1
00:00:02,100 --> 00:00:03,248
(Hilary)
'Family, I have
an announcement.'

2
00:00:03,267 --> 00:00:06,216
Listen, "Playboy" is doing
a pictorial

3
00:00:06,236 --> 00:00:09,276
on the prettiest weather
girls from coast to coast.

4
00:00:09,297 --> 00:00:12,337
They're gonna call it
"Warm Fronts."

5
00:00:17,350 --> 00:00:20,188
And they want me to be in it.

6
00:00:20,207 --> 00:00:22,150
Absolutely not.

7
00:00:22,170 --> 00:00:23,388
But daddy,
don't you even wanna hear

8
00:00:23,408 --> 00:00:24,425
what I have to say about it?

9
00:00:25,151 --> 00:00:28,221
You heard our father, no!

10
00:00:28,241 --> 00:00:29,429
Carlton, what do you care?

11
00:00:29,448 --> 00:00:31,391
Look, I will not be
publicly embarrassed

12
00:00:31,411 --> 00:00:33,273
by a potential scandal.

13
00:00:33,294 --> 00:00:36,294
Now, now, don't get
your underoos in a knot, stumpy.

14
00:00:38,457 --> 00:00:39,504
Hilary knows what she's doin'.

15
00:00:39,525 --> 00:00:41,306
Wait a minute, I haven't
even decided--

16
00:00:41,327 --> 00:00:45,293
Quiet, Hilary,
work with me here, Hil.

17
00:00:45,313 --> 00:00:46,480
I can see it now.

18
00:00:46,500 --> 00:00:49,420
Long afternoons kicking back
on a chaise longue

19
00:00:49,440 --> 00:00:52,580
watchin' full-body contact
volleyball up at Hef's place.

20
00:00:54,421 --> 00:00:55,549
Hilary..

21
00:00:55,569 --> 00:00:57,461
...as long as
you live in my house

22
00:00:57,481 --> 00:00:59,484
you will abide by my rules.

23
00:00:59,506 --> 00:01:01,438
And that goes for
the rest of you.

24
00:01:01,458 --> 00:01:02,535
That's telling us, dad.

25
00:01:03,662 --> 00:01:05,504
Wait.

26
00:01:05,524 --> 00:01:08,644
I am 24 years old,
and I can make my own decisions.

27
00:01:08,665 --> 00:01:11,514
Besides, mom said it was okay.

28
00:01:12,490 --> 00:01:14,695
Oh, yeah? Vivian!

29
00:01:14,714 --> 00:01:17,724
So you said your daughter
could pose in "Playboy," huh?

30
00:01:17,745 --> 00:01:20,654
No, I said I didn't
like the idea.

31
00:01:20,673 --> 00:01:22,636
But I also said
she's a grown woman

32
00:01:22,656 --> 00:01:24,558
and it's her choice.

33
00:01:24,579 --> 00:01:28,756
No daughter of mine is posing in
that kind of magazine, period.

34
00:01:29,784 --> 00:01:31,847
You do this to me
all the time, daddy.

35
00:01:31,867 --> 00:01:34,676
I have a mind of my own
and opinions.

36
00:01:34,696 --> 00:01:38,702
And you never let me
express them and..

37
00:01:38,722 --> 00:01:39,880
What were we talking about?

38
00:01:43,955 --> 00:01:46,945
Hil, I-I think you were in the
process of stormin' out of here.

39
00:01:46,966 --> 00:01:48,863
Thanks, Will.

40
00:01:51,016 --> 00:01:53,831
[theme song]

41
00:01:53,852 --> 00:01:54,923
♪ Now this is a story ♪

42
00:01:54,942 --> 00:01:56,952
♪ All about how my life
got flipped ♪

43
00:01:56,973 --> 00:01:58,136
♪ Turned upside-down ♪

44
00:01:58,156 --> 00:02:00,227
♪ And I'd like to take a minute
just sit right there ♪

45
00:02:00,962 --> 00:02:02,063
♪ I'll tell you
how I became the prince ♪

46
00:02:02,083 --> 00:02:04,021
♪ Of a town called Bel-Air ♪

47
00:02:12,438 --> 00:02:15,335
♪ In West Philadelphia,
born and raised ♪

48
00:02:15,355 --> 00:02:17,569
♪ On the playground is where
I spent most of my days ♪

49
00:02:18,303 --> 00:02:19,619
♪ Chillin' out, maxin'
relaxing all cool ♪

50
00:02:20,353 --> 00:02:22,556
♪ And all shootin' some b-ball
outside of the school ♪

51
00:02:22,576 --> 00:02:24,719
♪ When a couple of guys
who were up to no good ♪

52
00:02:25,453 --> 00:02:27,524
♪ Started makin' trouble
in my neighborhood ♪

53
00:02:27,545 --> 00:02:29,708
♪ I got in one little fight
and my mom got scared ♪

