1
00:00:04,505 --> 00:00:06,271
[♪♪♪]
2
00:00:06,273 --> 00:00:09,941
ALL:
♪ It's time for Animaniacs ♪
3
00:00:09,943 --> 00:00:12,611
♪ And we're zany to the max ♪
4
00:00:12,613 --> 00:00:14,346
♪ So just sit back and relax ♪
5
00:00:14,348 --> 00:00:16,015
♪ You'll laugh
Till you collapse ♪
6
00:00:16,017 --> 00:00:18,417
♪ We're Animaniacs ♪
7
00:00:18,419 --> 00:00:20,219
BOTH:
♪ Come join
The Warner brothers ♪
8
00:00:20,221 --> 00:00:21,853
♪ And the Warner sister, Dot ♪
9
00:00:21,855 --> 00:00:24,856
ALL:
♪ Just for fun we run around
The Warner movie lot ♪
10
00:00:24,858 --> 00:00:27,526
♪ They lock us in the tower
Whenever we get caught ♪
11
00:00:27,528 --> 00:00:29,228
♪ But we break loose
And then vamoose ♪
12
00:00:29,230 --> 00:00:30,429
♪ And now you know the plot ♪
13
00:00:30,431 --> 00:00:32,964
♪ We're Animaniacs ♪
14
00:00:32,966 --> 00:00:35,934
♪ Dot is cute and Yakko yaks ♪
15
00:00:35,936 --> 00:00:37,269
♪ Wakko packs away the snacks ♪
16
00:00:37,271 --> 00:00:38,970
♪ While Bill Clinton
Plays the sax ♪
17
00:00:38,972 --> 00:00:41,040
♪ We're Animaniacs ♪
18
00:00:42,176 --> 00:00:43,375
♪ Meet Pinky and the Brain ♪
19
00:00:43,377 --> 00:00:44,876
♪ Who want to rule
The universe ♪
20
00:00:44,878 --> 00:00:46,245
♪ Goodfeathers flock together ♪
21
00:00:46,247 --> 00:00:47,779
♪ Slappy whacks 'em
With her purse ♪
22
00:00:47,781 --> 00:00:49,081
♪ Buttons chases Mindy ♪
23
00:00:49,083 --> 00:00:50,649
♪ While Rita sings a verse ♪
24
00:00:50,651 --> 00:00:52,384
♪ The writers flipped
We have no script ♪
25
00:00:52,386 --> 00:00:53,552
♪ Why bother to rehearse? ♪
26
00:00:53,554 --> 00:00:56,321
♪ We're Animaniacs ♪
27
00:00:56,323 --> 00:00:59,158
♪ We have pay-or-play
Contracts ♪
28
00:00:59,160 --> 00:01:00,559
♪ We're zany to the max ♪
29
00:01:00,561 --> 00:01:02,227
♪ There's bologna
In our slacks ♪
30
00:01:02,229 --> 00:01:03,795
♪ We're Animan-y ♪
31
00:01:03,797 --> 00:01:05,230
♪ Totally insane-y ♪
32
00:01:05,232 --> 00:01:06,698
Eisenhower, Mamie.
33
00:01:06,700 --> 00:01:08,900
♪ Animaniacs ♪
34
00:01:08,902 --> 00:01:10,369
♪ Those are the facts ♪
35
00:01:18,612 --> 00:01:20,678
[EXPLOSIONS]
36
00:01:24,418 --> 00:01:26,385
SQUIT:
As far back as I can remember,
37
00:01:26,387 --> 00:01:28,286
I always wanted to be a hero.
38
00:01:28,288 --> 00:01:31,189
If you became a hero,
then cute-looking sparrows
39
00:01:31,191 --> 00:01:33,858
would flock around you
and play kissy-fowl.
40
00:01:33,860 --> 00:01:36,261
Bobby and Pesto
loved that part.
41
00:01:36,263 --> 00:01:37,695
So when the war started,
42
00:01:37,697 --> 00:01:40,499
the Goodfeathers
signed up as messenger pigeons.
43
00:01:40,501 --> 00:01:42,967
At first, there didn't seem
to be much to it.
44
00:01:44,171 --> 00:01:45,904
[YAWNS]
I wish we'd see
some action.
45
00:01:45,906 --> 00:01:47,372
I'm tired of being
cooped up.
46
00:01:47,374 --> 00:01:49,474
I'm with you.
MAN 1: Situation is critical.
47
00:01:49,476 --> 00:01:51,076
MAN 2:
Enemy pressure is increasing.
