1 00:00:01,166 --> 00:00:03,016 Everything is fine, Vivian. 2 00:00:03,036 --> 00:00:06,078 Tell Ashley and Nicky that I miss them too. 3 00:00:06,099 --> 00:00:08,080 Okay? Okay. Love you. 4 00:00:08,099 --> 00:00:10,079 Oh, kiss your sister for me. 5 00:00:11,151 --> 00:00:13,122 God knows I wouldn't do it. 6 00:00:14,112 --> 00:00:16,092 - Morning. - Morning. 7 00:00:16,113 --> 00:00:18,124 Well, daddy, L.A.'s favorite weather girl 8 00:00:18,143 --> 00:00:20,005 is ready to go back to work. 9 00:00:20,026 --> 00:00:21,066 With that on? 10 00:00:21,085 --> 00:00:23,076 Oh, I know, I'm tired of black too 11 00:00:23,097 --> 00:00:24,137 but I want the public to know 12 00:00:24,157 --> 00:00:26,139 I'm still mourning Trevor's death. 13 00:00:26,159 --> 00:00:28,059 Well, you know, I just don't think that 14 00:00:28,078 --> 00:00:30,179 black is the right color for this kind of heat. 15 00:00:30,199 --> 00:00:33,200 Oh, don't worry, daddy, this dress is surprisingly cool. 16 00:00:33,220 --> 00:00:36,042 It's like I'm wearing practically nothing. 17 00:00:38,233 --> 00:00:40,203 She's not my daughter. 18 00:00:40,223 --> 00:00:42,185 [theme song] 19 00:00:42,206 --> 00:00:44,047 ♪ Now this is a story ♪ 20 00:00:44,067 --> 00:00:45,197 ♪ All about how my life ♪ 21 00:00:45,217 --> 00:00:47,099 ♪ Got flipped turned upside down ♪ 22 00:00:47,118 --> 00:00:49,198 ♪ And I'd like to take a minute just sit right there ♪ 23 00:00:49,219 --> 00:00:51,170 ♪ I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town ♪ 24 00:00:51,189 --> 00:00:53,120 ♪ Called Bel-Air ♪ 25 00:01:01,184 --> 00:01:04,046 ♪ In west Philadelphia born and raised ♪ 26 00:01:04,065 --> 00:01:06,236 ♪ On the playground is where I spent most of my days ♪ 27 00:01:07,017 --> 00:01:08,228 ♪ Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool ♪ 28 00:01:08,248 --> 00:01:11,090 ♪ And all shootin' some b-ball outside of the school ♪ 29 00:01:11,110 --> 00:01:14,030 ♪ When a couple of guys who were up to no good ♪ 30 00:01:14,050 --> 00:01:15,251 ♪ Started makin' trouble in my neighborhood ♪ 31 00:01:16,032 --> 00:01:18,133 ♪ I got in one little fight and my mom got scared ♪ 32 00:01:18,152 --> 00:01:19,172 ♪ And said you're moving with your auntie ♪ 33 00:01:19,193 --> 00:01:21,054 ♪ And uncle in Bel-Air ♪ 34 00:01:21,073 --> 00:01:22,183 ♪ I whistled for a cab and when it came ♪ 35 00:01:22,204 --> 00:01:24,056 ♪ Near the license plate said fresh ♪ 36 00:01:24,075 --> 00:01:25,205 ♪ And it had dice in the mirror ♪ 37 00:01:25,226 --> 00:01:27,217 ♪ If anything I can say that this cab was rare ♪ 38 00:01:27,237 --> 00:01:31,249 ♪ But I thought nah forget it yo homes to Bel-Air ♪ 39 00:01:32,029 --> 00:01:34,200 ♪ I pulled up to a house about seven or eight ♪ 40 00:01:34,219 --> 00:01:37,161 ♪ And I yelled to the cabbie, yo homes smell you later ♪ 41 00:01:37,182 --> 00:01:40,033 ♪ I looked at my kingdom, I was finally there ♪ 42 00:01:40,053 --> 00:01:42,244 ♪ To sit on my throne as the prince of Bel-Air ♪♪ 43 00:01:49,266 --> 00:01:51,247 [instrumental music] 44 00:01:55,100 --> 00:01:57,091 Dad, when are you gonna get the air conditioner fixed? 45 00:01:57,110 --> 00:01:59,101 It's sweltering in our place. 46 00:01:59,121 --> 00:02:03,183 Yeah, man, it's so hot out there the Uh-Huh Girls just went, Uh! 47 00:02:04,244 --> 00:02:07,276 Boy, everybody keeps talking about this heat wave. 48 00:02:08,055 --> 00:02:10,226 Maybe I should mention it in today's weather report. 49 00:02:15,249 --> 00:02:19,170 You know, that girl has got the mind of Willard Scott. 