54
00:02:29,727 --> 00:02:30,768
♪ And said you're moving
with your auntie ♪

55
00:02:30,789 --> 00:02:32,666
♪ And uncle in Bel-Air ♪

56
00:02:32,686 --> 00:02:34,695
♪ I whistled for a cab
and when it came near ♪

57
00:02:34,717 --> 00:02:36,961
♪ The license plate said fresh
and it had dice in the mirror ♪

58
00:02:37,694 --> 00:02:39,796
♪ If anything I can say
that this cab was rare ♪

59
00:02:39,817 --> 00:02:40,847
♪ But I thought
nah forget it ♪

60
00:02:40,868 --> 00:02:43,806
♪ Yo homes to Bel-Air ♪

61
00:02:43,826 --> 00:02:46,131
♪ I pulled up to a house
about seven or eight ♪

62
00:02:46,866 --> 00:02:48,008
♪ And I yelled
to the cabbie ♪

63
00:02:48,028 --> 00:02:49,170
♪ Yo homes smell you later ♪

64
00:02:49,192 --> 00:02:51,242
♪ I looked at my kingdom
I was finally there ♪

65
00:02:51,976 --> 00:02:55,056
♪ To sit on my throne
as the prince of Bel-Air ♪♪

66
00:02:55,078 --> 00:02:58,158
[instrumental music]

67
00:03:05,400 --> 00:03:07,375
So, what do you think?

68
00:03:07,395 --> 00:03:10,243
Look like you got hat-jacked
by Woody Woodpecker.

69
00:03:14,344 --> 00:03:15,497
These are the new booster hats.

70
00:03:15,516 --> 00:03:18,404
- Help me set up a display.
- Sure thing, boss lady.

71
00:03:20,279 --> 00:03:23,317
Oh, Jackie, check it out,
hypothetical situation.

72
00:03:23,338 --> 00:03:26,285
Let's just say, like,
a famous men's magazine

73
00:03:26,306 --> 00:03:29,494
asked you to pose with nothing
but that stupid hat on.

74
00:03:29,513 --> 00:03:31,488
- Would you do it?
- No way.

75
00:03:31,509 --> 00:03:33,534
I don't want just anybody
lookin' at this body.

76
00:03:33,554 --> 00:03:36,362
Oh, why, has it changed so much
since we used to play doctor?

77
00:03:36,381 --> 00:03:38,496
- Stop it.
- See, you have beautiful teeth.

78
00:03:38,516 --> 00:03:41,374
I didn't even know you had
those, that was fun, wasn't it?

79
00:03:41,394 --> 00:03:43,610
Imagine how much more fun it
would be if we was both naked.

80
00:03:48,463 --> 00:03:50,599
Will, you just hit on me
from force of habit.

81
00:03:50,619 --> 00:03:52,644
Now, if you really
wanna go out with me

82
00:03:53,365 --> 00:03:54,548
why not step to me like a
man?

83
00:03:58,640 --> 00:04:00,374
Well, okay.

84
00:04:11,573 --> 00:04:12,635
So Jacqueline..

85
00:04:15,423 --> 00:04:16,586
...I was wondering if
you'd do me the honor

86
00:04:16,606 --> 00:04:18,481
of having dinner with me.

87
00:04:18,501 --> 00:04:20,436
Okay.

88
00:04:20,456 --> 00:04:22,451
"Okay?"

89
00:04:22,472 --> 00:04:23,615
"Okay" is alright
if I offered you

90
00:04:23,634 --> 00:04:27,544
a government cheese sandwich
but I'm offering you

91
00:04:27,565 --> 00:04:30,623
a buffet of love, child.

92
00:04:30,642 --> 00:04:31,675
Take it easy, homey.

93
00:04:31,696 --> 00:04:34,483
I mean, you asked
like a gentleman.

94
00:04:34,503 --> 00:04:35,747
Now if you can just keep
acting like a gentleman

95
00:04:36,468 --> 00:04:37,682
maybe we can get somewhere.

96
00:04:37,702 --> 00:04:40,679
Somewhere that we could
talk lying down?

97
00:04:40,700 --> 00:04:42,564
- Will!
- Alright, Jackie, I'm sorry.

98
00:04:42,584 --> 00:04:45,542
I'm sorry, a temporary cool
breakdown, I'm back now.

99
00:04:45,561 --> 00:04:48,619
Um, look, so when is
good for you?

100
00:04:48,639 --> 00:04:50,725
I don't know, I was thinkin'
about this afternoon

101
00:04:50,746 --> 00:04:53,523
leading into the evening.

102
00:04:53,542 --> 00:04:54,725
You know what the evening leads

103
00:04:54,746 --> 00:04:56,551
I'm sorry, I need
to have that treated.

104
00:04:56,571 --> 00:04:59,729
- I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
- I'll call you later.

105
00:05:01,804 --> 00:05:03,749
Come without
the stupid hat, okay?

