1 00:00:00,959 --> 00:00:02,419 Ah-hyuck! 2 00:00:02,502 --> 00:00:04,592 ♪ H-h-h-hit it ♪ 3 00:00:04,671 --> 00:00:06,421 ♪ Like father, like son ♪ 4 00:00:07,340 --> 00:00:08,630 ♪ You're always number one ♪ 5 00:00:08,717 --> 00:00:09,717 [both] Yes! 6 00:00:09,801 --> 00:00:11,551 ♪ There's buddies There's pals ♪ 7 00:00:11,636 --> 00:00:12,506 Yeah! 8 00:00:12,595 --> 00:00:14,885 ♪ You always seem to work things out ♪ 9 00:00:14,973 --> 00:00:16,683 ♪ Can't you see you're two of a kind ♪ 10 00:00:16,766 --> 00:00:18,766 ♪ Lookin' for a real good time ♪ 11 00:00:18,852 --> 00:00:19,692 Whoa! 12 00:00:20,353 --> 00:00:21,313 ♪ A real good time ♪ 13 00:00:21,396 --> 00:00:22,306 Aah! 14 00:00:22,731 --> 00:00:24,271 ♪ Report to the Goof Troop ♪ 15 00:00:24,357 --> 00:00:26,567 ♪ And we'll always stick together ♪ 16 00:00:26,651 --> 00:00:27,741 ♪ Always stick together ♪ 17 00:00:27,819 --> 00:00:29,399 ♪ We're the Goof Troop ♪ 18 00:00:29,487 --> 00:00:31,817 ♪ The best of friends forever ♪ 19 00:00:33,158 --> 00:00:35,538 ♪ Side by side wherever we go ♪ 20 00:00:35,618 --> 00:00:39,958 ♪ We're always ready to roll ♪ 21 00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:41,290 ♪ Now gimme a beat ♪ 22 00:00:41,374 --> 00:00:42,834 ♪ We're the Goof Troop ♪ 23 00:00:42,917 --> 00:00:45,497 ♪ And we always stick together ♪ 24 00:00:45,587 --> 00:00:46,417 Gawrsh! 25 00:00:46,504 --> 00:00:47,384 ♪ We're the Goof Troop ♪ 26 00:00:47,464 --> 00:00:50,594 ♪ The best of friends forever ♪ 27 00:00:51,509 --> 00:00:53,889 ♪ Now we're calling everyone ♪ 28 00:00:53,970 --> 00:00:55,930 ♪ Come along and join the fun ♪ 29 00:00:56,014 --> 00:00:57,024 ♪ Report to the Goof Troop ♪ 30 00:00:57,098 --> 00:00:58,888 ♪ Baa ba doo da bop baa ba doo bop ♪ 31 00:00:58,975 --> 00:00:59,845 Yeah! 32 00:01:00,185 --> 00:01:02,225 [Bob] Charge, men! We got them on the run! 33 00:01:02,312 --> 00:01:03,772 [P.J.] Look out, Max! 34 00:01:03,855 --> 00:01:05,145 [Max] Retreat! 35 00:01:05,231 --> 00:01:07,111 [rooster crows] 36 00:01:07,192 --> 00:01:11,452 [objects clattering] 37 00:01:12,030 --> 00:01:13,700 [snoring] 38 00:01:18,995 --> 00:01:20,075 You see him? 39 00:01:20,163 --> 00:01:21,753 [panting] Nah. We lost him. 40 00:01:21,831 --> 00:01:23,121 [meow] 41 00:01:25,710 --> 00:01:26,840 [whimpers] 42 00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:29,050 [Max] He'll never find us here. 43 00:01:30,548 --> 00:01:32,128 Surprise! 44 00:01:32,217 --> 00:01:34,137 [both] Ambush! 45 00:01:35,679 --> 00:01:37,099 Retreat! 46 00:01:38,515 --> 00:01:40,555 Cool your jets, Peej. 47 00:01:40,642 --> 00:01:42,892 Max, we've gotta regroup! 48 00:01:42,977 --> 00:01:44,147 No, we don't. 49 00:01:44,229 --> 00:01:45,979 We got him where we want him. 50 00:01:46,064 --> 00:01:48,404 We got-- Oh, yeah. 51 00:01:49,442 --> 00:01:51,492 Come on out, general. 52 00:01:51,569 --> 00:01:53,069 We gotcha cold. 53 00:01:53,154 --> 00:01:55,824 [scoffs] Guess he's gonna go down with the garbage, huh? 54 00:01:55,907 --> 00:01:59,077 Eh! The military mind is a mystery to me. 55 00:01:59,160 --> 00:02:00,200 You ready? 56 00:02:00,286 --> 00:02:01,496 I'm ready. 57 00:02:01,579 --> 00:02:03,999 Aha! Gotcha, general! 58 00:02:04,082 --> 00:02:06,632 Don't move, Uncle Bob! 59 00:02:06,876 --> 00:02:09,296 [yelping] 60 00:02:09,379 --> 00:02:12,219 That's-- that's impossible. 61 00:02:12,298 --> 00:02:13,798 [P.J.] How'd he do that? 62 00:02:16,052 --> 00:02:20,682 Ha ha! Surprise is my middle name! 63 00:02:22,100 --> 00:02:23,520 Come on, Peejster! 64 00:02:23,601 --> 00:02:26,401 We have not yet begun to squirt. 65 00:02:26,479 --> 00:02:28,769 [man on TV] This 4th of July, come on down. 66 00:02:28,857 --> 00:02:32,437 Get a super deal on a patriotic RV from me, Earl Yokel. 67 00:02:32,527 --> 00:02:37,527 [munching] Earl Yokel? Yokel Earl, you mean. 68 00:02:37,615 --> 00:02:40,405 You can't get a better deal in Spoonerville, 69 00:02:40,493 --> 00:02:43,713 especially from a certain RV pirate 70 00:02:43,788 --> 00:02:46,368 whose initial is "p" as in porky. 