48
00:01:51,078 --> 00:01:53,245
Lanford took my helmet, sir.
Make him give it back.
49
00:01:53,247 --> 00:01:55,947
[ALL YELLING INDISTINCTLY]
50
00:01:55,949 --> 00:01:57,549
Bada-bing,
what are they sayin'?
51
00:01:57,551 --> 00:01:59,384
Do I look like I know
what they're sayin'?
52
00:01:59,386 --> 00:02:01,219
I'm just askin'
what they're sayin'.
53
00:02:01,221 --> 00:02:03,188
How am I supposed to know
what they're sayin'?
54
00:02:03,190 --> 00:02:05,924
Am I fluent in Human?
Do I have mystic powers?
55
00:02:05,926 --> 00:02:08,427
Am I a swami, able to pluck
their very words from the air
56
00:02:08,429 --> 00:02:10,328
and present them to you
as a gift?
57
00:02:10,330 --> 00:02:12,630
Listen, you fat fowl.
I'll whack your wings off
58
00:02:12,632 --> 00:02:14,632
and make you the smallest
ostrich on the planet.
59
00:02:14,634 --> 00:02:16,935
They're sayin' somethin'.
What are they sayin'?
60
00:02:16,937 --> 00:02:18,736
SQUIT:
Hey, Bobby, Pesto. Coo it.
61
00:02:18,738 --> 00:02:19,871
Something's up.
62
00:02:19,873 --> 00:02:21,440
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
63
00:02:21,442 --> 00:02:22,840
General Storr, sir,
64
00:02:22,842 --> 00:02:24,976
the Ninth Brigade
is cut off behind enemy lines.
65
00:02:24,978 --> 00:02:26,178
They must retreat at once,
66
00:02:26,180 --> 00:02:27,912
or they'll be forced
to surrender.
67
00:02:27,914 --> 00:02:31,216
Very well. Just don't get
any dirt on my map.
68
00:02:31,218 --> 00:02:34,018
I'll order the Ninth Brigade
to retreat immediately.
69
00:02:34,020 --> 00:02:36,455
Bring me
the last messenger pigeons.
70
00:02:37,591 --> 00:02:38,590
This is it.
71
00:02:38,592 --> 00:02:39,891
Goin' into action.
72
00:02:39,893 --> 00:02:41,460
Mama Celeste!
73
00:02:44,298 --> 00:02:45,297
ALL:
Whoa!
74
00:02:48,802 --> 00:02:50,602
GENERAL STORR:
Pigeons are so dirty.
75
00:02:50,604 --> 00:02:52,204
Why don't we have
messenger cats?
76
00:02:52,206 --> 00:02:54,473
They're much cleaner animals.
77
00:02:54,475 --> 00:02:57,109
Don't Squit's new jewelry
look adorable?
78
00:02:57,111 --> 00:02:58,577
[LAUGHS]
79
00:02:58,579 --> 00:02:59,578
[SNICKERS]
80
00:02:59,580 --> 00:03:01,346
He's a regular Mia Sparrow.
81
00:03:01,348 --> 00:03:03,948
[BOTH LAUGH]
82
00:03:03,950 --> 00:03:05,617
[WHISTLES]
To the front.
83
00:03:05,619 --> 00:03:06,651
BOBBY:
Follow me.
84
00:03:06,653 --> 00:03:08,320
PESTO:
What do ya mean, you? Follow me.
85
00:03:08,322 --> 00:03:09,621
BOBBY:
I don't follow nobody.
86
00:03:09,623 --> 00:03:11,456
PESTO:
Oh, yeah?
Watch my tail feathers.
87
00:03:11,458 --> 00:03:13,658
Let's look
into messenger cats.
88
00:03:13,660 --> 00:03:15,994
[♪♪♪]
89
00:03:15,996 --> 00:03:17,829
Ah, this hero stuff is nothin'.
90
00:03:17,831 --> 00:03:19,964
A perch in the park,
know what I'm sayin'?
91
00:03:19,966 --> 00:03:21,366
You're right,
Bobby.
92
00:03:21,368 --> 00:03:23,668
Any of those miserable,
egg-suckin' enemies show up,
93
00:03:23,670 --> 00:03:25,337
I'll whack 'em
into another time zone.
94
00:03:30,410 --> 00:03:31,576
I mean it.
95
00:03:31,578 --> 00:03:34,479
I'll really whack 'em.