106
00:05:06,778 --> 00:05:09,615
Hey, girl, I was..
Would you stop it!

107
00:05:09,634 --> 00:05:10,837
Stop, stop, stop.

108
00:05:11,851 --> 00:05:14,678
[instrumental music]

109
00:05:16,573 --> 00:05:20,584
Hilary, are you really
going to pose in that magazine?

110
00:05:20,603 --> 00:05:22,818
- Why? Does it bother you?
- A little.

111
00:05:22,839 --> 00:05:25,647
I don't even like to get
undressed in gym class.

112
00:05:30,780 --> 00:05:33,788
Ashley, your body is
going through some changes

113
00:05:33,807 --> 00:05:36,905
and they may seem
awkward and embarrassing

114
00:05:37,628 --> 00:05:39,864
but I promise you,
it's completely normal.

115
00:05:39,884 --> 00:05:42,781
And the discomfort,
it's only temporary.

116
00:05:44,665 --> 00:05:46,711
I know, I look great naked.

117
00:05:49,709 --> 00:05:50,782
It's just that I don't like

118
00:05:50,801 --> 00:05:52,957
a bunch of gooney people
staring at me.

119
00:05:53,679 --> 00:05:54,772
Oh, you get used to it.

120
00:06:00,888 --> 00:06:03,735
I guess I could kiss heaven
goodbye 'cause it got to be

121
00:06:03,756 --> 00:06:04,849
a sin to look this good.

122
00:06:07,957 --> 00:06:09,752
[imitates sizzling]

123
00:06:09,772 --> 00:06:10,875
Caliente.

124
00:06:12,789 --> 00:06:14,894
You've been playing tennis with
the gardener again, haven't you?

125
00:06:15,997 --> 00:06:17,020
Adios.

126
00:06:18,804 --> 00:06:19,927
You do look great, Will.

127
00:06:19,947 --> 00:06:21,842
Oh, thanks a lot, Hil.
Oh, you can help me out.

128
00:06:21,863 --> 00:06:23,959
Uh, I need a like a name of real
smoking place to take a date.

129
00:06:23,979 --> 00:06:26,816
Oh, sure, we can talk about
it
on the way to the party.

130
00:06:26,835 --> 00:06:29,823
- I'm gonna go get dressed.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, what party?

131
00:06:29,843 --> 00:06:32,029
Well, isn't that why
you're all dressed up?

132
00:06:32,049 --> 00:06:35,027
Oh, did I forget to tell you?

133
00:06:35,047 --> 00:06:36,952
I think you're still in
the process of forgetting.

134
00:06:39,910 --> 00:06:41,043
"Playboy" called.

135
00:06:41,062 --> 00:06:43,028
They're having a pool party
at the mansion

136
00:06:43,049 --> 00:06:45,916
to kick off
the weather girl shoot.

137
00:06:45,935 --> 00:06:47,068
And?

138
00:06:47,088 --> 00:06:51,921
And since you stood up for
me
with daddy, I'm taking you.

139
00:06:51,942 --> 00:06:53,897
Yes, I knew that.

140
00:06:56,112 --> 00:07:00,052
Hey, let me tell you, you're the
best cousin a brother ever had.

141
00:07:00,073 --> 00:07:02,028
I'm going to
the Playboy Mansion.

142
00:07:05,106 --> 00:07:07,913
Oh, hello, Hef.

143
00:07:07,932 --> 00:07:09,978
Oh, pshaw.

144
00:07:09,998 --> 00:07:13,066
Don't be silly,
I'm glad I could come.

145
00:07:13,086 --> 00:07:17,096
Oh, Miss December,
Oh, baby, I was gonna call you.

146
00:07:17,117 --> 00:07:18,962
Come here, girl.

147
00:07:24,105 --> 00:07:27,092
Excuse me, Master William,
if you can tear yourself away

148
00:07:27,113 --> 00:07:29,038
from your imaginary friend..

149
00:07:31,013 --> 00:07:33,960
...a Miss Jacqueline's
on the phone.

150
00:07:33,981 --> 00:07:36,107
Oh, oh, I forgot
all about Jackie.

151
00:07:36,126 --> 00:07:38,221
Look, G, G, G, um, look

152
00:07:38,944 --> 00:07:41,050
If you had to decide between
goin' on a date with a girl

153
00:07:41,070 --> 00:07:43,125
that you really care about
and
going to the Playboy Mansion

154
00:07:43,144 --> 00:07:44,227
which would it be?

155
00:07:44,248 --> 00:07:46,995
The fact that you're even
asking, Master William

156
00:07:47,015 --> 00:07:50,043
tells me that you
really care about the lady.

157
00:07:50,063 --> 00:07:53,161
- I guess I do.
- Admirable.

158
00:07:53,180 --> 00:07:57,091
Tell me, might this young lady
have a terminal illness?