50 00:02:19,190 --> 00:02:21,082 Hey, come to think of it, you got his body. 51 00:02:21,103 --> 00:02:22,153 Y'all should team up. 52 00:02:23,252 --> 00:02:25,143 No, no check it out, on the serious tip, uncle Phil 53 00:02:25,164 --> 00:02:27,216 you-you got to fix our air conditioner today. 54 00:02:27,236 --> 00:02:29,136 And we got some people coming over for a party. 55 00:02:29,155 --> 00:02:32,286 And as good hosts, we'd prefer that they didn't melt. 56 00:02:33,068 --> 00:02:35,118 Sorry, Uncle Phil has left the building. 57 00:02:35,138 --> 00:02:37,099 You're now talking to landlord Banks 58 00:02:37,120 --> 00:02:40,161 and he's not fixing anything until he gets his rent. 59 00:02:41,221 --> 00:02:43,262 You'll get the rent when we get the air. 60 00:02:49,126 --> 00:02:51,147 What did you say? 61 00:02:51,166 --> 00:02:54,106 I'm sorry, was I talking out loud? 62 00:02:58,149 --> 00:02:59,229 You know what, Uncle Phil? 63 00:02:59,250 --> 00:03:01,161 Forget it, you win. 64 00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:03,173 We'll just have to move our little somethin'-somethin' 65 00:03:03,193 --> 00:03:05,243 from inside to poolside. 66 00:03:05,262 --> 00:03:07,123 (Phil) 'Oh, no, you don't.' 67 00:03:07,143 --> 00:03:11,125 No rent, no pool, no party, no nothing. 68 00:03:11,145 --> 00:03:14,176 What does he mean by "No nothing?" 69 00:03:14,197 --> 00:03:16,089 Oh, don't worry about it, it's a double negative. 70 00:03:16,109 --> 00:03:17,239 [whispering] 71 00:03:22,150 --> 00:03:25,202 - Wh-what's this? - A bill for your breakfast. 72 00:03:26,282 --> 00:03:30,153 Dad, this is an outrage! Three dollars for orange juice? 73 00:03:30,174 --> 00:03:35,117 Oh, and I've taken the liberty of adding a 15-percent gratuity. 74 00:03:37,148 --> 00:03:40,180 Carlton, of course you know, this means war! 75 00:03:40,200 --> 00:03:44,121 It certainly does. And we're gonna win, right, dad? 76 00:03:50,304 --> 00:03:53,316 [instrumental music] 77 00:03:55,147 --> 00:03:58,158 [indistinct chatter] 78 00:04:00,119 --> 00:04:01,250 Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa! 79 00:04:03,310 --> 00:04:05,101 Girl, let me tell you 80 00:04:05,121 --> 00:04:06,172 switching this to a pool party 81 00:04:06,192 --> 00:04:08,133 was a stroke of genius. 82 00:04:08,153 --> 00:04:09,203 Why do you say that? 83 00:04:10,164 --> 00:04:12,234 Oh, couple of reasons. 84 00:04:14,186 --> 00:04:16,187 Girl, I got to tell you 85 00:04:16,207 --> 00:04:19,168 that suit look like a piece of Good God 86 00:04:19,187 --> 00:04:20,267 wrapped up in some have mercy 87 00:04:20,288 --> 00:04:23,130 with a side of mmm. 88 00:04:23,150 --> 00:04:26,211 Really? I mean, you don't think it's too revealing? 89 00:04:26,231 --> 00:04:28,213 Well, if it is, your secret's safe with me. 90 00:04:28,233 --> 00:04:31,143 You know? You know? Come on, let's get out of this heat 91 00:04:31,163 --> 00:04:32,194 before I pop something, you know. 92 00:04:32,214 --> 00:04:33,274 Come on. 93 00:04:33,294 --> 00:04:35,266 Thank you, Chet. It's good to be back. 94 00:04:35,286 --> 00:04:38,187 Yes, I'm here at the Farmers Market, and as you can see 95 00:04:38,207 --> 00:04:40,248 my fans haven't forgotten me. 96 00:04:40,267 --> 00:04:43,209 Why haven't you answered any of my letters? 97 00:04:44,340 --> 00:04:48,161 Well, the good news is the heat wave is over. 98 00:04:48,181 --> 00:04:50,283 LA will have a high tomorrow of only 65. 99 00:04:50,303 --> 00:04:52,133 [all cheering] 100 00:04:52,152 --> 00:04:54,313 Oh, sorry, that "LA" stands for Louisiana. 101 00:04:54,333 --> 00:04:56,334 Our high will be a 112. 