96
00:03:34,481 --> 00:03:35,980
[ALL SCREAM]
97
00:03:45,792 --> 00:03:47,592
[ALL SCREAM]
98
00:03:56,069 --> 00:03:59,037
Topo Gigio, look at this
miserable place here.
99
00:04:11,251 --> 00:04:13,518
Some heroes
we turned out to be.
100
00:04:13,520 --> 00:04:15,187
Are you calling me a hero?
101
00:04:15,189 --> 00:04:17,255
I was just sayin'
that we're supposed to deliver
102
00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:19,391
this message and be heroes,
ya know?
103
00:04:19,393 --> 00:04:22,527
No, I don't know. You tell me.
Are you sayin' I'm a hero?
104
00:04:22,529 --> 00:04:24,362
That I'm some kind of
large sandwich
105
00:04:24,364 --> 00:04:25,997
filled with lunchmeat
and lettuce
106
00:04:25,999 --> 00:04:27,399
sent here to nourish you?
107
00:04:27,401 --> 00:04:29,501
Nah, Pesto, I just meant
we're not the heroes
108
00:04:29,503 --> 00:04:31,069
we thought we'd be.
109
00:04:31,071 --> 00:04:32,103
That's it!
110
00:04:32,105 --> 00:04:33,238
Come here!
111
00:04:33,240 --> 00:04:34,939
SQUIT:
Come on! Hey! That's my beak.
112
00:04:34,941 --> 00:04:36,474
PESTO:
You dirty little squab.
113
00:04:36,476 --> 00:04:38,443
You sack-jawed pelican.
114
00:04:38,445 --> 00:04:39,911
Forget about it.
115
00:04:39,913 --> 00:04:42,314
We got enough troubles here
with the message to deliver,
116
00:04:42,316 --> 00:04:44,849
and all that miserable flak
coverin' the sky up there.
117
00:04:44,851 --> 00:04:47,686
Bobby's right. Let's stay
on the ground for a while.
118
00:04:47,688 --> 00:04:49,254
It's safer down here.
119
00:04:52,559 --> 00:04:55,093
Oh, Pesto,
what's that sign say?
120
00:04:55,095 --> 00:04:57,028
How do I know
what it says?
121
00:04:57,030 --> 00:04:58,463
Am I a dictionary?
122
00:04:58,465 --> 00:05:01,065
Is the word "thesaurus"
printed on me?
123
00:05:01,067 --> 00:05:03,568
Am I some sort of vast,
living pool of knowledge
124
00:05:03,570 --> 00:05:05,737
here for the sole purpose
of enlightening you?
125
00:05:05,739 --> 00:05:08,473
I just asked, what's it say?
126
00:05:08,475 --> 00:05:10,174
What's the matter with you,
Pesto?
127
00:05:10,176 --> 00:05:11,175
[COOS]
128
00:05:15,081 --> 00:05:17,649
It says,
"Thanks for droppin' in.
129
00:05:17,651 --> 00:05:19,884
Hope ya had a blast."
130
00:05:19,886 --> 00:05:21,720
[AIRPLANE ENGINES WHIRRING]
131
00:05:23,757 --> 00:05:26,924
Over there! We'll hide
in that stinkin' hole.
132
00:05:26,926 --> 00:05:28,192
[ARTILLERY WHISTLING]
133
00:05:28,194 --> 00:05:29,694
[ALL SCREAMING]
134
00:05:38,138 --> 00:05:41,573
Relax. You never hear
the one that gets ya.
135
00:05:45,579 --> 00:05:47,011
ALL:
Aagh!
136
00:05:47,013 --> 00:05:48,713
[ALL GROAN]
137
00:05:49,949 --> 00:05:51,983
So, what else can happen?
138
00:05:52,952 --> 00:05:54,852
[ALL SCREAMING]
139
00:05:58,325 --> 00:05:59,691
"What else can happen?"
140
00:05:59,693 --> 00:06:02,327
You had to say that you goofy,
bug-suckin' bat.
141
00:06:02,329 --> 00:06:03,995
Ragú!
You gabby little hatchling.
142
00:06:03,997 --> 00:06:05,664
Oh, come on!
Oh, cut it out!
143
00:06:05,666 --> 00:06:07,699
Not the beak again!
Oh, come on!
144
00:06:09,035 --> 00:06:10,735
Give it some wing,
Squit.
145
00:06:10,737 --> 00:06:14,739
That message ain't gettin' any
fresher, know what I'm sayin'?
146
00:06:14,741 --> 00:06:16,608
It ain't gettin' any lighter,
either.
