1 00:00:05,706 --> 00:00:07,906 [♪♪♪] 2 00:00:07,908 --> 00:00:10,575 NARRATOR: Newsreel of the Stars. 3 00:00:10,577 --> 00:00:14,046 Dateline: Hollywood, 1930. The Warner Bros. Studio. 4 00:00:14,048 --> 00:00:16,448 Here at the studio's new animation department, 5 00:00:16,450 --> 00:00:19,784 the artists toil endlessly to come up with cartoon stars, 6 00:00:19,786 --> 00:00:22,121 ultimately creating three new characters, 7 00:00:22,123 --> 00:00:25,124 the Warner brothers and their sister, Dot. 8 00:00:25,126 --> 00:00:27,792 WARNERS: Hello, Nurse! 9 00:00:27,794 --> 00:00:31,563 Unfortunately, the Warner kids were totally out of control. 10 00:00:31,565 --> 00:00:34,299 [IN UNISON] Boingy, boingy, boingy, boingy. 11 00:00:34,301 --> 00:00:37,436 The trio ran amok throughout the studio, 12 00:00:38,605 --> 00:00:40,506 until their capture. 13 00:00:40,508 --> 00:00:44,009 The Warners' films, which made absolutely no sense, 14 00:00:44,011 --> 00:00:45,844 were locked away in the studio vault, 15 00:00:45,846 --> 00:00:47,946 never to be released. 16 00:00:47,948 --> 00:00:50,149 As for the Warners themselves, 17 00:00:50,151 --> 00:00:52,418 they were locked away in the studio water tower, 18 00:00:52,420 --> 00:00:55,154 also never to be released. 19 00:00:55,156 --> 00:00:57,923 Publicly, the studio has disavowed any knowledge 20 00:00:57,925 --> 00:01:00,892 of the Warners' existence to this very day 21 00:01:00,894 --> 00:01:02,861 when the Warners escaped. 22 00:01:02,863 --> 00:01:04,363 [♪♪♪] 23 00:01:04,365 --> 00:01:08,133 ALL: ♪ It's time for Animaniacs ♪ 24 00:01:08,135 --> 00:01:10,769 ♪ And we're zany to the max ♪ 25 00:01:10,771 --> 00:01:12,538 ♪ So just sit back and relax ♪ 26 00:01:12,540 --> 00:01:14,206 ♪ You'll laugh Till you collapse ♪ 27 00:01:14,208 --> 00:01:16,608 ♪ We're Animaniacs ♪ 28 00:01:16,610 --> 00:01:18,377 BOTH: ♪ Come join The Warner brothers ♪ 29 00:01:18,379 --> 00:01:20,011 ♪ And the Warner sister, Dot ♪ 30 00:01:20,013 --> 00:01:23,014 ALL: ♪ Just for fun we run around The Warner movie lot ♪ 31 00:01:23,016 --> 00:01:25,684 ♪ They lock us in the tower Whenever we get caught ♪ 32 00:01:25,686 --> 00:01:27,386 ♪ But we break loose And then vamoose ♪ 33 00:01:27,388 --> 00:01:28,587 ♪ And now you know the plot ♪ 34 00:01:28,589 --> 00:01:31,123 ♪ We're Animaniacs ♪ 35 00:01:31,125 --> 00:01:34,126 ♪ Dot is cute and Yakko yaks ♪ 36 00:01:34,128 --> 00:01:35,461 ♪ Wakko packs away the snacks ♪ 37 00:01:35,463 --> 00:01:37,129 ♪ While Bill Clinton Plays the sax ♪ 38 00:01:37,131 --> 00:01:39,198 ♪ We're Animaniacs ♪ 39 00:01:40,334 --> 00:01:41,533 ♪ Meet Pinky and the Brain ♪ 40 00:01:41,535 --> 00:01:43,034 ♪ Who want to rule The universe ♪ 41 00:01:43,036 --> 00:01:44,403 ♪ Goodfeathers flock together ♪ 42 00:01:44,405 --> 00:01:45,937 ♪ Slappy whacks 'em With her purse ♪ 43 00:01:45,939 --> 00:01:47,272 ♪ Buttons chases Mindy ♪ 44 00:01:47,274 --> 00:01:48,807 ♪ While Rita sings a verse ♪ 45 00:01:48,809 --> 00:01:50,542 ♪ The writers flipped We have no script ♪ 46 00:01:50,544 --> 00:01:51,710 ♪ Why bother to rehearse? ♪ 47 00:01:51,712 --> 00:01:54,480 ♪ We're Animaniacs ♪ 48 00:01:54,482 --> 00:01:57,316 ♪ We have pay-or-play Contracts ♪ 49 00:01:57,318 --> 00:01:58,717 ♪ We're zany to the max ♪ 50 00:01:58,719 --> 00:02:00,385 ♪ There's bologna In our slacks ♪ 51 00:02:00,387 --> 00:02:01,953 ♪ We're Animan-y ♪ 52 00:02:01,955 --> 00:02:03,388 ♪ Totally insane-y ♪ 53 00:02:03,390 --> 00:02:04,856 ♪ Here's the show's name-y ♪ 54 00:02:04,858 --> 00:02:07,092 ♪ Animaniacs ♪ 55 00:02:07,094 --> 00:02:08,560 ♪ Those are the facts ♪ 56 00:02:11,564 --> 00:02:13,565 [♪♪♪] 57 00:02:17,304 --> 00:02:19,938 Sure, you may turn away from me now, 58 00:02:19,940 --> 00:02:23,908 but as long as I keep drinking my buttermilk, 59 00:02:23,910 --> 00:02:25,310 I can count on growing up 60 00:02:25,312 --> 00:02:27,312 with a serious lactose intolerance. 