102 00:04:56,355 --> 00:04:58,156 (all) Oh! 103 00:04:58,176 --> 00:05:00,267 Well, they have the same abbreviation. 104 00:05:00,287 --> 00:05:02,178 This is Hilary Banks surrounded by 105 00:05:02,197 --> 00:05:04,339 ordinary people at the Farmers Market. 106 00:05:04,360 --> 00:05:06,260 Now back to you, Chet. 107 00:05:07,259 --> 00:05:09,140 Don't any of you touch me. 108 00:05:10,362 --> 00:05:12,343 I can't believe she wore that dress. 109 00:05:12,363 --> 00:05:14,334 Would you like a Swedish meatball, sir? 110 00:05:14,354 --> 00:05:16,284 Uh, don't mind if I do. 111 00:05:16,305 --> 00:05:18,346 Ah! Ah! Only one, sir. 112 00:05:18,366 --> 00:05:22,348 The rest are for Master William and his friends, poolside. 113 00:05:22,368 --> 00:05:27,190 What? I can't believe that he would deliberately disobey me! 114 00:05:27,209 --> 00:05:29,240 I wouldn't call it disobedience, sir. 115 00:05:29,261 --> 00:05:33,323 It's more like, outright defiance. 116 00:05:33,342 --> 00:05:35,353 That's it! 117 00:05:39,186 --> 00:05:42,167 Dance puppets, dance! 118 00:05:43,237 --> 00:05:45,159 Hi, Carlton. 119 00:05:45,178 --> 00:05:46,318 Hi, Steffi, what are you doing here? 120 00:05:46,338 --> 00:05:49,279 I heard the party and I came to see if Ashley was home. 121 00:05:49,299 --> 00:05:51,260 Well, she's away at her Aunt Helen's. 122 00:05:51,280 --> 00:05:52,340 Now, run along. 123 00:05:52,360 --> 00:05:55,162 I don't think you're age-appropriate for this party. 124 00:05:56,274 --> 00:05:57,304 Now.. 125 00:05:58,363 --> 00:06:01,225 ...if you'll excuse me, I'm going swimming. 126 00:06:03,277 --> 00:06:06,338 Hey, Will, any sign of dad yet? 127 00:06:08,229 --> 00:06:10,279 Well.. 128 00:06:10,299 --> 00:06:11,360 That's either him or a rhino 129 00:06:11,381 --> 00:06:13,371 that got his horn chopped off. 130 00:06:17,213 --> 00:06:19,174 Well, I'm going swimming in the neighbor's pool. 131 00:06:19,193 --> 00:06:20,394 Carlton, listen. 132 00:06:21,175 --> 00:06:22,315 We have to stand up to him, man. 133 00:06:22,336 --> 00:06:25,267 If he smells fear, he'll attack. 134 00:06:25,287 --> 00:06:29,229 - How dare you two defy me. - Now, see here, big guy. 135 00:06:29,248 --> 00:06:31,399 [air hissing] 136 00:06:34,341 --> 00:06:37,183 Oh, my God, Howard! 137 00:06:37,202 --> 00:06:39,363 [crying] 138 00:06:39,383 --> 00:06:40,383 Come on, Will, let's get wet. 139 00:06:40,404 --> 00:06:42,236 Ah, young lady, would you mind 140 00:06:42,254 --> 00:06:44,295 putting on some clothes and going home. 141 00:06:44,316 --> 00:06:46,266 Now. 142 00:06:46,287 --> 00:06:50,179 Whoa, baby, baby, baby. Uncle Phil, what you doing, man? 143 00:06:50,198 --> 00:06:51,339 You embarrassing me in front of my friends. 144 00:06:51,360 --> 00:06:54,291 You should have thought of that before you defied me. 145 00:06:54,310 --> 00:06:55,410 Hi, Mr. Banks. 146 00:06:56,191 --> 00:06:58,192 Steffi, do your parents know you're here? 147 00:06:58,212 --> 00:07:00,383 I don't think so. They're in Aspen. 148 00:07:01,344 --> 00:07:04,236 Mmm, and I'm in heaven. 149 00:07:05,386 --> 00:07:08,266 Hey! She came over here on her own. 150 00:07:08,287 --> 00:07:11,309 Will, I am going back in the house and when I come out 151 00:07:11,328 --> 00:07:13,409 I want all of these people gone. 152 00:07:14,190 --> 00:07:16,311 Well, they will be if you come out in the morning, Uncle Phil. 153 00:07:19,363 --> 00:07:20,413 [laughing] Wait, wait, wait. 154 00:07:21,194 --> 00:07:22,354 Let me get this straight, young man. 155 00:07:22,374 --> 00:07:24,425 You are telling me what will 156 00:07:25,205 --> 00:07:28,236 or will not happen in my own house? 