147
00:06:22,683 --> 00:06:25,983
Mario Lanza!
We got company back here.
148
00:06:40,166 --> 00:06:41,966
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
149
00:06:52,212 --> 00:06:55,513
BOBBY:
Well, Squit's run outta tricks.
We gotta do somethin' fast here.
150
00:07:02,222 --> 00:07:03,421
Decrescendo!
151
00:07:03,423 --> 00:07:04,856
Anything hits this balloon,
152
00:07:04,858 --> 00:07:06,924
we're gonna be
Kentucky Fried Pigeons.
153
00:07:06,926 --> 00:07:09,227
Yeah. They blow up easier
than you.
154
00:07:12,399 --> 00:07:14,399
♪ Ahhhh ♪
155
00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:16,801
Aha.
156
00:07:16,803 --> 00:07:18,803
[♪♪♪]
157
00:07:27,714 --> 00:07:29,080
Are you sure
this is gonna work?
158
00:07:29,082 --> 00:07:30,448
How do you know
it's gonna work?
159
00:07:30,450 --> 00:07:32,350
Listen,
you banana-faced toucan,
160
00:07:32,352 --> 00:07:35,620
you've been in a particularly
bad mood this entire episode.
161
00:07:35,622 --> 00:07:37,422
Now, get Squit.
162
00:07:42,228 --> 00:07:44,228
Ow, Mona Lisa!
163
00:07:45,965 --> 00:07:47,131
Follow me.
164
00:07:47,133 --> 00:07:48,800
Where
are we going?
165
00:07:48,802 --> 00:07:50,468
Toward the sun.
166
00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:53,204
It's in outer space.
We'll never make it.
167
00:07:55,074 --> 00:07:57,074
[♪♪♪]
168
00:08:24,404 --> 00:08:26,037
What a great idea.
169
00:08:26,039 --> 00:08:27,939
Which wise guy
thought that up?
170
00:08:27,941 --> 00:08:30,341
That was me.
I must be part owl.
171
00:08:30,343 --> 00:08:32,410
Hey, Bobby don't get ideas
too often,
172
00:08:32,412 --> 00:08:35,012
but when he does
they're regular cappuccinos.
173
00:08:40,153 --> 00:08:42,286
Brilliant attack,
General Storr.
174
00:08:42,288 --> 00:08:43,688
Thank you,
General Admission.
175
00:08:43,690 --> 00:08:45,623
I was able to sweep the enemy
from the field,
176
00:08:45,625 --> 00:08:46,691
dust his flanks,
177
00:08:46,693 --> 00:08:48,626
and wash and wax
his rear echelons.
178
00:08:48,628 --> 00:08:50,161
But I never would have
had to attack
179
00:08:50,163 --> 00:08:52,964
if you hadn't ignored
my message to retreat.
180
00:08:52,966 --> 00:08:54,833
Why did you ignore
my message?
181
00:08:54,835 --> 00:08:56,634
What message?
182
00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:06,010
Why, I guess you mean
this message.
183
00:09:06,012 --> 00:09:07,579
[BOTH LAUGH]
184
00:09:08,815 --> 00:09:10,715
GENERAL STORR:
Oh, jolly good.
185
00:09:10,717 --> 00:09:14,118
SQUIT:
Yeah, they sure were happy
to get our message.
186
00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:16,354
And so we were heroes.
187
00:09:16,356 --> 00:09:18,656
We couldn't wait to get back
to the States, though,
188
00:09:18,658 --> 00:09:20,324
'cause we wanted everybody
to know
189
00:09:20,326 --> 00:09:22,226
what bigtime heroes we were.
190
00:09:22,228 --> 00:09:24,662
Too bad we didn't get
any medals.
191
00:09:24,664 --> 00:09:26,163
But I guess they just
don't have any
192
00:09:26,165 --> 00:09:28,165
big enough for us Goodfeathers.
193
00:09:28,167 --> 00:09:30,267
"Big?"
What do you mean by "big"?
194
00:09:30,269 --> 00:09:32,069
Are you tryin' to say I'm fat?
195
00:09:32,071 --> 00:09:35,439
Some kind of roly-poly chicken
leg for your matzo ball soup?
196
00:09:35,441 --> 00:09:38,576
A chunk of fat meant to up
your cholesterol level?
197
00:09:38,578 --> 00:09:41,379
Oh, no. I just meant that we're,
like, big shots, ya know?
198
00:09:41,381 --> 00:09:42,814
Heavy hitters.