61 00:02:27,314 --> 00:02:28,313 [BURPS] 62 00:02:28,315 --> 00:02:29,748 And even though I won't be able 63 00:02:29,750 --> 00:02:31,082 to digest the stuff, 64 00:02:31,084 --> 00:02:33,719 I'm gonna keep drinkin' my buttermilk. 65 00:02:34,921 --> 00:02:37,155 'Cause it'll always remind me of you 66 00:02:37,157 --> 00:02:40,859 and the way you snubbed me when I was young and innocent. 67 00:02:40,861 --> 00:02:43,962 In fact, in later years, I'll become downright obsessed 68 00:02:43,964 --> 00:02:45,196 with that memory. 69 00:02:45,198 --> 00:02:48,166 Yeah, I'll spend years trackin' you down. 70 00:02:48,168 --> 00:02:49,468 And when I find ya, 71 00:02:49,470 --> 00:02:51,770 I'll give you exactly what you deserve, 72 00:02:51,772 --> 00:02:55,073 you no-good, heartless, half-witted yutz! 73 00:02:59,813 --> 00:03:01,546 [LAUGHING] 74 00:03:01,548 --> 00:03:04,283 ANNOUNCER: Buttermilk, it makes a body bitter. 75 00:03:04,285 --> 00:03:06,652 Ah, what do you know? 76 00:03:06,654 --> 00:03:08,654 [♪♪♪] 77 00:03:15,929 --> 00:03:18,997 And now, some sad news. 78 00:03:18,999 --> 00:03:20,298 And now, some... 79 00:03:20,300 --> 00:03:21,299 [SNIFFLES] 80 00:03:21,301 --> 00:03:22,934 ...sad news. 81 00:03:24,070 --> 00:03:26,304 Two minutes to airtime, Mr. Anchorman. 82 00:03:26,306 --> 00:03:28,973 Quick, put some sincerity lines around my eyes. 83 00:03:28,975 --> 00:03:30,575 Where is that makeup man? 84 00:03:30,577 --> 00:03:31,610 [PANTING] 85 00:03:31,612 --> 00:03:33,612 Sorry I'm late, Mr. Anchorman. 86 00:03:33,614 --> 00:03:36,848 And now for some sad news. 87 00:03:36,850 --> 00:03:39,184 You're fired! 88 00:03:41,455 --> 00:03:43,821 All I ask for is a bit of support. 89 00:03:43,823 --> 00:03:45,723 And what do I get? Nothing! 90 00:03:47,093 --> 00:03:48,092 Do you have any idea 91 00:03:48,094 --> 00:03:50,662 how truly useless you people are? 92 00:03:50,664 --> 00:03:54,499 I am surrounded by untalented incompetents! 93 00:03:54,501 --> 00:03:57,035 Why are you all standing around staring at me? 94 00:03:57,037 --> 00:03:59,371 Do you have any idea what time it is? 95 00:03:59,373 --> 00:04:00,505 YAKKO: Lunchtime. 96 00:04:00,507 --> 00:04:01,939 Lunchtime? 97 00:04:03,510 --> 00:04:06,211 ♪ We're from Sam 'N' Ella's Coffee Shop ♪ 98 00:04:06,213 --> 00:04:08,680 ♪ Eat our food And you're bound to drop ♪ 99 00:04:08,682 --> 00:04:11,650 ♪ Then the only thing That's left to do ♪ 100 00:04:11,652 --> 00:04:14,118 ♪ Head to the potty And spew, spew, spew ♪ 101 00:04:14,120 --> 00:04:16,321 ♪ Sam 'N' Ella's ♪ 102 00:04:16,323 --> 00:04:18,290 We're Beatrice. 103 00:04:19,626 --> 00:04:21,493 I placed this order hours ago. 104 00:04:21,495 --> 00:04:23,061 Are you out of your minds? 105 00:04:23,063 --> 00:04:24,462 No, but we're out of our pickles. 106 00:04:24,464 --> 00:04:26,030 You'll have to take coleslaw. 107 00:04:26,032 --> 00:04:28,300 Who has the tongue on a bun? 108 00:04:31,004 --> 00:04:32,770 All right, who's the ham on rye? 109 00:04:32,772 --> 00:04:33,871 That's me. 110 00:04:33,873 --> 00:04:36,474 Just remember you said that, we didn't. 111 00:04:39,446 --> 00:04:41,979 I'm famished. 112 00:04:41,981 --> 00:04:44,482 How dare you take a bite out of my sandwich? 113 00:04:44,484 --> 00:04:46,551 Want it back? 114 00:04:46,553 --> 00:04:48,220 Eww! 115 00:04:49,889 --> 00:04:51,189 That'll be $6, 116 00:04:51,191 --> 00:04:53,958 and remember it's customary to tip 15 percent. 