159
00:08:00,139 --> 00:08:02,014
No, G, of course not.

160
00:08:02,034 --> 00:08:05,162
Then may I point out,
she'll still be here tomorrow.

161
00:08:19,049 --> 00:08:21,064
Oh, I'm sorry, babe,
I'm sick.

162
00:08:21,083 --> 00:08:23,078
No, no, no,
don't come over.

163
00:08:23,100 --> 00:08:25,265
Because, you know,
I could be catchy.

164
00:08:25,285 --> 00:08:27,090
Well, you know, I-I guess

165
00:08:27,110 --> 00:08:29,125
I'll-I'll just have to
talk to you tomorrow?

166
00:08:31,340 --> 00:08:32,373
Bye.

167
00:08:34,339 --> 00:08:37,287
So, when do we leave
for the mansion?

168
00:08:40,104 --> 00:08:42,169
Oh, they don't need you, G,
they're fully staffed.

169
00:08:54,351 --> 00:08:57,399
Either that is one tight
dress
or a really good paint job.

170
00:08:59,384 --> 00:09:02,161
- Come on, let's go.
- Wait a minute, Will.

171
00:09:02,180 --> 00:09:04,276
I think I'm having
second thoughts.

172
00:09:04,296 --> 00:09:05,369
What do you mean?

173
00:09:05,390 --> 00:09:07,174
Well, I don't know if doing
the layout is worth

174
00:09:07,194 --> 00:09:09,359
having daddy hate me
for the rest of my life.

175
00:09:09,380 --> 00:09:11,385
No, no, no, it's only
the rest of his life.

176
00:09:13,310 --> 00:09:14,383
I'm sayin' after them
pictures come out

177
00:09:14,403 --> 00:09:16,409
how much longer could he
have?

178
00:09:16,429 --> 00:09:18,253
- Will.
- I'm joking, I'm joking.

179
00:09:18,273 --> 00:09:20,439
I'm joking, I thought
you wanted to do the pictures.

180
00:09:20,459 --> 00:09:22,274
Well, I do.

181
00:09:22,294 --> 00:09:23,367
I'm saying you can't
just let your pop

182
00:09:23,386 --> 00:09:25,461
be pushing you around
all the time.

183
00:09:25,481 --> 00:09:30,284
It'd be so much easier
if only he liked "Playboy."

184
00:09:30,305 --> 00:09:31,428
Liked it?

185
00:09:31,448 --> 00:09:34,385
He's got issues in his bathroom
from, like, 1964.

186
00:09:36,330 --> 00:09:37,363
Come on, just
don't worry about it.

187
00:09:37,382 --> 00:09:39,518
Let's just go to the party.

188
00:09:39,538 --> 00:09:41,403
Freeze!

189
00:09:41,423 --> 00:09:44,310
Oh, look, the Little Republican
Store must've opened.

190
00:09:46,295 --> 00:09:49,303
Good joke, Will, I'll laugh
on the way to the party.

191
00:09:49,323 --> 00:09:50,456
Whoa, teeny.

192
00:09:52,503 --> 00:09:54,458
What makes you think you're
going to the party with us?

193
00:09:54,477 --> 00:09:56,362
Look, I'm not gonna
miss out on Princeton

194
00:09:56,383 --> 00:09:58,508
because she wants to expose
her weather balloons.

195
00:10:02,458 --> 00:10:05,445
Carlton, I think
Geoffrey's baking cookies.

196
00:10:05,465 --> 00:10:08,564
Oh..
Oh, no, you don't.

197
00:10:12,514 --> 00:10:14,469
Look, I'm gonna talk
to Mr. Hefner

198
00:10:14,489 --> 00:10:15,532
and put a stop to this.

199
00:10:15,553 --> 00:10:16,626
My voice will be heard.

200
00:10:16,645 --> 00:10:18,459
You must take me with you.

201
00:10:19,652 --> 00:10:21,407
Sure.

202
00:10:26,471 --> 00:10:28,597
How can you let him
come with us?

203
00:10:28,617 --> 00:10:30,522
Trust me, he ain't
gonna say nothing.

204
00:10:30,541 --> 00:10:32,426
Well, how can you be so sure?

205
00:10:32,446 --> 00:10:33,519
This boy gets all hot
and bothered

206
00:10:33,539 --> 00:10:34,672
talking to
average-looking girls.

207
00:10:34,692 --> 00:10:37,489
Five minutes at the mansion
he's gonna go into meltdown.

208
00:10:40,697 --> 00:10:42,502
[horn honks]

209
00:10:48,588 --> 00:10:50,533
I can't believe it, girl.

210
00:10:50,554 --> 00:10:52,629
Yo, it's just like
the magazine.

211
00:10:52,650 --> 00:10:54,484
'Except the girls
ain't got folds'

212
00:10:54,503 --> 00:10:55,646
in the middle
and jokes on their back.