199
00:09:42,816 --> 00:09:45,449
Ah, now I'm a heavy hitter.
200
00:09:45,451 --> 00:09:47,318
I'll give ya a heavy hit
in the head.
201
00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:48,920
Here. Take that.
I'll give you "big."
202
00:09:48,922 --> 00:09:51,088
SQUIT: Oh, come on!
PESTO: I'll give you Tom Hanks
203
00:09:51,090 --> 00:09:52,991
upside the head, that's what!
[LAUGHS]
204
00:09:52,993 --> 00:09:56,394
PESTO:
Hey, mostaccioli!
Come here. Here!
205
00:10:05,137 --> 00:10:07,137
[♪♪♪]
206
00:10:09,242 --> 00:10:13,878
SERGEANT:
Left, left, left, right, left.
207
00:10:13,880 --> 00:10:15,980
♪ Recruits smell
And that's no lie ♪
208
00:10:15,982 --> 00:10:18,249
♪ Hate your guts
Gonna make you cry ♪
209
00:10:18,251 --> 00:10:20,485
♪ Call me smart
Call me inspired ♪
210
00:10:20,487 --> 00:10:22,820
♪ You're gonna march
Till I get tired ♪
211
00:10:22,822 --> 00:10:25,256
I love my job.
212
00:10:25,258 --> 00:10:27,759
Hey, sarge.
The new recruits are here.
213
00:10:27,761 --> 00:10:29,026
Fresh meat.
214
00:10:29,028 --> 00:10:30,027
[CHUCKLES]
215
00:10:30,597 --> 00:10:31,596
Oof!
216
00:10:43,743 --> 00:10:45,175
YAKKO:
Excuse us. pardon us.
217
00:10:45,177 --> 00:10:48,679
Coming through.
Ah, summer camp at last.
218
00:10:48,681 --> 00:10:50,981
Eight weeks of fun, fun, fun.
219
00:10:50,983 --> 00:10:52,950
Swimming and canoe racing.
220
00:10:52,952 --> 00:10:54,852
Mosquitoes and bear attacks.
221
00:10:54,854 --> 00:10:56,454
And not just any old camp...
222
00:10:56,456 --> 00:10:58,456
boot camp.
223
00:10:58,458 --> 00:10:59,724
[SIGHS]
224
00:10:59,726 --> 00:11:02,960
Like Imelda Marcos,
I've always adored boots.
225
00:11:03,763 --> 00:11:05,830
Hello, nurse.
226
00:11:06,666 --> 00:11:08,533
Hi, Mr. Camp Counselor.
227
00:11:08,535 --> 00:11:10,301
I'd like size three
EEE boots
228
00:11:10,303 --> 00:11:12,670
with fringe and little pink bows
on the toes, please.
229
00:11:12,672 --> 00:11:14,038
Get back in line, soldier.
230
00:11:14,040 --> 00:11:15,039
[SNIFFS]
231
00:11:15,041 --> 00:11:16,908
Ew, who's P-yew?
232
00:11:17,610 --> 00:11:18,609
[GIGGLES]
233
00:11:18,611 --> 00:11:20,010
Psst! Down here.
234
00:11:20,012 --> 00:11:22,647
Say, is there a girls' camp
across the lake?
235
00:11:22,649 --> 00:11:25,650
You know...
Hello, nurse.
236
00:11:25,652 --> 00:11:26,684
Fall in!
237
00:11:28,220 --> 00:11:29,454
Get up!
238
00:11:29,456 --> 00:11:30,755
Now, fall in!
239
00:11:30,757 --> 00:11:32,790
Get up and fall in!
240
00:11:32,792 --> 00:11:34,358
Is this part
of our camp initiation?
241
00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:36,393
Frankly, we'd prefer
the spanking machine.
242
00:11:37,196 --> 00:11:38,696
Get up and get in line!
243
00:11:38,698 --> 00:11:41,131
Well, why didn't you say that
in the first place?
244
00:11:41,133 --> 00:11:42,399
Who do you think you are?
245
00:11:42,401 --> 00:11:45,336
We think, therefore we are
the Warner brothers.
246
00:11:45,338 --> 00:11:47,705
And the Warner sister.
247
00:11:47,707 --> 00:11:49,406
WAKKO:
Glad to make my acquaintance.
248
00:11:50,443 --> 00:11:51,576
[GRUNTS]
249
00:11:51,578 --> 00:11:53,911
Give me that back,
you little Gila monster.
250
00:11:53,913 --> 00:11:55,546
All of it, Wakko.