117 00:04:53,960 --> 00:04:57,229 You expect me to pay for this? I didn't even get a sandwich. 118 00:04:57,231 --> 00:04:59,297 Oh, I guess you're the turkey on a roll. 119 00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:00,332 [GOBBLING] 120 00:05:02,369 --> 00:05:04,436 Get out, you horrible little crustaceans. 121 00:05:04,438 --> 00:05:06,170 Get out, get out, get out! 122 00:05:06,172 --> 00:05:07,905 ALL: Whoa! 123 00:05:13,012 --> 00:05:14,812 Why, of all the nerve. 124 00:05:14,814 --> 00:05:15,913 I'll say. 125 00:05:15,915 --> 00:05:17,749 We never even got our tip. 126 00:05:21,455 --> 00:05:23,588 DIRECTOR: Five, four, three. 127 00:05:23,590 --> 00:05:25,257 We're on the air. 128 00:05:25,259 --> 00:05:29,060 ANNOUNCER: And now Newstime Live with your cohosts 129 00:05:29,062 --> 00:05:30,729 Dan Anchorman in New York 130 00:05:30,731 --> 00:05:33,498 and in Washington, Doo-Anne Sewer. 131 00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:35,667 Hi, I have a new haircut. 132 00:05:35,669 --> 00:05:36,834 [CHUCKLES] 133 00:05:36,836 --> 00:05:38,536 Lovely, Doo-Anne. 134 00:05:38,538 --> 00:05:40,272 Tonight on Newstime Live 135 00:05:40,274 --> 00:05:41,973 I'll show you the new American car 136 00:05:41,975 --> 00:05:45,076 that costs under $300 and runs on water, 137 00:05:45,078 --> 00:05:48,112 and how to make a million dollars without thinking. 138 00:05:48,114 --> 00:05:49,748 [SCREAMS] 139 00:05:49,750 --> 00:05:54,018 Thrilling, Doo-Anne, but first, my top story. 140 00:05:54,020 --> 00:05:56,154 Protesters have blockaded the entrance 141 00:05:56,156 --> 00:05:58,189 to the Newstime Live studios-- 142 00:05:58,191 --> 00:05:59,591 Hey, that's us! 143 00:05:59,593 --> 00:06:01,426 ALL: Hey, hey, ho, ho! 144 00:06:01,428 --> 00:06:03,495 Cheapskate anchor's got to go! 145 00:06:03,497 --> 00:06:07,732 Hey, hey, ho, ho! Cheapskate anchor's got to go! 146 00:06:07,734 --> 00:06:09,801 This is Wolf Spritzer reporting. 147 00:06:09,803 --> 00:06:12,003 It appears that Dan Anchorman didn't give 148 00:06:12,005 --> 00:06:14,572 these sandwich-delivery people a tip. 149 00:06:14,574 --> 00:06:16,007 We protest! 150 00:06:16,009 --> 00:06:18,943 We protest that Dan Anchorman wouldn't take coleslaw 151 00:06:18,945 --> 00:06:20,478 instead of pickles. 152 00:06:20,480 --> 00:06:22,714 Dan Anchorman discriminates against garnishes. 153 00:06:22,716 --> 00:06:25,082 We protest that he's a picky pickle picker. 154 00:06:25,084 --> 00:06:27,419 Say that three times fast. 155 00:06:27,421 --> 00:06:29,187 Picky pickle plicky-- 156 00:06:29,189 --> 00:06:32,890 Uh, plick-- Plicky puckle picker ple-- Plu-- 157 00:06:32,892 --> 00:06:35,493 You'll never make it on CNN. 158 00:06:35,495 --> 00:06:36,795 This is absurd. 159 00:06:36,797 --> 00:06:38,930 I will not have this broadcast interrupted 160 00:06:38,932 --> 00:06:40,432 by a bunch of little kids! 161 00:06:40,434 --> 00:06:42,834 We protest you calling us little kids! 162 00:06:42,836 --> 00:06:45,503 We prefer to be called vertically impaired pre-adults. 163 00:06:45,505 --> 00:06:47,138 I hate you! I hate you! 164 00:06:47,140 --> 00:06:48,740 I hate you! 165 00:06:50,210 --> 00:06:51,376 [CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY] 166 00:06:51,378 --> 00:06:53,611 We'll be right back after this commercial. 167 00:06:53,613 --> 00:06:55,112 DOT: We interrupt Newstime Live 168 00:06:55,114 --> 00:06:57,114 to bring you this special report. 169 00:06:57,116 --> 00:06:59,451 Our topic: Why people don't tip. 170 00:06:59,453 --> 00:07:02,620 For the answer, we turn to William F. Yakkly. 