 --> 00:19:52,072
God, I hate this song.
358
00:19:53,114 --> 00:19:56,993
You know, I've broken my rule for you.
I usually don't date guys I work with.
359
00:19:57,077 --> 00:19:58,369
[MUSIC STOPS]
360
00:19:58,453 --> 00:20:01,248
Yes, well, I've sort of
relaxed my rule for you too.
361
00:20:12,092 --> 00:20:14,010
You're cute when you're nervous.
362
00:20:18,849 --> 00:20:21,142
Yes, well, I must be
downright adorable now.
363
00:20:23,728 --> 00:20:24,980
Listen, Tom, uh…
364
00:20:27,107 --> 00:20:30,736
I'm sorry, but we seem to have
gotten our lines crossed here. Uh…
365
00:20:31,946 --> 00:20:35,157
The truth is I'm entirely straight.
366
00:20:36,117 --> 00:20:38,827
Hey, if you're not
interested, just say so.
367
00:20:38,911 --> 00:20:40,830
No, no, it's true. I really am.
368
00:20:41,372 --> 00:20:44,082
I just invited you to dinner
because you seemed so charming
369
00:20:44,166 --> 00:20:46,126
and you were so fond of the British,
370
00:20:46,210 --> 00:20:49,630
I thought you might be
the perfect man for Daphne.
371
00:20:49,714 --> 00:20:51,632
Oh, I can't believe this.
372
00:20:51,716 --> 00:20:53,801
You really had no idea that I'm gay?
373
00:21:05,479 --> 00:21:09,400
Don't take this wrong, but it never even
occurred to me that you might be gay.
374
00:21:10,067 --> 00:21:13,117
Well, it never even occurred
to me that you might be straight.
375
00:21:15,114 --> 00:21:16,032
Thank you.
376
00:21:18,701 --> 00:21:20,953
Jeez, Tom, you know, I feel just awful.
377
00:21:21,495 --> 00:21:23,580
It seems I've just been
leading you on all night.
378
00:21:23,664 --> 00:21:25,290
Oh, it's okay.
379
00:21:25,374 --> 00:21:26,375
Honest mistake.
380
00:21:26,459 --> 00:21:28,836
Yes, but I've been pouring you
drinks, building up your hopes,
381
00:21:28,920 --> 00:21:30,879
making you think you
might have found a man
382
00:21:30,963 --> 00:21:32,798
sophisticated and sensitive
enough to help you…
383
00:21:32,882 --> 00:21:35,218
Frasier, I'll learn to love again.
384
00:21:35,302 --> 00:21:37,220
Ah. Yes, of course.
385
00:21:37,304 --> 00:21:39,597
Uh, you'll apologize to Daphne?
386
00:21:39,681 --> 00:21:41,058
For the rest of my days.
387
00:21:42,768 --> 00:21:44,937
Does this mean your dad's not gay either?
388
00:21:48,106 --> 00:21:49,733
No, no, Dad's not gay.
389
00:21:51,610 --> 00:21:53,070
But Niles… Come on.
390
00:21:59,618 --> 00:22:01,745
-No, I'm afraid not.
-Huh.
391
00:22:02,663 --> 00:22:05,915
So wait a minute, this Maris guy
he kept mentioning is a woman?
392
00:22:05,999 --> 00:22:09,127
Well… the jury's still out on that one.
393
00:22:15,801 --> 00:22:16,885
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
394
00:22:16,969 --> 00:22:19,668
♪ Hey, baby, I hear the blues a-callin' ♪
395
00:22:19,752 --> 00:22:22,099
♪ Tossed salads and scrambled eggs ♪
396
00:22:22,683 --> 00:22:23,892
Oh, my.
397
00:22:23,976 --> 00:22:26,395
♪ And maybe I seem a bit confused ♪
398
00:22:26,479 --> 00:22:28,897
♪ Well, maybe, but I got you pegged ♪
399
00:22:28,981 --> 00:22:31,149
Ha, ha, ha, ha!
400
00:22:31,233 --> 00:22:32,650
♪ But I don't know what to do ♪
401
00:22:32,734 --> 00:22:36,239
♪ With those tossed salads
and scrambled eggs ♪
402
00:22:37,115 --> 00:22:39,742
♪ They're callin' again ♪
403
00:22:39,826 --> 00:22:42,662
Frasier has left the building.