157 00:07:28,257 --> 00:07:30,428 Excuse me, but this is my house. 158 00:07:31,207 --> 00:07:33,339 I pay rent here too, eventually. 159 00:07:34,339 --> 00:07:35,429 You watch how you talk to me. 160 00:07:36,209 --> 00:07:38,390 Well, then, Uncle Phil, stop treating me like a child. 161 00:07:38,410 --> 00:07:41,212 Oh, oh, I'm sorry. 162 00:07:41,232 --> 00:07:43,423 I didn't realize I was talking to a man. 163 00:07:44,204 --> 00:07:46,415 That's right. It's me, Will Smith. 164 00:07:46,435 --> 00:07:48,307 - 'Oh, well.' - Man. 165 00:07:48,327 --> 00:07:49,377 Hmm. 166 00:07:49,396 --> 00:07:54,248 I guess you're ready to play a man's game, huh? 167 00:07:56,339 --> 00:08:00,240 Alright, Will, if that's the way you want it. 168 00:08:03,423 --> 00:08:06,283 D-d-don't come back, neither. 169 00:08:07,335 --> 00:08:09,367 [instrumental music] 170 00:08:26,433 --> 00:08:28,428 G, is Uncle Phil around? 171 00:08:28,449 --> 00:08:32,377 The coast is clear. He's in court. 172 00:08:32,396 --> 00:08:34,381 Geoffrey, could you get us some breakfast? 173 00:08:34,401 --> 00:08:36,426 I'm not allowed to serve you anymore. 174 00:08:36,447 --> 00:08:39,303 Mr. Banks' orders. 175 00:08:40,446 --> 00:08:44,334 G, listen, how upset was Uncle Phil last night? 176 00:08:44,354 --> 00:08:47,381 Well, he did something I've never seen him do 177 00:08:47,400 --> 00:08:50,347 in all the years I've been here. 178 00:08:50,368 --> 00:08:52,282 What, a sit-up? 179 00:08:56,350 --> 00:09:00,299 It's a bit more serious than that, I'm afraid. 180 00:09:00,319 --> 00:09:02,484 You know the cherry cheesecake, candied yams 181 00:09:02,505 --> 00:09:05,401 barbecued ribs left over from yesterday? 182 00:09:05,421 --> 00:09:07,336 Yeah. 183 00:09:07,485 --> 00:09:08,547 [gasping] 184 00:09:09,329 --> 00:09:11,374 Oh, my goodness, it's still there. 185 00:09:12,537 --> 00:09:14,462 Oh, I'm afraid. 186 00:09:14,481 --> 00:09:16,566 - Hold me, Will. - Get off of me, man. 187 00:09:18,430 --> 00:09:20,375 I don't know why I ever listen to you. 188 00:09:20,394 --> 00:09:22,419 I was quite content having my father push me around 189 00:09:22,440 --> 00:09:23,492 for the rest of my life. 190 00:09:23,511 --> 00:09:25,426 Now who knows what he's gonna do to us. 191 00:09:25,447 --> 00:09:27,480 Relax, man, what's he gonna do, sue us? 192 00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:32,411 Oh, gosh, now you've gone and spoiled the surprise. 193 00:09:34,497 --> 00:09:35,479 Oh, what's this? 194 00:09:35,499 --> 00:09:37,554 Subpoenas from your father. 195 00:09:37,574 --> 00:09:42,454 And may I say, it's been a pleasure serving you. 196 00:09:48,537 --> 00:09:50,561 Case dismissed. 197 00:09:52,475 --> 00:09:54,570 This is the last case of the day, number 1218. 198 00:09:54,590 --> 00:09:57,427 Phillip Banks versus Will Smith and Carlton Banks 199 00:09:57,447 --> 00:09:58,590 for nonpayment of rent. 200 00:09:58,610 --> 00:10:02,608 Philip, I can't believe you're suing your own son and nephew. 201 00:10:02,629 --> 00:10:04,533 Oh, relax, Lois. 202 00:10:04,553 --> 00:10:06,508 This is just a little lesson in responsibility. 203 00:10:06,528 --> 00:10:08,453 They're probably not even gonna show up. 204 00:10:08,472 --> 00:10:09,564 In fact, they're probably home right now 205 00:10:09,584 --> 00:10:11,579 preparing their apologies. 206 00:10:11,599 --> 00:10:14,605 [dramatic music] 207 00:10:23,677 --> 00:10:26,713 Looks like they've prepared more than an apology. 