171 00:07:02,622 --> 00:07:05,557 And I think, uh, the reason, uh, people do not affix 172 00:07:05,559 --> 00:07:07,359 a compensation for service-- 173 00:07:07,361 --> 00:07:09,126 In layman's terms, a tip. 174 00:07:09,128 --> 00:07:12,964 --is that they are, in fact, extremely cheap. 175 00:07:12,966 --> 00:07:15,533 Would you say TV newsmen are extremely cheap? 176 00:07:15,535 --> 00:07:19,804 No, except, of course, for Mr. Dan Anchorman. 177 00:07:20,874 --> 00:07:23,775 You-- You are horrible little--! 178 00:07:25,412 --> 00:07:27,144 Wonderful tykes. 179 00:07:27,146 --> 00:07:30,314 I see I haven't appreciated your playful side. 180 00:07:30,316 --> 00:07:31,349 That's us. 181 00:07:31,351 --> 00:07:33,317 We're just fun-lovin' rascals. 182 00:07:33,319 --> 00:07:35,820 Exactly, and I'm going to make sure you get 183 00:07:35,822 --> 00:07:37,221 that tip I owe you. 184 00:07:37,223 --> 00:07:40,425 Really? Then we apologize about calling you cheap. 185 00:07:40,427 --> 00:07:43,728 Yeah, you're probably very generous, we hope. 186 00:07:43,730 --> 00:07:46,531 Why, thank you. And now here's your tip. 187 00:07:46,533 --> 00:07:49,200 Don't mess with an anchorman! 188 00:07:54,808 --> 00:07:56,307 [PANTING] 189 00:07:58,879 --> 00:08:00,378 [LAUGHING] 190 00:08:02,549 --> 00:08:04,982 Why'd he lock us in the control room? 191 00:08:04,984 --> 00:08:05,983 YAKKO: I don't know, 192 00:08:05,985 --> 00:08:08,586 maybe he wants us to direct. 193 00:08:08,588 --> 00:08:11,322 We apologize for the technical difficulties. 194 00:08:11,324 --> 00:08:14,025 I've been informed that everything is under control. 195 00:08:14,027 --> 00:08:16,193 "Ground Control to Major Tom. 196 00:08:16,195 --> 00:08:18,362 Commencing countdown, engines on." 197 00:08:22,936 --> 00:08:24,936 [♪♪♪] 198 00:08:26,740 --> 00:08:29,407 Hey, what's going on here? 199 00:08:29,409 --> 00:08:33,678 Uh, and now tonight's Newstime Live headlines. 200 00:08:33,680 --> 00:08:36,380 Not those headlines, these headlines. 201 00:08:36,382 --> 00:08:38,450 But first, our forecast. 202 00:08:38,452 --> 00:08:39,784 Large pointy things here, 203 00:08:39,786 --> 00:08:41,853 followed by big, fluffy gray things here. 204 00:08:41,855 --> 00:08:44,021 Isn't video technology keen? 205 00:08:44,023 --> 00:08:47,091 Ooh, it looks like some really bad dental work here. 206 00:08:47,093 --> 00:08:48,860 And if you're driving Hey, slow down! 207 00:08:48,862 --> 00:08:52,430 through here, don't worry, there's no brain in sight. 208 00:08:54,400 --> 00:08:55,834 I'm too good for this. 209 00:08:55,836 --> 00:08:58,002 His head looks bigger on TV. 210 00:08:58,004 --> 00:09:01,272 Well, I'll put a stop to that, my sib sister. 211 00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:05,443 [IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE] You can't do this to me. 212 00:09:05,445 --> 00:09:08,145 DAN: I'm a giant in this industry. 213 00:09:08,147 --> 00:09:10,782 Anybody mind if I see what else is on? 214 00:09:10,784 --> 00:09:11,783 [IN UNISON] Nope. 215 00:09:12,953 --> 00:09:15,019 [STATIC] 216 00:09:15,021 --> 00:09:17,889 Hey, little buddy. Where'd this guy come from? 217 00:09:17,891 --> 00:09:21,158 He's a space alien. Hit him with a coconut. 218 00:09:23,530 --> 00:09:26,163 Uh, seen that one. [CLICKS] 219 00:09:26,165 --> 00:09:28,199 [SCREAMING, BANGING] 220 00:09:29,102 --> 00:09:30,101 [CAMERA CLICKS] 221 00:09:31,805 --> 00:09:33,204 [CLICK] 222 00:09:33,206 --> 00:09:35,206 ANNOUNCER: And now Bulk Logan will take on 223 00:09:35,208 --> 00:09:37,141 some guy in a suit. 224 00:09:39,112 --> 00:09:41,546 Stop! Make it stop! Make it stop! 225 00:09:41,548 --> 00:09:42,580 I give up! [CLICK] 226 00:09:43,617 --> 00:09:46,150 [CHUCKLES] Ladies and gentlemen, 227 00:09:46,152 --> 00:09:48,720 I want to make a public apology 228 00:09:48,722 --> 00:09:52,089 for not tipping my sandwich-friends. 