251
00:12:02,221 --> 00:12:03,220
[GASPS]
252
00:12:03,222 --> 00:12:04,221
[CHUCKLES]
253
00:12:05,992 --> 00:12:06,991
[GIGGLES]
254
00:12:06,993 --> 00:12:08,559
Excuse me, Mr. Camp Counselor,
255
00:12:08,561 --> 00:12:10,862
but, uh, when do we get to sing
"Kumbaya"?
256
00:12:10,864 --> 00:12:12,997
I am not
a camp counselor.
257
00:12:12,999 --> 00:12:15,132
I am
your drill instructor.
258
00:12:15,134 --> 00:12:17,101
This is the Army, soldier!
259
00:12:17,103 --> 00:12:18,168
The Army?
260
00:12:18,170 --> 00:12:19,504
Well, it's been fun.
Gotta go.
261
00:12:19,506 --> 00:12:21,071
Buh-bye.
262
00:12:21,073 --> 00:12:22,106
Get back here.
263
00:12:25,044 --> 00:12:26,944
From now on,
this Army will be your home.
264
00:12:26,946 --> 00:12:29,213
I will be your mother, father,
aunt and uncle.
265
00:12:29,215 --> 00:12:31,448
ALL:
A family!
266
00:12:31,450 --> 00:12:33,551
Mwah, mwah, mwah!
267
00:12:33,553 --> 00:12:36,554
Stop that, you-- You-- You--
268
00:12:36,556 --> 00:12:37,855
What are you, anyway?
269
00:12:37,857 --> 00:12:40,491
Infested with fleas.
270
00:12:42,695 --> 00:12:44,695
[♪♪♪]
271
00:12:58,778 --> 00:13:00,344
Oh, take off your hat.
272
00:13:01,113 --> 00:13:02,346
Oh, that one too.
273
00:13:02,348 --> 00:13:03,714
Uh, that one too.
274
00:13:04,350 --> 00:13:05,516
Ooh.
275
00:13:05,518 --> 00:13:06,817
Hm.
276
00:13:06,819 --> 00:13:07,985
[GROWLS]
277
00:13:07,987 --> 00:13:09,587
Hat's all, folks.
278
00:13:09,589 --> 00:13:11,622
Behave yourself
or I'll get real mad.
279
00:13:11,624 --> 00:13:13,624
Oh, yes I will, real mad.
280
00:13:25,538 --> 00:13:27,672
[STAMMERING]
Ooh, ah, oh.
281
00:13:29,609 --> 00:13:30,875
[CHUCKLES]
282
00:13:39,085 --> 00:13:40,885
And I thought Opie was naughty.
283
00:13:47,226 --> 00:13:49,760
WAKKO:
I don't want to be
in the Army, Yakko.
284
00:13:49,762 --> 00:13:52,863
What are we gonna do?
285
00:13:52,865 --> 00:13:55,132
I'm leaning heavily
toward fleeing.
286
00:13:57,103 --> 00:13:58,903
To the left,
right, left.
287
00:13:58,905 --> 00:14:02,539
Your left. To the left.
To the left, right, left.
288
00:14:02,541 --> 00:14:04,709
♪ I don't know
But I've been told ♪
289
00:14:04,711 --> 00:14:06,844
♪ Army life is mighty bold ♪
290
00:14:06,846 --> 00:14:08,679
♪ Every night before retreat-- ♪
291
00:14:08,681 --> 00:14:10,648
♪ We order out
For luncheon meat ♪
292
00:14:12,585 --> 00:14:14,218
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
293
00:14:14,220 --> 00:14:17,354
Platoon, get back
to the barracks.
294
00:14:18,591 --> 00:14:20,758
As for you three,
I've had it.
295
00:14:20,760 --> 00:14:22,960
Good. Does that mean
we can leave?
296
00:14:22,962 --> 00:14:25,663
No, Private Cute Boots.
297
00:14:25,665 --> 00:14:28,499
From now on, I'm training you
to become agents
298
00:14:28,501 --> 00:14:30,134
of total destruction.
299
00:14:30,136 --> 00:14:33,638
But we don't want to be mailmen.
We'd rather work for a living.
300
00:14:47,486 --> 00:14:48,953
Detail, halt.
301
00:14:50,089 --> 00:14:53,323
A foxhole
is a soldier's best friend.
302
00:14:53,325 --> 00:14:55,092
Must be hard
to go to the movies together.
303
00:14:55,094 --> 00:14:56,293
Dig!
304
00:14:59,065 --> 00:15:00,064
Huh?