213
00:11:01,553 --> 00:11:02,696
Carlton, stand up.

214
00:11:02,716 --> 00:11:04,621
You're drooling on my pumps.

215
00:11:05,734 --> 00:11:07,568
Come on, you guys.

216
00:11:08,741 --> 00:11:10,606
My legs are like rubber.

217
00:11:10,625 --> 00:11:12,540
Yeah, and your head
is like a peanut.

218
00:11:14,617 --> 00:11:16,712
Carlton, what was it you wanted
to say to Mr. Hefner?

219
00:11:16,732 --> 00:11:18,748
I want to tell him
how much I love this place.

220
00:11:18,768 --> 00:11:20,663
Hey, look at that swimming pool.

221
00:11:24,582 --> 00:11:26,727
I have never seen
so many people in one place.

222
00:11:26,748 --> 00:11:31,591
I wanted to give
mouth-to-mouth resuscitation to.

223
00:11:31,610 --> 00:11:32,683
Breathin' okay?

224
00:11:35,652 --> 00:11:36,664
Hey, Hugh.

225
00:11:36,684 --> 00:11:37,767
Will, why are you
shouting at me?

226
00:11:37,787 --> 00:11:39,813
- I'm right next to you.
- Not you. Hugh.

227
00:11:39,832 --> 00:11:41,857
- You who?
- Stop yodeling.

228
00:11:42,580 --> 00:11:43,813
Hugh Hefner.

229
00:11:43,833 --> 00:11:45,662
Excuse me.

230
00:11:45,682 --> 00:11:48,639
Hey, Mr. Hefner,
what an honor.

231
00:11:48,659 --> 00:11:51,577
Um, I'm Will Smith,
this is my cousin, Hilary.

232
00:11:51,596 --> 00:11:53,655
Oh, a pleasure, Hilary Banks.

233
00:11:53,676 --> 00:11:55,704
I'm glad you could make it.
Let me show you around.

234
00:11:55,723 --> 00:11:57,632
Oh, I'd be honored.

235
00:11:57,653 --> 00:11:59,601
Relax, guys,
have some fun.

236
00:11:59,620 --> 00:12:00,769
There are suits
in the bathhouse.

237
00:12:02,738 --> 00:12:04,646
Yeah.

238
00:12:04,667 --> 00:12:06,566
You def, Hef.

239
00:12:06,585 --> 00:12:08,773
Will, why didn't you
introduce me?

240
00:12:08,794 --> 00:12:10,593
Hey, Carlton,
I gotta be honest, man.

241
00:12:10,612 --> 00:12:11,831
I forgot you was even here.

242
00:12:12,840 --> 00:12:14,659
Oh, that's just great.

243
00:12:16,678 --> 00:12:18,727
Hey, Will, isn't that Jazz?

244
00:12:22,822 --> 00:12:24,651
Jazz, what are you doing here?

245
00:12:24,672 --> 00:12:27,560
Shh, I'm on the list.

246
00:12:27,579 --> 00:12:29,667
They think I'm the black dude
from "Mod Squad."

247
00:12:38,551 --> 00:12:40,589
Would you like to have dinner
with the children, sir?

248
00:12:40,610 --> 00:12:42,589
Yes, that would be nice,
Geoffrey.

249
00:12:42,609 --> 00:12:43,708
Too bad, they're not here.

250
00:12:46,545 --> 00:12:47,704
Then why did you bring it up?

251
00:12:47,725 --> 00:12:50,622
If you don't care where
your children are, sir

252
00:12:50,642 --> 00:12:52,611
neither do I.

253
00:12:52,631 --> 00:12:55,569
Okay, where are they?

254
00:12:55,588 --> 00:12:59,705
Sir...I could never betray
their confidence.

255
00:13:03,791 --> 00:13:06,589
They're at
the Playboy Mansion.

256
00:13:06,610 --> 00:13:07,650
All except young Ashley.

257
00:13:07,669 --> 00:13:09,537
She's upstairs
with her boyfriend.

258
00:13:11,756 --> 00:13:14,664
- That one's on the house.
- 'Vivian!'

259
00:13:14,683 --> 00:13:16,662
Vivian! Vivian!

260
00:13:16,682 --> 00:13:19,789
Oh, Philip,
did you call me?

261
00:13:20,510 --> 00:13:21,689
Do you know where your
children are?

262
00:13:21,709 --> 00:13:24,577
Sure, they're at
the Playboy Mansion.

263
00:13:24,597 --> 00:13:26,535
How come you knew that
and I didn't?

264
00:13:26,554 --> 00:13:28,783
- Because they talk to me.
- Why don't they talk to me?

265
00:13:29,503 --> 00:13:30,762
Because you don't listen,
every time--

266
00:13:34,689 --> 00:13:37,727
[instrumental music]

267
00:13:43,671 --> 00:13:45,730
Wazzup, baby, what you doing
after the party?