208 00:10:27,495 --> 00:10:29,580 Mr. Banks, your opening statement. 209 00:10:29,600 --> 00:10:31,674 I don't have an opening statement. 210 00:10:31,694 --> 00:10:34,601 - Mr. Smith. - Thank you. 211 00:10:36,554 --> 00:10:39,661 Your Honor, I'm from West Philadelphia 212 00:10:39,681 --> 00:10:40,673 born and raised. 213 00:10:40,693 --> 00:10:41,736 On the playground is where I spent 214 00:10:41,757 --> 00:10:44,604 most of my days. 215 00:10:44,624 --> 00:10:48,702 I don't have a big bag of fancy courtroom tricks 216 00:10:48,721 --> 00:10:50,766 or a high-priced degree from Princeton 217 00:10:51,549 --> 00:10:54,566 like my worthy adversary, Judge Philip Banks. 218 00:10:54,585 --> 00:10:56,620 But what I do have is the truth! 219 00:10:56,641 --> 00:10:58,704 Oh, shut up, Will! 220 00:10:58,723 --> 00:10:59,766 Your Honor, Mr. Smith is making 221 00:10:59,787 --> 00:11:01,721 a mockery of the entire legal system. 222 00:11:01,740 --> 00:11:05,579 And this man is making a mockery of a finely cut Italian suit. 223 00:11:08,778 --> 00:11:10,821 Order in the court. 224 00:11:11,602 --> 00:11:14,680 Mr. Banks, will you please call your first witness. 225 00:11:14,701 --> 00:11:17,758 - I don't have a witness. - I do, Your Honor. 226 00:11:17,777 --> 00:11:20,632 Fine. Mr. Smith, call your first witness. 227 00:11:20,652 --> 00:11:23,800 Your Honor, I'd like to call someone 228 00:11:23,821 --> 00:11:26,768 who's not afraid to tell the truth.. 229 00:11:26,787 --> 00:11:30,826 ...no matter what landlord Banks might do to him. 230 00:11:30,847 --> 00:11:35,657 Someone who knows the plaintiff intimately. 231 00:11:35,676 --> 00:11:37,741 Like a son, one might say. 232 00:11:37,762 --> 00:11:39,847 Oh, that's great, Will, who do we have? 233 00:11:42,672 --> 00:11:43,714 You, dummy. 234 00:11:44,868 --> 00:11:46,702 Will, when we prepared this case 235 00:11:46,721 --> 00:11:48,686 you didn't say I had to speak against my own father. 236 00:11:48,706 --> 00:11:49,888 Y-y-you don't. 237 00:11:51,823 --> 00:11:52,905 Just read it. 238 00:11:53,687 --> 00:11:56,704 "The night was hot, forcing our party outdoors. 239 00:11:56,723 --> 00:11:58,848 "Will Smith, who is neat, considerate and responsible 240 00:11:58,868 --> 00:12:01,825 "smiled at me was having.." 241 00:12:01,845 --> 00:12:03,880 Smile at me? 242 00:12:04,813 --> 00:12:06,747 Oh, I get it. 243 00:12:12,870 --> 00:12:14,874 No further questions, Your Honor. 244 00:12:15,907 --> 00:12:17,740 Hold it. 245 00:12:17,760 --> 00:12:20,867 I'd like to cross-examine the witness, Your Honor. 246 00:12:20,887 --> 00:12:23,814 Alright, I'm guilty! I'm guilty! 247 00:12:23,835 --> 00:12:26,992 - That will be all. - You may step down. 248 00:12:27,773 --> 00:12:29,857 Welcome to my turf. 249 00:12:31,952 --> 00:12:33,847 How did I do? 250 00:12:37,897 --> 00:12:41,835 Your Honor, I'd like to call my next witness, Miss Hilary Banks. 251 00:12:42,967 --> 00:12:46,886 - Hi, everybody. - Oh, boy. 252 00:12:46,907 --> 00:12:49,012 Will you please take the stand? 253 00:12:49,032 --> 00:12:51,036 Certainly, Your Honor. 254 00:12:52,879 --> 00:12:54,853 Do you swear to tell the truth so help you God? 255 00:12:54,873 --> 00:12:56,888 I do. 256 00:12:58,853 --> 00:13:00,918 Okay, Miss Banks 257 00:13:00,939 --> 00:13:02,932 you were the previous tenant 258 00:13:02,952 --> 00:13:04,897 in the aforementioned pool house 259 00:13:04,917 --> 00:13:05,919 is that correct? 260 00:13:05,939 --> 00:13:07,884 Yes. 261 00:13:07,903 --> 00:13:09,065 And would you please tell us 262 00:13:09,086 --> 00:13:11,081 of your experiences there. 