71 00:02:46,458 --> 00:02:47,878 What? 72 00:02:47,959 --> 00:02:48,959 "P"? 73 00:02:49,044 --> 00:02:50,094 Why, that's me! 74 00:02:50,170 --> 00:02:52,420 Who you calling porky, bird face? 75 00:02:52,505 --> 00:02:54,085 And if he's watching 76 00:02:54,174 --> 00:02:56,594 and can stop chewing long enough to listen, 77 00:02:56,676 --> 00:02:59,176 I challenge him to outsell me, 78 00:02:59,262 --> 00:03:00,812 Earl "Uncle Sam" Yokel, 79 00:03:00,889 --> 00:03:04,559 during my 4th of July red, white, and blue tag sale. 80 00:03:04,642 --> 00:03:06,062 [woman] I want one! 81 00:03:06,144 --> 00:03:07,604 [people chattering] What a great deal! 82 00:03:07,687 --> 00:03:09,687 This means war! 83 00:03:09,773 --> 00:03:12,193 I've gotta develop a gimmick 84 00:03:12,275 --> 00:03:13,855 to outsell that loudmouth. 85 00:03:13,943 --> 00:03:15,863 First I'll figure out a way 86 00:03:15,945 --> 00:03:18,815 to get the air out of his tires. 87 00:03:18,907 --> 00:03:19,947 [P.J.] Move it, Max! 88 00:03:20,033 --> 00:03:21,533 [Max] Right behind you, bud. 89 00:03:24,412 --> 00:03:26,712 Hey! What do you think you're doing? 90 00:03:26,790 --> 00:03:29,790 Uncle Bob's teaching us commando tactics. 91 00:03:29,876 --> 00:03:32,246 The guy's amazing. He could be anywhere! 92 00:03:32,337 --> 00:03:34,087 That old blowhard? 93 00:03:34,172 --> 00:03:37,552 Why, he couldn't commando my big toe! 94 00:03:37,634 --> 00:03:38,514 [blows raspberry] 95 00:03:38,593 --> 00:03:40,263 It's him. 96 00:03:40,345 --> 00:03:41,255 Let 'em have it! 97 00:03:41,346 --> 00:03:43,466 Let who have what? 98 00:03:47,811 --> 00:03:49,601 Don't move, general. 99 00:03:49,688 --> 00:03:51,608 I gotcha, Uncle Bob. 100 00:03:51,690 --> 00:03:54,230 Hold on just a second there. 101 00:03:54,317 --> 00:03:57,777 It ain't over till it's over, rookies! 102 00:04:00,281 --> 00:04:02,121 Stop it! 103 00:04:02,200 --> 00:04:05,040 He who squirts and runs away 104 00:04:05,120 --> 00:04:08,120 lives to squirt another day. 105 00:04:08,206 --> 00:04:09,536 After him! 106 00:04:09,624 --> 00:04:11,044 Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! 107 00:04:12,210 --> 00:04:14,170 When I get my hands on those kids-- 108 00:04:14,254 --> 00:04:15,304 I'm gonna-- Uh? 109 00:04:15,380 --> 00:04:17,340 Where do we think we're going? 110 00:04:17,424 --> 00:04:21,184 Why, pumpkin nut, we-- I mean, you-- 111 00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:23,181 I was just-- 112 00:04:23,263 --> 00:04:25,683 Redecorating to surprise Mommy? 113 00:04:25,765 --> 00:04:29,555 [Pete] Uh, well, not exactly, sardine lips, 114 00:04:29,644 --> 00:04:31,024 see, I was just-- 115 00:04:31,104 --> 00:04:32,734 You really want to surprise Mommy, 116 00:04:32,814 --> 00:04:34,444 you'll clean up, now! 117 00:04:34,524 --> 00:04:36,904 But, Pegster, I didn't do it. 118 00:04:36,985 --> 00:04:38,945 It was your uncle-- 119 00:04:39,029 --> 00:04:41,949 Easy. That's my favorite ear. 120 00:04:42,032 --> 00:04:44,492 You just leave my sweet uncle Bob alone! 121 00:04:44,784 --> 00:04:50,084 It isn't easy for Brigadier General Robert E. Lee Sparrowhawk to retire. 122 00:04:50,165 --> 00:04:53,535 He's acting a little strange 'cause he's feeling useless. 123 00:04:53,626 --> 00:04:55,046 But he has a good heart. 124 00:04:55,128 --> 00:04:57,628 It's his head I'm worried about. 125 00:04:57,714 --> 00:04:59,304 Did you say something? 126 00:04:59,382 --> 00:05:01,932 I was just saying he wasn't alone 127 00:05:02,010 --> 00:05:05,260 because P.J. and young goof-- 128 00:05:05,305 --> 00:05:07,675 Yes. The kids just love him, don't they? 129 00:05:07,766 --> 00:05:09,766 Don't forget to dust my knickknacks. 130 00:05:11,311 --> 00:05:13,561 But-- But I got work to do. 131 00:05:13,646 --> 00:05:16,896 Earl Yokel's commercials are killing my business. 