268
00:13:46,690 --> 00:13:50,497
Actually, I'll be in surgery.

269
00:13:50,516 --> 00:13:54,603
Looks like everything on
that
body is in working order.

270
00:13:54,623 --> 00:13:56,562
I'll be performing surgery.

271
00:13:56,582 --> 00:13:57,752
I'm a doctor.

272
00:13:58,481 --> 00:14:02,568
Well, doc, you can check me
out anytime, trust me.

273
00:14:02,588 --> 00:14:05,586
I'm a cardiologist,
you need a pediatrician.

274
00:14:08,492 --> 00:14:09,692
Miss March, right?

275
00:14:09,713 --> 00:14:11,511
I didn't recognize you
with your clothes on.

276
00:14:11,530 --> 00:14:12,659
Oh, don't tell me,
don't tell me, don't tell me.

277
00:14:12,680 --> 00:14:16,527
Uh, turn-ons, uh, fast cars,
uh, shrimp bouillabaisse

278
00:14:16,547 --> 00:14:18,576
and, uh, Indian quilts, right?

279
00:14:18,595 --> 00:14:19,684
Very impressive.

280
00:14:19,705 --> 00:14:21,664
Now, do you remember
my turn-offs?

281
00:14:21,683 --> 00:14:25,481
Do I? Hairy backs, smokers
and abrasive young men

282
00:14:25,500 --> 00:14:27,508
who don't know
when to shut up, right?

283
00:14:27,529 --> 00:14:28,558
Bingo.

284
00:14:31,576 --> 00:14:32,645
Girl, what would it take

285
00:14:32,665 --> 00:14:35,553
for a guy like me to get next
to a girl like you?

286
00:14:35,573 --> 00:14:37,502
Five years and six figures.

287
00:14:39,650 --> 00:14:40,699
Thank you very much.

288
00:14:42,577 --> 00:14:44,585
So tell me about yourself.

289
00:14:44,605 --> 00:14:46,554
I have a boyfriend
who plays in the Lakers.

290
00:14:48,572 --> 00:14:52,439
I suppose your boyfriend's
a tackle for the Rams, huh?

291
00:14:52,459 --> 00:14:54,548
No, The Raiders.

292
00:14:54,568 --> 00:14:55,657
Get away from me.

293
00:14:58,646 --> 00:15:00,724
Hey, Will, hey,
this place is great.

294
00:15:01,442 --> 00:15:03,531
I've already got two numbers
and if I play my cards right

295
00:15:03,552 --> 00:15:06,430
I think she'll give me
the other five.

296
00:15:06,449 --> 00:15:08,597
Oh, Carlton, I don't think I'm
gonna hang around to find out.

297
00:15:08,618 --> 00:15:11,676
'Cause I bein' up here helped me
realize how important Jackie..

298
00:15:11,695 --> 00:15:13,453
Bunny hop!

299
00:15:15,543 --> 00:15:16,632
...really is to me.

300
00:15:19,569 --> 00:15:22,596
[instrumental music]

301
00:15:36,426 --> 00:15:37,545
What do you think you're doing?

302
00:15:37,565 --> 00:15:39,444
The-the-the bunny hop.

303
00:15:43,492 --> 00:15:44,611
Where's your sister?

304
00:15:44,631 --> 00:15:46,609
She went to Malibu with
the other weather girls

305
00:15:46,629 --> 00:15:48,478
to have their pictures
taken.

306
00:15:48,498 --> 00:15:49,667
Go wait in the car, Carlton.

307
00:15:49,686 --> 00:15:51,614
But I was just gonna go talk
to Mr. Hefner about Hilary..

308
00:15:51,635 --> 00:15:54,493
Go get in the car, Carlton.

309
00:16:00,469 --> 00:16:02,537
I, uh, really wanna thank you
for taking the time

310
00:16:02,556 --> 00:16:03,665
to talk to me, Mr. Hefner.

311
00:16:04,386 --> 00:16:05,465
Well, it's always
a pleasure to talk

312
00:16:05,485 --> 00:16:06,604
to a long-time subscriber.

313
00:16:10,560 --> 00:16:11,659
My man, Linc.

314
00:16:13,619 --> 00:16:17,436
Uh.. I wanna cut right
to the chase here.

315
00:16:17,456 --> 00:16:20,593
It's about my daughter
posing for your magazine.

316
00:16:20,613 --> 00:16:24,501
I mean, well, how would
you feel if your daughter

317
00:16:24,520 --> 00:16:26,498
got involved
in this whole world?

318
00:16:26,518 --> 00:16:29,506
Well, my daughter is involved
in this whole world.

319
00:16:29,526 --> 00:16:32,374
She runs the Playboy empire.

320
00:16:32,394 --> 00:16:36,391
Okay, let's try this
a different way.