229 00:09:53,393 --> 00:09:55,393 And now for some sad news. 230 00:09:55,395 --> 00:09:57,529 The host of this news show, Dan Anchorman, 231 00:09:57,531 --> 00:10:00,364 was taken away today for a nice long rest. 232 00:10:00,366 --> 00:10:02,166 [GIGGLING MANIACALLY] 233 00:10:05,572 --> 00:10:07,906 And here's our tip for the day. 234 00:10:07,908 --> 00:10:10,875 Be real nice to people who handle your food. 235 00:10:10,877 --> 00:10:11,876 Or it's... 236 00:10:11,878 --> 00:10:13,477 [SNIFFLES] ...sad news. 237 00:10:13,479 --> 00:10:14,712 As for us... 238 00:10:14,714 --> 00:10:16,848 [IN UNISON] We are outta here! 239 00:10:20,286 --> 00:10:23,421 ANNOUNCER: It's time for another "Good Idea, Bad Idea." 240 00:10:24,658 --> 00:10:27,592 Good idea. 241 00:10:27,594 --> 00:10:29,761 Havin' breakfast served to you in bed. 242 00:10:31,698 --> 00:10:33,598 Bad idea. 243 00:10:33,600 --> 00:10:36,467 Havin' tennis balls served to you in bed. 244 00:10:39,873 --> 00:10:42,139 The end. 245 00:10:42,141 --> 00:10:44,308 ♪ When the birds hit The street ♪ 246 00:10:44,310 --> 00:10:45,877 ♪ Lookin' for food to eat ♪ 247 00:10:45,879 --> 00:10:47,045 ♪ That's Goodfeathers ♪ 248 00:10:47,047 --> 00:10:48,880 ♪ That's Goodfeathers ♪ 249 00:10:48,882 --> 00:10:51,883 ♪ When I'm cooin' at you And you're cooin' at me ♪ 250 00:10:51,885 --> 00:10:53,718 ♪ That's Goodfeathers ♪ 251 00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:56,153 ♪ Take no guff 'Cause they're tough ♪ 252 00:10:56,155 --> 00:10:58,022 ♪ Strut their stuff No cream puffs ♪ 253 00:10:58,024 --> 00:11:00,959 ♪ That's Goodfeathers ♪ 254 00:11:08,935 --> 00:11:12,837 SQUIT: As far back as I can remember, Bobby was a fighter. 255 00:11:12,839 --> 00:11:14,171 He had class. 256 00:11:14,173 --> 00:11:15,473 He could have been a contender, 257 00:11:15,475 --> 00:11:17,541 but he never fought professionally. 258 00:11:19,545 --> 00:11:20,544 [CROWD CHEERING] 259 00:11:20,546 --> 00:11:21,879 [BELL DINGS] 260 00:11:24,851 --> 00:11:26,784 You see, if you were a Goodfeather, 261 00:11:26,786 --> 00:11:28,019 you didn't have to fight 262 00:11:28,021 --> 00:11:30,354 to prove you were a tough bird to nobody, 263 00:11:30,356 --> 00:11:34,158 unless that nobody was a somebody, like Lana. 264 00:11:34,160 --> 00:11:37,261 Bada-bing, bang, boom! What a fight, huh? 265 00:11:37,263 --> 00:11:38,896 [YAWNS] 266 00:11:43,670 --> 00:11:44,902 [DINGS] 267 00:11:44,904 --> 00:11:47,805 And the winner by a beakout, 268 00:11:47,807 --> 00:11:52,343 the undefeated heavyweight beaking champion of the city, 269 00:11:52,345 --> 00:11:54,612 Pretty Boy Robin! 270 00:11:54,614 --> 00:11:56,114 [CHEERING, APPLAUDING] 271 00:11:59,318 --> 00:12:01,653 You could beak out Pretty Boy, Bobby. 272 00:12:01,655 --> 00:12:04,656 Win the purse, the title. You could do that. 273 00:12:04,658 --> 00:12:06,824 I could beak him down with one whack. 274 00:12:06,826 --> 00:12:08,292 No big deal. 275 00:12:08,294 --> 00:12:09,994 Yeah, he's a nothin'. 276 00:12:09,996 --> 00:12:11,562 Just good-looking, that's all. 277 00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:13,031 You think he's good-lookin'? 278 00:12:13,033 --> 00:12:15,633 I don't know. Everybody says he's good-looking. 279 00:12:15,635 --> 00:12:17,635 Who says he's good-lookin'? Do you say that? 280 00:12:17,637 --> 00:12:19,470 No way, not me. Forget about it. 281 00:12:19,472 --> 00:12:21,505 Well, he is kind of cute. 282 00:12:21,507 --> 00:12:23,041 Bada-bing. 283 00:12:25,745 --> 00:12:28,746 [COOS] Big shot, are you good-looking? 