132 00:05:16,983 --> 00:05:18,743 I'll have to go to war. 133 00:05:18,818 --> 00:05:21,568 Why, Pete, my little hot-glue gun, 134 00:05:21,654 --> 00:05:23,874 that's so thoughtful of you. 135 00:05:23,948 --> 00:05:26,078 It... is? 136 00:05:26,159 --> 00:05:28,119 Uncle Bob will be a big help 137 00:05:28,203 --> 00:05:30,793 planning your ad campaign with you. 138 00:05:30,872 --> 00:05:35,382 Uncle Bob? Helping me sell RVs? 139 00:05:37,253 --> 00:05:41,013 It isn't like you to have such a good idea. [laughs] 140 00:05:41,091 --> 00:05:43,391 I can't wait to tell Uncle Bob. 141 00:05:43,468 --> 00:05:45,848 Uh, let me tell him, Peg! 142 00:05:45,929 --> 00:05:50,059 I, uh, I wanna see his face light up with joy. 143 00:05:50,141 --> 00:05:52,021 Why, of course, Pete. 144 00:05:52,102 --> 00:05:53,902 Never mind cleaning up. 145 00:05:53,978 --> 00:05:57,938 Oh! I'm so excited about this! 146 00:05:58,024 --> 00:06:01,114 Long as that pinhead uncle of hers is around, 147 00:06:01,194 --> 00:06:02,574 I'm not going to get anything done. 148 00:06:04,864 --> 00:06:07,744 How do you get rid of a guy 149 00:06:07,826 --> 00:06:10,326 who only takes orders from the US Army? 150 00:06:10,412 --> 00:06:15,582 Yeah! That's it! Orders from the army. 151 00:06:21,798 --> 00:06:23,758 [Goofy] Hmm. Let's see here. 152 00:06:23,842 --> 00:06:25,892 Instructions in Spanish, German, 153 00:06:25,969 --> 00:06:28,469 French, Dutch, Italian... 154 00:06:28,596 --> 00:06:30,386 Ah! Here we go! 155 00:06:30,473 --> 00:06:32,143 Instructions in English! 156 00:06:32,225 --> 00:06:34,345 [chuckles] These oughta do it. 157 00:06:34,436 --> 00:06:36,596 [narrator] Plumbing in the home. 158 00:06:36,688 --> 00:06:39,648 Chapter one-- the kitchen sink. 159 00:06:39,733 --> 00:06:43,363 Nothing is easier than disconnecting the kitchen sink 160 00:06:43,445 --> 00:06:46,525 for its annual cleaning and inspection. 161 00:06:46,614 --> 00:06:48,534 I love this stuff! 162 00:06:48,616 --> 00:06:50,946 First, select your pipe wrench. 163 00:06:51,036 --> 00:06:53,616 I said pipe wrench! 164 00:06:53,705 --> 00:06:56,285 [Goofy] Oh! Silly ol' me! 165 00:06:56,374 --> 00:06:59,174 [narrator] Now unscrew the p-trapfrom the tail piece 166 00:06:59,252 --> 00:07:00,632 while untwisting the y-joint 167 00:07:00,712 --> 00:07:02,092 playing tea for two 168 00:07:02,172 --> 00:07:04,092 on the left-hand threaded elbow. 169 00:07:04,174 --> 00:07:08,014 [Goofy laughs] This is a cinch. Uh-oh. 170 00:07:08,094 --> 00:07:10,014 But whatever you do, 171 00:07:10,096 --> 00:07:13,516 don't forget to shut off the water! 172 00:07:13,975 --> 00:07:16,185 [screaming] 173 00:07:17,937 --> 00:07:20,227 Gosh, General Sparrowhawk, 174 00:07:20,315 --> 00:07:21,685 you're really something. 175 00:07:21,775 --> 00:07:24,025 Thank you, Max. 176 00:07:24,110 --> 00:07:25,360 Call me Bob. 177 00:07:25,445 --> 00:07:28,025 And you're right. I really am something. 178 00:07:28,114 --> 00:07:32,834 Man, I don't know why the army let you retire. 179 00:07:32,911 --> 00:07:34,791 Yeah! What a waste! 180 00:07:34,871 --> 00:07:36,411 You're awesome! 181 00:07:36,498 --> 00:07:38,288 The way I figure it, 182 00:07:38,375 --> 00:07:40,495 I'm being held in reserve 183 00:07:40,585 --> 00:07:43,245 for something really special. 184 00:07:43,338 --> 00:07:44,418 I must be. 185 00:07:44,506 --> 00:07:46,126 Get away from me! 186 00:07:46,216 --> 00:07:48,296 Am-scray! Beat it! 187 00:07:48,385 --> 00:07:49,675 I stand still for a second, 188 00:07:49,761 --> 00:07:51,851 and those vultures are all over me. 189 00:07:51,930 --> 00:07:53,180 I can't stand it! 190 00:07:53,264 --> 00:07:55,104 Now where was I? 191 00:07:55,183 --> 00:07:59,193 Tellin' us why the army was savin' you. for something special. 192 00:07:59,270 --> 00:08:01,520 I'll tell you why, son. 193 00:08:01,606 --> 00:08:04,186 Because in all my years in the military, 194 00:08:04,776 --> 00:08:08,526 nothing and nobody has ever taken me by surprise. 195 00:08:08,613 --> 00:08:11,873 Wow! Nobody's ever surprised you? 196 00:08:11,950 --> 00:08:13,030 Never. 197 00:08:13,118 --> 00:08:16,118 The man who finally does, if he exists, 198 00:08:16,204 --> 00:08:19,424 is gonna have to be someone very special. 