321
00:16:36,410 --> 00:16:39,588
Well, look, suppose somebody
that you really care about

322
00:16:39,609 --> 00:16:44,385
like your wife,
suppose she decided to pose?

323
00:16:44,404 --> 00:16:46,493
Well, my wife
was the Playmate of the Year

324
00:16:46,513 --> 00:16:50,390
and I'm very proud of her.

325
00:16:50,410 --> 00:16:51,559
Don't you understand

326
00:16:51,580 --> 00:16:53,618
there are some parents
who are just not comfortable

327
00:16:53,637 --> 00:16:58,344
with their daughters being
stared at by millions of people?

328
00:16:58,364 --> 00:16:59,623
I understand
where you're coming from.

329
00:17:00,343 --> 00:17:03,431
Look, over the years, I've had
to deal with a lot of parents.

330
00:17:03,451 --> 00:17:05,430
You seem like a good man.

331
00:17:05,450 --> 00:17:07,618
Let me put it this way,
I promise you

332
00:17:08,337 --> 00:17:10,356
the pictures
will be tasteful.

333
00:17:10,375 --> 00:17:11,574
Tasteful?

334
00:17:11,594 --> 00:17:13,532
Oh, yeah, right.

335
00:17:13,553 --> 00:17:17,420
I know what that means.
Well, thank you very much.

336
00:17:22,497 --> 00:17:24,505
Jackie, you're here.

337
00:17:24,525 --> 00:17:26,554
Will, I thought you were sick.

338
00:17:26,574 --> 00:17:29,611
Oh, yeah, I was, but you
know

339
00:17:30,330 --> 00:17:31,609
I-I, at least
I thought I was.

340
00:17:32,328 --> 00:17:34,566
You know, actually, I had
an allergic reaction

341
00:17:34,586 --> 00:17:37,464
to-to-to bunnies.

342
00:17:39,444 --> 00:17:42,511
So, say, what's up
with that date?

343
00:17:42,531 --> 00:17:44,540
I'm sorry, Will,
but when you cancelled on me

344
00:17:44,560 --> 00:17:47,328
I made plans to go
to the movies.

345
00:17:48,326 --> 00:17:49,465
Oh, that's cool,
just-just call up

346
00:17:49,486 --> 00:17:51,305
your little girlfriend
and break them.

347
00:17:51,324 --> 00:17:53,572
My little girlfriend
is 6'2" with a mustache.

348
00:17:56,541 --> 00:18:00,388
What kind of monster are you?

349
00:18:00,407 --> 00:18:02,345
A man is laying up
in his death-bed

350
00:18:02,365 --> 00:18:03,445
and you go stepping out
on him?

351
00:18:03,466 --> 00:18:06,373
Hey, Will, you and me
ain't all that.

352
00:18:07,382 --> 00:18:09,310
Okay, okay, okay, um..

353
00:18:09,330 --> 00:18:10,399
What are you doing
after the movies?

354
00:18:10,420 --> 00:18:12,559
I think that's
between me and Tony.

355
00:18:14,326 --> 00:18:15,475
Okay, how about
tomorrow night?

356
00:18:15,496 --> 00:18:18,294
- I got basketball practice.
- That's cool, I'll come watch.

357
00:18:18,313 --> 00:18:21,281
You can't, you're working
tomorrow, Mike called in sick.

358
00:18:21,301 --> 00:18:24,339
He probably has
what you thought you did.

359
00:18:24,359 --> 00:18:26,497
- Okay, next Saturday night?
- Bachelorette party.

360
00:18:26,518 --> 00:18:28,427
- Christmas?
- I'm going home to Philly.

361
00:18:28,447 --> 00:18:32,384
Then New Year's Eve?
Groundhog Day?

362
00:18:32,404 --> 00:18:34,422
Cinco de Mayo?

363
00:18:34,442 --> 00:18:36,431
Rosh Hashanah, eh?

364
00:18:36,451 --> 00:18:38,479
[instrumental music]

365
00:18:40,287 --> 00:18:43,274
Well, I hope you're
proud of yourself, Vivian.

366
00:18:43,294 --> 00:18:44,334
What did I do?

367
00:18:44,354 --> 00:18:46,272
Your daughter is
somewhere in Malibu

368
00:18:46,292 --> 00:18:47,481
stark naked.

369
00:18:47,502 --> 00:18:49,341
What are you talking about?

370
00:18:49,360 --> 00:18:52,467
She went and posed for "Playboy"
and you encouraged her.

371
00:18:52,488 --> 00:18:54,477
I did no such thing.

372
00:18:54,497 --> 00:18:57,425
When I talked to her,
she hadn't made up her mind yet.

373
00:18:57,445 --> 00:19:00,472
If anything pushed her
over the edge it was your usual

374
00:19:00,492 --> 00:19:03,330
"Do it my way or else" charm.

375
00:19:03,349 --> 00:19:04,478
Don't you start
with me, Vivian.