284 00:12:28,748 --> 00:12:30,214 I don't think so. 285 00:12:30,216 --> 00:12:31,215 [SNIFFS] 286 00:12:31,217 --> 00:12:32,684 Huh? Who is that? 287 00:12:32,686 --> 00:12:35,352 I don't know. Maybe it's the Big Bad Wolf. 288 00:12:35,354 --> 00:12:37,354 Yo, it's a Goodfeather. 289 00:12:37,356 --> 00:12:38,455 I been waitin' for years 290 00:12:38,457 --> 00:12:40,391 to get one of you tough birds in the ring. 291 00:12:40,393 --> 00:12:41,392 [CHUCKLES] 292 00:12:41,394 --> 00:12:43,194 I'll beak in the ring with you. 293 00:12:43,196 --> 00:12:44,361 [SNIFFS] Good. 294 00:12:44,363 --> 00:12:46,731 I'll see your beak in a week. 295 00:12:49,468 --> 00:12:51,669 [COOS] What did I get myself into? 296 00:12:51,671 --> 00:12:54,706 You got yourself into a fight with Pretty Boy, that's what. 297 00:12:54,708 --> 00:12:56,574 Unless you get a manager and some training, 298 00:12:56,576 --> 00:12:58,743 you got yourself a one-way ticket to Palookaville. 299 00:12:58,745 --> 00:12:59,777 That's what you got. 300 00:12:59,779 --> 00:13:01,045 He got a shot at the title, 301 00:13:01,047 --> 00:13:02,080 and he'll win too, 302 00:13:02,082 --> 00:13:03,981 'cause Pretty Boy's a nothin'. 303 00:13:03,983 --> 00:13:05,616 Just got a pretty face, that's all. 304 00:13:05,618 --> 00:13:08,186 Ooh, bada-bing! 305 00:13:08,188 --> 00:13:10,188 [♪♪♪] 306 00:13:16,629 --> 00:13:19,263 Relax, will ya? You're givin' me the zigzags over here. 307 00:13:19,265 --> 00:13:21,699 [COOS] I always said I could beak-out Pretty Boy, 308 00:13:21,701 --> 00:13:23,901 but I got these doubts, you know what I'm sayin'? 309 00:13:23,903 --> 00:13:25,269 Look at my wings. 310 00:13:25,271 --> 00:13:26,771 I got these small wings. 311 00:13:26,773 --> 00:13:28,239 I got little-girl wings. 312 00:13:28,241 --> 00:13:30,441 Do me a favor. I want you to whack me in the beak. 313 00:13:30,443 --> 00:13:31,542 Forget about it. 314 00:13:31,544 --> 00:13:33,144 Come on, whack me. Naw, I ain't. 315 00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:34,411 Come on, take your best shot. 316 00:13:34,413 --> 00:13:35,780 I ain't whacking ya. Come on. 317 00:13:35,782 --> 00:13:37,048 What are you trying to prove? 318 00:13:37,050 --> 00:13:38,282 Come on. What's it prove? 319 00:13:38,284 --> 00:13:39,683 Whack him, Pesto. 320 00:13:39,685 --> 00:13:42,053 I'd like to see you two in a round of whackin'. 321 00:13:46,860 --> 00:13:48,525 BOBBY: Come here. SQUIT: Hey! 322 00:13:48,527 --> 00:13:50,228 BOBBY: Here's some whackin' over here. 323 00:13:50,230 --> 00:13:52,864 Don't tell me what I gotta do. SQUIT: Come on, knock it off. 324 00:13:55,334 --> 00:13:56,333 [SMACKS] 325 00:13:56,335 --> 00:13:57,368 Hey, Lana. 326 00:13:57,370 --> 00:13:58,369 [COOING] 327 00:13:59,605 --> 00:14:00,805 Hey, Lana. How you doin'? 328 00:14:00,807 --> 00:14:03,474 I just wanted to stop by, give you a kiss, 329 00:14:03,476 --> 00:14:04,675 wish you luck for the fight. 330 00:14:04,677 --> 00:14:05,676 [SMACKS] 331 00:14:05,678 --> 00:14:07,178 I gotta go. See ya. 332 00:14:07,180 --> 00:14:09,147 Go ahead. 333 00:14:09,149 --> 00:14:10,948 Are you cooin' with my bird? What? 334 00:14:10,950 --> 00:14:12,150 Are you cooin' with my bird? 335 00:14:12,152 --> 00:14:13,918 How could you ask me a question like that? 336 00:14:13,920 --> 00:14:15,586 Just tell me. I'm not answerin' that. 337 00:14:15,588 --> 00:14:16,921 It's stupid. 338 00:14:16,923 --> 00:14:19,657 I'm gonna ask you again: Are you, or are you not? 339 00:14:19,659 --> 00:14:21,159 What? Come on, you're a wacko. 