199 00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:21,289 [Goofy screaming] 200 00:08:22,585 --> 00:08:25,585 Sorry, officer. I shoulda watched 201 00:08:25,672 --> 00:08:27,172 which way I was being blasted. 202 00:08:27,257 --> 00:08:29,297 Don't apologize, man! 203 00:08:29,384 --> 00:08:31,394 You were incredible. 204 00:08:31,469 --> 00:08:32,719 I never thought I'd see the day 205 00:08:32,804 --> 00:08:35,564 I'd have my socks knocked off like that. 206 00:08:35,640 --> 00:08:37,140 It was thrilling. 207 00:08:37,225 --> 00:08:40,435 You and I are gonna be buddies. 208 00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:43,610 But first, I have to get out of this soggy uniform. 209 00:08:43,690 --> 00:08:45,230 I hate wet underwear. 210 00:08:45,316 --> 00:08:46,566 Who was that guy? 211 00:08:46,651 --> 00:08:48,151 My uncle! 212 00:08:48,236 --> 00:08:52,116 Brigadier General Robert E. Lee Sparrowhawk, 213 00:08:52,198 --> 00:08:53,488 retired. 214 00:08:53,575 --> 00:08:55,655 I can believe it. 215 00:08:55,744 --> 00:08:58,004 I'm purty pooped myself. 216 00:09:03,001 --> 00:09:04,001 [whistles] 217 00:09:05,587 --> 00:09:06,877 Halt! Who goes there? 218 00:09:08,256 --> 00:09:10,836 Who in camouflage's name are you? 219 00:09:10,925 --> 00:09:13,255 [Pete] Don't you recognize military intelligence 220 00:09:13,345 --> 00:09:14,545 when you see it? 221 00:09:14,596 --> 00:09:15,966 If I could do that, 222 00:09:16,056 --> 00:09:17,516 I'd be a genius, not a general. 223 00:09:17,599 --> 00:09:18,729 What do you want? 224 00:09:18,808 --> 00:09:21,308 I have a message for you from them. 225 00:09:21,394 --> 00:09:23,564 Wait a minute! What's the password? 226 00:09:23,646 --> 00:09:27,526 Uh, them didn't tell it to me. 227 00:09:27,609 --> 00:09:29,319 It was too secret. 228 00:09:29,402 --> 00:09:32,072 Exactly. They wouldn't tell it to me, either. 229 00:09:32,155 --> 00:09:34,315 I love tight security. 230 00:09:34,407 --> 00:09:36,077 Now what's the message? 231 00:09:36,159 --> 00:09:38,239 [Pete] There's gonna be a national emergency. 232 00:09:38,328 --> 00:09:40,208 They need you to handle it. 233 00:09:40,997 --> 00:09:44,747 I knew they were saving me for something special! 234 00:09:44,834 --> 00:09:46,754 I just knew it. Didn't you? 235 00:09:46,836 --> 00:09:49,586 What kind of emergency we talking about here? 236 00:09:49,673 --> 00:09:52,183 They say you'll know it when you see it. 237 00:09:52,258 --> 00:09:55,098 Of course I will. I'm a trained soldier, you know? 238 00:09:55,178 --> 00:10:00,808 You'll have to organize a base far from me-- I mean, here. 239 00:10:00,892 --> 00:10:02,642 What about extra troops? 240 00:10:02,727 --> 00:10:04,397 Use your own judgment. 241 00:10:04,479 --> 00:10:06,979 Wonderful! My very own judgment. 242 00:10:07,065 --> 00:10:09,145 I've discovered just the man I need 243 00:10:09,234 --> 00:10:11,614 right here-- a natural soldier, 244 00:10:11,695 --> 00:10:14,065 gave me the thrill of a lifetime. 245 00:10:14,155 --> 00:10:16,025 [Pete] Ain't that somethin'? 246 00:10:16,116 --> 00:10:19,446 You can count on Brigadier General Bob Sparrowhawk. 247 00:10:19,536 --> 00:10:22,246 Roger, Wilco, and KP! 248 00:10:24,082 --> 00:10:27,502 Now that general moonbeam is out of my face, 249 00:10:27,585 --> 00:10:30,255 I got a sales campaign to plan. 250 00:10:30,338 --> 00:10:31,918 Generals aren't the only ones 251 00:10:32,007 --> 00:10:33,427 who know how to stratify. 252 00:10:33,508 --> 00:10:35,758 Wait! Just a second, though, here. 253 00:10:35,844 --> 00:10:38,724 Fourth of July, generals, campaigns. 254 00:10:38,805 --> 00:10:42,555 I got it! Wait till that 4th of July jerk Earl Yokel sees 255 00:10:42,642 --> 00:10:44,272 what he's up against now! 256 00:10:44,352 --> 00:10:46,152 [laughs menacingly] 257 00:10:51,026 --> 00:10:53,026 [Goofy] Doesn't look quite right somehow. 258 00:10:53,111 --> 00:10:56,361 Maybe I misread the instructions. [sighs] 259 00:10:56,448 --> 00:10:59,278 They're all Greek to me, even the ones in English. 