305
00:15:02,434 --> 00:15:05,069
ALL:
We'd move if we were you.
306
00:15:05,071 --> 00:15:06,303
[SCREAMS]
307
00:15:09,408 --> 00:15:11,475
Did we dig it deep enough?
308
00:15:11,477 --> 00:15:12,810
[THUMP]
309
00:15:18,217 --> 00:15:20,217
SWEETE:
This is the grenade range.
310
00:15:20,219 --> 00:15:26,123
You will learn all about
the standard M26-A1-F472918-A
311
00:15:26,125 --> 00:15:28,025
fragmentation device.
312
00:15:28,027 --> 00:15:29,927
Just pull the pin and throw.
313
00:15:37,636 --> 00:15:39,269
Throw the grenade!
314
00:15:40,306 --> 00:15:41,972
You said
throw the pin.
315
00:15:41,974 --> 00:15:45,009
I meant pull the pin
and throw the grenade!
316
00:15:45,011 --> 00:15:46,911
I'm all confused.
You do it.
317
00:15:52,752 --> 00:15:54,418
[GROANS]
318
00:15:54,420 --> 00:15:56,420
[♪♪♪]
319
00:16:01,928 --> 00:16:04,061
SWEETE:
Normally,
parachuting is reserved
320
00:16:04,063 --> 00:16:06,663
for well-trained, elite troops.
321
00:16:06,665 --> 00:16:09,566
But in your case,
I'm gonna make an exception.
322
00:16:09,568 --> 00:16:11,001
[CHUCKLES]
323
00:16:11,771 --> 00:16:13,738
SWEETE:
Geronimo!
324
00:16:14,707 --> 00:16:16,807
ALL:
Sitting Bull!
325
00:16:18,945 --> 00:16:21,678
By the way, we took your dirty
sheets to the laundry.
326
00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:23,080
What dirty sheets?
327
00:16:23,082 --> 00:16:24,749
The ones you stuffed
in your knapsack.
328
00:16:24,751 --> 00:16:25,816
Huh?
329
00:16:26,652 --> 00:16:28,352
Aaah!
330
00:16:28,354 --> 00:16:29,353
Ohhh!
331
00:16:30,689 --> 00:16:32,322
No starch, right?
332
00:16:32,324 --> 00:16:33,924
[SCREAMS]
333
00:16:38,898 --> 00:16:41,632
Don't worry, kids.
It's almost over.
334
00:16:44,436 --> 00:16:47,371
Come on, guys.
Let's go camping.
335
00:16:47,373 --> 00:16:51,876
Build a campfire, make s'mores,
sing songs. Come on.
336
00:16:51,878 --> 00:16:53,244
ALL:
♪ Do your ears hang low? ♪
337
00:16:53,246 --> 00:16:54,912
♪ Do they wobble to and fro? ♪
338
00:16:54,914 --> 00:16:57,148
♪ Can you tie 'em in a knot?
Can you tie 'em in a bow? ♪
339
00:16:57,150 --> 00:16:58,816
♪ Can you throw 'em
Over your shoulder ♪
340
00:16:58,818 --> 00:17:00,217
♪ Like a Continental soldier? ♪
341
00:17:00,219 --> 00:17:02,153
♪ Do your ears hang low? ♪
342
00:17:03,455 --> 00:17:04,454
Camp is okay,
343
00:17:04,456 --> 00:17:06,857
but these pink boots
are killing me.
344
00:17:09,728 --> 00:17:11,728
[♪♪♪]
345
00:17:13,866 --> 00:17:16,900
♪ Chicken Boo
What's the matter with you? ♪
346
00:17:16,902 --> 00:17:21,538
♪ You don't act
Like the other chickens do ♪
347
00:17:21,540 --> 00:17:24,041
♪ You wear a disguise
To look like human guys ♪
348
00:17:24,043 --> 00:17:27,345
♪ But you're not a man
You're a chicken, Boo ♪
349
00:17:37,623 --> 00:17:39,623
[♪♪♪]
350
00:17:48,767 --> 00:17:53,337
I'm so hungry I could eat
the hind shank of a porcupine.
351
00:17:53,339 --> 00:17:57,741
I could eat a whole porcupine,
plus the front shank of a skunk.
352
00:17:57,743 --> 00:18:00,444
I could eat me a whole
porcupine, a whole skunk,
353
00:18:00,446 --> 00:18:02,946
a weasel's giblets,
and the horse you rode in on.