340 00:14:21,161 --> 00:14:23,094 No, this is a wacko. 341 00:14:23,096 --> 00:14:25,096 [♪♪♪] 342 00:14:27,500 --> 00:14:30,634 MAN: Word's out you need a manager, ya bum. 343 00:14:30,636 --> 00:14:32,069 With me in your corner, 344 00:14:32,071 --> 00:14:34,538 you got a shot at beatin' Pretty Boy Robin. 345 00:14:34,540 --> 00:14:37,741 [COOS] I'm crackin' up, hearin' voices over here. 346 00:14:37,743 --> 00:14:39,443 MAN: Down here, ya bum. 347 00:14:42,381 --> 00:14:43,647 [BOTH LAUGHING] 348 00:14:43,649 --> 00:14:45,416 [LAUGHING] 349 00:14:47,153 --> 00:14:50,822 Hoo-hoo. Look at Mr. Tough-Bird- the-Size-of-a-Pea over here. 350 00:14:50,824 --> 00:14:51,989 [CACKLING] 351 00:14:53,193 --> 00:14:55,526 The name is Max, ya bum. 352 00:14:55,528 --> 00:14:57,061 Now, this is the setup, see? 353 00:14:57,063 --> 00:15:00,064 I got a grudge to settle with P.B. Robin. 354 00:15:00,066 --> 00:15:02,533 Years ago before I got in the ring with that bird, 355 00:15:02,535 --> 00:15:04,135 I was the size of a dog! 356 00:15:04,137 --> 00:15:06,403 So I'm gonna manage ya, ya bum. 357 00:15:06,405 --> 00:15:09,273 And I'm gonna work ya into a wreckin' machine. 358 00:15:09,275 --> 00:15:10,274 Deal? 359 00:15:10,276 --> 00:15:11,275 Deal. 360 00:15:11,277 --> 00:15:13,277 [♪♪♪] 361 00:15:20,286 --> 00:15:22,153 BOBBY: Sweet Scorsese, what is that? 362 00:15:22,155 --> 00:15:23,921 We got movin' trees over here. 363 00:15:23,923 --> 00:15:26,057 Them ain't no trees, ya bum. 364 00:15:26,059 --> 00:15:27,325 Them is legs. 365 00:15:27,327 --> 00:15:29,327 That's One-Punch Paulie. 366 00:15:29,329 --> 00:15:31,329 He's your sparrin' partner. 367 00:15:31,331 --> 00:15:32,830 [SCREAMING] 368 00:15:34,567 --> 00:15:36,234 He's a bum, I tell ya, 369 00:15:36,236 --> 00:15:37,235 A bum. 370 00:15:37,703 --> 00:15:39,003 [GRUNTING] 371 00:15:39,005 --> 00:15:40,704 I'm the boss, I'm the boss, I'm the boss. 372 00:15:40,706 --> 00:15:41,705 [GRUNTING] 373 00:15:44,377 --> 00:15:45,776 Work it! Work it! 374 00:15:45,778 --> 00:15:48,012 You got what it takes to be a wreckin' machine? 375 00:15:48,014 --> 00:15:49,013 [BOBBY GRUNTING] 376 00:15:49,015 --> 00:15:50,014 BOBBY: I'm the boss-- 377 00:15:50,016 --> 00:15:51,015 [GRUNTS] 378 00:15:51,017 --> 00:15:53,684 Just what I need, a bum-sicle. 379 00:15:53,686 --> 00:15:55,686 [♪♪♪] 380 00:15:56,756 --> 00:15:58,256 [PANTING] 381 00:16:00,426 --> 00:16:01,458 [GROANS] 382 00:16:05,631 --> 00:16:07,698 You'll never be anything more than a bum, 383 00:16:07,700 --> 00:16:09,533 ya bum! 384 00:16:11,104 --> 00:16:12,803 Yo, why you callin' me a bum all the time? 385 00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:15,306 'Cause you're a bum, ya bum! 386 00:16:15,308 --> 00:16:16,540 Oh. 387 00:16:21,114 --> 00:16:23,414 [♪♪♪] 388 00:16:23,416 --> 00:16:24,715 [CHEERING] 389 00:16:27,086 --> 00:16:29,453 Max, what do you think my chances are? 390 00:16:29,455 --> 00:16:32,323 Did you do everything you wanted to do in life? 391 00:16:32,325 --> 00:16:33,624 No. Too bad. 392 00:16:33,626 --> 00:16:34,758 [BELL DINGS] 393 00:16:34,760 --> 00:16:37,128 SPECTATOR: Yeah! Come on! Pulverize him! 394 00:16:37,130 --> 00:16:38,963 [CHEERING] 395 00:16:45,104 --> 00:16:47,204 Touch beaks and come out flappin'. 396 00:16:48,707 --> 00:16:49,740 [SMOOCHES] 397 00:16:52,946 --> 00:16:54,412 [DINGS] 398 00:16:54,414 --> 00:16:55,413 [GRUNTING] 399 00:16:58,184 --> 00:16:59,583 [BOOING] 400 00:17:01,720 --> 00:17:02,719 [GRUNTS] 401 00:17:18,304 --> 00:17:20,338 Coo. I ain't gonna watch that. 402 00:17:20,340 --> 00:17:21,472 That's uglifyin'. 