260 00:10:59,367 --> 00:11:01,787 [chuckles] Sure could use a hand with these. 261 00:11:01,870 --> 00:11:03,710 [Bob] Psst! Hey, you! Soldier! 262 00:11:03,788 --> 00:11:06,078 Gawrsh! 263 00:11:06,166 --> 00:11:07,996 Not quite what I had in mind. 264 00:11:08,084 --> 00:11:10,214 No! No! Down here! 265 00:11:10,295 --> 00:11:12,165 Oh, hiya, general. 266 00:11:12,255 --> 00:11:13,415 You lost or something? 267 00:11:13,506 --> 00:11:15,006 Whoa! 268 00:11:15,091 --> 00:11:16,261 [Bob] Are we alone? 269 00:11:16,343 --> 00:11:17,803 [Goofy] I can't tell, general. 270 00:11:18,011 --> 00:11:22,391 It's too dark to see. Hey! [mumbling] 271 00:11:23,141 --> 00:11:25,731 [screaming] 272 00:11:27,687 --> 00:11:28,727 [sighs] 273 00:11:28,813 --> 00:11:30,153 Private Goofy? 274 00:11:30,231 --> 00:11:31,401 Ah-hyuck! That's me. 275 00:11:31,483 --> 00:11:33,493 Uncle Bob wants you. 276 00:11:33,568 --> 00:11:37,528 This could be the moment you'll look back on with pride for the rest of your life. 277 00:11:37,614 --> 00:11:39,034 What have you got to say? 278 00:11:39,115 --> 00:11:42,785 [Goofy] I think I forgot to turn the water off again. 279 00:11:42,869 --> 00:11:44,869 [screams] 280 00:11:45,246 --> 00:11:47,616 [Pete] I was there. 281 00:11:47,707 --> 00:11:50,997 When Neanderthal man first traded a stone wheel 282 00:11:51,086 --> 00:11:53,166 for a pork chop, 283 00:11:53,254 --> 00:11:54,764 I was there. 284 00:11:54,839 --> 00:11:56,929 When the first RV salesman 285 00:11:57,008 --> 00:12:01,098 sold a covered wagon with a leaky top 286 00:12:01,179 --> 00:12:02,809 and no warranty, 287 00:12:02,889 --> 00:12:04,389 I was there. 288 00:12:04,474 --> 00:12:07,144 And when Earl Yokel learns the hard way 289 00:12:07,227 --> 00:12:12,817 what a 4th of July RV sale is all about-- 290 00:12:12,899 --> 00:12:14,319 ha ha ha-- 291 00:12:14,401 --> 00:12:16,321 I'll be there, too. 292 00:12:16,403 --> 00:12:19,743 Now all I need is my tank. 293 00:12:19,823 --> 00:12:22,033 Nothin' like a little patriotism 294 00:12:22,117 --> 00:12:26,827 and an 88-millimetre cannon to promote RV sales. 295 00:12:26,913 --> 00:12:30,213 Nice of ya to bring the boys. 296 00:12:30,291 --> 00:12:32,791 I always say, give me a man when he's a boy, 297 00:12:32,877 --> 00:12:33,997 and when he's an old codger, 298 00:12:34,087 --> 00:12:37,717 the teenager will not forget the youth when he isn't an infant anymore. 299 00:12:37,799 --> 00:12:42,719 Wow, if I'd said that, my tongue would be numbly. 300 00:12:42,804 --> 00:12:44,764 Exactly where are we goin'? 301 00:12:44,848 --> 00:12:46,678 Yeah, and what are we gonna do? 302 00:12:46,766 --> 00:12:51,306 I can't tell you that now. Suffice to say the world will be a better place 303 00:12:51,396 --> 00:12:52,356 when we're through. 304 00:12:52,439 --> 00:12:53,729 Radical! 305 00:12:53,815 --> 00:12:56,145 We're gonna hug trees. 306 00:12:56,234 --> 00:12:57,494 Cool! 307 00:12:57,569 --> 00:12:59,319 [Bob] Here we are! 308 00:12:59,404 --> 00:13:00,534 [tires screech] 309 00:13:01,156 --> 00:13:03,906 Welcome to the Spoonerville County Militia Armory 310 00:13:03,992 --> 00:13:06,242 and surplus depot. 311 00:13:06,327 --> 00:13:08,747 [Max/P.J.] Awesome! 312 00:13:08,830 --> 00:13:11,330 I have the honor and privilege of preparin' you 313 00:13:11,416 --> 00:13:13,496 for the oncoming emergency. 314 00:13:13,585 --> 00:13:14,955 Wow! An emergency! 315 00:13:15,045 --> 00:13:16,665 Right on! 316 00:13:16,755 --> 00:13:18,165 Yeah. Ah-hyuck! 317 00:13:18,256 --> 00:13:19,916 Exactly what kind of emergency 318 00:13:20,008 --> 00:13:21,928 are we talking about again? 319 00:13:22,010 --> 00:13:23,760 Don't you worry about that. 320 00:13:23,845 --> 00:13:27,465 I'll know it when I see it. I'm a trained soldier. 321 00:13:27,557 --> 00:13:30,637 I can't wait to see him in action. 322 00:13:30,727 --> 00:13:32,147 And us in action, dude! 323 00:13:32,228 --> 00:13:33,398 [both] Yeah! 324 00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:35,900 The first thing you have to learn is the basics 325 00:13:35,982 --> 00:13:37,612 from the army manual, 326 00:13:37,692 --> 00:13:40,452 then we'll move on to advanced training. 