263 00:13:15,951 --> 00:13:17,886 Am I under oath? 264 00:13:17,905 --> 00:13:19,018 Of course. 265 00:13:20,883 --> 00:13:23,038 Well, Trevor would come over at about 3 o'clock 266 00:13:23,057 --> 00:13:24,109 in the morning and we would-- 267 00:13:24,891 --> 00:13:26,976 (all) Objection! 268 00:13:31,015 --> 00:13:34,022 That does it! You may step down. 269 00:13:34,041 --> 00:13:36,917 Mr. Banks, the court would like to know 270 00:13:36,937 --> 00:13:38,070 the impetus for this little lesson 271 00:13:38,090 --> 00:13:40,135 that's being learned, and make it quick. 272 00:13:40,156 --> 00:13:43,102 I have a 5 o'clock hair appointment. 273 00:13:43,123 --> 00:13:45,938 Your Honor, I will show that my tenants 274 00:13:45,957 --> 00:13:47,942 were openly hostile and defiant 275 00:13:47,962 --> 00:13:49,987 leaving me to believe that no rent was forthcoming. 276 00:13:50,007 --> 00:13:53,164 Why, I was reading in my study late one night.. 277 00:13:53,185 --> 00:13:55,159 [all cheering] 278 00:13:58,094 --> 00:14:01,111 [upbeat music] 279 00:14:04,169 --> 00:14:07,156 Yo, yo, man, this party is dumb! 280 00:14:07,176 --> 00:14:09,040 No, man, this party is stupid! 281 00:14:09,060 --> 00:14:11,125 No, no, no, this party is crazy 282 00:14:11,144 --> 00:14:13,058 fly, dumb, deaf, doogy! 283 00:14:13,079 --> 00:14:16,236 - You the man! You the man! - You the man! 284 00:14:17,017 --> 00:14:19,022 - Oh! - Oh! 285 00:14:20,064 --> 00:14:22,038 - Oh! - Oh! 286 00:14:23,222 --> 00:14:28,203 Hi, there. I-I see you're having a gathering. 287 00:14:28,223 --> 00:14:30,088 Isn't that wonderful. 288 00:14:30,108 --> 00:14:32,263 [air hissing] 289 00:14:34,146 --> 00:14:37,173 Hey, pops, you popped my duck. 290 00:14:40,079 --> 00:14:42,294 I'm sorry, son. Here, here's $100. 291 00:14:43,075 --> 00:14:45,250 Yeah, that's more like it. 292 00:14:48,278 --> 00:14:50,263 Hi. 293 00:14:50,283 --> 00:14:53,159 Um, Will, where's your aunt's gold watch 294 00:14:53,179 --> 00:14:55,093 that you promised me? 295 00:14:55,112 --> 00:14:56,225 [laughing] 296 00:14:56,245 --> 00:14:57,327 In time, baby, in time. 297 00:14:58,109 --> 00:15:00,304 Why don't you go on, cool off in the pool a little bit? 298 00:15:00,325 --> 00:15:01,317 Go on, girl. 299 00:15:01,337 --> 00:15:04,164 [laughing] 300 00:15:04,184 --> 00:15:06,278 Hey, hey, look, look, check it out, Heavy P. 301 00:15:06,297 --> 00:15:11,258 Now, why don't you take your Humpty Dumpty butt 302 00:15:11,278 --> 00:15:13,253 on back up to the main house, you know because 303 00:15:13,273 --> 00:15:15,198 you're kind embarrassing us out here little bit. 304 00:15:15,219 --> 00:15:17,272 - You know, what I'm saying? - Oh, well, I-I-I understand. 305 00:15:17,291 --> 00:15:19,156 Well, kids don't like to have adults 306 00:15:19,176 --> 00:15:20,188 hanging around their parties but-- 307 00:15:20,208 --> 00:15:22,233 - Word. - Well, well, could you? 308 00:15:22,254 --> 00:15:25,181 Could you turn your music down just a drop? 309 00:15:25,200 --> 00:15:27,275 We have to consider our neighbors. 310 00:15:27,295 --> 00:15:30,221 [laughing] I am, dude. 311 00:15:30,242 --> 00:15:33,229 Right now I'm considering their 15-year-old daughter. 312 00:15:33,249 --> 00:15:34,351 [laughing] 313 00:15:34,371 --> 00:15:36,296 Hi, Mr. Banks. 314 00:15:36,315 --> 00:15:39,392 Steffi, do your parents know you're here? 315 00:15:39,413 --> 00:15:42,249 - To hell with my parents. - Whoo! 316 00:15:42,419 --> 00:15:44,383 Will taught me that. 317 00:15:47,239 --> 00:15:49,324 And you know, she came over here on her own, chief. 