376
00:19:04,499 --> 00:19:06,458
No matter what I did,
she's my daughter.

377
00:19:06,478 --> 00:19:08,386
And a daughter should
obey her father.

378
00:19:08,406 --> 00:19:11,334
In that case, I never would've
married you.

379
00:19:13,322 --> 00:19:16,449
Oh, that was different,
your father had it in for
me.

380
00:19:16,470 --> 00:19:19,268
What was it again
he didn't like about me?

381
00:19:19,287 --> 00:19:22,465
It was a tie between your
family and your temper.

382
00:19:22,486 --> 00:19:26,363
Well, I'll tell you one
thing,
I sure don't miss him.

383
00:19:26,383 --> 00:19:28,321
God rest his soul.

384
00:19:30,360 --> 00:19:32,398
Sweetheart, listen.

385
00:19:32,418 --> 00:19:35,406
Sometimes a parent
has to step back

386
00:19:35,426 --> 00:19:38,434
and let their child
find their own way.

387
00:19:45,487 --> 00:19:47,386
I'll be upstairs.

388
00:19:50,385 --> 00:19:52,453
- Hi, dad.
- Hi.

389
00:19:54,321 --> 00:19:55,430
Listen, daddy, I'm sorry

390
00:19:55,451 --> 00:19:57,239
but I've already
had my pictures taken.

391
00:19:57,258 --> 00:19:58,458
- It's alright.
- It was my choice and..

392
00:20:01,206 --> 00:20:02,426
It's alright?

393
00:20:02,446 --> 00:20:05,403
You're not a child anymore.

394
00:20:05,423 --> 00:20:07,492
You're a beautiful woman.

395
00:20:08,210 --> 00:20:09,389
'Beautiful enough
for "Playboy" to ask'

396
00:20:09,410 --> 00:20:12,228
'and woman enough
to make your own decisions.'

397
00:20:13,327 --> 00:20:15,346
No matter what,
I still love you.

398
00:20:17,263 --> 00:20:18,422
Oh, daddy.

399
00:20:25,297 --> 00:20:28,325
So when are your
pictures coming out?

400
00:20:28,346 --> 00:20:31,384
They said in about
two months.

401
00:20:31,404 --> 00:20:34,231
You understand, of course,
I can't be here when they do.

402
00:20:39,447 --> 00:20:42,464
[instrumental music]

403
00:20:49,179 --> 00:20:51,367
[knocking on door]

404
00:20:51,388 --> 00:20:52,438
Enter.

405
00:20:55,405 --> 00:20:57,324
It's arrived, Uncle Phil.

406
00:20:57,344 --> 00:20:58,393
I don't wanna see them.

407
00:20:58,413 --> 00:21:00,372
Oh, it came in the mail today

408
00:21:00,392 --> 00:21:02,360
with a personal letter
from Mr. Hefner.

409
00:21:02,380 --> 00:21:05,258
He thinks you should
take a look at it, so do I.

410
00:21:05,277 --> 00:21:07,186
You can forget it,
because I'm..

411
00:21:09,335 --> 00:21:12,253
Oh...alright.

412
00:21:18,328 --> 00:21:22,315
Hey, look at that,
she's covered up.

413
00:21:22,335 --> 00:21:24,413
♪ Hallelujah ♪

414
00:21:24,432 --> 00:21:27,210
♪ Hallelujah ♪

415
00:21:27,230 --> 00:21:29,319
Hallelujah,
she's covered up!

416
00:21:34,266 --> 00:21:36,391
But this little girl is not.

417
00:21:39,380 --> 00:21:41,536
- Ooh.
- Ooh.

418
00:21:41,558 --> 00:21:43,673
- Hallelujah.
- Hallelujah.

419
00:21:43,693 --> 00:21:45,839
♪ Hallelujah ♪

420
00:21:45,859 --> 00:21:48,797
♪ Hallelujah ♪

421
00:21:48,818 --> 00:21:51,068
♪ Hallelujah Hallelujah.. ♪

422
00:21:56,120 --> 00:21:58,151
Carlton, what do you care?

423
00:21:58,172 --> 00:22:00,256
Look, I will not be
publicly embarrassed by

424
00:22:00,277 --> 00:22:05,412
a-a-a problem of delivering
my damn lines.

425
00:22:05,433 --> 00:22:07,694
It won't happen, damn it.
It ain't gonna happen.

426
00:22:07,715 --> 00:22:10,716
- It's okay, it's okay.
- I'm not gonna allow it.

427
00:22:10,736 --> 00:22:12,861
- It's okay, it's okay.
- It's over!

428
00:22:12,882 --> 00:22:14,872
(Will)
'It's alright, man!
It's alright, man!'

429
00:22:14,893 --> 00:22:16,091
- 'Let it go, man, let it go.'
- 'It's over.'

430
00:22:16,841 --> 00:22:18,987
- 'It's okay, man'
- 'Alright.'