327 00:13:40,528 --> 00:13:42,488 [narrator] Yes, it's true! 328 00:13:42,572 --> 00:13:44,372 You're in the army now! 329 00:13:44,491 --> 00:13:46,911 [chuckles] There's that voice again. 330 00:13:46,993 --> 00:13:49,453 Chapter one-- the obstacle course. 331 00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:51,830 Military efficiency is based 332 00:13:51,915 --> 00:13:54,205 on rigorous physical training. 333 00:13:54,292 --> 00:13:57,632 Overcoming physical challenges takes speed, 334 00:13:57,712 --> 00:13:59,882 strength, and stamina. 335 00:13:59,964 --> 00:14:03,344 Of course, looking where you're going helps, too. 336 00:14:06,596 --> 00:14:09,676 Only the finely-tuned body can bring to bear 337 00:14:09,766 --> 00:14:13,306 that oh, so important quality of agility! 338 00:14:13,395 --> 00:14:15,935 The long-awaited opportunity 339 00:14:16,022 --> 00:14:18,982 for our citizen soldier to bring all his effort 340 00:14:19,067 --> 00:14:23,277 to bear on the accomplishment of one mighty quest, 341 00:14:23,363 --> 00:14:25,953 surging spectacularly to the heights 342 00:14:26,032 --> 00:14:27,872 of athletic prowess, 343 00:14:27,951 --> 00:14:29,371 which are utterly useless 344 00:14:29,452 --> 00:14:33,162 if the equipment hadn't been properly checked beforehand. 345 00:14:33,248 --> 00:14:35,038 [Goofy screaming] 346 00:14:45,051 --> 00:14:47,601 [narrator] Balance is another attribute 347 00:14:47,679 --> 00:14:49,929 demanded of military service. 348 00:14:51,016 --> 00:14:52,096 One never knows 349 00:14:52,183 --> 00:14:55,103 when a tiny, seemingly insignificant misstep 350 00:14:55,186 --> 00:14:59,146 could send a soldier catapulting to his doom. 351 00:14:59,232 --> 00:15:01,152 Too heavy [grunts] 352 00:15:01,234 --> 00:15:04,744 Successful balance requires nerves of steel, 353 00:15:04,821 --> 00:15:06,281 catlike reflexes, 354 00:15:06,364 --> 00:15:07,914 and a stern resolution 355 00:15:07,991 --> 00:15:11,751 never, ever to be caught off-guard. 356 00:15:12,620 --> 00:15:15,120 [Goofy screaming] 357 00:15:17,083 --> 00:15:20,593 [Pete] Oh, baby, come to Papa. 358 00:15:20,670 --> 00:15:22,760 A super V-8 with glass packs, 359 00:15:22,839 --> 00:15:26,509 double-charged carbs, 24-valve mean machine. 360 00:15:26,593 --> 00:15:28,603 You're gonna be fun during rush hour. 361 00:15:28,678 --> 00:15:31,218 And to think this honey is obsolete. 362 00:15:31,306 --> 00:15:33,516 It's you and me, sweetie. 363 00:15:34,517 --> 00:15:36,347 Nothin' and nobody's stopping me 364 00:15:36,436 --> 00:15:38,606 from making you a star 365 00:15:38,688 --> 00:15:41,148 and selling a lot of RVs. 366 00:15:41,232 --> 00:15:43,282 [Goofy screaming] 367 00:15:49,699 --> 00:15:51,199 Hiya, Petey. 368 00:15:51,284 --> 00:15:52,994 Ah-hyuck! Nice catch. 369 00:15:53,078 --> 00:15:55,868 Goof, what in the name of olive drab undies 370 00:15:55,955 --> 00:15:57,205 are you doin' here? 371 00:15:57,290 --> 00:15:59,630 [Bob] He's very good at surprisin' people. 372 00:15:59,709 --> 00:16:01,839 But the question is, 373 00:16:01,961 --> 00:16:04,051 what are you doin' here, nephew? 374 00:16:06,383 --> 00:16:08,723 Pete, why are you hanging around here dressed 375 00:16:08,802 --> 00:16:11,142 like a boy scout with delusions of grandeur? 376 00:16:11,221 --> 00:16:14,851 'Cause I need a tank for my sales campaign! 377 00:16:14,933 --> 00:16:17,483 A likely story. Why should I believe it? 378 00:16:17,602 --> 00:16:19,942 Because, Captain Kidd, 379 00:16:20,021 --> 00:16:22,821 you've believed everything else I've told you. 380 00:16:22,899 --> 00:16:24,779 What's your dad talking about? 381 00:16:24,859 --> 00:16:26,779 I'm his kid, not his interpreter. 382 00:16:26,861 --> 00:16:28,821 Well, I'll tell you what I'm talking about. 383 00:16:28,947 --> 00:16:33,077 Peg wanted me to make General Over-the-hill here feel useful, 384 00:16:33,159 --> 00:16:35,199 and it was driving me nutso! 