354
00:18:02,948 --> 00:18:04,648
[HORSE SNORTS]
[GASPS]
355
00:18:04,650 --> 00:18:06,783
SOLDIER:
It's Lieutenant Colonel Sanders.
356
00:18:08,321 --> 00:18:09,553
At ease, men.
357
00:18:09,555 --> 00:18:11,122
I got news.
358
00:18:11,124 --> 00:18:13,790
Y'all heard
of General Boo-Regard?
359
00:18:13,792 --> 00:18:16,727
Only that he's the greatest
soldier ever lived.
360
00:18:16,729 --> 00:18:19,363
Well, he's coming to lead us
to victory at Appomattox.
361
00:18:19,365 --> 00:18:20,531
[HORSE WHINNIES]
362
00:18:22,568 --> 00:18:23,667
[GASPS]
363
00:18:23,669 --> 00:18:25,569
It's General Boo-Regard.
364
00:18:25,571 --> 00:18:27,304
Attention!
365
00:18:27,306 --> 00:18:29,306
[♪♪♪]
366
00:18:34,947 --> 00:18:38,049
Lieutenant Colonel Sanders
at your service, general.
367
00:18:41,220 --> 00:18:43,521
General Boo-Regard,
we done hear tell
368
00:18:43,523 --> 00:18:45,923
you whupped General Grant
at Shiloh.
369
00:18:45,925 --> 00:18:49,160
We done hear tell you beat
General Sherman in Atlanta.
370
00:18:49,162 --> 00:18:50,894
I done hear tell
you're a chicken.
371
00:18:50,896 --> 00:18:52,196
[BOTH GASP]
372
00:18:54,400 --> 00:18:55,566
You yellow-bellied--
373
00:18:55,568 --> 00:18:57,068
Two-bit, Yankee-loving--
374
00:18:57,070 --> 00:18:59,070
--cotton-brained boll weevil.
375
00:18:59,072 --> 00:19:00,104
[CHUCKLES]
376
00:19:00,106 --> 00:19:02,106
Uh, he didn't mean that, sir.
377
00:19:02,108 --> 00:19:06,110
He's just hungry,
and hungry men say crazy things.
378
00:19:06,112 --> 00:19:08,612
Ain't not so too
'cause I'm hungry.
379
00:19:08,614 --> 00:19:10,181
He's a chicken, I tell ya...
380
00:19:11,517 --> 00:19:14,051
The South will rise again.
381
00:19:14,053 --> 00:19:16,920
Three cheers
for General Boo-Regard.
382
00:19:16,922 --> 00:19:18,755
Hip, hip, hooray!
383
00:19:18,757 --> 00:19:22,626
ALL:
Hip, hip, hooray!
Hip, hip, hooray!
384
00:19:26,599 --> 00:19:29,066
Their commanding general
is Boo-Regard.
385
00:19:29,068 --> 00:19:30,801
They call him
the scourge of the South.
386
00:19:30,803 --> 00:19:32,069
He don't take prisoners.
387
00:19:32,071 --> 00:19:33,237
We're done for.
388
00:19:41,314 --> 00:19:42,546
[WHINNIES]
389
00:19:42,548 --> 00:19:43,947
[CLUCKING]
390
00:19:45,718 --> 00:19:47,251
[GASPS]
[GASPS]
[GASPS]
391
00:19:48,387 --> 00:19:49,886
Ha! He's a chicken.
392
00:19:49,888 --> 00:19:50,887
[BOTH LAUGH]
393
00:19:50,889 --> 00:19:52,055
[CLUCKING]
394
00:19:56,795 --> 00:19:58,462
[CLUCKING]
395
00:19:58,464 --> 00:20:00,731
I told you
that guy's a chicken.
396
00:20:00,733 --> 00:20:03,534
A chicken big enough
to feed an army.
397
00:20:08,441 --> 00:20:09,673
Hold it, fellers.
398
00:20:09,675 --> 00:20:11,742
That there chicken's
big enough to feed an army.
399
00:20:14,780 --> 00:20:16,147
Ba-kaw--!
400
00:20:18,184 --> 00:20:19,683
[CHICKEN BOO CLUCKING]
401
00:20:25,224 --> 00:20:28,159
♪ You wear a disguise
To look like human guys ♪
402
00:20:28,161 --> 00:20:31,395
♪ But you're not a man
You're a chicken, Boo ♪
403
00:20:36,436 --> 00:20:38,435
[♪♪♪]
404
00:21:03,129 --> 00:21:04,761
Hey. Stay coo.