318 00:15:49,344 --> 00:15:51,238 Oh, I believe you. 319 00:15:51,258 --> 00:15:54,255 Well, I guess I better go back in the house. 320 00:15:54,275 --> 00:15:55,387 Well, I, I know I can trust you. 321 00:15:55,407 --> 00:15:57,252 I know we've had our differences 322 00:15:57,272 --> 00:15:59,446 but boy, you're a great kid. 323 00:15:59,467 --> 00:16:01,402 Boy! 324 00:16:01,421 --> 00:16:02,453 You callin' me "Boy?" 325 00:16:02,474 --> 00:16:04,418 You better step to me like a man! 326 00:16:04,438 --> 00:16:06,393 Now get to stepping! Now get to stepping! 327 00:16:06,412 --> 00:16:09,419 Okay, Will, if that's the way you want it. 328 00:16:13,397 --> 00:16:18,328 Whoa, whoa, oh, pa-lease! 329 00:16:18,350 --> 00:16:21,336 Your Honor, that is not the way it went down. 330 00:16:21,356 --> 00:16:24,362 How did it go down, Mr. Smith? 331 00:16:24,383 --> 00:16:25,495 I'm glad you asked me that question. 332 00:16:25,515 --> 00:16:27,510 Listen, check it out, look, the night was so hot 333 00:16:27,530 --> 00:16:30,447 people was pulling up on camels, right? 334 00:16:30,466 --> 00:16:32,348 So listen.. 335 00:16:34,452 --> 00:16:37,376 [guitar music] 336 00:16:50,336 --> 00:16:53,510 Um, Gayle, would you mind 337 00:16:53,530 --> 00:16:57,456 if I commented on your swimsuit? 338 00:16:57,475 --> 00:17:00,369 Don't tell me, it's too revealing? 339 00:17:00,389 --> 00:17:02,572 Oh, just a little bit, you know. 340 00:17:03,355 --> 00:17:05,398 Listen, I've got some old T-shirts in there 341 00:17:05,417 --> 00:17:07,360 that I was gonna drop off for the homeless 342 00:17:07,380 --> 00:17:09,532 but you're welcome to put one on to cover up. 343 00:17:09,553 --> 00:17:13,460 Oh, Will, my parents adore you. 344 00:17:14,591 --> 00:17:17,435 Oh, Gayle, bring out that book of hymns 345 00:17:17,454 --> 00:17:19,408 I was telling you about. 346 00:17:21,381 --> 00:17:23,514 Oh, this heat is unbearable. 347 00:17:24,595 --> 00:17:27,470 I need to take a dip in the pool. 348 00:17:27,489 --> 00:17:31,495 Unh, unh, unh-huh, safety first, my little non-swimmer. 349 00:17:32,608 --> 00:17:34,511 Oh. 350 00:17:34,531 --> 00:17:37,595 Only if dad would fix the air conditioner in the pool house 351 00:17:37,615 --> 00:17:41,531 we wouldn't have to be out in the sweltering heat. 352 00:17:41,551 --> 00:17:43,584 How could he be so cruel? 353 00:17:43,604 --> 00:17:46,447 He's mad, I tell you, mad. 354 00:17:48,450 --> 00:17:51,544 Stop it. You will not speak of Uncle Phil that way. 355 00:17:51,565 --> 00:17:54,490 He may be an unreasonable, pigheaded dictator 356 00:17:54,509 --> 00:17:56,592 but he is your father and my uncle 357 00:17:56,613 --> 00:17:58,646 and you will show him some respect. 358 00:18:00,477 --> 00:18:03,442 You're right, Will. Thanks. 359 00:18:04,493 --> 00:18:07,497 [rumbling] 360 00:18:09,481 --> 00:18:13,556 It's...It's...It's him. 361 00:18:18,544 --> 00:18:21,608 Do you know how humiliating it is 362 00:18:21,629 --> 00:18:24,574 to have a son who can't swim? 363 00:18:25,626 --> 00:18:28,559 [air hissing] 364 00:18:31,553 --> 00:18:32,635 [crying] 365 00:18:38,705 --> 00:18:41,529 - Listen, Uncle Phil-- - Silence. 366 00:18:41,548 --> 00:18:43,731 If I want your opinion, I'll beat it out of you. 367 00:18:45,594 --> 00:18:49,519 - Hello, Mr. Banks. - What's she doing here? 368 00:18:49,539 --> 00:18:51,682 U-Uncle Phil, sh-she wandered over, lonely and crying 369 00:18:51,703 --> 00:18:53,557 and I didn't have the heart to turn her away. 370 00:18:53,576 --> 00:18:56,550 Hit the bricks, you little tramp! 