385 00:16:36,329 --> 00:16:39,209 Not as long a drive as you might suppose. 386 00:16:39,499 --> 00:16:43,419 So I convinced old red, white, and blue-blood 387 00:16:43,503 --> 00:16:45,513 he was needed elsewhere. 388 00:16:45,588 --> 00:16:49,008 He thought I was from military intelligence. 389 00:16:49,092 --> 00:16:51,432 Now that's a pretty scary concept. 390 00:16:51,511 --> 00:16:54,061 You mean there's no emergency? 391 00:16:54,139 --> 00:16:56,469 You were the emergency, pal. 392 00:16:56,599 --> 00:16:58,269 And I solved you. 393 00:16:58,351 --> 00:17:00,311 Should have known you'd end up here 394 00:17:00,395 --> 00:17:02,305 with all the other obsolete hardware. 395 00:17:02,439 --> 00:17:07,359 Oh, sure. Where else can an old soldier go 396 00:17:07,444 --> 00:17:10,074 when an RV salesman makes him look like an idiot? 397 00:17:10,196 --> 00:17:12,066 -[Max] General, wait up! -[Pete] Uncle Bob! 398 00:17:12,198 --> 00:17:15,158 Kinda tough on the old guy, weren't you, Petey? 399 00:17:15,243 --> 00:17:17,293 He knows I was only funnin' him. 400 00:17:17,370 --> 00:17:20,250 Old warhorses are experts on foolin' around. 401 00:17:20,331 --> 00:17:21,921 Oh, I don't know, Petey. 402 00:17:22,042 --> 00:17:23,422 Never mind him, Goofster. 403 00:17:23,501 --> 00:17:25,631 Let's see if we can get this tank started. 404 00:17:30,258 --> 00:17:31,588 Talk to him. 405 00:17:31,718 --> 00:17:33,218 Why don't you talk to him? 406 00:17:33,303 --> 00:17:35,063 He's your uncle, bonehead. 407 00:17:35,138 --> 00:17:36,558 Oh, yeah. 408 00:17:37,682 --> 00:17:39,482 [stutters] Hi, Uncle Bob. 409 00:17:39,559 --> 00:17:41,189 Oh, boy! Brilliant! 410 00:17:41,269 --> 00:17:42,849 Wish I'd said that. 411 00:17:42,979 --> 00:17:45,899 Don't be so hard on him, Max. 412 00:17:45,982 --> 00:17:49,322 Nothing anyone can say can make the truth a lie. 413 00:17:49,402 --> 00:17:53,532 But you are a great soldier, aren't you, Uncle Bob? 414 00:17:53,656 --> 00:17:56,786 I guess I'm never gonna get the chance to find out. 415 00:17:58,912 --> 00:18:00,712 When are you gonna open this banner? 416 00:18:00,789 --> 00:18:02,369 [Pete] All in good time. 417 00:18:02,457 --> 00:18:05,037 First I gotta get this mama runnin'. 418 00:18:05,126 --> 00:18:08,416 But the manual says you gotta twist the doohickey-- 419 00:18:08,505 --> 00:18:11,005 I don't need any blankety-blank manual! 420 00:18:12,509 --> 00:18:13,969 [engine starts] 421 00:18:14,094 --> 00:18:15,764 What'd I tell you? 422 00:18:15,845 --> 00:18:19,015 Now it says you gotta be careful driving this thing. 423 00:18:19,140 --> 00:18:23,850 Oh, button up. A used-car salesman can drive anything with wheels on it. 424 00:18:23,978 --> 00:18:27,978 But, Petey, a tank hasn't got wheels. 425 00:18:28,108 --> 00:18:29,438 [Pete] Quiet, you goof! 426 00:18:29,567 --> 00:18:31,487 Can't you see I'm tryin' to steer? 427 00:18:33,947 --> 00:18:36,067 Petey! Stop! Help! 428 00:18:36,199 --> 00:18:39,289 I would if I could, but I can't! 429 00:18:40,870 --> 00:18:42,120 Whoa! 430 00:18:42,205 --> 00:18:43,745 Look out, Petey! 431 00:18:44,082 --> 00:18:46,252 Whoa! 432 00:18:46,376 --> 00:18:48,496 [Goofy] Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! 433 00:18:55,635 --> 00:18:59,175 Gawrsh! I'm lucky this tower was here. 434 00:18:59,264 --> 00:19:01,604 -[cracking] -Oopsie. 435 00:19:01,683 --> 00:19:04,353 What is goin' on around here? 436 00:19:04,436 --> 00:19:05,766 I don't know what's goin' on, 437 00:19:05,854 --> 00:19:07,614 but I know what's comin' down. 438 00:19:08,023 --> 00:19:10,033 Whoa, big feet! 439 00:19:10,108 --> 00:19:12,278 Fall back! 440 00:19:14,362 --> 00:19:15,992 Pop, are you OK? 441 00:19:16,072 --> 00:19:19,162 Sure. The ground broke my fall. 442 00:19:19,242 --> 00:19:21,082 You broke the tower, too. 443 00:19:21,202 --> 00:19:24,542 What is goin' on around here, Goof? 444 00:19:24,622 --> 00:19:25,792 [engine roar] 445 00:19:25,874 --> 00:19:27,254 That is. 446 00:19:32,047 --> 00:19:35,127 [Pete] Help! 447 00:19:35,216 --> 00:19:37,386 Pete's havin' a little trouble with his tank. 448 00:19:37,469 --> 00:19:38,849 That machine's a killer 449 00:19:38,928 --> 00:19:40,468 if you don't know what you're doing. 