403 00:17:24,543 --> 00:17:26,043 [RAPID, HOLLOW TAPPING] 404 00:17:28,247 --> 00:17:30,214 [CROWD CHEERING] 405 00:17:30,216 --> 00:17:33,484 No way I'm goin' down. I don't go down for nobody. 406 00:17:33,486 --> 00:17:34,618 Psst. 407 00:17:34,620 --> 00:17:36,187 Bobby, you are down. 408 00:17:39,225 --> 00:17:41,959 Yo, Lana, wanna see my wingspan? 409 00:17:46,832 --> 00:17:48,466 Bada-bing. 410 00:17:50,603 --> 00:17:52,136 Are you cooi'' with my bird? 411 00:17:58,711 --> 00:18:00,211 [AS ROCKY] Yo, Adrian! 412 00:18:01,647 --> 00:18:03,414 [CHEERING] 413 00:18:03,416 --> 00:18:04,415 All right, Bobby! 414 00:18:04,417 --> 00:18:06,583 That was great, Bobby! That was great! 415 00:18:06,585 --> 00:18:07,584 [SMOOCHES] 416 00:18:12,025 --> 00:18:13,991 He ain't pretty no more. 417 00:18:13,993 --> 00:18:17,228 And the winner by unanimous decision, 418 00:18:17,230 --> 00:18:19,963 the new heavyweight beakin' champion of the city, 419 00:18:19,965 --> 00:18:22,400 Bobby Goodfeather! 420 00:18:22,402 --> 00:18:23,901 [CROWD CHEERING, APPLAUDING] 421 00:18:25,238 --> 00:18:27,471 PESTO: Congratulations, pal! SQUIT: You did it! 422 00:18:29,942 --> 00:18:31,642 Oh, look at the purse. 423 00:18:31,644 --> 00:18:34,345 [COOS] I never won so much seed in my life. 424 00:18:40,719 --> 00:18:42,219 [SPEAKING GIBBERISH] 425 00:18:44,390 --> 00:18:47,358 Now, the Godpigeon asks that as a bird of respect, 426 00:18:47,360 --> 00:18:49,660 I offer him a share of the purse. 427 00:18:57,136 --> 00:18:58,635 [SPEAKING GIBBERISH] 428 00:19:01,740 --> 00:19:04,442 The Godpigeon says he's been cooin' with my bird. 429 00:19:07,780 --> 00:19:09,813 Forget about it, Bobby. She'll be back. 430 00:19:09,815 --> 00:19:12,483 Attabird, Pesto, always the optimist. 431 00:19:12,485 --> 00:19:13,917 What do you mean by that? 432 00:19:13,919 --> 00:19:15,352 I said you're an optimist. 433 00:19:15,354 --> 00:19:16,954 An optimist? What are you sayin'? 434 00:19:16,956 --> 00:19:19,290 That I'm some kind of doctor here to test your vision? 435 00:19:19,292 --> 00:19:20,691 That I'm an eyeball inspector? 436 00:19:20,693 --> 00:19:22,593 That I make a spectacle of myself? 437 00:19:22,595 --> 00:19:23,760 Is that what you're sayin'? 438 00:19:23,762 --> 00:19:25,296 No, no, I'm not sayin' that. 439 00:19:25,298 --> 00:19:28,566 I'm just saying that you look on the bright side, an optimist. 440 00:19:28,568 --> 00:19:29,900 I am an optimist? 441 00:19:29,902 --> 00:19:31,902 Yeah, that's what I'm sayin'. 442 00:19:31,904 --> 00:19:32,903 That's it! Come here! 443 00:19:32,905 --> 00:19:34,271 [BOTH SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY] 444 00:19:34,273 --> 00:19:36,640 [LAUGHING] 445 00:19:36,642 --> 00:19:39,243 SQUIT: Bobby never fought in the ring again. 446 00:19:39,245 --> 00:19:42,246 He said he'd rather watch me and Pesto wing it out. 447 00:19:42,248 --> 00:19:44,081 Why? 'Cause... 448 00:19:44,083 --> 00:19:45,549 That's entertainment. 449 00:19:45,551 --> 00:19:47,050 [LAUGHING] 450 00:19:55,328 --> 00:19:58,595 NARRATOR: It's time for another "Good Idea, Bad Idea." 451 00:19:59,765 --> 00:20:01,698 Good idea. 452 00:20:01,700 --> 00:20:02,899 [♪♪♪] 453 00:20:02,901 --> 00:20:04,668 Whistling while you work. 454 00:20:04,670 --> 00:20:07,737 [WHISTLING "I'VE BEEN WORKING ON THE RAILROAD"] 455 00:20:11,210 --> 00:20:12,609 Bad idea. 456 00:20:13,745 --> 00:20:16,413 Whistling while you eat. 457 00:20:16,415 --> 00:20:19,316 [WHISTLING "I'VE BEEN WORKING ON THE RAILROAD"] 458 00:20:19,318 --> 00:20:20,817 [SPUTTERING] 459 00:20:26,925 --> 00:20:28,058 The end. 460 00:20:28,760 --> 00:20:30,760 [♪♪♪] 461 00:21:04,563 --> 00:21:06,330 It's over. Go away.