371 00:18:56,570 --> 00:18:58,572 Out of here! 372 00:18:58,592 --> 00:19:01,737 And tell your mother your father has a girlfriend! 373 00:19:01,759 --> 00:19:03,741 I'm going back into the house, and when I come out 374 00:19:03,761 --> 00:19:07,747 I want all these freeloading parasites out of here! 375 00:19:07,767 --> 00:19:09,650 Ye-ye-yes, sir, within the hour. 376 00:19:09,670 --> 00:19:12,674 - Five minutes! - Four. 377 00:19:12,694 --> 00:19:15,609 Alright, Will.. 378 00:19:15,628 --> 00:19:18,622 ...if that's the way you want it. 379 00:19:19,643 --> 00:19:21,667 [laughing] 380 00:19:26,795 --> 00:19:29,599 And then he slapped me with a subpoena. 381 00:19:30,650 --> 00:19:33,774 - Thank you, Mr. Smith. - You're welcome. 382 00:19:36,669 --> 00:19:40,694 Mr. Banks, will you please approach the bench. 383 00:19:41,757 --> 00:19:43,700 Is that victory I smell? 384 00:19:48,727 --> 00:19:50,600 I am disappointed in you 385 00:19:50,619 --> 00:19:52,742 for allowing your family relationship to come to this. 386 00:19:52,763 --> 00:19:55,637 - That's what we saying. - Ah, s-s-shame. 387 00:19:55,656 --> 00:19:57,830 Yeah, ju...oh, shame. 388 00:19:58,612 --> 00:19:59,754 In lieu of a written lease 389 00:19:59,774 --> 00:20:00,815 the law stipulates 390 00:20:00,835 --> 00:20:03,639 a landlord must provide his tenants 391 00:20:03,658 --> 00:20:05,751 with electricity, gas and plumbing. 392 00:20:05,773 --> 00:20:07,655 Yeah. 393 00:20:07,674 --> 00:20:09,767 However, air conditioning 394 00:20:09,788 --> 00:20:11,841 is considered a luxury. 395 00:20:11,861 --> 00:20:13,714 Rent cannot be withheld 396 00:20:13,733 --> 00:20:17,678 based on a malfunctioning appliance. 397 00:20:17,698 --> 00:20:19,812 Meaning? 398 00:20:19,833 --> 00:20:21,836 Meaning you'll have to pay the rent. 399 00:20:21,856 --> 00:20:23,738 Yes! 400 00:20:23,757 --> 00:20:26,682 This will be a good one for the cocktail parties, Philip. 401 00:20:26,702 --> 00:20:28,865 [laughing] 402 00:20:32,892 --> 00:20:34,835 We're going to appeal this decision. 403 00:20:34,855 --> 00:20:36,798 I intend to cite the landmark case 404 00:20:36,818 --> 00:20:38,870 of Rhode Island versus Schechter Poultry. 405 00:20:38,891 --> 00:20:40,743 Carlton, that has to do with 406 00:20:40,762 --> 00:20:41,824 the right to hang dead chickens 407 00:20:41,845 --> 00:20:43,758 in a butcher-shop window. 408 00:20:44,889 --> 00:20:48,826 Well, then, you see where I'm going with this. 409 00:20:54,914 --> 00:20:57,819 [clearing throat] 410 00:20:57,839 --> 00:21:01,764 Guess this whole thing got a little out of hand, huh? 411 00:21:01,783 --> 00:21:03,787 Yeah. 412 00:21:03,807 --> 00:21:05,799 Will.. 413 00:21:05,819 --> 00:21:07,712 Look, let's.. 414 00:21:07,732 --> 00:21:10,827 ...let's try not to let this ever happen again, huh? 415 00:21:13,811 --> 00:21:15,854 I don't want your hand, I want my rent. 416 00:21:16,886 --> 00:21:18,810 Oh, man, I don't believe. 417 00:21:18,829 --> 00:21:20,831 Uncle Phil, didn't you learn nothing from all this mess? 418 00:21:20,851 --> 00:21:23,735 Yeah, never rent to relatives. 419 00:21:24,817 --> 00:21:26,790 What did we go through this whole episode for? 420 00:21:26,810 --> 00:21:27,821 Money. 421 00:21:27,842 --> 00:21:29,764 Well, you could at least say you're sorry. 422 00:21:29,784 --> 00:21:31,807 Not until you say it first. 423 00:21:35,904 --> 00:21:38,778 Will you please take the stand? 424 00:21:38,797 --> 00:21:40,911 Certainly, Your Honor. 425 00:21:42,833 --> 00:21:44,856 Do you swear to tell the truth, so help you God? 426 00:21:44,876 --> 00:21:46,940 [laughing] I'm sorry.