450 00:19:40,597 --> 00:19:42,467 You gotta do something! 451 00:19:42,557 --> 00:19:44,887 You're the only one who can save him! 452 00:19:48,021 --> 00:19:50,271 You kids call Peg and get home! 453 00:19:50,357 --> 00:19:52,317 Goofy and I have a job to do. 454 00:19:52,442 --> 00:19:56,702 Wow, P.J.! Your uncle's even braver than I thought. 455 00:19:57,238 --> 00:20:00,078 [Pete screaming] 456 00:20:00,867 --> 00:20:01,867 Help! 457 00:20:01,951 --> 00:20:03,541 [Goofy] Hang on, Petey boy. 458 00:20:03,620 --> 00:20:05,160 We're comin'! 459 00:20:05,288 --> 00:20:07,078 Faster, Goofy! Faster! 460 00:20:07,207 --> 00:20:08,577 Whatever you do, 461 00:20:08,667 --> 00:20:10,417 watch out for the potholes! 462 00:20:10,502 --> 00:20:12,342 Right! [gasps] 463 00:20:12,420 --> 00:20:14,130 Found one! Ah-hyuck! 464 00:20:14,214 --> 00:20:15,224 Whoa! 465 00:20:15,632 --> 00:20:18,182 [shouting] 466 00:20:18,510 --> 00:20:20,470 I hate this like the dickens. 467 00:20:23,890 --> 00:20:25,060 Uh-oh. 468 00:20:25,642 --> 00:20:26,812 You're a general. 469 00:20:26,893 --> 00:20:28,773 Order this thing to stop! 470 00:20:30,146 --> 00:20:31,016 Hmm. 471 00:20:31,106 --> 00:20:32,226 Steering's jammed. 472 00:20:32,565 --> 00:20:33,685 Brakes burned out. 473 00:20:34,067 --> 00:20:35,237 I know that! I know that! 474 00:20:35,318 --> 00:20:37,778 So we simply turn off the engine. 475 00:20:38,405 --> 00:20:41,775 Oh, yeah. The engine. I knew that. 476 00:20:43,618 --> 00:20:45,698 [all] Whoa! 477 00:20:45,829 --> 00:20:49,869 So what does the manual say now, Mr. Brass hat? 478 00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:53,210 The manual doesn't cover this particular situation. 479 00:20:53,294 --> 00:20:54,844 I shoulda known. 480 00:20:54,963 --> 00:20:57,423 But a trained soldier knows exactly what to do. 481 00:20:57,757 --> 00:20:59,427 No. No. You'll smoosh us! 482 00:20:59,509 --> 00:21:01,089 Hold it, Pete. 483 00:21:01,177 --> 00:21:03,097 Uncle Bob knows what he's doing. 484 00:21:04,097 --> 00:21:07,767 [all shouting] 485 00:21:11,688 --> 00:21:13,398 This little dollar went to market. 486 00:21:13,481 --> 00:21:15,861 This little dollar stayed home. 487 00:21:15,942 --> 00:21:16,782 [man] Look! Up in the sky! 488 00:21:16,860 --> 00:21:17,940 [man 2] It's a bird! 489 00:21:18,028 --> 00:21:19,028 [man 3] It's a plane! 490 00:21:19,112 --> 00:21:21,202 [man 4] It's Porky Pete. He's flyin' a tank! 491 00:21:21,281 --> 00:21:22,411 [man 5] I want an RV from that guy. 492 00:21:22,532 --> 00:21:25,832 Wait! Don't go! We can make a deal. Hey! 493 00:21:25,910 --> 00:21:27,330 [whining] 494 00:21:34,044 --> 00:21:35,964 Nice shot, Uncle Bob. 495 00:21:36,087 --> 00:21:38,257 Piece of cake for a trained soldier. 496 00:21:38,340 --> 00:21:41,470 "Nice shot, Uncle Bob." Nice shot? 497 00:21:41,551 --> 00:21:44,141 Not only did he almost kill us, 498 00:21:44,220 --> 00:21:45,760 he wrecked my business. 499 00:21:45,847 --> 00:21:47,177 Pete! Pete! Pete! 500 00:21:47,307 --> 00:21:48,677 [crowd chanting] Pete! Pete! Pete! 501 00:21:48,808 --> 00:21:50,098 Pete! Pete! Pete! 502 00:21:50,226 --> 00:21:51,266 Pete! Pete! Pete! 503 00:21:51,394 --> 00:21:52,694 Looks to me 504 00:21:52,812 --> 00:21:55,022 like the general's not only saved you, 505 00:21:55,148 --> 00:21:56,018 he's saved your business. 506 00:21:56,149 --> 00:21:57,729 Huh? 507 00:21:57,817 --> 00:22:01,647 Uh, general, what can I say? 508 00:22:01,821 --> 00:22:03,911 Just call me Uncle Bob. 509 00:22:03,990 --> 00:22:07,040 You were right, Goof! This guy really sells. 510 00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:09,450 Well, you know what they say: 511 00:22:09,788 --> 00:22:11,918 "Old soldiers never buy, 512 00:22:11,998 --> 00:22:14,918 but they sure can trade away." Ah-hyuck! 513 00:22:17,212 --> 00:22:18,632 ♪ Gimme a beat ♪ 514 00:22:45,365 --> 00:22:46,485 Yeah!